Chapter 125 My Literary Youth Career
At the beginning of 1996, I put a large envelope into the mailbox, and then I used my fingers to probe the opening of the envelope to see if it fell in.The address on the envelope was "Magazine Office No. 675, Julu Road, Shanghai", and inside was a historical essay of mine: "Nowhere to Take: Wu Sangui".
Fifteen years have passed, and to this day, I have not heard back from the magazine.However, my "literary career within the system" can indeed be counted from the day of the first submission.
Only those who have experienced the 1980s can understand what the word "writer" meant in that era. It was an era when everyone read literary journals.When a novel is published in a well-known literary journal, it is known and talked about by the whole country.It was a time when writers were social spiritual guides. It is believed that the writer is the conscience of society, the embodiment of justice, and the proclaimer of the future.At that time, writing could completely change a person's destiny, and publishing a novel that attracted attention could turn a person from the bottom of society into the focus of national discussion overnight.If a person has a collection of poems and claims to love literature, he can travel the world (to paraphrase Gao Xiaosong's words, "People at that time believed that children who played the piano were good children", and people believed that children who could write poems were even better children), and people's hearts are as white as white. The lotus has just bloomed. I grew up in such an atmosphere, and I live in Chaoyang City, Liaoning Province, which is an ancient frontier city with a particularly simple respect for culture and literature.Last year, I went back to Chaoyang to handle my mother's medical reimbursement (my mother retired in Chaoyang City).The cousin-in-law who accompanied me was very clever and told the staff that he is a writer!As he spoke, he took out a book I just gave him. Immediately, the whole office was in a commotion, everyone stood up and rushed to pass the book around.The section chief brought me a chair and asked me to sit down, and another person handed me hot water.People treat it like a big man who comes to inspect.All the way to the green light, everything will be done soon. In an era when "writers" are so devalued, this place still maintains such a simple respect for words, so one can imagine how grand this respect would be twenty years ago! People in the ancient city think that reading must be a good thing.No one taught himself to love reading, but books were almost the only entertainment besides games as a child.When I was in junior high school, I applied for a library card in the Chaoyang City Library and the Municipal Government Library.I had no choice but to borrow "masterpieces", of course, those that I could barely understand.What,,, "Vanity Fair"... I remember traveling to Beidaihe one summer, I sat in the first row of the bus, holding a thick book in my hand, and was angry all the way because I couldn't understand it. From the perspective of a junior high school student, this is the cultural landscape when I was growing up.On the one hand, we don't have many books to read. On the other hand, the books that hit our hands are generally of a hard quality, which makes every reader a drill.The vocabulary of shallow reading, light reading, and soft reading had not yet appeared at that time. More literary edification occurred in the early 1990s when I was in college. After all, there are more books in the university library.Wang Anyi, Han Shaogong, Mo Yan, Han Dong, Wang Shuo, one after another.Re-reading what you didn't read in high school, and being obsessed with Tolstoy and Dostoyevsky since then... You can't help being a literary youth after going through this.
But before I started working, I didn't really think about being a writer.In the university, I devoted a lot of spare time to calligraphy and seal cutting, and joined the calligraphy association of the university.In addition to the fact that the word "writer" is too lofty in my mind, it is also because I somehow think that being a writer is something that at least needs to be established and experienced before you can try it (this impression may be formed because it was popular in the 1980s. Most of the momentary writers were educated youths of a certain age). The start of writing happened after working for a year.The motivation for writing is fairly simple: boredom.After graduating from university, I originally wanted to work hard, first "mixed" (in my dad's words, it was "boiled") to the rank of deputy director, could use public funds to treat guests to dinner, and have status and face in a small city. A universal ideal of someone who grew up in a small northern town.But after graduating from university in 1994 and working in the Construction Bank of Huludao City, I found that "mixing" and "boiling" were quite difficult things for me: a week's work can basically be dealt with in a day or two .Most of the rest of the time is mainly spent playing poker.At that time, the state-owned banks had not carried out shareholding reform, and the working atmosphere was similar to that of government agencies.I remember that for quite a while, shortly after going to work every day, a few of us in Corey used newspaper to paste the glass beams on the door, arched pigs and fried golden flowers in it, and a dozen of them lasted a whole day. Although this kind of life is comfortable, but after a long time, it will feel empty and boring.What better way to pass the time?I can't write brush characters or draw pictures in my work unit.So, write something. I remembered that I seemed to have a little "literary genius": when I was in the fifth grade of elementary school, my composition was once used as a model essay by the teacher.Tolstoy said that the most important thing to be a writer is to have a strong vanity. Fortunately, this quality, I also have. What to write?Anything goes, as long as it's not mediocre.You know, I grew up loving to make myself different.I have been reading every "Xinhua Digest" I can get my hands on since junior high school. The more long articles I can't understand, the more I read them.In the summer vacation of the second year of junior high school, I borrowed the book and read it for ten mornings in the park. Of course, I still didn’t understand it in the end.Since childhood, as long as there are words, whether it is astronomy, geography, medicine, agriculture, biology, natural science, superstition or even a calendar, I can read it with relish.During my four years in college, I basically stayed in the Dalian library. I read the most history books, and the North Korean Illustrated which introduced the happy life of the Korean people.So as of now, there are too many strange things in my stomach.Although the word "Yu Qiuyu" has broken the market today, I never deny that the so-called "cultural prose" writing method made me suddenly enlightened.This kind of swaying narrative style just mixed up the mess in my stomach and pulled out my brain. In half a year, I wrote several long essays such as "Boundless Mongolia" and "Nowhere to Take Shelter: Wu Sangui".Among them, my favorite is "Nowhere to Shelter: Wu Sangui". I became interested in Wu Sangui because I read a very thin book "Rebel Wu Sangui". I found that this severely facialized person was actually famous for his "filial piety and bravery" when he was young.Young Wu Sangui was a handsome man, he was polite when he got off the horse, and he was very brave when he got on the horse, which was quite praised by the people of the time.From the highest point of morality to rebellion and rebellion to capture the "old master" in order to serve the new master, what kind of spiritual earthquake and soul tearing did he experience?I also bought another book "Research on San Francisco in the Qing Dynasty" written by Professor Liu Fengyun, and found all the materials related to Wu Sangui and that era that I could find at that time. Like a snail, the spiritual process of taking off the moral mask layer by layer. In terms of style, it is not a donkey or a horse, it is not pure prose, nor can it be called a novel.It is a hybrid of narrative and thinking, a monster of alloy body.Later, critics defined this kind of thing as "cross-style writing".Someone later said: "Zhang Hongjie's writing is to a certain extent a typical cross-genre writing, mixed with a lot of novel style, historical reportage style, and even psychoanalytic style of writing." I am quite satisfied with this article, and think that I can start the second required action for literary youth: submitting a manuscript.
To become a "writer" at that time, one had to submit articles to literary magazines.Literary magazines are a single-plank bridge leading to the literary world.The Internet was just emerging at that time, and the term Internet literature had not yet appeared.Every "literary youth" must first "show his face" in literary journals.The general way is to first "emerge" in "provincial and municipal" literary journals, and then attract attention in "national journals".In this way, you have the opportunity to participate in various literary activities such as PEN gatherings, and you are eligible to join the city, province, and even the Chinese Writers Association.Your next goal is to be recognized by some well-known critics and literary authorities, and to win some "provincial" or even "national" literary awards, so that you will get an "official position" in the Writers Association system, such as a certain Chairman of the City Writers Association, Vice Chairman of a Provincial Writers Association.In this way, even if you are successful and famous, you can be called a "well-known writer", and you are eligible to attend honorary conferences such as the "National Congress of the Chinese Writers Association" or the "National Youth Writers' Creation Conference", and enjoy free travel abroad organized by writers associations at all levels. activities like this.This was the writer's path of a normal literary youth at that time. At that time, people never dreamed that ten years later, there would be many people, such as Mingyue, who just posted their words on the Internet, and they might be followed by the majority of netizens and become popular domestic best-selling authors.What's more unexpected is that a young Han Han actually rejected the invitation to join the Writers Association. In other words, when I started writing, the editors of literary magazines, literary critics, and literary authorities were the three gates on the road to the success of a literary youth, and you had to overcome them one by one.The first thing to do, of course, is to knock on the door of the literary magazine.As part of the literary system, until today, every province in the country has at least one "pure literature periodical".According to the standards in the "literary circle", literary periodicals can be roughly divided into two levels.The first level is "provincial level", such as Liaoning's "Yalu River" and Heilongjiang's "Northern Literature". These publications have relatively limited influence. In other words, they can be called second-rate literary journals.The other level is "national level", which also includes some influential local publications.Generally speaking, "Contemporary", "October", "Everyone", "Zhongshan", "The End of the World", "People's Literature", "Flower City", "Writer"... The number one recognized by everyone, of course. Unlike ordinary literary youths who first submit to "provincial periodicals", I submitted the article "Nowhere to Take" for the first time. I am determined to use this work as the opening shot, blasting away my "writer" road.Compared with other "cultural essays" in literary journals at that time, I think this article is by no means inferior.I am somehow convinced that it will be well received by the editors.After the manuscript was sent away, I kept imagining the fate of this big envelope in Harvest Magazine.I imagined that one morning, an editor casually opened the envelope with a yawn, read a few paragraphs, sat up straight, read a few more pages, slapped the table, yelled, and called out to the other editors Come and see... I fantasize that this work will let the Chinese literary world know that there is a 24-year-old "young writer" named Zhang Hongjie, who is better at describing human nature in history than Yu Qiuyu... I fantasize that the trajectory of my life will be from now on. change.Receiving manuscript fees, participating in various pen meetings, admiring eyes from colleagues, escaping from this boring job... Changing destiny through writing is a common legend in that era. Half a month after I voted, I often went to the communication room of the unit.But until the beginning of the third month, there was still no reply.Although I have never submitted a manuscript, I have read literary magazines for many years, and I have a lot of common knowledge about literature.I know that the review period for literary journals is three months.
I wasn't discouraged in the slightest.Although I let go of my fantasy, I actually fully anticipated the difficulties on the road to writing from the very beginning: I regarded it as a heroic career that tested a person's will and ability, and a heroic career is unlikely to be smooth sailing.I have read many biographies of writers, and I am very impressed by the stories of writers whose submissions were repeatedly rejected.In particular, the arduous and dramatic struggle career in the film often makes me excited.The first time I submitted a manuscript, I submitted it to the best journal in my mind. In fact, it was more out of a try-and-see mentality.It doesn't matter if there is no response, there are still many first-class literary magazines. So I printed another copy and sent it to Contemporary. Three months later, I sent it to October again. After that, I learned the lesson: I started multiple submissions.I submitted to three journals at the same time, and I was ready to notify the other two immediately after receiving a manuscript letter from one. But within a year, I didn't even see what a rejection letter looked like: all the magazines didn't hear anything back. I began to wonder, like Jack London, whether there were living editors down the post. More often, I doubt whether I have the talent for writing.However, I did serve as a Chinese class representative in junior high school! People born in the Mao era were a little bit unwilling to admit defeat.I made up my mind: I will use three years to get through the path of writing.In the past three years, I will write 300,000 words.If the 300,000 words cannot be published, then it can be confirmed that I have no writing talent, and I will give up this matter forever.
