Chapter 11 Chapter 8 Dream of Prolonging Life you are my really love

In fact, I just want to walk alone on a crowded road on a summer night. Then, it disappeared as quietly and peacefully as the wind. If I can really transform into the shape of the wind, I just want to overlook our city. Overlook the place where we once met. Overlook the places that have accompanied all our sorrows. Overlooking the past, overlooking the time. Overlooking the past time. That pinellia, sometimes, I always wonder if we are each other in the mirror?I stand on this side of the mirror, you stand on the other side of the mirror, we breathe the same, we cry the same, or we even think in the same way, but what we never know is that a thin mirror Block you and me at both ends, you are at the other end, and I am at this end, so we can't touch each other, our worlds are always intertwined in parallel.So, what did our encounter represent, is it just a gorgeous farewell to the upcoming lie?

——From Zhiwei's Quotations The sun was dazzlingly bright, and in the early morning sky, groups of pigeons flapped their wings and flew past, before disappearing in a blink of an eye. The sky is slightly whitish.The air exudes the fragrance of mud and grass, and there are sounds on the street, faint dogs barking, sprinklers playing old songs, children carrying schoolbags to school, and grandma selling soybean milk and fried dough sticks. . From nowhere came a dull and hoarse bell, which struck six times. After entering the classroom, Su Banxia clearly felt how early she had come. Except for her, there were only two "good kids" in the whole class who were reading English early.Su Banxia looked at the empty classroom and sighed, then took her schoolbag and walked to her seat.

Zhiwei hasn't come yet. Su Banxia looked at the empty place beside her and smiled lonely. She took out an English exercise book from her schoolbag and prepared for morning reading.While reading, she slowly raised her head, and suddenly remembered that she hadn't seen Mo Fanlu for a week. He must still be grieving over his mother's death. Looking out of the window, you can see students wearing summer uniforms entering the teaching building one after another on the playground. In fact, those faces, whether rigid, dull or beautiful, have no brilliance in Su Banxia's eyes , her eyes suddenly lit up only because she saw Zhiwei walking in from the school gate from a distance, she was carrying her white NIKE schoolbag, and looked a little tired.Ke Jiang walked beside her, and he patted her on the shoulder cautiously. Although he couldn't hear what he said clearly, it should be some lines like "Are you okay" or "What's wrong with you".

During this week, Su Banxia saw Ke Jiang coming to the class to look for Zhiwei almost every day, and she looked very happy every time.However, Zhiwei didn't have the same look on her face.She just lowered her eyes, then said to Su Banxia, ​​"I'm sorry, I'll go out for a while" and walked towards Ke Jiang who was standing at the door of the classroom. So, you don't like Ke Jiang's eyes, do you? Su Banxia looked at Zhiwei and Ke Jiang walking on the playground from a distance. She watched Ke Jiang stretch out her arms and gently wrap her arms around Zhiwei's shoulders. Her eyes were filled with worry. Among the countless crowds, only What he showed was a distressed expression.Zhiwei beside him just shook her head quietly, raised her face, and smiled "I'm fine" at Ke Jiang.The morning sun shines through the clouds and shines on the shoulders of Zhiwei and Ke Jiang, so they are outlined by the golden light, as if they were coated with a layer of gorgeous gold.

Su Banxia rested her chin and looked at them from a distance, until countless people covered their figures, until finally they could no longer be seen, Su Banxia's eye sockets suddenly turned red inexplicably. She lowered her head abruptly, stretched out her hand to cover her face, but tears still flowed out from between her fingers inadvertently, smashed onto the table, and turned into transparent pieces with a few slaps. The throbbing of her temples was a tingling pain, and she felt fine beads of sweat oozing from the corners of her forehead, and there was a silent echo in her chest, which came from the sobbing cry in her heart.

