Chapter 17 develop strong self-control

Persist in doing something that you don't like every day, which will eventually allow you to gain self-discipline, perseverance, keep your promises, and enhance self-control. Self-control is the ability to control yourself.It refers to the ability to fully consciously and consciously control one's emotions and dominate one's actions. It is an important quality of will and an important element of emotional intelligence. Specifically, self-control is manifested in two aspects: one is to be good at forcing oneself to implement the decisions you have made; the other is to be good at suppressing desires and actions that are contrary to your own goals.That is to force yourself to do what you should do, even what you don't like.For example, if you plan to get up early and go for a run today, can you leave your warm nest and get out of bed without hesitation?You once decided not to take a taxi to save money to buy a house. Can you insist on waiting for the bus every day in the cold night and wind?You plan to memorize a certain number of words every day, will you put off the task until tomorrow because of playing ball or games?These are all tests of your self-control: whether you force yourself to make the right decisions, and whether you can restrain unhelpful desires and behaviors.

Usually, the composition of self-control is a contradiction, one side of the contradiction is emotion, and the other side is reason.If you let your emotions dictate your actions, you will make yourself a slave to your emotions, which is a manifestation of lack of self-control.Roy L. Smith said: "Self-control is like a controlled flame, which makes genius." In the 14th century, there was an aristocrat named Ronald III who was the orthodox duke of the ancestral fief. His younger brother opposed him and overthrew him.The younger brother needed to get rid of the Duke, but didn't want to kill him, so he thought of a way.After Ronald III was imprisoned, his younger brother ordered someone to change the door of the cell to be narrower than before.Ronald III was tall and fat, and he couldn't get out of prison if he was fat.The younger brother promised that as long as Ronald could lose weight and walk out of prison, he would not only be free, but also restore his title.It's a pity that Ronald is not the kind of person with self-control. He couldn't resist the temptation of the delicious food sent by his brother every day. As a result, instead of losing weight, he gained even more weight.

A person who has no self-control is like a prisoner in an iron fence.Any good team member understands that without self-control, it will never be possible to succeed.Excellent people have the courage to accept mental and physical training; they are willing to accept tasks beyond their imagination and devote themselves to it to complete it; they often keep their brains active, consider some challenging problems, and constantly think Treat things in order to train your self-control.And this self-control determines what people do when it matters.Biographer and educator Thomas Huxley said: "One of the most valuable outcomes of education is the self-control to do what is required, whether you like it or not."

An excellent person should also have a long-term vision, and every action should be aimed at their long-term goals; care about others, have good interpersonal relationships, and be willing to sacrifice personal interests; persevere, study hard, and maintain a positive and optimistic attitude in adversity Wait.So, how to improve self-control? (1) Strengthen ideological cultivation. People's self-control depends to a certain extent on the quality of their thoughts.Generally speaking, people with lofty ideals and ambitions will never be emotionally impulsive and produce bad behavior for trivial matters.

(2) Improve cultural literacy. Generally speaking, people with relatively high cultural quality are often able to understand things more comprehensively and correctly, understand the relationship between self and others, and consciously carry out self-control and self-improvement. (3) Stabilize emotions. Use methods such as venting reasonably, diverting attention, and moving the environment to vent and release the emotions that will trigger impulsiveness, maintain emotional stability, and avoid impulsiveness. (4) To strengthen self-awareness. Be calm and calm when encountering problems, use your own brains, eliminate external interference or hints, and learn to make independent decisions.It is necessary to completely get rid of the psychology of relying on others, overcome inferiority complex, and cultivate self-confidence and independence.

(5) It is necessary to strengthen practical training. On the one hand, we must strengthen learning, accumulate knowledge, broaden our horizons, arm and enrich ourselves with knowledge, improve our ability to analyze and solve problems, and expand our ability to determine problems by learning from other people's experience; Dedicate yourself to life practice, exercise hard, constantly enrich your experience, and improve your adaptability. (6) Strengthen willpower. It is necessary to cultivate the good quality of will independence in one's own character.Be highly conscious of what you are striving for.As long as you have identified something through your own practice, you should go on without hesitation and try to achieve the desired goal.There is no need to pursue perfection in everything, no need to demand that you have no failures, and no need to pay too much attention to what others say about you.