Chapter 10 -2

Russell's autobiography that in the autumn of 1916 he "felt himself having a little love affair with Colt" - and the impassioned letters she received from him completely contradicted this - about Catherine he Then said: .. It was at this time that I began to understand her.Not sure if my impression of her is correct.. but when it comes to people she is envious, gloomy, and unsettlingly insightful, spotting the worst things people want others to know and the worst in their own nature.She hated Altrin because Murray didn't hate her. It was already clear to me that I had to get over my feelings for Altrin, because she was no longer giving enough in return to make me happy, and I listened to what Catherine said against her and ended up seldom believing it. ..it's hard to know who to trust.The only person Catherine calls cunning is the Pole who cheated on her of an apartment.Brett was right when he said "Russell is a jerk".

In February, Catherine left the "Ark" and moved into a studio at 1419 Georgie Street with the largest window—my "God looks down on me window"—in Radcree, half a mile away. Rent a few rooms at 47 Ferguson Street (JA Ferguson also has a studio on that street). Catherine wrote Otrin a letter from her "abbey", revealing that there had been some embarrassment, that she was a little afraid to meet her, but forgave everything.Her last letter to Russell, dated 24 February, indicates that their relationship was hampered by intellectual difficulties.He once sent her an article he had written, commenting on "The Post-War World," which concluded that if ordinary people, especially schoolchildren, were not informed about the truth of war, civilized man would disappear from the face of the earth. "Whether this is regrettable or not, I don't want to draw conclusions." Catherine was surprised, reading this article, she climbed with him to the heights, but found the process somewhat ironic, "I haven't fully recovered yet."

Five months later, Russell insisted that, as the author of an anti-conscription leaflet, he should be imprisoned, not the person who distributed it, so he was ordered to appear in court and fined. A few days before this Catherine had written to Ottering, "I am very sorry for Russell, I have seen him once; he is very interested in my work, I am glad to talk to him, he is in a good mood. We have not Talk about people and things now, and talk about all kinds of outlandish things—like flattery and compliments, and what people actually mean when they write, and so on. Russell wrote to tell Mrs. Meyerson that Catherine had seen him again, talked about her work, and seemed eager to be his friend.But then she probably heard about Colt (ie Mrs. Meyerson).

Studio in Chelsea For the moment I'm living in seclusion, just writing, reading, and writing—seeing no one, going nowhere. —Katherine Mansfield to Bertrand Russell February 24, 1917 The events of 19171 changed the history of all of Europe and the life of the relatively insignificant Katherine Mansfield.Although the scale of this comparison is too different, both contain multiple contradictions of destruction and regeneration, but they are similar. AJP Taylor vividly illustrates the nature of the changes in Europe in 1917 in his history of the Great War from a male point of view.Taylor said, "If Napoleon was resurrected in January, he would find that 'European history' still exists: tsars, kings, emperors and liberal politicians, great powers still fighting the same wars he knew, all of which Napoleon could identify and understand , but in the next 12 months he will be confused: at one end of Europe there will be Bolshevism, a new system of ideas and government; . in just one year produced the modern political world."

Yet another sea change occurred—a social change related to women.For the young men and women of England, the war had the opposite effect.On the battlefield, the machine gun killed half of Europe's young men, but before the women at home—because of the machines, not suffragettes—a new life unfolded.Among them was Miss Ida Baker, "the Colonel's Daughter," who wore a cotton cap and worked the lathes in the aircraft factory at Putney. She wrote: "I like the work here very much. Mr. Queeney is very friendly to us. I met Stella Delumont (later Mrs. Eustyss Passy) there and became good friends with her. and Mrs. Mary Hamilton." If the lathe didn't mean freedom to these two, at least it did to Ida, who had a landlord in Hamster, the good old Mrs. Butterwood, who every morning at five A good breakfast was prepared for Ida at half past, "and when I came back there was a warm fire and supper in the living room where I could rest and read".This inadvertently painted a picture of a new power, once the prerogative of men, that thousands of British women now got their first taste of in the middle of the war.The bus conductor found new things to do - yelled at all her passengers; the "businesswoman" lit a cigarette in public after lunch; The notion of how a woman should move her limbs; short skirts, short hair and bras—all of which brought women and youth to the 1960s.

For Katherine Mansfield, 1917 was also a year of increased creativity and sad news.In January, she was a ragtime intellectual woman whose exuberant energy attracted Bertrand Russell and unnerved Virginia Woolf.In the spring and summer she sprouted like a microscopic creature from the classical seed, the mimetic gift that would produce the best work, and in the autumn, after a period of fruitfulness, she began to chill and fever; and then at last was diagnosed with tuberculosis.Her whole life has changed, and the nature of her work has also changed. Instead of talking about what Goodyear called "café mirrors, dewdrops and grass, and superficial phenomena", she turned to inner exploration.

