Chapter 4 4. Confinement

For Huang Chang in 1935, two major events happened.One is the death of the famous movie star Ruan Lingyu, and the other is the return of his mother Zhao Yifan. Huang Erye Jiaqi is a theater fan in Beijing and a movie fan in Shanghai. He has been tossing about making movies and promoting stars for a while. The major movie theaters are a little bit involved. It premiered on Broadway in 1930, the Cathay Pacific Cinema was built in 1932, and the new Da Guangming opened in 1933. The theater manager sent someone to send invitations to Huang Erye to invite him to the ribbon-cutting ceremony. In those few years, Huang Chang followed his father and watched many movies. This was the only place where the father and son speculated, and it was also the only warm thought that Huang Chang had for his father when the father and daughter turned against each other in the future.

In fact, after careful study, Huang Erye’s knowledge was originally very complicated and interesting: he knew the origin of the naming of every city gate in Beijing and their respective rules, he knew the cloaked heads of hundreds of schools, and he knew that he had to go out of Xuanwumen to win the battle. When you go back to the court, you have to enter Deshengmen, the wine carts go through Chongwenmen, the water carts go through Xizhimen, the grain carts must go through Qihuamen, and the dung carts must pass through Houzaimen. I know that Wang Jinlong in "Yutangchun" wears red Guan Yu in "The Ancient City Club" wears a green dragon python, Liu Xiu in "Strike the Gold Brick" wears a yellow dragon python, Zhou Yu in "The Meeting of Heroes" wears a white dragon python, and Xiang Yu wears a black dragon python. The black-faced old bag in the book is a dragon and python with the word "Fu". There is also a golden flower in the gauze hat, which is the new champion, and a gauze hat with wings is transformed into a prince. Qiao is the princess, and he can still tell who is Mu Guiying, who is Qin Xianglian, who is White Snake and who is Su San just by the clothes he wears...

The only thing he lacks is the ability to make money.However, in the era when all kinds of things are being abandoned and all kinds of wastes are being prospered, this can barely be explained as being time-weary and avoiding the world.Among the descendants of Qing nobles, there are many people like Huang Erye, who have long been regarded as trivial, but those who are looking for jobs everywhere, but the position is not high or the salary is not right, they will be ridiculed instead, and they will be regarded as betrayal or Condescending, for example, Uncle Huang Jiafeng was scolded by Yifan in public at the Beijing ancestral hall, but no one resolved it, this is the reason.

There are a lot of time to stay at home, so the second master will inevitably talk to his daughter when he is interested. He can talk about everything from various schools of thought to hundreds of flowers in Shanghai, and the one who talks the most is naturally the second master who is most interested in it. movies and movie stars too. At that time, Shanghai was in the heyday of movies. People’s conversations were inseparable from movies, and their dressing habits also imitated movies. Even the entire living space in Shanghai was a huge movie theater. Everyone’s words and deeds were more or less Instinctively, with the atmosphere of the movie, unconsciously prolonging the voice to read a sentence or two of the movie dialogue, adding a romantic movie color to the most everyday conversation, you will become the protagonist in the movie.

All the rich people want to squeeze into the movie industry to earn huge profits, all the beauties dream of becoming movie stars, all the ordinary citizens pay attention to the gossip in the movie industry in the newspapers, and all the streets are covered with posters with the latest hairstyles of movie stars , and all gatherings must use star news as an after-dinner talk.Jiaqi's knowledge about the film industry was acquired through reviewing the past and gaining new insights in this way. "Wang Renmei is not good-looking, her smile lines are too deep, she is not as good as Hu Die, but Hu Die is not as good as Ruan Lingyu." Jiaqi said, puffing a cigarette leisurely, "A few days ago, I heard from a friend that Ruan Lingyu is now with Tao Jize, which made Zhang Da Minsheng got angry and said that he wanted to announce the secrets of the Ruan family to his friends and reporters. There was an uproar. In fact, what is there to make a fuss about? It’s not just those years when a movie star said, “Since ancient times, a hero is like a beauty, and the world is not allowed to see gray hair.” After a few years, nothing is new, and if you want people to pay attention to you and actively sell news to others, maybe no one will write about it.”

