Chapter 8 Chapter 8 Jade Pot of Light

When Wen Shichu came again, I went to mow the grass, but I didn't run into him.When I came back, the courtyard was full of setting sun, and I saw Huanbi and Jinxi looking at each other, standing at the table with embarrassing expressions. Huanbi came up to help me pat the weeds off my body.I wondered, "What's the matter standing there like this?" Jinxi glanced at Huanbi, moved her lips, after all, she still didn't say anything, it was Huanbi who said, "Master Wen is here, and this time he brought something." As for what to give, she didn't say anything, she just pouted and showed me the table.

I adjusted my clothes a little, and I was stunned after just one glance.On the dilapidated table, there was a white jade pot made with exquisite workmanship, exquisite and translucent, as thin as paper, just about the size of the palm of your hand, very delicate and lovely.At that time, the slanting light like gold diffused from the window panes and shone on the jade pot, the light turned infinitely bright and clear. I was puzzled for a moment, and said, "Why did he send such a valuable thing?" Huanbi sighed, and said helplessly, "Miss, you'll know when you open it."

I opened it as I said, and couldn't help gasping for air. There was nothing else in the pot, only a few slices of pears, cut and peeled, cut into heart shapes, and the color was pure and pure. I was startled, and there was a bang in my head, he actually meant that. Huanbi twisted her belt, bit her lip and looked at me.Jinxi looked complicated, and stood beside me and said softly: "A piece of ice is in the jade pot. How will the lady respond to Mrs. Wen's thoughts?" My chest felt hot, my breath almost reached my throat, and I slapped my palm on the table.The table was worn out, and even though I was not strong enough, I was so shocked that I jumped.

Huanbi was taken aback, and hurriedly looked at my hands, persuading: "Miss, be careful that your hands hurt." Jinxi looked at me, and Wen Yan said to Huanbi: "My lady is feeling bad, so she must be short of breath." Although Jinxi was talking to Huanbi, I didn't understand the deep meaning in the words, so she calmed down, smiled and said, "I'm just too impatient. Now that I'm here, I'm not as calm as before." Only then did Jinxi bring up a cup of tea, and said gently: "If the lady is willing, she can accept it. But the servant girl really doesn't want to look at the way the lady looks. Mr. Wen is too reckless to come here."

Huanbi said from the side: "No wonder Miss is angry, Miss is practicing, how can she bear such a thing. And all these years, he should always understand how Miss treats him." I sat down with my knees tucked in a sense of loss, and wondered for a while: "Why is he always so ignorant, so inappropriate. I have already rejected his affection for me before entering the palace. I didn't want it before, and I don't want it now. I just don't want it. Seeing him as an old brother and old friend, why doesn't he always understand?" Huanbi was also worried, and said: "Now it's not easy to reject him directly. The Obscure Moon Empress and Shen Jieyu in the palace cannot do without his care. We are already alone, and we will lose our wings again." Miss? You have to think about it carefully." She thought for a moment, and then said: "Master Wen actually takes care of us a lot."

I just tilted my head and said lightly: "He really takes good care of me, but I really don't like him." Jinxi just stood with her hands down, without showing any expression, "Master Wen's affection is touching, and such a man is indeed rare." I didn't want Jinxi to say that, so I couldn't help but look back at her.Huanbi was also slightly taken aback. The three of them just didn't speak, and each had their own thoughts. Huanbi walked up to me, leaned against me by the bed, looked sad and gentle, and whispered softly: "Actually, think about it again, Mr. Wen and Miss have known each other since childhood, and the relationship between Miss and Miss is naturally different. That day Miss Before entering the palace for the draft, Mrs. Wen personally came to express his love to Miss for many years, and he was willing to marry Miss. Miss is very high-minded, so naturally her eyes would not stay on Mrs. Wen. But things are changing now, Miss has experienced many years of turmoil in the palace, the emperor You already know that your love is unreliable, so now that there is someone who is willing to treat you sincerely, and we know each other well, why don't you make another plan, Miss. It doesn't matter if you think about it for a few more years, there is no need to reject him so straightforwardly Ah." Seeing that I just hugged my knees silently, she slowed down her voice to persuade: "Although Master Wen is impatient and doesn't know how to choose the time, his heart for Miss has been the same for many years. Moreover, he is quite knowledgeable in medicine and has some family background. If you want to help the young lady secretly, or help the young lady get out of the wrong place, it's not a very embarrassing thing."

