Chapter 33 Chapter Thirty-Three There Are Retributions!

Unexpectedly, the nanny walked in with Cheng'er in her arms, she knelt down in front of me and said in surprise, "Empress Empress, the crown prince called the word 'mother' today!" I couldn't believe it when I heard it. I was surprised and happy, and hurriedly asked, "Really? Really?" The nanny nodded again and again, "Yes, empress, although I don't know very well, it is indeed the word 'mother'!" I happily hugged Cheng'er, and now he could be supported to stand up, I said to him: "Cheng'er, call me mother." But Cheng'er just looked left and right, babbling, and then opened his mouth a few times but didn't say anything.

I feel a little sorry that I didn't hear him speak for the first time. Looking at the little man who was struggling to stand in front of him, with a fat and tender face, black and white eyes full of innocence, babbling words escaped from his mouth from time to time, as if he was very content with himself.He was wearing a slightly loose golden baby clothes embroidered with dragons, with a silver long life lock hanging around his neck, which rang with crisp bells as he moved, very rich and lovely.I held him in my arms, stroking his soft fetal hair, feeling his small and soft body, with such love and compassion in my heart.

I lowered my head and looked at Cheng'er who was playing with the jade pendant on my waist tenderly, and said to him silently in my heart: Cheng'er, you need to grow up quickly. Then he couldn't help but smile slightly, wondering if he could hear you calling me mother when he wakes up tomorrow morning. However, that night, I heard thunder rolling in my sleep, and I vaguely thought this was the first thunderstorm this summer. Then I heard a series of panicked footsteps outside the house, the door of my room was pushed open, and then Shanshan called me hastily at the door: "Miss..."

I opened my sleepy eyes and found Shan Shan Ruyi and other palace servants standing in front of my bed holding dark red lotus lanterns. At this time, there was another huge thunder outside, which instantly illuminated the whole room brightly. With this red and white flickering, Shan Shan's face is extremely frightening. I looked at her in surprise, still a little confused, but I heard Shanshan's terrified voice, "Miss, the prince, the prince has an accident!" I ran out without even a coat and bare feet. I couldn't think on the way, I just kept telling myself that Cheng'er will be fine, that nothing will happen, these slaves love to make a big fuss, and I have to punish them when I go back...

I slammed the door open, only to see a roomful of people kneeling on the ground crying bitterly. I shouted angrily: "It's okay, why are you crying in despair! The prince is sick, please go to the imperial doctor!" The nanny hugged Cheng'er and knelt in front of me, she fell at my feet and wept bitterly and said, "Empress, the little prince, he has passed away!" There was a loud thunder outside, I stared at her with wide eyes, "I can't hear what you said..." The nanny repeated again, choked with sobs: "Just now, the little prince's complexion turned blue, and his whole body was convulsed, and then, then,...he died!"

I snatched Cheng'er back from her arms, kicked her away, and said angrily: "You are talking nonsense! If you dare to talk nonsense, I will kill you!" The nanny fell to the ground, crying blindly. I hugged Cheng'er, startled for a moment, then coaxed him softly as usual and said: "Cheng'er, are you feeling sick again? You little guy always makes people feel restless...Are you afraid of thunder?" , the queen mother is here..." However, Cheng'er was stiff in my arms and didn't respond. My heart skipped a beat, and I hugged him tightly, but said with a smile on my face: "What's the matter? Cheng'er, are you asleep? Do you feel at ease with your mother holding you? Then the mother will sing you a song to coax you How about falling asleep..."

I patted him and hummed softly, with a smile on my face the whole time. Everyone in the room looked up at me blankly, so quiet, so quiet, only my soft singing and the occasional thunder outside could be heard. At this time, the emperor walked in quickly, followed by the terrified imperial doctors. He asked eagerly: "How is Cheng'er? The imperial doctors hurry over and have a look." I made a booing gesture at the emperor, and whispered, "Cheng'er is asleep. Your Majesty, let's not wake him up. If you wake him up, he's going to cry again..." The emperor looked at me in confusion, he stepped forward, gently grasped Cheng'er's little hand, his expression changed, and then put his hand in front of Cheng'er's nose, his face turned pale unconsciously.

"Aifei, he's dead..." My body trembled, I controlled myself to stand firmly, and said to the emperor with a smile: "What are you talking about, Your Majesty..." The emperor looked at me in pain, rubbed my body, and said to me word by word: "Nuxi, he is dead, his hands are cold..." "Impossible, Cheng'er just fell asleep, his body was still heated just now, if you don't believe me, let the imperial doctors take a look..." The leading doctor Miao stepped forward cautiously, felt his pulse and breathed, then bowed and whispered, "May the empress express my condolences..."