Usually it's always by the second master's cigarette couch, usually in the afternoon, but the softness of the smoke lamp always makes people feel that dusk is coming, everything will not last long, and it feels that it is already late and it is too late to do anything, so there is no need to worry about it. Huang Chang stood obediently beside the cigarette couch, burning cigarettes for his father, while taking the opportunity to ask questions.She was fascinated by the stories of the ancestors of the Huang family, and was curious about news about movie stars in Shanghai.Those are all distant, brilliant, and confusing, forming a world of their own.

However, Second Master Huang probably felt that his family’s decline had disgraced his ancestors, and he had never had the patience to talk about the old affairs of the Huang family. Take a look." He never tires of asking about entertainment news in Huajie and Liuxiang, and talks to his daughter as soon as he hears the news. "As for Ruan Lingyu, I met once at the opening ceremony of the movie theater a few days ago, and asked her to dance. She is quite a gentle and sensible person, but knowing that she has a lot of news, I don't dare to solicit too much, for fear of being involved. Go in the right and wrong." He laughed as he said it, probably feeling that he might be involved in celebrity scandals is not a capital.

"Didn't Ruan Lingyu divorce Zhang Damin? What else can I say?" Like most female students at the time, Huang Chang's favorite movie star was Ruan Lingyu.She is a standard movie fan. Whenever there is a new movie released in Shanghai, she will have a sneak peek without eating or drinking.She is familiar with all of Ruan Lingyu's movies, and can retell the lines from beginning to end in a good sentence.No matter what her father said or what was written in the tabloids, she just liked Ruan Lingyu and couldn't help but fight for her. Huang Erye took a puff of cigarette, and said in a drawn-out tone: "It's because of the divorce that I have something to say, such as why the divorce, what was it like before the divorce, and what was it like after the divorce, Ruan Lingyu is famous. Well, anything can be used to sell news. The main reason is that Ruan Lingyu had married Tao Jize before divorcing Zhang Damin, but Tao Jize is not a good person. If you make a fuss, you'll still be a child for others, but you'll get a divorce for nothing."

"Ruan Lingyu won't, she is so noble, all of this must not have come from her original wish." "Who knew? As female celebrities, they naturally have to put on an air of aloofness, but it's not the same in their bones. They all need money." "Ruan Lingyu won't do it." Huang Chang insisted, with the usual stubbornness in his eyes.The smog is misty, and everything seems to be true or false.She read her father's words, "Then Tao Jize is not a good thing. He used to have a wife in his hometown. Ruan Lingyu made troubles, and she was still a child, but the marriage was for nothing." pain.

She likes Ruan Lingyu to the point of loving her, and she defends her as a belief.When her father scolded Ruan Lingyu, it was as if she was scolding herself.Although she didn't know at that time, what kind of origin Ruan Lingyu's fate and her own confirmed each other.But in her heart, she really had an ominous premonition. When the new film "New Women" was released, Huang Chang watched it three times in one go.When I watched it for the third time, it was a rainy day. After watching it, I took the tram back to school.In my memory, it seemed that it was very rainy in Shanghai during that time, and the sky was smoky and misty from morning to night, varying from hour to hour, sometimes dense and sometimes sparse.