I may not listen to her persuasion.And life here is indeed hard and difficult. I just asked, "What else did he say when he came?" Jinxi's words were cold and clear: "Master Wen said to come back for a visit in three days." The desolate fragrant grass in the distance, the hidden mountains in the distance, the faint red glow, the wind is soft and soft, and the touch with a bit of cold touches the face.The troubles in this world can't be hidden anywhere. The sky gradually darkened, as if there were countless crow wings densely covering the sky, overlapping one after another.I just felt tired and bored, closed my eyes, and said lightly: "You guys go out, I will think about it myself."

In these three days, I just went as usual and didn't mention anything about the jade pot. I put the jade pot carefully in the pillow side cabinet and wiped it carefully with a fine cloth every day.When Huanbi saw me like this, she always pinched eyes with Jinxi and smiled, and Jinxi only smiled back lightly and politely. In the afternoon three days later, I deliberately didn't go out to do anything, but sent Huanbi out. Wen Shichu came as he said, the room had already been cleaned so that the windows were bright and clean, a bunch of newly bloomed pear blossoms were in white in the bottle, like a snowy jade tree, the refreshing and sweet smell made people feel extra warm.

I had already asked Jinxi to make tea, and I just sat quietly waiting for him to come. Wen Shichu laughed before entering the door, "Sister Huan looks very good today, and her face is much rosier." Maybe it was my good looks that infected him, and his original uneasiness calmed down a little, and he sat down to drink tea with me and talked slowly.After chatting about some domestic gossip, I carefully took out the jade pot and put it between me and him. Jade pots are indeed very beautiful and delicate.I said softly, "If I remember correctly, Brother Shichu is already twenty-five years old."

His joy was revealed by my memory, his brows were light and gentle, and he said with a smile: "Sister Huan has the best memory, I am indeed twenty-five years old." I was half sighing, half sighing, "Twenty-five years old, if you live in an ordinary family, you will probably have a group of wives and concubines, and a couple of children. Uncle Wen must have worried about your marriage a few years ago." He hesitated to speak, but only smiled and said: "If you don't marry the one you love, you will never marry the one you love." I nodded and said: "Brother Shichu is right. Marrying a wife and virtue, marrying a concubine and sex. But regardless of wives and concubines, you must like yourself, otherwise it is not only difficult to be a husband and wife in this life, but also very boring. So Shichu Brother, let's be later."