"You lied to me..." I repeatedly shook my head in denial. "Nuxi, don't be like this, you already know...otherwise why are you crying..." My hand unconsciously stretched out to the corner of my eye, and it was already wet. I turned to look at Cheng'er in my arms and shook him, "Cheng'er, wake up and show them that you are still alive, aren't you? Tomorrow will be your first year old, and it has been said that a one-year-old child will be healthy and healthy." Growing up in a healthy way, you are the prince of Dayin Kingdom, you must be blessed with great fortune..."

Then Cheng'er just turned pale and remained motionless. I ruthlessly pinched him, but he still didn't respond. I shook Cheng'er more vigorously, and said loudly: "Cry, Cheng'er, cry, don't you always like to cry, why don't you cry..." However, no matter how I called him, Cheng'er just lay in my arms with a pale face. The tears could no longer be controlled, and I lay limp on the ground and his body trembled uncontrollably, but I couldn't make any sound. I know, he's dead, he's dead! I knew it, I knew it from the moment I hugged him. But I would rather I was wrong, I would rather he was asleep, but why do you wake him up, let him sleep a little longer, you are so cruel...

The emperor stepped forward to help me, my body shrank as if I was scalded, suddenly I made a shrill sound, picked up Cheng'er and rushed out the door. It was raining heavily outside, with lightning and thunder. I rushed into the rain with Cheng'er in my arms, and my whole body was soaked wet in an instant. I knelt in the courtyard, hugged Cheng'er tightly, and shouted to the sky: "God, you are unfair! You are unfair! There is a wrong and a debt, a child under the age of one is so innocent! What did he do wrong, you Take his life so early! It is my slave who should be punished, what has it to do with him? What has to do with him?!" A burst of lightning struck, followed by another roar of thunder. I laughed wildly while weeping, "Cheng'er is already dead, why should I be afraid? God, you have taken away my most precious thing. Is there anything I miss in this world? Is there anything else I am afraid of? God, you are responsible I...you blame me!" I complained loudly, exhausting my last bit of strength, my voice was so hoarse that I could no longer make a sound, I suddenly felt that my eyes went dark, I couldn't hold it anymore, and passed out in the pouring rain. Even... even the cause of Cheng'er's death could not be found out. I slumped on the bed with a pale face, and deep sorrow remained in my heart. I don't even know how my own baby died, what a motherfucker I am... At this time, I especially miss Grandma Yao. If she is here, maybe there will be a solution, but thinking of her words before she died, I think, even if she is still alive, I would have no face to go to her. The emperor pointed to the palace people who knelt down and served Cheng'er and said angrily: "You killed my prince, I can't find the culprit, and I want you to be buried together!" Shan Shan Ru Yi and the others were roughly dragged down by the guards who led the charge to rush in, while I leaned on the couch and looked at them coldly and indifferently. "Miss..." Shanshan suddenly called out sadly. I trembled all over, slid down weakly, covered myself with the quilt, and cried helplessly, with an almost inaudible voice, "Let them go... I don't know who it is, I don't know..." Later, Cheng'er made it known to the world on the grounds of her sudden illness, and big drops of tears flowed down from my eyes, no matter how much I wiped them, I kept wiping them away. Cheng'er, mother doesn't even know who harmed you, and she can't even avenge you... She thinks she is extremely smart and powerful, so everything is nothing, nothing. "Miss, the little prince is about to be buried, please don't do this..." Shanshan persuaded me from the side while weeping. I hugged Cheng'er's body tightly and didn't let go. Jusi came out at this time and said in a deep voice: "Empress, if the little prince is not buried in time, he will become a lonely ghost and will not be able to reincarnate for the rest of his life..." I was taken aback for a moment, and in this moment of loosening, the palace people snatched Cheng'er over, and were about to walk out while holding her. I ran forward, and the palace servants pulled me from behind, trying to persuade me, and during the tugging, I broke the longevity lock on Cheng'er's body. In the end, I watched Cheng'er's little stiff body disappear into the sky with tears in my eyes. In sight. Cheng'er's clothes were also burned, saying it was to prevent his ghost from finding its