Chapter 20 Afterlife
I leave this record with Father Saryon, so that he may open it if I die in my first encounter with the enemy.
enemy.
I call them enemies, but how many of them have become my friends in the past ten years?I can't help but think back to the people who took such good care of my wife, and the people who helped me through those first, scariest months, when I too was terrified that I was going crazy.If word of what I was doing got to them, I think they'd understand, because they had fought him too—the one called the Magician—for a lot longer than I had.
I will tell you all about it, you who read this record.As an aside, I have been thinking, who will be the readers of this article, my old friend Prince Jarod, or my old enemies Xavier and Archbishop Vanya?I guess that's all right, because in this conflict, you, my readers, will all find yourselves on the same side.I will therefore record everything that happens to me in as much detail as I can, trying to explain it as best I can.If you are forced to fight alone against this enemy, it is imperative that you get to know this enemy well.
Let me start from the beginning, maybe I should tell you the results first.
First, I can't tell you much about how I felt and what I thought when I walked into—or I thought I walked into—death, and into the realm of the afterlife.I lost my self-control at the time and the darkness took hold of me.This darkness is diagnosed as a psychopathy by those in what I call the afterlife, a word they use to describe a mental disorder that is not caused by biological factors.
Not long after I returned to Simharon, Father Saryon asked: When I decided to die, did I consciously consider that prophecy, and whether I was actively trying to fulfill the prophecy for revenge on the world ?
I considered the words of the "prophecy" again.As you can probably imagine, those words have always been etched on my heart, just as Bishop Vanya once threatened to inscribe the image of the "Dark Sword" on my stone chest.
Among the descendants of the royal family, there will be born a person who has no magic power at all, but can survive.When he faces death again and survives his return, the end of the world will be in his hands—
If I could answer Father Saryon's question and say "yes," I thought, I would be a great man, at least to show that I was sober and sane.Unfortunately, I was out of my mind at the time.Looking back, I see how cocky and proud and self-centered I was back then.So it's a miracle that I have the physical and mental strength to survive.I did survive, and that must be attributed to Father Saryon, not to me.
Before the sentence of transformation, I spent those days alone in the cell.It was there that my mind was overwhelmed by a dark force lurking within, and fear and despair took possession of me.Suddenly discovering my biological parents, my origins, my bizarre experience growing up, and knowing what my future destiny will be in order not to make the prophecy come true.All of this is driving me crazy.That day, when I stood on the sand, unconscious of what was going on around me, I might have been turned into a stone statue.
The terrible, noble, and loving sacrifice of Father Saryon shone like a ray of light into my darkened soul.In that light, I see the unhappiness I bring upon myself and those I love.I was completely absorbed in the grief of not being able to love because I woke up too late, and sickened by the corruption I saw in the world.I know that corruption is reflected in me too.My only thought was to remove the misfortune I had brought to this world, and I plunged the Dark Sword into Saryon's lifeless hand, and went to die.
I was so lost in my own despair that I didn't know that Gwendelyn was right behind me.I remember hearing her voice tell me to wait for her just as I was stepping into the mist, and maybe even hesitated for a moment.But my love for her, like everything else in my life, is a selfish love.I pushed her out of my thoughts as the icy mist hit me, and I didn't think about her again until I found her lying unconscious on the other side.
on the other side.
I can almost see the parchment trembling in your hands as you read this.
that side.
I walked for a long time, but I don't know how long, because time has been wrapped and changed by the magic area surrounding this world, so that it is cut off from the rest of the universe.The only thing I'm aware of, is that I've been walking, and beneath my feet, is the hard ground, and I'm lost in a kind of gray nothingness.
I don't remember being intimidated at all, but I think I must have been pretty shocked.But, I've heard from people I've known in the afterlife—people who've crossed magical borders—that doesn't scare me at all, because I'm already a living dead.And for those with magic, it can be a terrifying experience.Those who were lucky enough to survive and remain sane (few, indeed) find it difficult to talk about it again.I will never forget the terrified look I saw in Gwendoline's eyes when she opened them for the first time until the day I died.
I think it may have been that I, in my desperate and irrational state of mind, continued on indifferently through that gray, unpredictable fog until I slowly fell, died, and—then— That moment took away my breath—the mist also disappeared, and like a person who stepped out of a thick fog and found himself bathed in bright sunlight, I also walked out of the kingdom of death (I did think so), standing in an open grassy field.