Wen Shichu was a little embarrassed, but he also took it seriously, and said: "I am just an ordinary family of officials, and it doesn't matter later. No more than the supreme king, marriage is closely related to the world, and it is closely related to the community. At the age of thirteen or fourteen, we will get married. Besides, the palace Among them, that King Qinghe is twenty-three years old, he doesn't want to marry his concubine, and even the queen mother can't do anything about him..." Before he finished speaking, I already felt stabbed.Seeing my slightly gloomy expression, he knew that the emperor had said something I didn't like to hear, so he couldn't help but look ashamed, and hurriedly said: "I didn't mean it." I didn't realize it, and smiled and said: "King Qinghe's vision is quite high. I don't know what kind of woman is worthy of him. It's interesting to think about it." Seeing that I was fine, he felt a little relieved, and remained silent for a while.I opened my lips and said, "Brother Shichu, do you still remember the first time you saw me?" His expression calmed down gently, "Why don't you remember? I will always remember that you were only ten years old at that time. Brother Zhen took you to go boating on the lake with his master on his back after school. It just so happened that I was running a horse on that day. When I came out, I saw you combing your hair and double maids, standing on the bow of the boat with a lotus in your arms, singing a song. Later, when you saw me, you were not afraid of life, and even peeled lotus seeds for me to eat." I smiled slightly, looking back at the funny things in my childhood, they are extremely precious and beautiful.In those carefree years, how could I have known and predicted that the road ahead would be so hard and difficult, and it was so difficult that there was no way to go, and I had to continue to struggle and move on. Because the sweetness in the past made the later life bitter like a lotus heart, and I had to swallow them raw... I sang in a low voice: "Ask the lotus root, how much silk is there? Who is the lotus heart suffering for? The two flowers ask each other tenderly..." But I forgot the lyrics, and I couldn't sing any more, so I had to laugh: "I really don't want to. Woke up." Wen Shichu interjected: "The next sentence is also the last sentence—it's just the children of the old days." I caressed my cheek embarrassingly, and said with a faint smile: "No wonder I have to forget..." I lowered my voice, with a little helplessness in my words, and said sadly: "We are not the children of the old days, the songs of the old days I will forget about it." I turned around, pushed the jade pot in front of him, and said solemnly, "I have a heart of ice in the jade pot. Zhen Huan is ashamed that she can't bear such a heavy affection, please take it back." Wen Shichu's expression changed, he hurriedly took a sip of tea to calm himself down, and said slowly: "This jade pot is a treasure handed down from my family. My father once told me that I must give it to the person I love. I didn't have the opportunity to give it to you before. Now I sincerely beg you to accept this jade pot." I shook my head and said softly: "This jade pot is so precious, you should give it to the person you love. It's a pity, Brother Shichu, you are not my beloved, so I can't bear this jade pot, even if you force me to accept it." Now, as far as this jade pot is concerned, it has been let down." Wen Shichu was speechless, his expression froze, like a green leaf wrapped in the first autumn frost, frustrated and depressed, "Sister Huan, you always refuse to accept me. It used to be, and it is still now." I thought for a while and said, "Brother Shichu, with all due respect, you always remember things from your childhood. What you like in your heart may be the innocent and gentle me before entering the palace, not the me now. Now I am very different from before, so why are you so obsessed with it?" He raised his head suddenly, with a burning light in his eyes, he leaned forward hastily, and said in a hoarse voice: "Sister Huan, I must tell you, my heart for you has always been the same." His voice Slightly lowered, but still sincere, "Not only in the palace but also outside." I listened to him quietly, and suddenly smiled silently.I smiled so peacefully, in the tranquility there was almost invisible confidence and desolation, as if the first layer of frost in winter had fallen silently, pale and dazed. "Do you still remember Cao Qinmo?" I asked abruptly. "Yes." Wen Shichu's expression darkened suddenly, and he lowered his hands, "Of course I remember." He murmured, "Why don't you remember?" I slowly closed my eyes, and said quietly: "Yes! The former concubine Xiang, the biological mother of Emperor Wen Yi, chased after Concubine Xiang." I opened my eyes suddenly, and said sharply: "How did Concubine Xiang die that day? , you and I know it perfectly!" Wen Shichu's expression was gloomy, and the cold sweat on his forehead squeezed out layer by layer, like cold rain on the river, cold and cold.For a moment, he sighed as if to comfort himself: "I've been brooding over this matter for a long time. When I think about it, I always feel uneasy day and night. It's also my fault. Fortunately, Empress Wenyi now has Concubine Duan who takes good care of her." , Concubine