Mo Fanlu was lying on the hospital bed, slowly opened his eyes, the undrawn white curtains were tightly attached to the window, the white sunlight came in from the window, and the nasal cavity was full of disinfectant smell. Looks like it's a brand new day. He pursed his lips and smiled, then straightened up from the bed, leaned on the pillow, and felt a pain in his right hand.He didn't care, because he was used to the feeling of being dripped with white tape intertwined on the back of his hand.The blood vessels all over his body were infused with cold liquid, and the transparent plastic tube swung back and forth on top of his head a few times, then slowly stopped.

It seems that a year has passed, and my body and mind are all old.Mo Fanlu raised his eyes and looked at the calendar on the window sill. It was already June 25th.He moved his body, and after finding a more comfortable feeling, he raised his head back, pressed it against the pillow quietly, and closed his eyes gently.The memory of being sent to the hospital for mandatory gastric lavage a week ago suddenly appeared in his mind.The horrible sound of gastric lavage still echoed in his ears, he frowned suddenly, and the corners of his mouth choked. The door of the ward was pushed open with a "creak", and Qi Nuoqiao walked in with a bowl of steaming rice porridge. In the sunlight, she quietly looked at the pale and thin Mo Fanlu beside the bed.

Walked over slowly, sat next to him and said, "Come on, have a drink, I just called from the hospital cafeteria." Mo Fanlu turned his head, looked at Qi Nuoqiao, and raised his hand to take the bowl in her hand. Qi Nuoqiao hurriedly dodged, she looked at the needle on the back of his right hand, then smiled at him, and said, "It's not convenient for you now, I'll feed you." Sunlight penetrates through the glass windows and covers the body layer by layer, showing a gentle texture.Mo Fanlu did not refuse, but let Qi Nuoqiao blow the rice porridge in the spoon again and again, and then fed him mouthfuls.

The warm rice porridge melted into the mouth and slid into the esophagus, which also warmed the cold stomach. "The doctor said that you will stay in the hospital for observation for a while." Qi Nuoqiao blew on the hot air coming out of the bowl, and looked sideways at Mo Fanlu from time to time, "So you still have to drink porridge every day. Porridge is used to nourish the body. As for the stomach, it always looks like this after gastric lavage, I heard them say that the mucous membrane of the stomach is very fragile." Mo Fanlu propped up his still weak body and straightened his waist. He didn't speak, but raised his hand and pushed the bowl in Qi Nuoqiao's hand, which meant that he was full.

Qi Nuoqiao understood what he meant, and put the bowl on the low cabinet next to the white hospital bed. "What are you going to do in the future?" After a moment of silence, Qi Nuoqiao asked. Mo Fanlu twitched the corner of his mouth and smiled, and said in a calm voice, "I don't know, let's talk about the future." Qi Nuoqiao looked at him, smiled and nodded: "That's right—" The sunlight reflected mottled on the wall, and the ward was very quiet, except for the half bowl of rice porridge on the low cabinet, with white steam rising up, curling upwards like smoke, and finally disappeared.