It was a clear and pleasant night.The night sky above me—yes, there was a sky at the time—was very still, dark, and every inch of it was covered with twinkling stars, and I never knew there were so many of them.The air was very cold and fresh, and a full moon sprinkled silver light on the earth.I took a deep breath and let it out and breathed it out again - I don't know how long I did this - and I just stood there and breathed.The darkness rose from my mind and I thought about what I had done and felt for the first time in my life that I had done something right, something good.
My religious literacy was neglected during my messy childhood, and as I grew older, I lacked faith in either humans or myself, which eventually led me to Emin too.I think very little about life after death, and if I do, it's just a fear of it.After all, life to me is just a day-to-day annoyance, so why should I prolong it?But at that very moment, I believed I had found paradise - the beauty of the night, the peace and stillness that enveloped me, and the joy of being alone...
My soul soared with joy, quietly into the night sky, while my body stubbornly insisted on living, and insisted on using its weakness to remind me of the fact that I was still alive.A cold wind blew across the grass. I was shirtless and naked except for a pair of worn and discarded trousers that Dukes gave me in prison.I began to shiver with cold, no doubt a natural reaction to my recent experience.I was also hungry and thirsty, because in captivity I refused to eat and drink.
That's when I started wondering where the hell I was and how I got here.In all directions there was only the endless, moonlit prairies, and I could see nothing.And yet—strangely—about a hundred feet away, there was a bright red flash.I think the light has always been shining there, but my soul just kept floating with the stars and didn't notice it.
With some vague idea, I walked towards the red light.In retrospect, it might have been a coal fire, which can only show that I was out of my mind, or else I would have realized that no fire could ever go on and on and off that consistently.As I struggled toward the light, I spotted Gwen.
She was lying on the grass, unconscious.I knelt down beside her, hugged her tightly, and didn't think about why she was here.Only now did I recall hearing her cry when I stepped into the thick fog, and I also vaguely remembered her fluttering white dress.Maybe we've been so close all this time and didn't know it because the fog was so thick.But that's okay too, everything seems to be correct somehow.
When I touched her, she woke up.In the moonlight, her face was clearly identifiable.That was the moment I saw the madness in her eyes.I know what this madness is about—how could I not?It accompanied me through my whole childhood.However, it was many months before I admitted this to myself.Of course, at that moment I didn't admit it.
"Gwendelyn!" I called softly, rocking her in my arms.
Hearing my shout, the frightened expression in her eyes faded.She looked up at me with love in her eyes, the same kind of love that I was once so blessed to have, a blessing that I once turned into a curse.
"Joran!" she called softly, reaching out to touch my face.
I saw the image of myself in her eyes, and the image began to flicker, then dimmed, and panic and madness drove me from her vision.I hugged her tightly, as if her body was going away from me, her body was still in my arms, but I couldn't stop her soul from leaving.
The wind blew up on the prairie, a white light illuminated the night sky, followed by rumbling thunder.Looking up, the darkness is devouring the stars, like a giant beast slowly crawling across the sky, thunder and lightning flashed between heaven and earth.The storm isn't here yet, but the wind is so strong that it almost knocks me to the ground.Clouds were coming quickly towards us and I saw the moon being obscured and smelled the rain and felt it hit my face.
I couldn't believe how quickly the storm came.I looked around in panic, and there was nowhere to hide.We were helpless in the wilderness, and there was a deafening thunder beside me, and I saw large chunks of soil flying into the sky.The wind was getting stronger, whistling in my ears.Bean-sized raindrops poured down, slanting rain and lightning intertwined.Although I tried my best to block Ge Wen with my body, we were still drenched in an instant.
I must seek assistance!Lightning danced around us, the wind continued to surge, and hailstones slammed into my face, hurting my skin.It was pitch black all around, except for the occasional lightning that illuminated the sky and the earth as bright as day.Then, through the rain curtain, I saw the red light flickering on and off, obviously unaffected by the storm.Perhaps there were people there surrounding the red light, using their life force to keep the flame alive.I lifted Ge Wen and walked towards the red light with her in my arms. For the first time in my life, I didn't secretly pray for myself, praying that Emin would send someone to rescue her.
