I am determined.I also told myself: This idea must not be shaken.If I am indecisive, crisis will be approaching. However, I don't hate my husband.Examining my mood objectively, it should be said that I still have some attachment to my husband.My husband is now a full-time lecturer.In the future, he will surely be promoted to associate professor of University A, and then take the top chair of professor.This is certain, and it must be known that he has won the favor of the head professor and has become the son-in-law of the only daughter, Chenglong, and is deeply trusted in the laboratory.What's more, the name of the psychologist Masao Iino is also very popular in the press.Especially in the professional field of "criminal psychology", which is directly related to social phenomena, he is more popular than my father, the chief professor.What's more, he also has a great amateur skill. (A husband has this talent, and even I, as a wife, have only recently learned of it).My husband had a student friend who worked as an editor for a magazine.Under his persuasion, her husband wrote a detective story, which was an unexpected success.I also like to read detective novels. I have read many such works, but I also think that my husband's novels are really good.Immediately after the publication of that novel, several magazines asked him to write it.My husband refused all of them because he was busy with his career, but his desire to write was still very strong, and he often bought and read translations of foreign detective novels.Therefore, it is not too long before the title of "psychologist who also writes detective novels" is added to the husband's name.

There is no doubt that in the eyes of the world, my husband is a Class A male.And of course I am a blessed wife.When I was a student, my girlfriends in the same class said, "Gezi borrowed his father's help to find a good marriage."Although I am brave and aggressive, I still have a little bit of self-knowledge. Marrying such a husband may be a blessing for me.But this gentleman should start from the beginning. September 14th is a Sunday.There was a postcard in the mail delivered by the postman.Our husband and wife have a habit of not reading any mail that is stated to be received by the other party, even if it is a postcard, without the other party's permission.But on this postcard, the word "Mrs." is written next to the husband's name, and there is a black frame around it.One look and you know it's a death notice.I thought: Who is dead?So, before sending it to my husband's study, I read it:

"Miss Nayuri" About a month ago, when her husband was away, Miss Suwa Yuri visited.At this point I remembered her bright and alert face, so I re-read the postcard.The words are too concise, I am afraid it can be regarded as the shortest death notice.And that business tone is simply a bureaucratic article.Perhaps the loving father of the beloved eldest daughter could only express his sorrow in this way, having lost the jewel in his palm by a sudden accident not mentioned in the notice. 1958. The husband's study is on the second floor.I took the postcard up the stairs.I was moved to see how my husband reacted to the death notice.I have a kind of uneasy expectation: Is the problem between my husband and Miss Yuli really smooth?

I walked into the study without knocking.The husband, who was wearing a gray cardigan, had a violent shoulder shock and turned his head hastily.He was burning a scrap of paper in an ashtray.I didn't see it very clearly, but looking over his shoulder, it was real.But I pretended not to know it. "Oh, Miss Suwa Yuri has passed away." "Oh?" My husband's reaction was completely different from what I expected.He behaved as usual.Usually he read reports about the death of foreign scholars, and he seemed more panicked than this time. "It is said that he died in an accident. What happened?"

"Oh? Show me!" The husband finally expressed interest.However, this behavior always makes people feel a little contrived. "I see. I was on a business trip on the 11th. I'll ask the students tomorrow. Maybe someone will know." After saying that, my husband seemed to stop caring about the matter and handed the postcard back to me.Then he stretched out his finger, intending to poke at the burnt paper in the ashtray. "Oh, what is this for? Your hands will get dirty!" I yelled deliberately, blocking my husband's fingers. "I'm going to dump it."

I took the ashtray from the desk and hid it behind my sleeve.I am not suspicious of my husband's action.A man's secrets are actually very limited. Especially my husband, I think it shouldn't be a big deal.If I find out that he is having an affair with another woman, it will inevitably endanger his future status.However, even if it is not a very important secret, I would like to find out for myself. "However, Suwa-san died so early, maybe it's her blessing." The husband didn't care about the ashtray, but mentioned Miss Yuri in a nostalgic tone, "She has that kind of disease, and she can't get married. Life."

However, I have no special interest in this matter, but I am eager to check the paper in the ashtray. "Maybe it is." I echoed softly, and left the study. Back in the dining room, I immediately checked the papers in the ashtray.According to the two centimeter square remaining piece, it can be deduced that the piece of paper was cut from a notebook, and a string of Arabic numerals written in pencil can be seen on the remaining piece: 15,000.I picked up the embers with chopsticks and tried to decipher all the literature, but unfortunately the paper shrank in the burning, making it impossible to read.My intentions failed.

Suwa Yuri-san came to visit her husband on August 10th.She claims to be a student of psychology. Judging by her appearance, she is indeed a serious student. She didn't wear lipstick, and her clothes were plain, with a white blouse on top and a tight black skirt on her bottom, which was inconspicuous.On that day, my husband was away from home to teach a summer lecture at the preparatory school, but I insisted on inviting Miss Yuri into the reception room despite her repeated resignation.This is the first time a girl visits our house, and I think it is very rare. However, I didn't get along very well with the lady guest.I soon felt that this fast-talking girl was difficult to deal with.Maybe she read my mind and got up after saying a few words.

I had to say something to stay. "Ah, no." "If there is no inconvenience, can you tell me why you came?" "Well?" Miss Yuri thought about it, and sat down on the chair again. "I don't know if I should tell my wife, but let me tell you. I came here because of the novel my teacher wrote not long ago." Miss Yuri went on to say that my husband's novel was plagiarized.The real author is none other than.It was Yuri-san herself. "Because the title was changed, I didn't find out until now. I was shocked when I read it today. Naturally, it is not plagiarized word for word. The psychological description and dialogue of the main characters have changed a lot. But the plot of the story is completely copied. . The overall structure is also almost identical."

Ms. Yuri's lips move gracefully and clearly when she speaks, just like the lips of a TV announcer, which makes her appear tactful.I was mesmerized by her changing lips.There is a small mole under her left eye, which creates a delicate impression on her slightly wide face. "But I don't intend to submit this matter to the newspaper to make it public. It's useless. One is a teacher and the other is a student. It will make me a laughing stock." Miss Yuri cut off the conversation here, and then looked me straight in the eye with a serious gaze. "Oh, what do you mean?"

