Chapter 23 Chapter 21

For some time, Project Parasite seemed to have died down.Although the Titans still control the red zone, they will be noticed when they leave the red zone.And although we know that each slug controls one of our people, as if taking him hostage, but we no longer use this as a reason to rush and act recklessly.The current situation may last for a long time. The United Nations can't help at all.All the president wants is a simple cooperation, which is to implement the bareback program on a global scale.But they blamed each other and referred the matter to the committee for investigation.The real reason is simple: they don't trust us.Only the burnt know the intensity of the fire—a thing that is always extremely beneficial to the enemy.

Some countries are immune to slugs because of their social customs, Finns are used to stripping naked in groups and eagerly diving into steam baths every day, and those who don't get noticed.The Japanese also like to share baths.The oceans near the equator are also relatively safe, as are most of Africa.The French have long become avid advocates of nudity - at least on weekends, and slugs may not find it easy to hide in France. However, in countries where body covering is taboo, the slug can safely lurk until its host goes stale.Like the Commonwealth of Nations, Canada, UK, etc., especially the UK, they're like, "Dude, can't you have any other fun? Want to take off my underwear? Now? Fuck you!"

They flew three slug-possessed monkeys to London. I know that the King of England would like to follow the example of the President of the United States, but the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, encouraged by the Archbishop of Canterbury, firmly refused to let the King do this.The archbishop didn't even bother to look at our monkey.For him, morality is more important than the life and death of ordinary people.Under the cold eyes of neighbors, the flesh and blood of Britain cannot be exposed. Except for the occasions when the old man chooses me to work together, I have no access to core secrets.I see this war with the Titans the way a normal person sees a hurricane, seeing only a small part of what he can see.

I usually don't meet the old man directly, I only receive tasks from his deputy, Oldfield, so I don't know that Mary has relieved the responsibility of guarding the president.I bumped into Mary in the department lounge and yelled, "Mary!" and stumbled towards her. She gave me a sweet smile and moved aside to make room for me. "Hi, dear!" she murmured.She didn't ask me what I've been doing, didn't scold me for not contacting her, or even mention how long we hadn't been in touch.Mary always did that, letting the water behind the dam take care of itself.

I can't, I'm babbling, "That's great! I thought you were still tucking the president into bed. How long have you been here? Do you need to go back now? Hey, I Dial for your drink—oh, you've got it." I started dialing for an old-fashioned drink, only to find that Mary had already ordered it for me.The drink came out and was being delivered to my hand, "Huh? Why is there a drink?" "I'll order it as soon as you walk in." "What did you order? Mary, did I ever tell you you were amazing?" "No." "Very well, then I'm going to say: you're amazing!"

"thanks." I said again, "We need to celebrate. When did you get some free time? Hey. Isn't it possible for you to take a vacation? They can't expect you to be on duty 24 hours a day, week after week. I want to Go to the old man and tell him—" "I'm on vacation, Sam." "Tell him it's not okay to—huh?" "I'm on vacation right now." "Really? How long is the rest?" "On call, at call. That's how all holidays are arranged these days." "But how long have you been resting?" "Since yesterday. I've been sitting here waiting for you to show up."

"Yesterday!" I was giving a pediatric presentation to disinterested high-ranking dignitaries yesterday. "Uh, please," I stood up. "Stay here and stay still. I'll be right back." I rushed to the combat headquarters to work, asked to see the old man's first deputy, and repeatedly asked that I have something important to see him.Oldfield looked up at me when I entered, and asked roughly, "What do you want?" "Boss, you see, it's better to cancel the hypnotic story that I'm scheduled to tell!" "What's wrong?" "I'm a patient, and I'm supposed to be on sick leave long ago. From now on I'll have to ask for leave."

"Let me tell you, you're out of your mind." "Yes, I'm just mentally ill. Sometimes I have auditory hallucinations, I always feel that someone is following me, and I keep dreaming about being with the Titans." Regrettably, the last point I said is true. "Insanity is not an excuse for leave in this department." He leaned back, ready to discuss it with me. "Hey, allow me to take a vacation, or not?" He rummaged through the pile of papers on the desk, found one and tore it to shreds. "Okay, answer the phone at any time, at your disposal. Get out."

