Chapter 10 Chapter 9 Everyone's Heart

Zeyu is like a dazzling diamond, it seems to be everyone's dream, However, the brilliance of such diamonds is due to the eyes of many connoisseurs. Although A Tuo is simple and unpretentious, it is not a jade stone waiting to be excavated at the bottom of the river, but a towering giant tree. A person who looks down for treasure will never see him unless he lifts his head up properly. <42> The story, very well written, as you can see, I don't want to and don't know how to cut out every interesting character.I write a thousand words every day. Three weeks later, when the plot reaches the point where I invite A Tuo for his first cup of mocha coffee, I think it's time to publish it on the Internet.

"What account should I register? Or use the old account?" I thought, looking at the English letters engraved on the keyboard. After five minutes, I slowly typed "Sunday". In my heart, this was a happy day when the laundry was opened. Unfortunately, someone had already registered, so I had to change it to "Sundate", which means that every Sunday has a beautiful appointment. , and the nickname is "Fluorescent Jelly Fish". There is a word Ying in it that I like, which also means transparent and flexible. I just posted it once every three days, and started dreaming in the online novel board.

Then, when I was working in a coffee shop every day, I would put a notebook on the counter to write down the superficial inspirations at any time. When I was studying in the club, I would also put the notebook next to me to record my mental journey in the past year. Ze Yu also came to the club to prepare for the graduate school exam, so I put away the notebook.I'm not like the protagonist of an idiot romance novel, who writes a diary for the people he likes. It was usually eleven or twelve o’clock when I returned to the dormitory, and I typed the novel word by word with the company of tea. Many freshmen in the university greatly improved their typing skills in the chat room or in the water polo room, and I relied on memory.

I only let my three roommates know about publishing novels on the Internet, and Baijia, who usually likes to read all kinds of novels, naturally became my first reader. I also experienced the first draft reminder in my life, and I couldn’t help feeling jump for joy. "That's an interesting story, can I have a peek at your unpublished inventory?" Baijia begged to look at me, but I felt embarrassed, and of course opened the folder immediately. From now on, Baijia has the benefit of seeing the latest progress of the novel at any time, as long as she is willing. Gradually, in addition to Baijia, I also began to have other readers.Several high school girls on the Internet also wrote to me to cheer me up. Although they are strangers, they always move me.

Miraculously, my brother’s girlfriend Wen Ling also wrote to me, and she carefully asked, “May I ask if you are Li Fengming’s younger sister? I think the protagonist’s brother in the story looks like my boyfriend :P” which made me laugh out loud for three minutes. Fortunately, in addition to chatting with me about brother's stupid gossip, Wen Ling also provided me with many valuable opinions on writing. She said that the story should not include too many fragments of the real world, so as not to make myself too heavy. Adapt to reality.If I want to dream, I should forget about it and forget about unnecessary burdens.

Before I knew it, the first Christmas after going to college was coming, and next Monday was Christmas Eve. "Would you like to have a sleepover on Christmas Eve? I can bake a delicious cake." Si Ting invited openly, wanting to show off the skills she learned in the pastry club. "Okay, I can go to the store to borrow simple tools and make all kinds of coffee for everyone to drink in the dormitory." I agree with the sleep together, and I also suggest that we simply cook a hot pot around the stove. "I'm fine, let's get together." Nian Cheng held up the dumbbells. Her girlfriend always wanted her hands to be thicker.

"Great! Then I'll go and reject the date with the stinky boy, let's have a warm bedtime!" Baijia clapped her hands, a poor boy was about to be released as a pigeon. Five minutes later, when Baijia was sitting in my seat and reading a novel, she suddenly said, "By the way, Siying, how about inviting your strange friend named A Tuo over for a sleepover? I'm so curious about him!" I was lying on the bed watching economics, scratching my head and saying that boys in the second female dormitory couldn’t get in at all, let’s forget it, and he didn’t know everyone well, it was really weird and embarrassing.

And Si Ting asked Baijia, who is the A Tuo we are talking about, and Bai Jia began to strongly recommend my novel, and roughly said that A Tuo took me to the laundry shop and brother Bao's house, Si Ting laughed so hard Trembling wildly, the unsmiling Nian Cheng couldn't help but chirp out. "Okay, I also want to meet that weird guy, Tuo." Si Ting thought for a while, and said, "Does Tuo live in the dormitory of Tsinghua University? The access control of the male dormitory should be looser. We can cook hot pot at his place." .” "A Tuo has lived outside since his junior year, but I haven't been there, so I only know where it is." I said, wondering if A Tuo's place is big enough for five people.