"I'm worried about being misunderstood, but I still have to say it." Then Miss Yuri's tone suddenly changed, "I want to buy a book. But I don't have any money, and I want to borrow money from the teacher. That's why I came here. " "Ah!" I suddenly realized.Isn't this extortion?She pretended to be so sincere and honest!I stared intently into her eyes.Yuri-san didn't avoid my gaze, and met my gaze. I was at a loss, looking at her beautiful eyes, racking my brains to find something to say. "Well, can you be more careful?" I finally came up with this sentence. "I loved reading detective novels since I was a child, so I also wanted to try to write one myself, so I wrote it in a notebook. Later, I wrote it down on manuscript paper and copied about sixty pages. When there were two or three pages left, I wrote it down. Qing’s original manuscript is missing. I searched many places, but couldn’t find it. Originally, I planned to vote for a magazine to participate in the prize-winning essay selection, but once the deadline passed, I gave up on it. I didn’t expect to read it today. I read the novel published by the teacher, thought it over and over again, and had no choice but to think that it was rewritten according to my work. At first I said to myself, the teacher would never do such a thing! But then I thought, my original manuscript was lost in the school. It is also possible that the teacher picked it up. This is exactly in line with my thinking. I always feel that the novel is the result of a slight change in my work. And the initials of the teacher’s pen name are not Y. S? I use The words 'Y. S use paper' just printed on the manuscript paper, maybe this has played the role of temptation. Now I bring the notebook where I wrote the draft." Miss Yuri was talking about such a serious matter, but she still had a smile on her lips. It was really hard for me to understand, but it gave me courage.I intentionally interrupted her words, and resolutely asked: "You also know that the matter you are talking about is very important, but are you sure?" I am quite pleased with my own words.My consciousness sharpened. I thought: "This girl doesn't know the heights of the sky and the earth, she talks nonsense, and she wants to get some money anyway. At this time, there is no room for weakness!" "Okay then. I was going to talk to the teacher directly. I only said it because my wife asked me. I think it's better to tell the teacher directly. So I'm leaving. The money I want to borrow will wait until the next day." Let's talk about it again." Miss Yuli finished speaking, got up and left. It is easy to imagine that I told my husband about Miss Yuri's visit as soon as he got home. "Suwa Yuri? Ah, is that her? Did she say something weird?" At that time, I suddenly wanted to test my husband.I decided not to tell Miss Yuri why she came here, and wait to see what my husband has to say. "Yeah. Kind of weird." "It really is so, no wonder others say so." "What did others say? Said she was blackmailing?" "Oh, you love to speculate! People say she has a kind of delusional disease!" Then, my husband told me many things about Yuri-san that had been discussed in the laboratory. "But why didn't she drop out?" "Well, it's really weird. Her morbidity seems to be just a phenomenon of menstruation. She is completely normal. Not only is she normal, but she is also a student with a very sharp mind!" I think this kind of thing may really exist.As far as I am concerned, I always have a dull pain in my waist during menstruation. Among my girlfriends, several of them suffer from abnormal nervousness during this period. "It's hard being a woman!" I finally let out a sigh.I wanted to end the conversation, so I walked away from my husband.I don't think it's necessary to tell her husband what Yuri-san said.That was nothing more than Miss Yuli's delusion.Telling her husband as a matter of fact will inevitably make him unhappy.As for Miss Yuli, after two or three days, once her menstrual period is over, she will return to normal, and she will be ashamed of her nonsense. However, Miss Yuri's words still have a place in my heart.Several times, I even wondered if there would be a letter from Ms. Yuri in the mail.After my husband came home, if there was a gloomy expression or a shadow of fatigue in his expression, I would suspect that "that incident" was the cause.But I don't want to ask my husband about it.My husband's self-esteem is stronger than others. After hearing those words, his anger may be beyond my imagination. It's just that since then, whenever I feel something in my heart and think about Miss Yuri, I almost always have the concept of "women are sad" in my heart like a conditioned reflex. The day after receiving the notice of Ms. Suwa Yuri's death, her husband came home from school, entered the room and said, "That matter is clear!" Talking to me immediately after entering the house is not in the habit of my husband.I didn't understand the meaning of his