Chapter 7 5. Shedding tears for Sakyamuni

When I was in elementary school, three subjects of Chinese, arithmetic, and general knowledge were introduced in the lower grades, while in the upper grades, the general knowledge class was canceled and three courses of history, geography, and nature were added. In fact, it was an expansion of the general knowledge class.I have almost forgotten what I learned in all these lessons, but two lessons have stuck in my memory, and they have to do with death. The general knowledge class seems to be taught by different teachers according to the content. The one who teaches the general knowledge of physiology and hygiene is an older female teacher, who looks and speaks rather vulgarly, and always talks about things that really belong to the common sense of ordinary people in class.For example, she once told us that the best defense against colds was to regularly immerse your head in cold water, which sounded utterly astonishing to me at the time.It's not that kind of stuff that impresses me, though, and doesn't really have anything to do with her teaching.In one class, she hung a diagram of human anatomy on the blackboard. I don't remember what she explained, but I do remember the shock it gave me.From this picture, I seem to have discovered that the reason why people will die in the end is that the body is full of these disgusting and ugly internal organs.I said to myself: My body must not be in such a mess, but bright, so I will not die.This means that at that time I have realized that I will die too, and I am suffering from it, so I have to find reasons to resist.

Another class that is unforgettable to me is a history class. A male teacher told us the life of Sakyamuni, the founder of Buddhism.As I listened, a vivid picture appeared before my eyes.For some reason, I imagined Buddha as a boy about my own age, troubled by death just like me.I saw him run away from home with this distress, in search of a paradise that would free one from death.I also saw him lying on the grass, thinking hard, and finally came to his senses, resolutely abandoning all the joys of the world.After this class, the same scene kept replaying in my mind, I felt like a boy like Shakyamuni, I had unparalleled sympathy and understanding for him, deeply unable to be contemporaries and acquaintances with him And regret.Often in such daydreams, I find tears welling up in my eyes.

It now appears that thinking about death had been planted in my childhood.There is nothing special about this. I often observe that children as young as four or five years old will express confusion, fear and concern about death.No matter how careful the adults are, it is impossible to hide this matter from the children for a long time. The children can always understand the horror of this matter from the increasing information, from the daily language, and even from the taboo attitude of the adults. nature.He may not say it, but the earthquake of the heart is still happening quietly under the surface.This is exactly what happened to me back then.When my daughter was four years old, she was constantly asking questions about where she was before she was born, what happened to her when she died, why time passed, and repeatedly stated that she didn't want to grow up.Faced with this kind of problem, the usual way for adults is to ignore it, block it back and tell children not to think about it, and give a simple answer, which must be a lie.In my opinion, all three approaches are the worst.What I do is to encourage the child and praise her for asking such a great question, even my father can't answer it, so my father should think about it.Actually, I'm telling the truth, because the question is really good, and I really can't answer it.Of course, you might as well discuss with her and come up with some possible answers, but you must not draw conclusions.There is no need to worry that children will be caught in some painful thoughts, no, children are children after all, and the vigorous growth of life makes them never lose their minds. Their excitement is easy to shift, and life is still full of fun. .That is true of my daughter now, and it must have been true of myself back then.There is certainly nothing wrong with teaching children from an early age to be courageous and open to life's biggest and most bewildering questions, helping to grow in their souls a fundamental honesty.