Chapter 21 Chapter 2

It was two hours before I finally got a chance to speak to Olga alone.The convivial atmosphere, however forced it seemed to Svetlana, had been transferred to the courtyard.Semyon stood by the brazier, handing out kebabs to those who wanted them, and they were cooked so quickly that one could only think of magic.There are two cases of red wine in the shade next to it. Olga and Ilya were chatting friendly, holding a skewer of roast lamb and a glass of red wine in their hands.It's a pity to break the peaceful atmosphere, but... "Olga, we need to talk," I said, going up to them.Svetlana was concentrating on arguing with Xiaohu about something—the girls were enthusiastically discussing the traditional New Year's party of the patrol team, and they switched from the hot weather to the party with a certain feminine logic .Now is the most appropriate time to talk to Olga.

"I'm sorry, Ilya," the female magician spread her hands, "Let's find time to talk, shall we? I'd like to know what you think about the reason for the disintegration of the alliance, even if your point of view is wrong." The magician smiled solemnly, and left. "Excuse me, Anton." Olga asked in the same tone. "Do you know what I'm going to ask?" "I got it." I look around.There was no one around.The atmosphere of the short-lived barbecue before was still going on, the atmosphere of eating, drinking, and no burden on the stomach and brain.

"What is waiting for Svetlana?" "The future is difficult to predict, but predicting the future of those great magicians and great female magicians is even more..." "Don't haw and haw, partner." I looked her in the eyes, "Don't. We used to be together, two people working together? You were punished and lost everything, even you body. But the punishment is just." Olga's face lost all color. "What do you know about my fault?" "all." "How do you know?" "After all, I always deal with data." "You don't have permission. What happened to me has not been entered into the electronic file."

"I judged it based on the surrounding information, Olga. Have you seen the circles of ripples on the water? The stone may have sunk to the bottom of the sea long ago, covered with a layer of silt, but there are still layers of ripples on the water. If If the stone is big, the waves will wash the slope, rubbish and foam will be washed to the river bank, and the boat will be turned upside down. The stone is really big. It can be said that I stood on the slope for a long time, Olga, I stood there, watching Waves wash over the banks." "You're bluffing." "No. Olga, what's next for Sveta? What's the next step in training?"

The sorceress, who forgot about the cooled roast lamb and the remaining half glass of wine, looked at me.Then I asked again: "You've been through this stage yourself, haven't you?" "Yes." It seemed that she didn't intend to continue playing the game of silence, "I have also experienced it, but they cultivated me slowly." "Why the haste with Sveta?" "No one thought that there would be another great female magician in this century. Gesar had to make temporary arrangements to speed up the training process." "Is that what brought you back? Not just because you did a good job?"

"Don't you understand everything!" Olga's eyes showed an unhappy look. "Why do you still have to torture me?" "Are you tracking the progress of her training? From your own experience?" "Yes. Are you satisfied?" "Olga, we are from the same camp." I whispered. "Then don't elbow your comrades!" "Olga, what's the purpose? Is there anything you can't do that Sveta should do?" "You," she said in a panic, "Anton, you are bluffing!" I didn't say anything. "You don't really know anything! Ripples on the water, you don't even know where to look to see them!"

"Even so, didn't I guess the most important part?" Olga looked at me and bit her lip.Then she shook her head and said: "You guessed it. You ask directly, I answer directly, and I won't explain anything. This is not what you should know, and it's none of your business." "you are wrong." "None of us wants to do harm to Svetlana," said Olga decisively. "Is that clear?" "We're not good at playing tricks on people. It's just that sometimes there's no difference between our good intentions and our bad intentions."

"Anton, let's stop here. I'm not authorized to answer your questions, and don't spoil someone else's rare opportunity to rest." "Why did the leave come so suddenly?" I asked mildly, "Olga?" She understood what I meant, and her expression became enigmatic.It is too mysterious for this question. "You know enough." She raised her voice in her usual commanding tone. "Olga, we have never given all of us a vacation all at once, even for a day and a night. Why did Gesar drive all the Light Envoys out of the city?" "not all."

