Chapter 13 Chapter 2

I walked out of the office and stood for a while, resisting the temptation to go back. I can reject the boss's plan at any time.Should I go back?Just say a few words—Olga and I can return to our original bodies.Lo and behold, after only half an hour of talking, he'd convinced me to agree to a body change--saying it was the only realistic response to the sowing schemes of the dark powers. After all, it is absurd to give up eating because of choking. The key to Olga's house is in my little handbag.Also in the bag were some money in a small purse, cosmetics, handkerchiefs, sanitary napkins - just why would I want something I don't need - and an unopened packet of Hopping, A comb, change at the bottom of the bag, a small mirror, a small mobile phone...

And the empty pockets of my jeans gave me the feeling that I had accidentally lost something.I dug in my pant pockets for a while, trying to find even a long-lost coin, but I was finally convinced that, like most women, Olga carried everything in her handbag. Empty pockets, it seems, were by no means the source of the biggest sense of loss I've had all day today.However, this detail still caused my dissatisfaction.I took some bills out of my small handbag and pocketed them, feeling a bit more confident. It's a pity that Olga didn't bring a player... "Hi," Garico said, walking up to me. "Is the boss free?"

"He...he and Anton..." I replied. "What happened, Olga?" Garico looked at me carefully.I don't understand what he's feeling: the unfamiliar tone, the hesitant movement, the new bioelectric field.However, even if they are members of the combat team, as long as they have no special contact with me or Olga, even if they are aware of our sneaky exchange behavior--that doesn't matter to me. Just then, Garico smiled uncertainly and timidly.This was totally unexpected: I had never noticed that Garico tried to flirt with a female member of the patrol team.He is rarely acquainted with human women, and he is very unlucky in matters of love.

"It's nothing, I had a little argument." Without saying goodbye, I turned and walked towards the stairs. Boss quarreling with someone, it's Night's Watch news - I'm just in case, if there's a spy among us!Although, as far as I know, this kind of thing happened only once or twice in the whole history of the patrol, but what if... Let everyone think that Boris Ignatievich Get into a fight with your old friend. Know that there is a reason for doing this, and a good reason.Imprisoned in his office for a hundred years, unable to appear as a human, partially rehabilitated, but lost most of his magic powers, has every reason to complain... at least I don't have to pretend to be the boss's girlfriend, otherwise it would be too much up.

While I was thinking, I had reached the third floor.I must admit that Olga has made my life as easy as possible.Today she wore jeans instead of a normal blouse or skirt, and trail shoes instead of high heels.Even the body exudes a faint, rather than intoxicating smell. Long live androgynous fashion, even if it was invented by gays... I know what I should do now, and how I should do it.But this is difficult after all.I turned the corner, and instead of heading for the exit, I walked into the usual, quiet corridor next to it. I'm drowning in memories. Everyone said that the hospital had a characteristic and unforgettable smell.Of course there are.This is not surprising, as it would be if there were no smell of bleach and pain, thermometers and wounds, public underwear and bad-tasting food.

But where do the distinctive smells of schools and colleges come from? Only some subjects are taught in the headquarters building of the patrol team.Some subjects are more conveniently taught at night in the morgue, where we have our own people.Some subjects are taught locally and others are taught abroad, during tours paid for by the Patrol.While I was studying, I traveled to Haiti, Angola, the US and Spain. After all, however, only the Patrol's territory, the building covered from foundation to roof with magic and warding spells, was suitable for some lessons.Thirty years ago, when the Patrol moved into the building, three classrooms were fitted out, each for fifteen people.I still don't understand what is more in this scale: the optimism of the staff, or more than enough space.I learned a lot while I was studying, but even so, we had enough for one classroom, and half the classroom was empty.

