Chapter 21 Section VI

"Hello? It's me. Uh, sorry, who is it... Huh? Qing, Qingwei?" "Hi!" The steady and powerful voice was indeed Qingwei's. "Xiao Hai, hello." "You!" I was startled, and gripped the receiver tightly: "Why do you have my phone number..." "I went to ask Qinmei." "Ah," By the way, I have called Qinmei.what to do?I stared blankly at the calendar on the front wall, not knowing what to do.Now Qingwei knows my true face (although it is a bit exaggerated to say so), maybe she will find out that I am actually just an inconspicuous and vulgar high school girl.I don't want to, I don't want to be seen in reality, that can't bear the exposure.

"Uh, excuse me—" Let's calm down first, I put my hand on the phone table, and spent two seconds thinking about countermeasures, but unfortunately it didn't work. "What's wrong? What's the matter..." "Do you know that Arikawa is dead?" Qingwei's voice was quite serious. "Ah, yes... I saw it on TV." "I heard he was killed." "Ok, I know." "Then do you know that he was killed after leaving the venue?" Qingwei's voice sounded painful: "If I had been with him at that time, this kind of thing wouldn't have happened..."

"Don't say that, it's not like this—" I interrupted Qingwei: "Uh, Qingwei, you are not wrong, there is nothing you can do about it, so, Qingwei, you didn't—" "I know." Qing Wei answered briefly. "I just want to play the role of a tragic heroine. You see, if you blame yourself for such a powerless thing and treat it as your own fault, it will make you feel better, right?" "Well." I can understand her mood very well. "Sorry, I called you suddenly, isn't it annoying?" "Ah, no, how come..." "Because Xiao Hai, you have always wanted to hide your identity."

"There is no such thing." It was really nonsense. "No." "Well, don't care, don't care, even I don't want to reveal my true colors." Qing Wei replied, with laughter at the end of the sentence. "Qingwei, you too?" I was a little surprised. So, is that lively and cheerful Baoxian Qingwei a fictional existence? I can't imagine, and I have always believed unconditionally, that she lives in the same way in her daily life. "That's right, I'm like that too." Qing Wei said softly, "Although I don't live only in role-playing, I'm really ordinary in normal times, so ordinary that there's no point in living. "

"Oh." Everyone...are they all the same?I figured I wasn't the only one who was particularly bad. Everyone has certain dissatisfaction and shortcomings in their subjective consciousness.Qingwei's self-criticism is also derived from such emotions, and even Qinmei's decision is the same. I'm afraid even Arikawa also has disgust for himself in his heart.In order to make up for the flaws, or to break away from myself, I put on the clothes of the characters, figure out the thinking mode of the characters, and use the soul of the characters to make up this "I".Just because I don't like my own existence, I can fully enter the role. Is this a vicious circle?I do not think so.

It is an undeniable fact that there will be so-called "longing" thoughts in anyone's heart.For actors, singers or athletes, and even the bosses, teachers, seniors around you... you may have had thoughts of longing, although it doesn't matter if you don't.We... no, at least myself, look forward to others, and engage in role-playing with such a mood.When I dream of Rei Ayanami, I put on Rei Ayanami's clothes. When I dream of Chacha, I imitate Chacha's movements and laugh cheerfully. I don't think these behaviors are unnatural at all, just like some people will cut with their favorite singers. Hairstyles, clothes, and food are all the same.

"Huh? What's the matter, Xiao Hai? You are so silent, did you go to the toilet?" "Ah, no." I woke up. "Nothing." "By the way, I actually called you because I have something to contact." "Contact?" What's the matter? "Tomorrow, that... what is it called? It's that one, the hall where the event was held last time." "Ah, that's called...the McShamburg building?" "Yes, yes, it should be there. There will be an event tomorrow, Qin Mei said." "Huh, really?" I tightened my grip on the microphone again.

"I didn't lie to you, and there seems to be an on-site sales event that you can participate in freely. Of course, role-playing is absolutely fine." "Oh……" "How about it, do you want to go? Although it's very temporary." "What time does it start?" "Uh, wait a minute, let me see...from ten thirty in the morning to three in the afternoon." "Go to school." "Skipping class." "That's right." I replied immediately, anyway, I skipped classes to participate in activities not once or twice. "Okay, let's have fun together—" Qingwei cheered up and said, "Even for Youchuan's sake, let's cheer together...what the hell am I talking about." She forced a smile.

