Chapter 99 Chapter 98

When Shi Yan got excited, he ignored politeness and asked directly: "Why did you come here?" "I went back to 'Dongdong', and thought you were going back, so I went to your house to have a look, but your parents said that you would not go home for the Spring Festival this year. Your parents heard me say that you would come to D City for business, so they called me Help me bring you some New Year's goods—" Huang Hai rubbed the mud on his feet by the door, and entered the house. She asked curiously: "Didn't you—didn't you say that you held a wedding at the 'Dongdong' during the Spring Festival? It's done so soon—it's over?"

"Hehe, the wedding has been cancelled, Xiao Fu has changed his mind, and he doesn't want to go back to 'Dongdong' with me to embarrass himself—" She was very sad for him, and she could imagine how embarrassing he was in front of his family. Maybe the family invited all the guests, but the daughter-in-law didn't come again. How could his parents save face?She comforted her and said, "I'm sure it's not because I'm afraid of shame, maybe it's because I don't want to part with my parents, or——I'm not feeling well——Isn't it because of happiness?"

Huang Hai chuckled again: "Unless the sun comes out from the west and we get married like we are, how can we be happy?" Knowing that he had an "empty marriage", she felt sorry for him, and she didn't know what to say to comfort him, so she stood there without saying a word, looking at him distressedly. While looking for a place to hang those bacon and fish, he turned around to comfort her and said, "I said a long time ago that I am with her just to give her a hope of going abroad so that she can get better. Now my purpose I am slowly reaching it, and she knows that she thinks I am ashamed, which means that her illness is much better, and it is too late for me to be happy—”

She was heartbroken, turned her face away, found a dry towel for him to wet his hair, found a basin, poured some hot water, told him to take off the wet shoes on his feet, and put on cotton slippers after washing his feet , so as not to freeze the feet. He followed instructions in all his actions. She wiped his head when he was told to, and scalded his feet when she asked him to.She saw that he stood up with his hair brushed. Although it looked like a mess of grass, he looked much better than before, especially from the face that was intact, he was simply handsome.And his feet are also white and slender, she thought that if his face hadn't been damaged, he would be handsome from head to toe.Somehow, when she thought of "from head to toe", her thoughts slipped to the part located at the middle point of her head and feet, and her face burned a little.

While picking up those new year's goods, she pretended to be careless and joked: "Then you are at a loss, why don't you make it a good thing while Xiaofu is still confused? If she is happy, she won't be too early Forgot about that doctor studying abroad?" He also joked: "Do you think I am a person who does this kind of thing? It's not that I am noble, but that I regard myself as very precious. If it is not someone I like, I will not do it if I give it to me." That kind of thing, I'm afraid it will tarnish my innocence—” She felt that he was trying to save face. How could a man not want to do that?Especially in the face of the past tie flowers, and people who have already got a marriage certificate, it is reasonable and legal, can they give it away?It can only be said that it is true that people did not send it.She believed that Xiao Fu was definitely not really crazy, but that he hadn't come out because of his former boyfriend, but since Xiao Fu cared so much about his former boyfriend, he naturally guarded himself like a jade.She believed that Huang Hai would not force Xiao Fu, but it was not enough to send him to his door.

Men want to save face in these things, otherwise they are not men.She remembered that she had asked Yan Jing about the bet that Zhuo Liang said, but Yan Jing said that no one had bet with Zhuo Liang at all, and she had never heard that Zhuo Liang had four or five girlfriends who are still thinking about him, so she felt that Zhuo Liang Probably because he wanted to save face, he didn't want to admit that he cared so much about Huang Hai, and he had been competing with Huang Hai all the time. Hearing that Huang Hai was so happy and relieved when he got married, he made up so many love stories to prove that he didn't care about Huang Hai, nor did he care about her. .

She didn't expose Huang Hai's face, but instead asked, "How did you find this place?" She never told him the address, and when she called, she only thanked him for helping him find a job at the Steel Factory Children Middle School, but she She didn't say anything about her separation from Zhuoyue, nor where she lived now. She told her family that she lived with Zhuoyue. He said: "I went to Nanyishe first, and wanted to ask Yao Xiaoping to transfer the things to you, but she was not there. I went to Mr. Zhuo to look for you, but you were not there. I didn't find out the home of Mr. Zhuo's parents. , otherwise I went there. I also came here with the idea of ​​giving it a try. I asked all kinds of questions. I kept asking until I went to your school, and the teacher on duty told me that you live here. Where is Mr. Zhuo? He is too busy to go home during the Spring Festival?"