In the quiet hospital corridor, outside the ward with the sign "No. 302 Mo Fanlu", Sang Ran glanced in through the crack of the door. In fact, only a few glances were enough, because she did see Qi Nuoqiao feeding porridge to Mo Fanlu. The picture of Fan Lu eating. For some reason, seeing such a picture, Sang Ran felt much more relieved, as if he was relieved. If she can be by his side, then he must be able to regain his strength.Thinking of this, Sang Ran smiled reassuringly, then turned around and left the hospital quietly. At least, Nuo Qiao is more suitable for Fan Lu than Su Banxia. When I returned to school, it was already the last class in the afternoon. The light of the setting sun has gradually covered the entire teaching building, and the sky is covered with billowing fire clouds, brilliant blood red, as if it is about to burn the sky. Sang Ran walked into the corridor of the school, raised her wrist, and there were still 20 minutes to finish class, since there were only 20 minutes left, there was no need to go back to the classroom.Thinking of this, when he raised his head, he happened to see Su Banxia walking across the corridor, she was holding a mop in her hand, probably on duty. What is certain is that she also saw herself. When she looked at her expression, she was startled for a moment, and then immediately turned into doubt. Then, Sang Ran saw her walking straight towards her, and asked with a frown: "Is it Sang Ran?" It turned out that she still remembered his name. Sang Ran looked at her, nodded, and asked in a low voice, "Didn't you go to the hospital that day?" Su Banxia's fingers holding the mop shook, facing Sang Ran, she didn't speak. The setting sun shone in through the corridor window, swirled back and forth at the corner of the stairs, and then refracted onto the wall, blooming a golden mottle. "Really! It seems that I really didn't go." Sang Ran said indifferently as if she misunderstood the meaning of the girl bowing her head and not speaking. Su Banxia's fingers gradually tightened. The boy and the girl just stood face to face, and neither of them spoke. Until Su Banxia lowered his head and finally asked in a low voice: "Well, Mo Fanlu doesn't seem to have come to school recently..." "Yeah." Sang Ran nodded, the setting sun was dazzling, he squinted his eyes and looked at the top of Su Banxia's lowered head, "Are you concerned about him?" Even Fan Lu didn't stay by his side when he was in the most pain, and now I ask him again, what problem can he solve?No matter how you look at it, it feels a little fake, doesn't it? Sang Ran smiled disdainfully. However, this smile was not seen by Su Banxia. After a long time, Su Banxia raised her head. She squeezed the dry corners of her mouth, looked at Sang Ran and asked seriously: "Is... is he alright?" Sang Ran exhaled lightly, with an imperceptible anger faintly emerging on his face, then he raised his jaw and stared at Su Banxia with a cold mocking look. "Very good." He said quietly, his Adam's apple choked, and he continued, "He is doing well now, so don't bother him." Su Banxia suddenly raised her head, a surprised expression was projected into Sang Ran's sight. Do you think you didn't hurt him enough? Sang Ran turned around and walked down the stairs. The infinitely gorgeous sunset flows lonely in the entire corridor, and the world is dyed with a dreamy color. The earth under the feet is like a huge Rubik's cube. There will always be a pair of black hands to rotate the Rubik's cube. Constantly rotating, splitting and rejoining, pieced together, when will the Rubik's cube be put together completely? Su Banxia raised her head, she was the only one left in the corridor. She stood there, looking at the shadowy spots of light on the ground, raised her hand and rubbed her wet eyes, then ordered herself to murmur, what are you crying for, what is there to cry about, don't cry. It's just that she just felt that she seemed to be abandoned again. ——Some things never happen if you avoid them. ——It is true. --real. It was like in the last class in the afternoon, Su Banxia was going to be on duty in the corridor, while Zhiwei sat on the seat alone and stared at the blackboard in a daze. The students in the classroom are all working very hard to record the notes left by the teacher, but Zhiwei can't write a single word no matter what.She held the ballpoint pen in her hand and remained