The ancients liked to compare rain to lyrics. If light rain is a small order, then heavy rain is a long tune, right?Is it "Water Tune Getou"? ? "Witch Hazel"?Or "Slow Voice"? The tram is driving "Kedakda", passing long songs and short tunes, passing willows with light smoke, passing lights and feasting, driving past powder and fat... They don't know that a peerless beauty is going, and a sad, mournful, and lingering story will end in this rainy season, like the bright red under the peach blossom tree after the strong wind. But Huang Chang knew it, looking at the rain outside the window, thinking of Ruan Lingyu in the film, shed tears unconsciously.In the endless rain and the sound of "Keda", she deeply felt the endless loneliness of life, and she seemed to have foreseen something. Sure enough, on the next day, the news that Ruan Lingyu committed suicide was published in the newspaper, and the method she used was the same as that of the heroine Wei Ming in the film—suicide by taking poison, and after more than ten hours of death. Struggling in pain, tossing and dying. Such a flower-like age, a flower-like appearance, and a flower-like reputation, they were all gently discarded, withered like a flower, in this rainy season with heavy wind, cold and fog. The lament of "human words are terrible" in the suicide note was like a desolate gesture, which made Huang Chang feel a heart-piercing shock and a bone-chilling cold.Holding the newspaper, the long and long "Keda" sound of the tram suddenly sounded in her ears again. She didn't understand that if a gorgeous person like Ruan Lingyu had a barrier to pass, how could a weak girl like herself, who was walking on thorns and thorns, have a barrier to pass? , isn't it even more hopeless?The right and wrong words of some people like father can really kill people? For a girl of cardamom age, sometimes the death of faith is almost equivalent to the arrival of the end of the world.Ever since his mother left home, Huang Chang got used to looking around with suspicious eyes, which once made his stepmother Sun Peilan very uncomfortable, and cursed behind her back, "Only the eyes of a dead fish can be as terrifying as hers." Now, her eyes are even more indifferent, full of distrust and restlessness. Ruan Lingyu's death was like a bucket full of gray paint poured over her head, imprinting a kind of gray on Huang Chang's entire girlhood.From then on, she became more taciturn, more bookish, and even more isolated from her father, because in her opinion, his father was also one of the murderers who drove Ruan Lingyu to death.She originally matured earlier than the average girls of the same age, but now she suddenly lost all immaturity and innocence. She began to firmly believe that the greatest tragedy in the world is that a talented woman got involved in marriage and love for no reason. At this time, Zhao Yifan came back to China. After years of not seeing each other, the reunion of mother and son after a long absence is no different from the New Year's event for the Huangshang siblings. That day coincided with the weekend, and Huang Chang was at home on vacation. When she got up early in the morning, Mama Lin and Mama Cui dressed up for the young lady and master, and wanted to send them to the aunt's house to meet their mother.While brushing Huangdi's hair, Mama Lin asked, "Do you still remember what your mother looks like?" Huang Di nodded shyly, even when he was very excited, his face was still pale.Because he has been studying in a private school and has been sick for many years, he can see very limited things in the world, and the difference with his sister Huang Chang is getting bigger and bigger. This was Zhao Yifan's mistake. He originally thought that in the Huang family, where men were preferred to women, as the young master, Huang Di would have no problems studying.Unexpectedly, since Huang Jiaqi remarried, he has ignored family affairs at all, and has turned a blind eye to his son and daughter for a long time. Ask, everything will be taken care of by the new second grandmother, Sun Peilan.So Huang Di studied with Mr. Private School for many years, and even finished memorizing the jerky ones, but he still didn't go to school.Mr. Lian also hesitated to know what to teach next year, and wondered whether the next step would be to practice eight-legged essays as well. Huang Chang tried on the clothes and was dissatisfied. He whispered, "Why don't I wear school uniforms?" The school uniforms were made for everyone on a whim before Christmas last year, but later because some parents objected to this uniformity His clothes were abolished again, so there was only that one, and it was a little smaller, but it was still his own clothes. Mama Cui and Mama Lin looked at each other, and they agreed: Miss is old and sensible, why is she willing to wear her stepmother's old clothes to see her own mother?Without further ado, Yiyan opened the box and found the school uniform, sprayed water and ironed Huang Chang's clothes, and helped her to put them on properly. Just as she was about to go out, Sun Peilan got up, and the maid came in to ask Huang Chang and her brother to say good morning.Huang