I backed out.When she entered the living room again, Mary raised her head and looked at me tenderly. I said to her, "Take your things and let's go." She stood up obediently without asking where she was going.I grabbed the drink and gulped down half of it, spilling the rest.The gang got up and went out, strolling silently on the sidewalks of the city. After a while, I asked, "Well, where do you want to get married?" "Sam, we've discussed this before." "Of course, we're going to get it done right now. Where are we going to get married?"

"Sam, Sam my dear, I will promise you, but I have to tell you that I am still against it." "why?" "Sam, let's go straight to my apartment. I want to cook for you." "Okay, you can cook, but not in your apartment. Also, we still have to get married first." "Please, Sam!" I heard someone say, "Keep it up, boy, she's going to get over it." I looked around and saw we were performing in front of a large crowd of roughs. I waved my arms and almost knocked over the young man who had been advising me.I yelled angrily, "Don't you guys have anything else to do? Go get a drink!"

Someone else said: "If you want me to say, he should quickly accept the benefits offered by her. After a while, I'm afraid there will be no such good things." I grabbed Marie's arm and led her away in a hurry. I didn't say a word on the way until I let her into a taxi, and after closing the cockpit and passenger doors, I whispered hoarsely, "Why don't you marry me? Tell me your reasons." "Why marry, Sam? I'm yours. You don't need a marriage contract." "Why do you say? Because I love you! That's why you get married, damn it!" She was silent for a while.I thought I bumped into her.I could barely hear her when she said, "You never said that before, Sam." "No? Well, I must have said that, I'm sure." "No, I'm pretty sure you didn't. Why didn't you?" "Well, I don't know, I think I'm slipping. I'm not sure about the meaning of the word 'love.'" "I'm not sure," she said softly, "but I like to hear you say it. Say it again." "Huh? Good. I love you, I love you, Mary." "Sam!" She leaned against my shoulder tightly, trembling with happiness.I shook my head slightly and asked, "What about you?" "Me? I love you, Sam. I really love you. I fell in love with you from—" I thought she would say that she fell in love with me the first time she saw me, but she said, "From the moment you slapped me, I fell in love with you." Is this in line with regular burial? I told the driver to just drive, and he plodded along the Connecticut coast.When he drove us to Westport, I told him to stop.We went straight to the town hall. I went to the counter of the License Examination Bureau and asked the staff there, "Is marriage registration done here?" "It's up to you," he replied, "on the left for hunting licenses, and on the right for dog licenses. Here, it's all about happy marriages." He squinted at me. I hate glib guys, this kind of gag is long gone. "Very good," I said, "Can you issue a marriage certificate for us, please?" "Of course, everyone should get married at least once, I always tell my wife that." He produced a large printed form and said, "Give me your numbers." We gave him the number.He stuck the form into a typewriter and took notes. "So—were you two ever married?" We both said no, and he said, "Are you sure? If you don't tell me the truth, I'll put a rider saying that if in other engagements, This engagement is void." We reiterate that we have no marriage history. He shrugged and said, "How long is the term? Is it a lifetime contract with a term? If it's more than ten years, the fee is the same as a lifetime contract. If it's less than six months, you don't have to pay. Go to the automatic contract on the wall over there." Take a brief form from the vending machine." I looked at Mary, and she said softly, "Marriage for life," The clerk was very surprised: "Ma'am, are you sure you know what you are doing? A renewable marriage contract has an automatic selection clause, which is exactly the same as a permanent marriage contract. Moreover, if you change your mind, you don't have to go through various court procedures." I said, "You heard the lady! Write it down." "Okay, okay, do the two parties choose to negotiate with each other or require both parties to abide by the marriage contract?" "It must be obeyed," I replied, and Mary nodded in agreement. "It must be complied with," he echoed, tapping the typewriter. "Now we come to the substantive stage of the question: who pays the living expenses, and how much? Salary or