motionless.The setting sun came in from outside the window, illuminating her face, even the eyelashes were covered with a layer of beautiful golden edges, the contours of the whole body were covered with furry thin lines, and the eyes were full of beautiful golden lights. She raised her head and looked at the clock hanging on the wall in the classroom. It was ten minutes before get out of class ended.At this time, the phone in his pocket suddenly vibrated. Zhiwei was stunned for a moment, and glanced at the teacher who was writing the question on the blackboard with her back facing her, and then opened the cover of the phone. The moment she saw the sender, she felt like she was about to stop breathing. It was a short message with the name "Lu Chuanzi" at the beginning. Zhiwei exhaled deeply, clenched her trembling lips and looked down. "I'll wait for you downstairs at my house. Let's meet. You will come, right?" Zhiwei opened her eyes wide as she looked at the text message, and didn't know what to reply for a long time.Her heart was beating rapidly, and she clutched her chest and frowned tightly. After closing the phone with a "snap", Zhiwei laid heavily on the table, buried her face between her arms, her expression was invisible, only her shoulders kept rising and falling. In fact, I know that I still can't completely forget you. In fact, I know that even if you deceive me like a fool, I'm still willing. In fact, I know that the moment I saw the text message you sent, I even felt that even if I was killed by you, it would be really good, because it was you, just because it was you. When school was over, Ke Jiang was still going to wait for Zhiwei at the door of Zhiwei's classroom as usual. The corridor was a mess, and the boys in every classroom were almost rushing out in a swarm, and kept going back and forth while rushing. Crying "Get out of the way". Just as she was about to reach Zhiwei's classroom, Ke Jiang suddenly received a text message. He took out his mobile phone, the sender was "Zhiwei", opened the message and read, the content was: "I have something to do, you go first, don't wait for me." Ke Jiang frowned in confusion, and when he was about to reply "what's the rush", he inadvertently raised his head, and then saw Zhiwei walking out of the classroom.She looked very flustered and anxious, and with the white NIKE schoolbag in her hand, she squeezed through the crowd and ran towards the end of the corridor. Ke Jiang called her a few times, but unfortunately she didn't hear her. The crowd crowded each other in the corridor, layer upon layer like huge waves.Ke Jiang closed the phone, involuntarily quickened her pace, and walked towards the place where Zhiwei disappeared. Being on duty is not something to be happy about. Every time I started cleaning during the last class in the afternoon, Su Banxia dragged the wet mop around in the corridor.There were still faint tears in the corners of her eyes, and she looked somewhat swollen. There were fewer and fewer people left in the school, and occasionally students in twos and threes would brush past her.Under the setting sun, the whole campus looks silent and silent, with an indescribable desolation, and the whole heart feels empty, lonely, and lonely. The bell tower in the campus has already rang five times, and a large number of white pigeons flapped their wings and flew past the window. Su Banxia thought of Zhiwei, but her cell phone had disappeared, so even if she wanted to send a short message to Zhiwei, it would be a fantasy. When the cleaning was almost finished, Su Banxia picked up the mop and walked back into the classroom. Beside her, less than a meter away, there were three girls walking side by side, they were arm in arm and chatting about something. In fact, Su Banxia didn't intend to pay attention to it, but she slowed down when she heard the name of someone she knew well. Hurt Su Banxia's senses. "I'm not lying, this is what the head teacher of our class said personally." "You mean that Mo Fanlu really committed suicide? No, I'm so sad." One of the girls yelled. "I don't know, maybe I didn't die, right? Oh, why don't you think about it when it's so good. As for it." Another girl said more viciously. --suicide. Su Banxia's fingers tightly grasped the handle of the mop, and there was a loud buzzing in her brain. She froze there, and her eyes were immediately filled with red bloodshot