words, and I looked at his modified hands inexplicably. "Oh, it's about Suwa-san! The so-called accident turned out to be a fall from the train." "What? From the train?" "It is said that on the way home, in the area between Akatsuka and Uchihara on the Joban Line, she fell from the step outside the door of the carriage. She was also unlucky, and she was just in time for the meeting, and she was caught. Pressed into a meat paste!" "Oh, horrible!" I've never seen people's murdered bodies.Naturally, it is impossible to imagine the scene after Miss Yuri's death.However, just hearing her husband say that she was "pressed into a meat paste", I felt disgusted and disgusting. "But, did anyone see her?" "Probably not. It was in the middle of the night! However, according to the student ID card next to the corpse, I know her identity, and her handbag was also kept on the train. I can roughly deduce what happened." The husband finished changing Clothes, as usual, went to the corridor, sat down on the canvas couch, and lit a "Peace Dove" cigarette.Then he took a deep breath and let it out. "She is a good girl! She has a flexible mind" "But didn't you say she was delusional?" "Oh, it's just the menstrual period! I'm usually smarter than the average student. About this point, the students even asked me questions today!" "Ah, wait!" I moved a cushion from the corner of the room, put it next to the canvas couch, and sat down side by side with my husband.Then I pulled a Pearl from my belt and lit it. "Okay, tell me!" Maybe my expression was too magical, and my husband smiled shyly. "It's not a big deal, it's just that they asked me to reason why Yuri died like this." The husband's nostrils twitched slightly.This is his expression when he is proud.I think that's what's so cute about him.It seemed he was happy for his students to think of him as a mystery writer. "Then what did you say?" "This is not a reasoning, but just sorting out a few ideas. First, we can imagine three situations: first. Homicide; second. Suicide; finally, accidental death." "Whether he committed suicide or not, we have no right to speak before investigating her social relations, living environment, etc., so we will not consider it first. Secondly, it can be said that she did not intend to commit suicide. She did not leave a suicide note, and carried The purse contained a few scholarly books, the sort of thing a suicidal person would never carry. "Let's talk about accidental death. Regarding this point, many situations can be imagined. Maybe it was on the pedal outside the door while going to the bathroom to look around, and the train shook and fell down. It may also be on the pedal outside the door. Watching the stars, she accidentally fell down. She has a strange disease." "But did she happen to have that thing?" "I don't know! It's just a possibility." The husband finished his cigarette.Then he got up and left the canvas couch. I mentally counted the number of days between the date of Yuri-san's last visit and the date of her death.Sure enough, it was about a month.If that happened to Yuri-san that time, then this time, I think the last point in my husband's reasoning is probably the truth.As usual, the phrase "women are unfortunate" flashed through my mind. The next day, while the husband was away, a criminal policeman came to visit.Compared with the criminal policemen seen in movies and TV shows, this gentleman has a dignified appearance and a well-defined face, giving people the impression of rationality and wisdom. He handed me a business card and wrote "Ibaraki Prefecture Police Headquarters Search Section 1 Inspection Minister Tatsuro Honma". I think it's more gentlemanly than flashing your police ID. "I'll go to college later, and before I go, I want to ask my wife about one thing" Why Minister Honma came here, I have no way of guessing, but I still invited him into the reception room to discuss.When he took off his shoes, I noticed that the socks he was wearing were spotless.Although he came on a business trip, he paid attention to the cleanliness of his clothes.I developed a crush on him. "Talk about business when we enter the door, I'm sorry." After saying this opening sentence, he began to ask, he took out a black leather notepad from his pocket, "Have you heard about your husband being blackmailed?" The moment I heard the word "blackmail", I naturally thought of Miss Yuli's incident, and the scene of Miss Yuri's unfortunate death was in Ibaraki Prefecture, and Kima Detective was obviously visiting for that incident.However, I don't want to touch Miss Yuri's affairs at all. I thought, "She's not blackmailing." "Gee, I didn't hear anything" The Honma detective rolled his eyes at me with a professional expression on his face.Subconsciously avoiding his sight, I said "I'm sorry" and lit a "Pearl" brand cigarette. "But you know Suwa Yuri, right?" "Ah, you mean my husband's student? How pitiful she is!" I answered in my mouth, but I thought in my