She knew she couldn't hide it anymore, and she couldn't help it anymore, so she poured out all the scriptures about herself and Excellence.Although I regretted it while saying it, worrying about ruining Huang Hai's marriage, but for some reason, I just said it smoothly, like an arrow with a bow that can only move forward, and cannot turn halfway, let alone retract it and put it in. Quiver. He stood there in a daze, with complicated expressions on his face. I don't know if it was because of the complicated emotions in his heart, or because his asymmetrical face made the expressions complicated.

She laughed at herself and said, "Actually, you told me a long time ago that he was definitely not a kind person. I blamed me for not listening to you at that time—" He stammered: "I-I said he was-never-never good-and just because-no-didn't like him-I didn't know if he was good or not ——I have only a little contact with him—how can I tell whether a person is kind or not?” "Anyway, it's too late to regret now, it's useless to blame anyone, let's clean up the mess yourself—" He was stunned for a while, and said: "Shi Yan'er, I'm really sorry, I didn't expect that some of the things I did—affected your marriage—"

She asked curiously, "What did you do?" "I——send a book, call you, I really didn't mean it, I just think about my old classmates, can't I send a book and make a phone call?" When she heard his apology, she felt a little uncomfortable. She hoped that it was "intentional" that he sent books and made phone calls, not out of "old schoolmate" friendship.But hearing him make such a clear statement, it means that she is being sentimental.She also came to clarify, and said magnanimously: "Don't blame yourself, I know you are looking at it for the sake of old classmates, because Zhuoyou is too jealous——"