eyes, jumping up one by one. In the sky outside the window, the wind is blowing, and the big fire clouds are spinning wantonly in the sky. From the branches of the camphor tree, crisp birdsong came into the ears, but such sweet singing unexpectedly tore the nerves on the ear bones. The world is painted gray without knowing it. As evening approached, the light of the setting sun had gradually faded to blood red. Weeds are growing wildly under the slightly old attic.In summer, they are coated with soft and beautiful green, and when the wind blows, dandelion seeds will fly into the air in the wild grass, and then spin and fly away into the distance. Panting, Zhiwei came to the attic of Lu Chuanzi's house. She stood under the streetlight and patted her chest, hoping to calm her shortness of breath.Many boys passing by nearby cast complicated glances at Zhiwei, and even blew a sharp whistle towards her back. Zhiwei has no time to take care of those. She just stood there quietly, quietly waiting for Lu Chuanzi to appear. Her heart was beating very fast, as if it was about to burst out of her chest, and even when the name "Lu Chuanzi" was mentioned in her heart, Zhiwei would blush uncontrollably. Only Lu Chuanzi could make her feel such a feeling. Hearing the sound of pattering footsteps behind her, Zhiwei turned her head quickly.Lu Chuanzi stood behind her, with the hood of his coat on his head, and the collarbone under his neck clearly undulating. He seemed to be a silhouette jumped on a white paper, with a pale but proud and thin body. shape. Zhiwei looked at him, as if staring at an old friend who hadn't seen him for a long time. She hadn't seen him for a long time, but it felt like she had never been separated. Lu Chuanzi didn't speak, and there was no unnecessary expression on his face.The two people just looked at each other in silence, as if there was a vacuum of air between them, only time slipped away from them bit by bit. Zhiwei lowered her head, looked sideways at Lu Chuanzi, her gaze was fixed in his eyes, as if reviewing a familiar picture.She thought about what to say, but what should she say?I can't even find the language, what should I do? While thinking this way, the boy suddenly opened his mouth—— "Hey, Little Gardenia, long time no see." It's just been a long time. Zhiwei felt her throat was astringent. For some reason, Zhiwei felt an inexplicable sense of tension all over her body. Her mind was a little stiff, so stiff that she actually asked the question that had been bothering her all this time. : "That night, why did you..." Before he finished speaking, he was cut off by Lu Chuanzi. He walked a few steps towards her, raised the corners of his mouth and said with a smile in his usual manner: "You really want to know why I didn't come to the appointment that night, yes wrong?" Zhiwei was startled for a moment, but neither shook her head nor nodded. Lu Chuanzi still smiled, and said with a lukewarm smile, "—Actually, I really did it on purpose. Do you want to know the reason?" Zhiwei suddenly frowned, and the corner of her mouth was filled with bitter sobs. "However, there's no big reason." Lu Chuanzi looked at Zhiwei's expression with satisfaction, paused, and continued, "That little Zhihua, I'm just tired of you, so I want to find an excuse Just get rid of you, it's that simple." Zhiwei's eye sockets became more and more red, the corners of her mouth kept drooping, and her voice trembled inadvertently, "Did you never take me seriously?" Lu Chuanzi looked at her, and suddenly leaned down and pressed her ear, and whispered softly, "You got the answer right." Such an intimate gesture looks a lot like a kiss. However, it was an extremely cruel and cruel sentence. With just three words of "correct answer", it easily destroyed all the dreams and hopes that Zhiwei embraced, and then trampled on them fiercely, and finally turned them all into withered powder. Blown away by the wind. Tossed about by the wind. With a few tiny crackling sounds, the ground was dripped with black marks. Zhiwei closed her eyes, and the tears on her eyelashes rolled down to the ground. Lu Chuanzi didn't speak anymore, he raised his hand, It seemed that he wanted to pat Zhiwei's head, but he stopped his hand in mid-air, then retracted it silently, pursed the corners of his mouth, turned and left. finished?It's over. Look, there is another sad hole. Qi Nuoqiao rushed