heart, "Oh, here we come!" "She was blackmailed during her lifetime. Haven't you heard of it?" "Well, I've seen her once in all, but she doesn't look like that kind of person." "Really? But isn't your husband showing any abnormal behavior?" "No, not at all." "For example, trouble raising money, don't you?" "Not at all." My answer was very straightforward. Could it be that the criminal police use this method to detect cases?Maybe he underestimated me.No wife, except a foolish woman, would say that her husband was behaving suspiciously. He made a thoughtful expression. I said, "But Miss Suwa is dead, so why ask these questions?" "No, in fact, it may be homicide, so a full investigation must be conducted." I gasped, it was completely unexpected.I always thought that the most reasonable explanation for Ms. Yuri's death was the paranoid that my husband said. "Well, that means, something suspicious?" I extinguished my cigarette in the ashtray. "Among her relics is an pocket money cashier, and she often gets sums of money. According to the investigation, she did not do part-time work, nor did she have living allowances. In addition, there are some marks in the income column, such as M.I. and Y.S, which seemed to be initials. So we suspected that those incomes were extorted by her, so we first searched for everyone those initials represented." After the detective finished speaking, he closed the notepad that might not have yielded any results, and took a sip of tea for the first time.His fingers are long and thin, which I think are very suitable for playing the piano.It is a pity that these hands were born on the policeman. "But this kind of income may not be obtained by extortion, right? Especially she is so handsome." I am in the same three words as women.Still, it's natural to think that prostitution is more likely than extortion. "Of course we took that into consideration. But the post-mortem dismissed the idea of ​​her prostitution." I silently nodded my head a few times in agreement.But I can't agree with the extortion.Maybe even her cashier's account was built out of that paranoia? "Perhaps you know that Yuri-san often harbors certain delusions. So does that notebook." At this point, I suddenly became alert. The detective's eyes lit up immediately.I think you have to be careful. "Wait, what's with the paranoia?" "Don't you know? But I also heard it indirectly from my husband." Then, I told me about Miss Yuri's illness that my husband had told me.The criminal policeman took out his notepad again and made a detailed record. After listening to me?After the statement, he said: "Thank you very much. This matter should be investigated as soon as possible." After he said that, he got up and said goodbye. After seeing off the detectives, I felt exhausted, and I was surprised even by myself.I didn't even have the energy to clean up teacups and snacks, so I fell heavily on the sofa in the reception room, lit a "Pearl" brand cigarette, and just after taking a puff, I stubbed out the cigarette again. Oops!A membrane seemed to form in my mind.After the criminal policeman left, he left a bitter aftertaste. I'm so excited, I'm trying to hold myself back and try to clear my head: "Did Miss Yuri be killed? Who killed her?" However, I shook my head.There is no need to consider this matter, let the police investigate it.That's not what makes me depressed. "But, did Ms. Yuli commit any blackmail? The detective's tone was unshakable. He also said that the object of the blackmail was my husband. If the husband was indeed blackmailed by her, then is the statement about the plagiarism true or false? ?” I remembered that I never asked my husband about plagiarism.Just because my husband mentioned Ms. Yuri's paranoia, I thought that Ms. Yuri's words must be the product of paranoia. "Isn't that a delusion, but a fact?" Thinking of this, I was startled.I remembered a sentence from the Honma detective: "Wait a minute, what's with the paranoia?"But it's strange to think about it now.The police have conducted a detailed investigation of Ms. Yuli's situation. They even know such trivial things as the fact that she has not done part-time work and that her parents have not provided her with living allowances. How could they not know that she is suffering from paranoia?Could it be that it was a means to get out of my words? "Otherwise, maybe Ms. Yuri's paranoia is nothing to do with it?" If so, my husband told me that she had paranoia in order to deceive me.Moreover, if Miss Yuri doesn't have this strange disease, isn't it true that she said that my husband plagiarized her work? I lit the cigarette again.Then, I plan to think over and over again and move forward slowly. "But how is this possible? Plagiarism of other people's works will naturally be exposed." The husband took such a big risk to gain fame and fortune outside of his profession.is not necessary.Why should he do this?His life is fully guaranteed financially, and his future status is