Chapter 56 A mature character who thinks twice before acting

Sometimes in life we ​​cannot avoid worry, and peace of mind is extremely important at this time.We must work hard to cultivate our peaceful and natural state of mind, so that our anxious heart can be calmed for a moment.When the mind is peaceful, cultivate a healthy and positive attitude towards life.Over time, you will be able to handle everything in life with ease. People who live in this world are doomed to face many responsibilities that must be borne in life.For those irresponsible people, in order to find excuses for their shortcomings and misfortunes, they can always think of a lot of reasons.The habit of blaming others when we fail or make mistakes is as old as human history.Even Adam would do the same. To excuse himself, he blamed Eve: "I was tempted by that woman to eat that apple."

One day, my youngest daughter, Ann, was trying to climb onto the refrigerator, and she waddled into the kitchen with a small chair.I ran to stop her, but it was too late, and she fell hard from the chair to the floor.I picked her up, she cried and kicked the chair vigorously: "This broken chair made me fall!" If you have been in contact with children, you must have heard such complaints.When children fall, they often blame innocent bystanders or something around them.But when they grow into adults, if they maintain this habit, trouble will follow. Know that taking responsibility for yourself is the first step toward maturity.Facing life bravely, you have to know that you are no longer the kid who only knows how to kick a chair when you fall down.

But in reality, irresponsibility is obviously much simpler.Because we can complain about our colleagues, teachers, environment, or get angry with our loved ones.If there is really no one to blame, we can also say that we are unlucky. In short, those who are unwilling to grow can always find excuses for their mistakes and failures.It seemed to them that everything was against them, that the whole world was against them, making their lives a mess. For those who are in a hurry to do things, this advice is very necessary.The ability to be clear about one's purpose and act on it is a necessary condition for people to develop a mature personality.First of all, we must judge correctly and clearly understand every factor that affects the judgment.

"Think before you go" and "investigate before investing" don't make us indecisive but rather avoid what might be a little reckless.People wouldn't do that sort of thing if they were realistic. What if doctors don't understand the cause before performing emergency surgery on a patient?In that case, the doctor does need to make an immediate decision, but an accurate prior diagnosis is necessary for a successful operation. Not long ago, I visited an art exhibition with a friend who has a lot of research on modern art.I stood in front of a painting, looked at it, and always felt that the author's painting was not very good.So I said to my friend, "My three-year-old daughter can draw better than him. If this can be art, then I am Michelangelo."

My friend said: "Don't you feel the pain shown in the painting? It shows the high spiritual tension and inner confusion of people in this era!" Yes, any third-rate painter can complain that the age has left him uninspired. What this era brings to people is not death and destruction, but hope and success.There is no doubt about it.Only those who are strong and mature and willing to take responsibility for their actions can survive in this era. But most people can't think like this.Instead, people sleep through the night without making appropriate decisions until the last moment.Acting in a hurry at the last moment will end up in an even more embarrassing situation.What we should do is: face up to the reality and study the problem until we grasp the key point.But we don't want to do that.

The answer is yes, but people ignore very common methods like this.We are always acting on emotions instead of facts.We act on impulse and let irrelevant things influence our behavior. This kind of behavior is naive and very childish, just like a child crossing the road without looking at the car, no matter how high the temperature is 40 degrees Celsius, he must go to the beach to play And the same as heatstroke.People usually act and act like idiots in a hothead. A woman once told me that she suspected her husband was cheating.She hesitated whether to show her cards to him, or to take the child back to her natal home.

I asked her, "Why do you suspect that he has betrayed you?" She said: "He does things differently now than he used to. Before, he was very easy-going, but now he is irritable and critical. He always says that he is tired from working overtime and doesn't want to go out with me. There are other little things. He doesn't even remember our wedding anniversary, he is not the same as before!" It sounds like something is wrong, but I still advise her to figure things out before taking action, and not to act rashly. I suggested that she send her husband to the doctor for a physical examination first, and then see if there is any problem with his work.

I was right.After the doctor's examination, he told her that her husband had to undergo surgery immediately.After the operation, her husband recovered his health and his temper was as good as before, and she dispelled her doubts. Although this matter is related to whether the marriage is broken or not, and it is related to every member of the family, this woman still wants to do things impulsively based on her own doubts, and almost makes a mistake. Of course, taking the initiative to take measures is an aspect of shaping a mature personality.But you must ensure that your understanding is correct before you act, instead of taking it for granted.