"I'm fine, let's go." Nian Cheng snickered, obviously just wanting to see the resentful man whose girlfriend was once robbed of his love. "That's the decision, go to A Tuo's house to cook hot pot!" Baijia concluded and clapped her hands. I told A Tuo of our decision, and A Tuo said that of course it was okay, and his tone was a little happy, but he adopted a dog three months ago, because he was afraid that we would not like the smell of dogs. "Have a dog? Why didn't you mention it to me?" I asked, and it was only after I finished asking that I remembered that I was busy writing novels during this time, and I didn't get along with A Tuo much.

"Ah Zhu who was drowning, she said that her family's dog gave birth. Seeing that I am honest and honest, she decided to reward me with one." A Tuo had a rare wry smile, obviously that puppy had caused a lot of trouble in his life. "What kind of dog is it? Will it become very big in the future?" I worried for him. "It shouldn't be so. What I'm more worried about is that I will graduate in half a year. What should I do with it?" A Tuo thought for a while and said, "I'll ask Brother Bao to have a look. Maybe he just needs a dog. Please ask him. Two years is just right.”

I don't think Brother Bao is the kind of person who just needs a dog. <43> December 24, 2001, six o'clock in the evening. I took Baijia and read as Zai Siting. The four of us had arrived at A Tuo's residence on Shuiyuan Street. A Tuo was standing downstairs waiting for us with great interest, holding the hot pot ingredients and ingredients he had just bought from a convenience store in his hand. Soup base, after a simple introduction to each other, we walked up to A Tuo's small suite on the fifth floor. A Tuo's seven-square-meter-sized room looks a bit messy at first glance, but in fact it's just that there are a lot of things, which are not much different from the things that ordinary boys like to put. Iron King Kong dolls, baseballs, building blocks, toolboxes, shoe boxes, stuffed half full The laundry tub, and of course the large cabinet of books accumulated by the fourth year of college, the cleanest place is the tatami sitting area that A Tuo deliberately tidied up. "What a cute dog! What's his name?" Baijia squatted down and patted a puppy on the floor that was biting a carrot. The puppy bit the carrot to pieces, and the ground was covered with radish crumbs and saliva. I also squatted down to look at it. Although the puppy is young, it has a strong body and is full of energy. It actually looks a bit like Atuo between its brows. I laughed, so I took another look at Atuo. He nodded, probably knowing me. What are you thinking. "I don't know yet, Azhu wants me to call him Xiaozhuzhu, but he is a man, he will be angry if he is called like this." A Tuo took out the pot and put it on the induction cooker. "It's fun, can I name this little boy?" Baijia poked the puppy's stomach with her finger, laughing happily. "This...Actually, I planned to ask Siying to name it, because she also knew that Ah Zhu." A Tuo helped Si Ting and Nian Cheng take out the big can of drink from the bag, and of course there was another cake. "Siying, let me choose the name, I really want to call him Carrot!" Baijia acted like a baby to me. Of course I smiled and nodded: "Just call him Carrot!" I sat on A Tuo's bed, looking at several photo albums and graduation yearbooks on the bedside, I turned on the bedside lamp, took a photo album and looked through it, while the four of them started pouring water to cook soup. Jia told A Tuo that I was writing an online novel and made him a rather unique supporting role, and A Tuo was at a loss for laughing. I was holding the photo album, and some of the photos in it had turned yellow, but A Tuo preserved them very well.When he was a child, he had an upright face, the kind of face that Captain Xie Jinyuan asked him to stick to the Sixing Warehouse and he would do it. A Tuo's childhood seems to have been quite colorful. There are several photos of birthday cake cutting, and the number of candles on each cake is different, which means that A Tuo is not lonely every year on his birthday. I noticed that the backgrounds in these birthday photos were not the same, and the faces around A Tuo also changed, maybe because he had quite a lot of relatives, and everyone rushed to help the well-known A Tuo celebrate his birthday. "Tuo, which one is your father and which one is your mother?" I handed the photo album to Baijia. "Oh, I don't have any in this one. There are a few in the oldest one on the left, but not many." A Tuo Baijia glanced at the photobook in his hand. "You have so many relatives who help you celebrate your birthday every year? How happy." Baijia said, and Si Ting relayed and began to talk about the horrors of their tribe's birthday customs. A Tuo shook his head, saying that those people in the photo are not relatives, but kind uncles he knew when he was a child. As for his father and mother divorced when he was very young, but his father often went out for business and entertainment. , so A Tuo often had