Chapter 79 Chapter 78

Shi Yan told Yao Xiaoping about her aspirations, and Yao Xiaoping couldn't laugh or cry: "I said you are too young, but you still don't believe me. Look at you, you think things are so simple." "Isn't it that simple? I'm not afraid of death, but I'm afraid of his excellence?" "The problem is that he won't let you die. It's too easy to let you die. You close your eyes, stretch your feet, and nothing happens. He won't let you die so easily. If he wants to Retaliation, he can ask the school to take back the fertility index and not give it to you, and see how you give birth—"

When it comes to children, she is not so stubborn. She is not afraid of death, but she is very afraid that her children will lose their birthright.She said hopefully: "But he really wants a child, so he will deprive his child of his birthright?" "Maybe he wants this child very much, but he also knows that if he really wants to get a divorce, he doesn't necessarily want to have this child. If he can't get it, what is the difference from him not having a child? A person like him, yes Whether it's women or children, it's not about loving them, but wanting to own them. Since it's impossible for him to have children, he might as well not let you have this child at all, which is also a punishment for you. Hey, a Work, a child, I think with these two tricks, you have to go back to him obediently in the end—it’s better to go back as soon as possible. When he comes to beg you next time, just turn a blind eye and close your eyes Only one eye, let him go—”

"You don't know how irritating he is, he has done those ugly things himself, and he still wants to shirk responsibility. He can't wait to say that it's all my fault. He always speaks cruelly, threatens and intimidates, trying to scare me, convince me, A person like this, how do you tell me to live with him?" Yao Xiaoping sighed and said: "People have to bow their heads under the low eaves. Who told us that our beauty is unlucky?" She said angrily: "I don't believe in this evil. If he uses these threats to subdue him, he will get worse and I will never live comfortably. I just want him to know that there are people in this world who are not afraid of him." .If he loved me well from the beginning, maybe I would forgive him this time; if he made a mistake and confessed it honestly, maybe I would forgive him too, but he never loved me well. Manipulating tricks, playing tricks, doing ugly things and always thinking of crooked ways to resolve conflicts. If I'm afraid of him once, he'll make an inch—"

Yao Xiaoping relented her heart: "Forget it, I thought things were too scary, maybe he didn't have the patience at all, anyway, no one knows about your marriage, he will tear up the marriage certificate when he goes back, and then find another yellow flower It's so easy for a girl, it's not worth hanging on a tree of yours—" What she said made her happy: "I think so too. He said that there are many female students who like him. Why should he pester me? Now, he will try a few times first. If I change my mind, he can continue to bully me." , but if I don't change my mind, he won't be bothered to spend any more time, just find any female student who is better than me—"

"You think that he will find female students, and he can find female students, are you angry?" She couldn't think of anything to be angry about: "Why should I be angry? Which female student would like to be with someone like him, it's her bad luck, I'm not angry—" "Then you are more free and easy than me. Although I didn't love my husband at that time, I was still very angry when he ran after others because he didn't take me seriously. Am I not as good as that woman? So I Be good with Yan Jing, at first it was a bit of revenge on my husband, but later I felt that Yan Jing is really a good man, although he is not as smart and capable as you, but he is good, and he does not dislike me for being married—”

She was puzzled: "Why do you always say 'don't dislike', 'don't dislike'? Why does he dislike you when you are rigorous?" "Forget it, you don't understand, a woman is married and has a child, and her price goes down. If you still treat yourself like a golden girl, no one will marry you—" Her stubbornness came up again, "If no one marries, no one will marry, and I don't depend on anyone for support—" Yao Xiaoping sighed and said, "It's not a matter of who you depend on for support, but rather -- emotional needs. If in this world, no one cares about you or loves you, what's the point?"

This made her feel heavy, but she felt that it was useless to worry about such things. You hope that someone loves you, but maybe no one loves you. No matter how much you lower yourself, there may still be no one loves you. what would you do?Is it not alive?And if you lower your own worth against your will, even if you get someone's love, what's the point? Besides, this is a problem to be considered in the future. The top priority now is not the issue of remarriage, but the issue of survival. Her own survival, the survival of her children, and emotional needs are all relegated to the second tier. When she puts the issue of survival It's settled, it's not too late to think about it.

She's not the proactive type, but she's not the one who waits to die either.She knew that it was not enough to have a backbone, she had to have fighting power, otherwise, she would be defeated by Excellence in one fell swoop, leaving only a backbone, which could not be eaten as food.She began to find a way out for herself, and asked Yao Xiaoping to help her find out which middle school teachers were poor. She also asked her former classmates to help her find out. She still doesn't believe that the outstanding mother will help her son use power for personal gain. Based on her feeling, she feels that Aunt Qiao is not that kind of person. Maybe Aunt Qiao didn't ask the teacher college to deal with her for her son's sake, but that doesn't mean that Qiao For the sake of her son, the aunt would not let her teach in a middle school in D city.She entered a middle school in D city, and that's not counting as opening the back door. Why did Aunt Qiao mess up her affairs?Maybe Aunt Qiao, the director of the education committee, would strongly welcome her to teach in a middle school in city D.

