Chapter 29 28. Whispering mud and dust

On May 14, 1938, this day is meaningless to ordinary people, but it is very important to Vautrin.If this date is three years later—the day after three years will be the day when Vautrin bids farewell to this world. People can't imagine: a kind-hearted, enthusiastic person, every cell in his body is full of vitality, but after only three years, he is desperate for life and turns on the gas valve to commit suicide... Vautrin died at her home - her hometown in Illinois, USA.No one was around when she died, not even her own brother was present at her funeral.Why did such a goddess, who is called "Holy Mother" and "Guanyin Bodhisattva" by the Chinese, go so desolately and lonely?

We later learned that Vautrin suffered from severe depression.And we also know that the reason why Vautrin suffers from depression is entirely because in the last three years in Nanjing, she suffered from all kinds of harassment and cruelty from the Japanese army every day, and at the same time she had to provide for tens of thousands of people who took shelter in Jinling. The safety and survival of women and children in women's liberal arts colleges. Just the day before May 14, 1938, when Vautrin was sitting in the office arranging the schedules for the fall semester of junior high school and high school for the children she had protected, an old lady surnamed Jiang came to see her with her daughter.The old lady told Vautrin that she had a 53-year-old son who had been suffering from lung disease for several years and had a wife and children; the other son of the old lady was 33 years old and worked in a rice mill and earned 50 dollars a month. Wife and 4 children.The whole family of 9 people is supported by this 33-year-old son.At the end of last year, the whole family fled to Jiangbei, ran out of money and goods, and encountered Japanese soldiers when they were desperate. The 33-year-old son was regarded as a "Chinese soldier" and stabbed to death by the Japanese with a bayonet.The old lady begged Vautrin to take in her whole family, otherwise her whole family would die.

After hearing this, Vautrin was heartbroken and helpless—because the old lady and her daughter-in-law had already knelt in front of her, begging her to give their family a bite to eat. Just after the eight members of this family were arranged, another person came to report to Vautrin that something happened to an old lady named Liu.Mrs. Liu lives near Sanpailou. She has 3 sons and 2 daughters-in-law. Four nights ago, two Japanese soldiers broke in through the window of her house, unable to open the door.The Japanese soldiers asked her to hand over her two daughter-in-laws, but Mrs. Liu refused, so the Japanese soldiers slashed her face twice, and then stabbed her in the chest again... Later, the two daughter-in-laws of the family were raped by the Japanese soldiers.

"They want to take refuge with you now, is it possible?" It turned out that the man came to help the Liu family inquire about the situation. Vautrin did not answer.Although the overcrowded campus did not allow one more person to enter, Vautrin's conscience told her that she could not refuse. Three years later, on May 14, Vautrin died. But on this day in 1938, we see Vautrin as a goddess of hope and vitality. "We already have more than 250 students! In this way, they must be divided into 6 classes. On this day next week, the children can return to class again! I am so happy for them!" This morning, Vautrin said from After sitting up on the bed, she sat down at the desk and studied hard—she was dividing the children into classes and arranging teachers for them.When Cheng Ruifang brought her grandson to ask her to go to church together, Vautrin expressed her feelings to her friend so happily.

Just after 8 o'clock, when they returned to school after church, Vautrin found that her "little guard" Huli had fallen ill and died not long after. "My lord, how pitiful it is!" Vautrin was very sad.This is the third beloved puppy she has lost in less than a year.Especially little Huli, who is small but sensible, squatting at the door every day, guarding Vautrin.When encountering strangers, it will definitely "bark" a few times unceremoniously, and it will not stop "fighting" until Vautrin gives "let go" or other orders.The death of little Huli made Vautrin vow never to keep a dog again.

"They have no good fate with me," she explained.Could it be that she is implying something somewhere? Vautrin never told anyone what was on her mind.People can only see her in action - working and working every day for the fate of the women and children she took in. The following things are recorded sporadically in her diary—— May 19th: Today we helped a widow with 5 kids and we gave her $5 cash to keep her 2 older daughters here and take the 3 younger kids with her , she tried to do some kind of small business with the meager $5.Her 20-year-old son, who was the breadwinner for the family, was taken away and may never return.Yesterday, a woman with 3 children also received 5 dollars. Her husband was killed when the Japanese entered the city, and she has to work hard to start a new life... Mrs. Cheng discussed with me and decided to end on September 1 , we will try our best to select 100 most needy women and girls and build a handicraft school for them.