One day not long after I made up my mind, I once again came to the reception room of my unit anxiously. I was terrified of my colleagues knowing that I was being rejected, and I didn't even let anyone know I had submitted it.Therefore, I take the initiative to pick up the newspapers and magazines ordered by the department. A medium-sized envelope was sandwiched among a pile of newspapers and magazines, with the words "Everybody Magazine" clearly written on it.My heart started pounding. There was no one in the office at noon, so I tore open the envelope, and inside was a flying script: "Mr. Zhang Hongjie: Your "Nowhere to Take" is wonderful! Accurate, strong, and full. The editorial department unanimously agrees to ask you for a draft, because "Everyone" will devote itself to launching a real but also more For literature, a more marginalized writing direction. "Nowhere to Shelter" is a bit too 'real', if it can be more personal, it can be published in "Everybody". Zhu Xiaohua." You can imagine my excitement.I was finally convinced that "literary career" was what I imagined it to be.There is such a group of dedicated people who are manipulating the soul or heart of mankind."Everyone" at that time Not long after the publication was founded, the upward momentum is very strong, and it is very stylish, with a large format, and the black cover with the portraits of previous Nobel Prize winners is very majestic.I have read Zhu Xiaohua's handsome letter many times, and I imagine that he must be a young man with long hair.I started to revise "Nowhere to Shelter" that night, moving closer to the "personal" style that I understand.Although it is not so sleepless at night, during the day my brain is like the brain in love, always thinking of the lover's face, always turning "Everyone" That black cover.After half a month, I sent the manuscript back, and then I just counted the days and waited. Two years of writing, and finally a "dream come true".Being able to publish your "first work" in a prestigious magazine like "Everyone" should be considered a beautiful beginning, right?Maybe in a few days, I will go to the "spring city" Kunming to hold a pen meeting. Three months later, the second letter came, and I eagerly opened it, but it was full of cold water: "Your "Nowhere to Take" failed to pass the review, saying that it will not publish historical themes for the time being. You are responsible for your own profits and losses, and you have to think more about how to go to the market. Many manuscripts that were originally selected have been suppressed, and you can think of ways elsewhere.”
I once made up my mind to publish my first novel in a first-class journal, and I would become a blockbuster and become famous in one fell swoop.There's only one thing I hate the most: mediocrity.However, after "Everybody" rejected the manuscript, I had to learn from the pain and had to make a major setback: In addition to my favorite manuscript "Nowhere to Take: Wu Sangui", I submitted other manuscripts such as "Boundless Mongolia" to the provincial government. High-level literary publication: I want to step into the "literary circle" first. The first thing that comes to mind is of course the "Yalu River" in Liaoning Province. Although not many people today may know that there is such a publication, it was once brilliant in the 1980s. The standard has been reduced by one file, and it seems to be smooth all the way: after more than a month, I received "Yalu River" An editor named Li Qingqing responded enthusiastically, and then, in the second issue of "Yalu River" in 1998 My "Boundless Mongolia" was published, so this article became my "first work". Since then, I have become friends with the poet Li Qingqing.Through correspondence with her, I discovered that it turned out that it was a small probability event that I was able to publish a work in such a provincial literary journal.She said that when she discovered my work, she had just been seconded to Yalu River as an editor from another unit. Most editors don't like to read unsolicited manuscripts, because more than 95% of them are unreasonable works.Only a novice like her is still interested in looking through it.She accidentally picked my envelope among the piles of natural contributions. Until then, I didn't know that there is such a thing as "natural contribution".In other words, most of the articles published in literary journals are not manuscripts that directly write "Accepted by XX Editorial Department" like I did.You must at least write the name of a specific editor, so that it is more likely to be disassembled and viewed.A more reliable approach is to try to get to know the editor first.At the very least, there must be an introduction from a friend first.Otherwise, your chances of "success" will be much lower.Generally speaking, the "natural contributions" published by a journal may only account for one-fifth to one-tenth. I was surprised.The "literary world" as I know it is not like this.In my mind, the "literary world" really means "higher than life". It should be a group of unworldly people operating according to unworldly rules.I've always believed that writers should be "natural submissions" from the start, and editors should treat all manuscripts equally.The existence of this "literary world", or in other words, the existence of such a group of people who resist the world, makes this world worth living.So this fact shocked me a lot and left me dazed for a long time.I think back to the days and nights I waited for the editors to reply, and now I realize that maybe the envelope I sent out has not been opened yet. However, this knowledge has no effect on me.After that, until today, under normal circumstances, I still insist on "spontaneous submission" (although I basically don't contribute today).The reason for this is because I thought it was "right" and it was part of my boyhood dream.Of course, as before, until today, more than 95% of my "spontaneous submissions" have received no response. This reflects some kind of "mental disease" in my personality, which I can't cure.
The publication of "Boundless Mongolia" marked that I "embarked on the road of literature"."Youth Literature", which can be regarded as a "national publication", also accepted my "natural contributions" and published my first and so far only novel "Speaking of Words". I still remember the editor who wrote back to me Called Chen Kun.Later, "Selected Essays" selected my essays on "Yalu River".Being selected is also a form of recognition.I have published some works in provincial literary journals one after another.Then, I was "discovered" by the Provincial Writers' Association and participated in the "Young Writers Training Class" of the Provincial College of Literature.After that, I became a "Provincial Literary Academy Contract Producer".This is a common practice of "encouraging literary creation" in various provinces: the Provincial Writers Association selects more than a dozen young and middle-aged writers who are the most powerful and able to produce "results" in the province, and sign contracts with them. A certain allowance will be given for the number of publications in "national" publications and the number of reprints.In the literary world of a province, this is considered a relatively important recognition.In other words, I am indeed a "young writer". However, I still haven't been able to get "Nowhere to Take" published in a "top" publication.This is a knot in my heart.I have never given up trying.This manuscript has not stopped running around on the mail road all day.Another editor echoed me back.Shortly after "Everybody" rejected the manuscript, an editor named Wen Neng of "Flower City" sent me a letter of acceptance.This letter clearly states that it will be published next year. At the end of the year, Wen Neng's second letter came: "Your manuscript has been confirmed to be published, but due to personal reasons, I will be transferred from the magazine. In addition, the internal relationship of the magazine is complicated, so this manuscript cannot be used. .I have already recommended it to other publications, please believe that this is a good work and it will definitely be published." A few months later, a letter from Li Shaojun in "The End of the World" proved that Mr. Wen Neng was indeed trying to help me: "Wen Neng turned over your article about Wu Sangui. We read it and thought it was very good. It can be published in Tianya, but it’s too long. Your skills and writing skills are good. If you have any other manuscripts, you can send them. You can send this one to see, they should be able to publish it.” ... Until 2001, the summer of the second year after I had published my first collection of essays, I went to the Liaoning Academy of Literature for a meeting.I had almost forgotten that a manuscript was still floating on the road, until a staff member of the Faculty of Arts threw a frayed brown paper envelope to me: "Please treat me! For your magazine, send it here coming." It was the first issue of "Zhong Shan" in 2001, and in the catalog column it was impressively written: ""Nowhere to Take", Zhang Hongjie".Because I was already a "Contract Producer of Liaoning Literature Institute" at that time, the magazine was sent here inexplicably.There was also a letter in the magazine, and the editor-in-chief Fu Xiaohong said that Wen Neng had forwarded the manuscript to her. This article has been running on the road non-stop for five years. In the past five years, I have changed from twenty-four years old to nearly thirty years old. , finally, in the end, in a "first-class publication" appeared.I am finally worthy of it. (As of today, I have not seen Mr. Wen Neng, not even a phone call. I don’t know where he is working now, or has retired.) I opened the magazine and read this "Nowhere to Take" from the beginning to the end. Read it again word for word.I remember a lot of good things I read in "Zhongshan" when I was in college: Su Tong, Yu Hua, Jia Pingwa, Wang Zengqi... Now, I have a vague feeling of standing side by side with them, my former literary heroes.
Before that, although I had published many things, I never found the feeling of being a "writer".In my memory, a real writer has a large number of readers and will receive rave reviews.Look at the interviews of those famous writers, don’t they all say that after a certain work is published, they will receive sacks of letters from readers (the most impressive detail to me is that there will be pictures of beautiful female readers) But, No readers have given me feedback.No critics ever noticed me, nor did anyone close to me say they read my stuff.Of course, my writing was "undercover" because I feared I might fail.What I expected, though, was to be surprised in magazines by colleagues and friends around me after I became a writer.Now, I'm "successful", already a "provincial college contract producer", but no one ever seems to know it. I blame this on not having published anything in a "first class journal".I deliberately went to the library of my unit to check, and there were indeed no subscriptions to provincial periodicals such as "Yalu River" or "Northern Literature". Today, I made an appearance on "Zhongshan".There is indeed this magazine in the library.Those critics must have read this magazine too.This time, I have entered the literary world, showing my face, right? Sure enough, in the second month after seeing the magazine, I received a letter from the reader.This reader is quite unusual: she is He Qinglian, a scholar whose book "Modernization Trap" aroused national repercussions at that time.She said that she felt very "shocked" after reading "Nowhere to Take" on "Zhongshan", so she asked the editor-in-chief Fu Xiaohong to ask for my contact information.She said a lot of words of affirmation.She also said that she studied history first and then economics, which was the exact opposite of me.She finally said that she was in a very bad situation "because of rumors and disasters" at this time... In short, the letter was very long, and three of her books were sent along with the letter, one of which was inscribed "The sword is given to the martyrs" "Five big characters. Of course I'm excited.Of course I'm excited.I wait for more reactions, reactions to what I consider to be my best work so far. Unexpectedly, this letter from He Qinglian has become an absolute hit.After that, I never heard any feedback from readers of literary journals, let alone from critics or literary authorities.It seems that no one has ever borrowed the "Zhong Shan" in the library of the unit.With all my strength, I threw a big stone into the lake, and then listened: half a day passed without a sound. It turned out that the lake wasn't there. Only then did I suddenly realize that the "80s" had passed and the world had changed. In the 1980s, a literary publication sold tens of millions.Even "Yalu River" in the northeast frontier once had a circulation of 400,000 copies. "A copy of "October" or "Contemporary" often flows among the university dormitories first, and then it may continue to perform Brownian motion among barbershops, hospital wards, factory workshops, and store counters; it may also be from cousin to cousin to The cousin's boyfriend to the boyfriend's class teacher...until it disappeared." Only ten years later, this scene seems like a lifetime ago.One editor said, "You can't ask the editor of a poetry journal how many copies his magazine has, it's like asking a woman her age." Literature can no longer create a sensation, no longer can change a person's destiny, so the most talented people no longer engage in literature.They go into politics, business, and become white-collar workers who follow the rules, which is more reliable than being a literary youth.Many talented writers have switched careers to work for directors, writing movies and TV series. "Literature" has become a small circle of things.Generally speaking, only the editor and a few colleagues you have notified will read the works you publish. The above two changes are reciprocal causes and effects, and most of the literature has also bid farewell to society and readers, and has only become a weak inertia.In the 1980s, literature thought for the people of the whole country, enlightened the people of the whole country, pointed out the country, and aroused the "fighting spirit".Today, literature has become "pure", but it is also so pure that there are no fish when the water is clear. Can't say I didn't get feedback either.Not long after learning that I had published something, a section chief of China Construction Bank had a serious discussion with me on the topic of "writing".According to his understanding, among writers, those who write prose are normal, those who write novels are quasi-mental patients, and writing poetry is the conclusive evidence that a person has mental problems. At the same time, the age when I devoted myself to writing was a critical time for young people in small and medium-sized cities to find a partner. Not only did it not become a signboard for me to attract unmarried young women, but it became a proof that I was not a good marriage partner: it proved that I would not be able to climb the road of deputy section chief, section chief, and deputy director, but instead became a Possibility of the wanderer.After I escaped from the position of "President Secretary", this symptom became more obvious.Looking back at my college classmates, most of them have become section chiefs, some have become deputy directors or directors, and some have become billionaires.