Then we chatted nonsense for a few more minutes, then hung up, and I put the microphone down and stood still for a while.It seems that Qingwei is quite depressed about Arikawa's death, his voice is full of ebb and sadness, there is no way, an important friend has been killed, this is a natural reaction... I went back to my room and opened the closet, which was full of cosplay clothes (clothes and accessories that are afraid of wrinkling are stored in the storage room). Human emotions are such a wonderful thing, you can be sad and happy at the same time.I took out one of the clothes and compared it in front of the big mirror I bought in the shopping mall. I was dressed by the maid, whether it was my hands, chest, or thoughts, it was me and the maid at the same time. one.

It’s really hot-blooded——I remembered what classmate Jing said, and smiled slightly. Indeed, my transformation ability has reached level one, but... the real me is only level three. It can be said that there is no progress at all. Is it a wrong choice? Do you have a practice project? However, it is tantamount to mediocrity to delve into this kind of problem. I don't like mediocrity, so I gave up thinking and started to choose the style I will wear tomorrow. It took about twenty minutes to decide to play Naka Lulu.It's better to be mainstream. I don't want to be as paranoid as Arikawa. If you don't understand the role you are playing, it will become just an ordinary masquerade party. The two are fundamentally different.I put on a Naka Lulu outfit with a special pattern of ethnic style. The whole body is based on white with red lines drawn. From the perspective of clothing design, I also think it is very good.Then put on the belt, insert the dagger, and tie the red headband.