to take tens of dollars to the street to collect his own lunch and dinner. His family contact book from the first to third grades of elementary school was signed for him by the grandmother who sold maltose cakes in the alley. "It's the grandma in this photo. She is a very nice person. She would also help me celebrate my birthday and cook pork knuckle noodles for me. Unfortunately, she passed away in the September 21 earthquake the year before last." A Tuo sighed, saying that he used to go to Nantou sometimes. Look at grandma. "What about the contact book for the fourth grade? Who signed it? Why didn't grandma sign it for you?" Nian Cheng looked at A Tuo's calendar of beautiful women hanging on the wall. "No, it's this Uncle who is holding a cigarette and holding my hand to cut cakes. Since I moved to Taichung in the fourth grade, this Uncle who sells pork has helped me sign the contact book. He is very nice. His son and I was in the same class in the fourth grade, and besides helping his son deliver lunch, he would also make a lunch for me, otherwise I would have starved to death." A Tuo threw the swallow dumplings into the pot and looked at everyone with a smile: "His son later I was in the same class as me when I was in college, so it’s very fate.” "Could it be that you moved again in the fifth grade? The people in the photo have changed again." Si Ting pointed at a few giggling boys in the photo. "Yeah, I moved to Taipei in the fifth and sixth grades. Those big boys were all students of National Taiwan University. At that time, I hung out with them in the billiard room of the mansion, so of course they took turns signing for me and letting me I have seen many different and interesting lives. You will never believe it, but my current teacher Puwu is one of them!" A Tuo seemed very happy, but I felt distressed when I heard it. While cooking the hot pot, A Tuo continued to talk about his previous life with photos. His father was almost never at home, and the only means of communication between the two was a few banknotes on the dining table, so the young A Tuo spent all day wandering outside, and because he was open-minded and loved talking to people, he and Quite special relationships are established in the streets and alleys. When he was young, he saw that the grandmother selling maltose in the alley was coughing all the time. He could use the 30 yuan for dinner to go to the western pharmacy to buy two cans of cold syrup for her to drink, and he would chat with her about her son who was a soldier in Jinmen. Older, he met Ade at school, whose lunchboxes were always full, and Atu was brave enough to give him the lunch money for meat dumplings, saying that he would buy half of his lunchboxes, and the two became friends from then on. I also met Uncle Pork. After entering junior high school, A Tuo's family moved to Hsinchu. He can be good friends with all the rogue students in the school, because he secretly opened the iron cabinet of the discipline office and burned their demerit lists, and thus learned eighteen ways to use butterfly knives. "It turns out that you are a little hooligan in middle school." Nian Cheng said casually. "It doesn't count. I haven't been demerited or fought in the three years of middle school in my country. I just think those friends who love to play hard are fun and don't study hard all day, so I like to hang out with them. After moving back to Taipei in high school, I Occasionally, I would go back to the former country for a walk, to see how the juniors who used to hang out with me were doing, but it was funny, I had never fought before, but I fought once when I went back." A Tuo was very pleased He said happily: "One of the students with the biggest tail, brother Bao, met him in prison, so it's a fate." "When you were in Hsinchu, which junior high school did you go to? I went to Guangfu." I said. "Me too. It turns out that you have been my junior, ha." A Tuo smiled and continued to tell the story. In high school, A Tuo finally finished a school from beginning to end, and did not go to Kaohsiung with his father. For three years in high school, A Tuo’s lunch was often simple meat dumplings from the school’s welfare agency, but his enthusiasm was not idle. He taught the illiterate Obasan in the welfare agency to read English, and since then he has endless bread and drinks. The finished soda has a lot of nutritional balance.When he graduated from the High School Attached to Normal University, that Obasan already had the English level of a junior high school graduate, and he happily recognized A Tuo as his godson. From before to now, A Tuo's footsteps have always been more industrious than anyone else. "It's so pitiful, do you still have contact with your dad now?" Baijia put her hands on the hot pot to keep warm. "My dad, he failed in business later, and I heard that he is now in mainland China." A Tuo said without hesitation, "I always feel that we will meet again, and I hope he can take care of himself and live a relaxed life. Life. ’ Passing plastic bowls to everyone. "Carrots! Eat meat!" I put a