fund?" I said, "Salary." I didn't have enough money to put together a fund. Meanwhile, Mary said firmly, "Neither." "Huh?" the clerk said. "Neither way," repeated Mary. "There are no financial terms attached to this engagement." The clerk stopped, looked at me, then at Mary. "You see, ma'am," he said sympathetically, "don't be a fool, didn't you hear this gentleman say he was willing to support a family?" "No." "Didn't you talk to your lawyer in detail before you came to go through the formalities? There is a public communication center in the lobby outside." "No need to!" "Hi! Then I don't understand, what benefit can this marriage certificate bring you?" "No." Mary told him. "You mean you don't want to do it?" "I want to! Do as I say: 'Unpaid'." The clerk leaned back on the typewriter with a helpless face. He finally said: "I think that's all I need to fill in. Your marriage contract is really simple. I'll read it to you next, 'Would you two solemnly declare Sworn: The above facts are true to the best of your knowledge, do you fully believe that the marriage contract entered into was not influenced by drugs or other illegal inducements, and do you believe that there are no other marriage contracts or legal impediments to this marriage contract?'” After we both answered in unison, he took the form out of the typewriter.Said: "Press your thumbprint...Okay, pay ten dollars, including federal taxes." I paid, and he pushed the form into the copier, flipped it on, and said, "Copy will be sent to everyone at the coded address. Hmm—what kind of ceremony do you want? Maybe I can help." Mary told him, "We don't need religious services." I agreed. He nodded: "It just so happens that I have the person you need, old Dr. Chamre. He is a non-sectarian, the best stereo accompanist in this city, a private recital, and a full orchestra. No matter what work, he I can play for you, and I can hold a variety of ceremonies, with everything available, elegant and solemn. In the end, I will push the wedding to a climax with fatherly and frank advice, and I will feel the grandness of the wedding.” This time I said "no". "Well, don't be busy. Look!" said the clerk to me, "think of this lovely lady. If she keeps the vow she just made--I don't mean she won't, she won't have another chance to marry ...every girl deserves a proper wedding. Honestly - I didn't get kickbacks in the middle." I said, "Listen, you can get us married, can't you? Go ahead and get it done!" With a look of surprise on his face, he said, "Don't you know? Right now, you have to go through the formalities for yourself. From the time you two pressed your fingerprints on the license, you are already married?" I said, "Oh, got it." Mary said nothing, and we left. I rented a coupe from the landing pad in the north of the city. It was ten years old and smelled bad, but luckily it was fully automatic.I drove around the city, through New Manhattan, and put the car in the automatic. We didn't talk much, and it seems that there is not much need to talk at the moment.I was full of happiness but very nervous.Mary put her arms around me, and soon I was relieved and felt happier than I had ever been in my life. After a long time, it felt like only a short moment. I heard a short and sharp signal from the beacon at my mountain cabin. I let go of Mary and switched the car to automatic transmission. Stop the car. Mary asked in a daze, "Where are we?" "It's my mountain cabin," I told her. "Didn't realize you had a mountain cabin. I thought you were driving in the direction of my apartment." "Trying the bear trap over there? By the way, this isn't my cabin, it's ours." She kissed me again and I ended up with a mess when I landed.While I was still turning off the control panel, she quickly got out of the car.After I got out of the car, I found that she was staring at the cabin in a daze. "Honey, it's so beautiful!" "Yeah, there's nothing more beautiful in the Adirondacks than this," I echoed.A smear of mist, against the background of the sunset, is a wonderful scene, "I chose this house just because of the scenery here." She looked, and said, "Yes, yours, no, our cottage is beautiful. Let's go in." "True," I agreed, "but this house is very poor." Indeed, there is not even an indoor swimming pool.I deliberately arranged this way, I didn't come here to move the city with me.The outer shell of the house is a traditional fiberglass structure, but I inlaid it with log skin, unless it is scratched with a knife, it is no different from the real log. The interior is simple: a