Xiang died quite beautifully. I feel a little relieved. All I can do now is to do my best to look after the body of Empress Wenyi, which can be regarded as a little redemption..." I interrupted him coldly, "That's not what I want to say. You and I grew up together, and we experienced a lot of things together in the palace. You are very clear about my good and bad. Even Cao Xiang The concubine's death, you are unwilling, I'm afraid you are also blaming me in your heart...isn't it?" He was tongue-tied and couldn't speak for a moment, he just said in a daze: "This...I..." I frowned slightly, and said quietly: "Once Murong Shilan dies, the only thing I have to deal with is Cao Qinmo. But she is such a cautious person, it is almost impossible to create a chance for her to slip up and drown or get into an accident. Fabricating a crime for her will only make her come back to murder me. Since the assassination is not possible, I can only use medicine. You have always been well-known in the Imperial Hospital, you are excellent in medicine, and you are willing to pity the weak and the poor. Don't worry. What's more, the medicine we gave her is just to calm her mind, make her nightmare worse, and then make her heart weak, and then kill her silently." I glanced at him, "It's hard for you gone." Wen Shichu looked at me deeply, and said, "For you, I'm always willing." I was quite moved, nodded slightly and said: "You have always been kind-hearted, and you never wanted to commit murder. You hesitated for a long time at the beginning. If it wasn't for helping me, how could you be willing... Now that I think about it, I also feel that at that time Tai is very careful. It's just that she is in her position, if you don't kill people, people will kill you, and Concubine Xiang is such a smart and shrewd person, she knows a lot about me, I definitely can't tolerate her." Wen Shichu's lips were slightly pursed, showing a bit of firmness.He is actually a good-looking man, safe and loyal.He comforted softly: "Sister Huan, you are always kind, but that time you were a little too cruel." "Really? Then killing Mrs. Yu and Concubine Hua, I'm not cruel?" I softened my tone and said gently: "Whether I am kind or cruel, you can see it. Let's do it like this." Familiarity, knowing each other, can be regarded as being close. But when it comes to the relationship between a man and a woman, who would not want to show him only the best side and hide all the bad ones. But you know too many of my secrets Now, if I am with you, I will only feel uncomfortable. You may not forget my faults, so what good is it if we meet each other day and night like this, why bother embarrassing each other like this. " Wen Shichu was greatly shocked, he bowed his head, his eyebrows curled up like silkworms.He tightly grasped his left hand with his right hand, and pressed hard, with blood-red marks appearing.He restrained and said: "I am a little imperial doctor, in your eyes, I am always bad, always a useless person." I said softly: "I naturally know how good you are. If you are an imperial physician, you are young and promising, with excellent medical skills, and are highly regarded by the emperor; if you are a husband, you will definitely be a good husband, cherish your wife, and take care of you in every possible way." It's a pity, Brother Shichu, for example, when drinking tea, I like the flavor of 'Xueding Hancui', but no matter how good and delicious Pu'er is, I just don't like it. Can it be said that Pu'er is not good? It's just that everyone has different preferences. " He muttered to himself, "You mean, I am that cup of Pu'er in your heart." I said in a low voice: "Brother Shichu, you are very good, but unfortunately I am not blessed, and I have no way to like you." I held the jade pot and said, "A piece of ice is in the jade pot. This friendship, I love you." I can’t take it anymore. But relatives and friends in Luoyang are like asking each other, a heart of ice is in the jade pot, but I fully accept it. I will always regard you as a relative and friend in my heart, and always will.” His lips had unfull curves that were caused by enduring misery, filled with sorrow and a touch of tenderness: "Treat me as a relative or a friend? It's a pity that it's not what I want." I also looked at each other sadly, "Brother Shichu, in this world, we never really got what we want. I have struggled in the palace for many years, but I just want to get one part of sincerity and two parts of peace, but even this is not enough." Yes, it has fallen to where it is today.” Seeing that I was sad, he persuaded me: "Although you have reached the current situation, it is fortunate that you are free after leaving the palace." I felt as sad as if I was being held tightly by one hand, but I didn't want to cry in front of Wen Shichu, and said with all my might: "Although I left the harem, I can't forget the sufferings my father and brother have suffered. My sisters and The daughters are all in the palace, and the current ninety-five supreme is their husband, father and master. Even if I am a free body outside the palace, how can I ever forget the things of those years, and I will never forget them in my life. Then even if my body is free, my heart is not free, and I suffer every day.” He wanted to comfort him, so he wanted to reach out, but I quickly retracted