From then on, art became a blazing fire that consumed her life. Her revival of creativity probably began with a light-hearted Christmas skit written at Gaxington; in the spring, ① the official entry of the United States into the war and the outbreak of the October Revolution in Russia. ——Annotation ②British historian, life unknown. ——Annotation It seems that Oriega helped again. The New Age hits tough times again—harder than ever.His right-hand man was at the front, and Beatrice Hastings was no longer with him; Oriega ran the magazine alone, writing most of the articles himself and enlisting the help of old friends.He seems to have received financial support from Bernard Shaw (he also rewrote the manuscript), and some newcomers have appeared: TE Hume sent back manuscripts from the front, Ezra Pound was creative and non-stop, Oriega Must also ask Catherine for help, she sent a kind heart, she provided some "fragments" in April, and then wrote 8 manuscripts in the form of dialogues, which Oriega himself appreciated very much.She also started writing plays, and Ottline invited her to spend Easter at Justington.

But she wrote back that she dared not interrupt the work at hand: "I have a half-written script, and God knows how many short stories and illustrated illustrations and synopses to write." In June, 1917, a pamphlet entitled "Prufrock and Others" appeared in London, and was immediately circulated to Josington. Clive Bell brought a few copies from the city and distributed them to everyone.He said, "Like the Easter bread, Prufrock itself caused an uproar and a lot of talk, and Catherine Mansfield read poetry aloud. She admired the poem then, its cadences echoing in her mind, and she later made an amusing remark to Virginia Woolf that she did not think Eliot was a poet, because "in any case Prufrock It’s a short story.” Outside of writing, Catherine spent the spring and summer in peace, working hard and making new discoveries.Goodyear is dead, and if it is true that his outspoken criticisms have kept her from writing for the past 12 months, then that stage has passed.

She doesn't quite live in "The Abbey" by herself, Ada often comes to visit, although she has to walk a long way: getting up at 5 a.m. to go to work in Putney, then to Chelsea, and finally back to Hamster's sleep at home.The following is also a piece for "New Times" Another night Ida came to see me and she brought me some oysters.Oh, I said, the smell reminds me of a little café in Marseilles, how vividly I remember an evening.Then I looked up and saw Ida's face change--became strangely blank, and then serious and dejected. "Wait a minute, dear," she said, "I'm going to go and have a look." She went away, and came back with a smile on her face. "Yes, dear, an evening in the little café," she said, compose herself.But after she was gone, it occurred to me that whenever I said anything to her, she always behaved like this. "Can you wait a minute, honey, I'm going to get a handkerchief", or "Can I go to the kitchen and put the teapot on first?..", "As for the little cafe, honey, let's get on with it!" "No, I forgot." Very distressed: "Oh, you didn't, you really didn't." "Yes, indeed. Have you washed your hair lately? The color is so beautiful, like beer."

"No, I haven't washed it for a long time, it's time to wash it, and it's all clumped." According to the pattern of women's speech, which one is the correct answer? One will notice that friendships between women (with a lot of time spent brushing their hair in between) are always on the verge of squabbling.Soon, because of the long daily commute, Ida couldn't bear it, and Catherine needed her help again, so it was decided that she had better move in.He and Pound and others strongly advocated the Imagist movement and are the main founders of this school.His main works include "Thinking", "Notes on Language and Style" and so on. ——Annotation ②The author of this book is TS Eliot. ——Annotation However, there is no bedroom in the studio, there is only a space separated by a curtain under the place used as a balcony, and a bathroom behind.At the other end of the corridor was the kitchen, where Ada had abandoned the Hamster quarters and slept here, separated by another curtain.Murray’s diary briefly describes the life in this three-in-one studio: Ada is taking a bath in Kay’s bathroom, and Catherine’s back is facing the door. Suddenly she hears the door open and knows that Ada is standing there naked, Knowing that she wants Kay to turn and look at her and say "you look really good".But Kay wouldn't turn around, feeling Ada's shame and utter disappointment—of course she was happy.