large living room with an actual wood-burning fireplace, a dark solid-coloured rug and lots of low chairs.All the facilities in the house are specially made. Except for the freezer and kitchen appliances, other electrical equipment such as air conditioners, power packs, cleaning devices, stereos, pipes, radiation alarms and servo systems are buried in the foundation, so that Out of sight, out of mind.Even the stereo monitor is covered up so you can't even notice it when it's not in use.People who want a natural wooden house and cannot do without modern equipment can only do this at best. Mary said earnestly: "This house is so lovely, I was afraid it would be a luxurious and extravagant place." "Neither you nor I like that tune;" I turned the combination lock, the front door opened, and Mary came in. "Hi! Come back!" I yelled. She snapped back, "What's wrong, Sam? What did I do wrong?" "Of course it's wrong." I pulled her to my side, shook her in my arms, and carried her across the threshold.I kissed her before putting her down, "Okay! You're home now. That's the only way to do it." The lights came on when we entered the house.She looked around, then turned and put her arms around my neck. "Oh dear, dear! I can't see, and my eyes are full of tears." So did I, we wiped away each other's tears, and she started walking around, looking here and there. "Sam, if I were to design it, I would design it in this style." "Too bad there's only one bathroom: we'll just have to make do," I said apologetically. "It's okay, I'm actually glad because I know you didn't bring any women here." "What woman?" "You know what women. If you were going to use this as a love nest, you'd be building a women's bathroom." "You know me so well." She didn't answer, but wandered into the kitchen.I heard her cry out. "What happened?" I hurriedly followed out. "I never expected to see such an authentic kitchen in a bachelor's house." "I'm not an ordinary cook. I wanted a kitchen, so I bought a kitchen set." "I'm so happy! Now, I really have to cook for you." "Here's your kitchen, as you like. But don't you want to wash it? Take a shower first if you want. Tomorrow we'll find a catalog and you can pick your own bathroom and have it flown in." She replied: "Don't worry, you wash first, I want to cook." I went to the shower first, wondering if she would have any problems using the kitchen buttons and menu system.I let the hot water soak through my skin while whistling. About fifteen minutes later, there was a light knock on the bathroom door.Through the frosted glass of the latticed door, I see Mary's profile. "May I come in?" she yelled. "Of course, of course! There's enough space." I opened the door and looked at her.She is so charming.For a while, she stood there for me to look at, a sweetness and coyness I had never seen before. I put on a rather surprised expression and said, "Baby, what's wrong with you? Are you uncomfortable?" She was surprised, with a blank face, and asked, "Me? What do you mean?" "You didn't have a gun with you, not anywhere." She giggled and jumped at me. "You idiot!" she screamed and tickled me.I grabbed her left arm and she countered with one of the most powerful moves in Japanese judo.Luckily I knew what to do and we both fell on the bathroom floor and she yelled, "Get me up! You got my hair wet." "It's okay!" I asked, but I didn't move, and I liked it. "I guess it's okay." She replied softly, kissing me.Then I helped her up and we rubbed each other's bruises and giggled.This is the most satisfying bath I have ever had. Mary and I lived as if we had been married for twenty years.Oh, and I'm not saying our honeymoon was tedious, or that we didn't need to know each other anymore.I mean, we seem to have a kind of understanding, knowing what is important to bring us together.Especially Mary, she knows better. I don't remember very well these days, but on the other hand, I remember every minute, every second.I felt extremely happy, but also a little bit apprehensive.My uncle Egbert used to get the same feeling with a jug of jade, but neither of us had any narcotics, not even time-extending tablets.I feel happy.For a long time, I had forgotten what happiness was like, so I didn't even know I wasn't happy.I used to be a lot of fun, happy, happy -- but not happy. We neither turn on the stereo nor read books.Only Mary sometimes read a few of my fairy tale books aloud.These books are priceless treasures left to me by my great-grandfather, who had never seen a book like this before.These books do not take people