The Patrol currently trains four Others.The only thing I have firm faith in is Svetlana, convinced that she will join our ranks and break away from ordinary human life. It was empty, empty and quiet in here.I walked slowly down the corridor, peeking now and then into empty classrooms that would be the envy of even the most secure and prosperous colleges.Next to each desk is a portable laptop, in each room there is a giant projection TV, the bookcases have bent shelves...if a historian, normal historian and not historical speculation How good it would be for Molecule to read these books... They will never see these books.

In some books there is too much truth, in others too little lie.It's something people don't need to read, and it's for the sake of their peaceful lives.Let them live with the history they are used to. At the end of the corridor is a large mirror that blocks an entire wall.I squinted at the mirror: a beautiful young woman was pacing in the hallway with her legs dangling. I stumbled and almost fell to the floor—Olga couldn't change the center of gravity of my body despite everything she could do to lighten my load.When I completely forget about my appearance, everything goes more or less normally, and the inertia of motion kicks in naturally.But as soon as I look at myself from the side - my feet are out of order, even the breathing becomes someone else's, the air seems to be entering the lungs in a different way.

I headed for the last glass door.Carefully peering in. The class is just over. As soon as I saw Polina Vasilyevna standing by the exhibition stand, I understood that today they were learning everyday magic.Polina was one of the oldest women on the patrol—her age was not apparent from her appearance.She was discovered and inspired at the age of sixty-three.Who would have guessed that an old crone who made extra money by divination with cards in the difficult post-war years would have some special gifts?And it is a very important endowment, although it is also a narrow endowment. "Now, if you need to, get dressed quickly," Polina Vasilyevna taught, "you can do it in a few minutes. But don't forget to check beforehand, How much strength is enough, otherwise it will be very embarrassing."

"When the clock strikes twelve, your carriage will turn into a pumpkin," exclaimed a young man sitting next to Svetlana.I knew this guy from the second or third day of class, but I didn't like him at first. "Exactly!" said Polina Vasilyevna, who met with similar witticisms on every desk of the students, with great joy, "fairy tales tell lies as much as statistics tell! But sometimes a little truth can be found in it." She picked up from the table her carefully pressed, elegant but slightly dated evening dress.Presumably James Bond wore this evening dress to social occasions.

"When will it become old clothes again?" Svetlana said seriously. "In two hours," Polina said simply.She hung her evening gown on the hanger and returned to the podium. "Not particularly nervous." "How long will this dress last in this respectable state? How long at most?" "About a day and night." Svetlana nodded, then suddenly looked in my direction.She sensed me coming, smiled and waved.Everyone sees me now. "Come in, ma'am." Polina bowed her head. "It is our great honor to have you here." Yes, she knows something about Olga that I don't.We all know only part of the truth about Olga, and only the boss knows everything about her. I walked in, summoning up the courage to try and take small, graceful steps, but couldn't.Sitting with Svetlana was a young man, about fifteen years old, who had been in the elementary magic class for half a year, and a tall, thin Korean who looked to be in his thirties. years old, or forty years old.They all looked at me, all interested.The whole air of secrecy surrounding Olga, all the gossip and hesitation, had to do with the fact that she had been the chief's loyal lover long ago... This fact aroused a very