to the bathroom in the ward and began to vomit violently, but she couldn't vomit out anything, just retching, with a feeling of overwhelming nausea in her stomach. There was a faint uneasiness in her heart, she turned on the faucet and began to slap her cheeks with cold water, then took out a non-scented tissue from her pocket to wipe the corners of her mouth. The sound of splashing water filled the ward.The sound of knocking on the door reached her ears, Qi Nuoqiao hurriedly turned around and opened the door, and Mo Fanlu in a striped hospital gown appeared in front of her. He looked at her, his eyes drooped in worry, and asked in a low voice, "I've vomited three times today, are you okay?" Qi Nuoqiao smiled at him, made an "OK" gesture, and said, "It's okay, it's been like this recently, I've been used to it for a long time, hehe." After finishing speaking, she walked past him, He picked up the thermos on the low cabinet and poured a glass of water to rinse his mouth. As if realizing something, Mo Fanlu turned back to look at Qi Nuoqiao's slender back, and suddenly frowned, opened his mouth only to realize that his voice was a little hoarse: "Whose one?" Qi Nuoqiao just drank the water quietly without answering. "Whose is it?" He approached her and asked again. She lowered her head and put the water glass back on the low cabinet, the water surface shook slightly a few times. "Is it... Chuan Zi?" Qi Nuoqiao raised her head and looked at Mo Fanlu without shaking her head or nodding, but shrugged her shoulders lightly and smiled helplessly. He looked at the smile she forced out, and immediately a heavy boulder rolled into his chest, hitting the artery of his heart hard, and then let out a dull "hum". He couldn't help stretching out his hand, touched Qin Nuoqiao's shoulder, and gently pulled her into his embrace. She just pressed her face to his chest quietly, listened to his heartbeat, then smiled faintly, and murmured: "Then Fan Lu, now that we are like this, we seem to be back in the past... But, do you think that compared to before, I haven't made any progress at all?" Mo Fanlu frowned, raised his hand to caress her soft curly hair, his Adam's apple slid up and down lonely. In the bathroom, there was the sound of the faucet running. The sky gradually darkened, but the street lights were not on yet. Zhiwei stood under the attic for a while, then raised her head and glanced at the attic of Lu Chuanzi's house, two lines of tears flowed down the corners of her eyes, illuminating the dark night. This counts as a breakup, right?Zhiwei wiped the wet corners of her eyes, and when she turned around and raised her head, she suddenly saw Ke Jiang standing in front of her. He seemed to have been standing there without moving, so he looked at her with anger and complaints in his eyes. Zhiwei opened her eyes in bewilderment, she took a step towards him, but heard the other party's voice almost yelling: "Don't come near me!" — Don't come near me. In this way, Zhiwei stabbed Zhiwei's fingertips that were stretched out to him.She had never seen him show such an expression, full of surprise, helplessness, and sadness, and finally all of them condensed into ridicule. Yes, full of complex irony. He stood in front of her, and a street light at the intersection turned on, which happened to shine on his face.She could clearly see that there were bloodshot eyes in his eyes.He asked, "You didn't break up with him?" Zhiwei shook her head desperately, and explained: "No, it's not what you think, Ke Jiang, listen to me..." "Forget it." The boy instinctively twitched the corner of his mouth, rubbed his hair, looked at Zhiwei with red eyes and said, "I already know, you are just a random girl." When she heard the ending of that sentence, it was as if a switch had been flipped, and Zhiwei's tears flowed down. She shook her head and kept saying, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. no. Ke Jiang stood motionless. Under the light of the street lamp, the boy's white uniform was clean and clear, without the slightest stain.There was no change in expression on his heroic face.Slowly he turned around, stopped looking at Zhiwei, and just turned his back to her and said in a low voice: "Don't play me for a fool, if you like to be in two boats, you'd better find someone else, I will Sure enough, I still can't be so magnanimous, and then accept the current you." Without