small bowl of sliced ​​meat on the ground. The carrot came over, sniffed it, gnawed it, and it became clean all of a sudden. I want to play with it, but it has a personality and shakes its head away, jumping on the bed and lying on its stomach. "How long have you been raising carrots? Does he know any special tricks? Come on, sit down!" Si Ting greeted carrots with a piece of sausage in between.Carrot jumped out of the bed, Lightning snatched away the little sausage on Si Ting's chopsticks, and immediately jumped back on the bed, enjoying the sausage on the pillow, making the pillow dirty. "I've raised it for a while, but I didn't bother to ask it for anything, and I'm not its owner, as long as it thinks it's doing well." A Tuo replied very naturally: "Living together, we have to be patient with each other. " Carrot jumped out of bed, put his hind feet up, and peed on the floor. A Tuo sighed, picked up a few pieces of toilet paper and put them down. Carrot hesitated for a moment, then picked up the toilet paper and spread it on the place where it just peed. We all laughed. Few people keep dogs but really regard dogs as friends rather than pets. Most of them are just lip service. We gathered around the hot pot, eating and chatting, probably because of the influence of A Tuo's growth story just now, the atmosphere caused it, and Nian Cheng, who has always been cool, rarely talked about her painful experience of coming out of the closet in the past, and Si Ting also said Her family’s land was cheated by a businessman at a low price when she was a child and she cried when she talked about her childhood relocation memories. Baijia and I quickly comforted her, and A Tuo also quickly encouraged Si Ting with Xiaocai’s wonderful journey of struggle as a body doctor. At half past eight, everyone's stomachs are full. "What are you going to do later? Where can I renew the stall?" Nian Cheng leaned against the back of the chair, stirring the soup pot with serving chopsticks. "Going to sing?" Pokka looked at me. "Go to the back mountain of Qing University to set off fireworks." I suggested, looking at A Tuo.It's been a long time since I set off fireworks. "It's not bad." Nian Cheng agreed immediately, Si Ting had no objection, and Bai Jia had no choice but to nod. "Okay, let's pack up and leave!" A Tuo stood up, and Carrot barked twice energetically. Tsingta University is less than three minutes away from the place where A Tuo lives. We bought a lot of fireworks in the grocery store and came to the back mountain of Tsingda University excitedly. The association also organized many activities, and the Faith, Hope, and Love Association dispatched a large number of evangelical troops to sing around the school, and there were people everywhere. We set off fireworks near the relatively deserted plum garden. Of course, I showed off the stunt of launching a sky cannon with both hands. The aggressive Nian Cheng also followed suit. Si Ting and Bai Jia only dared to light the diamond cannon placed on the ground. , or simply sit down and watch us play, while A Tuo happily fires a skyrocket with his mouth, making everyone sweat for him. "Try it, it's fun." A Tuo stuffed two sky cannons into the palms of Si Ting and Bai Jia, holding incense sticks as a gesture. "Don't! I'll be afraid!" Baijia was so frightened that she threw the sky cannon to the ground, and Si Ting also screamed. But A Tuobi fiddled for a long time, and I sang with Niancheng, the two girls finally mustered up the courage, and under our command, they used their hands to release the first shot of soaring flames in their lives. After success, The two cried and laughed, and they were so happy.We played until the school police came and blew whistles to expel them, and then we learned how ninjas dropped five smoke bombs and fled down the mountain taking advantage of the pungent sulfur smell and white smoke. We said goodbye to A Tuo after we had supper together at the Lailai Soymilk Shop in Qingda Night Market. On the way back to Jiaotong University, I was still the one who was carrying Baijia and Niancheng Zai Siting. Just as I was about to enter the road around the school, I saw Zeyu walking out of the school gate leading his new girlfriend. After finishing the Jiaotong University dance hosted by the Federation of Students, I stopped the car, said hello to Zeyu, and briefly introduced my roommates. That was the first time Zeyu saw me riding a wild wolf. He only knew that I bought my brother's motorcycle before.He looked surprised, like I did some magic trick to please him, so he laughed and said I always kept him fresh. Freshness?I thought this was probably a good comment, so I said goodbye happily, planning to tell him next time that I would shoot sky cannons with my hands like a boy. <44> Back at Zhuxuan, Niancheng and Siting went to take a bath first. Baijia seemed to be still interested, and invited me to take a walk around the bamboo lake next to the department hall, saying that he wanted to find out the ending of my novel while walking.It is the first time that a reader invites an