into the real world, they can only take readers far away from reality. The next day we went to the village and I wanted to show Mary around.People in the village thought I was a writer, and I wanted them to think so.I didn't intend to use the vacation to write anything, but I stopped and bought some typewriter vacuum tubes, a capacitor, and a roll of copy paper tape. I chatted with retail store owners about slugs and the bareback project, and of course continued to be a writer. There was a false alarm in the area that sent everyone into a panic, and there was something in a neighboring town: a local, absent-minded and in his shirt shirt, was shot and killed by an overwrought police officer in public.The shopkeeper was very indignant when he talked about it.I implied that he was in a state of war and that it was the person's fault. He shook his head, "To me, if we hadn't caused troubles, we wouldn't have this trouble at all. God never intended for humans to go to space. We should give up the space station and stay on the earth, so it will be peaceful .” I told him that the slugs came to Earth in their own spaceship and we didn't look for them.Marie winked at me, telling me to keep my mouth shut. The proprietor leaned toward me with his hands on the counter and asked, "Did we have this trouble before we went into space?" I have to admit no. "I'll just say it!" He smugly said. I have nothing to live for.How else can you tell? From here on.We didn't go to the village again, and we didn't contact anyone.On our walk home we passed the hut of the local solitary monk "Shepherd John".Some people say that John used to be a sheep breeder, and I think he is like that, and he tastes like it.He took care of the little things of the house for me: we treated each other with respect, that is to say, at a distance, seeing each other very briefly only when absolutely necessary.But seeing him now, I waved my hand. He also waved.He was dressed as usual, with a knit cap and an old army jacket.In shorts and sandals, I tried to remind him that someone nearby had been shot for disobeying the "barreled to the waist" order, but I refrained from saying so.Because John is a complete anarchist, advice will only make him more stubborn.I put my hands over my mouth and yelled, "Bring Pirata!" He waved his hand again, and we continued shouting almost two hundred feet away, but luckily I was upwind and he could almost hear me. "Who's Pirata, dear?" Mary asked. "I'll know in a while." Sure enough, as soon as we got home, Pirata came in.I set the voice lock on his little door to his own meow so he can come in and out freely. Pirata is a beautiful big tomcat, half red-haired Persian, half crossbreed.I saw it striding in arrogantly, as if confiding what it thought of me leaving for so long, and then rubbed its head against my ankle to express its forgiveness.I stooped and tousled his fur, and after that he looked at Mary. I look at Mary.She crouched there, proficient in cat language, and greeted it, but Pirata just looked at her suspiciously.Suddenly, it jumped into her arms and started purring like a gas gauge malfunctioning, rubbing against her chin. I breathed a sigh of relief and said, "It's all right now, for a while I thought I couldn't support you anymore." Mary looked up and smiled, "You don't have to worry, I get along very well with cats, two thirds of me are cats." "What about the other third?" She made a face at me, "You'll know." She scratched Pirata's chin, and Pirata craned his neck enjoying it, a smug expression on his face.I noticed that Mary's hair just matched his coat color. "Old John took care of it while I was gone," I explained. "Pirata is mine now, and he'll have it when I'm gone." "I see," said Mary, "and I belong to Pirata now, don't I, Pirata?" The cat didn't make a sound, just continued to snuggle up to her, not at all ashamed.I'm relieved: people who hate cats can't understand what cats mean to cat lovers.But if Mary wasn't in the hut, the cat would annoy me to death. Since then, the cat has been with us or alone with Mary almost all day, except when I shut her bedroom door.Even though Mary and Pirata thought I was petty, I couldn't bear to have it in the bedroom.We even take it with us to canyon shooting practice.I advised Mary to keep it at home, but she said, "Just be careful not to touch it yourself, I won't anyway." I kept silent, feeling a little unconvinced.I'm a good marksman, and I've been practicing at every opportunity, even on my honeymoon.No, not quite, I might have given up practicing if