I don't know who I expect to be around the firelight.I wouldn't be too surprised to see a devil or an angel, I'd be glad to see either of them, we don't live long in a storm like this.Things are getting worse.In the midst of my panic, I had a dreamlike thought that came and went, that the storm was pounding hard at the boundaries of this world, trying to destroy it.
Several times, I couldn't move forward at all under the huge force of the gale, and several times, I had to use all my strength just to keep myself on my feet.I hugged Gwen's cold, motionless body and let her cling to my side, letting the wind and rain blow, and the raindrops and ice cubes pricked my skin like needles.
With tenacious will, I persisted to the end, and finally reached the place where the red light was.It turned out that it was not a pile of fire, and there were no people around, no devils, and no angels.The flickering red light emanated from an odd-looking object propped on the wet ground, and strangely, it wasn't hot to the touch either.I suddenly became depressed and hopeless.My legs went limp, and I was still holding Ge Wen in my arms, and I collapsed to the ground.
That's when I heard a rumbling sound from the storm, getting louder.I felt the ground shaking, and the lightning flashed almost continuously.Through the rain curtain, by the lightning, I saw a huge monster crawling towards us.Its squat, angular body protrudes from the front of its two gigantic gleaming eyes, and it's coming down towards us with incredible speed.
That's it.I wonder.We are sure to be torn to pieces by this filthy monster.Darkness once again occupied my mind.The last thought I can remember is to be thankful that Gwen is unconscious, will end her life without knowing it, and not have to suffer this final fear.
They said I was conscious when I was found, and they said I said something to them.To them—because they don't understand what I'm saying—I look like I'm up for a fight to the death.They told me—and they recalled it with a smile—that I was too weak to beat a child.My struggle was vulnerable, and soon, I passed out.
As for me, I can't remember anything, and I didn't wake up until I heard the voices of many people. At that time, I was terrified.I slowly calmed myself down, and it turned out that it was a dream!My heart was pounding in hope.Everything—the interrogation, the sentencing, the execution, the storm... was just a dream.As soon as I open my eyes, I will find myself in the home of Lord Samuels again...
I opened my eyes, the blinding light hurt my eyes.My bed was so hard that I slept very uncomfortable, and I suddenly realized I was inside something made of iron.We seemed to be moving, and I felt the swaying back and forth, making me dizzy.My dreams are too real.
But still the sound of someone talking could be heard.I sat up and blocked the glare with my hands, trying to see what happened.
Those voices are right next to you.I vaguely saw two figures standing beside me.Because of the shaking of the iron guy, they walked staggeringly, and when they saw me sitting up, they came over.
I couldn't understand anything the man said.He seemed to know this too, for as he spoke he patted my shoulder lightly, as if to soothe a frightened child.
I wasn't intimidated.Emin saved me!After all this, I thought, nothing can scare me anymore.My only reminder is that poor girl who gave up everything for me, where is she?I looked around, but there was no sign of her.I tried to get up, but the man held me—he held me very lightly.At that time, it was not difficult to keep me still. I didn't even have the strength to sit for a long time.
At that time, another person in the iron guy had been talking to someone else, and the answering voice was a little hoarse.
I know now, of course, that he was speaking to a communication dialogue device installed in his buggy—a vehicle similar to a horse-drawn carriage, only driven by dark crafts instead of magic.I still clearly remember what he said, although I didn't know what it meant at the time.For months after that, I struggled with madness, and his words rang out in my dreams at night.
"We've checked the alarm and it's just the two of them on the border this time, a man and a woman." I don't remember anything after that.The man kneeling next to me put something cold on my arm, and I fell into a deep sleep.
When I woke up, I found myself and Gwen transported to a new world - or you will think a very old world - to start a new life.I married poor Gwen to give her a life of security and stability.I spent some time each day with her in a quiet and pleasant place where the doctors of the afterlife tried their best to heal her.
Ten years passed... ten years in our new world...she never spoke a word to me or to any living being, only to those only her eyes could see, she was Talking to the dead—the undead.
I met many people in the realm of the afterlife, and one of them was not from the realm of the afterlife, but a person in the same world as me. His name was Manju, but he claimed to be a magician.During those ten years, I spent a lot of time learning his true nature and trying to find ways to prevent him from taking power.
Here, I don't have time to describe the afterlife, nor is it the intent of this record to describe the afterlife.It can be said that the realm of the afterlife is a world of technology, a place that is difficult for you to understand.No matter what I say, you will find it hard to understand and even harder to believe what I say.Alas, maybe in the future you will understand...