Chang was very unwilling to kowtow in front of his stepmother hypocritically at such a time, but he dared not not go, he only said that his hair was messed up, and his socks were short. , and barely stood up, accompanied by Mama Cui and Mama Lin, and walked to the Antang. Please An Hall is located in the East Wing, with the same specifications as a private school. It is the "office room" where Sun Peilan wakes up early and the director, and Huang Chang's sister and brother greet each other in the morning and evening.Sun Peilan has established a rule since the day she entered the house, every morning and evening, the whole room must report to the second master and her, and there will be heavy penalties for absence or lateness. In fact, it was the second master and her, but it was just a pretense that Huang Jiaqi usually couldn't get up until noon, so the "shouzaotou" was taken by the second grandma on her behalf. Every time Huang Chang kowtowed, he felt full of grievances.In Heiyaya's room, where the heads were kneeling all over the floor, she and her younger brother huddled in a corner, receiving the same treatment as a servant, which made her look even thinner.Because the servants have something to report, they are very busy and fulfilling, but her siblings are just kneeling and listening. When the servants have finished reporting, they can get up. That feeling clearly reminds him that the two of them are eating for nothing. . It stands to reason that the Huang family has a clear distinction between master and servant, and greetings are usually separated.But Sun Peilan said that the Huangshang siblings should know the hard work of running a family from an early age, and follow them to learn the rules, and Huang Jiaqi readily agreed.So the Huangshang siblings had no choice but to swallow their anger and suffer this "morning humiliation". Fortunately, Huang Shang was studying in a boarding school, and there was only one rule every weekend, so it was a little easier.And Huangdi was used to being oppressed since he was a child, and he accepted everything, so for a few years, everyone has lived in peace. But this morning, there should be something to do, and because Huang Chang was eager to see his mother and was full of impatience, he felt a hatred for asking Anping this morning.And because Sun Peilan couldn't stop her siblings from going to see her aunt (although she knew in her heart that everyone wanted to save her face, on the surface she only said she was going to see her aunt, but in fact she didn't want to meet Zhao Yifan, the former second grandmother who lived in Jiaxiu), But I didn't intend to let them go out happily. They were already holding back their energy to find fault, but Huang Chang brought a ready-made excuse to the door again. It didn't count that they were late, and they still had a face of reluctance. , and wearing an old school uniform that is neither gray nor blue, looking weird.She was originally three-pointed, but she became seven-pointed when they met, so she couldn't help snorting: "Whose lady is this, she only wants to get up when the sun is always high, and she is so sleepy, with sloppy shoes and sloppy socks, I don't know." You did something shameful last night, and you want to put a cover on your face! Go, go and change your clothes before you come back, I can't see your sour and fake jealous look." Huang Chang's face turned red when he heard this, and he was about to fight back.Cui's mother, who was following behind, was afraid that she would suffer, so she quickly pressed her head and said, "Kneel down quickly, and pay your respects to your mother." After talking, she put herself on the ground first, kowtowed and said, "Cui's mother, please pay respects to grandma." .” Lin Ma and Huang Di also knelt down afterward.Huang Chang had no choice but to kneel down and kowtow, but he couldn't hide the resentment and anger in his eyes, and Han Xing shot straight at his stepmother like a cold arrow. Sun Peilan was furious, and before Huang Chang could stand up, she poured a bowl of remnant tea on her noodles: "I'll give you the seeds of no conscience, I'll give you to eat and wear, and you still stare at your mother every day! Who taught you to follow me?" The elders just stare at people in a daze while talking? You are an uneducated thing! It is said that you are the eldest lady of the Huang family, dressed in a thousand pieces of gold and silver, and eat and drink with delicacies from mountains and seas, yet you actually feed such a thing! How can you be a lady? What do you look like? You look like a slut on the beach! You think my clothes are not good, and you deliberately wear a filial gown that is neither gray nor blue, and you will embarrass me! I don’t understand, look at your appearance How do you look like the Huang family? What kind of foreign school did you study in? I said it was a waste of money! It’s the rules of the country that you can’t learn, so what foreign rules are you going to learn? Which country’s rules taught you well? Now this ghostly look? Now that the wings are stiff, you know I’m staring at you, it’s against you! Mama Cui, pull her down, lock her in the room, and don’t eat