definite reaction among the men of the patrol. . "Hello," I said, "I'm not in your way, am I?" I was concentrating on using parts of speech correctly and not on tone of voice.As a result, the usual question becomes uncomfortable and inexplicable, as if the question is directed at every staff member present.A young boy covered in acne looked at me intently. The young man swallowed. Only the North Korean remained outwardly composed. "Olga, do you have something to say to the students?" Polina asked with interest. "I want to speak to Sveta." "Everyone else, leave the get out of class," said the old woman. "At any rate, Olga, you'd better come and see me during your study hours. My lessons are no substitute for your experience." "Sure," I promised generously. "In three days." Let Olga be responsible for my promise, but I am forced to be responsible for her sexiness. I walked towards the exit together with Svetlana, three pairs of greedy eyes fixed on my back, to be precise... not exactly the back. I know that Olga and Svetlana are very close.On that fateful night, the two of us alone, I confessed to her the truth of the world, about the Other, the Forces of Light and the Forces of Darkness, the Patrol, and the Twilight.At dawn, she took my hand and went through the closed door to the Night's Watch Patrol Combat Command.Since then, I've known.Yes, Svetlana and I are connected by a mysterious thread, and our destinies are inseparably linked.But I know, know very well, that this is temporary.Svetlana will be far ahead, and I will not be able to reach where she is going. Even if I become a first-level magician at that time, I will not be able to change this gap.Destiny binds us together, tightly together, but only so far in due time.And now Svetlana and Olga became friends at once, although I was skeptical about friendship between women.But fate did not connect them together, they were free. "Olga, I'm waiting for Anton." Svetlana grabbed my hand.This is not the gesture of the younger sister grabbing the older sister in search of support and confidence, it is the gesture of two equals.If Olga allows Svetlana to express herself on an equal footing - that means she really has a big future ahead of her. "No need," I said, "Sveta, no need." Again there is something wrong with the structure or intonation of the sentence.Now Svetlana was looking at me in bewilderment, but exactly the same as Gariko's. "I'll explain everything to you," I said, "not now, and not here, but at your house." The protective equipment in her room was not sloppy at all, and the inspection team spent too much energy on this new colleague.The boss didn't argue with me whether I could tell Svetlana everything, he just insisted on one thing: it should all happen in her home. "Okay." The strange look in Svetlana's eyes didn't disappear, but she nodded in agreement. "Are you sure you don't have to wait for Anton?" "Absolutely," I said, without playing any tricks. "Shall we call a car?" "Are you walking today?" fool! I completely forgot that Olga thought the sports car the boss had given her was better than all other means of transport. "I mean, shall we go in the car together?" I asked, knowing that I looked like an idiot.No, worse: a female idiot. Svetlana nodded.The look of doubt in her eyes grew stronger. Fortunately, I can drive.I never expected to experience the dubious joys of owning a car in a metropolis of millions with bad roads, but the curriculum of our training course included a lot of it.Some things are taught by ordinary means, and some things are magically infused into consciousness.I was taught to drive like a normal person, but if an accident happened and I was thrown into the cockpit of a plane or helicopter, the skills that were magically injected into my consciousness would be activated automatically, at least in theory That's right. I found the car keys in my handbag.An orange car waited in the parking lot in front of the building, under the watchful