way home. The longevity lock turned into Cheng'er's last relic, I didn't eat or drink, I just rubbed it every day, thinking of Cheng'er, I often fainted from crying. Shanshan's own eyes were already red and swollen, but she persuaded me from the side: "Miss, please be sorry..." I murmured and told myself repeatedly: "I'm not sad, I'm not sad..." But tears were already streaming down my face, and I couldn't help crying, "How can I not be sad..." I threw myself into Shanshan's arms, the corners of my mouth twitched and I could only bite her robe, "Shan, Cheng'er is dead, my child is dead, I haven't even heard him call me mother... ...then... died..." A month later, I called my nanny to come to me. At that time, my whole body was already extremely weak, and I needed someone to support me even when I was sitting on the couch. I said to the nanny kneeling below in a weak voice: "The little prince is dead, and the palace can no longer accommodate you... You can go out of the palace with these silver taels to live..." The nurse had tears on her face, she seemed to be ready to die, at this time she asked in surprise: "Empress, you don't want to kill slaves?" I slowly shook my head, "Everyone doubts you, but I know it's not you... Your dedication to Cheng'er is not in my eyes..." What's more, after probing you so many times, you already had many chances to kill Cheng'er, so you wouldn't wait until now.The murderer wants to divert attention through you, how can I let him do so. The nanny fell to the ground and cried bitterly, "Empress, the servant is also guilty, the servant did not take good care of the little prince..." I watched and heard her mention Cheng'er, and couldn't help crying again, "It's because my son died, and I don't want your son to have no mother..." As I spoke, my words choked up, " Nanny, in fact, this palace has always envied you...very jealous of you..." Finally, when the nanny left, I couldn't help but stopped her again, and asked expectantly: "Nurse, can you pronounce the word 'mother' in Cheng'er clearly?" The nanny was already sobbing, but she just nodded her head vigorously, wiped her tears and replied: "It's clear, the name of the little prince is so clear..." I leaned back exhaustedly, with a slight smile on my face, but I tasted an extremely salty taste at the corner of my mouth. I looked around and felt that the exquisite and luxurious utensils in the past exuded bursts of hostility, and it was the first time I realized that this was such a cold place. I thought about the palace people around me one by one, Shanshan, Ruyi, Chuzi, Cusi, Xingdan, Huaspipai, Jingming... Who exactly are they.Thinking of this, my body couldn't help shivering, and I curled up on a corner of the bed with my arms around my body. I don't know... Whoever it is, Cheng'er is dead. It turns out that the unfathomable is the human heart, so unfathomable... No matter how I do my calculations, I still... can't figure it out. That murderer has been lurking by my side for so long, but the first strike was a fatal blow, and then he stood still and hid himself. Cheng'er died miserably, but I, a mother, was powerless to avenge him. I hated myself so much. In the pain of such guilt, I lay sick in bed and didn't think about food and drink. I only washed my face with tears every day, and lost weight quickly.The affairs of the harem no longer have the energy and energy to take care of it. It must be known that the concubines in the harem are secretly gloating. The emperor comes to Fengyi Palace to see me every day, bringing all kinds of strange and exquisite playthings to make me happy. When he spread a gorgeous double-sided brocade in front of me, like a long piece of gorgeous cloud blooming in front of my eyes, it made my eyes hurt. He teased me with a smile and said, "Does Aifei like it? It seems that Aifei hasn't made new clothes for a long time. I remember that you used to change one every day... This time, let the brocade department do a good job of making a few new styles. " Seeing my expressionless expression, he grabbed my hand and let it slide over the fabric, saying: "Look at this fabric is as smooth as jade, it matches Aifei's delicate body..." Then he excitedly said Flipping over the other side of the fabric, he explained: "The strangest thing about this piece of cloth is that it looks different from the front and the back...it's interesting." My heart was shocked, front and back... Isn't this just like the murderer who is still hiding in Fengyi Palace.Your majesty, how can you be so nonchalant and make me happy? "My dear concubine, why are you crying again?" Big drops of tears fell down unstoppably, wetting