Chapter 60 Chapter 58 ends

I was really startled, and screamed in terror; I was so frightened that the scream was just a short, breathless wail. "I'm sorry!" Jared put his arm on my shoulder and said comfortingly, "I'm sorry I didn't expect to scare you." "What are you doing here?" I asked him breathlessly. "Follow you, I'll follow you all night long." "So, stop now." In the darkness, he hesitated for a while without moving his arm.I bent down to free his arm, but he grabbed my wrist.He gripped so hard that I couldn't get away easily. "Are you going to see a doctor?" he asked, unequivocally.Obviously, he wasn't talking about a pleasant visit.

"Of course." I said through clenched teeth so that he couldn't hear the panic in my voice. "After what happened today, do I have any other options? Things won't get better this way, and it's not Jeb can make a decision." "I know, I'm on your side." The fact that these words still had the power to hurt me and make my eyes sting with tears made me resentful.I tried to think of Ian—he was the anchor, in a way Kyle was to Sunny—but with Jared's hand in my hand and his breath coming in, it was hard to think of Ian. Yep.As if the whole percussion ensemble couldn't tell a violin piece apart when the gongs and drums were pounding "Then let me go, Jared. You go away, I want to be alone." I said fiercely, boldly, forcefully These words, it is easy to hear that these are not lies.

"I should go with you." "You'll have Melanie back soon," I snapped. "I just want a few minutes, Jared, just give me that time!" There was a pause again, his hand did not let go. "Xiao Man, I want to come and accompany you." Tears were falling, I was glad I was in the dark. "It's not going to feel like that," I whispered, "so there's no need." Of course Jared couldn't be allowed to stay there, only the doctor can be trusted, only he has given me a promise, and I'm not leaving this planet.I don't intend to live on the Planet of Dolphins or the Planet of Flowers, where I'm always grieving for the loved ones I've left behind, and when I open my eyes again, they're all dead—if I had eyes.This is my planet and they can't let me go.I'll be left in the dust, in the dark cave, with my friends.A man's grave, bury the man I've become.

"But Xiaoman, I have so many things I want to tell you." "I don't need your gratitude, Jared, trust me." "What exactly do you want?" he whispered, his voice tense and choked. "I'll give you anything." "Take care of my family and don't let other people kill them." "I'll definitely take care of them." He dismissed my request recklessly. "I mean you, what can I give you?" "I can take nothing with me, Jared." "Not even memories, Man? What do you want?" I wiped away the tears with my free hand, but it was useless, and fresh tears welled up immediately.No, I can't even take the memories with me.

"What can I give you, Xiaoman?" He insisted. I took a deep breath, trying to keep my voice steady. "Give me a lie, Jared. Tell me you want me to stay." This time without hesitation, he wrapped his arms around me and pressed me against his chest.He put his lips to my forehead, and I could feel his breath brushing my hair as he spoke. The Melanie in my head held her breath.She is trying to avoid it again, trying to give me my freedom in these last few minutes, maybe she is afraid of hearing these lies.She won't like the memory when I'm gone. "Stay here, Man, with us, with me. I don't want you to go, please. I can't imagine without you, I can't imagine. I don't know how" he said no down.

He's good at telling lies, and he must be pretty sure I'll tell them. I leaned against him for a while, but I could feel the time fly by.The time is up, the time is up. "Thank you." I whispered, trying to break free from his arms. His arms hugged tighter: "I haven't finished yet." Our faces were inches apart, he shortened the distance, and even now, in my last hours on this planet, I couldn't help but respond to him, gasoline met open flame - and we were ablaze again. But, it feels different, I can feel it, this time for, me.When he hugged this body, he called me by my name—he treated this body as my body, as it was me, and I could feel the difference.For a split second it was just the two of us, just the Rover and Jared, and we were all burning.

No one has told a more moving lie than Jared has used his body to tell me in the last few minutes, and for that I am infinitely grateful.I can take this lie with me because I'm not going anywhere, but this lie takes away some of the pain of parting, and I can believe this lie.I can believe that he will miss me so much that missing will take away some of his happiness.I shouldn't expect that, but after all, it's always easier to believe a lie. I can't ignore the time, every minute ticks away like a countdown.Even when the passion was burning, I could feel the time dragging me, sucking me into the dark hallway, taking me away from all this flame and passion.

I force my lips away and we pant in the dark, our breath warming each other's cheeks. "Thank you." I thanked again. "etc" "I can't, I can't take it anymore, can I?" "Okay." He said softly. "I want one more thing, let me do it alone, please." "If if you're sure that's what you want" His voice trailed off, skeptical. "This is what I need, Jared." "Then I'll stay here," he said hoarsely. "After it's over, I'll have the doctor call you." His arms are still around me.

