Chapter 12 Chapter 12 Let me step on it, knife

It was Bao Jingsheng who hired me a taxi.It was a battered red Otto, and the engine was wheezing like an old man coughing.The dashboard was completely black, and the car stank of smoke, sweat, and leather.Bao Jingsheng opened the car door and pushed me in, and said, don't think about it, save a few more money and eat better, huh?I waved to him through the glass as I closed the car door.He stood there, so tall, he looked like a Big Mac in an American movie, and he could smash a car with a single blow.But he unexpectedly stretched out his hand and waved at me, his movements were as gentle as poor little Zhu Zhu.A piece of light fell and landed obliquely on Bao Jingsheng's mouth. A curved moon appeared on his long lips. I suddenly found that the fierce hippopotamus had become a kind living Buddha.I rolled down the glass and wanted to say something to him, but the taxi jumped and whined away.

The wind poured in from the window, blowing my face cold and hot for a while.I was still holding the two banknotes that Bao Jingsheng gave me, the temperature of my palm and the temperature of his buttocks were sticky together.I glanced at the driver and quietly opened my palms to see, one was fifty and the other was one hundred.I sighed, and suddenly I had a hundred and fifty dollars.I used to only have two dollars, three cents, five cents, one meal a day, and two round trips to school on foot, but now I have one hundred and fifty dollars. For a short while, I thought about whose money is the money in my hand, Xiao Ren's money?my money?Or Bao Jingsheng's money?Or is it borrowed money?Fortunately, this kind of thinking is no brainer, and I quickly figured out the matter. For Bao Jingsheng, this is his ripping off, and for Director Ren, it is her investment in the future. To me, it's a boy's gallantry.For the hero Maimed, it may be "ill-gotten gains".However, Maimed's attitude towards ill-gotten gains is also vague. He has said at least two contradictory sentences: one is, "A gentleman does not take ill-gotten gains", which is really resounding.Another sentence is, "what's wrong with getting ill-gotten gains"!It's even more deafening!Poor Maimed, this is really fucking interesting, the first sentence is your declaration, and the second sentence is your own defense, why am I so clear now?Finally I found myself smiling, because suddenly I had a lot of things figured out, and I had a hundred and fifty dollars.God, how short of money I am.

At the first street close to Yuejinfang, I asked the driver to stop the car.I walked slowly home.Since on this night after the rain, the house is dark and empty, and there is no one and no hot meals waiting for me, why should I rush to the road.The pavement in the eastern suburbs, like the pavement in the center of the city, was drenched with rain, and my marine boots gurgled when I stepped on it.I walked slowly, feeling very comfortable in my stomach and intestines, and my whole body was very comfortable.I remembered what Bao Jingsheng promised me in Red Bubbles, he would knock Tao Tao's leg for me, I laughed quietly, just like when Tao Tao said he would pooh Song Xiaodou back then, I didn't believe it at all, but I was very Huanxi, I think he is a little cute too.I am the fool that Zhu Zhu said, it is actually very easy to please me.

The eastern suburbs are dark, and it is exhausting to hear a few cocks crowing and dogs barking in the distance.At least compared with the center of the city, it's dark here, and the roads are sparsely populated.There are several mahjong halls facing the street that are still open, the kettle on the stove is steaming, the beauties are playing on the TV, and the mahjong players gathered around a table look like a big warm family.I have been wondering why the newspapers are calling out to care for laid-off workers every day?They seem to have plenty of oil and water, and the weather is good. Who needs who cares?I thought of my mother running around far away, so it would be better to open a mahjong parlor in the eastern suburbs, which is convenient for myself and the masses.

At the corner of Kuaijin Yuejinfang, a flower shop was closing the door.The light came out from the crack of the door, like a whip whipping in the dark.In the night in the eastern suburbs, the lights of the flower shop look very warm.A few green plastic pods stood at the foot of the door, with red plums, lilies, thirteen Taibaos, silver willows and yellow roses inserted in them... all flowers out of season.Boss Hua is a little girl from the countryside. She may not be too small, but she is indeed as small as a small fist. I often call her "Little Fist" in my heart.Little Fist smiled at every passerby, showing her utmost respect and humbleness.Every time she nodded and bowed to me, I would spend a few cents to buy her a flower or two.Memed said one should be rewarded for his humbleness.Although I don't live a fucking noble life, I can't see a woman taking care of another woman's company just for a few cents.

There are many days when I don't buy the flowers of Little Fist, because I haven't had enough of Little Fist in those days.But I am very grateful to her. Every time she sees me, she is always warm and respectful to me and calls me "big sister".I don't like the title "big sister", but when I called it out of my little fist, I felt a little sore in my heart, and I could hear her painstaking efforts.She can't call a girl who wears a skirt and a high-waisted jacket a "Miss", because "Miss" is only one step away from an "escort"; she can't call me an aunt, because I am clearly a middle school student; It's even more foolish, and calling her "sister" is obviously too rustic.In fact, I would like her to call me a sister. Little Fist is a clean girl, and being her sister won't make me blush.Today I have money, I decided to buy her a large bouquet of flowers.