small pieces of brocade. With tears in my eyes, I looked up at the emperor, with grief and indignation in my heart. Our child is dead, why can you still laugh? The emperor wanted to stretch out his hand to embrace me with pity, but I avoided it with obvious disgust. The emperor was startled, his face was a little embarrassing, and he persuaded: "Aifei, you have been like this for more than two months, and you can't be so sad all the time..." I stared at the emperor, and said: "The emperor has many children, but there is only one concubine. The emperor can feel sorry or not be sad, but the concubine can't!" The emperor's expression changed, "No wonder you treat me like ice every time I come here, so you've been blaming me in your heart? Cheng'er is also my son, how could I not feel sorry for him? But the child can't be resurrected after death, and I still care about Jiangshan Sheji, what do you want me to do? You refused to let me kill those servants, but now you show me face like this, it is really unreasonable..." As he was talking, he suddenly stopped, sighed, tried to calm his anger, and then said to me calmly: "I know you are very sad, but you can't just keep being self-willed." Then he pretended He coaxed me easily and said: "Okay, okay, how about we have another child after you take care of your body?" I heard a deep sadness in my heart. Cheng'er is Cheng'er, and cannot be replaced by other people or other children, so I couldn't help sneering, "Did the emperor really feel sorry for Cheng'er? You always You don't want Cheng'er to be born, isn't Cheng'er dead now that you are relieved? Isn't it just as you wished?" The emperor's face turned red and then turned pale, he accused me and said, "What are you talking about?" "Your Majesty naturally understands my concubine's words." I said coldly, and then turned my head away from him. "Concubine is an ominous person who lost his son. Please come back, Your Majesty. You don't need to care, so just leave me alone." Mother, remember my child alone." The emperor was speechless in astonishment, he had never been rejected so forcefully. His voice was a little trembling, "Nuxi, what do you look like now? Look at your mother, she is so gentle, if she were, she wouldn't..." I couldn't help laughing sadly in my heart, it turned out to be like this... It turns out that you are really just using me to make up for the lack of my mother, but you don't know that in order to satisfy your selfishness that can't be realized at all, to me how much damage. It is not without hatred towards him, and this kind of resentment finally broke out uncontrollably after Cheng'er's death. I raised my head and found that the emperor's face was pale, and I said to him word by word: "Your Majesty, you are wrong, I am not my mother." In the end, I felt a deep sadness again, and I told him clearly: "If it were my mother, she would rather die than follow you..." The emperor's face changed again and again, and finally turned livid, and the shame and indignation that was nakedly exposed immediately turned into anger, "You are no longer gentle and cute... Whatever, whatever, as you wish, I will I will never step into this Fengyi Palace again!" The emperor was very angry and walked away. I stared blankly at the bright yellow figure disappearing from sight, knowing that I had lost everything from that moment on.But I don't regret what I said. I don't regret it, I've been forced to smile for so long, I'm tired. Cheng'er is dead, and I don't want anything. Later, the emperor did not step into Fengyi Palace again. Offending the emperor is offending the entire harem. No one dared to come to the door anymore, only Hui Xiuyi came to visit quietly a few times in the dead of night when there were few people. I fell out of favor, and it must be hard for her. There is no good tea to entertain her, I smiled wryly: "It seems that you voted for the wrong person at the beginning." She was taken aback for a moment, then shook her head, and said: "The concubine admires the empress's character." I smiled wryly again, then raised my head and said to her, "I can't bear you to be implicated by me. You should go to Concubine Shuxian more often, she is kind and generous, so she won't make things difficult for you." Hui Xiuyi looked a little ashamed, he hesitated to speak. I smiled slightly and said, "I don't blame you. Didn't you just want to hear what I said? I said, do you feel better in your heart? Do you feel less ashamed? It's nothing, besides you Still raising Zhuan Ming, you hope he can have a good environment, right? No matter what, don’t let the children be implicated for no reason, they are