Chapter 13 "I want to go to the Spring Festival Gala"

"I want to go to the Spring Festival Gala" is a program I wrote the year before last.At first it was a short segment of a few minutes.Later, it developed more and more, talked more and more, and many things were also created on stage.And it has become more and more perfect. Up to now, this program has also become one of the programs in the My Word series, and many people know this program. ("I Want to Struggle", "I Want to Anti-Three Customs", "My Life") We said earlier that the Spring Festival Gala has many good things, but it does have many imperfections, including problems with directors and actors.We also do understand that some situations are traumatic for some actors.Many actors start rehearsing in June, and on the 29th of the Chinese New Year, even at the live broadcast, the show starts, and you may be notified suddenly that your show has been canceled or blocked.Although I haven't experienced this kind of situation yet, when we put ourselves in the shoes of those actors, we really wanted to die.I spent half a year rehearsing, rehearsing, and revising for a program, and it was finally removed.This hurts too much.This is a fatal blow to the actor.Some are understandable, but some are also difficult to understand.Some of them are man-made things, so we took these known materials and used cross talk. We satirized it a little bit. Judging from the theater effect, the audience liked this show very much, which shows that our starting point is correct. .This has also become the repertoire of our Deyun Society.

Guo: I have always had no confidence in myself, and I said it in front of people in my hometown; Wang: Speak from your heart. Guo: I was not good at cross talk since I was in elementary school. A group of children came on stage to perform, and they all said well. When they went out, they applauded, but when I came to my place, I went up and down. I went out, and as soon as I went out, they left as soon as I poked my head. Wang: Oh. Guo: Later, the head of the group got anxious and you didn't go up. You stayed behind, stayed behind, and moved tables and inspected the venue to do this.

Wang: Yes. Guo: Hey, you see, if I don't go, some people will come to the backstage. Wang: Oh. Guo: Why not let Guo Degang go, my popsicle will melt if he doesn't go. Wang: Hahahaha. Guo: Everyone went out to buy popsicles when I was on stage. Wang: Hehehe. Guo: When I grew up slowly, I really hoped to get better, but it didn’t work. Wang: What? Guo: Performing with drum music, you can’t do better than a big drum singer, Wang: You see. Guo: People put flower baskets on the drummers, but we don’t even have wreaths here.He gritted his teeth, stomped his feet, and quit. Wang: Oh.

Guo: Why don't I eat? Wang: Exactly. Guo: Is it right?go do something else, Wang: Hey. Guo: Working with the guy who shoots commercials and TV dramas, the circle is quite chaotic.Especially it is not easy to be in the TV drama and film industry, I hate them very much, there are too few female directors. Wang: Yes. Guo: Later, when I went to shoot commercials, people advised me, you, you can’t act in TV dramas, and after a few months, you just make a living and don’t make any money. Count the people in China, and these are the only people who make money. Don’t think Do film and television to make money, confused!

Wang: Yes. Guo: Go shoot commercials, shoot commercials, Wang: Advertising. Guo: Getting tens of thousands of dollars in three to five days is like playing games. Wang: So easy. Guo: I said who is looking for me, I am looking for you, do you see, the train tickets are here, Wang: Oh. Guo: Hurry up, you, Beijing Film Studio puts on makeup, and after putting on makeup, take the ticket to Changchun, the number one male, and the number one advertising male.I said thank you, thank you so much.I went to Beiying to find a makeup artist, and I said that my place is a bit darker, so you can make it whiter for me.Enen, what a waste of you!

Wang: Huh? Guo: Take that black oil paint and apply it to me. Wang: So black? Guo: Put me in a black padded jacket and black padded trousers. Wang: Huh! Guo: Holding the train ticket and boarding the train, there is no one who does not look at me when I get on the train. Whoever looks at me is puzzled. Wang: fresh. Guo: There is a prisoner in a carriage, who is hanging here with shackles and handcuffs. Wang: Whoops! Guo: Four armed policemen held him with guns in their hands. This man’s life is over when he’s done. He’s downcast. I lived here. When he looked at me, he found confidence. Have you seen it?When I arrived in Changchun, I looked for the crew, and I said that the director is here, I am the number one male, yes, you are the number one male, ready to start, I am waiting for you.

Wang: Good. Guo: What do I mean by female number one?In that cage.Behold, an orangutan!Did I say it bites?Don't bite, circus ones. Wang: Oh. Guo: What, what advertisement?Eight-treasure porridge!After a while it comes out, you put your arms around it, open a can, pour it in, and say "it's delicious", and it's over!Four thousand dollars. Wang: Hey. Guo: It earns more than talking about cross talk. Wang: Exactly. Guo: Great, come on, I can't wait any longer.I really can’t wait anymore, hurry up, start, start, start, the orangutan is released, hugging, I am holding the eight-treasure porridge, and the director shouts "Start!" It is faster than my hand,

Wang: Huh? Guo: The orangutan snatched it up, and Te'er... hugged my shoulders, gurgling, gurgling, and poured it down for me, and he even pointed at the camera like that!I said the director is coming back, the director is happy, ah!Anyone can pour anyone! Wang: Cough. Guo: Later, the advertisement was broadcast, and the audience called, "Which one is the orangutan and which one is the human?" Wang: Hahahaha! Guo: Go back with 4,000 yuan, back to Beijing.When I arrived in Beijing, I said when will it be over? When will it be a stop? Wang: Ah. Guo: Come to a friend, "You, you know, do you want to be popular, what do you do?" I would talk about cross talk, and I said they would not take me to play.The show doesn't take me, and the video doesn't take me either.

Wang: Yes. Guo: When will you come out and go to the Spring Festival Gala! Wang: Hey. Guo: During the Spring Festival Gala, you will become popular overnight. Wang: Exactly. Guo: I said I didn't know him.I know, I know, I know the director, you pay 5,000 yuan, and I will introduce you to him.I only had 4,000 yuan, and I used the money to call the rent, and 500 yuan to buy instant noodles.Here you are, you deserve me, get four thousand.Take four thousand and take me to see the director. Wang: Oh, that's fine. Guo: I saw it, it's fake! Wang: How is it fake? Guo: Liar!Not even a beard, you know, no beard!

Wang: Directors have to have big beards? Guo: My friend said, "Don't talk nonsense, the bearded man has been arrested, you know." Wang: Hahahaha. Guo: Big beards are not popular now, you know? Wang: Yes. Guo: That’s right, you know.Oh, good director!Ah, what's the matter with you, just talk about this.The arrangements are full, so it's your turn. Wang: Exactly. Guo: You go ahead and do the work, do the cleaning, deliver the boxed lunches, come and walk the dog for me!You see, how wicked it is to let him walk the dog! Wang: Let’s count it as theater affairs. Guo: Let him walk the dog every day, just this broken dog, stop every step, stop every step,

Wang: Yo. Guo: I went to the watch shop. Let me take a look at this. What's going on?It doesn't matter, just wipe off the sludge and it will be fine. Wang: Cough. Guo: It’s fixed. The director is overjoyed. Heh, this dog has not been fixed for a long time. You fix it. You are my confidant, so you can stay here. Wang: Good. Guo: Waiting every day, which job I can do, which job I can do.Hey, there is a cross talk with a group of 400 people, I can come. Wang: A big cross talk with four hundred people. Guo: There are 400 people in this group of comic actors, Wang: Oh, Guo: Crosstalk talkers from all over the country gather there, 400 people, talking about cross talk.The stage set up, this side of the rockery, this side of the mountain stream, this side of the swimming pool, first get on the helicopter, first throw