giving her any chance to explain, the boy left without saying a word. Seeing his back going further and further away, Zhiwei bit her lips tightly, she raised her hand again and rubbed her eyes vigorously, her shoulders kept trembling. ——It’s really not like that, why can’t you listen to my explanation?I never lied to you, I have broken up with him. He said this in his heart, but Ke Jiang would never hear him. The traffic lights were constantly changing overhead, and the flow of people and cars around me beat on my body like huge waves. Ke Jiang melted into this huge wave, bumping up and down among the rushing crowd expressionlessly. There is the noise of chaos, the sound of cars, and the whispers of the crowd. It's annoying. It's annoying. It's annoying. Standing on the zebra crossing, he tightly covered his ears, frowned, clenched his teeth and stopped his figure.A few drops of water fell on the ground, leaving a black mark on the asphalt road. The night wind is always cool, and it is already approaching the end of summer. Su Banxia rushed to the hospital again in a hurry. She hurried to the "outpatient department" at the door to inquire about Mo Fanlu's ward. A middle-aged female nurse with a large ironing roll raised her head and glanced at Su Banxia, ​​and then said to her indifferently: "It's the one that committed suicide a few days ago. Go inside, the one in 302." In a hurry, Su Banxia forgot to even say "thank you" and ran towards the end of the corridor. Behind me came the sour muttering voices of middle-aged and female nurses: "Tsk tsk, today's children don't even have the most basic upbringing, and they don't know how to say thank you. How did parents educate them..." A dim yellow light bulb hung on the ceiling in the corridor, and the ambiguous light flickered dimly.When she found Mo Fanlu's ward, she found that the door of the ward was ajar.She calmed down and raised her hand. Just when she was about to open the door and walk in, she saw a scene through the half-open door that made her stop. What kind of picture is that? Through the half-open door, you can clearly see the scene in the ward.The girl with curly brown hair was quietly lying in the arms of a boy, and the boy who gave her a warm embrace was Mo Fanlu in a striped hospital gown. Such a picture is like a war movie about the survival of the survivors. After the war full of gunpowder and pain ended, the hero and heroine finally found each other, so they embraced each other tightly and made promises of eternity and happiness to each other. Su Banxia stood at the door of the ward and watched this scene quietly. At this moment, she looked at Mo Fanlu's pale but delicate face, she watched his fingers gently stroking the girl's curly hair, Looking at the "happiness" of "the rest of their life" between them, she suddenly felt like an outsider singing a one-man show, and there was no place for her in the whole world. It was as if a sharp blade pierced into Su Banxia's chest quickly and fiercely, so her internal organs began to ache violently, as if she was about to be hollowed out, the pain was unspeakable Severe pain, those severe pains were all choked in the throat, and slowly jumped up, up, all the way to the bottom of the eyes, and then the eye sockets were also extremely painful, and the tears instantly blurred the vision. In the ward, under the pale light, Mo Fanlu hugged Qi Nuoqiao tightly, as if giving her some comfort as a friend.When he raised his head, he suddenly saw Su Banxia standing at the door with tears streaming down his face. He opened his eyes, and then an inexplicable sourness filled his nasal cavity. At that moment, they looked at each other. Through the fierceness of a door, he and she stared at each other. Until finally, Su Banxia lowered her head, she avoided his gaze, raised her hand and wiped the corners of her eyes vigorously, closed the door of the ward, then turned around and left without looking back. Walking out of the hospital, everything returned to calm.Only the heart was throbbing, it was like sharp and huge scissors, it was cutting her heart vigorously, Su Banxia frowned, clutched her chest suddenly, and suddenly felt breathless , She couldn't breathe at all, she squatted down in pain, stretched out her hands to support the cold ground, panting heavily. What flashed through her mind was the happy childhood spent with her father and mother, Zhiwei's