innocent.” Hui Xiuyi's eyes turned red, and she choked up and said, "Empress, you are really a person who can't be seen...but I really admire you from the bottom of my heart." I slowly shook my head, "I have nothing to admire... I have made many mistakes in the past, and I don't blame anyone in the current field, maybe it's just retribution." "Empress, please don't say that... If there is a place where the concubine can help in the future, the concubine will definitely do her best..." "As long as you can take good care of yourself, it's fine for Zhuan Ming to have a adoptive mother like you... But, Zhuan Fu has suffered..." I said sadly. When Zhuan Fu came back that day, his eyes were red, but he tried his best to hide it. How could I not notice, glanced at him, pretended to be casual and asked: "Have you been bullied?" Zhuan Fu's eye circles became more and more red, but he pursed his lips tightly and said stubbornly, "No." I lowered my head and whispered, "It's the empress who is sorry for you." But because of these words, he couldn't help but knelt in front of me and hugged me and cried loudly, "Mother, those concubines speak ill of you behind your back, my son, don't let them speak ill of you..." I shed tears and stroked his head lightly, feeling sour like never before. "The queen mother did bad things, and they said it was right, Fu'er, you don't need to complain about the queen mother..." Zhuan Fu suddenly stood up, wiped away his tears, his small face was full of determination, "Fu'er will grow up quickly and protect the queen." I was startled, I was moved, but I couldn't restrain the guilt, "As long as...you don't hate the queen mother..." I said softly. All food and clothing expenses in Fengyi Palace have been reduced. The luxury and hustle and bustle of the past are gone, and all that remains is poverty and poverty. The cold winter is coming, but the charcoal fire in Fengyi Palace has not been approved yet. I was put on a warm fur robe by the palace people to keep out the cold, but I saw the palace people shivering from the cold indoors, with red hands. I silently took off my fur robe and put it aside, Shanshan said in surprise: "Miss, be careful not to catch a cold." I smiled lightly, "Shan, I'm not afraid of the cold. It's not like I haven't experienced anything colder than this when I was young." Later, the eunuch next to the emperor came to Fengyi Palace once, not to look for me, but to pick up Hua Splash and become a talented person. It is no small honor for Gong'e to be favored overnight and be promoted to be a talented person. I couldn't stop sneering when I heard this, it turns out that the emperor also had times when he was angry and naive. Just because Hua Spianlei is a palace maid whom I have neglected, do you want to pamper her and show me? I have no love for you, so who do you favor and what does it have to do with me? But then Jingming also left with the flowers splashing tears. He said goodbye to me without shame: "Miss, although I am despised by others, you are really a person I admire, and I want to serve you faithfully all the time. But now you are willing to degenerate, and this servant can't stand it." This suffering. As long as you don’t push the slave into a hurry, the slave will not reveal anything without authorization, because it is not good for the slave himself, so please rest assured, miss..." I looked at him indifferently, as Jing Ming was a man, it didn't surprise me that he did so.I just said: "I won't keep you, but if you say something you shouldn't say, you should know what will happen to you." Jing Ming smiled, "At this time, Miss still has undiminished momentum, and this is what Jing Ming has always admired for you." He turned to leave, but finally turned his head and sighed regretfully, and said earnestly: "Miss, you really did something wrong this time. In the past, although you had the capital to be arrogant, the emperor promised you that you would not come after he said you would not come. You have cut your own way out. There is really no way to turn around in the future.” I didn't answer his words, but stared at him, and asked word by word: "Did Huaspilei kill Cheng'er?" Jingming was stunned for a moment, and said in surprise: "So Miss still has such thoughts? The person who killed the prince will definitely not suffer with you. Are you trying to force that person out with your own plight? But you don't think this way Is it too desperate? Miss, you did something wrong, because even if you can find out who the murderer is now, you will no longer be able to take revenge." He didn't answer my question, but with pity for me, he knelt down piously to