Strangely, I wasn't overly depressed knowing this fact.As an ordinary college graduate in a small city, my ideals can be long or short, big or small, like a rubber band, and I can have wild dreams or forget them the next morning.Although I can't "succeed and become famous" by writing, I have discovered and got used to the joy of writing. Writing is painful.Writing needs to mobilize oneself to the most active, excited, and powerful state, so that you can drive everything in your chest as you like, and only then can you approach the ideal perfect state.Therefore, the writer must have a particularly strong willpower and need to spur the brain relentlessly.This kind of perfectionism in writing overwhelms me, but without it, I can't get the kind of hearty and exciting experience. Writing is fun again.My character is the kind of person who is used to competing with myself.I think the most suitable job for me may be a mason or carpenter: sitting quietly in an undisturbed place and knocking something to make it appear in the most suitable shape.The process alone is satisfying enough. More and more, I find that what drives my writing is curiosity.The world we are told and the real world are as far apart as two planets.This gap is even more pronounced in the field of history.When I was reading historical materials in the Dalian Library during college, I was constantly surprised, amazed and even exclaimed.Expressing this surprise is actually the initial motivation for me to write history.Writing history is a journey and an adventure for me: in the pile of old papers, you can find clues everywhere.Follow these clues, wipe off the dust and paint on the historical fragments, and carefully piece them together, you will find that the face of history is almost completely different from what you imagined.In the beginning, I focused on human nature in history.As Mo Yan said in an article evaluating me, what I focus on is the complexity of human nature.In history, all kinds of plots have appeared, and all kinds of strangeness, unimaginability and unexpectedness of human nature have been shown. I am obsessed with observing this complexity, and I am obsessed with restoring one face after another, proudly pointing to others and saying: look , He turned out to be like this!Later, my curiosity shifted more to the laws of history itself.I began to observe the peasant uprising, the Chinese people's dream of a prosperous age, and the origin of China's autocratic system... I was surprised to find that almost all of the concepts I took for granted in my mind were inaccurate.For example, what the peasant uprising mainly promoted was not the progress of history, but the progress of the autocratic system; for example, almost all Chinese-style prosperous times were built on the basis of a great decline and ended in decline; such as those in the Spring and Autumn and Warring States periods Free-thinking people, almost all of them are calling for a unified authoritarian regime... These observations and thoughts of mine are completely wild fox Zen style, far from the "academic paradigm". My conclusion may be ridiculous and off topic, but I am enjoying myself.My writing is completely free-wheeling and free-spirited.Abandon everything, sink in the study, sort out my thoughts little by little, answer my questions, and the result is to type out an article.The feeling of concentration, simplicity and tranquility that is left alone in the world is indeed a great happiness. In this way, I entered history from a standard "literary youth".History is the foundation of the social studies, and following this path you will pass the rooms of the humanities involuntarily.Along the way, through writing, I have a deeper and broader understanding of the world.From 1996 to now, my thinking has undergone tremendous changes.My understanding of society, history, and culture has subverted myself in many aspects.And the way of this transformation process is precisely because of writing. Writing also brought me real "benefits".In the beginning, in order not to be misunderstood, I wrote underground.And after discovering that "writers" had become a different kind, I even buried the published things in the deep drawer: it was better to have no one to communicate with than those insincere and inappropriate "appreciation".Later, by chance, President Wang Yi read a few articles I wrote.Although the president does not have a high diploma, he has a wide range of interests and knowledge.More importantly, their generation also believed that writing was a big thing, a good thing.He said, you are a material for writing, and I will create a writing environment for you. So he transferred me to the sales department of the city bank, because Dong Qingyi, the director of the sales department (he died in a car accident the year before last, may he be safe and happy in heaven) is open-minded and magnanimous.With the acquiescence of him and the president, I only need to go to work one or two days a week, and during the rest of the time, I can be a serious "writer" at home.This is naturally the luck that writing brings me.Every morning at 6:30, I get up for a walk, go home, take a shower, listen to the people on the first floor being empty, make a pot of tea, press the computer, watch the tea smoke rise, and listen to the "rustle" of the computer With the sound of startup, the whole room is as quiet as an ancient tomb.At this time, I am deeply grateful to the world for being so tolerant to me.Even if the things I write can never attract attention, I will be satisfied if I can always enjoy this kind of study life.
However, the joy of writing on the other side is dissemination and communication after all.Every jade grinder hopes that his jade Guanyin can be appreciated by others.What's more, people who grew up in Mao culture have a bit of the old-fashioned idea of "writing to convey the truth". An unexpected opportunity led me to discover another way to approach readers.那是一九九九年底，我到北京出差，因为《鸭绿江》主编刘元举先生介绍，认识了时事出版社工作的沈阳人祝勇。祝勇知道我在写东西，让我发几篇给他看看。 过了几天，祝勇给我打来电话：我想给你出本书，行不行？你的水平完全可以出一本书，而且我估计书可能卖得很好。 于是，在二OOO年一月一日，我的第一本书《千年悖论》出版了，汇集了我写作初期的大部分作品，其中主要的当然是“历史文化散文”。说实话，在此之前，我从来没有考虑过出版的可能性。因为在我看来，出书实在是比在杂志上发表作品重大得多的事。在我的印象中，一个人一般要人到中年，德高望重，作品积累到一定数量了，才有可能出一本书。因此，虽然稿费只有每千字三十，虽然封面做得有点不伦不类，我还是感觉很兴奋。 这本书起印五千册，出来后很快就淹没在众多新书当中。虽然不久都卖光了，但是在读书界没有引起什么关注。 不过令我高兴的是读者却有了反馈。读者大部分都是大学生，奇怪的是，他们几乎都是在大学图书馆读到的这本书。有几个大学生给我来信说，这本书“颠覆了他们的大脑”，“千年悖论，让我们觉醒，第一次从人的角度来考虑这些历史人物的种种作为”。 我很高兴这本书能触动一些人，能让他们感受到我的愤怒、惊讶、感慨、激动，能颠覆他们对历史的一些成见：这正是我在书房里不懈敲打的目的。 我发现，出版是将自己的写作抵达读者的大路。出版的传播力比在传统文学杂志上发表要大得多，有效得多。今天的文学期刊，读者群基本已经净化为“纯文学读者”。虽然一开始我走的是“文学之路”，但其实我的作品并非标准化的“文学性写作”，我写的虽然都是历史，但是离现实可能比大部分小说都要近。它们的读者，更多在文学期刊的订阅者之外。而且最关键的一点是，出版社的编辑与文学期刊的编辑完全不同：大部分出版机构都需要赚钱养活自己，因此特别在意一本书的市场反应。与文学期刊疏离了社会不同，出版业已经相当市场化，编辑们睁大眼睛寻找每一位有读者的作家。 所以，除了第二本书的出版颇遇艰难外，我的书出版都非常顺利。特别是第三本书《大明王朝的七张面孔》出版之后。 《大明王朝的七张面孔》出版不久，我在报纸上网上很快见到了白岩松、柴静评论了这本书。影星袁莉在我经常看的《锵锵三人行》中提到了这本书，那年《艺术人生》的年终评点，张越、崔永元等几位嘉宾似乎也提到了这本书……于是我意识到这本书引起了广泛的关注。虽然出版社没有进行过一个字的宣传推广，但是这本书通过口碑相传，渐渐传播开来。印数很快就过了三万册，而在文化类书里面，据说三万册就算畅销书。再以后，我的《中国人的性格历程》、《曾国藩的正面与侧面》也陆续成为历史文化类的“畅销书”：从《大明王朝的七张面孔》起，我算是有了自己的读者群，隔三差五地收到读者来信，其中有一封是当时身在美国的留学生，后来的青年学者刘瑜的信（特别令我感动的，是一位读者将我的三万多字的《无处收留》一笔一划地抄在一个小本本上送给了我）。我能够知道，自己的写作，对一些人确实发生了影响。 让自己的写作抵达读者，我用了将近十年的时间。
