Chapter 66 Take control of your conversation time

Grasp the time of the conversation, and saying goodbye at the right time will leave a deep impression on others and achieve the purpose of the conversation.If you talk blindly, you will discount your own charm.This is the little secret in the communication of many successful people. James, a student who had participated in my course training class before, felt that what he had learned was not enough, so he entered my course training class again and asked to study again.After I welcomed him, I asked him, "What do you see as your biggest problem right now?" James replied honestly: "Honestly, I don't know. From you, I did learn enthusiasm, confidence, courage, and how to praise others... all of which have benefited me a lot."

I was also surprised, so I continued to ask him: "You must have won many friends." "Yes, that's true, but friends often don't welcome my second visit to their house." "Why is this?" "I don't know." James continued. Unexpectedly, he talked eloquently for nearly three hours, from his friend's character to the weather and customs in Alaska.I was already tired, but now I knew why James' friends didn't welcome him.James was too chatty and endless to know the art of saying goodbye, so I interrupted James and said, "Mr. James, I've seen why your friends don't welcome you."

"Oh, that's great, hurry up and teach me." James exclaimed excitedly. I couldn't bear to expose his shortcomings on the spot and make him lose face, so I said mildly: "Come to the training class tomorrow and see how other students do, and you will understand." James asked eagerly: "Can you tell me today? I really want to know." I smiled and persuaded: "Don't worry, it will be good for you to know tomorrow, anyway, I don't care about a day and a half." Seeing that I was talking about this point, James had no choice but to put on his hat reluctantly, and said regretfully, "Well, I won't know until tomorrow."

The next day, James came to the class.I assign tasks to the students, let them practice the art of speaking, and praise each other.Seeing that I hadn't said anything about him, James couldn't sit still.But I smiled and motioned him not to move.He had to be patient and watch the other students practice.When it was time to end get out of class, some students stood up and said goodbye to me, while some students remained in the classroom: one of the female students came over to ask a question. I listened carefully and explained to the trainee that I already considered her the most important person in the room.After the female practitioner left, several more practitioners came and surrounded me and asked me questions.I gave concise answers one by one, which left a deep impression on them.

James couldn't bear it anymore, so he came to me and said, "Can you tell me my problem?" I said, "Your talk is charming, full of artistry, and you are a person who is easy to win people's liking. "James was very happy when he heard this.I continued to praise him and said: "You make full use of the principles of enthusiasm and courage, and you are extremely gentlemanly, which makes everyone fascinated by you." James was confused by what I said, and hurriedly asked: "What is my question? Where is it?" I said slowly, "Didn't you notice how those students said goodbye to me just now?"

"No." "This is your shortcoming. You never observe how others say goodbye. You don't know the art of saying goodbye." "Is this the problem?" James said thoughtfully. I just mentioned to him that smart people know how to use the opportunity to bid farewell, and their farewell will often leave a deep impression on the other party, and at the same time achieve the purpose of communication, and described the art of farewell in detail.James listened humbly, and became more and more aware of his own problems.James has since followed this approach and become a popular socialite.It can be seen that mastering the skill of saying goodbye is of great significance in your communication.

First of all, talk with friends, pay attention to grasp the time.When visiting ordinary friends, the time should not exceed half an hour. If there is something important, you should make an appointment for a long talk.When visiting old acquaintances, if the other party is free, you might as well sit for a while, but you should also avoid saying one thing over and over again, which will make people feel annoying. Even if you are a friend with a good relationship, you should control the time of conversation, think about the other party, and grasp the time to say goodbye, so as not to affect the life and work of others. It will be boring over time, and you will not want to continue to communicate.In addition, you can say goodbye when the conversation is in full swing, which will leave a deep impression on the other party, which is undoubtedly a wise way of communication.