me for the last time, and then left without nostalgia. Cheng'er is dead, and I am no longer in the mood to flatter the emperor with a false face.No matter what, no matter what the cost, the first thing I must know is who killed my child. Got it, even if we die together in the future... However, everything that should go has gone, and I finally had a profound experience at that time, what it means to be pushed down by everyone. I looked at Cusi and said to her calmly: "Fang'er, you go, I have nothing more to teach you..." I called her by her real name, she should understand that when my big tree fell, there would be no dodders, so why let them suffer with me. Cusi didn't answer, but got up and said: "What does the Empress want to eat tonight, I will ask the cook to make it." Now the daily meal is no longer random, she was clearly changing the subject, I unconsciously raised my voice and called her: "Fang'er..." Cusi shook her head, then knelt down in front of me again, and said respectfully: "The Empress has already taught the best to my servants." I was puzzled, and then I heard her explain to me solemnly: "Your Majesty taught me how to be a servant. After so long, the servants have also understood that the empress seems to be ruthless, but in fact she is the most affectionate person. Otherwise, you will not Falling out of favor with the Holy Majesty will not prevent the Emperor from executing all the servants in Fengyi Palace. The servants will not leave, and the servants are willing to serve the empress for the rest of their lives and be loyal to the empress forever." We actually had one of the best dinners we've had in recent memory that night. Chu Zi said with emotion: "It's been a long time since I ate such fresh vegetables..." Shanshan looked at Dodo suspiciously and asked, "Dodo, where did you get these?" Cusi explained to me: "Madam, do you still remember a young imperial chef you promoted before? He has always been grateful to Madam, and he also made this dish." I was very surprised, I didn't expect that my casual sentence before helped a little cook, and in the end it also helped me. I sighed, lowered my head and ate in silence again. At the beginning, the concubines in the harem still had a wait-and-see attitude and sent people to closely monitor every move of Fengyi Palace, but after a few months they were sure that the emperor would never come to Fengyi Palace again, I no longer take Fengyi Palace seriously. I flipped through the thick historical volumes, and for the first time, I was so curious about how the queens who were abandoned and neglected since ancient times spent their days. Shanshan's eyes were red again, and I said calmly, "Shanshan, there's nothing wrong with being like this now." I smiled indifferently, and said softly: "Really, Shan. After revenge, even if you leave with Cheng'er, there is nothing wrong with it..." I couldn't sleep for a long time, and I finally fell asleep for a while that day, but I heard the cry of a child in my sleep. I woke up with a start, got up and quickly asked, "Is Cheng'er crying?" Shanshan looked at me in confusion at first, then gradually his eyes became gloomy, and said to me: "Miss, that's the sound of a cat making a fuss..." I understand, there is an indescribable melancholy and sad feeling in my heart. I lay down again and said softly, "Really..." Huapilei is the emperor's new favorite, she loves cats, so the emperor specially asked people to raise many cats for her in the palace. I can imagine that Hua Splash is already very likable, and he can also read words and expressions. The emperor likes gentle women, is it because of this that he likes my mother, or is it because he fell in love with my mother that he takes this as the standard for women? It's just that I'm not that kind of person, before, it's all in disguise...but it doesn't matter anymore. I closed my eyes and murmured, "Cat, it's a traitor..." (twelve princes) News came from the capital that the young prince had died. The people around were all rejoiced and beaming with joy when they heard it. Yes, the little prince is dead, the incomparably noble little prince who was born with everything is dead. I was silent, but there was a faint pain in my heart, not for him, but for her.I don't know how she should grieve, if she is trying to hold back her tears... I clenched my fists and said, "Get ready for the carriage, I'm going to Beijing." Everyone was shocked, and my confidant Li Lang stopped in front of me and said calmly: "My lord, you can't go." My face sank, and I shouted, "Get out of the way!" However, he did not walk away, but said in a deep voice: "Your Majesty, if