"With the exception of Polina Vassilyevna and Andrei. You know very well that they are office workers. There is not a single inspector left in Moscow!" "The Dark Messenger also disappeared." "so what?" "Anton, that's enough." I understand that she will never say a word again.I nodded and said: "Well, Olga. Half a year ago we were equal, even though that was only by accident. Now, obviously not. Sorry, it's not my place to ask, it's not within my purview." Olga nodded.This took me by surprise and I could hardly believe my eyes.

"You finally understand." Is she making fun of me?Maybe she really believed that I had decided not to ask about it anymore? "In general, I'm still a little self-aware." I said and glanced at Svetlana: she was chatting happily with Torik. "You're not angry with me, are you?" asked Olga. I touched her hand, smiled, and went inside.I really want to do something.This desire is as strong as if I were a demon released from a bottle after being imprisoned for a thousand years.Want to do anything: build palaces, destroy cities, program in Basic, or do cross-stitch.

When I opened the door, I didn't touch it, I just pushed it in the air in the twilight world.I don't know why this is done.This rarely happens to me.Occasionally this happens when one drinks too much, or loses one's temper.But now it is obviously not in line with the first situation. There was no one in the living room.Yeah, why are you sitting in the room?At this time, there are hot roast lamb, cold beer and enough deck chairs in the yard. I "plopped" and sat on the sofa.Find yourself on the table—perhaps Sveta's poured brandy.I drank it down in one gulp, as if the glass had been filled not with fifteen-year-old "festive" wine but with cheap vodka. At this time, Xiaohu walked in. "You don't mind?" I asked. "Of course not." The female magician sat next to me, "Anton, are you in a bad mood?" "Never mind." "Did you quarrel with Sveta?" I shake my head. "no." "Anton, is there anything I'm doing wrong? Is there anything dissatisfied with my colleagues?" I stared at her in astonishment. "Xiaohu, don't think about it! Everything is fine. Everyone likes it very much." "how about you?" I've never seen a shapeshifter hesitate so much before.Like - don't like, it is impossible to satisfy everyone. "Svetlana will continue her training," I said. "Why?" The girl frowned slightly. "I don't know. For a job that Olga can't do. For a very dangerous, but at the same time very important purpose." "This is very good." She reached for the goblet, poured herself a glass, and took a sip. "Not bad?" "Yes. Training, assigning work." Xiaohu looked for something with his eyes, then frowned, and looked at the stereo by the wall. "Can't find the remote every time." The sound suddenly turned on and the indicator light came on."A Kind of Magic" by the "Queens" choir sounded.I especially admire the ability to manipulate electronic devices from a distance without hand gestures—this isn't about drilling holes in walls with your gaze, or repelling mosquitos with fireballs. "How long have you been on the patrol?" I asked. "From the age of seven. I was in combat when I was sixteen." "Nine years! It's easy for you, because your magical ability is innate. They plan to make Svetlana a great magician in half a year to a year!" "Oh...it's not easy," the girl agreed, "do you think the boss is doing something wrong?" I shrugged.It would be foolish to say the boss is wrong, like denying that the sun rises in the east.He has been learning how not to make mistakes for hundreds of years, what hundreds of years, or thousands of years.Gesar was able to act forcefully, even brutally.He can alienate the dark magician, but also sacrifice his own people.He can do anything but make no mistakes. "I think he overestimated Sveta." "Impossible! The boss miscalculated..." "Never mind, I know. He's good at old tricks." "He wants Sveta to be good," the female magician added stubbornly. "Do you understand? You may not do it according to your own will, including me, as well as Semyon and Olga. Among us Any one of us would have done otherwise. But he's the leader of the patrol, so he has every right to do it." "Is he more visionary?" I said sarcastically. "yes." "Then how is freedom?" I filled the goblet again.But the wine seemed to be superfluous, and I started to feel dizzy. "What about freedom?" "You talk like a dark messenger," the girl