I am the last customer of Little Fist today, and the biggest buyer. Her surprise turned into tears welling up in her eye sockets.Her fingers were soaked in cold water and turned red like carrots. She wiped her eye sockets with these carrots and stroked her hair. She said, big sister, big sister, God is going to take care of you. The next day is for good luck, I bought a lottery ticket and won the jackpot, and my friend who played with me drove a BMW.Little Fist has a flattering smile all over his face, his eyes and nose are gone, his smile is like a ping pong ball instead of a little fist.She offered me a whole bunch of yellow roses.

The yellow rose was dripping wet, dripping water all the way, and soaked my boots.When I arrived at the door of the house, I was worrying about how to get the keys, but the door creaked open.I just called "Mom", but I was stunned immediately.I didn't expect that my tears would come up like the tears of a small fist. I was confused by those tears. I was silent for a long time and still didn't make a sound.Dad wore cotton slippers, bowed, and stood in the door frame with his back to the light. Between us, there was a big bunch of wet yellow roses.No one said anything.He reached out to pat my head, or my face, as he always did.But the large bouquet of roses in my arms separated him. He tried several times but failed, so he had to take his hand back.I finally laughed.

I said, Dad, let me enter the house first. Dad sat on an old rattan chair and looked at me for a long, long time.He held a teacup in his hand like a hand stove.In fact, Dad was actually holding a teacup to keep warm.It's the weather in January, and Dad seems to be in winter forever.Winter is the hardest. In Yaya Valley's father's bedroom, there is an infrared heater, and the quartz tube has long since broken.In winter in Yaya Valley, the house is colder and darker than the outside.Dad is back, and Dad seems to have brought back the winter.Dad lost weight, and his body was wrapped in the grass-green military uniform, which made him look even thinner. His neck protruded from the wide collar, so thin that I couldn't bear to look at it.My mother often said that thin people are most afraid of cold, and fat people are most afraid of heat.Dad is thin, so he is afraid of the cold, but I don't know how to keep him warm when he comes home, because according to the season, there is no need for heating now.What I can do is to boil a pot of water on the stove and change the boiling water for him after a while.When changing the water, I touched my father's hand, and his hand was cold, as cold as a popsicle.He held the hot teacup tightly, but his hands were still cold.

I asked my father when he came home, and my father said that I have been back for a long time, about noon, he said, I will be back probably after a little noon. I looked at the house, and there was a grass-green box and a grass-green travel bag behind the door. Other than that, it was the same as when I left home in the morning.Like just being disturbed, leaving no trace, by a scrupulous guest, and that guest was my poor dad.I asked Dad, where did you go around?Dad smiled, what's going on in the eastern suburbs, I haven't turned anywhere.Dad's voice has also become thinner, so dry that there is no moisture left, like the firewood of the mountain people, it will break if it is folded.He sat on the wicker chair, his whole body was like a firewood, he sat like this for most of the day.But he looked at me and still smiled.I said Dad, you haven't eaten yet, have you?