If Ada had visitors while she was in bed, she had to lie still so as not to embarrass them.One of the visitors to Catherine's quaint little den was Aldous Huxley, who told his brother Julian that conversation broke off on a Sunday night when Catherine suddenly cried out, "Lie behind a curtain Somebody's muffled voice" replied, "I never knew there was anything else. Maybe it was unavoidable on Sunday, but they arranged for Ida to come after nine o'clock on Sunday. She wrote in her own The book claims that Katherine and Murray were "separated" by this time, but based on Murray's diary, this does not seem to be the case. In any case, there is always a completely different and overriding reason for Murray and Katherine to separate. Two places. In August 1918, Catherine finally divorced Mr. Borden. According to the law at that time, after the commencement of proceedings, if the Crown Attorney could prove that she was living with Murray, all would be ruined. Ada said: " "Separated" is also mysterious, declaring this to be the case but being vague when asked why. In any case, it can be said that both Murray and Catherine were more creative than ever at the time, both eager to become famous, and as for Catherine, she really needed to "be a writer first and a woman second" at this time: Night, After dinner is cleared, blowing the crumbs off the book you are reading, lighting the lamp, and curling up by the fire—this is the time to listen to the rain, and you feel a sudden silence, and you open your eyes wide, it is What?Hey, it's raining, I was a little reluctant at first, and then it became more and more urgent, knocking on the window, knocking on the door, and the rain came.The air seems to change; you feel water running in the dark, even your hands and face get cold, you start walking back and forth, the rain is so loud, you see yourself in the mirror and think you are ugly.You say to the ugly guy in the uneven mirror, "I'm 28, and I have chosen, and definitely willfully, to live alone forever." The guy in the mirror gives a short laugh and says, "That's saying play"①, but you answer gravely, "If you're English, don't speak French. It's a bad habit." Now there was a rush of footsteps up the garden steps and stopped at the door, and someone came, but did not knock.There was another footstep, another pause, as if someone was fumbling with the wet doorknob in the dark.You can be sure someone is there, and you remember that the kitchen door is still wide open, and you run up to it and close it.Did the rain come in?No, it didn't, you poked your head out for a while and saw two little gutters flying into the garden, in the dark, it sounded like a woman crying, laughing, talking, complaining, out in the damp garden, laughing out loud.One said, "Life is not happy, Catherine, life is not happy." But now that the rain had stopped, the lamp-post outside was yellow in the light, and a shining branch passed over it, looking like the A terrible painting. Yes, the rain is about to stop, and you light up the fire, squat down, and spread your hands, as if you were just rescued from a sinking ship, and you are happy enough to be alive and safe. ① This sentence is in French in the original book. —— Annotation Catherine's first impression of Virginia Woolf gradually disappeared, and the friendship between the two developed in the studio.The old Sobiejowski came again, and at his urging, Catherine began to cooperate with him in translating a play by a certain Polish writer.Introduced by Huxley and Strachey, she also met once or twice with the young poet TS Eliot.In fact, she met Eliot at a dinner party a few days after Jossington had read "Prufrock."She wrote to Otline describing an evening at St. John Hutchinson's with Eliot, Robert Graves and Roger Fry among the guests. This time "Mary" is the hostess and "Jack" is the host.At the end, she said: Oh my God, these parties!It was all very good in retrospect, but it was extremely boring to participate in.Mary, of course, tried her best to praise Roger Fry and Robbie Rose, keeping her eyes on Graves and glances now and then at Elliott, and now and again George Moore and The voices of Max Pilboom and Sir Curson talking.Jack was cutting