eyes of guards.The doors are closed, but the roof of the car is lowered, which seems a bit ridiculous. "Do you drive?" Svetlana asked. I nodded silently.I sat at the steering wheel and started the motor.As I recall, Olga started very fast, but I wouldn't. "Olga, what's wrong with you?" Svetlana finally decided to speak her mind. I nodded as I drove towards Leningrad Avenue. "Sveta, I'll wait until you have anything to say." She fell silent. I'm not a good driver.We drove a long way, longer than we should have been.But Svetlana didn't ask anything, she sat, leaned back, and looked straight ahead.Either brooding, or looking through the twilight world, twice in the traffic jam someone tried to speak to me from a neighboring car—and must have been the most expensive one.It seems that whether our appearance is good or our cars are good, there is an invisible distance that not everyone will make up their minds to cross.The glass windows were lowered, and a few short-cropped heads poked out, and sometimes a hand holding a mobile phone stuck out like the usual marker.I was just upset at first, then ridiculous.In the end I didn't pay attention to what happened, and like Svetlana, I didn't pay attention to it. I wondered, did this attempt at acquaintances please Olga? Probably will.After decades in a non-human body...after solitary confinement in a glass case. "Olga, why did you take me away? Why didn't you want to wait for Anton?" I shrugged my shoulders and really wanted to answer: "Because he is here, beside you." This temptation is really great.Besides, the chances of following us are generally few.The car is also covered in a safety spell, and I feel part of the spell, and part of it is beyond my ability. But I hold back. Svetlana has yet to pass the intelligence security course, which begins after three months of training.In my opinion, this course should have been taught earlier, but it will take time to develop an individual teaching plan suitable for each of its characteristics. After Svetlana had passed this test, she would learn to be silent, to speak.This is the easiest and at the same time the hardest course.You will be given information at the beginning, and the portions are strictly controlled and arranged according to a certain program.Part of what you hear is the truth, and part of it is a lie.Some things are told to you openly and freely, some things are told to you in strict secrecy, and some things you "accidentally" learned, overheard, or overheard. Everything you've been told will linger in your body, causing pain and fear, the desire to rush outside, tearing your heart apart, demanding a response, urgent and reckless.All sorts of nonsense will be told to you in lectures that, in general, are not necessary for the life of the other.Because, the main test and training takes place in your heart. It's rare to actually make a fool of yourself here.After all, this is training, not an exam.The height set for everyone is something he can surpass, of course, under the condition of doing his best, of course, after leaving patches of fur and blood on the barbed wire fence. But when someone who is really close to you, or even just someone you like, goes through this lesson, you start to feel broken and torn to pieces.You sense strange eyes on you, and you wonder what your friend has learned within the scope of the training session?What kind of truth did you learn?What kind of lies did you learn? What can the trainee learn about themselves, about the world around them, about their parents and friends? Then he will have a terrible, intolerable desire—the desire to help, to explain, to suggest, to instruct. But no one who passes this course will be dominated by this desire.Because what you have to learn is to suppress your desires, even if you suffer for it.This way you can learn when to speak and what to say. All in all, everything can and should be said.Pick your time right though, or telling the truth can be worse than