gentle and reassuring smile, and the scene when Mo Fanlu took her to the military airport. But now I can't see these things, I can't see anything, Su Banxia feels her ears are buzzing, her temples feel like being pricked by needles, tears flow down the bridge of her nose, and flow into the corners of her mouth. The pain eroded her heart, she closed her eyes sadly, and what greeted her was a dark world. Then Zhiwei, are you like me, hiding somewhere and crying quietly? Hearing the sound of the door of the ward being closed, Qi Nuoqiao's body trembled suddenly, she raised her head from Mo Fanlu's arms, looked at the door behind her, and said strangely: "Fan Lu, who just now Have you been here?" Mo Fanlu stood where he was and did not speak. Qi Nuoqiao turned her head to look at Mo Fanlu's face. She quietly observed the changes in the expression on his face, and tentatively asked as if she understood something, "Is that because she is here?" Mo Fanlu still didn't speak. Qi Nuoqiao smiled and tugged at the corner of his clothes: "Change your clothes and go after her." His eyes flickered suddenly, he turned his eyes sideways, and saw Qi Nuoqiao took out the luggage bag under the bed and found out his clothes, then walked over and handed them to him. Mo Fanlu was startled, frowned and asked in a low voice: "What do you mean..." "Don't you remember?" Qi Nuoqiao paused, then continued, "On the day you took the sleeping pills, you called me, but you didn't call me by my name." "what……" "The name you called is 'Ban Xia'." It’s just that I fell in love with you from the first time I saw you, and there was a feeling of “it’s not you, I can’t do it”, and I can deeply re-experience that feeling until now. In fact, I’m just afraid of being abandoned by you. In fact, I’m just afraid that you can’t like me like you The fact that you like me like that is because I'm too fragile, because I'm too willful, because I can't feel the mournful cry from the depths of your heart. Can I still get your forgiveness? I am like this, am I not qualified to look at you again? Such me, such a timid and sad me. When Mo Fanlu chased him out of the hospital, he couldn't find Su Banxia anywhere.Panting heavily, he looked around, only the street lamps flickered dimly in the darkness. Occasionally, a figure would brush past him, but it wasn't Su Banxia. He couldn't find Su Banxia, ​​and he couldn't find Su Banxia anywhere, beside the empty road, the familiar song "If you go away" was playing in the audio shop. Mo Fanlu listened to the song in a daze, raised his hand, and suddenly covered his eyes. Tears flowed down from his eyes like that, scalding hot, and all fell on the back of his hand, as if it could burn the skin severely. ——If you go away on the summer day. ——Then you might as well take the sun away. When I realized that you really liked me, it was too late. Are there always going to be a lot of sorrows, a lot of reversals in our lives? Has something we desperately held in our hands already disappeared when we desperately held it? So, if one day, our eyes are blinded by sudden darkness, can we still see the original light again? The original, unchanging light. Sometimes, I thought I could be saved when I met you, but what I didn't know was that you couldn't even save yourself. Summer is coming to an end. Then this summer will slowly fade into the background like all summers before. disappear behind. It was that night that something even more unexpected happened - Zhiwei's father and mother divorced. When Zhiwei returned home in a daze, she opened the door, and the room was completely dark. She turned on the light, and saw her mother slam the door and stay silent in the room.While her father was packing her suitcase expressionlessly, Zhiwei thought her father was going on a business trip, so she walked up to her and asked in a trembling voice, "Dad, when will you come back this time? Do... remember to tell me Local specialties." 可是父亲只是悲伤地望了她一眼，然后提起箱子径直地走出了家门。 栀薇也不知道是为什么，她只是迅速地追了出去，她的心里感到了强烈的不安，直到她追到楼下，看到父亲拦下了一辆出租车。栀薇发疯一般地跑过去拉住父亲，睁圆了眼睛喃喃地问道：“你……不想要我和妈了？” 父亲没有回答，只是狠狠地推开了她，然后坐到车子里面说了声“走吧”，出租车便在一片滚滚的灰尘之中扬长而去。 栀薇愣在原地，黑暗之中，她颤抖着手指掏出手机，一边痛哭一边拨下了苏半夏家里面的电话。 “嘟嘟”的忙音过后，是苏半夏的祖母接起了电话，她听着栀薇泣不成声的喊着“半夏在吗……我找半夏……”，然后不耐烦地丢给她一句：“烦什么烦，我怎么知道她死哪里去了！” 手机从栀薇的手中跌落到了地面上，发出沉闷的声响。 栀薇沉默地站在地面上，伸出手，捂住了脸。 原来，曾经美好的一切就像是在玩堆积木的游戏，一旦堆错了一块积木，那么本来已经很高很高的积木城堡便会因为这错误的一块而全部轰塌，再也回不到原来的美好了。 我再也不玩堆积木了，我再也不要玩那么残忍的游戏了。 实在太可怕了。