Chapter 9 Three courtship letters, fleeting first love

China in the early 1980s was a time when entertainment was quite scarce.For college students, falling in love is the most important entertainment space.The girls in my class don't like me, and I'm not interested in the girls in my class either.My heart was high, and I happened to look at the beautiful girls in the 80th grade in the whole school.Soon, I made a list of Beiyou's top 50 beauties in the 80th grade in my heart, and I knew their names and majors clearly. On the list of the top fifty beauties, there is a girl from the telecommunications engineering department, and I have taken a fancy to it very boldly.Before the formal pursuit, I analyzed my own conditions.Although I am simple and ordinary, but being able to see one of the fifty beauties shows that I still have a good eye.In this case, I should have the opportunity and conditions to try the fun of life.The way to pursue it took me a lot of brains. After much deliberation, I still had to use the most traditional and most popular method at that time - writing to her.

In the first letter, I told her: My surname is Tang Mingjun, I am 1.82 meters tall and weigh 127 catties.Born in Changzhou, Jiangsu, his family was born in a poor peasant family.His father is a party member and has a primary school education.My mother is an ordinary person and has never been to school.There are three brothers in my family, I am the second child, etc. Simply put, I handed her a resume.Later, I thought, she must have been puzzled when she saw this letter, and she didn't know what the purpose of the writer was.My classmates in the same dormitory knew about my pursuit of girls from other departments, and no one was optimistic about me.Someone even teased me and said: Tang Jun, stop writing, if you write any more, you are just making a contribution to China's postal service.

But I didn't intend to give up just yet.So I went on to write the second letter. In this letter, I introduced to her the excellent international and domestic situation.The more important point is to express my views on major international and domestic events.At that time, there were not many people who had their own views on major events. I did this to send her a message: I am a very cultured and thoughtful person. After going to university in Beijing, because of the strong political atmosphere in the capital, I became very concerned about current affairs. This habit will greatly help me in my life and career in the future.Writing a love letter happened to be the first small test of the knife.

My No. 1 Idol in Life: Ronald Reagan Although I can’t remember what current affairs I mentioned in my letter back then, I still have my first idol in college because of paying attention to current affairs.That man was Ronald Reagan, then President of the United States. It was on the TV set in the dormitory of my classmates in Beijing that I saw his footage for the first time.In that news report, he returned to the White House from a summer vacation at Camp David, Maryland.When he disembarked from the helicopter, he saluted two Marines who came to greet him, with standard and formal gestures and a Reagan-style humor.I was immediately and strongly attracted by his demeanor.

I was reading newspapers and magazines in English at the time, so I learned more about him from them.Born as an actor, he is extremely charming both in appearance and language.Reagan's biggest feature is to use humor to influence others.No matter how serious the occasion is, he will first use humor to adjust the atmosphere.When encountering difficulties, he will also use humor to resolve them.And his humor is anything but vulgar.Later, people always said that I looked like Ronald Reagan.I found that I really resemble him: sunny, humorous, optimistic, with a very good attitude, passionate speeches, and a very good relationship with his wife.I have been observing him and learning from him.

From college to now, Reagan has always been the number one idol I admire.His humor, optimism and sunshine have taught me a lot of correct and brilliant attitudes towards life. There was still no response to the second letter.But that didn't stop me from writing an impassioned third letter. In this letter, I really told her that I like her.I wrote: "The reason I like you is very simple - love at first sight. Maybe now I look ordinary, even mediocre. Maybe now I am nothing to you. But I am hardworking and hardworking, you give In my 5 years, 10 years, 20 years, I will definitely become an extraordinary person. At that time, I will never let you regret it! I know that I am not qualified to pursue you now, but I only want to emphasize one point-I have no extravagant expectations You will like me, as long as I like you silently. No matter whether it is possible for me to be with you or not, the most important thing is that I hope you remember one thing - Tang Jun will always think of you at any time and any place. Remember you."

