Chapter 18 Chapter 2 Heaven and Earth

The saddest thing in this world is farewell.It is said that joys and sorrows, birth, old age, sickness and death are inevitable experiences in life, but the process is often unexpected.Before the disaster strikes, there is no hint, it only takes an instant for landslides and landslides, and there is only a thin line between life and death.The way back is the way back. Everyone, wherever they come from, must go back there.The length of time is beyond one's control. Human life is like flowers on a branch, some fall early and some fall late. If you love someone, when you are thirsty, hand her a glass of boiled water; when the wind blows, add a light shirt for her; when you are lonely, give her a gentle embrace; She lives and dies by herself.Nalan locked himself in the house for seven days and seven nights, barely eating except drinking water.With deep guilt in his heart, they didn't get together more or less in the past three years.Even when they got together, it was Yimei who gave him warmth, but as a man, he paid too little.Now, God has deprived him of all opportunities for redemption, even for such simple things as pouring a glass of boiled water and adding a piece of clothing, there is no chance anymore.

He always thought she would come back, because there was still her fragrant breath in the room.Her strings were polished to a bright spot without any dust.On the table, there are still mandarin ducks that she has not finished embroidering. She is a kind woman and will not bear to let the mandarin ducks lose their company.All of this is his wishful thinking, and the painful self-deception can't change anything, it only makes him fall into a cycle of sadness.When parting before, he could still see her in his dream, even though it hurt even to breathe in the dream.But now, he didn't even have a dream, the lonely shadow in the cold window, only the moon accompanied him to sleep alone.

Evening makeup is about to stop, and the eyebrows are painted in the mirror.The promise is clear, and the rain and the smoke are both invincible. Candles flickering, just about to wake up from the cold.Don't think about it, don't sleep alone. Where are the catkins and flowers, and the layers of ice and snow are devastated.Sparse tree just before dawn cold.Love him, Mingyue is good, haggard is also related. Nalan hoped that the woman who was obsessed with love could return in her soul.But no one will build a bridge between humans for them.That ethereal soul cannot wade in to comfort his loneliness.And Nalan didn't have the courage to go to Qiongbi and go to Huangquan to chase after her.Only when he saw the crescent moon, did he dare to tell himself that in the heaven and earth, he and her were really separated forever.She is a brilliant star among the many stars in the sky, and she will always have a pair of eyes looking at him.He is an ordinary plant among the many plants in the world, and he does not know how to find her.

The death of his beloved wife made him feel so weak.A few years ago, the departure of Qingmei's cousin made him feel a emptiness in which his heart had been gouged out, and the pain still recurs from time to time.But this time, he didn't even have the strength to hurt, his body was like floating clouds, his heart was like flying catkins, and his breath was like gossamer, that's how he felt.Nalan finally understood that people come to this world to pay off their debts, and after paying off the debts that should be paid off, they will go back.Any retention and reluctance will only add to the sadness.Just like a fallen leaf, who can rejuvenate, but when the leaf falls, there will be spring back. When a person dies, he will never return.

Nalan was overwhelmed by this unpredictable death. He tried hard to be strong and not to cry, but he was still sick.The cold disease took root in his life, and if there was a little trouble, it would suddenly attack.Every time the attack was ferocious, and there was no room for change. This day bound by fate made him despair.Lying on the hospital bed, he felt like a fish short of water, exiled on the beach, exposed to the sun, mottled scales, almost dry, but still holding the last breath.Even he himself didn't know, for whom he worked so hard. The cold air was overwhelming, and the pain was like a cone. In a trance, Nalan only felt that there were many people around him, rushing in and out.Someone clenched his hand, tears fell on his face, there was crying, and someone even heard calling for his soul.Nalan Mingzhu visited famous doctors for Rong Ruo, and the prescriptions they prescribed could only cure his cold disease, but not his heart disease.In desperation, Rong Ruo's mother invited a wizard for him, and practiced magic in the garden of Mingfu to exorcise ghosts and summon souls.