complained. "I prefer to think that they talk like me." "In fact, everything is very simple, Anton." Xiaohu turned to me and looked into my eyes.She smelled of brandy and a faint floral scent—not perfume, shapeshifters don't like cosmetics. "You love her." "I love it. Does that count as news?" "You know, she's going to outsmart you soon." "If not more than..." I didn't want to say this, but I remembered how easily Sveta could detect the magic barrier in the wall. "It's really more than you. You can't compare in terms of mana. Her problems are beyond your comprehension, even unfamiliar. With her, you will feel like a drag, a male whore, and then you will be entangled in the past. " "Yes." I nodded, and was surprised to find that the goblet was empty.I refilled it while the woman watched. "That is to say, I shouldn't be that kind of person, and I don't need such an ending." "But you can't help it." I hadn't expected her to be so cruel, to speak such bitter truths when she was nervously worrying about whether the food, drink, and surroundings were to everyone's taste. "I know." "Now that you know, then, Anton, that's the only reason you're mad at the boss for rushing to boost Sveta's powers." "My time is passing," I said, "like the sand in my hand and the raindrops in the sky." "Your time? It's your time, Anton." "It was never ours." "why?" yeah, why?I shrugged. "You know, some beasts don't reproduce in captivity." "Again!" the girl said angrily. "What was imprisoned? You should be happy for her. Svetlana will be the pride of the Light Forces. You were the first to discover her, and only you could save her." "Why save her? To fight the darkness again? For that unnecessary war?" "Anton, why are you talking like a dark messenger now? Don't you love her? Then don't ask for anything, don't expect her to give you something in return! This is Sveta's way!" "Where love begins, light and darkness end." The girl was too angry to make a sound.She shook her head sadly, and said grudgingly: "You should at least promise to..." "It depends on the content of the promise." "You have to be sensible and trust the old comrade." "I promise to half believe." Xiaohu sighed, and reluctantly said: "Hey, Anton, you may think that I don't understand you at all, but I don't. I didn't want to be a transformation magician. I used to have the ability to heal diseases, and it was quite good." "Really?" I looked at her in surprise.I never knew about it. "It was, it was," the girl confirmed softly, "but when I started to choose which line of magic to develop, the boss invited me. We sat down and drank tea with sweets, like Talking seriously like adults, even though I was a little girl at the time, younger than Julia. We talked about what kind of night watchmen the Light Forces need, what members of the patrol team need, and what I can achieve. In the end we decided , to develop shapeshifting abilities for combat, but that requires compromising all other abilities. I didn't like it very much at first. You know, how painful it is to shapeshift?" "Become a tiger?" "No, it's okay to become a tiger, but it's hard to recover. But I endured it because I believed in the boss, because I knew it was the right thing to do." "what about now?" "Now I'm very happy," the girl replied enthusiastically, "I couldn't have imagined that what I'm doing now is better than the abilities I've been deprived of—herbs, spells, damage to spirits, dispelling black whirlwinds and Gu arts, etc. It makes me more satisfied." "But you now face blood, pain, fear, death," I said in the same tone, "while fighting in reality and two or three layers of twilight, dodging fire, drinking blood, and even squeezing through copper pipes .” "This is war." "Probably so. But shouldn't you be fighting at the front?" "Then who should it be? If it weren't for this, I wouldn't have this house." Xiaohu pointed to the living room and said, "You know, you can't make a lot of money from medical treatment. If you go all out to treat people, no one will Killing without stopping." "It's a nice place," I agreed. "Do you stay here often?" "It depends." "I guess you don't come here very often. You're constantly on watch, breaking into the most dangerous places." "This is the path I've chosen." I nod.Actually, what am I.I say: "Yes, you're right. I'm probably tired. I'm talking nonsense." Xiaohu looked at me suspiciously, she was obviously surprised that I gave up so