Everyone found good news for her. Almost every middle school lacked teachers. When they heard that they graduated from the normal school, they all welcomed them.She was very happy to hear that, and she was less afraid of excellence, and almost resigned from the teacher's college on her own initiative. Yao Xiaoping taught her a lesson: "Why do you resign because of nothing? Don't act like I was at the time. I was afraid that the department would not keep me, so I accepted the job in the attached middle school early. I was assigned by graduation at that time, and I would be in trouble if I stepped on the ground. Now, you are still occupying a latrine, and the shit hasn't swelled yet, so why are you panicking?"

She felt that Yao Xiaoping's metaphor was a bit vulgar, but the truth was not vulgar, so she said, "That's true—" "You can just use this to test Zhuoyue to see if he is as bad as we imagined. If the Teacher Academy tells you to leave, it means that he has made trouble. If the Teacher Academy didn't tell you to leave at all, then you Why are you leaving? If you resign voluntarily, you won't be able to measure whether or not Excellence will retaliate against you—" Like a tutor recruiting a graduate student, the two of them worked out the questions and waited for that guy to come to take the test.

This high-level test has not yet seen the outcome, another low-level test has arrived first-their gas has burned out.Shi Yan firmly disapproved of asking Zhuo Zhuo to change the gas for them. She thought it was too—that, they had already separated and made such a mess, and how could they ask him to change the gas? But Yao Xiaoping has a different opinion: "What's the matter? You are pregnant with his child. Whether you eat well or not is directly related to the child's health. Even if he hates you, he should not hate his own child. If he really I love this child, and I definitely hope to improve the child's nutrition, shouldn't he change the gas for us?" "I wouldn't tell him about it, I wouldn't ask him—" she insisted. "Why is this begging him? This is giving him a chance to perform. You don't tell me." Yao Xiaoping said, "We will use this altar of gas as a touchstone. If you make trouble with him like this, he can still If you help us change this jar of gas, it means that he really loves you and your children; if he refuses to help us change this jar of gas, it means that he is inhuman, he doesn’t really love children, and he doesn’t really love you. What he loves is himself, his face—” She also felt that what Yao Xiaoping said was reasonable, so she agreed to Yao Xiaoping to test Zhuoyue and negotiate with him about the gas. Yao Xiaoping ran downstairs to make a phone call, then climbed upstairs panting, and said, "Shi, do you think he is cunning—" "What's the matter?" "He didn't say he wouldn't change it for us, and he didn't say he would change it for us. He said he would find a way, but he might not be able to get gas—" "Hmph, what else can he think of? Every time he switches to gas at once—" "I thought so too, so I deliberately asked him, you are such a capable person, why don't you worry about not being able to get gas? Didn't you use to make one pot after another?" "How did he say?" Yao Xiaoping imitated Zhuoyou's tone: "The past was the past, and the present is the present. The person who helped me get gas in the past is no longer working at the gas station. I have to find another way——" She said stubbornly: "We don't count on his gas anymore, we just eat in the cafeteria, and it can save some trouble—" Yao Xiaoping explained: "I don't care where to eat, I'm afraid that if you eat canteen food, your nutrition won't keep up—" "I can go to the stir-fry department to buy food, the food there is good—" "It's good, but it's so expensive! Your monthly salary is not enough for you to eat there, and you still have to save some money for when you have a baby. After the baby is born, you have to pay for a nanny. Buy milk powder or something for your child, when you have a headache—" "Then what do you say? Is it because of this that you seek excellence and let me go back?" "It's useless to beg him now. He doesn't have to take you in. Even if he does, he will always treat this as a painful nail of yours. He can pinch you a few times if he wants—" Yao Xiaoping suggested cautiously, "I think you'd better get rid of the child - if you don't have a child - you won't be afraid of him -" She knew what Yao Xiaoping said was right, but she couldn't bear to kill this child, it was a life, a life that was connected with her flesh and blood.The child already knows how to kick her and kick her. Every day, she will do gymnastics with the child for a while. The child's little hands and feet bulge up on her stomach, and she grabs the bag and gently "fights" with the child. The child's strength is not small, and she can hold it for a while, and then she said to the child silently: "Baby, use another hand to hold it", the child seemed to understand it, and let the bag disappear after a while. After a while, another bag bulged in another part of her stomach. She believed that the child had changed hands, so she went to "fight" with that arm. She barely slept that night, thinking about the child all the time, but she was not thinking about whether to do it or not, she would definitely not do it, she was thinking about where to get money to raise the child question.She knows that there are people who make money as tutors, but she definitely can't do tutoring with a child, so don't count on that extra money.She has a little savings, and she can ask her parents for money, and they will definitely support her. Excellence should also pay for the child's living expenses, but she estimated that he would renege on the debt and not pay, and use financial means to crush her.She won't do what he does, she will find a way to force him to pay his share of the money.She remembered seeing a country woman a few times before, carrying her child in a cloth sack, sitting in the office of the department crying about her husband not giving them the living expenses of their mother and child.Later she found out that the woman's husband was a teacher in the department who had taught her. She used to admire him quite a bit, but after seeing his wife come to ask for bills, she saw that teacher for nothing. As long as Excellence can afford to lose this person.