As this article draws to a close, I will leave you with some thoughts about our world and how it is connected to the universe.I pray that some of you will be wise enough to understand and accept it instead of closing your eyes to it as you have done for hundreds of years.
Persecuted for being alien, ancient mages fled what they believed to be a dying world—a world increasingly reliant on technology, one that denied, or even feared, magic.They traveled through time and space to find a place where they could live in peace and tranquility.It is no accident that they came to this world, because there is the source of magic power in the universe, and the mages came here under the guidance of magic.As soon as they reached this enchanted shore, the ancients burned their ships and swore never to leave.
Not only did they cut off all ties with the old world, but they also built a barrier around this world so that no one from outside this world could enter it.However, this magical barrier is so strong that it not only shuts out the universe, it also seals magic in.
The ancients wanted to make their present safe and secure, they destroyed the past, instead of preserving the memory of the old world to perpetuate it - so that they would be reminded that that world still existed outside - they destroyed all records , to erase all memory.Until now, for you, the legend that has become the mouth of the saints of the family is even more illusory than the kingdom of goblins.
Because you have forgotten that there is another world outside, it is so far away, so you feel safe and secure, safe and secure enough for you to expel those who you think do not belong to this world, even those who are dead, so you go The custom of sending people to the "land of the afterlife" evolved.This is a means of dealing with those heretics cleanly, and it expels the aliens from the world quickly and effectively.The punishment was so horrendous that it was a fairly effective deterrent.However, what you don't realize is that you sent these mages out, not to kill them, but to bring them back to life.
Though we have forgotten them, the afterlife has never forgotten us.Most of the magic was indeed sealed away from them, but a small part escaped, leaking through cracks in the barrier.The Afterlife was in desperate need of magic power, so until it had the means through the use of advanced technology, the people of the Afterlife came in search of magic.
Sure, they found it, but they couldn't get there.The magic barrier is too strong for them to get through.Instead, they find people who have been deported—like me and Gwen—to roam the land on our border.It was a dreadful place, full of violent storms like the ones I have been through.There is almost no human habitation here. This is a border area. People who come here have only one purpose, and that is to seek a way to obtain magic.
So they found us, so they found other people.Alarms were set up along the border: those flickering red lights could detect anything that moved.Whenever they could, they rescued the mages, so now the outcasts live in the afterlife.
Most of those mages are insane - like my poor Gwen.But there are also some people who are very sober, especially the self-proclaimed 'magician', who has tried countless times to cross the border and return.According to him, that barrier is an energy field composed of the magical energy stored in this world and the magical energy in each living creature. Those living people who have been exiled cannot go back because their own magical energy is harmful. They can't go back.As the poles of a magnet repel each other, so the magic of this world repels his magic.All these years, he'd been waiting for the world to go wrong, a mistake that would send him back into it.
I am your mistake.
A living dead man crosses a magical frontier, the spell is broken and the blockade is opened.I myself am a person with no magical energy, so not being ostracized, I can come back.If I did that, it would theoretically dissipate the magic field and let the door open when I came in.
After several months of research, the magician came to the same conclusion as I said above.You see, we weren't enemies forever, once I trusted and admired him - but that's another story.
Those in power have managed to convince me that these two worlds must merge and become one, and I think this will be a boon for Simharon in the end, I believe that the fusion of the two worlds will bring a new universe order.My dreams are bright, but other people's dreams are twisted.
And I came back... They came after me, bringing war.
They lied to me, they betrayed me, and I realize now that they came to conquer this world as they conquered other worlds.
Will the prophecy be fulfilled?Are we heading head-on to our destruction, like rocks rolling down a cliff?The idea is terrifying, and it's all the more terrifying when we feel we have no choice over our destiny; some omniscient, reckless master controls our puny beings from ages beyond Just control fate in your hands.
Is there no escape for us?I'm about to start thinking this way.The only two right and beneficial things I've done in my life—leave this world voluntarily, and come back to save it voluntarily—only to find that I'm bringing that prophecy closer and closer to being fulfilled.
If this is true, if our life is really dealt to us like a tarot card, and if we get knocked down and win a trick, or really lose as our opponents believe, Messed up, no longer wanting "life", then I will start to understand Sim Jin and his way of being in this world.
The game itself is meaningless, how to play is what matters.