"It's nothing to be jealous, it means he cares about you. If it were me, I might be more suspicious than him, so I think you have problems with your marriage, and I'm the culprit. If I hadn't sent that book, Yao Xiaoping wouldn't have gone to your house. You won't find out—" She raised two eyebrows: "You mean as long as we don't know about that, our marriage will be fine?" "There are some things that you don't know are the same as you don't—" She felt a little out of touch with him, at least on this subject.She talked about her family conflicts and marital disputes, hoping to hear him resonate with her, not to hear him resonate with Excellence, but maybe men always resonate more with men, comrades in the same trench, Just like she and Yao Xiaoping are comrades-in-arms in the same trench, they can understand each other better.For some reason, she said provocatively: "You protect him so much, but he doesn't protect you at all. He heard about your marriage and said that ugly-whatever-like you are only lunatics Only fools like me would like—" He lowered his eyes and said, "He called me ugly? I'm not afraid to say I'm ugly, because I'm already ugly—" Seeing that he was still pursuing excellence, she said: "He said you are ugly and you are not afraid, so he also said that your former girlfriend was fabricated by you, it was your love skills, and he wanted to impress me with your tragic experience. Otherwise, I might not even reply to your letter—" He looked up at her, then lowered his eyes immediately, and asked in a low voice, "Will you come back?" "In your mind, am I—that kind of person?" "What kind of person?" "Is it someone who only cares about—the appearance?" "Is there anything wrong with looking after looks? I myself—have no looks, but I also like people who are beautiful—seeing people who are not beautiful—and I don't like it either. Who doesn't like people who are beautiful inside and out? No Who made the law, saying that those who have no appearance must have inner beauty, or those who are inner beautiful must have no appearance. I don’t even like my appearance, how can I force others to like it? Who said that if she likes my appearance, then she must It's—a lie—" He said that he had inquired about plastic surgery, but the doctor said that it was difficult for him to get it right, because he was injured when he was a child, and the bone on his face hadn't grown up at all, and filling it up didn't have much effect.He also said that it is much easier to transform a person's heart than his appearance, and that defects in appearance are not a guarantee of inner beauty. The two of them seem to have returned to a certain stage in the previous correspondence period. The conversation gradually pulled away from itself and slowly slid towards universal truth. It was no longer a discussion of their personal history or current situation, but something universally applicable. , such as the relationship between external and internal, the relationship between speech and action, the relationship between man and woman, the relationship between adults and children, etc., etc. During the talk, they have already made several dishes, put a small charcoal stove on the table, burned high-quality coal from the steel factory, placed a small pot on it, boiled soup, and made a homemade hot pot , Put something like tofu, fish balls, spinach vermicelli, etc. in it and eat it hot, plus the bacon and fish brought from home. It is not rich, but it is very affordable. The two of them ate hot pot by the fire, sweating and refreshing.After dinner, it was already dark, Huang Hai said that he was going to find a hotel outside, but Shi Yan disagreed: "Where can I find a hotel now? The buses have stopped, and everyone has gone back to celebrate the New Year. When you go out step by step to find a hotel, I'm afraid it will be next year. Just stay here for one night, anyway, everyone is not happy to sleep in the New Year's Eve—" He didn't insist any longer and agreed to stay.She took him to the steel factory bathhouse to take a bath, because it was New Year's Eve, there were no people there, and there was a lot of water, making it very comfortable to wash.When he came back, he cleaned up the living room. She carried two quilts out of the bedroom and put them on the sofa. They each covered a quilt and sat on the sofa to watch TV.He seemed to be taking it very seriously, smiling when he should, and not laughing when he shouldn't.And she just watched lazily, always waiting until he laughed, and she didn't know there was something funny on TV, so in order to show that she was also watching, she smiled along with it.But she kept thinking about what she would do if he reached out and took her hand now, or what she would do if he took her to him. But he never reached out. Seeing that it was midnight, she felt tired and didn't want to really last until tomorrow morning, so she said good night and went to bed in the bedroom.She heard him turn off the TV and the lights, and the room became silent and dark. She fell asleep until her eyelids closed, but when she lay on the bed, she couldn't fall asleep. Slowly recalling the little things she had with him, she felt that what he said was right. The most ideal lover, of course, is inside and outside. Among the beautiful people, the so-called falling in love with a person who only has inner beauty is just because he can't find someone who is both inner and outer beautiful, so he has to give up one end and care about the other. Where in the world is there someone who only loves ugly people?She has never loved his appearance, and she doesn't like it now, but she knows that he is good, so she doesn't care about his appearance. She thought of the stories of those lonely men and widows living together in the same room and some romantic things happened, and she felt that she was not disgusted with it. If Huang Hai came to her, she would definitely agree to him, especially considering that he had lived for more than 20 years. Married, with a wife in name, and this wife in name may still be around him from time to time, but he has never tasted lovemaking, and she is very sorry for him.For the sake of her child, she herself would not think about orgasms, but she was willing to let him enjoy it. Several times, she seemed to hear the sound of him approaching the bedroom, but when she held her breath, it didn't seem to be the case.Because she couldn't sleep, she always wanted to go to the bathroom, and had to pass the living room every time, and woke him up a few times, but he only said a few words to her vaguely, and she didn't express anything else, and she was a little disappointed , Thinking of the words he said: "It's not someone I like, even if you give it to me, you won't do that kind of thing, for fear of tarnishing my innocence—" She also heard the sound of him getting up to go to the toilet. That night, they went to the toilet like a competition. You go to the toilet, and I go to the toilet. , the sound of flushing water, the sound of turning off the lights, the sound of closing the toilet door, but the sound of urinating in the middle was not heard.Because she was squatting and seeing Huang Hai in the living room, she stretched very cautiously. In addition, she didn't urinate much each time, so it was understandable that she stretched silently.But what about the Yellow Sea?She remembered that Zhuo Liang made a lot of noise every time he went to the bathroom, man, he peed condescendingly, with both kinetic energy and potential energy, how could he not make a huge noise?Could it be that Huang Hai squatted down to drag because he was afraid that she would hear it? She just thought about it wildly, and didn't fall asleep until it was almost dawn.But before she slept for a long time, she heard someone knocking on the door. She was afraid it was Zhuoyou, and was about to warn Huang Hai not to open the door, but it was too late, Huang Hai had already gone to open the door, and then there was the sound of two people talking in the living room. "Mr. Zhuo, it's so early!" "Why are you here?" "I came to D City for business. Shi Yan's family asked me to bring some New Year's goods. I went to your house yesterday, but you were not there, so I came here—"