at noon, tell her to reflect on herself, what should I do? Treat the elders. Bai Chang is such a big man, he doesn't even know how to be polite, he's like a fool!" The left sentence is "seed" and the right sentence is "thing". They scolded for an entire hour, and even the servants were stunned. , although he was fierce and aggressive in the past, he has never seen such unreasonable swearing, not like a grandma who behaves well, but like a daughter-in-law from a small family.In Huang's family, even ordinary servants rarely speak so vulgarly.So Cui's mother and Lin's mother looked at each other in blank dismay, and for a while ignored the second grandmother's order to pull the young lady down and lock her up. Sun Peilan was even more furious, she simply stepped down from her seat, and pointed her mouth at Cui's mother: "Are you deaf or dumb? Can't you hear me?" Cui's mother was so frightened that she knelt down again: "Miss has already asked the master to go to see my aunt today. Should I save the confinement lunch until tomorrow?" "Can you save shit until tomorrow? I said now is now. If she doesn't see me as a mother, I can beat her..." Huang Chang couldn't bear it anymore, and suddenly yelled: "You are not my mother, I'm going to see my own mother!" Jumping up, she was about to run outside. Sun Peilan yelled: "Back! Stop her and beat her! Hit her hard! Slap her on the mouth and ask her if she recognizes her mother?" The servant who stood at the door and obeyed the orders did not dare to disobey, so she stepped forward to stop Huang Chang, dragged her to Sun Peilan, and persuaded: "Miss, hurry up and admit your mistake to grandma, say that you know that you are wrong, don't dare anymore, So as not to suffer from flesh and blood." Mother Cui was so frightened that she just knelt on the ground to sift the chaff and seemed to be trembling. She hurriedly kowtowed: "I beg grandma to forgive me, I beg grandma to forgive my young lady for being ignorant, please grandma..." Sun Peilan kicked Mama Cui a somersault, and then stepped forward to give Huang Chang a slap in the face: "Tell me, do you see me as a mother now?" "You are not! You are not my mother! I have my own mother! My mother is back!" Huang Chang yelled stubbornly, and only said in his heart: You can kill me, you can kill me, and I won't I will call you mom again, I have my own mom, my mom is back, I will not call you a shrew mom again! "Your mother is back? Humph, let me tell you, even if she comes back late, she has to be a little girl, call me grandma, and carry my shoes and pour water for me!" "Bah! My mother lifts your shoes? You are not worthy to lift my mother's shoes! My mother is more beautiful than you, wiser than you, gentler than you, capable than you, wiser than you, and a hundred times stronger than you!" When Huang Chang said a word, Sun Peilan slapped him; the more Sun Peilan slapped, the more Huang Chang wanted to speak.Gradually, the corners of Huang Chang's lips cracked, and blood slowly oozes out.Cui's mother was crying, wanting to stop but not daring to stop, just knelt on the ground, muttering wordlessly: "I beg grandma to forgive me, please forgive me, miss, she is still young, not sensible..." Lin Ma sneaked to her side and pulled her skirt, and secretly whispered in her ear: "She won't answer if you beg here, but if you ask, it's better to ask the master." One sentence reminded Mama Cui, she peeped at Sun Peilan who was playing vigorously and couldn't notice, she quickly got up and ran out. Ordinarily, Sun Peilan was not ugly, with Fang Yi's round face, she didn't look like a late lady at all.The cruel woman in the legend usually has a pair of high cheekbones, but her face is very flat, as if Nuwa made a man out of clay, and then slapped her face on the face after making it. Her cruelty was all on the tip of her tongue, and every word was like a knife, which cut people's skin and blood.What's more, her nails were sharply trimmed. When she was tearing the yellow dress, she kept secretly exerting force, and when she pointed it down, there was a blood mark.Suddenly seeing the second master coming, he was no longer so aggressive, but preemptively, stepped forward and cried bitterly, because his face was so peaceful, he couldn't hold back the tears, and when he cried, the tears seemed to pour down, very tragic: "Jiaqi, Jiaqi, look at me, do you think it's hard for me to be a stepmother? You have to control food, control them, keep them from freezing and not getting hot, and even be scolded by them. Listen. What did your daughter say? She said that her mother came back, she didn’t recognize me, and wanted to drive me away, and said that her mother was a hundred times stronger than me, and that I was not worthy to carry shoes for her mother! Qi, I am careful, why did I raise a white-eyed wolf and come out! You two are trying to force me to death! Jiaqi, Jiaqi, if you say something, I will never leave the Huang family. Yes, if you welcome that Zhao back and tell me to leave, I will only die!" Huang Jiaqi was confused by the snotty and tearful words, and asked urgently: "Who said what? Who said that she was going to welcome her back? You are the second