telling a lie. "Olga?" "You'll understand," I said, "but wait." After a peek through the twilight world, I pulled the car forward and got in between an ugly jeep and an army truck.When it hit the side of the truck, the mirror snapped and folded—I didn't care.The car passed the intersection first, and the car tires made a "creaking" sound at the turn, and then sped towards the "enthusiasm" road. "Does he love me?" Svetlana asked suddenly. "Does he love me or not? Surely you know that?" I shuddered a bit, the car shook, but Svetlana didn't mind it.I feel that this is not the first time she has asked this question.The conversation she had had with Olga was obviously serious and fruitless. "Perhaps he loves you?" It's over.Now I can't be silent. "Anton was good to Olga." I spoke in the third person about myself and the mistress of my body.It was intentional, but it almost sounded like cold politeness that was rejected thousands of miles away. "Fighting friendships. That's all." If she asks Olga questions, as she does me, it will be difficult not to lie. But Svetlana was silent.After a while, she touched my hand, as if asking my forgiveness. Now I can't help but ask: "Why don't you ask?" She said easily and without hesitation: "I don't understand. Anton behaves strangely. At times he seems ecstatic about me. At other times I seem to him just one of many others he knows. Comrade in battle." "The knot of fate." I replied simply. "what?" "You haven't experienced this, Sveta." "Then explain it!" "You will understand," I drove the car faster and faster, which is probably the inertial reaction of Olga's body, "you will understand, when he comes to your house for the first time..." "I know, I have been hinted, he said." Svetlana replied firmly. "That's not the problem. When you know the truth, the suggestion is cancelled. When you learn to read fate—and you will, and you will learn it much better than I do—you will understand." "It is said that destiny is fickle." "Fate is fickle. Anton came to you knowing that if he succeeded he would fall in love with you." Svetlana was silent for a while.I could feel her cheeks flushed a little, but maybe it was just the wind in the convertible. "So what?" "Do you know what predestined love is?" "Isn't it always like this?" Svetlana even trembled with anger. "When people are in love, when people are looking among thousands and millions... that's always been fate!" So, I felt that she was that innocent girl who had begun to disappear, and the only thing she could hate was herself. "No, Sveta, have you ever heard the analogy: love—it's a flower?" "yes." "Flowers can be cultivated, Sveta. They can be bought, or others will give them away." "Has Anton bought it?" "No," I said, perhaps speaking too bluntly. "He received it as a gift, a gift of fate." "So what? What if it's love?" "Sveta, the cut flowers are beautiful, but they don't live long. Even if they are cared for and placed in a glass vase filled with fresh water, they will wither." "He's afraid of loving me," said Sveta thoughtfully. "Is that so? I'm not afraid, because I don't know it." I dodge among the temporarily parked cars towards a house.Most of the cars are "Zhiguli" and "Moscovite".civilian area. "Why did I tell you all this?" asked Svetlana. "Why did I ask for an answer? How did you know the answer, Olga? Just because you are four hundred and forty-three years old?" Hearing this number, I shuddered all over.Yes, rich life experience.Extremely rich. Olga will have a unique birthday next year. I would like to believe that my body will remain in such a beautiful physical form, if only for a quarter of its age. "Let's go." I park the car and leave it alone.It would never occur to man to steal it anyway, and protective spells are more reliable than any siren.Silently and solemnly, I went up the stairs with Svetlana to her apartment. Certainly something has changed here.Svetlana quit her job, but her fellowship and the "stipend" she