Chapter 47 Chapter nine

Saul temporarily put aside the book he was currently working on—an analysis of Kierkegaard's theory of ethics, moral compromise, and its application to the legislative mechanism of the hegemony—and devoted himself to collecting books on time, Heber Leon and lesser-known data on the history of Abraham. The unremarkable work continued, and several months passed, and the collection of information could not meet his operational needs at all.He occasionally vented his frustration on the stream of medical and scientific experts who came to examine Rachel like a flood of tourists to the temple.

"How could this happen!" he yelled at a squat melon-like specialist who had erred in his attitude towards the patient's father, who was both self-righteous and condescending.The doctor has thinning hair and a face that looks like a billiard ball with lines drawn all over it. "Her body is already getting smaller!" Thor yelled, tugging at the collar of the retreating expert. "It's not just the appearance that everyone can see, even the bone mass is gradually decreasing. How could she turn back into a child every day? Isn't this in conflict with the law of conservation of mass?"

The specialist's lips moved, but Saul shook him too hard for him to speak.A colleague with a mustache answered for him. "Mr. Winterburo," he said, "sir. You must understand that your daughter is in a... um... say local anti-entropic zone." Saul turned to his mustache colleague. "You mean she's just stuck in a backwards bubble?" "Ah...no," said the colleague, rubbing his chin nervously, "maybe I should give you a better analogy... at least biological...life, the metabolic mechanism is all gone... ah... " "Pure bullshit," Thor snapped. "She's neither secreting nutrients nor spitting out food. What about all the neural activity? Reversing the electrochemical impulses is bullshit. Her The brain is still active, gentlemen...she's just losing her memory. Why, gentlemen? Why?"

The experts finally spoke up. "We don't know why, Mr. Winterberg. Mathematically, your daughter's body is like a time-reversal equation...or an object passing through a rapidly spinning black hole. We don't know exactly how this could happen Yes, and don't know why something physically impossible is happening to your daughter, Mr Winterbur. We don't know enough." Saul shook hands with each of them. "Good. That's all I want to know, gentlemen. Have a nice trip back." On her twenty-first birthday, an hour after the family had gone to bed, Rachel came to Sol's door. "dad?"

"What is it, child?" Thor put on his robe and came to the door to stand beside her. "Can't sleep?" "I haven't slept in two days," she said softly, "doing my best so I can finish listening to the briefing material I recorded in the Wanna Know?" file." Sol nodded. "Dad, would you come downstairs and have a drink with me? I want to tell you something." Sol picked up his glasses from the bedside table and went downstairs with her. In fact, this was the first and last time Saul had a drink with his daughter.It wasn't hilarious - they chatted for a while, then cracked jokes and punchlines, until at the end they were both too full of laughter to continue.Rachel started a new story, only taking two sips at the funniest moments, so nearly spit the whiskey out of her nose, laughing so hard.They both felt that this was the happiest moment of their lives.

"I'll get another bottle," Saul said, holding back his tears. "Director Moore gave me some Scotch whiskey last Christmas . . . it seems to be." He tiptoed back to find Rachel sitting on the couch running her fingers through her hair.He poured a little for her, and they drank in silence for a while. "dad?" "Ok?" "I went through the whole process. Seeing myself, listening to my own voice, and seeing the middle-aged holograms of Li Na and others..." "Not yet middle-aged," Saul said, "Li Na will only be thirty-five next month..."

"Well, it's getting old anyway, you know what I mean, anyway, I've read the medical report and seen those photos on Hyperion, you know what I think?" "What do you think?" "I don't believe any of this, Dad." Thor put down his glass and looked at his daughter.Her face was rounder and less sophisticated than before.more beautiful. "I mean, I actually believe that," she said, with a low, but terrified laugh, "that people like you and Mama couldn't play such cruel jokes on me. Plus About your...your age...and the news, and everything else. I know it's totally true, but I just can't believe it. Do you know what I mean, Dad?"