the roast in a white apron, looking very English, and poor Elliott was growing paler and more reticent.In the middle sat Graves, who kept talking about what he had said to the sergeant, what the soldiers had said to him, how he had forced them back with a pistol, and so on.I didn't like that young man at all, in fact I wanted to contradict him by telling him that one only talks when one has something to say; The water was so dull... I left with Elliott, past rows of houses behind private fences that smelled bad, many cats in heat scuttled between the roads, and the sky was full of the moon.I like him so much that I don't see him as my enemy. In another letter, she captured Eliot's expression with the lightning speed of her instant camera: "I want to talk to you about Sassoon . . . I want you to laugh at me and Resp staring at Alder The time spent with his khaki-clad brother and the elegant French poet Eliot .. I would like to ask if I can go to Justington next weekend?" "Resputin probably means Sobini Olski). A few years after Catherine's death, Ottering wrote that she often felt inferior to Catherine insisting that artists were different, and that in retrospect she remembered that Catherine never lost sight of her role as a writer, "as Queen Victoria did not will forget that she is a queen", but because of lack of insight, she has no compassion, looks down on people, people's sincerity confuses her, "doesn't know how to deal with it". She once told Altrin that she didn't know when she was acting and when she was living, and "do I still have my true self?" But behind all of this, in her magical New Zealand In her childhood, there seemed to be a mysterious sanctuary, where her "true self" lived, and there was once an innocent child. One day in April, in Hogarth House, Virginia Woolf opened a package of printing in the dining room ① St. John Hutchinson (1879~1971), British journalist, editor of the newspaper "Daily Telegraph". ——Annotation ②Robert Graves (1895~?), British poet, novelist, and critic.Served as an officer in World War I.His main works include "Farewell to Everything", "On English Poetry", "The Golden Fleece" and so on. ——Annotation ③ Robbie Ross (1869~1918), British writer, art connoisseur, friend of the famous writer Wilde. ——Annotation ④George Moore (1852～1933), Irish novelist and playwright. ——Annotation ⑤Sir Curson (1859～1925), a British Conservative politician. ——Annotation ① Sassoon (1886～1967), a British poet, is famous for his anti-war poetry and novel-style autobiography.His representative works include "The Road to Peace" (poem), "Memoirs of George Sherston" (autobiography) and so on. ——After translating and annotating, she told her sister that she was going to visit Katherine Mansfield, "maybe get a short story from her".The only applicable manuscript was, of course, "Aloe," now for the first time being treated as a stand-alone short story, and given a new title, "Prelude," at Murray's suggestion. The whole work has been streamlined and condensed, and the procrastination and dialogue have been removed.Here's how Nanny used to do Beryl's hair when the girls lived together at Miss Birch's flat in Aloe Vera, a reminiscence of Catherine and Ida at Miss Wood's flat: but, almost Every time I combed her hair like this, it always broke up badly. What stupid thing did Nanni do: She would suddenly grab Beryl's hair, bury her face in it, kiss, or put her hands around Beryl's head, press In front of my firm chest, sobbing: "You are so beautiful, you don't know how beautiful you are-how beautiful!" Beryl felt very frightened at this time, and couldn't help feeling a kind of extreme physical disgust towards Nan Fry: "Enough, enough, thank you, you combed it beautifully, good night, Nan!" She even Not wanting to hide her contempt and disgust,.. Strange that Nan Fry seems to understand this, and even expects this answer, but she never argues, just awkwardly walks out of the small room, maybe whispering "forgive me" at the door . What's even more amazing is that Beryl let her brush her hair the next time and let this happen again,.. this kind of stupid thing happens between two people, it always ends the same way, and neither of them during the day word