After writing the third letter, I felt that even if the girl was not moved, I was moved.As a result, she actually agreed to meet me.I saw a movie with her and we started dating in a serious way. Self-promotion of underprivileged groups The experience of writing courtship letters has also changed my personality in many aspects, especially in the attitude and skills of communicating with others. Now that I've admitted that I'm an underdog in college, I have to find self-promotion techniques that apply to underrepresented groups.This process is like the process of selling products.No company in the world has a perfect product, and it depends on the personality of the seller to sell it.The process of self-marketing is the process of bringing out one's own personality charm.

How to sell yourself better, my first advice to young friends is: rewrite your resume! Just writing a resume for courses taken is not competitive.A resume is for people to screen you for an interview, and it doesn't make you stand out from the competition.A good resume should reflect "where is your superiority compared with others" as much as possible.No matter what you have done, your resume should reflect every unique thing in your life experience. And, selling yourself has to be brave.Just like I did back then, you must firmly believe that: Life is like the process of plant growth, as long as you work hard and persevere, there will be flowers and fruits.

But we soon broke up.The trigger for the breakup was a gift I gave her. At that time, my living expenses were 20 yuan a month, and I spent 8 yuan in the store to buy a skirt for her.When I handed the skirt to her, I said something that many boys would say on that occasion: There is no other way to express how much I like you, only this skirt expresses my heart.Like many girls, she was moved by the words. It would have been perfect if things ended here.The problem is that while expressing my affection, I also made a vanity mistake that many boys often make.In order to emphasize the value of the gift, I exaggerated the price of the dress to 25 yuan.In my mind at the time, there was not much difference between 25 yuan and 8 yuan. They were both huge sums of money that required gritting your teeth to make up your mind to take out.Since it is a huge sum of money, why not make the number even bigger, so as to make the girlfriend happier?

Unexpectedly, the skirt I gave her made the girls in her dormitory very envious, and one of the girls also went to buy one.The style and color are all exactly the same, and the store I went to is the same.My lie was immediately exposed.She came to question me.Out of a kind of poor self-esteem, I said forcefully: "Yes, it is indeed 8 yuan, but you don't think that if you include my feelings in it, it is more than 8 yuan?" She turned and walked away very angrily. up.The angry footsteps announced the end of my short first love. From watching a movie for the first time to breaking up, it was actually only two or three months.Moreover, our love has been in a state of secret communication.In that era, if the relationship was made public, it meant that two people had reached the point of discussing marriage.Therefore, I never went to her dormitory to look for her, and sometimes I saw her eating with her classmates in the cafeteria, and it was not convenient to talk to her.Only when there was no one around while she was washing the dishes, did she go over and say a few words, and make an appointment with her on the time and place of the next date.The so-called dating is nothing more than going for a walk or watching a movie together, the number of times is no more than five or six times.I never even held hands with her.

However, for me, the most important thing is not the ending of the breakup, but the process of pursuing what I love during the breakup. This attitude has benefited my life endlessly. "Success 4+1" Diligence Opportunities are unequal, and they are given to those who work hard, those who fight bravely, and those who take a step ahead.Diligence is not only a necessary way to pursue success, but also our attitude towards life. Many people ask me: Tang Jun, how did you become the president of Microsoft China in 7 years from an ordinary programmer when you first joined Microsoft? There is no special answer. Only hard work, years, decades of hard work, hard work to the point that I will be moved.That's all my tips. When I was at Microsoft, the people around me were so good, how could I compare with them? Compared with hard work.When I left Microsoft, I wrote this sentence in the last letter I sent to Bill Gates: "I dare not say that Jun Tang is the most diligent in Microsoft, but no one dares to say that I am more diligent than Jun Tang." If It should be calculated in proportion, one point of cleverness, plus ten points of hard work, will become twelve points of perfection.Many college students think that they are excellent, so they often give up their diligence, which is absolutely undesirable. Only hard work can truly lead you to realize your life goals. This is what I want to give to every young friend.