Dad said he ate it.He said that I put a lot of bread in my travel bag, and when I got home, I ate all of it and drank a lot of water.He patted his stomach through his fat military uniform, just like he used to tease me, he said, if you feel it, you can still find three pieces of bread. I forced a smile and put the matter of eating aside.I found some bottles and cans to put flowers in. There were too many flowers, and I divided them into at least seven or eight places before inserting them.Dad just sat on the wicker chair, like a quiet child, watching me do this and that.Outside the window is the night after the rain, and the sound of mahjong comes in, making a continuous sound, like cold water seeping into the pit of my heart little by little.Dad sighed, and said, Feng'er, what you got in your hand is a yellow rose, right?You have a boyfriend? I stopped, but didn't know how to answer, so I just inserted all the yellow roses one by one as if I didn't hear them.Who is my boyfriend? My ears are still hurting, it's that kind of red pain.Poor yellow rose…. I asked my father, is this time home to visit relatives or a business trip? Dad said no, he said, I am back, and I will never go to Yaya Valley again. I dare not look into Dad's eyes, I know there is something in his eyes.I put my head down and inserted the last yellow rose into a plastic cup.I laughed first, and then I said, Dad, you should have changed your job a long time ago. After you changed your job, you will be with us. My mother and I are two women who will serve you.What does Yaya Valley mean? In the deep mountains and old forests, even wild boars, hares, and wild foxes are all males. Dad laughed too, this time he really laughed easily.He said, Feng Er, you have learned badly. I said that I didn't learn to be bad, I just didn't want to be a wimpy good old man. Dad stopped talking.I looked up and saw that the smile was still on his face, but the tears rolled down from his eye sockets.He said, Feng'er, don't you know that my father is a good-for-nothing old man. I was so dumb that I couldn't speak, and I thought I must cry too.But I was stupid for a while, and I found that I didn't feel like crying at all.I went to the bathroom and pulled out a section of toilet paper, and gently wiped the tears off my father's face.I said, Dad, don't cry.How nice it is to change your career. After changing your career, you will be at home every day, and my mother and I will serve you. Tears rolled down Dad's eye sockets again, but he quickly wiped them away on his sleeve.My father said, if you change jobs, you will live with your father, and your mother will leave with someone else.He said, I should have changed my job many years ago, and if I want to keep my military uniform, I can keep a military marriage.Dad smiled dryly. He said, what's the point? It's just a military marriage, written on paper.Let your mother go, your mother is also pitiful. I felt that I was really calm and terrible. I said, Dad, is that the man who gave me the scimitar? Dad said yes, yes, that is my old comrade-in-arms who was running border trade. I nodded, I didn't show surprise at all.I said, oh, I guess it was him. I have never actually seen him, and I try to imagine his appearance, but nothing specific can emerge in front of my eyes, such as nose, mouth, or the voice of speaking.All I could remember was the machete I had hanging on the wall.I went into the bedroom, took off the machete and threw it on the ground, and stomped on it with my marine boots.I didn't say a word, and stepped on it hard.Dad followed, his face full of anxiety.Dad said, what are you doing, Fenger.What are you doing, Fenger. I said, what's the matter, Dad, I didn't do anything, I just stepped on it if I wanted to. I don't know how many times I stepped on it, the beads inlaid on the handle of the knife have fallen off, some are smashed, and some are rolling all over the ground, but the blade is intact, no matter how much I step on it, it won't break. Dad said, forget it, what are you doing with the knife? Yeah, what am I doing with a knife.I thought, what the hell do I have to do with a knife, even my father recognizes it, so what does it have to do with me. I picked up the knife and wiped the blade with my finger. I seemed to hear the sound of wind blowing across the water, and my finger was pulled out with a bloody gash.The blood oozes out, and the pain makes me feel better. I lay in bed, tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep.Tonight the quilt has become like iron, cold and hard.As I tossed and turned, I tried to be careful not to make any noise.Dad was snoring lightly from the next door, and I really admired him for letting things go.Dad fell asleep, maybe he was so sleepy because he was tired?So what if he doesn't sleep?My mother said that my father had never dared to blush with anyone except for two glasses of wine and a few bold words.He Feng lost, poor father didn't even drink these two glasses of wine.Fortunately, Dad can still eat, although he will never gain weight, and Dad can still sleep, although he actually has a lot of worries.I really want to get up and drink some water. The snacks eaten by the red foam are very spicy and salty. I am very thirsty.I felt like a small flame was burning in my throat, and my tongue was almost bubbling. But I still held back, I was afraid of waking up my father.In his later life, there will be no military marriage, no military uniform, all he has left is me, and all I can give him is fucking silence.I just lie quietly on the bed and don’t move. I took out the scimitar, pressed the blade against my forehead, cheeks, lips, and even stuffed the handle into my mouth. The coolness of the steel made my thirst Little by little it eased. This is the first time I have used my body, skin and mouth so close to a knife.The knife shone dimly in the dark, with a green light, its curvature, sharpness, and heavy weight all looked so elegant and mysterious.The man who abducted my mother kept appearing in front of my eyes. His face was blurred and his voice was as hoarse as the night. In fact, I had never seen him at all.I understand now that he has never seen me, he has always been afraid to see me, he knows that his enemy is not my father, but my father's daughter. This was supposed to be a man I hated, but when I was trapped in bed and burned with thirst, I didn't have the energy to hate anyone at all.I thought of the man who gave me the scimitar, and there was no hatred in my heart.I stroked the knife, and then I fell asleep.In the dream, the blurry man became clear, his face was like a machete.He told me that a ruthless man looks like a fucking scimitar, do you believe it? When I woke up, Dad was still snoring lightly next door, how soundly he slept.I finally got off the ground with bare feet, and went to see my father first on tiptoe.I touched my father's bed and leaned my head towards him.Suddenly, I almost screamed - in the dark before dawn, Dad pretended to be snoring, and looked at me with wide eyes... oh! *the fifth part But even in a daze, my hands were still stretched out in the schoolbag, and the knives, my two knives, were lying there, pressing heavily on the bottom of the schoolbag.I gripped the handle of the knife, feeling a little more at ease in my heart.The person who gave me the scimitar abducted my mother, and the person who gave me the hunting knife almost tore off my ear. What should I use these two knives for?Why I brought both knives, I don't know.