Chapter 87 Only say what should be said, not what should not be said

On one occasion, speaking at a meeting of newspaper editors, Lincoln pointed out that he was not an editor, so it was very inappropriate for him to attend this meeting.To illustrate why he had better not attend the meeting, he told us a little story: "Once, I met a woman riding a horse in the forest, and I stopped to make way, but she stopped too and stared intently at my face. "She said: 'I'm just now convinced you're the ugliest person I've ever seen!' "I said, 'You're probably right, but what can I do?' "She said: 'Of course you're born with this ugly face and you can't change it, but you can still stay at home and not come out!'"

Everyone laughed at Lincoln's humorous self-deprecation. Lincoln skillfully uses self-deprecation to express his intention of rejection.It does not embarrass people, but also makes people understand Lincoln's intentions in a pleasant atmosphere. Sometimes, in order to avoid telling the truth, they can also subtly find excuses to save themselves or save other people's face. When someone invites you to a dance party, and you really don't want to dance with him, you can say: "I'm tired and want to take a rest." This not only achieves the purpose of declining, but also does not hurt the self-esteem of others.

Someone made an appointment with you to participate in a certain activity, but you forgot at that time; or you regretted it later and did not go to the appointment.Telling the reason directly will affect others' trust in themselves, and it is also a disrespect for others.Under normal circumstances, the reasons for missing an appointment may be physical discomfort, family affairs, guests visiting, etc. You can choose a more reasonable one as an explanation afterwards. Inappropriate words can easily cause trouble.Half the troubles in the world are caused by bad words, and the other half by stupidity.Inappropriate speech is as dangerous as stupidity.Not all people who say things wrong are stupid people, but they did a stupid thing.Therefore, when you speak, you should have a ruler in your mouth, and you must think more about what you should say and what you should not say.

Saying stupid things and doing stupid things are sometimes closely linked.When speaking, you must control your emotions, be cautious in your words, only say what should be said, and keep the half of the sentence that should not be said.