在主要传播方式转为出版的同时，我的传统“作家”之路仍然自然延伸。我的一位朋友作家钟求是有一次和我通电话时说，我感觉你的东西挺适合《当代》的风格。你寄给我的朋友吴玄吧，他现在在《当代》做编辑。 我按钟求是提供的邮箱寄去了几篇稿子。一周后，吴玄打来电话，说他已经与主编洪清波达成一致意见，打算从二OO六年起，为我开一个专栏。这对我来说完全是意想不到的事。专栏的名字后来定为“史纪”。这成了我在“纯文学”领域最辉煌的“业绩”。我获得了一些省级文学奖和一项不太重要的“国家级文学奖”。对了，还有“文学创作一级”这个职称。因为这些成绩，我成为省作协的“理事”，后来又成为“主席团成员”，还成了一个市作协的“副主席”。我参加了“青创会”，并且见到了常委同志。这是我“纯文学”之路的顶峰。从一个小城市的无依无傍、赤手空拳的草根青年，到一个地级市的“作家协会副主席”，这就是我爬过的“文学之峰”的高度。 不过，整体来说，我的“纯文学”之路走得不温不火，换句话说，其实是不太成功。用某个文学前辈推心置腹的话来说，你不会经营自己。你怎么不开个研讨会，找几个有名的评论家评论一下子，给你归成一个什么文学现象。那你不就火了？ 前辈说得轻松。我知道事实并非如此简单。我的作品并非传统意义上的“纯文学”，我也没有什么过人的才气。这把火哪那么容易“点着”。 不过，他说的也并非没有一点道理。作为一个写了相当年头的作家，我对一些心照不宣的事也相当清楚：在任何领域，都没有那么多“顺理成章”。只要你的才气不足以掀翻地球，那么你就有必要“经营”一下自己。 这就是中国“圈子社会”的现实。如果有了人脉连接，你完全可以事半功倍，甚至四两拔千斤。事实上，我写作生涯的大部分“成功”，除了一开始几篇“自发投稿”是完全自我奋斗之外，其他的重要几步，也都是在人脉的连接下完成的：那篇《无处收留》最终得以在“一流刊物”上发表，毕竟是文能先生不懈推荐的结果。第一本书的出版，则是刘元举先生向老乡祝勇介绍我的副产品。《大明王朝的七张面孔》在广西师范大学出版社这样好的出版社出版，是因为在那之前认识了丁东先生，再加上章诒和先生的序。而我的《曾国藩的正面与侧面》卖得不错，柴静写的那个跋和刘瑜、老六的帮着吆喝自然功不可没……我不得不承认，“圈子”其实也是一种正常的生活状态：这个时代，信息的大海之中，你其实只能看到进入视野的这一小片儿。这在任何国家都是常理，只不过在中国社会，人们更习惯于这种“手工式”的联结。这是一个大家都在叫喊和跳跃的时代，如果想要从草根地位到达成功高度，你需要喊破嗓子，跳上桌子。 但我还是修正不了心中那个奇怪的“应该”情结。 那一天，和一个朋友聊天，屈指数起我们认识的所有文学朋友，大大小小百十来人，没开过文学性的“作品研讨会”的，只有我一个。有一次，一位对我一直很欣赏的文学活动家和我详细谈了给我开研讨会的计划，我不置可否，结果他很生气，觉得我过于“傲慢自大”，从此很少再与我来往。 我根本不是什么“清高孤介”。作为一个不善于拒绝的人，我也对别人说过很多言不由衷的话，我也请过一位文学奖的评委朋友吃过饭，我也曾画虎不成反类犬地学习过“应酬”，我也曾经很想在圈内获得“成功”，以便能获得各种相关的好处。我只是后来确定，我喜欢“舒服”多过“成功”。 作为一个读过些中国历史的人，理智上我对“人情社会”的规矩抱有高度的“同情之理解”，但是在感情上，我却无法经常地勉强自己。我是一个羞涩的人，帮我开了专栏的吴玄，我后来在一次文学会议上见到，我居然没好意思对他表达我的感谢之意。归根结底，也许是成长的背景，让我一直固执地以为有一种“应该”，有一种“清洁”。我纠正不了这个“错觉”。 坚持这种“应该”经常让我与身边的生活产生一点排异。比如虽然“名人荐书”现在已经是再常见不过的现象，我的几本书也都请他人进行过推荐，但我一直觉得推荐应该是一件严肃的事。不止一个朋友请我为其书写推荐语，我读了作品后都极力推卸了，因此得罪了好友，也只好认了。爱惜羽毛、不辜负读者对自己的信任，这一选择似乎不需要经过任何思考。 不料前些天在网上浏览时，看到一则新书的宣传文章，介绍一本马上要出版的历史类书籍。封面上印着李承鹏等四个人推荐，其中一个赫然是我的名字。更为离奇的是，封底还有“我写的”一段推荐语。而事实上，对这本书，这个作者，甚至这个编辑，都一无所知。 我致电这家我很熟悉的著名民营出版机构，问是怎么回事。编辑说张老师，那个推荐语是我写的，我忘了征求您同意了！ 我说那赶紧去掉我的名字吧，我不能推荐这本书。编辑很惊讶，说，推荐一本书也不是多大的事儿，张老师您就同意吧，请您推荐，不是说明您在读者心目中有很大影响吗？这是好事啊！我觉得那推荐语写得也不错啊！ 我费了好多口舌之后，编辑才相信我是认真的。她说，封面已经印出来了，如果更改，要损失很多钱。经她请求，出版机构的领导同意给我一笔丰厚的推荐费，以换取我不撤掉推荐。 我拒不同意。编辑又找到我的一位好友做我的工作，原来编辑是辽宁人，是我好友的同学的侄女。据说好朋友的同学为这事还专门跑了趟沈阳： 因为小编辑刚刚工作不久，如果让出版社蒙受损失，可能会失去工作。 这位朋友以前很热心地帮过我的忙。他多次打来电话，劝我想开一点。 现在推荐一本书，谁还当成多大的事呢？ 但最后，我还是拒绝了朋友的请求，坚持要求出版公司修改了封面。我的处理结果，既得罪了出版公司，又得罪了朋友，还可能使一位小编辑的前途受了影响。许多人听说这件事，都说我做得不对。 我的“心理疾病”确实令我落伍了吗？
因为现在身为清华大学历史专业的博士后，与“学术圈儿”的交往比“文学圈儿”还要多，所以我现在应该算是游离在“文学体制”的边缘，介于文学社会和普通社会之间，我发现了一个有趣的现象：在“纯文学”范围内，几乎没有人知道我出过《大明王朝的七张面孔》之类的书。而《大明王朝的七张面孔》的读者，也很少有人知道我在《当代》上开有专栏：他们很少读文学期刊。“纯文学”和“普通阅读”，几乎井水不犯河水。 作家的阅读大都固定在纯文学范围内，每一次文学圈内的会议，大家带的书，谈论的阅读，大都是最新的外国文学作品。他们的作品，也基本都在严格的“文学艺术”范围之内，致力于艺术质量。 “文学圈”远比“学术圈”更远离普通社会。每一次学术会议，那些专家学者私下交谈的，都是社会热点，大局走向，民心民生，一个个慷慨激昂。而每一次文学会议，朋友们聊的仍然是我最近又在哪本杂志上发了什么东西，哪篇被转载了，哪部作品又被列为“重点扶持”。这些作品，可能“圈外人”永远看不到。或者是某某作协里，谁和谁又打起来了，谁又偷偷把另一个人办公桌上的稿费单冲进厕所了。在某个笔会上，某某和某某划拳，以决定某个女作家今晚睡在哪里……和这个社会密切相关的唯一一点，是探讨如何把小说改编成电视剧。 我读到一些对文学体制反思的声音，我认同其中的一些说法。我和朋友们开过一些玩笑。不过，任何事情都不是小葱拌豆腐式地定义的。我在“文学圈”里遇到过许多温暖的人和温暖的瞬间，遇到过很多认真的编辑和几本敬业的杂志，让我想起“八十年代”整个社会精英与国家同方向前进时的干净清爽。比如《天涯》杂志多年前开的一次笔会。 如前所述，我的《无处收留》当初被《天涯》因为太长委婉拒绝。当它在《钟山》上发表后，《天涯》副主编李少君写来一封约稿信，说韩少功看到《钟山》上的这篇文章，批评了他，说他错过了一篇好文章。 于是我接连在《天涯》上发表了几篇东西。说实在的，《天涯》这本刊物在所有文学刊物里最适合我，因为它办得不那么“纯文学”，而是更注重思想性和杂糅性，与我的写作风格比较合拍。 2001年，我意外地得到《天涯》的邀请，年底到海南开笔会。“笔会”两个字，在文学青年时代特别令我向往，在我的幻想中，那应该是一个小团体的神仙会一样的精神会餐。大学里读文学杂志的时代，我多少次幻想自己将来也能参加“笔会”，这个梦想终于实现了。 到了海南才发现，这是一个很小规模的笔会，只有九个人。除了我，其他人都是鼎鼎大名：张承志、莫言、李陀、王晓明、翟永明、汪晖。还有主人韩少功和蒋子丹。所有的人我都是第一次见到。他们大都是我心目中的文学英雄，比如张承志的我就读过多次。我很奇怪，为什么韩少功要请我这样一个名不见经传的小人物参加这个笔会。不管怎么样，我心中难免暗自激动。 一见面，张承志就开起玩笑：“我像不像本·拉登？” 那时“九一一”刚刚过去一个多月。朝他提示的方向去感觉，是有点像。体格粗壮，大鼻大脸，眉毛又粗又长，头顶毛发已经稀疏，声音重得近乎发瓮，显然雄性激素十分发达。和想象中的把编辑从家中骂跑的孤傲不同，张承志礼貌周到，出人意料地随和。 那是我第一次到海南，感觉很新鲜。汽车沿环岛高速路行驶。山峦优美，千万株桉树见缝插针，热火朝天地竞争、拥挤、勾结、倾轧，迫不急待地生长。开会的地址是岛内的七仙岭，这是白云缭绕下的一座黛青大山，山顶七峰并立，如同七位仙人侧立。推开窗子，遍地椰树的翠叶在阳光下闪闪发光。 和这些“文学英雄”在一起，我感觉又兴奋，又舒服。他们都真实朴素而自然，他们身上，有着我想象的“八十年代气质”。这个会上聊的许多东西，现在已经没有印象了。只记得莫言对于大家在会上总是“胸怀宇宙”有他自己的看法。吃饭的时候，他端着酒杯，抿着红酒，随口编了个顺口溜： 这是一个分裂的时代，又是一个整合的时代。 这是一个破坏的年代，又是一个建设的年代。 这是乡下人进城打工的年代，又是韩少功下乡隐居的年代。 这是文学似乎能影响社会的年代，又是文学一钱不值的年代。 文学圈里，拉帮结伙的多了，孤军奋战的少了。 无耻吹捧的多了，严肃批评的少了。 自高自大的多了，谦虚谨慎的少了。 出版的作品越来越多了，好的作品越来越少了。 关心国家大事的多了，关心文学的少了。 冒充理论家的作家越来越多了，像我这样不会说话的越来越少了。 丰乳的方法越来越多了，能分泌乳汁的乳房越来越少了。 ……他一口气编完，大家都大笑。蒋子丹立刻要求，这串顺口溜要交给《天涯》，放到“作家立场”里发表。 这个笔会让我感觉到八十年代的文学热的余温。
一九九六年，当我拿起笔的时候，误以为写作能给我带来一切。转眼，写作已经十六年了。我也由大学刚毕业的青年，接近中年，人生中最美好的年华付给了书桌。抬头一看，几乎一切都已经沧海桑田。 十六年的时间已经把我身边的很多人变成了我所不认识的另一个人。我的一位朋友，当年因为自小怀抱了当作家的梦想，拒绝给当地主要领导当秘书。如果那时他从政，现在至少也当一届县长了。当年，一谈起文学，谈起社会，他总是眼含泪水。而如今，他开始沉醉于一个鸡肋一样有名无权的副处级小官职，以善于讲话和敬酒而闻名，在他偶尔批判什么的慷慨悲愤中，每一次都夹杂着自己的巧妙诉求。有一次酒后，他对我说：操，鸡巴十几年，白活了。要是让我重新活，我才不他妈当什么作家呢！ 是啊，这个世界变化太快了，事实上我们这一代人也许是中国历史上最为“沧桑”的一代：通常状态下几代人才能经历的历史变化，都压缩到我们这一代身上。应该说，有一些变化，是必然的。但是，也有一些变化是令我意外的。比如我今天在网上看到这样一则新闻： “《蔓蔓青萝》、《泡沫之夏》、《潇然梦》……今日，某大学图书馆公布其2009年秋季学期借阅书籍排行榜，前100名几乎全为网络文学书籍。据该排行榜显示，除了排名第51名的《宋氏三姐妹》和排名第100名的《最易掌握的学英语规律338条》，其余的均为在网络上曾风靡一时的网络文学作品，如《玥影横斜》、《爱在唐朝》、《失踪的王妃》等，以及郭敬明、明晓溪、安妮宝贝等青春小资文学作品。而与高校专业课程相关的书籍均无缘入榜……” 自己坐在大连市图书馆，翻读文学期刊的情景宛如昨日，读到这样的新闻，怎能让人不恍如隔世？当我恍惚的事情越来越多，比如发现整整一代人的一生精力可能被一套房子套牢。我不得不说，这个世界的走向，不是我所想象。在二十多年前，这个世界就已经转向，离我们而去。我们这些人，是最后一代“文学青年”。
现在的我，已经成了历史写作中的“资深”一员。资深的一个证据，就是作品纷纷开始再版。 想当初和广西师大贝贝特签合同的时候，因为是丁东老师引见，所以在谈合同时没有提出任何条件。书出了几年后，才发现版权期居然是八年而不是常见的五年。人们常爱用八年抗战这个词，这说明在人的感觉里，八年是一个有点长的时段。确实，在这八年里，我换了两次工作，读了一个博士，又出了四本书。但是每一次自我介绍的时候，如果只能写一本书，我还是会写《大明王朝的七张面孔》。确实，这是我最满意的一本书，也是读者们提到我时最常提起的书。 在这八年当中，有很多家出版机构提出提前再版这本书，但是原出版方一直没有同意，虽然后来在整整六年间，权版页上的印数没再被改过。这是中国出版界常见的现象之一。现在，时间到了，为了这本书给我打了无数次电话的吴怀尧开始操作这本书的再版。 这次再版最大的变化，是朱元璋一章，由原来的七万多字，扩展成近二十万字，就是说，由一篇人物随笔扩展成了一本书，一本完整的《朱元璋传》。希望它在已经出版的众多《朱元璋传》中，仍然能显现出自己的个性。 其他篇章，进行的调整比较小。现在回顾早年文字，有些地方，还闻得到青涩味道。可是，我很珍视这些文字，因为它们是不可复制的。每个生命阶段的文字质地是不一样的。虽然我的早年文字中时有“为赋新诗强说愁”的做作，但是这些文字里面，灌注着力量、激情和理想。在这些青涩的文字中，我能感觉到自己彼时的单纯，感觉到奔涌的生命能量，感觉到自己当初用大铁锤去砸蝴蝶翅膀的雄壮。
Only those who have experienced the 1980s can understand what the word "writer" meant in that era. It was an era when everyone read literary journals.When a novel is published in a well-known literary journal, it is known and talked about by the whole country.It was a time when writers were social spiritual guides. It is believed that the writer is the conscience of society, the embodiment of justice, and the proclaimer of the future.At that time, writing could completely change a person's destiny, and publishing a novel that attracted attention could turn a person from the bottom of society into the focus of national discussion overnight.If a person has a collection of poems and claims to love literature, he can travel the world (to paraphrase Gao Xiaosong's words, "People at that time believed that children who played the piano were good children", and people believed that children who could write poems were even better children), and people's hearts are as white as white. The lotus has just bloomed. I grew up in such an atmosphere, and I live in Chaoyang City, Liaoning Province, which is an ancient frontier city with a particularly simple respect for culture and literature.Last year, I went back to Chaoyang to handle my mother's medical reimbursement (my mother retired in Chaoyang City).The cousin-in-law who accompanied me was very clever and told the staff that he is a writer!As he spoke, he took out a book I just gave him. Immediately, the whole office was in a commotion, everyone stood up and rushed to pass the book around.The section chief brought me a chair and asked me to sit down, and another person handed me hot water.People treat it like a big man who comes to inspect.All the way to the green light, everything will be done soon. In an era when "writers" are so devalued, this place still maintains such a simple respect for words, so one can imagine how grand this respect would be twenty years ago! People in the ancient city think that reading must be a good thing.No one taught himself to love reading, but books were almost the only entertainment besides games as a child.When I was in junior high school, I applied for a library card in the Chaoyang City Library and the Municipal Government Library.I had no choice but to borrow "masterpieces", of course, those that I could barely understand.What,,, "Vanity Fair"... I remember traveling to Beidaihe one summer, I sat in the first row of the bus, holding a thick book in my hand, and was angry all the way because I couldn't understand it. From the perspective of a junior high school student, this is the cultural landscape when I was growing up.On the one hand, we don't have many books to read. On the other hand, the books that hit our hands are generally of a hard quality, which makes every reader a drill.The vocabulary of shallow reading, light reading, and soft reading had not yet appeared at that time. More literary edification occurred in the early 1990s when I was in college. After all, there are more books in the university library.Wang Anyi, Han Shaogong, Mo Yan, Han Dong, Wang Shuo, one after another.Re-reading what you didn't read in high school, and being obsessed with Tolstoy and Dostoyevsky since then... You can't help being a literary youth after going through this.