mention. After consideration, this passage was deleted because of different facts, which did not apply to the Overture. "Overture" Beryl admiring her hair in front of the mirror, Kecia hugging her very dirty tabby cat - Kecia is Carroll's real Kath, the one that Altrin believes has had Innocent Child - rushes into the room to tell Aunt Beryl that Father is back and lunch is ready, "Damn it", Beryl runs out of the room.Kecia opened a bottle of face cream, hugged the cat to the mirror, and stuck the cap on the cat's ears, "Now, look at yourself", the cat rolled down in surprise, and the face cream bottle cap flew out like a coin. Turned around on the linoleum,—but didn't break, "then she tiptoed and ran away..." There are three selves here: innocence, experience, and false experience.And so the Prelude ends, giving us only a glimpse of that stillness and tranquility that Wordsworth might call passionately nostalgic. ① Wordsworth (1770-1850), a famous British romantic poet. "Poetry is the tranquility and tranquility of passionate remembrance" is his famous saying. ——Annotation Catherine and Virginia, when the two met from 1917 to 1923, they were "absent-minded", but they were all ready to go hand in hand, so that their talents could be fully utilized and some immortal works could be created.It is evident that the older one suffers from a competitive complex, and fears that the younger one will overtake her even though she is in a better position. Virginia Woolf was 34 years old when she met Catherine for the first time. At that time, her only published work was "Voyage", a traditional novel. It took her 7 years and two mental breakdowns to complete it. this works.She herself considers it "long and tedious" but is afraid of being rejected. She is now writing the long "Night and Day" but has not yet written the short story "Kew Gardens" - which is her first departure from Traditional narrative method——but Catherine is only 28 years old at this time, healthy and confident. She said a long time ago that one of her books is "childish and bad", and recently began to find new ones, which Li Dun called "wonderful and outstanding" form of fiction writing. Both women had experienced early trauma, and both were forced to live behind some kind of mask, with so much that neither of them dared to admit.Virginia, threatened by the impending insanity that comes with creative outbursts, publishes "Voyage" and is followed by a nervous breakdown that Catherine knows nothing about - bursts of screaming frenzy, Four nurses stood by day and night, and her devoted husband did not see her for weeks.All of which Woolf concealed from the outside world. What Catherine goes to Hogarth House to meet is a woman who enjoys married life and can write in her own room.Miss Beecham, from Thornton, and Sir Leslie Stephen's daughter could not have started the contest as equals, had it been a contest. The future is unpredictable, and Catherine died before reaching Virginia's age, leaving behind only two books.Virginia did not know this, and certainly could not take comfort in it; nor did she know that she would live another eighteen years to achieve the achievement and fame she expected. Barriers of social status are insurmountable.Virginia's family line included Thackeray, John Addington Symonds, and even Ralph Vaughan Williams; she had known Henry James as a girl, and she and her sister From an early age, he was familiar with the Cambridge-style conversations of his brother's friends at Trinity College-both husbands were members of these circles of friends. When Middleton Murray, an Oxford student on a scholarship, told Hal Beecham's daughter in 1913 that the Wolfe members belonged to a "totally incompetent Cambridge group," he undoubtedly entered his prejudices first—as the two Strachey told Virginia years later - "Katherine Mansfield - if that's her real name - which I've never been sure of - is a really interesting chap . . would like to make your acquaintance —a hideous, expressionless mask-like face—behind which hides a keen intellect with some vulgar fancy.” Virginia replied, "For three years, she has been following my tracks"; To produce a good work, you must first have a "room of your