received for being Other far outweighed the doctor's meager income.She changed the TV, I just don't understand when she has time to watch it.The television was luxurious, widescreen and too big for her residence.It's really satisfying to see this unexpected awakening to a better life.At first this longing will appear in everyone's mind, probably like a defensive reaction.At a time when the world around us is about to crumble, when old fears and anxieties are about to disappear and something else, unknown and vague, is about to take their place, each of us begins to realize something in our lives that didn't seem so long ago. The ideal of big reality.Some people hang out in some restaurants, some people buy expensive cars, and some people wear Parisian haute couture.It doesn't last long, and it's not because you won't be a Patrol millionaire.It's just that the need that was so urgent yesterday began to disappear and become a thing of the past.never again. "Are you Olga?" Svetlana looked into my eyes. I sighed, pulled myself together and said: "I'm not Olga." There was a moment of silence. "I can't say it at first, only here. Your house is protected from the surveillance of dark powers." "'cannot'?" She grasped the essence at once. "No," I repeated. "This is just Olga's body." "Are you Anton?" I nod. How absurd we appear now! How nice, Svetlana is used to nonsense! She believed it all at once. "Bastard!" The tone in which she said this was very much like the lady Olga.Next I got a slap in the face, which was from the same opera. I don't feel pain, but I feel wronged. "Why?" I asked. "Because you overheard other people's conversations!" Svetlana said in one breath. Her words came out hastily, but I understood.At the same time, Svetlana raised her other hand, and I ignored the Christian commandment (hit your left cheek, give him your right cheek too) and dodged the second slap. "Sveta, I promised to protect this body." "But I don't!" Svetlana sighed deeply, bit her lip, her eyes lit up.I had never seen her so furious, nor had I even thought it was possible for her to be.What was it that made her so angry? "So you're afraid of falling in love with a plucked flower?" Svetlana approached me slowly. "I see, isn't it?" It's my turn.I didn't tell the truth right away. "Go away! Go away!" I stepped back, leaning my back against the door.But I should stop, like Svetlana.She shook her head and said without thinking: "You stay in this body! It's perfect for you, you're not a man, you're a wimp!" I am silent.I am silent because I have seen what the future holds.I realize how the lines of probability can unravel before us, how ridiculous fates can weave their own paths. When Svetlana suddenly lost her fighting spirit and covered her face with her hands and cried, when I put my arms around her shoulders and she lay on my shoulders and cried as she wanted, I felt empty and cold inside, bitingly cold .I seem to be standing on the snow-covered roof again, facing the cold wind. Svetlana is still human.There are too few characteristics of the other in her, she does not understand, does not see how the road we are destined to walk extends far away, and does not see how this road diverges in different directions. Love is happiness, but only when you believe it will last forever.Even if it's a lie every time, faith alone can give love strength and joy. And Svetlana whimpered on my shoulder. The more knowledge the more sorrow.How I wish I hadn't known the inevitable future!Don't know—you can love without hesitation like ordinary mortals. But anyway, it's always a pity that I'm not in my body right now. From the looks of others, it seems that two sincere girlfriends decided to spend this peaceful night together, watching TV, sipping tea with jam, and drinking a bottle of pure wine, talking about three eternal topics: men are nothing , no clothes to wear, but more importantly how to lose weight. "Do you really like bread?" Svetlana asked curiously. "Like