But before I started working, I didn't really think about being a writer.In the university, I devoted a lot of spare time to calligraphy and seal cutting, and joined the calligraphy association of the university.In addition to the fact that the word "writer" is too lofty in my mind, it is also because I somehow think that being a writer is something that at least needs to be established and experienced before you can try it (this impression may be formed because it was popular in the 1980s. Most of the momentary writers were educated youths of a certain age). The start of writing happened after working for a year.The motivation for writing is fairly simple: boredom.After graduating from university, I originally wanted to work hard, first "mixed" (in my dad's words, it was "boiled") to the rank of deputy director, could use public funds to treat guests to dinner, and have status and face in a small city. A universal ideal of someone who grew up in a small northern town.But after graduating from university in 1994 and working in the Construction Bank of Huludao City, I found that "mixing" and "boiling" were quite difficult things for me: a week's work can basically be dealt with in a day or two .Most of the rest of the time is mainly spent playing poker.At that time, the state-owned banks had not carried out shareholding reform, and the working atmosphere was similar to that of government agencies.I remember that for quite a while, shortly after going to work every day, a few of us in Corey used newspaper to paste the glass beams on the door, arched pigs and fried golden flowers in it, and a dozen of them lasted a whole day. Although this kind of life is comfortable, but after a long time, it will feel empty and boring.What better way to pass the time?I can't write brush characters or draw pictures in my work unit.So, write something. I remembered that I seemed to have a little "literary genius": when I was in the fifth grade of elementary school, my composition was once used as a model essay by the teacher.Tolstoy said that the most important thing to be a writer is to have a strong vanity. Fortunately, this quality, I also have. What to write?Anything goes, as long as it's not mediocre.You know, I grew up loving to make myself different.I have been reading every "Xinhua Digest" I can get my hands on since junior high school. The more long articles I can't understand, the more I read them.In the summer vacation of the second year of junior high school, I borrowed the book and read it for ten mornings in the park. Of course, I still didn’t understand it in the end.Since childhood, as long as there are words, whether it is astronomy, geography, medicine, agriculture, biology, natural science, superstition or even a calendar, I can read it with relish.During my four years in college, I basically stayed in the Dalian library. I read the most history books, and the North Korean Illustrated which introduced the happy life of the Korean people.So as of now, there are too many strange things in my stomach.Although the word "Yu Qiuyu" has broken the market today, I never deny that the so-called "cultural prose" writing method made me suddenly enlightened.This kind of swaying narrative style just mixed up the mess in my stomach and pulled out my brain. In half a year, I wrote several long essays such as "Boundless Mongolia" and "Nowhere to Take Shelter: Wu Sangui".Among them, my favorite is "Nowhere to Shelter: Wu Sangui". I became interested in Wu Sangui because I read a very thin book "Rebel Wu Sangui". I found that this severely facialized person was actually famous for his "filial piety and bravery" when he was young.Young Wu Sangui was a handsome man, he was polite when he got off the horse, and he was very brave when he got on the horse, which was quite praised by the people of the time.From the highest point of morality to rebellion and rebellion to capture the "old master" in order to serve the new master, what kind of spiritual earthquake and soul tearing did he experience?I also bought another book "Research on San Francisco in the Qing Dynasty" written by Professor Liu Fengyun, and found all the materials related to Wu Sangui and that era that I could find at that time. Like a snail, the spiritual process of taking off the moral mask layer by layer. In terms of style, it is not a donkey or a horse, it is not pure prose, nor can it be called a novel.It is a hybrid of narrative and thinking, a monster of alloy body.Later, critics defined this kind of thing as "cross-style writing".Someone later said: "Zhang Hongjie's writing is to a certain extent a typical cross-genre writing, mixed with a lot of novel style, historical reportage style, and even psychoanalytic style of writing." I am quite satisfied with this article, and think that I can start the second required action for literary youth: submitting a manuscript.
To become a "writer" at that time, one had to submit articles to literary magazines.Literary magazines are a single-plank bridge leading to the literary world.The Internet was just emerging at that time, and the term Internet literature had not yet appeared.Every "literary youth" must first "show his face" in literary journals.The general way is to first "emerge" in "provincial and municipal" literary journals, and then attract attention in "national journals".In this way, you have the opportunity to participate in various literary activities such as PEN gatherings, and you are eligible to join the city, province, and even the Chinese Writers Association.Your next goal is to be recognized by some well-known critics and literary authorities, and to win some "provincial" or even "national" literary awards, so that you will get an "official position" in the Writers Association system, such as a certain Chairman of the City Writers Association, Vice Chairman of a Provincial Writers Association.In this way, even if you are successful and famous, you can be called a "well-known writer", and you are eligible to attend honorary conferences such as the "National Congress of the Chinese Writers Association" or the "National Youth Writers' Creation Conference", and enjoy free travel abroad organized by writers associations at all levels. activities like this.This was the writer's path of a normal literary youth at that time. At that time, people never dreamed that ten years later, there would be many people, such as Mingyue, who just posted their words on the Internet, and they might be followed by the majority of netizens and become popular domestic best-selling authors.What's more unexpected is that a young Han Han actually rejected the invitation to join the Writers Association. In other words, when I started writing, the editors of literary magazines, literary critics, and literary authorities were the three gates on the road to the success of a literary youth, and you had to overcome them one by one.The first thing to do, of course, is to knock on the door of the literary magazine.As part of the literary system, until today, every province in the country has at least one "pure literature periodical".According to the standards in the "literary circle", literary periodicals can be roughly divided into two levels.The first level is "provincial level", such as Liaoning's "Yalu River" and Heilongjiang's "Northern Literature". These publications have relatively limited influence. In other words, they can be called second-rate literary journals.The other level is "national level", which also includes some influential local publications.Generally speaking, "Contemporary", "October", "Everyone", "Zhongshan", "The End of the World", "People's Literature", "Flower City", "Writer"... The number one recognized by everyone, of course. Unlike ordinary literary youths who first submit to "provincial periodicals", I submitted the article "Nowhere to Take" for the first time. I am determined to use this work as the opening shot, blasting away my "writer" road.Compared with other "cultural essays" in literary journals at that time, I think this article is by no means inferior.I am somehow convinced that it will be well received by the editors.After the manuscript was sent away, I kept imagining the fate of this big envelope in Harvest Magazine.I imagined that one morning, an editor casually opened the envelope with a yawn, read a few paragraphs, sat up straight, read a few more pages, slapped the table, yelled, and called out to the other editors Come and see... I fantasize that this work will let the Chinese literary world know that there is a 24-year-old "young writer" named Zhang Hongjie, who is better at describing human nature in history than Yu Qiuyu... I fantasize that the trajectory of my life will be from now on. change.Receiving manuscript fees, participating in various pen meetings, admiring eyes from colleagues, escaping from this boring job... Changing destiny through writing is a common legend in that era. Half a month after I voted, I often went to the communication room of the unit.But until the beginning of the third month, there was still no reply.Although I have never submitted a manuscript, I have read literary magazines for many years, and I have a lot of common knowledge about literature.I know that the review period for literary journals is three months.
I wasn't discouraged in the slightest.Although I let go of my fantasy, I actually fully anticipated the difficulties on the road to writing from the very beginning: I regarded it as a heroic career that tested a person's will and ability, and a heroic career is unlikely to be smooth sailing.I have read many biographies of writers, and I am very impressed by the stories of writers whose submissions were repeatedly rejected.In particular, the arduous and dramatic struggle career in the film often makes me excited.The first time I submitted a manuscript, I submitted it to the best journal in my mind. In fact, it was more out of a try-and-see mentality.It doesn't matter if there is no response, there are still many first-class literary magazines. So I printed another copy and sent it to Contemporary. Three months later, I sent it to October again. After that, I learned the lesson: I started multiple submissions.I submitted to three journals at the same time, and I was ready to notify the other two immediately after receiving a manuscript letter from one. But within a year, I didn't even see what a rejection letter looked like: all the magazines didn't hear anything back. I began to wonder, like Jack London, whether there were living editors down the post. More often, I doubt whether I have the talent for writing.However, I did serve as a Chinese class representative in junior high school! People born in the Mao era were a little bit unwilling to admit defeat.I made up my mind: I will use three years to get through the path of writing.In the past three years, I will write 300,000 words.If the 300,000 words cannot be published, then it can be confirmed that I have no writing talent, and I will give up this matter forever.
