Chapter 25 into darkness again

The gray light in front of my eyes gradually went out, and I fell into darkness again. I thought, the people in the villa will never come to rescue me again.I don't know why they gave up on me. If I were them, I would be left alone, and I would dig out the living people buried in the ruins with my hands.I don't hate them, it's their right to save or not to save them, I respect their own choice. The coming of night again scares me. In fact, fear, hope, pain, anger, irritability, grievance, peace... these emotions have been alternating in my brain. A woman once asked me, "Are you afraid of death?"

I asked her back, "What about you?" She smiled and said, "Of course!" I said: "Then there is no need to ask, only the dead are not afraid of death. But can people not die?" The fear of death does not only appear in the deep ruins, even when you are alone on some ordinary days.It's a very vulnerable moment, when you suddenly feel hopeless, everything in your life becomes dull, and you feel like a person on the verge of death.In fact, the sky outside the window was still clear at that time, and the flowers in the garden were still in full bloom.Fear of death at such a time is obviously very hypocritical.

The fear at this time went deep into the bone marrow. So true. I don't know of anyone who would not be afraid in such a situation. I appear extremely humble. In the darkness, it seemed as if a devil grinned and stretched out its sharp claws, inserted into my chest, grabbed my heart, and pinched it vigorously. My heart ached unbearably. I felt the blood in my heart being squeezed dry by the devil's hand. The poison of fear invaded my internal organs, and I cried out, "No! No! I don't want to die, don't—" When people die, everything is gone.No thoughts, no language, no relatives, no friends, no... despair!

Someone will collapse in fear, lose the will to live, and scare themselves to death. Will I suffocate in fear? No, no, I don't want to die! I want to live! Give me the strength to get me through this long night...