generally expected.Is it just a desire for fame, seeking a novelist's name? The husband is really vain.After the novel was published, he compiled all the criticisms on it, no matter how short the article was, as long as he saw it, he compiled it in the scrapbook, and he even cut out the advertisement in the newspaper of that issue of the magazine.Isn't this perverted vanity?He was tempted to risk the publicity of his plagiarism in order to boast of his talents outside the professional sphere. "Then, what attitude will the husband take towards Yuri's appearance?" It seems obvious to me that theft of other people's work is regarded as a crime among scholars.If exposed, the husband would lose his life as a scholar. "So, the husband accepted Yuri's blackmail." For me, this is very unpleasant.I absolutely do not want to accept this conclusion. "Plagiarism is too much" I don't want to believe it.After all, Miss Yuri's delusion, right?Or for other purposes.She told a big lie. "It must be!" I stood up from the sofa.Never mind!Things will become clear when the husband comes home. However, after my husband returned home, he still couldn't solve my doubts.I showed him the detective's business card and said: "This gentleman came here today." The husband said: "Oh, that's the criminal policeman! He's also coming to the research room! He said a few nonsensical words, and then went back." He seemed indifferent to this, and was about to go into the study room after speaking.Seeing that I was silent, he looked up at him sullenly, and said, "I have eaten. I have a manuscript to be rushed out. Maybe I have to stay up all night." This is an announcement to me: his time very tight.If there is no particularly important matter, don't go into the study to find him. I grew up in a family of scholars, and after I got married, I naturally accepted this attitude from my husband.Whenever the time comes, I go to bed early.It would be utterly foolish to accompany my husband to work late into the night.Lack of sleep is the worst way to maintain your appearance. I made sandwiches for my husband's late-night snack and poured coffee into a thermos.Send it to the study.I opened the door and said hello: "Supper is here!" "Ah, thank you." The husband replied without looking back. "It's here. I'm going to sleep now." I said as I tiptoed behind my husband and poked my neck out to peek over the desk.There was manuscript paper spread out on the table, but nothing was written on it.The pen is also on the table, and the cap has not been removed. "What kind of urgent draft is this!" I was a little angry and quietly withdrew. After going to bed, I intend to think carefully.But before I knew it, I fell asleep.When I woke up, the clock next to my pillow pointed to half past one.The husband's bed is still vacant. "What the hell is he doing?" I wondered, looking at the dim ceiling illuminated by the small light bulb. Before I went to bed, my husband did not write a manuscript, nor did he read the materials.For scholars, sitting and thinking may also be a kind of work.However, the problem my husband was thinking at the time seemed to have nothing to do with work.I always feel that way. "And the scraps of paper that were burnt in the ashtray two days ago! My husband has been really weird lately." My eyesight gradually became sharper.The criminal policeman appeared in my consciousness, and then, I had a doubt in my heart, did my husband walk into the study to avoid me?Maybe he didn't want to talk to me about the detective's visit. I turned off the small bulb on the desk lamp.In the dark, the train of thought seems clearer, and "first," I thought, "suppose all the doubts hitherto as facts." Perhaps it is best to do this type of thinking in the dark.I made an assumption so frankly that I was astonished even to myself. I assume that the husband picked up Ms. Yuri's manuscript somewhere in the school (they are in the same laboratory. The scope of activities is not far apart, so this is very likely.). The husband initially planned to return it.But at that time, the editor of the magazine was persuading him to write a detective novel, and he was suffering from lack of ideas, so he had a wrong idea and wanted to use this manuscript.He thought that as long as the detailed description was changed, no one would know about the plagiarism.Maybe he thought about admitting to the author afterwards, but the opponent was a powerful woman.According to the criminal police, Ms. Yuli has also blackmailed others.It's like sending meat to the chopping block.When my husband heard that Miss Yuri came to visit while he was away, he didn't want me to know the secret, so he made up the theory of "paranoia" on an idea.Later, the husband undoubtedly succumbed to Miss Yuri's extortion and "lend" her "pocket money". I remembered the scrap of paper my husband had burned in the ashtray.Maybe that number has something to do with the amount he paid Miss Yuri?Maybe that's overkill, but there's some