Mary hadn't really liked shooting too.Mary is not only a well-trained shooter, she does have real kung fu and is called a goddess shooter.She tried to teach me, but she couldn't be taught that kind of marksmanship alone. I asked her why she carried more than one gun.She told me, "You're going to need so many guns. Come! Take the guns away from me." I put on a posture of grabbing the gun empty-handed face to face, she easily dodged it, and said sharply: "What are you doing? Do you want to hand over my gun, or invite me to dance? Come on." I had to take it seriously.My marksmanship may not win any medals, but when it comes to close combat, I am a good hand. If she hadn't let go, maybe I would have broken her wrist. I got her gun, and then I felt another gun against my navel.Although it was a women's pistol, it was enough to turn two dozen wives into widows without reloading.I looked down and saw that the safety catch had been released, and my beautiful bride only had to move a muscle to punch a hole in my body. Although the hole was not big, it was enough to kill me. "Where did you hide your gun?" I asked her.Of course I want to make sure that we didn't bother to put on our clothes when we went out. This area is deserted and it's my territory, so naturally we don't need to go through that kind of trouble. I was very surprised. I had just believed that the only gun on Mary's body was the one in her delicate hand. Demure and ladylike, she told me, "The gun sits at the base of my neck, right under my hair, see?" I looked, and I knew a phone could be hidden there, but I never expected a gun.Of course, for one thing I don't use a women's gun, and for another I don't have fiery red shawl curls. I looked down as she put a third gun in my ribs. "Where did this come from?" I asked. She giggled. "It's all about misdirecting other people's attention. I put it in the most conspicuous place all day long." She didn't say any more, and I still didn't want to understand it.Strange!She should have clattered when she walked, but she didn't hear it. I found that I could still teach her some unarmed skills, and my self-esteem was finally restored.In my opinion, bare-handed kung fu is more useful than a gun and can often save your life.It's not that Mary is not good at boxing, every punch and every kick of her can kill people.But she has a bad habit, every time she falls, she will kiss me limply.Once, instead of responding to her kiss, I shook her and told her to be serious.She didn't interrupt my nonsense, her whole body was still soft, and she said in an octave lower voice: "Honey, why don't you understand, my weapon is not this," I know she didn't mean her weapon was a gun, she meant something older and more primitive.True, she could punch and kick like an angry bear, but she wasn't one of those tall, strong, manly women who would never look softly at a pillow.Mary's real strength lay in other talents. This reminds me, from her I learned how I was rescued from the slugs, Mary wandered around the city for days without finding me, but accurately reported the progress of the city being "taken" .If she hadn't had the knack to spot a man possessed by a slug, we'd have lost a lot of agents, and I'd never have been free from my master.With the data she brought back, the old man concentrated his forces at the entrance and exit of the city, and I was rescued, although they didn't wait for me...at least I think so. Maybe they were waiting for me on purpose.Some of Mary's remarks made me think that the old man and she had scoured the city's main transmitters without stopping.Clearly, finding me was at one point the center of the city's work.However, it was wrong to do so. It was impossible for the old man to give up his job in order to find an agent.I must have misunderstood Mary. Mary didn't like to dwell on the past, and I didn't have the opportunity to continue the discussion.Once, I asked her why the old man stopped letting her continue as the President's guard.She simply said, "I can no longer function," without further explanation.She knew I would one day understand: the slug had discovered the mystery of sex, and in doing so she lost her special role of identifying possessed men.But I didn't understand that at the time, and Mary hated the subject and refused to talk about it.Mary is the least troublesome person I know. On holidays away from the world, carefree all day long, we almost forget the enemy we are up against. Although she would not talk about herself, she liked to hear me talk about myself.I am very relaxed