One day not long after I made up my mind, I once again came to the reception room of my unit anxiously. I was terrified of my colleagues knowing that I was being rejected, and I didn't even let anyone know I had submitted it.Therefore, I take the initiative to pick up the newspapers and magazines ordered by the department. A medium-sized envelope was sandwiched among a pile of newspapers and magazines, with the words "Everybody Magazine" clearly written on it.My heart started pounding. There was no one in the office at noon, so I tore open the envelope, and inside was a flying script: "Mr. Zhang Hongjie: Your "Nowhere to Take" is wonderful! Accurate, strong, and full. The editorial department unanimously agrees to ask you for a draft, because "Everyone" will devote itself to launching a real but also more For literature, a more marginalized writing direction. "Nowhere to Shelter" is a bit too 'real', if it can be more personal, it can be published in "Everybody". Zhu Xiaohua." You can imagine my excitement.I was finally convinced that "literary career" was what I imagined it to be.There is such a group of dedicated people who are manipulating the soul or heart of mankind."Everyone" at that time Not long after the publication was founded, the upward momentum is very strong, and it is very stylish, with a large format, and the black cover with the portraits of previous Nobel Prize winners is very majestic.I have read Zhu Xiaohua's handsome letter many times, and I imagine that he must be a young man with long hair.I started to revise "Nowhere to Shelter" that night, moving closer to the "personal" style that I understand.Although it is not so sleepless at night, during the day my brain is like the brain in love, always thinking of the lover's face, always turning "Everyone" That black cover.After half a month, I sent the manuscript back, and then I just counted the days and waited. Two years of writing, and finally a "dream come true".Being able to publish your "first work" in a prestigious magazine like "Everyone" should be considered a beautiful beginning, right?Maybe in a few days, I will go to the "spring city" Kunming to hold a pen meeting. Three months later, the second letter came, and I eagerly opened it, but it was full of cold water: "Your "Nowhere to Take" failed to pass the review, saying that it will not publish historical themes for the time being. You are responsible for your own profits and losses, and you have to think more about how to go to the market. Many manuscripts that were originally selected have been suppressed, and you can think of ways elsewhere.”
I once made up my mind to publish my first novel in a first-class journal, and I would become a blockbuster and become famous in one fell swoop.There's only one thing I hate the most: mediocrity.However, after "Everybody" rejected the manuscript, I had to learn from the pain and had to make a major setback: In addition to my favorite manuscript "Nowhere to Take: Wu Sangui", I submitted other manuscripts such as "Boundless Mongolia" to the provincial government. High-level literary publication: I want to step into the "literary circle" first. The first thing that comes to mind is of course the "Yalu River" in Liaoning Province. Although not many people today may know that there is such a publication, it was once brilliant in the 1980s. The standard has been reduced by one file, and it seems to be smooth all the way: after more than a month, I received "Yalu River" An editor named Li Qingqing responded enthusiastically, and then, in the second issue of "Yalu River" in 1998 My "Boundless Mongolia" was published, so this article became my "first work". Since then, I have become friends with the poet Li Qingqing.Through correspondence with her, I discovered that it turned out that it was a small probability event that I was able to publish a work in such a provincial literary journal.She said that when she discovered my work, she had just been seconded to Yalu River as an editor from another unit. Most editors don't like to read unsolicited manuscripts, because more than 95% of them are unreasonable works.Only a novice like her is still interested in looking through it.She accidentally picked my envelope among the piles of natural contributions. Until then, I didn't know that there is such a thing as "natural contribution".In other words, most of the articles published in literary journals are not manuscripts that directly write "Accepted by XX Editorial Department" like I did.You must at least write the name of a specific editor, so that it is more likely to be disassembled and viewed.A more reliable approach is to try to get to know the editor first.At the very least, there must be an introduction from a friend first.Otherwise, your chances of "success" will be much lower.Generally speaking, the "natural contributions" published by a journal may only account for one-fifth to one-tenth. I was surprised.The "literary world" as I know it is not like this.In my mind, the "literary world" really means "higher than life". It should be a group of unworldly people operating according to unworldly rules.I've always believed that writers should be "natural submissions" from the start, and editors should treat all manuscripts equally.The existence of this "literary world", or in other words, the existence of such a group of people who resist the world, makes this world worth living.So this fact shocked me a lot and left me dazed for a long time.I think back to the days and nights I waited for the editors to reply, and now I realize that maybe the envelope I sent out has not been opened yet. However, this knowledge has no effect on me.After that, until today, under normal circumstances, I still insist on "spontaneous submission" (although I basically don't contribute today).The reason for this is because I thought it was "right" and it was part of my boyhood dream.Of course, as before, until today, more than 95% of my "spontaneous submissions" have received no response. This reflects some kind of "mental disease" in my personality, which I can't cure.
The publication of "Boundless Mongolia" marked that I "embarked on the road of literature"."Youth Literature", which can be regarded as a "national publication", also accepted my "natural contributions" and published my first and so far only novel "Speaking of Words". I still remember the editor who wrote back to me Called Chen Kun.Later, "Selected Essays" selected my essays on "Yalu River".Being selected is also a form of recognition.I have published some works in provincial literary journals one after another.Then, I was "discovered" by the Provincial Writers' Association and participated in the "Young Writers Training Class" of the Provincial College of Literature.After that, I became a "Provincial Literary Academy Contract Producer".This is a common practice of "encouraging literary creation" in various provinces: the Provincial Writers Association selects more than a dozen young and middle-aged writers who are the most powerful and able to produce "results" in the province, and sign contracts with them. A certain allowance will be given for the number of publications in "national" publications and the number of reprints.In the literary world of a province, this is considered a relatively important recognition.In other words, I am indeed a "young writer". However, I still haven't been able to get "Nowhere to Take" published in a "top" publication.This is a knot in my heart.I have never given up trying.This manuscript has not stopped running around on the mail road all day.Another editor echoed me back.Shortly after "Everybody" rejected the manuscript, an editor named Wen Neng of "Flower City" sent me a letter of acceptance.This letter clearly states that it will be published next year. At the end of the year, Wen Neng's second letter came: "Your manuscript has been confirmed to be published, but due to personal reasons, I will be transferred from the magazine. In addition, the internal relationship of the magazine is complicated, so this manuscript cannot be used. .I have already recommended it to other publications, please believe that this is a good work and it will definitely be published." A few months later, a letter from Li Shaojun in "The End of the World" proved that Mr. Wen Neng was indeed trying to help me: "Wen Neng turned over your article about Wu Sangui. We read it and thought it was very good. It can be published in Tianya, but it’s too long. Your skills and writing skills are good. If you have any other manuscripts, you can send them. You can send this one to see, they should be able to publish it.” ... Until 2001, the summer of the second year after I had published my first collection of essays, I went to the Liaoning Academy of Literature for a meeting.I had almost forgotten that a manuscript was still floating on the road, until a staff member of the Faculty of Arts threw a frayed brown paper envelope to me: "Please treat me! For your magazine, send it here coming." It was the first issue of "Zhong Shan" in 2001, and in the catalog column it was impressively written: ""Nowhere to Take", Zhang Hongjie".Because I was already a "Contract Producer of Liaoning Literature Institute" at that time, the magazine was sent here inexplicably.There was also a letter in the magazine, and the editor-in-chief Fu Xiaohong said that Wen Neng had forwarded the manuscript to her. This article has been running on the road non-stop for five years. In the past five years, I have changed from twenty-four years old to nearly thirty years old. , finally, in the end, in a "first-class publication" appeared.I am finally worthy of it. (As of today, I have not seen Mr. Wen Neng, not even a phone call. I don’t know where he is working now, or has retired.) I opened the magazine and read this "Nowhere to Take" from the beginning to the end. Read it again word for word.I remember a lot of good things I read in "Zhongshan" when I was in college: Su Tong, Yu Hua, Jia Pingwa, Wang Zengqi... Now, I have a vague feeling of standing side by side with them, my former literary heroes.
Before that, although I had published many things, I never found the feeling of being a "writer".In my memory, a real writer has a large number of readers and will receive rave reviews.Look at the interviews of those famous writers, don’t they all say that after a certain work is published, they will receive sacks of letters from readers (the most impressive detail to me is that there will be pictures of beautiful female readers) But, No readers have given me feedback.No critics ever noticed me, nor did anyone close to me say they read my stuff.Of course, my writing was "undercover" because I feared I might fail.What I expected, though, was to be surprised in magazines by colleagues and friends around me after I became a writer.Now, I'm "successful", already a "provincial college contract producer", but no one ever seems to know it. I blame this on not having published anything in a "first class journal".I deliberately went to the library of my unit to check, and there were indeed no subscriptions to provincial periodicals such as "Yalu River" or "Northern Literature". Today, I made an appearance on "Zhongshan".There is indeed this magazine in the library.Those critics must have read this magazine too.This time, I have entered the literary world, showing my face, right? Sure enough, in the second month after seeing the magazine, I received a letter from the reader.This reader is quite unusual: she is He Qinglian, a scholar whose book "Modernization Trap" aroused national repercussions at that time.She said that she felt very "shocked" after reading "Nowhere to Take" on "Zhongshan", so she asked the editor-in-chief Fu Xiaohong to ask for my contact information.She said a lot of words of affirmation.She also said that she studied history first and then economics, which was the exact opposite of me.She finally said that she was in a very bad situation "because of rumors and disasters" at this time... In short, the letter was very long, and three of her books were sent along with the letter, one of which was inscribed "The sword is given to the martyrs" "Five big characters. Of course I'm excited.Of course I'm excited.I wait for more reactions, reactions to what I consider to be my best work so far. Unexpectedly, this letter from He Qinglian has become an absolute hit.After that, I never heard any feedback from readers of literary journals, let alone from critics or literary authorities.It seems that no one has ever borrowed the "Zhong Shan" in the library of the unit.With all my strength, I threw a big stone into the lake, and then listened: half a day passed without a sound. It turned out that the lake wasn't there. Only then did I suddenly realize that the "80s" had passed and the world had changed. In the 1980s, a literary publication sold tens of millions.Even "Yalu River" in the northeast frontier once had a circulation of 400,000 copies. "A copy of "October" or "Contemporary" often flows among the university dormitories first, and then it may continue to perform Brownian motion among barbershops, hospital wards, factory workshops, and store counters; it may also be from cousin to cousin to The cousin's boyfriend to the boyfriend's class teacher...until it disappeared." Only ten years later, this scene seems like a lifetime ago.One editor said, "You can't ask the editor of a poetry journal how many copies his magazine has, it's like asking a woman her age." Literature can no longer create a sensation, no longer can change a person's destiny, so the most talented people no longer engage in literature.They go into politics, business, and become white-collar workers who follow the rules, which is more reliable than being a literary youth.Many talented writers have switched careers to work for directors, writing movies and TV series. "Literature" has become a small circle of things.Generally speaking, only the editor and a few colleagues you have notified will read the works you publish. The above two changes are reciprocal causes and effects, and most of the literature has also bid farewell to society and readers, and has only become a weak inertia.In the 1980s, literature thought for the people of the whole country, enlightened the people of the whole country, pointed out the country, and aroused the "fighting spirit".Today, literature has become "pure", but it is also so pure that there are no fish when the water is clear. Can't say I didn't get feedback either.Not long after learning that I had published something, a section chief of China Construction Bank had a serious discussion with me on the topic of "writing".According to his understanding, among writers, those who write prose are normal, those who write novels are quasi-mental patients, and writing poetry is the conclusive evidence that a person has mental problems. At the same time, the age when I devoted myself to writing was a critical time for young people in small and medium-sized cities to find a partner. Not only did it not become a signboard for me to attract unmarried young women, but it became a proof that I was not a good marriage partner: it proved that I would not be able to climb the road of deputy section chief, section chief, and deputy director, but instead became a Possibility of the wanderer.After I escaped from the position of "President Secretary", this symptom became more obvious.Looking back at my college classmates, most of them have become section chiefs, some have become deputy directors or directors, and some have become billionaires.