May 23: From 9:00 am to 11:30 am, we held the closing ceremony of the "Third Training Course for Refugee Institutes", with 353 students attending. All 33 classes demonstrated what was learned.No grades, no exams, no diplomas, but great content and genuine interest demonstrated.They sang many songs, the Chinese class translated excerpts from classics, some told stories, and many recited passages from the Bible.A little girl about 9 years old vividly tells a story.She had been sick and unable to attend rehearsals, but she came anyway.The poultry class has prepared a conversation that showcases some of the key learnings they have learned.I can fully imagine that when these women are old, they will tell their grandchildren about the days when they were refugees at Jinling Women's Liberal Arts College.

May 24: We convened a special committee meeting of the head of the refugee office at 5 Ninghai Road to re-attempt to determine the minimum number of people who must be helped to start their lives again... Jinling Women's Liberal Arts College now has: None 32 young women who were homeless and lost their parents, 672 young women who were homeless and had no relatives, 237 young women who were homeless and very poor, homeless and living in dangerous areas 127 young women, 16 homeless widows, and 7 lame, blind and helpless. May 25: In the morning, I spend a long time meeting with clients.The first group were poor women, one of whom lost 3 sons, and the other 2 women both lost 2 sons.I'm sure if something like this happened to me, I wouldn't be able to face life as bravely as they are now.A woman with $1 capital is trying to start a small business.No one can blame them for selling cigarettes or even opium, because they have to live.Mills and I had long discussions about what to do with the approximately 1,000 impoverished refugees when the six refugee camps closed.

May 28: This morning, I distributed $6 capital each to 3 very poor women who had one or more sons taken away and are now helpless.Since I first met them, they have been planning with other members of their family how to make a living, one of whom intends to sell fans, soap, and candles; another and her daughter will open a small laundry.They are extremely grateful for this assistance and solemnly pledge to capitalize this fund.The small sum of money which I have used for this purpose was raised by a group of people in the United States and transferred through Miss Simpson. May 31: At 6 o'clock tonight, Mrs. Cheng hosted a picnic on the balcony of Nanshan Apartment for all the staff who had been eating in Building 400. At eight, Mary joined the group that was having a game night.We have to keep normal life for the sake of young people, but for me it's hard to laugh and be happy when I'm constantly thinking about those battlefields and cities that are being bombed today.

………… The last entry in Vautrin’s Diary that the author can see is April 14, 1940, before she was about to leave Nanjing to return to the United States.In this day's diary, Vautrin wrote at the beginning: "I am almost exhausted. In the past, although the work progressed slowly, I was able to make a work plan step by step, but now I can't even do this, and my hands are weak. Listen to me. I hope I can go on vacation right away, but who will worry about the experimental class? Sometimes I think it is better to stop the experimental class and start a new class with more emphasis on students' hands-on ability on a new basis, but to do At this point, where can I find a teacher?"

Vautrin was too tired.She finally fell ill - couldn't sleep every day, vomited whenever she spoke... she fell down, at her post. On May 14, 1940, with the help of American church friends, Vautrin returned to her homeland.When leaving Nanjing, China, Cheng Ruifang and hundreds of refugees who had been rescued by her spontaneously saw her off and prayed for her in the church... Prayed over and over, blessed over and over again, like the Virgin Mary— In the hearts of the Chinese people and Nanjing citizens, Vautrin is such a beautiful, benevolent and eternally loving Mary.Although her body is placed in a meadow in Sheppard Township, Michigan, on the other side of the ocean, her spirit and soul will remain forever in the ancient oriental country - China. "If I could live again, I would still serve the Chinese people." This is what Vautrin said when she left China.People in her hometown condensed this sentence into the words "Jinling eternal life", which were engraved on Vautrin's tombstone. Miss Hua - Vautrin - "Avalokitesvara" - Jinling Eternal Life.These four different titles are given by Nanjing people to a great woman like the Virgin, and only Vautrin deserves such titles and evaluations.To a certain extent, it is the cruelty and evil deeds of the Japanese invaders that made such a Holy Mother. Her departure also made the citizens of Nanjing have an extra account of blood and tears when they liquidated the crimes of the Japanese invaders!