grandma Huang in this family. Who dares to drive you away? You Let her go first!" "It's her!" Pointing a finger at Huang Chang, Sun Peilan complained tearfully, "It's your good daughter! She said in front of the whole family that her own mother was coming back and let me go. Make room for her mother! Jiaqi, how can she have such a vicious heart as a little girl! Did you teach her to say these words? Otherwise, where did she get the courage to ride to I've got it on my head? Tell me, tell me, do your grandparents dislike me so much and want to put me to death and drive me away?" Huang Jiaqi couldn't resist this run-on, he couldn't help but stepped forward and kicked Huang Chang down, stepped on his chest and asked, "Did you say that? Did you say those bastard words just now? Did you say you didn't want you?" Damn?" Huang Chang was already extremely sad in his heart, and he had no intention of arguing. He just wanted to die quickly, and gritted his teeth and said, "I have my own mother! My mother is back! Let me go, I'm going to see my mother!" "You have a good idea! I'll kill you, and you don't even want to see her in your life!" Huang Jiaqi became furious when he mentioned Zhao Yifan, and he heard that Huang Chang's whole heart was for his mother, and he hated raising her for nothing. I don't know how to be grateful.He didn't talk any more at the moment, just kicked at the vital point one after another, repaying all the hatred for Yifan back then on this daughter who only had a mother but no father in her eyes. Huang Chang gritted his teeth and didn't say a word. He rolled all over the floor at first, then stopped moving, but still opened his eyes wide, looking at the room with hatred. The furnishings had never been so clear. The mahogany tables and chairs, Enamel smoke cups, Yixing teapots with big buttons and small details, inside-painted snuff bottles from old palaces, remnants of Zhang Zeduan’s "Riverside During the Qingming Festival" by Zhang Zeduan invited by famous teachers, scrolls and pheasant feathers in blue and white porcelain vases, A statue of an angel with wings stands on a silver plate, and the hands of a gold-painted and filigree Western clock point to nine o'clock in the morning.Nine o'clock, what an hour of infamy! she hates. This room is full to the point of being crowded, filled with things of gold, silver, beads and jade, but there is no family affection alone!She hates it! Feet in all kinds of embroidered shoes, black cloth shoes and cowhide shoes are moving back and forth in front of you. The room is full of people, but there is no human taste!She hates it!She hates it!She hates it! If fire could come out of her eyes, she would have burned the house and herself, but in the end she just closed her eyes feebly, unable to move any more. Cui's mother thought that the second master was the young lady's own father, and would always point to her daughter, but she thought that she was not helping her, and invited the next plague god to come, who could only beat the second grandma harder. She was angry and anxious, and let out a long howl Turned over.Huang Di was so frightened that he didn't even know how to cry.The servants didn't look good, and they had already let go of their hands and retreated far away, but Huang Erye was still kicking desperately.Cui's mother woke up again, seeing that Huang Chang could only breathe out, not breathe in. She didn't care about life and death, so she flew up and shouted, "Master! Master! Are you really going to kill Miss?" What did she say that she is your own daughter! If you continue to fight, Miss will really die!" Lin Ma also pulled Huang Di to kneel down quickly, and the servants next to him also knelt down on the ground.Huang Jiaqi kicked her a few more times, then gave up, panting and said: "Shut her up to Aunt Chu Hong's room on the first floor, and no one will let her out without me! I want to find out who If you dare to let her go, I'll take her skin off!" Then he kicked Cui's mother, and then left. It wasn't until the second master and the second mistress were far away that Lin's mother dared to come over and try to pull Cui's mother up.Cui's mother held down the place on her waist that hurt from being kicked by the second master with one hand, and pushed Huang Chang with the other: "Miss, how are you feeling now?" Huang Chang did not move, and there was no trace of blood on her face. , Stretch out your hand to try it on your face, even your breath is slightly faint. Cui's mother panicked, her legs gave way and fell to her knees, and she burst into tears: "My lady, you don't want to just go like this, do you?" Lin's mother rolled Huang Chang's eyelids and said, "It's okay, our young lady is attacking with qi and blood, just let it go." Cui's mother was always timid, she was already exhausted after going through these big winds and waves today, she heard that the young lady was fine, she felt relieved, and passed out again. In all the articles about Ruan Lingyu, the name "Huang Chang" will never be mentioned. But in Huang Chang's life, Ruan Lingyu strangely occupies a very important and delicate position. Because of the existence of Ruan Lingyu, Huang Sang