you enter the capital without an order, you will be accused of treason by outsiders! I am afraid that you will be escorted by the Imperial Army before your horses and chariots reach the city gate." stand up!" "Get out of the way, I can't control so much now, I will explain to the father when I enter Beijing..." Li Lang sneered, and said straight to the point: "How will the lord explain to the emperor? The death of the crown prince made you, an elder brother, worry?" I was speechless in a daze. Li Lang continued to say in a deep voice: "Take a ten thousand step back, if the prince is really for that palace man, he should act as if nothing happened, otherwise she might be implicated as well." I sat down dejectedly. At this time, an old aunt broke in and shouted: "My lord, Princess Yun is about to give birth!" I was shocked, but I just sat there without moving, and after a long time, I ordered: "Go over and take good care of me." A puzzled look appeared on the old aunt's face, and she asked, "My lord, are you not going?" I stood up and turned my back, and said wearily: "You all step back." Yun Nu is probably going to blame me. It's not that I don't worry about her, and it's not that I don't feel pain, but it's not one ten millionth of that person who is thousands of miles away. Nuxi, how are you doing now? I really want to run to your side immediately and hold you in my arms, but I am nothing and can do nothing. I can only wait, passively waiting for the arrival of the first day.Nuxi, please take good care of yourself and protect yourself. After an unknown amount of time, a figure stood outside the paper window and said: "My lord, Princess Yun just gave birth to her eldest son, mother and child are well." My heart moved, but I couldn't tell whether I was happy or sad. "Got it." I just said that. The figure outside hesitated for a moment, then continued: "My lord, Princess Yun is waiting for you to go and see the prince." After all, I felt sorry for Yun Nu in my heart, so I hesitated and opened the door. Yun Nu was lying on the bed with a pale face, thin sweat still oozing from his forehead, and he looked tired and haggard.But when she saw that I was still pushing myself up, she gave me a gratified smile and said, "My lord, it will be good if you come." With a pain in my heart, I sat beside her bed and helped her lie down. She lay down uneasy, and said aggrievedly: "I'm really afraid that you won't come..." Feeling guilty in my heart, I didn't speak, but just wiped the sweat from my forehead gently for her. She looked at me tenderly, and suddenly said cheerfully: "My lord, quickly take a look at our son." The nurse placed the newborn child in my arms. I looked at him carefully, but his small appearance reminded me of a slave child. She is suffering the loss of her son and I just had my firstborn. If having a child makes people so happy, then how sad should she be now. Thinking of this, seeing that the baby in my arms was boring, I hugged the baby to the nanny again, and said to Yun Nu apologetically, "I still have to be busy with political affairs, so I'll go back to the study first. Take a good rest, and if you need anything, just talk to me." The servant said." Yunnu stared at me blankly, and I turned and left under such gaze. Then I heard the nanny in the room say: "Why is the prince so cold, doesn't he like the youngest son?" Then he heard the panicked voice of the people in the room, "Princess, don't cry, crying in confinement is the root of the disease... ..." The moonlight is so bleak tonight, I looked up at the moon and slowly closed my eyes. Falling in love with someone I shouldn't love, but wanting to hurt someone who loves me... How sinful I am, but I do not know how to repent. There are still many days before the first day, so I set off early. Seeing his father, he showed a very happy expression, still smiling with relief as usual, as if nothing happened, but I think how could he not care about Nuxi in his heart. The father's body was getting weaker and weaker, and he asked me to visit the mother concubine without talking to me for a long time. The concubine mother chatted happily with me, and quickly asked: "Why don't you bring your grandson here? I really want to hug my little grandson... Ah, but it's true, such a small child can't help tossing, on the way It's not okay if something happens." I absent-mindedly agreed. Concubine Mu glanced at me, and then said, "How is Manyu? Don't treat her coldly. Even though Yunnu gave birth to the eldest son, his blood is not right... When will you have a son and concubine, you will really feel at ease." "Mother Concubine..." I called her from below