"You know, I let you do this, Ian almost killed me, maybe I should let him kill me. And Jamie, he'll never forgive either of us." "Now I dare not think about them, please, let me go." Jared let go slowly, the apparent reluctance warming the cold void in the center of my body. "I love you, Xiaoman." I sighed, "Thanks, Jared. You know how much I love you with all my heart." Heart and soul, to me, are not the same thing.I've been split too long T.It's time to restore something, to make a person whole, even if it excludes me. The passing seconds pulled me towards the finish line, and when he stopped holding me, I felt cold.The cold intensified with every step I took from him.

Of course, this is just my imagination, it is still summer here.For me, it's always summer here. "What's it like here when it rains, Jared?" I whispered. "Where do you all sleep?" He thought for a moment before answering, and I could hear the choke in his voice: "We," he swallowed, "we all moved to the rec room, where we all slept together." I nodded in my heart, wondering what the atmosphere was like at that time.Would it be embarrassing if all the conflicting people slept together?Or is it funny?a change?Like a pajama party? "What's wrong?" he asked in a low voice.

"I just want to imagine having me involved, and it brings me joy." fraud. "Wait for Xiaoman" at that time. "Life and love go on, even without" Goodbye, Jared, Mel said she'd see you soon I ran into the tunnel, far away from him, lest he talk me out of it with those grateful lies, I There is only silence behind. His pain doesn't bother me the way Ian's does.For Jared, the pain will pass quickly.Happiness is near, happy ending. The tunnel to the south felt only a few yards long, and I saw brightly lit lanterns ahead, and the doctor was waiting for me. I went into the room that I had always been afraid of, and the doctor had everything ready.In the darkest corner, I saw two beds joined together, Kyle snoring, one arm hooked around Jody's motionless body, his other arm still holding Sunny's freezer. .She would love that, if only there were some way to tell her. "Hey doctor." I whispered. He looked away from the table, where the medicines were being placed just now, and tears had already flowed down his face. Suddenly, I was fearless.The heart rate stabilized, the breathing became deeper and more relaxed, and the hardest part was over. I have done this many times.Before, I would always close my eyes and walk away, knowing a new pair of eyes would open.I am still so convinced that this incident is familiar and nothing to be afraid of. I walked to the operating table, jumped on it, and sat on it.I pick up the painkiller with firm hands and unscrew the cap.I put the small square flakes on my tongue and wait for it to dissolve. No difference, at this point, I no longer feel pain - physical pain. "Doctor, tell me something, what's your real name?" I want to answer all my little doubts before the end comes. The doctor sniffed and wiped under his eyes with the back of his hand. "Eustace, that's the last name. My parents were two of the most brutal human beings." I smiled and sighed again. "Jared wait, he's behind the big cave. I promised him you'd tell him when it was over. Just wait until I—wait until I don't move, okay?" By then, it was too late to decide what he was going to do to stop me." "I don't want to have this operation, Xiaoman." "I understand, thank you, Doctor, but I want you to keep your word." "I beg you!" "No, you promised me. I did what I promised, didn't I?" "you did it." "Then it's your turn, let me stay with Walter and Wes." He tried to hold back the tears, and his thin face convulsed. "Will you be in pain?" "No, doctor," I lied, "I won't feel anything." I was expecting a blissful feeling, waiting for the painkillers to relax my nerves like last time, but again it didn't feel any different.This must not be a painkiller at all - people just blindly believe in it, I sigh again. I lay face down on the operating table, stretched out, and turned my face towards him. "Doctor, anesthetize me." The bottle was opened and I heard him shake the bottle and pour the anesthetic onto the gauze in his hand. "You are the noblest, purest creature I have ever seen. The universe would be eclipsed without you," he whispered. These are his words for my tombstone, my epitaph, and it is a pleasure to hear him say them. Thank you, Xiaoman.My sister, I will never forget you. Have fun, Mel.Enjoy life and live gratefully for me. I will.She assured me. goodbye.We said together. The doctor gently covered the gauze on my face with his hands.I took a deep breath, not caring about the strong, pungent smell.I took another breath, and at this moment, I saw the three stars again.They are not calling me, they are letting me go, leaving me in the dark universe, the universe in which I have traveled so many times in my life.I melted into the darkness, and the sky grew brighter.It wasn't black at all, it was azure.Warm, lively, brilliant blue—I float toward it without fear.