Chapter 29 12. First Love (2)

Fang's mood fluctuates endlessly, of course she is only a middle school student, how could she settle everything with me all at once?For a while she was very nice to me, for a while she said that I didn't understand her, and said let the past pass forever, and for a while she said goodbye and wished me even greater amazing achievements.We lost contact for more than a month, but we met again the following year when we visited the garden on May 1st in Beihai.The most impressive thing about this visit to the park was the Art Troupe of the Political Department of the Navy singing "The People's Navy Marches Forward", accompanied by a brass band.This song will always be associated with my youth and love.She called afterward and said I shouldn't have avoided seeing her like that.Well, what can I say besides singing and humming, besides reading classics of world novels, besides drinking a glass of beer with tears in my eyes?

Yes, first love is glass after glass of fine wine, with first love, everything becomes so intoxicating. After the Matrosov summer camp in 1952, Ruifang and the others participated in the cadre camp at Hongshan Pass organized by the Youth League Committee. I went to see it and left.When I left, what was broadcast on the construction site was the nice tenor solo "Singing and Singing Erlang Mountain". The solo voice in the tweeter swayed, and I gradually drifted away.Ruifang said that she looked at me from the background, as if moved.At this time, our exchanges finally had a considerable foundation.Back in Beijing, I also wrote a letter to those who participated in the middle school student cadre camp in my district, saying that when I went down the mountain, I felt full of autumn.Several people, including Ruifang, were all interested in my autumn mood.

In the winter of 1952, my only winter, I went to the Shichahai skating rink almost every Saturday night to skate.The ice rink at that time was actually very simple, but the first small shop had cold red fruit soup for sale.The color of red fruit soup in winter is a superhuman miracle.Second, the service department sharpens ice skates for customers free of charge, and the sparks splashed when sharpening are also fascinating.Third, the most important thing is that Soviet songs are played loudly from the tweeters on the ice rink. What moved me the most was "Who Knows Him" ​​sung by the Piatnisky Choir, a multi-part Russian female chorus , the voice of folk songs is thick and fiery, innocent and beautiful, which makes people cry:

In the sunset there is a young man, He glanced at me... Does anyone know him, Why is there a twinkle in your eyes, Why the blink of an eye? The last sentence is even more breathtaking. After 1953, I never skated again, and I never heard such a beautiful "Who Knows Him" ​​again. It wasn't until 52 years later that I heard an original Russian girl singing in the Cosmos Hotel in Moscow. .But everything has changed with the passage of time, the country remains the same, and the personnel and state affairs are completely different. I can't stop crying. During that period, I read Fryerman's, which described a boy who printed the name of a girl he liked on his chest by pasting it in the sun, and how he and his mother treated their father who had divorced from his mother. with his new wife.The content of the novel has nothing to do with my mood, but the novel’s delicate description of human psychology still hit my nerves. There are so many scenery and so many emotions between people, men and women, children and teenagers. .

I also read Turgenev.Its portrayal of the child's first love that turns out to be the father's lover I hate.The story of a child loving a big woman has long since ceased to suit me.But the lyrical monologue at the end of it "Youth, youth, you don't care about anything... Even sorrow comforts you..." I have recited it forever. Have I ever had a first love?My first love is Fang.My new wife is Fang.My wife who is about to marry me now is Fang.However, the days of the Youth League Committee were still my first love. Later, from 1955 to 1956, we stopped communicating for a year, which was the end of our first love.First love is the best.It is still largely true that first loves often don't work out.It wasn’t until the summer of 1956 that we started a real young love affair. The reunion in the summer of 1956 made me feel like I was struck by lightning, an almost transcendental force, an existence that is with life or more solemn than life It is worth cherishing and indispensable.And all indiscretion, all confusion, all ignorance are gone forever. I was watching the ballet "Swan Lake" in Moscow in 2004. I saw the prince was bewildered by the black swan, and I almost forgot the moment when the white swan Odette was about to appear. A window appeared on the background of the stage, which was the rush of the white swan. The dance, which brought back memories of the past, brought tears to my eyes.There are indeed such encounters, such trials, such hurdles, and such traps in life.We can all fall into a trap and be lost forever.I know more than one such story.

In my life, I often make mistakes, often get tricked, and often believe in credulity, which causes many embarrassments.But after all, I am kind-hearted. I have never intentionally harmed or harmed others, and I have been blessed because I have not hurt my morals. I have not fallen into a sea of ​​suffering in matters related to lifelong love and marriage. Our mutual choice in 1956 is still the same as when we first fell in love, and we will always be like this.This helped me survive many adventures.Such luck does not come to everyone.