and happy, so I really want to explain to her the thing that has always been haunting me.I told him how I didn't make a name for myself everywhere after I got out of the army, and finally I had to swallow my anger and go to work for the old man. I told her, "I don't know what I am anymore. I'm a peaceful man, and the old man is the only man I'm willing to submit to, and I'm still fighting him. Why? Mary, I have Is something wrong?" With my head in her lap, she cupped my head and kissed it. "Honey, why don't you understand? There is really nothing wrong with you, it's just your life experience that made you such a character. " "But I've always been like that." "I know, you've been like this since you were a child. There was no mother's love since you were a child, only a talented and arrogant father who always ordered you, you should do this, you should do that. It made you lose confidence in yourself." I sat up in surprise at what she said.I?Have no confidence in yourself?I said, "Oh, where does that come from? I'm the most pompous, conceited person in the world." "It used to be. It's much better now." She stood up and said, "Let's go watch the sunset." "Sunset?" I answered. "Impossible, we just finished breakfast." But she was right and I was wrong--always. Getting the timing wrong brought me back to reality. "Mary, how long have we been here? What's the date?" "Is there anything important?" "Of course it matters. I'm sure we've been here for more than a week. It won't be long before the phone rings and we'll have to work hard again." "Yes, but what does it matter whether you know the date or not?" She's right, but I still want to know the date.I could have turned on the stereo screen to find out the date, but then I would have seen the news--I didn't want to, I wanted to continue the peaceful world where Mary and I were far away from the world without the Titans. "Mary," I said irritably, "how many time extensions do you have?" "Gone." "Well—I still have enough food for the two of us. Let's extend the time. Even if there are only twenty-four hours left, we can slow down this time and make it a month of subjective time." "no." "Why not? Carpe diem while the good times don't pass." She put her hand on my arm and looked up into my eyes. "No, honey, it's not for me. My approach is: enjoy every moment. Don't waste time worrying about the future." I guess I must have looked stubborn at the time, and she said, "If you want Taking medicine, I don't mind, but I don't take it." "Damn it! I don't want to be happy alone." She didn't answer.There are many ways of gaining the upper hand in an argument, and I find hers the most abominable. We didn't argue.Whenever I started an argument (which I did more than once), Mary always backed down, and it always turned out that I was wrong.Several times, I wanted to know more about her.I married this woman, so I should know something about her. Once, she thought about it and replied: "Sometimes, I don't know if I have had a childhood, or, is the childhood I remember a dream of mine last night?" I straight up asked her what her name was. "Mary," she said quietly. "So, is Mary really your name?" I had told her my real name, but we continued to use the name "Sam." "Of course my name is Mary, dear. I've been called Mary since you first called me." "Yes, your name is Mary. You are my dear Mary. What is your name, please?" There was a strange, hurt look in her eyes, but her voice was calm: "I used to be 'Erlyukor.'" "'Erlyukor,'" I repeated, savoring the name, "Irlyukor, what a strange and beautiful name. Ellyukor, a good name, my dear Ellyukor Cole." "My name is Mary now." That's it. At some point, I came to the conclusion that Mary had been hurt before, badly.But it is unlikely that I will know that from her mouth.她以前结过婚，这一点我相当确定，也许伤害她的就是从前的婚姻。 但眼下，我不再理会这件事了。玛丽就是玛丽，不论过去、现在，还是永远，她在我身边，让我沐浴在她的温暖中。我觉得心满意足。“岁月和陈腐的世俗都无法夺去她无尽的活力①。” 【① 莎士比亚：《安东尼和克娄帕特拉》。 】 既然她喜欢这个名字，我就继续叫她“玛丽”，反正我一想到她，就是玛丽。然而她以前用过的名字一直回响在我的脑海里。爱尔柳科尔……爱尔柳科尔……这个名字在我的唇边徘徊，不知道应该怎么拼写。 猛然间，我知道怎么拼了。我那讨厌的总爱储存琐碎事情的记忆已经找到了正确的检索标签，此时正在我大脑深处拼命翻找我储存在那儿的一些连续多年不去考虑的垃圾信息。曾有一个社区，一个殖民地、那儿使用人造的语言，就连名字也是人造的—— 对了，是惠特曼人。这是一群无政府主义信徒，因为反对政府而被加拿大当局驱逐出境，他们前往小亚美利加，但在那儿也没有站住脚。他们的先知写了一本书，叫《幸福熵》。我虽未细读，却草草浏览过一遍，书中充斥着装模作样的数学公式。教导人们如何获得幸福。 人人都希望“幸福”，正如人人都反对“罪恶”一样。但这个教派的做法却与众不同，总是给他们惹上大麻烦。他们有一种新奇而又相当古老的解决性问题的办法，这种方法看来挺适合他们，但只要这种惠特曼文化接触到其他类型的文化，都会引起爆炸性的大冲突。对他们而言，就连小亚美利加也不够远离他人。我不知从哪儿听说，这一教派的残余者已经移民去了金星。估计现在全都死了。 我不再想这些事了。如果玛丽真是惠特曼人，或是以这种方式被抚养成人的话，那是她的事。我当然不会让这一教派的思想引起我们夫妻之间的矛盾。婚姻不是谁对谁拥有所有权，妻子也不是财产。 如果玛丽不愿我知道她的这段往事，那我就不知道好了。我追求的是玛丽，不是什么密封包装里的童贞。