own". ——Annotation ② Thackeray (1811~1863), a British Victorian novelist, his representative work is "Fame and Fortune". ——Annotation ③ John Eddington Symonds (1840~1893), British essayist, biographer and poet.His representative is "Italian Renaissance", which has 7 volumes. It is not a systematic historical monograph, but a combination of several essays, which is known for its graceful and smooth writing style. ——The translation and annotation match.Sidney Watterow, who actually courted Virginia, was Catherine's distant cousin and another intermediary, but he had told Virginia that his Australian grandmother was the daughter of a spy (“He regretted it very much, and I felt the same way”) Virginia never thought of him very much, and a few years later, when he shared a flat with Murray in Catherine’s absence. The houses, which Virginia called "swine houses," were crowded with "pigs, dogs, mice," and the like. Woolf, too, never liked Murray, who nobly and unselfishly endured his own suffering from his wife's illness while feeling "angry and disgusted" with Murray's "hypocrite vanity."He did like Catherine—"I don't think there was anyone back then who could make me laugh like she did"—and he thought she was a "very serious writer" while Murray made her perverted and damaged. By midsummer, the two had gotten to know each other so well that Virginia told her sister that Catherine seemed to have "everything since she was 17" and "had better ideas about writing than most people ".She also told Violet Dickinson that Catherine had traveled around the Scottish moors with a traveling circus and had all sorts of experiences. "It sounds like either Kay was talking random nonsense to her, or she didn't quite remember what Kay said. In July, Catherine wrote to Lady Morel, surmising that by then Virginia "was still very ill" and could seldom leave her home and surroundings.Kay had dinner with her last week and found her fascinating, "I really liked her very much—that was when I first felt her strange, flashing mind—almost the first time she seemed to belong to One of those Dostoyevsky women whose innocence has been compromised—and I decided at once that I understood her perfectly—don’t know if you agree.” When the Woolfs moved to Ashham Cottage in Sussex, they invited Catherine to spend the weekend with them, and she was to bring a typescript of the Overture.But she and Virginia aren't very keen on it, at least on Virginia's part because Clive Bell and Maynard Keynes have been spreading the word about Bloomsbury lately Catherine's gossip undoubtedly connected her with Bertrand Russell, so on the Wednesday before Catherine's visit, Virginia had just read a letter written by Catherine that made her admire, To Mrs. Morel: Catherine Mansfield has pictured your garden: the leaves of the roses withered in the sun, and the pools and people's long conversations wafting to and fro in the moonlight, aroused her romantic sentiments; She, it was a relief after going through the actors, the train timetables and the paint pots. Here's a letter from Catherine to Mrs. Morel that same Wednesday: Your description of the garden--all the flowing greens and golds makes me wonder again who's going to describe that garden, how wonderful it would be, you know do i meanThere will be people walking in the garden—couples, their conversations, their loitering—the glances they pass each other as they pass by—their lingering in front of the flowers, as if they hear their greetings—the brilliance is dazzling, The fragrance is rich and lingering. The gardens are so well-groomed and graceful that they are almost equivalent to "flowers of the heart," and the beholder cannot help but want to lean over and touch them to confirm.The couples must have been different, there must have been a certain charm - some seemed extremely "eccentric" and alienated from the flowers, but others felt genial and natural.In musical terms, there is a talk written for flowers, do you like that? ..full of possibilities, I'll give it a try when I have time. After returning to London after spending the weekend with a typed copy of the Overture, Catherine wrote Virginia a thank-you letter, a line of which is oft-quoted later confirming the