Strangely, I wasn't overly depressed knowing this fact.As an ordinary college graduate in a small city, my ideals can be long or short, big or small, like a rubber band, and I can have wild dreams or forget them the next morning.Although I can't "succeed and become famous" by writing, I have discovered and got used to the joy of writing. Writing is painful.Writing needs to mobilize oneself to the most active, excited, and powerful state, so that you can drive everything in your chest as you like, and only then can you approach the ideal perfect state.Therefore, the writer must have a particularly strong willpower and need to spur the brain relentlessly.This kind of perfectionism in writing overwhelms me, but without it, I can't get the kind of hearty and exciting experience. Writing is fun again.My character is the kind of person who is used to competing with myself.I think the most suitable job for me may be a mason or carpenter: sitting quietly in an undisturbed place and knocking something to make it appear in the most suitable shape.The process alone is satisfying enough. More and more, I find that what drives my writing is curiosity.The world we are told and the real world are as far apart as two planets.This gap is even more pronounced in the field of history.When I was reading historical materials in the Dalian Library during college, I was constantly surprised, amazed and even exclaimed.Expressing this surprise is actually the initial motivation for me to write history.Writing history is a journey and an adventure for me: in the pile of old papers, you can find clues everywhere.Follow these clues, wipe off the dust and paint on the historical fragments, and carefully piece them together, you will find that the face of history is almost completely different from what you imagined.In the beginning, I focused on human nature in history.As Mo Yan said in an article evaluating me, what I focus on is the complexity of human nature.In history, all kinds of plots have appeared, and all kinds of strangeness, unimaginability and unexpectedness of human nature have been shown. I am obsessed with observing this complexity, and I am obsessed with restoring one face after another, proudly pointing to others and saying: look , He turned out to be like this!Later, my curiosity shifted more to the laws of history itself.I began to observe the peasant uprising, the Chinese people's dream of a prosperous age, and the origin of China's autocratic system... I was surprised to find that almost all of the concepts I took for granted in my mind were inaccurate.For example, what the peasant uprising mainly promoted was not the progress of history, but the progress of the autocratic system; for example, almost all Chinese-style prosperous times were built on the basis of a great decline and ended in decline; such as those in the Spring and Autumn and Warring States periods Free-thinking people, almost all of them are calling for a unified authoritarian regime... These observations and thoughts of mine are completely wild fox Zen style, far from the "academic paradigm". My conclusion may be ridiculous and off topic, but I am enjoying myself.My writing is completely free-wheeling and free-spirited.Abandon everything, sink in the study, sort out my thoughts little by little, answer my questions, and the result is to type out an article.The feeling of concentration, simplicity and tranquility that is left alone in the world is indeed a great happiness. In this way, I entered history from a standard "literary youth".History is the foundation of the social studies, and following this path you will pass the rooms of the humanities involuntarily.Along the way, through writing, I have a deeper and broader understanding of the world.From 1996 to now, my thinking has undergone tremendous changes.My understanding of society, history, and culture has subverted myself in many aspects.And the way of this transformation process is precisely because of writing. Writing also brought me real "benefits".In the beginning, in order not to be misunderstood, I wrote underground.And after discovering that "writers" had become a different kind, I even buried the published things in the deep drawer: it was better to have no one to communicate with than those insincere and inappropriate "appreciation".Later, by chance, President Wang Yi read a few articles I wrote.Although the president does not have a high diploma, he has a wide range of interests and knowledge.More importantly, their generation also believed that writing was a big thing, a good thing.He said, you are a material for writing, and I will create a writing environment for you. So he transferred me to the sales department of the city bank, because Dong Qingyi, the director of the sales department (he died in a car accident the year before last, may he be safe and happy in heaven) is open-minded and magnanimous.With the acquiescence of him and the president, I only need to go to work one or two days a week, and during the rest of the time, I can be a serious "writer" at home.This is naturally the luck that writing brings me.Every morning at 6:30, I get up for a walk, go home, take a shower, listen to the people on the first floor being empty, make a pot of tea, press the computer, watch the tea smoke rise, and listen to the "rustle" of the computer With the sound of startup, the whole room is as quiet as an ancient tomb.At this time, I am deeply grateful to the world for being so tolerant to me.Even if the things I write can never attract attention, I will be satisfied if I can always enjoy this kind of study life.