quickly. "I'll sit with champagne for a while," I added, "drink it all by myself, then sleep under the table and wake up groggy. It'll be easier then." "Okay," said the sorcerer alertly. "Why are we here? The bar is open, you can choose any drink that suits your taste, or go find someone else, want me to sit with you for a while?" "No, I'd better be alone," I said, patting the pot-bellied bottle. "Damn, no appetizers and no company. Stop by when you go swimming, maybe I'll be able to move then." Woolen cloth?" "We agreed." She smiled and walked out of the room.I stayed alone, if not counting the bottle of Armenian brandy as my companion, which I sometimes like to believe to be my companion. She is a lovely girl.They were all lovely girls, friends and colleagues of my patrol team.I can hear their voices through the music of "Queen" now, and I feel very happy.I am on better terms with some of them and less with others, but I have no enemies, and never shall have any.We have fought together in the past, and we will walk together in the future. There is only one reason for us to lose each other. So why am I unhappy with what happened?I was the only one—whether Olga or Xiaohu agreed with the boss's actions.As for the others, if you ask them directly, they will agree. Am I really losing my objectivity? Maybe. I took a sip of brandy and glanced through the twilight, tracking the dim firelight of some indistinguishable life that was not my kind. It turned out that there were three mosquitos in the living room, two flies, and a spider under the ceiling in the corner. I moved my fingers and squeezed out a small fireball with a diameter of two millimeters.I took aim at the spider - it's best to choose a stationary target for relaxation - and sent a fireball. There is nothing immoral about my actions.We are not Buddhists, at least most of the rest of Russia is not.We eat meat, we fight mosquitoes and flies, we poison cockroaches, and if we don't bother to learn new spells every month that will scare insects away, insects will quickly develop immunity to magic. This has nothing to do with morality, it's just that it's ridiculous and will become the butt of everyone's laughing stock. "Fireballs against Mosquitoes" is a favorite game for beginners of all ages who train with the Night's Watch Patrol.I think dark magicians play this kind of game, too, but not only with flies and mosquitoes, but also with sparrows and dogs. I burned a spider in one go, and had no problem killing sleepy mosquitoes. I celebrated every victory by clinking brandy glasses and willing bottles.Then I started hitting flies.But maybe there was a little too much alcohol in the blood, maybe the flies sensed the approach of the fire very sensitively, and it cost me four fire bombs to hit the first fly, but luckily I dispelled them in time when I missed the target.I killed the second fly with the sixth bullet, and at the same time two small balls of lightning shot into the glass case on the wall. "Oops," I said, ruefully gulping down the brandy.I stood up and the room shook.I went to the closet, and there were some swords wrapped in black velvet.At first glance, it was made in Germany in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries.The auxiliary lights were turned off, so I can't give a more precise estimate of their age.I found a few small craters in the glass, but fortunately the sword was not damaged. I took some time to consider how to remedy this mistake, but I could think of no better way than to send back the shards of glass which had evaporated and scattered all over the room.It had to take much more effort than restoring the whole piece of glass to finally restore it to its original shape. Then I went into the bar.I don't know why I don't want to drink brandy anymore.A small bottle of Mexican coffee liqueur, however, seemed to be a successful compromise between satisfying my need for a drink and keeping my spirits up.Coffee and alcohol - all in one small bottle. I turned around and saw Semyon sitting on the sofa chair I had been sitting on. "Everyone has gone to the lake," said the magician. "Right now," I agreed as I walked towards him, "I'll be right there." "Put down the bottle." Xie Miao suggested. "Why?" I thought it was funny, but I put the bottle down anyway. Semyon stared intently into my eyes.I didn't have time to activate the protective cocoon, and by the time I started to suspect