literary connection between the two : "We found the same job, Virginia, and it's amazing how far apart we both are after almost the same thing." The letter also said "Yes, your garden is very nice Over it, a layer of still, trembling, shifting light envelops me, and I am fascinated by those who merge into pairs in the bright air." This means that Catherine has read her story "Kew Gardens", in which 4 couples with different attitudes walk among the flowers, just as described in the letter to Otline. Virginia, who had published a novel but no short stories before their meeting, wrote two important short stories shortly after their meeting—"Kew Gardens" and "The Mark on the Wall"—of which One is an attempt at the latter aspect, and it is also her first departure from the traditional way of seeing things.It can be seen that Catherine helped Virginia Woolf break the way she had always used to some extent. During the "Sweeping Maid Prelude", Catherine made some revisions to the manuscript and wrote some short stories. Among them, Lichekhov appeared as a writer and allowed Catherine to write some works of different lengths. In autumn, the studio is filled with figs, quinces and all kinds of ideas.Murray declined the invitation to visit Gazington, saying that Catherine had retired to write stories "that will be as successful as those she has committed to the benevolent Hogarth Press." On the Monday when Catherine dined at Hogarth House and looked at the proofreading, Virginia happened to start writing regularly in her diary, so the entry for October 10, 1917 reads "Waiting for Kay Mansfield to come." Eat, we can discuss many delicate issues", these actually have nothing to do with "Overture", referring to the gossip spread by Clive Bell and the consequences.And then the next day's diary: yesterday's dinner is over, the subtleties have been discussed, and we both hope that people's first impression of Kay Mann will not be like a civet cat running into the street Smells all over her body, and to be honest, the first time I saw her, I was taken aback by how vulgar she was, how rough the contours of her face were, but when that first impression wore off, I thought she was so smart, unbelievable, and worth it make friends. Leonard Woolf, who has paraphrased the passage at will, makes a masculine mistake that Virginia herself would not have made, saying that Virginia dislikes Catherine's "cheap perfume smell and sad mood." Catherine was fond of a rather expensive French perfume called Fragrant Flowers (perhaps it reminded her of the flaming gorses all over Wellington's hills), and it is not known whether she had sprinkled it on her visits to Hogarth House, but anyone who knew the three sisters Anyone can categorically deny that the Beechams, including debauched Catherine, would wear "cheap perfume."Of course, going to dinner with Leonard and Virginia after wearing perfume, and then reading the proofreading together is obviously a big mistake. Did Virginia think it was cheap or expensive that Catherine smelled that night?Did Virginia not like perfume at all?Perhaps the problem involved a larger disagreement between the two women. Catherine, with what Lawrence calls a "good animal" nature, does enjoy the sensual life, while Virginia shuns it, which is why she has this curiosity in it.Catherine did like food, smells, colors, and music (especially songs) so strongly that almost all curiosity was ruled out, while Virginia was very curious about her but at the same time found it vulgar; Disgust is also a shortcoming in her work. Mrs. Woolf rarely mentions Catherine's appearance and clothing in her diary (the "thick outline" must mean something else, because it fades away at night), while in other cases she is very concerned about her appearance and clothing. This aspect of the description is never sparing pen and ink.Anne Estelle said that Catherine was "good-looking . . . feminine and very attractive", while Frieda Lawrence said she was "well-mannered and well-groomed", and many others said similar things, although Mrs. Morel had said that Catherine's clothes were of "pretty mediocre taste," Frank Harris's wife said she was "not at all beautiful," five feet four feet tall, and "plump," and Frances Calco seemed to know her. There were times when I was sloppy.However, what impression one woman's clothing makes on another is the most difficult to determine. 