However, the joy of writing on the other side is dissemination and communication after all.Every jade grinder hopes that his jade Guanyin can be appreciated by others.What's more, people who grew up in Mao culture have a bit of the old-fashioned idea of "writing to convey the truth". An unexpected opportunity led me to discover another way to approach readers.那是一九九九年底，我到北京出差，因为《鸭绿江》主编刘元举先生介绍，认识了时事出版社工作的沈阳人祝勇。祝勇知道我在写东西，让我发几篇给他看看。 过了几天，祝勇给我打来电话：我想给你出本书，行不行？你的水平完全可以出一本书，而且我估计书可能卖得很好。 于是，在二OOO年一月一日，我的第一本书《千年悖论》出版了，汇集了我写作初期的大部分作品，其中主要的当然是“历史文化散文”。说实话，在此之前，我从来没有考虑过出版的可能性。因为在我看来，出书实在是比在杂志上发表作品重大得多的事。在我的印象中，一个人一般要人到中年，德高望重，作品积累到一定数量了，才有可能出一本书。因此，虽然稿费只有每千字三十，虽然封面做得有点不伦不类，我还是感觉很兴奋。 这本书起印五千册，出来后很快就淹没在众多新书当中。虽然不久都卖光了，但是在读书界没有引起什么关注。 不过令我高兴的是读者却有了反馈。读者大部分都是大学生，奇怪的是，他们几乎都是在大学图书馆读到的这本书。有几个大学生给我来信说，这本书“颠覆了他们的大脑”，“千年悖论，让我们觉醒，第一次从人的角度来考虑这些历史人物的种种作为”。 我很高兴这本书能触动一些人，能让他们感受到我的愤怒、惊讶、感慨、激动，能颠覆他们对历史的一些成见：这正是我在书房里不懈敲打的目的。 我发现，出版是将自己的写作抵达读者的大路。出版的传播力比在传统文学杂志上发表要大得多，有效得多。今天的文学期刊，读者群基本已经净化为“纯文学读者”。虽然一开始我走的是“文学之路”，但其实我的作品并非标准化的“文学性写作”，我写的虽然都是历史，但是离现实可能比大部分小说都要近。它们的读者，更多在文学期刊的订阅者之外。而且最关键的一点是，出版社的编辑与文学期刊的编辑完全不同：大部分出版机构都需要赚钱养活自己，因此特别在意一本书的市场反应。与文学期刊疏离了社会不同，出版业已经相当市场化，编辑们睁大眼睛寻找每一位有读者的作家。 所以，除了第二本书的出版颇遇艰难外，我的书出版都非常顺利。特别是第三本书《大明王朝的七张面孔》出版之后。 《大明王朝的七张面孔》出版不久，我在报纸上网上很快见到了白岩松、柴静评论了这本书。影星袁莉在我经常看的《锵锵三人行》中提到了这本书，那年《艺术人生》的年终评点，张越、崔永元等几位嘉宾似乎也提到了这本书……于是我意识到这本书引起了广泛的关注。虽然出版社没有进行过一个字的宣传推广，但是这本书通过口碑相传，渐渐传播开来。印数很快就过了三万册，而在文化类书里面，据说三万册就算畅销书。再以后，我的《中国人的性格历程》、《曾国藩的正面与侧面》也陆续成为历史文化类的“畅销书”：从《大明王朝的七张面孔》起，我算是有了自己的读者群，隔三差五地收到读者来信，其中有一封是当时身在美国的留学生，后来的青年学者刘瑜的信（特别令我感动的，是一位读者将我的三万多字的《无处收留》一笔一划地抄在一个小本本上送给了我）。我能够知道，自己的写作，对一些人确实发生了影响。 让自己的写作抵达读者，我用了将近十年的时间。
在主要传播方式转为出版的同时，我的传统“作家”之路仍然自然延伸。我的一位朋友作家钟求是有一次和我通电话时说，我感觉你的东西挺适合《当代》的风格。你寄给我的朋友吴玄吧，他现在在《当代》做编辑。 我按钟求是提供的邮箱寄去了几篇稿子。一周后，吴玄打来电话，说他已经与主编洪清波达成一致意见，打算从二OO六年起，为我开一个专栏。这对我来说完全是意想不到的事。专栏的名字后来定为“史纪”。这成了我在“纯文学”领域最辉煌的“业绩”。我获得了一些省级文学奖和一项不太重要的“国家级文学奖”。对了，还有“文学创作一级”这个职称。因为这些成绩，我成为省作协的“理事”，后来又成为“主席团成员”，还成了一个市作协的“副主席”。我参加了“青创会”，并且见到了常委同志。这是我“纯文学”之路的顶峰。从一个小城市的无依无傍、赤手空拳的草根青年，到一个地级市的“作家协会副主席”，这就是我爬过的“文学之峰”的高度。 不过，整体来说，我的“纯文学”之路走得不温不火，换句话说，其实是不太成功。用某个文学前辈推心置腹的话来说，你不会经营自己。你怎么不开个研讨会，找几个有名的评论家评论一下子，给你归成一个什么文学现象。那你不就火了？ 前辈说得轻松。我知道事实并非如此简单。我的作品并非传统意义上的“纯文学”，我也没有什么过人的才气。这把火哪那么容易“点着”。 不过，他说的也并非没有一点道理。作为一个写了相当年头的作家，我对一些心照不宣的事也相当清楚：在任何领域，都没有那么多“顺理成章”。只要你的才气不足以掀翻地球，那么你就有必要“经营”一下自己。 这就是中国“圈子社会”的现实。如果有了人脉连接，你完全可以事半功倍，甚至四两拔千斤。事实上，我写作生涯的大部分“成功”，除了一开始几篇“自发投稿”是完全自我奋斗之外，其他的重要几步，也都是在人脉的连接下完成的：那篇《无处收留》最终得以在“一流刊物”上发表，毕竟是文能先生不懈推荐的结果。第一本书的出版，则是刘元举先生向老乡祝勇介绍我的副产品。《大明王朝的七张面孔》在广西师范大学出版社这样好的出版社出版，是因为在那之前认识了丁东先生，再加上章诒和先生的序。而我的《曾国藩的正面与侧面》卖得不错，柴静写的那个跋和刘瑜、老六的帮着吆喝自然功不可没……我不得不承认，“圈子”其实也是一种正常的生活状态：这个时代，信息的大海之中，你其实只能看到进入视野的这一小片儿。这在任何国家都是常理，只不过在中国社会，人们更习惯于这种“手工式”的联结。这是一个大家都在叫喊和跳跃的时代，如果想要从草根地位到达成功高度，你需要喊破嗓子，跳上桌子。 但我还是修正不了心中那个奇怪的“应该”情结。 那一天，和一个朋友聊天，屈指数起我们认识的所有文学朋友，大大小小百十来人，没开过文学性的“作品研讨会”的，只有我一个。有一次，一位对我一直很欣赏的文学活动家和我详细谈了给我开研讨会的计划，我不置可否，结果他很生气，觉得我过于“傲慢自大”，从此很少再与我来往。 我根本不是什么“清高孤介”。作为一个不善于拒绝的人，我也对别人说过很多言不由衷的话，我也请过一位文学奖的评委朋友吃过饭，我也曾画虎不成反类犬地学习过“应酬”，我也曾经很想在圈内获得“成功”，以便能获得各种相关的好处。我只是后来确定，我喜欢“舒服”多过“成功”。 作为一个读过些中国历史的人，理智上我对“人情社会”的规矩抱有高度的“同情之理解”，但是在感情上，我却无法经常地勉强自己。我是一个羞涩的人，帮我开了专栏的吴玄，我后来在一次文学会议上见到，我居然没好意思对他表达我的感谢之意。归根结底，也许是成长的背景，让我一直固执地以为有一种“应该”，有一种“清洁”。我纠正不了这个“错觉”。 坚持这种“应该”经常让我与身边的生活产生一点排异。比如虽然“名人荐书”现在已经是再常见不过的现象，我的几本书也都请他人进行过推荐，但我一直觉得推荐应该是一件严肃的事。不止一个朋友请我为其书写推荐语，我读了作品后都极力推卸了，因此得罪了好友，也只好认了。爱惜羽毛、不辜负读者对自己的信任，这一选择似乎不需要经过任何思考。 不料前些天在网上浏览时，看到一则新书的宣传文章，介绍一本马上要出版的历史类书籍。封面上印着李承鹏等四个人推荐，其中一个赫然是我的名字。更为离奇的是，封底还有“我写的”一段推荐语。而事实上，对这本书，这个作者，甚至这个编辑，都一无所知。 我致电这家我很熟悉的著名民营出版机构，问是怎么回事。编辑说张老师，那个推荐语是我写的，我忘了征求您同意了！ 我说那赶紧去掉我的名字吧，我不能推荐这本书。编辑很惊讶，说，推荐一本书也不是多大的事儿，张老师您就同意吧，请您推荐，不是说明您在读者心目中有很大影响吗？这是好事啊！我觉得那推荐语写得也不错啊！ 我费了好多口舌之后，编辑才相信我是认真的。她说，封面已经印出来了，如果更改，要损失很多钱。经她请求，出版机构的领导同意给我一笔丰厚的推荐费，以换取我不撤掉推荐。 我拒不同意。编辑又找到我的一位好友做我的工作，原来编辑是辽宁人，是我好友的同学的侄女。据说好朋友的同学为这事还专门跑了趟沈阳： 因为小编辑刚刚工作不久，如果让出版社蒙受损失，可能会失去工作。 这位朋友以前很热心地帮过我的忙。他多次打来电话，劝我想开一点。 现在推荐一本书，谁还当成多大的事呢？ 但最后，我还是拒绝了朋友的请求，坚持要求出版公司修改了封面。我的处理结果，既得罪了出版公司，又得罪了朋友，还可能使一位小编辑的前途受了影响。许多人听说这件事，都说我做得不对。 我的“心理疾病”确实令我落伍了吗？
因为现在身为清华大学历史专业的博士后，与“学术圈儿”的交往比“文学圈儿”还要多，所以我现在应该算是游离在“文学体制”的边缘，介于文学社会和普通社会之间，我发现了一个有趣的现象：在“纯文学”范围内，几乎没有人知道我出过《大明王朝的七张面孔》之类的书。而《大明王朝的七张面孔》的读者，也很少有人知道我在《当代》上开有专栏：他们很少读文学期刊。“纯文学”和“普通阅读”，几乎井水不犯河水。 作家的阅读大都固定在纯文学范围内，每一次文学圈内的会议，大家带的书，谈论的阅读，大都是最新的外国文学作品。他们的作品，也基本都在严格的“文学艺术”范围之内，致力于艺术质量。 “文学圈”远比“学术圈”更远离普通社会。每一次学术会议，那些专家学者私下交谈的，都是社会热点，大局走向，民心民生，一个个慷慨激昂。而每一次文学会议，朋友们聊的仍然是我最近又在哪本杂志上发了什么东西，哪篇被转载了，哪部作品又被列为“重点扶持”。这些作品，可能“圈外人”永远看不到。或者是某某作协里，谁和谁又打起来了，谁又偷偷把另一个人办公桌上的稿费单冲进厕所了。在某个笔会上，某某和某某划拳，以决定某个女作家今晚睡在哪里……和这个社会密切相关的唯一一点，是探讨如何把小说改编成电视剧。 我读到一些对文学体制反思的声音，我认同其中的一些说法。我和朋友们开过一些玩笑。不过，任何事情都不是小葱拌豆腐式地定义的。我在“文学圈”里遇到过许多温暖的人和温暖的瞬间，遇到过很多认真的编辑和几本敬业的杂志，让我想起“八十年代”整个社会精英与国家同方向前进时的干净清爽。比如《天涯》杂志多年前开的一次笔会。 如前所述，我的《无处收留》当初被《天涯》因为太长委婉拒绝。当它在《钟山》上发表后，《天涯》副主编李少君写来一封约稿信，说韩少功看到《钟山》上的这篇文章，批评了他，说他错过了一篇好文章。 于是我接连在《天涯》上发表了几篇东西。说实在的，《天涯》这本刊物在所有文学刊物里最适合我，因为它办得不那么“纯文学”，而是更注重思想性和杂糅性，与我的写作风格比较合拍。 2001年，我意外地得到《天涯》的邀请，年底到海南开笔会。“笔会”两个字，在文学青年时代特别令我向往，在我的幻想中，那应该是一个小团体的神仙会一样的精神会餐。大学里读文学杂志的时代，我多少次幻想自己将来也能参加“笔会”，这个梦想终于实现了。 到了海南才发现，这是一个很小规模的笔会，只有九个人。除了我，其他人都是鼎鼎大名：张承志、莫言、李陀、王晓明、翟永明、汪晖。还有主人韩少功和蒋子丹。所有的人我都是第一次见到。他们大都是我心目中的文学英雄，比如张承志的我就读过多次。我很奇怪，为什么韩少功要请我这样一个名不见经传的小人物参加这个笔会。不管怎么样，我心中难免暗自激动。 一见面，张承志就开起玩笑：“我像不像本·拉登？” 那时“九一一”刚刚过去一个多月。朝他提示的方向去感觉，是有点像。体格粗壮，大鼻大脸，眉毛又粗又长，头顶毛发已经稀疏，声音重得近乎发瓮，显然雄性激素十分发达。和想象中的把编辑从家中骂跑的孤傲不同，张承志礼貌周到，出人意料地随和。 那是我第一次到海南，感觉很新鲜。汽车沿环岛高速路行驶。山峦优美，千万株桉树见缝插针，热火朝天地竞争、拥挤、勾结、倾轧，迫不急待地生长。开会的地址是岛内的七仙岭，这是白云缭绕下的一座黛青大山，山顶七峰并立，如同七位仙人侧立。推开窗子，遍地椰树的翠叶在阳光下闪闪发光。 和这些“文学英雄”在一起，我感觉又兴奋，又舒服。他们都真实朴素而自然，他们身上，有着我想象的“八十年代气质”。这个会上聊的许多东西，现在已经没有印象了。只记得莫言对于大家在会上总是“胸怀宇宙”有他自己的看法。吃饭的时候，他端着酒杯，抿着红酒，随口编了个顺口溜： 这是一个分裂的时代，又是一个整合的时代。 这是一个破坏的年代，又是一个建设的年代。 这是乡下人进城打工的年代，又是韩少功下乡隐居的年代。 这是文学似乎能影响社会的年代，又是文学一钱不值的年代。 文学圈里，拉帮结伙的多了，孤军奋战的少了。 无耻吹捧的多了，严肃批评的少了。 自高自大的多了，谦虚谨慎的少了。 出版的作品越来越多了，好的作品越来越少了。 关心国家大事的多了，关心文学的少了。 冒充理论家的作家越来越多了，像我这样不会说话的越来越少了。 丰乳的方法越来越多了，能分泌乳汁的乳房越来越少了。 ……他一口气编完，大家都大笑。蒋子丹立刻要求，这串顺口溜要交给《天涯》，放到“作家立场”里发表。 这个笔会让我感觉到八十年代的文学热的余温。
一九九六年，当我拿起笔的时候，误以为写作能给我带来一切。转眼，写作已经十六年了。我也由大学刚毕业的青年，接近中年，人生中最美好的年华付给了书桌。抬头一看，几乎一切都已经沧海桑田。 十六年的时间已经把我身边的很多人变成了我所不认识的另一个人。我的一位朋友，当年因为自小怀抱了当作家的梦想，拒绝给当地主要领导当秘书。如果那时他从政，现在至少也当一届县长了。当年，一谈起文学，谈起社会，他总是眼含泪水。而如今，他开始沉醉于一个鸡肋一样有名无权的副处级小官职，以善于讲话和敬酒而闻名，在他偶尔批判什么的慷慨悲愤中，每一次都夹杂着自己的巧妙诉求。有一次酒后，他对我说：操，鸡巴十几年，白活了。要是让我重新活，我才不他妈当什么作家呢！ 是啊，这个世界变化太快了，事实上我们这一代人也许是中国历史上最为“沧桑”的一代：通常状态下几代人才能经历的历史变化，都压缩到我们这一代身上。应该说，有一些变化，是必然的。但是，也有一些变化是令我意外的。比如我今天在网上看到这样一则新闻： “《蔓蔓青萝》、《泡沫之夏》、《潇然梦》……今日，某大学图书馆公布其2009年秋季学期借阅书籍排行榜，前100名几乎全为网络文学书籍。据该排行榜显示，除了排名第51名的《宋氏三姐妹》和排名第100名的《最易掌握的学英语规律338条》，其余的均为在网络上曾风靡一时的网络文学作品，如《玥影横斜》、《爱在唐朝》、《失踪的王妃》等，以及郭敬明、明晓溪、安妮宝贝等青春小资文学作品。而与高校专业课程相关的书籍均无缘入榜……” 自己坐在大连市图书馆，翻读文学期刊的情景宛如昨日，读到这样的新闻，怎能让人不恍如隔世？当我恍惚的事情越来越多，比如发现整整一代人的一生精力可能被一套房子套牢。我不得不说，这个世界的走向，不是我所想象。在二十多年前，这个世界就已经转向，离我们而去。我们这些人，是最后一代“文学青年”。
现在的我，已经成了历史写作中的“资深”一员。资深的一个证据，就是作品纷纷开始再版。 想当初和广西师大贝贝特签合同的时候，因为是丁东老师引见，所以在谈合同时没有提出任何条件。书出了几年后，才发现版权期居然是八年而不是常见的五年。人们常爱用八年抗战这个词，这说明在人的感觉里，八年是一个有点长的时段。确实，在这八年里，我换了两次工作，读了一个博士，又出了四本书。但是每一次自我介绍的时候，如果只能写一本书，我还是会写《大明王朝的七张面孔》。确实，这是我最满意的一本书，也是读者们提到我时最常提起的书。 在这八年当中，有很多家出版机构提出提前再版这本书，但是原出版方一直没有同意，虽然后来在整整六年间，权版页上的印数没再被改过。这是中国出版界常见的现象之一。现在，时间到了，为了这本书给我打了无数次电话的吴怀尧开始操作这本书的再版。 这次再版最大的变化，是朱元璋一章，由原来的七万多字，扩展成近二十万字，就是说，由一篇人物随笔扩展成了一本书，一本完整的《朱元璋传》。希望它在已经出版的众多《朱元璋传》中，仍然能显现出自己的个性。 其他篇章，进行的调整比较小。现在回顾早年文字，有些地方，还闻得到青涩味道。可是，我很珍视这些文字，因为它们是不可复制的。每个生命阶段的文字质地是不一样的。虽然我的早年文字中时有“为赋新诗强说愁”的做作，但是这些文字里面，灌注着力量、激情和理想。在这些青涩的文字中，我能感觉到自己彼时的单纯，感觉到奔涌的生命能量，感觉到自己当初用大铁锤去砸蝴蝶翅膀的雄壮。