he was up to something, it was too late.I wanted to look away, but couldn't. "Bad guy." I exhaled, bending my body deeply at the same time. "Go along the corridor to the right!" Semyon called from behind.His gaze was still fixed on my back, dragging behind like an invisible thread. I go to the bathroom.About five minutes later, my tormentor came over. "feel better now?" "Yes." I replied, struggling to breathe.I stood and stuck my head into the sink.Xie Miao turned on the tap silently, patted me on the shoulder and said: "Relax. We'll start with folk methods, but..." A wave of heat passed through his body.I moaned, but no more nausea.The symptoms of deliriousness have passed, and now the last hangover is gone from me. "What are you doing?" I just squeezed the words out. "I'm helping your liver. Drink some water and you'll feel better." It does work. I walked out of the bathroom by myself five minutes later, sweaty, wet, flushed, but wide awake. "Why meddle in your own business? I just wanted to get drunk, so I got drunk." "Young man," Semyon shook his head reproachfully, "trying to get himself drunk! Who would get himself drunk with brandy? And after drinking red wine, and drinking half a liter in half an hour. Remember One time Sasha Kuplin and I decided to drink enough..." "Who is Sasha?" "Oh, that's the writer. But he wasn't a writer then. We had a civilized drink in the common man's way, drank through the clouds, danced on the table, shot the ceiling, and got women." "Is he also the Other?" "Sasha? No, he's a nice guy. We drank a quarter and taught a bunch of high school kids how to drink champagne." I slumped down on the couch, stared at the empty bottle, swallowed, and started feeling nauseous again. "Did you get drunk after drinking a quarter of a bottle?" "A quarter of a barrel, why not drunk?" Semyon said in amazement. "It's all right to get drunk, Anton. If you really need it. But if you want to get drunk, you have to drink vodka. Brandy, red wine—it's all there." It's a psychological need." "Why drink vodka?" "To soothe the soul. When it hurts terribly." He looked at me with a slightly reproachful look, a ridiculous little magician with a somewhat funny face, with ridiculously small memories of great men and great battles. "I was wrong," I admitted, "thanks for your help." "What nonsense, old-fashioned. I once woke up a man with your name three times in one night. Alcohol is for drinking, but not drunk, for the cause." "The namesake? Anton Chekhov?" I asked in surprise. "No, what are you talking about. It's another Anton, our man. He died, in the Far East, the Japanese warlord at that time..." Xie Miao waved his hand and stopped talking.Then he said in an almost gentle tone, "Don't worry. We'll have a civilized drunken night too. But now we should catch up with our colleagues. Let's go, Anton." I obediently followed Semyon out of the house.Then I saw Sveta.She had changed and sat on the deck chair in a bathing suit and flowered skirt—or a piece of cloth wrapped around her thighs. "Are you okay?" She asked me a little surprised. "Nothing at all. But eating kebabs doesn't do any good." Svetlana looked at me carefully.However, apart from my flushed face and wet hair, there was no sign of drunkenness on me. "Should check your stomach." "Everything is normal," said Semyon quickly. "Believe me, I have also studied medicine. The hot weather, the sour wine, the greasy roast mutton—all these are the reasons for his discomfort. He is going to wash now." Take a bath, and when the weather cools down in the evening, we can drink another bottle, which is also a cure." Sveta got up and came over, looking sympathetically into my eyes. "How about we just sit here for a while? I'll pour a cup of hot tea." Yeah, that might be fine, it's fine to just sit like that, and the two of you drink tea, talk, or don't talk at all, it doesn't matter.I can look at her occasionally, or not at all.Listen to her breathe -- or plug her ears.Just know that the two of us are sitting side by side.Just the two of us, not in the friendly group of the Night's Watch Patrol.The two of us were together because we wanted it that way, not because Gesar arranged it. Am I really not going to laugh anymore? I shook my head and forced a timid and stubborn smile on my face: "Let's go, I'm not a veteran who has made great achievements in the magic war. Let's go, Sveta." Semyon was already ahead, but for