truth to this kind of thinking. "How much money did my husband give her?" When I got married, my father once said to me: "The life of a scholar is books, and he cannot be short of money to buy books." Our living expenses have always been subsidized by my natal family, and my husband's Almost all of his salary is left by himself to purchase books.I'm afraid he just handed over the book materials fee to Miss Yuli to deal with her blackmail. "Oh, that's all." I thought.That Miss Yuri is dead.The issue of blackmail is also wiped out.But why is the husband still thinking hard? My heart suddenly trembled.Maybe this is how people feel when they collide with a car. The detective Honma said that Miss Yuli's death was suspected by the police as homicide.He also showed his tone: Anyone who is blackmailed by profit is suspected of murder.It appears that the husband is also among the suspects. I was so excited that I could hear the beating of my heart.But I must calm down.I suppressed my agitation and planned to make a hypothesis first as before. What was the husband doing on September 11, the day Miss Yuri died?I tried to search for that vague memory.what!I remembered what my husband said, "I'm on a business trip!" My husband got on the train from Ueno on the night of September 10th the day before, and went on a business trip to a university in Sendai. I don't know which train Ms. Yuri took, but Her husband is likely to drive with her. Maybe he met Miss Yuri by chance on the train (or her husband knew his train number and took that one himself), and when the other passengers were asleep, he called Miss Yuri to the door outside the door. Thinking of this, my thoughts were in a mess for a while.Ms. Yuri's face, the business card of the Honma detective, and others, all flickering on the screen of my consciousness. I turned on the lamp next to my pillow.I can no longer bear the fear of wandering in the dark.I got up, went to the living room, and lit a cigarette.I swallowed the clouds leisurely, and my mood gradually returned to peace.In my opinion, having the facts is the prerequisite. Then a plan popped up in my mind.There is a locked drawer in the husband's desk.My husband usually puts the key to the drawer lock with him in his leather bag, and after he goes home and changes his clothes, he also takes that leather bag with him when he enters the study. "Just try to steal that key tomorrow morning." I quickly figured out how to steal the key again.The scholar has a pure state of mind, and it is not easy to deal with him! I finally calmed down.Just as I was going to bed, my husband came downstairs. "Haven't gone to bed yet? Hehe. Work is progressing unexpectedly well." As my husband said, he grabbed the leftover sandwich and stuffed it into my mouth.I put on a smile and accepted his never-before-seen "kindness". I thought, "We can't make him suspicious until the matter is found out." The next morning, I got up an hour earlier than usual and went to a nearby grocery store to buy matsutake mushrooms. In order to soak the pine mushrooms in water long enough, I have to buy them back in advance. My husband likes to eat fragrant and delicious meals such as matsutake mushroom rice and bamboo shoot rice.He usually eats lunch outside and does not bring boxed lunch from home. Only when I make this kind of fragrant rice, I put it in a lunch box and take it away. However, this time I made matsutake rice, not to please my husband, but to steal the key with a trick. When my husband came downstairs from the study with his purse under his arm and was about to go to work, I stopped him: "Give me the purse." My husband looked at me in surprise. "Look at you! Pack your lunch box." I said it quite naturally. "Ah, is that so?" The husband was overjoyed, and handed over the purse.Scholars are simple after all. I turned around to block my husband's view, stuffed the lunch box into my purse, and took out the key chain.My husband was reading the newspaper and probably didn't pay attention to my movements. After seeing off my husband, I immediately went into the study.I plan to put it aside for the time being for cleaning and collecting.There are two keys on the key chain, and I put one of them in the lock of the drawer.The drawers were not locked. "It seems that he also forgets to lock it sometimes. Actually, there is no need to cook matsutake mushrooms." There are very few things in the drawer.A notebook, a book, and a train timetable.Only these three. I check the notebook first.The notebook was written in a foreign language, much like French.If it is English, I can still read it, but I can't understand this kind of text.I close my notebook.Book, this book is very thick, about three centimeters in length, and the cover is wrapped in brown kraft paper.At the beginning of the book, there was a photo of a person hanging himself.I thought: what a strange book! "Uncover the cover paper, only to see the words 'Forbidden to spread outside' printed on the