my hand, his expression was a little embarrassed, and he quickly covered it up, so he could only say: "Sister Huan, don't be sad." I turned my head away and tried my best to hold back the tears that were about to fall in my eyes, "The emperor has treated me for the past few years...Brother Shichu, I am not afraid to tell you that I have given up on the relationship between men and women. So what do you say to me?" , are useless. Now, no matter how hard or difficult, I just want to live in the Ganlu Temple and recite the scriptures to calm my heart." I calmed down and said: "I know you have a way to let me leave Here, but away from here, where can I go. My father and brother are far away in the north of Sichuan and Lingnan. Come visit me often." Wen Shichu was speechless for a long time, and said: "Isn't it enough to come to see you often?" I nodded slightly, "You have come here too many times, I'm afraid the palace will know about it. I don't know how many troubles will arise. Why bother?" He closed his eyes forcefully, took a breath for a moment, and said, "Are you afraid of hurting Shen Jieyu and Miyuki?" I nodded vigorously: "To be honest, they are the only people I can care about, care for, and get in front of me." I looked at him firmly, "You promised me that you will take good care of them and do your best. Then You can't do anything for anyone that might hurt them, this is what you promised me personally. Brother Shichu, since you are kind to me, will you count what I said? " He was tongue-tied, and after a while his expression turned serious, and he said, "I promise you, I will do it naturally." My heart slowly let go, and I let out a deep breath. The melancholy and disappointment in his eyes were as dense as the fog in early winter, and he was confused, with heavy shadows around his brows and eyes. He whispered sadly and hoped: "Actually, you can tell me to wait for you for a few years, and wait slowly like this." It doesn't matter for a lifetime, why do you have to reject me like this, so cruel and resolute, don't let me have a little hope?" The sadness in his words infected my mood, I was startled, my heart was sad, but I refused to show it on my face, I just said quietly: "If I give you hope in vain, I will only make you wait in vain "Brother Shichu, you know that I never say anything against my will. If I lie to you and delay you, I can't feel at ease." He was disappointed for a long time.The bright sky outside the window fell on him, as if it was shining on a corner that was always dark, and it couldn't be illuminated no matter what.Although he was disappointed, he tried his best to calm down and said: "Do you still remember that when we first met, you peeled a lot of lotus seeds for me to eat. You were still young at that time, and you didn't know that you had to pick out the lotus heart when eating lotus seeds , I really feel bitter after eating one by one, and I can’t even swallow it. But because you peeled it to me, I will eat it no matter how bitter it is. No matter how sad or difficult it is to accept, I will accept and respect your wishes." I just felt my heart relax, and I slowed down my tone, and said: "You always feel sorry for me working hard here. But if I am with someone I don't like to avoid hard life, I am not such a person. This One point, brother Shichu must have understood. Therefore, if you treat me as well as the person I love, it will only be a waste of emotion and embarrass me. So in this life, I will respect you as a brother and a friend, and repay you You treat me well in every way." I spoke softly like spring wind turning into rain, but he could weigh the weight of the words.I treat him so politely, but I can't give him half hope. He was speechless for a long time, just nodded, got up and left, and said with a wry smile: "Sister Huan, you always tell me that there is nothing I can do about you. But since you have made it so clear today, I... will never call you again. You are in trouble." I put the jade pot in front of him, carefully rewrapped it for him, and said softly: "Put it away carefully, and I will definitely give it to a woman who loves you as much as I do. Don't show it to others so easily." He stared blankly at the jade pot, unable to stretch out his hand, sighed, and said melancholy: "If you don't want to accept it, who else will I give it to?" I couldn't bear it slightly, but it was only for a moment, and my heart hardened again.If I am soft-hearted for a moment, it will only be endless troubles for him and me in the future.So he still had a smile on his face and said: "These words seem to be angry with me." I push again.After all, he was helpless, turned his face away, and said: "How can I be willing to be angry with you?" His hands trembled slightly, and for a moment, he closed his eyes fiercely, hugged the jade pot into his arms, and strode away. He walked outside the door and looked back three times, the nostalgia and pain in his eyes wanted to break people's hearts.I hardly dared to look up at his gaze, but just smiled as usual, seeing the nostalgia and reluctance in his eyes like the last slanting sun on the horizon, finally sinking down in despair little by little, leaving only infinite pain, seemingly boundless The night is so dark that it makes people sink. I bowed my head for a moment, and all I could say was a long sigh.