some reason I felt him wink and wink approvingly. The nights are not cool, but they are no longer hot.From six or seven o'clock the people were divided into small gangs.The indefatigable Ignat was still sitting by the lake with Lena and Olga, although Olga was strangely present with them.Xiaohu and Yulia are walking in the woods.Others were scattered in various corners of the house. Semyon and I occupied the large balcony on the second floor.It was cozy, breezy, and furnished with a set of wicker chairs, a treasure on the hottest days. "Here's the first bottle," said Semyon, and took out a bottle of vodka, Smirnoff, from a plastic bag with advertisements for "Danone-Kids" yoghurt. "Are you really suggesting this?" I asked skeptically.I don't consider myself a vodka drinker. "I've been drinking vodka for over 100 years. It used to be poor, trust me." After the bottle he produced two polygonal glasses, a two-liter jar with a tin lid and stuffed with small melons, and a bag of pickled cabbages. "What to drink with?" I asked. "You don't need to drink vodka with other things, boy," Semyon shook his head, "only use fake wine." "Live and learn……" "You'll learn it sooner. Don't be suspicious of vodka. The new village of Hegolovka is the area I supervise. There is a wizard in the factory there, a little wizard. He is not a bad person. All he gives me is authentic products. " "You are exchanging rights for petty profits." I said boldly. "I didn't. I paid him. Everything is legal. This is our personal friendship and has nothing to do with the patrol team's business." Xie Miao unscrewed the bottle cap with dexterous movements and poured half a glass of wine for everyone.The vodka was cool despite being on the balcony all day. "Shall I drink to my health?" I suggested. "Too early to drink to health, toast to us." During the day he sobered me up, and did a really good job of presumably helping me get not only the alcohol out of the blood, but all the metabolites as well.I drank half a glass without shaking at all, and found it strange that vodka can make people feel good not only in cold winters, but also in hot summers. "Look." Xie Miao made a noise proudly, and sat lazily and comfortably with his hands and feet stretched out. "It should hint to Xiaohu that it would be nice to have a deck chair here." He took out his choking Java cigarette and smoked it.He noticed my dissatisfied gaze and said: "I'm still going to smoke it. I love my country." "I love my body," I muttered. Xie Miao chuckled. "Once, a foreigner I knew invited me to be a guest..." he began. "A long time ago?" I asked involuntarily. "Not so long ago, just last year. He invited me to learn to drink like a Russian. He stayed at the 'Pante' luxury hotel. I took a casual girlfriend with me, and her brother—he Just came back from prison and had nowhere to go, so we went together." I imagined the situation, shook my head and said: "Did they let you in?" "yes." "You used magic?" "No, foreign friends paid for it. He prepared plenty of wine and side dishes, and we drank from April 30th until May 2nd. We didn't let the waiter in, and we didn't turn on the TV." Looking at Semyon in the soft domestic checkered shirt, frayed Turkish jeans and worn Czech flats, it is easy to imagine him drinking from a three-liter jug, but it is impossible to imagine him Live in "Pante" look. "Indecent," I said sympathetically. "No, why is it risqué? The kid loved it. He said he finally knew what real Russian binge drinking was like." "What does it look like?" "When you wake up in the morning, everything around you is gray. The air is gray, the sun is gray, the city is gray, the people are gray, your thoughts are gray. And the only way to do that is to keep drinking. That will Feel lighter, and the world will be in color again." "You met an interesting foreigner." "of course!" Xie Miao poured another glass of wine, this time slightly less.He thought for a while, then suddenly filled his glass again. "Let's do it, old-fashioned! Cheers to the blue skies, yellow suns, and colorful cities we can see without drinking. You and I often go into the twilight world and see the world The inside story doesn't really look what everyone else thinks it does. But you know, there's probably more than one inside story in the world. Let's drink to the bright colors!" I foolishly drank half a glass. "Don't be idle, boy," Semyon said in the same tone as before. I