cover.The title of the book is "Research Materials on Masquerading Crime Volume II Anatomy and Cases of Masquerading Crime"; the author is the Scientific Reconnaissance Research Institute of the Police Department." Obviously, this book is the internal research data of the police. Maybe the husband borrowed it from the Metropolitan Police Department under the name of a criminal psychologist.However, he probably put the book solemnly in a locked drawer for more than that.I looked more closely and saw a bookmark tucked between the pages. It was six hundred and twenty-six pages, and on it was a subheading in boldface: "Third, Homicide Case with Pretended Wrongful Death."The article under the title lists the existing examples of disguised crimes, such as the case of assault and murder under the pretense of negligent falling death, the case of beating the biological mother under the pretense of falling and colliding death, and the murder of his wife under the pretense of negligent falling and drowning.There are many sidelines in the text, and there are French notes in the blank space, which are written by my husband. The third thing is the train timetable printed by the Train Section of the Operation Bureau of the National Railway Company headquarters, which contains the name of the captain of each train, and the operation of the train is marked with a slash. It is the Joban Line train timetable, revised on October 1, 1957. Added on June 1, 1958.My husband likes to travel, and he has a student friend who works at the National Railway Headquarters, so he got this train timetable.I also learned how to check the timetable. The station names are listed on the left side of this timetable, with Ueno at the bottom and Sendai at the top. The distance between stations is proportional to the actual distance.The lower side of the table marks the time zone from zero o'clock to twenty-four o'clock, and makes parallel lines corresponding to it.The operation of the train is indicated by a slash.For example, if you want to check the time when a certain train arrives at Mito, first find the intersection of the running slash of this train and the horizontal line of Mito Station.Then compare this intersection point with the vertical line representing the time, and you can understand.As long as you check it once, you will find it very convenient, and it is much simpler than the timetable of the transportation company. I think the investigation starts with this timetable.我在椅子上坐下，把时刻表展开。 时刻表上有许多红线。表示列车运行的斜线是用红油墨印刷的。从斜线可以看出：上野至土浦区间可乘211次普客。土浦至水户区间可乘209次快车，水户至仙台区间也可乘上面的211次。 从上野到仙台，若按表上的红线行走，便是在上野乘上二十二时十五分发车的普客，于二十三时四十九分到达土浦。在土浦换乘大约十五分钟后进站的“迎宾”号快车，于零时五十三分到达水户。在水户站月台上稍事等侯，先前那一趟普客，一度在土浦与水户之间另一条线路上改为快车，这时会绕行过来，于是又换乘这趟车前往仙台。 我想起来了：丈夫往仙台出差时乘坐的列车，是二十二时十五分发自上野的211次。丈夫还说，他想在旅途上作些调查研究，所以想把乘坐火车的时间尽量延长，所以当天他避免乘坐快车。然而从表上看来，丈夫在土浦特意换乘了快车。（我认为，设想红线标明了丈夫抵达仙台的途径，是十分自然的。） 丈夫在土浦至水户区间乘上快车的理由，恐怕是由利小姐也在这趟快车上面吧。这样一想，我便进一步查看表上的斜线，在由利小姐遇难的内原至赤塚区间，发自水户上行友部的366次货车与由利小姐乘坐的快车两条斜线相交，就是说两趟车在此交会交会时间为零时四十分左右。在夜行快车上，这个时间里乘客几乎都已入睡。丈夫很可能是用某种手段把由利小姐诱到了车门外面的踏板上，看准时机把她推下了火车。由利小姐跌落后，立刻被交会而过的上行货车压成了肉泥。其后，丈夫在水户再次改乘出发时乘坐的211次列车。这无疑是为了制造不在现场的假像。利用列车制造不在现场的假像，只是迈出了第一步。不过，由于乘坐快车的时间不足一个小时，所以一旦犯罪成为事实，要提出证据戳穿假像，是十分困难的。 我想吸烟了，可是手边没有烟。恰好烟灰缸里有一支丈夫吸剩的香烟，留下了颇长一截，于是我把它点燃了，我格外冷静，连自己也觉得不可思议。既然发现了列车时刻表的秘密，便可认为丈夫的罪行确定无疑了，可我为什么却很沉着呢？我体味到一种喜悦。在阅读追索凶手的侦探小说时，半途中悟出了凶手的身份和计谋的读者常常感到这样的乐趣。我竟然毫无现实感。 我想再次查看那本笔记。我发现，九月九日所记的是最后一篇。日期是用阿拉伯数字写的“9.9”，我一看就明白了。这就是说，丈夫在出发旅行的前一天写下最后一篇日记。我对这篇看不懂的日记注视良久，发觉诹访由利小姐的姓名起头字母Y。S多次出现。如果我能看懂，事情就昭然若揭了！突然；我发现最后十行虽然同是外文，但其拼法却是我所熟悉的。这是一句英文： “Farewell。My Hateful！” 这时，楼下响起了电话铃。我把香烟搁在烟灰缸上，急忙下楼。电话是丈夫打来的。 “喂喂，没什么大事，只是问问你在书房里看见我的钥匙没有。” 我立刻惶乱起来。 “看见了，在呀！你忘了带吗？要不要给你送去？” “不不，只要在就行。我还以为是掉了呢。”丈夫说完正事，便挂断了电话。我又上楼进了书房。 刚走到书桌边，我倒抽一口冷气。那份列车时列表烧焦了，穿了一个窟窿。刚才我起身去接电话，离坐时把时刻表触动了位置，使它覆盖在烟灰缸上，烟头的残火把它烧穿了。 我患失眠症的征候，就是在那一夜出现的。在这以前，我一直睡得十分安稳。丈夫甚至嘲笑我：“这么能睡，难怪长得肥胖。”夜夜睡梦酣畅的我，从那一夜起便为失眠所苦了。 我觉得眼皮发粘，便钻进被子。可是刚刚躺下，两眼突然变得格外清明。只是头脑并不十分冷静，思维杂乱无绪。有时侯老是想着同一件事，而又得不出任何结果。当时钟打点，才忽然清醒过来。在这种状态下，没有能在淩晨三点以前入睡。 是什么把我的意识纠缠不放，使我不得入眠呢？首先就是“丈夫可能犯了杀人罪”这个念头。我在刑警来访的那天夜里所起的疑念，到现在已成了毫不含糊的确信。丈夫把那份列车时刻表和员警厅发行的内部资料等等锁在抽屉里，这意味着它们是丈夫的秘密。丈夫之所以直到现在还不把它们销毁，也许是因为他胸有成竹，认为警方若没有相当可靠的旁证，便不会下令搜查一位社会地位很高的犯罪心理学家的住宅。 还有那本日记中在最后一篇末尾所写的美文：“Farewell，My Hateful”， 最有力地揭露了丈夫的罪行。 “Farewell，My Hateful！”我在丈夫的日记本里看到这句话时，起初还未尽解其意。此外，在用法语写作的日记中，为什么仅此一句用英文写就，我觉得不可思议。可是，当我几度念诵这句英文之后，突然觉得这句话似曾在哪里听过。我以各种方式将它译为日语。在误试几遍之后，我想起了“别了”这个词，脑子忽然开窍了。 《别了，可爱的人！》是雷蒙。昌德勒代表作的题名，我把它流利地念了出来。我很快查到，其原名是《Farewell，My Lovely》。我明白了：丈夫是为了模仿它并要与之对仗，才特意用英语书写下来。丈夫那句话的意思，漂亮的译法也许是“别了，可恶的人”吧。 在丈夫看来，诹访由利小姐是个死皮赖脸的敲诈者。给他的未来蒙上了阴影，自然非常可恶。他这句话，也许就是与由利小姐永别的意思吧。正因为如此，他才在犯罪的一天的日记里写下了这句话。在日记本里看到这句话以后，我便确信丈夫必是罪犯无疑了。 使我不能入眠的第二个念头，便是那份列车时刻表被烟头烧穿一事。 那一天，当我准备把我从抽屉里拿出来的三样东西放回原处时，我遇到了一个难题。打开抽屉时，我首先就记住了三样东西所放的位置，其顺序是：列车时刻表放在最上层，下面依次是犯罪研究资料和笔记本。所以，打开抽屉后，最先看到的便是时刻表。这样一来，收拾东西时自然应按原来的次序放置，否则丈夫一眼就能看出我趁他不在家时搜查过这些东西。 而若把时刻表放在最上层，丈夫很容易看出它烧了窟窿。这会引起他的疑心。 我不知怎样才能解决这个矛盾。左思右想，找不出一条妙计。末了，我决定听天由命。便按照原来的顺序，把时刻表放在最上层，关上抽屉了事。接着我思考片刻，觉得还是不上锁为好，便离开了书桌。 所以，丈夫后来拉开抽屉时，想必已经发现了我对他的东西作了验查。那一天，丈夫回家进了书房以后，我紧张不安，提心吊胆，心想：“就会按铃叫我了。快了！快了！” 可是丈夫的态度一如既往。