with a little impatience. Concubine Mu was stunned for a moment, then lowered her head, took a sip of tea, sighed and said, "You are uneasy. Are you really thinking about Concubine Mother, as you said to your father, when you came back so early?" I can't answer. The concubine mother's words were a little harsher, and she said bluntly: "You are not allowed to go. Concubine mother does not allow you to go. Everyone says that she deserved what she deserved, and concubine mother does not allow you to step into this muddy water!" "Mother Concubine, Nu Xi is also something you have grown up with since childhood, how can you say such words?" Concubine Mu's complexion became very bad, she shook her head and said: "I don't care, I just know that everyone in Fengyi Palace avoids it, and I can't let you go to that dangerous place!" Later, the concubine mother sent someone to watch me closely every day. In desperation, I found Yuan Yao, who also looked worried. I asked him, "Is she okay?" He shook his head with a wry smile, and replied: "I don't know... I asked the palace servants around her, and I heard that she just sat quietly every day, didn't speak, and didn't know what she was thinking..." After listening to Mo Ran, I whispered for a long time: "She is suffering in her heart, she must be enduring it." There was deep sadness in Yuan Yao's eyes that couldn't be concealed, I suddenly looked up at him and said, "Yuan Yao, help me, I'm going to see her." Yuan Yao looked at me in surprise, my face was firm, and he nodded slightly. I told my father, mother and concubine that I would go hunting with Yuan Yao and prepare some mountain game for the Yuan Day banquet. With the approval of my father, I first went out of the palace with Yuan Yao and his party in a grandiose manner, but on the way, I took off the prince's attire and changed into the eunuch's robe, and then pretended to be Yuan Yao's order quietly. Return to the palace. I looked at the old red servant robe on my body, and couldn't help but wryly smiled. Remembering when I was a child, Nuxi always yelled for me to put on the eunuch's robe to show her, I was deeply ashamed, but I didn't promise her this matter, I didn't expect to have the opportunity now. I walked quickly on the way to Fengyi Palace with my head bowed like a eunuch, always on guard, and thinking in my heart how I should respond if I meet someone, but I didn't expect that all of this was unnecessary . The more people go in the direction of Fengyi Palace, the less people there are. No, I didn't meet anyone. My heart was sore, but my steps were getting faster and faster, I really wanted to see her sooner. Finally arrived at Fengyi Palace, I unconsciously took a deep breath and walked in. The courtyard is empty, but not barren, and it can be vaguely seen that someone has carefully cleaned it every day. I went up the steps, and on the verandah, I met a maid holding a shallow basin. She was taken aback, and then shouted: "Who?! What are you doing here?" I have never seen this maid before, so I couldn't answer for a while. At this time the door was pushed open, and it was Shanshan who came out. She first looked at the maid and asked, "What's the matter, Cuss?" 那名叫菟丝的宫娥看着我，善善顺着她的目光看过来，一愣一惊，然后回味过来，眼中渐渐有了泪，“王爷，您总算来了，我家小小姐，她，好苦啊。” 我环视着室内的四周，依如往日的奢华，但却是清清冷冷的，毫无生气。 那个一向心高气傲的人儿是如何忍受这份冷清的呢？ 终于素色绣红梅的帘幕后面传来了衣服轻微的窸窣声，她走了出来，静静地坐在我面前。 我的视线随她而动，看不清她的脸，只能盯着她影影绰绰的身姿。 隔着一层薄薄帘幕我们互相默默地望着彼此，善善她们也悄悄地离开了。 良久她轻轻地说：“恭贺你喜得长子……” 心中涌起一股恼怒，我起身掀开帘子，沉沉地说：“我不是来听你说这种话的！” 她一瞬间变了脸色，连忙转过头去想要逃遁，我急着上前将她稳稳的扯在怀中。 她举起袖袍遮住自己的脸，惊恐地说：“别看我，我一定……变得很丑很丑了……” 我抱着她，不可置信地看着她，她的身体竟然变得如此瘦削单薄，感受不到丝毫重量，仿佛随时都会变为一缕青烟随风而去…… 心中又酸又涩又痛，不禁用力地抱紧她，将自己埋在她的肩膀，良久哽咽出声：“奴兮，你别这样，我心疼……” 她的身体轻轻地颤抖着，有冰冷的液体滴到了我的手背上，她轻轻抽泣着说：“你不该来的……不该来的……” 我恼急起来，“奴兮，我只让让你好好的、好好的想想你自己！” “想想我自己吗……”她良久喃喃地说，声音是那样的细微，带着隐隐的哭泣声，“虽然知道你不应该来，却有一点点盼着你来……想着我们小时候，无忧无虑的日子……多好……” 她终于回头望我，眼中噙着泪水晶莹剔透，顺着苍白的脸流过一道泪痕，那样的憔悴，那样的楚楚可怜，让我心痛。 我将她的头靠在我的肩上，将她紧紧地抱在怀中，紧紧地再也不舍得放手。 那一天，让我日思夜想让我魂断梦牵让我要爱一辈子的女人在我怀中。 她的长发如同黑缎子般披散开来，放出阵阵的芳香。 我努力撑起身子，只是怕压坏身下那娇弱的人儿。 她在我身下断断续续的呻吟，在我听来更像是嘤嘤的哭泣，我轻轻地为她拭去眼角的泪水，“奴兮，别哭……” 她小声而可怜地叫了一声：“十二皇子……” 我深深地凝视着她，说：“奴兮，叫我的名字……” 她睁开泪水朦胧的眼睛，怯怯地叫了一声：“颛闵……” “颛闵……” “颛闵……” 这样只是听着她这样唤我的名字，我的身体就抑制不住的冲动起来，每一次不知疲倦的占有，莫大的欢愉过后有隐隐的心痛，恨不得就此将她揉入身体，保护她，让她不再哭泣。 她半裸在凌乱的衣袍中，大滴大滴的眼泪从她的眼中流溢出来，一滴滴的悉数落在席上。 我怜惜地看着她，轻轻地吻上她的额。 “以后不要来了吧……”然后她伸手掩上了脸，哭道：“会被五马分尸……” “不，”我急忙的说，“无论怎样，我都……” 她伸出手压住我的唇阻止我说下去，缓缓摇了摇头，一字一字的对我说：“忘了吧，就当是梦……全都……忘了吧。” 我怅然若失。 仿佛一切都不曾发生过，难道真的是梦吗？ 然而她的发香却还在指间萦绕，挥之不去。 如果真的是梦，那又该是怎样的梦…… 当几个月后听到奴兮又有宠的消息，我陷入了沉默。 心中剩下浓郁的哀伤夹杂着不可抑制的愤怒，我在心底质问着，奴兮你到底要怎样呢？父皇那样伤了你的心，最终却还要投入他的怀抱吗？ 那么我们的那一次又算是什么。奴兮，我不懂你，真的不懂了…… 后来再次奉诏入宫时，她出现在飘逸的帘幕之后，隆起的腰身若隐若现。 她温柔地抚着自己的肚子，轻柔地叹了口气，然后转身对我说：“十二皇子，等他出生了教他好吗？” 我抬头吃惊地看着她，看见她微微笑着的脸庞。