"Understood," Saul replied. "I mean, I woke up this morning and I thought, awesome...there's a paleontology test tomorrow, and I haven't even studied it. I'm looking forward to doing a bit or two in front of Roger Sherman... ...he always thought he was smart." Sol took another sip. "Roger died three years ago in a plane crash south of Barsad," he said.He wouldn't have said this if he hadn't been in the guts, but he had to figure out if there was another Rachel hiding inside this Rachel. "I know," Rachel said, her chin resting on her knees, "I've read about everyone I've ever known. Grandma's dead. Professor Eckard doesn't teach anymore. Nikki's married, with a… …salesman. So much has happened in four years.”

"Actually, it's been more than eleven years," Thor said. "Going to and from Hyperion puts your time behind those of us who stay at home by six years." "But that's normal," Rachel exclaimed, "people are traveling off-net all the time. They have to deal with that too." Thor's jaw. "But it's different from your situation, child." Rachel forced a smile and drained her whiskey. "Man, this is exaggerated." She put the glass down with a heavy, high-pitched thud. "Look, that's my decision. I've spent two and a half days figuring all of this out, and she...I...wanted me to understand what happened, what the reality is...but, there's no use!"

Saul sat motionless, not daring to breathe. "I mean," Rachel said, "I know I'm getting younger every day, losing memories of people I've never met...I mean, and then what happens? I'm going to keep it that way , getting younger, getting smaller, and fading, and finally one day, I disappear? God, Dad." Rachel wrapped her arms tightly around her knees. "It's a weirdly funny story, isn't it?" "It's not funny at all," Saul said quietly. "Yeah, I know it's not funny, too," Rachel said.Her eyes, still big and dark, were now filled with tears. "This must be the worst nightmare in the world for you and mommy. Every day you have to watch me go down the stairs...infinite confusion...waking up with only yesterday's memory but my own voice clearly Tell me that yesterday was many years ago. I was in love with a young man named Milio..."

"It's Merio," Thor said softly. "Whoever it is. Those tapes are totally useless, Dad. By the time I'm willing to accept that, I'm so tired that I have to go to bed. And then...you know what happens next." "You wish..." Thor began, but cleared his throat immediately. "What do you wish we could do, boy?" Rachel looked into his eyes and smiled.She had been giving him that sweet smile since she was fifteen weeks old. "Don't make me listen to this anymore, Dad," she said firmly. "Don't make me listen to what I say. It just makes me miserable. I mean, I never lived through those times." She He paused, touching his forehead. "You know what I mean, Dad. A Rachel who goes to another planet, falls in love, gets hurt...that's a whole other Rachel! It's not my job to suffer her." She start crying. "Do you understand? Do you understand?" "I understand," Saul said.He opened his arms to her, feeling his daughter's warmth and tears on his chest. "Yes, I understand." In the second year, there were super-light news from Hyperion from time to time, but it was not good news.No progress has been made on the nature and origin of the antientropy field.No unusual time-tidal activity has been detected near the Sphinx either.In and around the tidal zone, they experimented with live animals, some of which died suddenly, but none of them developed Merlin's disease.Every message from Merio ends with "Send some love to Rachel." Saul and Sarai took out loans from Imperial University and went to Barsad City for limited Paulson therapy.They were too old for even Paulson's treatment to extend their lifespan by another century, but physiotherapy brought the seventy-year-old couple back to their fifty-year-old appearance.They pored over dusty family photos and figured they'd have no trouble going back to the clothes they were fifteen years ago. Sixteen-year-old Rachel bounced down the stairs, the comlog tuned to the university radio station. "Can I have some good cereal?" "Don't you eat it every morning?" Sarai smiled. "Yeah," Rachel smiled, "I just thought we might be going out or something. I heard the phone ring. Is that Nikki?" "No," Saul said. "Damn it," Rachel said, looking at them, "I'm sorry. But she promised me to call me as soon as the standard grades came in. It's been three weeks since the tutoring session. You must think I What did you hear?" "Don't worry," Salai said.She put the coffee pot on the table and poured a cup for Rachel and another for herself. "Don't worry, honey. I'm sure your grades will be good enough to go to any school you want."