When people are vulnerable and desperate, they often seek a kind of sustenance. Nalan Mansion, with its wealth, is also helpless in the face of death and disease.Not to mention Nalan, the amorous Emperor Shunzhi back then was devastated by the death of Concubine Dong E, and he said sadly: Why did I fall into the emperor's house as a monk before the Buddha.He took off the dragon robe, put on the monk's robe, discarded the jade seal, picked up the wooden fish, put down the memorial, and read the scriptures.Such determination is because he sees through the worldly affairs, only the Buddha can give him real stability, allowing him to be enlightened and detached in the muddy world.His destination has always been a mystery. Some people say that he was tied down by the people all the time, failed to become a monk, returned to the palace, and died of smallpox.Death is also a kind of relief for him, no one can stop him from leaving.Some people also said that it was the Buddha who enlightened him, and he was finally able to cast aside the country and become a monk in an ancient temple deep in the mountains, and he got his wish.

Life is originally a game of chess, with too many Zen principles and mysteries in it. Those who are addicted to the chessboard don't know whether to be sad or happy, whether to persevere or give up.Is there still time to make up for the mistakes you have made?If falling in love is also a sin, is it still worthy of forgiveness?Even if you use all the world as a bargaining chip, you may not be the winner.Nalan understands that although he and his beloved wife are destined to meet by marriage, they cannot depend on each other for life and death after all.Even his own fate is a mystery, and no one can guess the final answer.

The death of his beloved wife and the torment of illness made Nalan despair.He decided to give up on himself and end this tragic life.Perhaps only in this way can the sadness no longer spread and the suffering can be stopped.He is a sentimental person, and he can't stop the joys and sorrows in his life. Even if he guesses the answer correctly, there will be new puzzles.He has an honorable status, but he is no more noble than a commoner. He is full of talents, but he is no more proud than a speck of dust.For many years, I have always regarded wandering as my destination and loneliness as my confidant.When the pain caused by the cold disease penetrated into the bone marrow, he clenched his lips and said: This kind of life, don't worry about it.

Cold, as cold as falling into an ice cellar, a piece of thousand-year-old ice, what should be used to melt it and give it warmth.Nalan gave up on himself, the imperial doctor was helpless, and Nalan Mingzhu and his wife resigned to their fate.In the most desperate time, there was such a person who saved him.Maybe it's because the love is not over, maybe it's because the life should not end.Nalan lay drowsy in a warm embrace, he felt hot tears dripping down his face, and felt his frozen body gradually melt away in the warmth.There were warm and soft lips, which slowly pressed against his cold lips, allowing him to continue his breath that was about to stop.

Nalan thought that his soul had gone out of his body. When he opened his eyes, he saw the long-lost beauty.The green plum cousin he once dreamed of was by his side at this moment.He was lying in her warm embrace, with his head pressed against her chest, and such warmth made his pain go away.He thought it was in a dream, but it was really a skin-to-skin kiss. He could smell her breath, see the tears in the corners of her eyes, and see her surprise.Nalan knew that he was still alive, snuggling in the arms of his cousin Qingmei.It was her who drove away the cold disease in his body with warmth, and it was her who snatched him back from the hand of death.

Nalan understood that there were still people in this world who cared about him so deeply.He can't die, he has unfinished predestined relationship and unfinished responsibilities, so when Cousin Qingmei arrives, he will wake up.Even so, their stories are sad after all, like falling flowers and flowing water, destined but not divided.After today, they have to drift along their respective life trajectories again, and it may be hopeless to meet again in this life.It is not easy for Qingmei to go out of the palace once, she asked the emperor for an order, telling her that she has a deep relationship with Nalan's cousins.Only because Nalan's life was at stake, and Kangxi was ready to play, there was such a chance of reunion. Waking up like a dream again, it was Qingmei who brought him back from the cliff of death to the world.Nalan even thought that if he could die in her arms and let her bury him with her own hands, he would be willing.The encounter between them was not accidental, but it was still like the end of the autumn banquet, a little cold and bleak.A brief meeting will bring about a long parting; meager happiness will bring about deep sorrow.Whether it's worth it or not, it's really enough to have such a reunion.