it. Butter and jam," I said lightly. "The way I see it, someone promised to protect the body." "Did I do anything bad to her then? You can believe the body is overjoyed." "Oh," Svetlana replied vaguely, "in the future, you can ask Olga how she takes care of her body." I hesitated, but broke another piece of white bread in two and spread jam generously. "Who came up with the wonderful idea of ​​hiding you in a woman's body?" "It seems to be the boss." "I don't doubt it." "Olga supports him." "Of course, Boris Ignatievich is Emperor and God to her." I was a little skeptical about that, but said nothing.Svetlana got up and went to the wardrobe.She opened the closet and looked thoughtfully at the hangers. "Are you wearing a bathrobe?" "What?" I choked on the bread. "Do you just walk around the house like this? These jeans will stretch out on you and be uncomfortable." "Any sportswear?" I asked complainingly. Svetlana looked at me mockingly, then said sympathetically: "Have." To be honest, I'd rather see this kind of clothing on someone else.For example, on Svetlana.White shorts and blouse.I don't know if it's for playing tennis or jogging. "Let's change clothes." "Sveta, I don't think we'll be in the room all night." "It's okay, just put it on first, and try to see if the size fits you well. Put it on, and I'll prepare tea." Svetlana walked out, and I hastily pulled down my jeans, started unbuttoning the unfamiliar over-buttoned blouses upside down, and looked at myself in the mirror with disgust. Anyway, she's a lovely girl.She could be the cover girl of a slightly erotic magazine. I hurriedly changed clothes and sat on the sofa.A soap opera was playing on the TV - surprisingly, Svetlana tuned to this channel.However, most of the other channels are also this kind of soap opera. "You look very beautiful." "Sveta, don't do this," I begged, "it just makes me sick." "Okay, excuse me," she agreed softly, and sat beside her. "Then what should we do?" "Us?" I repeated with a slight emphasis. "Yes, Anton. You don't come to me for nothing." "I should tell you what an unpleasant predicament I am in." "Yes, but since the boss," Svetlana relished, and said the word "boss" skillfully with respect and sarcasm at the same time, "you are allowed to tell me the truth, then I will It should help you, even if it is to obey the arrangement of fate." She couldn't help but say. I give in. "I can't be left alone. Not even for a minute. The whole plan is based on the dark consciously sacrificing its own pawns, either by destroying them or letting them die." "Like that time?" "Yes, exactly. If this alienation is directed at me, then there will be another murder immediately. At the moment when I have no alibi, of course, in my ... well, in their opinion. .” Svetlana looked at me, rested her chin on her hand, shook her head slowly and said: "At that point, Anton, you'll come out of this body like an imp out of a box. It turns out you're completely unlikely to commit these strings of murders, and the enemy will lose face." "No." "I beg your pardon. You know I haven't been on the patrol very long, and probably don't know anything." I am alert.Svetlana hesitated for a moment, then continued: "Tell me about the time when I had an accident... What was the situation? The dark powers wanted to stir me up. They knew that the Night's Watch patrol would find out, and even found out that you might Intervene in this matter and help them." "yes." "So a combination move was used, and a few bodies were sacrificed at the same time, and a few fake power centers were created. So the Night Watch patrol team was led away from the beginning. If the leader did not organize a counterattack , if you hadn't just rushed forward with all your might..." "Then you are my enemy now," I said, "and you are now studying with the Day Watchers." "That's not what I meant, Anton. I thank you, thank you to the whole patrol, but first of all—thank you. But I don't mean that now. You