The me in the mirror—the Naka Lulu in the mirror, it is no longer clear which is the "me".From Katori Yumi to Naka Lulu, in a word, this is called escape.It is escaping, I am escaping, of course I am conscious of this, but why not?It is wrong to think that avoidance is wrong, is this prejudice itself wrong?what-- As Nakalulu, I took off the red headband and checked again with my eyes. Sure enough, the edge of the belt was cracked by about ten centimeters. Was it caught by something?Opening the sewing box, I found that the red thread was unfortunately used up.It's 8:45 in the evening, I changed into normal street clothes and went out to do some shopping. Surrounded by warm and dry wind, I walked on the street, and my destination was a tailor shop called "Dark Henry".I make all my styling accessories myself, because styling is (to put it a bit of an exaggeration) a varnish for yourself, so accessories made by someone else's hands wouldn't suit me, wouldn't it? The store was isolated outside the downtown area. I went in and began to pick out items. The appearance and interior of the store were completely different from the candy house in fairy tales, but I had the illusion of walking into a fairy tale world. I bought red thread and After knitting, my mood went up, so I started to wander out of the store and didn't go back immediately. Under the moonlight, the street at night looked different from usual, and then I found a strange road on the familiar street. Behind the buildings, there was a hill with a ski resort, hidden in the dense forest. A trail...is there supposed to be?Never found out.Of course, no one usually pays attention to this kind of place, and it's nothing strange if you don't know it. I stood in front of the trail, and because it was very dark, I couldn't see what it looked like inside, but I was sure there was a distance. I have an indescribable feeling, staring at this forest path, and somehow... I am attracted.In other words, it seems to be called, perhaps for no reason, or even meaning.I take a step. "Okay, don't move." A stern voice came from my back, forcing me to stop. There was a force in that voice.As soon as I turned around, Jing was standing behind me. Her eyes seemed to pass through me, staring directly at the end of the path. The white sailor suit looked like a cave in the dark. "Student Mirror?" "I forgot to bring the keys, so I can't go home." Jing's voice was like metal, and she reached out to brush her bangs blown by the wind. "Really, things like keys are simply superfluous." "Excuse me……" "It's wise not to go there." Classmate Jing pointed to the paper bag in my hand and said, "Even if you have a ball of thread that guides the maze from Ariane in Greek mythology, or sprinkles bread crumbs on the road Oh. Wow, what a cool line, so handsome." "what?" "Although I don't know what that place is, it shouldn't be a pleasant place to go in." Kagami nodded several times in the dark. "Let's go back." "Ah, but—" I glanced at the deserted path, with dense bushes on both sides, and the gravel road on the ground, which was full of strong discomfort. Even so, I was still strangely attracted.Besides, why do I have to obey the orders of Student Mirror?No one has the right to restrict the free will of others, and this is not a school.Probably my thoughts surfaced on the expression. Classmate Jing glanced at me, curled his lips, played with the schoolbag on his knees, and asked me in a low voice if I had something to say. "Eh, ah, no..." The stubborn self in my mind will not be expressed so easily. "No, nothing." "I'm... saving you now, you didn't realize it at all, did you?" "Help me?" What was she talking about? "Go back quickly, you don't want to be killed?" "Killed?" "Are you a parrot? It depends on what you want to do." "Uh, ah..." After being told by her, I hesitated for a few seconds, and could only force out my own doubts: "Student Jing, do you know what's on the other side of the road?" "There is a strange warehouse, and the iron gate is closed." "Why would you... be killed if you went there?" "I don't know, so what should I say?" Jing looked up to the right, making a standard movement of thinking. "It's revenge... No, it's a bit strange to say that." She fell into deep thought. "Uh, that—" I felt like I should leave. "Then I'll go back first..." "Feather." "what?" "You, are you doing something with that transfer student?" "Huh?" The so-called transfer student, of course, refers to Ayaka. "Is something going on?" she asked again. "What are you talking about... Which thing are you referring to?" I lowered my head reflexively.Why be nervous?Obviously, he didn't do anything wrong. "Aren't you pretending to be stupid? Let me just say it straight. You guys are investigating Shimada's incident, right?" She hit it off.Classmate Jing immediately saw through my guilty expression, and it was true that it was written in his eyes. "Why... would you know?" "Because I can see it." "What can you see?" "If I could choose, I would actually like the ability to stop time." Student Jing answered irrelevantly, and then showed a mysterious smile. "Ah, but if you can only stop for nine seconds, it's useless at all." "Uh, may I ask—" "There's nothing to investigate. Everyone is dead." "But—" I resisted her sarcastic remarks, but I didn't have the courage to look directly at Jing in the dark. "But what?" "But, Shimada was killed. If my friend is killed, I will definitely want to find the murderer and bring him to justice..." "Yumi, if you really think it's a friend—" Mirror-san's eyes seemed to be facing a stubborn guy: "If it's really a friend, why didn't you help Shimada when he was alive? " "I..." I was speechless. "What you're doing now is nothing more than creating an image for yourself." Is it a tense relationship, my cheek throbbed. "Forget all the empty lines, I'm serious." I couldn't refute, and I couldn't hide anything from her eyes. Classmate Jing had completely seen through my bad mentality.It was humiliating, and a sense of shame and emptiness expanded inside of me. "Can you recognize your position?" Jing's voice drifted away with the warm wind, giving the illusion of whispering in his ear. "Yumei, you are just a powerless ordinary person, you should understand it yourself?" What cruel words. "You can't exceed your limit, and you can't miscalculate your position, so let it go, there is no room for you to be troublesome." "That's not it!" I shouted to classmate Jing. "It's really a fox pretending to be a tiger." Student Jing criticized briefly. "Then I am Kamui, Kamui, Xiaotiao's lover." "Even if it's me... Even if it's me, there is something that can be used." My heart is about to explode, I don't know if it's because of anger or humiliation, an unprecedented impulse is boiling strongly. "That's good, yes." Student Jing nodded vigorously. "Now just head back home and go to bed and look forward to tomorrow's event, which is where you -- right now, can come in handy." "Don't look down on people!" "It's not a bad thing to flee to the strong to be flattered, it's a very practical social life." "What's the meaning……" "So, it's wrong to miscalculate your own strength, and you will get into trouble. Yumi, you should know Nobita's classmate Xiaofu." "Why?" I gritted my teeth, clenched my fists, and my throat hurt. "Why do you say such things?" "I don't want to save the weak, and I'm not a brave person, and...a kid is about to fall off the cliff, and I won't take the risk to catch him." "I don't understand..." "What I mean is, you have to protect your body by yourself." Classmate Jing narrowed his eyes at me. "Think about it, most of the unimportant characters will be sacrificed, right?" Although it was embarrassing, I still cried, and the tears were completely involuntary.It was something other than emotion that made me cry, because my heart was very calm, and the temperature of emotion was far from the boiling point. These are the best proofs.So, what made me cry? No matter how dark it was, I didn't want to be seen with tears and snot dripping from my face, so I immediately squatted down, put the paper bag on the ground, covered my face with my hands, and then fell into uncontrollable sobs, and What's more embarrassing than this? "It seems like I've turned into a villain." Student Jing only said this to my tears. "Okay." She turned and walked away from me. "Come on, everyone, I've been waiting for a long time! It's time for me to set off, the long wait will not be in vain, come on, do a good job!" Stepping on a brisk and hateful pace——Student Jing left, and I was left to cry alone.I don't want to be abandoned, I don't want to be alone...