was madly infatuated with movies for a time; but also because of Ruan Lingyu's disappearance, besides his own experience of the pain of life, Huang Sang had a deeper and more desolate sigh for the suffering of life. During the confinement period, what she thought about the most was not her mother Zhao Yifan who had just returned to China, but Ruan Lingyu, who died young when she was very popular.From the reports of various tabloids and her father's comments, she has already known in detail Ruan Lingyu's short but colorful life-the young man was tortured, and suddenly God piled up all the good things a woman could hope for. : Beauty, fame, wealth, and even love, are like cooking oil in a raging fire, flowers blooming, but then they are all taken away, in exchange for double bitterness, when she blooms to the most beautiful and most beautiful, it is also her way At the end of the day, you have to choose to avoid it by death-there is nothing more tragic than this in life. But it is precisely because of this tragic decision that the tragedy also has a kind of beauty, a kind of cold beauty. Huang Chang didn't know what kind of opportunity her fate had with Ruan Lingyu, she just couldn't help thinking about her over and over again in the boundless claustrophobic life, thinking about every role she played in the movie, with every frown, smile, and gesture.Ruan Lingyu is kind and gentle to her, like a silent sigh, gently walking into her life without knowing it.Her confinement seems to be a kind of mourning for Ruan Lingyu's death, and it is to let her feel the pain of the death of this actress without any external disturbance. The cell where she was confined was originally the room of the second aunt Chu Hong, but now it has become her creative studio.She dug out all the skills she learned from Chinese and Western schools, all the knowledge she got from books, and all the feelings she summed up from her own life experience, and wrote down one after another mourning poems, even one as long as 29 years. "Mourning Jade Biography" with ten thousand characters.This is not enough, she wrote a lot of scripts for Ruan Lingyu. Although it is impossible for her to play those roles again, Huang Chang knows that if she plays, she will definitely perform well. Those stories are almost for her. tailor-made. When he first lived in this dark, damp room with a musty smell, Huang Chang was extremely terrified.Because after Chu Hong's death, it has been rumored by the servants to be a haunted house.The room was on the first floor. It was originally dark, and trees were planted outside the window. They grew up year by year, covering the sunlight. What leaked through the gaps between the leaves was not light, but shadows. It's all a Giselle nightmare dance. Huang Erye originally ordered her to be locked in this room to punish his daughter.For a fifteen-year-old girl, there is no horror and shock that is more intense than being locked in a haunted house.During sleepless nights, when she looked around, she felt that there were silent murderous intentions lurking everywhere in the dark room, ready to devour her at any time.But the so-called sorrow is greater than death, when she thought of Ruan Lingyu, she suddenly took everything lightly. What is so terrible about death?It is not as good as "people's words are terrible". Naturally, it is not as good as "the father is ruthless", "the stepmother is ruthless", and "the family is separated" and "there is no freedom". So why fear? It's just that it's not reconciled to die at her age.It's not that he is greedy for life and the world, but that he is too tasteless. She didn't have the opportunity to perform a classic play like "New Women", didn't have time to appreciate the emotional experience like Chaoyun and Muyu, and she didn't have the qualifications to express the shocking emotion like "human words are awesome", how could she be willing to die?Even death is silent and colorless. She suddenly felt a little envious of Ruan Lingyu's death, because that dramatic death contained all the imagination and desire of a young girl for love tragedy and the beauty of tragedy. She thought of Aunt Chu Hong who lived in this house.The family members were wondering why Second Aunt Yu refused to take the medicine and would rather die, but now Huang Chang suddenly understood: it was because she wanted to see Dr. Lin, and if her illness recovered, Dr. Lin would not come again, so she He didn't want to recover, just in exchange for meeting him one more time, one more time.Later, when she got the news that he would not come again, it was too late for treatment, and even if she could get better, what would life mean to her if she never saw him again?It would be better to let her die quietly with the deepest true feelings and the most beautiful memories of Dr. Lin. These are all the thoughts of the second aunt in the last moments of her life.Huang Chang understands better than anyone else, not because she is precocious, but because her understanding of feelings in suffering is more sensitive, more meticulous, and more tragic than anyone else. This is also the revelation of Ruan Lingyu's miserable soul to her in the dark, right?