那次晚餐时，因为维吉尼亚当时正在写一篇有关亨利?詹姆斯的文章，因此有些关于他的谈论，维吉尼亚认为凯瑟琳对此很有见解，但是此时门铃响了，“是一位名叫莱斯利?莫尔的兵工厂工人..一位举止不够得体，当然居于社会底层的女人”来接凯瑟琳回到切尔西去。 凯瑟琳给在苏格兰的布雷特写信，说吴尔夫夫妇对她的《序曲》“用金碗盛了许许多多的称赞话，我不由地感到非常满足”，而这整封信似乎都是这种满足的流露：我觉得你现在画静物是非常正确的，当你面对着这么美妙的一堆圆鼓鼓的鲜果，就会情不自禁地去聚拢，抚摸它们——而且成为其中之一。每次我经过一个水果摊时，都不由自主地停下脚步，凝视着，直至感到我自己也变成了一尸苹果，感到任何时候都能奇迹般地从体内变出一只苹果来，就像魔术师变出鸡蛋那样，..当你画苹果时，你不觉得你的乳房和膝盖也变成了苹果吗？或者你认为这纯属胡说八道？我不这样认为，肯定不。当我描写白色鸭子时，我发誓我自己是一只圆眼睛的白鸭子，浮在一个四周围着黄泥的池塘中，圆圆的眼睛不时瞥一眼另一只仰面在我身下浮游的鸭子。事实上变成鸭子的整个过程（也许劳伦斯会称之为与鸭子或苹果同时达到高潮！）如此令人激动，我几乎不能呼吸，只能一心想着它，虽然这仅是大部分人能达到的境界，但仅仅是序幕，接着是那样一个时刻，你比鸭子，苹果和娜塔莎等实物更胜一筹，因而你重新创造了它们。 布雷特：（关上助听器）“凯瑟琳，我求你不要说了。告诉我们星期天晚上在兄弟会教堂发生的一切吧。” 无疑上述一段话也是那种维吉尼亚颇为欣赏的与凯瑟琳谈话的一个例子。 一个星期六早上，维吉尼亚同姐姐瓦妮莎和邓肯?格兰特坐在工作室内谈论着艺术，瓦妮莎和邓肯将英格兰画家的生活同法国画家相比，说在英国没有人有资格被看作画家，也没有人像凯瑟琳和福斯特一样值得与之共同谈论正经事。此时，福斯特已经发表了除《印度之行》以外的所有小说。 凯瑟琳和维吉尼亚有一段时间未见面，显然是因为克莱夫?贝尔那段插曲。给《序曲》排字花了5个多月，恰好在这几个月内，疾病完全改变了凯瑟琳的生活。 到了1918年6月底，《序曲》将要出版，维吉尼亚在日记中说小说似乎“有些夸夸其谈”，随意掺杂了一些凯瑟琳“廉价的现实”，但也不乏艺术作品的生命力。接着凯瑟琳的新故事《幸福》发表在《英语评论》上，维吉尼亚对其不屑一顾，惊呼道：“她完了。”她总的认为，凯瑟琳的心智是贫①弗兰克?哈里斯（1856～1931），爱尔兰新闻记者、作家。他的代表作有《我的生活和恋爱《王尔德传》等。他主编过不少杂志，最主要的是《星期六评论》。一译注瘠的土壤，整个故事的主题“贫乏，廉价，是她那尽管不完善，然而有趣的心智的反映”。秋天，默里夫妇已在汉姆斯特买了一所房子，维吉尼亚开始几乎每个星期登门拜访凯瑟琳，发现自己越来越喜欢她。圣诞节过后，她感到迷惑不解，觉得凯瑟琳似乎“抛弃了”她，没有对她送去的圣诞礼物表示感谢，她当然想不到凯遭受了什么痛苦，才导致了这种关系破裂。 从此，凯瑟琳的生活重复着英格兰度夏、地中海度冬的痛苦方式，打断了她的婚姻、友谊以及其他一切。维吉尼亚对这些情况有时只是冷眼旁观。 1919年春夏季，默里被任命为《雅典娜神庙》①的主编，此时这两位妇女有过最好的会面，写下了最长的日记。3月22日记载了维吉尼亚对这“不可捉摸”的女人的恼火，但是又有“一种自然有趣的感觉，我想这来自于她对我们宝贵艺术真诚的关心，虽然这种关心的方式与我的不同。”下面是凯瑟琳给莫瑞尔夫人的信：我确切地了解你对维吉尼亚的看法——一直是美伦美奂的人儿，而最后突然一下子变成了一只鸟，飞上最高的树端，从那儿继续谈话..她像我想象中的鸟儿那样爱美；她俯瞰着自己描写过的“那个步子高低不平的绿色昆虫”，而她自己却不是她描写的主题——她上下翱翔着，飞跃过地面，优雅地飞着——像鸟儿一样在水中看见自己可爱的身影——但却不是人的形象。 那个夏天她俩可以愉快地共度一小时的时光。维吉尼亚发现自己的确喜欢凯瑟琳，觉得她们已有了一些耐久的基矗然而，遗憾的是前面还有障碍。 秋天，凯瑟琳去了南方，意大利的里维埃拉①，她在那儿给《雅典娜神庙》写小说评论。默里给她寄去《夜与昼》，维吉尼亚构思这本书，作为“传统体裁方面的练习”（这是她自己的话），也许是在经历过《远航》的恐惧后的一种康复工作。她自己也知道这并非出自她最好的才智，甚至称其为“那没完没了的《夜与昼》”。 凯瑟琳对此一无所知，认为一位严肃的作家最近的一部作品总是比以往向前迈进一步，觉得此小说平淡乏味，但其中也有她痛恨的地方。她害怕评论此书，当时她正处于精神非常紧张的状态，因为对死亡的恐惧和其他原因，所以16天内有9封信中都谈到她对评论此书的担忧。她个人的意见是：“这是心灵的谎言，战争从来就不存在：那就是它要传达的意图。..”此书流露出读书人的势利观念，但她又不能说这种话，“我尽力做到态度友好，出于好心而犯了过失”——等等。 无疑评论是认真的，凯瑟琳对此进行过严肃的思考，文章富有洞察力，措辞谨慎，根本谈不上对小说的不公平。不幸的是，文章将小说比作一艘静静地驶入港口的轮船时，无意中使用了一些造成伤痛的词句，起因于轮船属于女性词：“这种奇异之处在于她的冷漠，她宁静完美的气质，没有任何迹象表明她刚刚完成了一个危险的航程——没有任何伤痕。” 维吉尼亚感到评论含有恶意，吴尔夫也这样认为，他们一直盼望着称赞，对当时凯瑟琳在意大利时的糟糕境况一无所知。 除开势利观念不谈，在这段插曲后隐藏着的是凯瑟琳超离于个人的感①英国维多利亚时代最著名的文学评论杂志，1828年创刊，1921年停刊。——译注①里维埃拉是地中海沿岸地区，包括法国的尼斯、芒通，意大利的圣雷莫等。——译注觉：她相信（在停战的那个星期她曾就此对维吉尼亚谈过）小说必须对第一次世界大战有很深的理解，她告诉默里说《夜与昼》实际上否定了战争，又接着说：我不喜欢（但愿此事没有发生）总动员和在比利时的暴行，小说不能把战争排除在外，必须有心情的改变，看见人类“安定下来”，的确有一种恐惧感。我最深切的感受是一切都会改变——作为艺术家，我们如果不这样想，就是一种背叛、我们必须把它考虑在内，找到表达我们新思想，新感觉的新的方式和模式。 后来她写了自己的杰出作品，几天以后，她又对自己关于战后小说的想法加以展开：我不能想象经过战争以后人们还能重过以前的生活。好像战争从未发生过一样，我会对你说我们死而复生，生活怎么会一样呢？这并不意味着生活不再宝贵，或“光明和白昼的普通事物”已经消失，它们没有消失，而是强化了，被照亮了。现在我们明白了自身的意义，从某一方面来说这是一种悲剧，似乎尽管我们复活了，我们还是面临着死亡，但是经过了生活，这是关键，我们在生活中看见死亡，就像在盛开的花朵中看见死亡一样。我们歌颂花朵的美丽，我们将使这种美永垂不朽，因为我们知道。你是这样感觉的吗？ ——或者不同——那么是怎样的呢？ 但是你当然不会认为我这样说意味着享乐主义，不，我的意思是“广大无垠的沙漠”。然而你我之间的差别是（也许我错了）我不能告诉任何人冲出这些沙漠，它们是我的秘密。我可以描写一个男孩吃草莓，一个女人在微风飘拂的早晨梳理头发，这是我能唯一提及它们的方式。但是它们一定在那儿，别的方式都不行，它们可以出现和隐退，在自己喜欢的最美妙的空气中跳跃，但是我对它们厌烦透了，维吉尼亚。 似乎遗憾的是凯瑟琳和维吉尼亚都谈不上冲出她们广大无垠的沙漠。 冬天过去了，两人没有通过信，凯瑟琳回来后，似乎也不急于见面——但这得怪她患了寒热。她现在“有些像只猫，冷漠，镇静，总是独自一人——观察力敏锐”。但接着她们又融洽起来，维吉尼亚发现她以独特的方式表达自己的情感：她自己只有对伦纳德?吴尔夫才会用同样脱离现实的方式谈论、不加修饰地写作，像写日记一样。 夏天有了更多的会面，维吉尼亚去默里夫妇在汉姆斯特买下的房屋拜访。看望“像一只受伤的动物”那样在房间内走动的凯瑟琳。最后一次拜访过她以后，维吉尼亚探究自己内心情感的冷漠：她是否像自己应该的那样深有感触呢？凯瑟琳对她们的分手会在意吗？她意识到了自己的冷漠，但对“不能再同她谈话”又感到茫然。 《幸福及其它故事》出版，正赶上圣诞节，在《文学副刊》上受到专栏文章的赞扬。维吉尼亚预见到将要到来的称颂，感到有点嫉妒，因此也写了一封短信，说自己为她非常高兴和骄傲。凯瑟琳谦逊他说她受之有愧，在回信结尾时用有点古怪的带有结束一切的口吻写道：“不知你是否明白你来看望我意味着什么——或我多么想念你。你是我唯一愿意与之谈正事的妇女，再也不会有第二个人了，..别了，亲爱的朋友（我能这样称呼你吗？）。” 似乎凯瑟琳听说了什么她不喜欢的话，总而言之，这封信结束了她们的友谊，至少在凯这方面是如此。几个星期之后，维吉尼亚听说她病得很重，很孤独，又给她写过信，但却没有收到回信，因此感到伤心，后来告诉布雷特，说有些“丑恶的传闻”，使她确信这是凯瑟琳耍的手腕等等；但她仍很懊悔自己没有再尝试二，因为凯瑟琳给了她任何人都不能给的东西。 此时她已完成了《雅各的房间》，这本小说中使用了新的技巧，新的时间感和尝试，这也许得之于她同凯瑟琳的谈话，此书是她将来写作方式的新起点；小说还再三强调人们从来不能真正彼此了解。 凯瑟琳去世时，维吉尼亚在日记中写道，凯瑟琳的作品是“我唯一感到嫉妒的作品”。后来她告诉莫瑞尔夫人，凯瑟琳在世时，她因嫉妒，从不能阅读凯的书。无疑我们必须将此种嫉妒视作她的一种病态，而不能从道德方面去考虑。然而凯瑟琳只是羡慕维吉尼亚所拥有的东西（她的家，以及她在丈夫那儿得到的安全感），但是维吉尼亚却嫉妒凯瑟琳可能会取得的成就，也许这就引起了她或许感到的愧疚。 凯瑟琳去世后第三个星期维吉尼亚写的一则日记，描述了在过去十几天内笼罩在她心上的悲伤情绪，现在她又孤独了，没有对手：鹤立鸡群，然而孑然一人，她当然会继续写作，“但归于空虚”。