drank the remaining half glass too. "Crackling" took a big mouthful of sweet and sour cabbage, and then asked: "Xie Miao, why do you behave like this? Why do you show behavior and image that are different from ordinary people?" "It's too profound, I can't understand it." "Why exactly?" "It's easier this way, Anton. Everyone has their own way. Me too." "What should I do, Semyon?" I asked, without explaining my problem to him. "Do what needs to be done." "What if I don't want to do what I'm supposed to do? What if our glorious truth, our sincere oath of our patrol, and our very good intentions don't please me?" "There is one thing you need to understand, Anton." The magician chewed the cucumber "click-click", "You should have understood it a long time ago, but you have stayed in your own cage for a long time. No matter how great and powerful our truth is Sublime, it's still made up of lots and lots of little truths. Even if Gesar was brilliant and had the kind of experience that I hope don't make me dream of, he still had hemorrhoids that were later magically healed, and he had Dipus complex, and the habit of reinventing successful old plans...but all of these are examples, I have not caught him, after all, a leader is a leader." He took out another cigarette, but this time I dared not object. "The problem with you, Anton, is that you are a young lad who joins the Patrol and is happy about it. The whole world is finally divided into black and white! The human ideal is fulfilled, who is good and who is Bad guy, it's clear from now on. But you see, it's not like that, not at all. We were all one family, the dark ones, the light ones. We sat around the campfire in the cave , watching through the twilight world the mammoths grazing in which pasture nearby, singing and dancing shooting sparks from their fingers, and burning other tribes with fireballs. There are two brothers, who are others, as a typical example. The one who walked into the twilight world first, maybe he was full at the time, maybe he was in love for the first time. The other guy was just the opposite, because he had a stomachache from eating too much green bamboo shoots, and the woman suffered from headaches and scraping animals. Pisha was tired and refused him on the pretext of being tired. It happened like this. One bred mammoths and was very content; divided into dark forces and light forces, divided into good guys and bad guys. This is the introductory course of the other, isn't it? That's how we teach the little other. Just, old-fashioned, who told you that this has stopped ?” Semyon jerked up the creaking couch, moved it towards me, and said: "What was, is and will continue to be. Forever, Anton, it won't end. Now we're sending people into Twilight who go out and do good in the crowd without permission. A balance breaker, a psychopath, and a hysterical patient, but what will happen tomorrow? After a hundred years, a thousand years? Who can foresee it? You, me, or Gesar?" "Therefore..." "Do you have your own truth, Anton? Tell me, do you? Do you believe it? Then believe it, don't believe mine, and don't believe Gesar's. Believe and fight for it. If you have Courage enough, if your heart doesn't pierce. Freedom from dark powers, it's not bad because it's totally independent of others - that's an interpretation for kids. Freedom from dark forces is first To liberate yourself, to let go of the constraints on your conscience and your soul. When nothing can hurt your heart anymore - and by then, when you cry out for help, it's too late, to be honest." He fell silent, took out another bottle of vodka from the plastic bag, sighed and said: "The second bottle. You know, we can't get drunk today, we can't get drunk... And about Olga, and what she said..." Why is he so clear about everything? "She doesn't envy Svetlana for what she can't; she doesn't envy that Svetlana has a lot of future, while Olga, frankly, has only past. She's jealous of you Right next to Svetlana, and wanting to stop a loved one from taking risks, even though you can't do anything. Gesar can do it, but he doesn't want to. You can't do it, but you want to. Maybe there's nothing in the end差别，但不知为什么她被触动了，她的心都要碎了，别看她的年龄那么大了。” “你知道他们为什么要培养斯维特兰娜吗？” “是的。”谢苗把酒杯中的酒溅洒了出来。 "why?" “我不能回答。我立了誓约，不能说的。” “谢苗……” “我说——我立过誓约。你要我脱下衬衫让你看背上惩罚之火的印记吗？我要是顺嘴胡说，我就会连同这把椅子一起被烧成灰烬，骨灰被卷在香烟纸里。对不起了，安东。别打听了，能说的我都说了。” “谢谢，”我说，“我们喝酒吧，说不定我们能喝醉，我需要喝醉。” “看得出来，”谢苗附和道，“来吧。”