唉，我的预想落空了。没有反常的表现。我原来担心他会对我厉声喝斥，没想到他毫无责怪之言。代之而起的是，他和我之间仿佛张开了一张隔膜。其第一个征兆，体现于对话中的遣词造句。我们一反平常，摒弃了世间一般夫妻之间那种自然的对话，我居然恢复新婚之初相敬如宾的客套。 “对，你说得很对。” “请给我拿来好吗？” 我们说话，就是如此处处恭谨。新婚燕尔时，也许是未曾摆脱教授千金的意识的缘故，说话就是这般文雅。 然而这一次分明是有意疏远，想起来觉得可怕。 何况吃饭的时侯，丈夫有时似乎对我凝目而视，好象在窥探我的内心。 当我感到了丈夫的视线，刚把目光时他移去。他便装得若无其事，把筷子伸向菜碟 夜里躺在床上，这些事情一一从我意识中流过，隐而复现。 我度过了四个不眠之夜。 接着迎来了第五个早晨。 丈夫临出门时对我说：“啊，差点儿忘了。今晚要上土羽日机场送一位高中时代的朋友去法国，要到半夜后才能回家，你先休息吧。” 我想：“叫我先睡，我也睡不着！” 也许这想法流露于表情了，丈夫又补充道： “你近来好象睡不着吧？” 丈夫说着，从上衣口袋里掏出一个手掌可以握住的小纸包，把它递给我。“我忘了。我对神经科的一位朋友说了你的症状，他就给了我这包药。好象是安神剂吧，听说很有效。睡前吃下去就行了。” 丈夫说罢，上班去了。 此后几个小时内，我把那纸包忘得一干二净。可是午饭后，忽然想到丈夫的事情，记起他临走时给了我一包药。 于是，我从裙子前面的口袋里把它掏出来，打开一看，原来是白色的粉剂。我对它注视良久，心想：“真有效么？” 我的失眠也许确是一种神经衰弱。不过，其原因却并非寻常的操心忧虑，单靠这点药是别想治癒的。我想尝尝味道，便用濡湿的无名指戳了戳药粉，指头上沾了一层白粉。 我把它送进嘴里，用舌头舔一舔，味道很淡，似乎有点儿甘甜。“再试点儿吧。”我又把指头向药粉戳去。突然，我大惊失色。我立刻跑进厨房，含水漱口，洗却舌尖的甜味。 “危险！真危险！” 也许这是毒药。不，肯定是毒药！ “我险些儿被害死了。看来，由于那列车时刻表上的烧痕，丈夫知道我看穿了他的隐私，便慎重谋划，延至今天早晨方才实行。”我认为这无可置疑。 此后片刻之间，我非常兴奋。但我反复漱口，直到口里毫无异味，才放下心来。我回到餐室里，点燃香烟。吸了第一口，觉得美不胜收。 我想：丈夫的计画现在暴露无遗了。 丈夫根据我夜晚失眠，根据我那也许是故意显露的举止表情，完全透视了我的心理活动。我未必不会找我父亲商谈，同时有可能在刑警的诱导讯问下吐露真情，这使丈夫非常害怕，他决定杀我灭口。 今晚丈夫要到夜半过后才会回家。如果我听信了他的嘱咐，睡前服药，到那时我已经死于卧床了。在警方推算出来的死亡时间里，丈夫确实不在现场，很容易摆脱干系。 他会作证说：“妻子最近有神经病的症状，我很担心，也曾找朋友商量”根据这些话，警方很可能推断我是自杀身亡。 我又想道：“好险哪！”那个纸包仍然摊开在那里，也许是心理作用的缘故吧，我觉得它光泽黯淡。关于带有这种光泽的毒药，我似曾在小说之类的读物中见识过。 我拿起纸包，小心翼翼不让药粉洒落，把它送到厨房里，把自来水龙头拧开到最大限度，把药粉冲走。如果把这药收藏在某个地方，日后出于某种疏忽，万一误服下去，便是悔之莫及了。 冲走药粉之后，我又用沾了洗涤剂的刷帚仔细清洗水槽，然后把刷帚和包药纸一起扔进了垃圾箱。 我给丈夫留下一张简单的便条，随后离家出门。无论如何，我要回一趟娘家，与丈夫分居几日。 自赤羽到大森，我选乘计程车。我想比较冷静地作一番思考，不愿混杂在人群之中。幸好汽车上客席的软垫性能优良，车子的震动对头部毫无影响。我悠然思索今后的对策。 我想出了好几个办法。 第一，以谋杀由利小姐和对我谋杀未遂的罪名控告丈夫。 第二，一如既往，对一切佯装不知，继续婚姻生活。当然，应随时小心提防，以免被害。 第三，将我的推理告诉丈夫，然后继续婚姻生活，为防被害，对丈夫预先提出以下警告：我已作好安排，一旦我惨遭不测，便会有人寄信给员警揭发一切罪行。 第四，离婚。 我又思考这四条对策的可能性及其利弊得失。 第一条也许是最为安全的办法。但其手段最不可取。对于告发丈夫的妻子，人们决不会怀有好感，在英国和美国的某个州里，妻子不能作出不利于丈大的证言，是确有其事的。即使在日本，窝藏犯法的直系亲属，法律并不问罪，而有给直系亲属栽罪之虞的证言，法庭也有权否决。 这体现了社会对于夫妻关系理想状态所持看法的最大公约数，如果我无视这种情况，人们便会对我暗中指责。 何况我的告发也许根本难不倒丈夫。诹访小姐的案子纯系推测，而对我谋杀未遂如今已无任何证据。（我做了一桩蠢事，竟把那纸包扔弃了。）我难免成为笑料。 第二个办法危机四伏。不论找多么小心提防，守方较之攻方，总是大为不利。特别是丈夫聪明过人，他可以试用种种办法，对我心理上的盲点发动攻击。 第三个办法，坦率地说，起初最令我动心。也许这是我对丈夫还有些依依不舍的缘敌，但是冷静一想，又怀疑他是不是值得我与之白头偕老的男人。他确实聪慧善思，而且将来可望声名大振。可是他竟想剥夺我的生命，哪怕只此一次，与这样的人共处一室，毕竟不合人之常情。 如此看来，可行的方案，岂非只有这第四项了么？离婚以后，丈夫便成了陌路人，而那件事也就会从记忆中消失。既然两人分居，丈夫也就无法加害于我了吧。我和他分道扬镳，却又不让他知道这是他的罪行使然，他是不会轻易杀害我的。 末了，我决定离婚。接着，我盯嘱自己：这是绝对不可更改的决定。如果犹疑不决，危机便会逼近。 然而，要让父母同意这个决定，却是非常棘手的事情。如果我照实直说，父母恐难相信。看来，只好一口咬定“想离婚”，苦争不让。父母若问及理由，死活只说一句话：“什么也别问，求求你们！”这样还不行。就说不能离婚，宁求一死。 于是，我努力给父母造成这样的印象。他们听了我的话，双双愕然。好几回面面相觑。 然而父亲是一位心理学家，我因此而摆脱了困境。父亲似乎察觉到，既然我把话说绝了其，中必然大有缘故。他不象母亲那样热心地劝我回心转意。 “可你是否跟饭野君达成了谅解呢？”父亲在反复追问了大约半个小时以后，提出了这个问题。 “没有。可他不会反对。” “哦？这是夫妻之间的问题，够微妙的可我没脸见饭野君了！叫我怎么说呢？'以前是我希望女儿跟你结婚。可是婚后一年半载，女儿不愿跟你过了。请你跟她分手吧！'这么说恐怕不行吧？” 这话倒也实在。在第三者看来，也许觉得不合情理。在研究室里，恐怕也会议论木村教授的女儿过于任性。不过，也只好听之任之了。 “他那方面，爸爸给想想办法嘛！给他升教授，或者派他出国留学。”我又回到了少女时代，娇声地央求父亲。 “别说傻话！怎么能这样公私不分！何况饭野君本来就具备留学的资格，当教授也是势所必然。” “那就由我给他赡养费！” “赡养费是说不出口。不过，赤羽的那所房子就让饭野君住下去吧！明年四月他就升任副教授了。给他更多的经济援助，反而失礼。” 父亲此言既出，无异于大事已定。我上楼走进我出嫁前所住的六席房间，连日来第一次酣然睡去。 第二天，我托父亲传话，把丈夫请到了家里。我和他在会客室相见。父亲要求在场，但我断然拒绝。我想，我们之间也许会说出我不愿父亲听说的事情。 我见了丈夫，便把上午从区公所领来的离婚申请表递了过去，并说： “请在上面签名吧。” 丈夫朝离婚申请表投去一瞥，并未显出吃惊的表情。 “你叫我做的事情，我都会照办。”丈夫的口气特别爽快，“你已经作了充分考虑吧。” “对。”我微微垂首。 “不过，离婚对于夫妻来说，是解决问题的最后一着。这影响非同小可呀！你能不能说说理由呢？也许有什么误会吧。” 我没料到，事到如今，丈夫还会说出这番话。 “哦？这话该由我来问吧？”我有意说得郑重其事。 这一下丈夫沉默了。他那对尾角又尖又长的眼睛凝视着我，久久没有眨眼。我竭力抗拒他的视线。不错，丈夫明白我那反问的意义。他想进一步探索我对事情了解到了何种深度。 过了一会，丈夫那一直紧闭的嘴唇牵动了几下。接着，他把手伸进内衣袋。我一时害怕起来：“他会拿出什么凶器吧？” 然而，他的右手只是握着一支钢笔。He said: “并非出自本心，但我还是同意吧。不过，签字以前我想声明一句：一旦离婚，两人就不再往来，彼此不再关心对方。这是我的愿望。” “行，我同意！” 我认为丈夫这才说出了真意，但我仍然应允。I want a divorce. 正是为了安心度日，既然愿意离婚，哪还有心思挂念那种事情！I said again: “请放心吧。就从今天开始，我会把你整个儿忘却。” “彻底忘却？”丈夫叮问一句。 “对，彻底忘却！”我望着丈夫的眼睛，回答得斩钉截铁。 丈夫嘴边浮着微笑。但他的眼睛里却无笑意。 两人签名完毕时，父亲进来了。 “饭野君，我女儿任性，实在对不起！不过，尽管你们离婚了。对我却不必拘束，今后还望你”父亲的话没有说完，他垂下了秃头。 我想：“上了这把年纪，却向弟子低头谢罪，父亲真可怜！” 丈夫也说：“不，是我不好！”他嘴边那讥诮的微笑，不知何时已经消失。 此后约摸半个月时间，我过得悠闲自在。早晨慵卧不起，想出门时尽可外出，真是为所欲为。出乎自己的意料，这段时间里竟很少想起已经分手的丈夫。只是在十月一日国铁宣布对列车时刻表作了广泛调整时，我脑子里才闪过了一个念头： “啊，这一来丈夫伪装不在现场的假像就更难识破了！” 总而言之，我已经摆脱了当初的失眠和苦恼，轻松自在地打发日子。 有一天，我上银座购买物品。归途中觉得口渴，走进一家茶馆。我坐在桌边的席位上吸饮咖啡，观望外面来往不息的人流。我坐的窗口，正对着公共汽车停留站。 一辆公共汽车开过来，停下了，吞吐了乘客，正要起步而去。这时刻，一个身着深蓝西服的女郎，约摸二十出头，疾步跑来，追随移动的车门，手捶口喊。但汽车没有停下，加速驶离了车站。那女郎似乎焦急地叫了一声，把右手挥舞了几下，但也只好死心了，等待下一辆汽车，她迅速地看了看手表。我想道：“是去赶约会吧？”这时女郎扭头朝我这边望来。 ?时间，我的呼吸凝止了。我下意识地侧转身子，藏住自己的面孔，但对方似乎并没有认出我。我的心搏动得又快又猛，连我自己也感到了心室里的脉冲。 “不会存这种荒唐事情！”我竭力劝慰自己。我把玻璃怀中的水一气喝干。接着，我又朝那女郎望去。我没有看错。那女郎决不是别人。 诹访由利小姐就在我的眼前。细看之下，她脚上的那双无带鞋，正是她上次到赤羽来访时所穿的那一双。她头带贝蕾帽，外表给我的印象有所变化，但她左眼下的那颗黑痣，已经深深地刻在我的记忆里。 “肯定是她！这究竟是怎么回事呢？” 我把残剩的咖啡一饮而尽，又把香烟在烟灰缸里揿灭，我起身离席，却不知下一步该怎么做。 我付了帐款，移步走出店门，脚步立刻变得沉缓。我没有胆量突然与由利小姐正眼相视。必须做得慎重一些。我不知她身后隐藏着什么秘密。 我又闪身走回店堂，然后进了卫生间。在里面挨过了两三分钟。又躲躲闪闪地走到店外。由利小姐无影无踪了。 “逃走了？”我未免遗憾，但心中好象一块石头落了地，倒也乐得如此。 那一日，我整天想着这件事。后来，我构想了一套推理。 诹访由利小姐没有死，这一点毫无疑义。因此被害者是另一个女人。我记起了丈夫说过的话： “正赶上会车的时候，结果被压成了肉泥。根据学生证和手提包，警方确认了她的身份。” 我嗅到了犯罪的气味。也许是由利小姐眼见自己敲诈勒索的罪行将要败露，便将第三者杀害，伪装自己的死亡，以逃避警方追究。也可能是由利小姐发现我丈夫企图杀害她，便把自己的学生证交给另一女子，利用列车门外的黑暗，使丈夫错杀了第三者。（显然，这第三者被杀对于由利小姐是很有必要的。）说不定由利小姐此后掌握着更有力的把柄，在继续敲诈我的丈夫。 我打算查明此事。摆脱了婚姻的束缚，我的行动完全自由了。这件事不可等闲放过。 翌日，我到了B报报馆。这里有一位元秋山记者，以前采访了奇案，常来找我丈夫征询意见。他在社会部供职，我找他是为了借阅地方版的合订本。秋山先生把我让进接待室，很快为我拿来了茨城版的合订本。 我要调查的案件，发生于十日夜晚到十一日之间，我想关于案子的报导应该登在十一日的早报上。可是找遍每一行标题，总不见关于那