see, this thing you just told is like that story Realistic. But how is everything choreographed so accurately? A pair of poaching vampires, a young boy with high other potential, a girl with a terrible curse. A huge threat to the city." I don't know how to answer.I looked at her and felt a flush in my cheeks.A girl who wasn't a third of the way through, new to our business, articulated things so clearly in my presence when I should have done it. "And what happened now?" Svetlana didn't see my pain, "The murderer who kept murdering the Dark Messenger appeared. You are included in the list of suspects. The boss immediately resorted to clever tactics : You and Olga swap bodies. Yes, but how ingenious is this method? I understand that body swapping techniques—very common. Boris Ignatievich used this not long ago Trick, isn't it? Has he ever used the same trick twice in a row? And against the same enemy?" "I don't know, Sveta, they don't explain the details of the battle." "Then think about it with your head. Also, is Zaburon some kind of low-level vengeful lunatic? He led the Sun Watchers patrol team a long time ago. If this perverted murderer..." "Savage." "If the Day Watchers really let the wild man run wild on the streets of Moscow for several years in order to drive us apart, would the leader of the Day Watchers sacrifice him for such a trivial matter? Sorry, Anton, after all, you are Not too big a goal." "I understand that I am officially a fifth-level magician. But the boss said that I can actually reach the third level." "Even take that into consideration." We looked at each other, and I threw my hands together and said: "I'm convinced. You're probably right, Svetlana. But I've told you everything I know, and I don't see any other way." "That is, will you obey orders? Put on your skirts and never be alone for a moment?" “参加巡查队的同时，我就知道，我失去了一部分自由。” “一部分。”斯维特兰娜哧哧地笑了，“说得好。好吧，你自己做主吧。就是说我们要一起过夜吗？” I nod. “是的，但不在这儿。我最好一直出现在人们面前。” “睡觉呢？” “几个夜晚不睡觉——不是难事。”我耸耸肩膀，“我认为奥莉加的身体锻炼得不比我差。最近几个月她经常沉溺于上流社会的生活。” “安东，这种魔法我还没有学过，我该什么时候睡觉呢？” “白天，上课时。” 她皱皱眉头。我知道斯维特兰娜会同意的，这是肯定的。以她的性格一般不会拒绝帮助旁人的，而我毕竟不是旁人。 “我们去'马戈拉朱'吧？”我建议说。 "What is this place?" “印度餐厅，很不错的。” “它营业到天亮吗？” “不，很遗憾。但到时我们再想下一步该去哪儿。” 斯维特兰娜盯着我看了那么久，以至于我那全部天赋的厚脸皮也不够用了。我又有什么事做得不对了呢？ “安东，谢谢你，”斯维特兰娜深情地说，“太谢谢你了。你邀请我去餐厅，我等了已经有两个月。” 她站起身来，朝衣柜走去，打开衣柜，沉思地看着分开挂起来的衣服。 “按你的尺寸我挑不出什么好的，”她说，“你又得套牛仔裤了。会让我们进餐厅吗？” “当然。”我不太有信心地说。实在不行可以对那儿的工作人员略微施加点魔法影响。 “要是有什么情况，我就练习一下暗示魔法，”斯维特兰娜好像明白我的想法似的说道，“我会迫使他们放行。这算不算是一件好事？” "certainly." “你知道，安东，”斯维特兰娜从挂衣架上拿下连衣裙，贴在身上，然后摇摇头。她又取出一套驼色套裙。“使我感到惊讶的是守夜人总能用善和光明的重要性阐述他们对现实的任何影响。” “完全不是任何影响！”我恼火地说。 “是任何的，任何的影响，肯定是的——抢劫也好，谋杀也好，都会成为合理的。” "No." “你这么坚持自己的观点？你有多少次不得不干涉人类的意识？瞧，甚至在我们相遇时，你不也是强迫我相信我们是老熟人吗？你经常把他者的能力运用在生活中吧？” “经常，但是……” “你想，如果你在街上走，一个成人当着你的面在打一个孩子。你怎么办？” “如果还留有干预限额的话，”我耸耸肩膀，“那我就将实施劝谕术，那是不用说的。” “那你相信这是正确的吗？不考虑和琢磨一下吗？如果惩罚小男孩是有原因的呢？如果惩罚可以使他以后摆脱更大的麻烦，而现在他却要成为谋杀犯和强盗呢？那你——还是要实施劝谕术？” “斯维塔，你错了。” “错在哪里？” “即使我没有了心灵干预的限额，我也是不会袖手旁观的。” 斯维特兰娜哧哧笑起来： “你相信自己是正确的吗？界限在哪里？” “每一个人都会有独立的确定界限，这种情况会出现的。” 她沉思地看着我说： “安东，要知道，每一个新手都会提这种问题。是吗？” “是的。”我微笑道。 “你也习惯于回答它们了，你知道一套现成的答案，诡辩、历史上的例证、类比。” “不，斯维塔。问题不在这里。不过黑暗力量一般不会提这些问题。” "how do you know?" “黑暗使者可能救治人，光明使者可能谋杀人，”我说，“这是事实。你知道光明和黑暗之间的差别在哪里吗？” “我不知道。不知为什么没有给我们教过这个。难以准确地表达，对吗？” “完全不难。要是你首先想自己，想自己的兴趣——那么你的道路就通向黑暗。如果你想别人，你的道路就通向光明。” “去那里要走很长时间吗？去光明那里？” “永远。” “这毕竟只是说说而已，安东。这是一种语言游戏。有经验的黑暗魔法师会对新手说什么？也许是说那些漂亮和正确的话吧？” “是的，说的是自由，说的是每个人在生活中占据的那个他配占据的地位，说的是任何一种同情心都会有损于人，真正的爱情是盲目的，真正的善心是无济于事的，真正的自由是大家的自由。” “这不对吗？” "Yes," I nodded. “这也是真理的一部分。斯维塔，不要让我们选择绝对的真理。真理总是有两面性的。我们有权利拒绝那种十分令人不快的谎言。你知道我第一次向新手说起黄昏界的事吧？我们进入黄昏界是为了得到力量。代价就是拒绝接受我们不愿意接受的那一部分真理。做人类简单得多，简单百万倍，尽管他们要面对那么多灾难、问题以及烦恼，而这一切对他者来说根本就不存在。人类面前不会出现选择题——他们既可以是好人，也可以是坏人，一切都取决于时间，取决于周围环境，取决于前一夜读过哪本书，取决于午饭时吃下的煎牛排。这就是他们为什么这么容易控制的原因——就连最坏的歹徒也很容易被转向光明，而最好和最高尚的人也很容易被推入黑暗。而我们可是要做出选择的。” “要知道我已做了选择，安东。我已经进入过黄昏界。” "yes." “为什么我却不明白界限在哪里？我和某个经常参加黑暗力量的弥撒的女妖之间有什么差别？为什么我会提出这些问题？” “你永远会提出这些问题。开始——大声说，以后——暗自说。这不会过去的，永远不会。如果你想摆脱折磨人的问题——你选择的就不会是你现在的方向。” “我选择了我希望的。” “我知道。所以——要忍耐。” “一辈子吗？” “是的。生命将是长久的，但是你无论如何永远不会习惯、不会摆脱这些问题，每前进一步它都会伴随着你。”