author, and of course I am obliged. "Have you ever heard the ghost story about the president of the sailing club? It's about Zhuhu Lake." Baijia said with a dark side. Then she talked about the ghost stories she heard from her immediate seniors, but every school has ghost stories. The president of a sailing club unfortunately drowned on a boat in the middle of the night, but no one noticed. They were only wondering why he didn't go back to his room or go to class. In the next few nights, his roommates often saw a figure in his bed. The depression in the lake was wet when I touched it, and it occurred to me that this student might have drowned, so the school drained the bamboo lake and found his swollen corpse stuck in the drain hole at the bottom of the lake. In order to prevent similar incidents from happening again, the school So sailing clubs were abolished.End of story. "Will talking about this at night make your ass creepy?" Baijia breathed out, and the water vapor turned into a white mist. "Although I'm sure this story was bluffed out, and there is no sailing club in Jiaotong University, it's still a little creepy to hear it in such a cold place at such a late hour." I admitted that I shivered symbolically. We sat and rested on the stone chairs by the lake on the first floor of the department building, and there was a couple snuggling nearby, chatting and laughing. There is a drinking machine next to it, and Baijia asked me for a can of hot green tea. "Tonight, thank you for giving me the right to name it." Baijia clinked a glass with me as a thank you. "No, the name carrot is very cute." I smiled and said that if carrot understood, he should be very happy too. "Siying, what do you think of A Tuo?" Baijia asked, holding green tea in both hands and blowing. "He's a bit dumb, but he's just a nice guy, a good friend who has nothing to say." I said.For some reason, Christmas Eve was extraordinarily cold. "What else?" Baijia looked at me.Between a half-smile and a half-smile, I felt that her spirit was a little tense. "I know a lot of interesting friends, so he must be an interesting person." I imitated Mr. Gu Long's usual sentences. Baijia didn't speak for a minute, but concentrated on drinking the hot tea in her hand, so concentrated that I could hear the rhythm and sip of every sip. I have an indescribable intuition that I suddenly don't want to stay here, I should go back to Zhuxuan. But just when I wanted to suggest going back for a walk, Pokka spoke first. "I really like the story you wrote, really." Baijia looked at the hot tea in her hand. "Thank you. You are my first reader, which means a lot." I watched the ripples of the orange streetlights reflected on the bamboo lake. "When I was reading your novel, I kept projecting myself on the protagonist, that is, you." Baijia said, "Then, when I read that Tuo took you to the laundry for dinner, I felt this People are so stupid that they are dumb, but they are so cute.” I didn't know what Baijia was going to say next, so I had to wait quietly for her to finish. "Later, I read that A Tuo took you to watch a movie at the home of the gangster, it was really weird." Baijia laughed as he said, "You wrote it very vividly, and the gangster seemed to have become a very funny man. The role, I remember that day I dreamed that I was sitting next to the underworld and didn't dare to take a breath, but my stomach hurt from laughing." I smiled, knowing she hadn't finished. "Later, you wrote about Xiaocai, about preparing for the entrance exam, and about Azhu. I felt like I followed you for a whole year. I followed you and saw many people and things around me, and I grew up with you." Baijia Looking at me, the orange street lights set off her beautiful facial features more elegantly. Pokka took a deep breath, like I do when I need oxygen and courage. But I found that I was also puffing up my chest deeply, sucking the cold air into my lungs. "Of course, I will follow you to meet A Tuo." Baijia didn't show any timidity, her eyes were shining brightly. "Hmm." I agreed casually. "Maybe he is just an important supporting role in your life, maybe you are just and can only see Zeyu, but in your story, I fell in love with the gentle and simple A Tuo in your eyes." Baijia's eyes are very Determined, unmoving. "Tuo? No way?" Although I had a premonition that Baijia would say that, I still could only make such a simple reaction. "If this story continues to be written, you will gradually discover that A Tuo is good. The ending of the story must be that you and A Tuo are together." Baijia said quietly: "Because A Tuo has already discovered you. good." I was a little shocked, but also a little embarrassed. But I can't say where this negative emotion came from, and I don't want to explore it. "However, since the story hasn't reached that part yet, I want to ask you a question earlier." Baijia looked at me with a strange look in her eyes. I looked at her and knew the question mark in Baijia's heart without guessing. Because her thoughts are written between her brows without reservation. "A Tuo and I are just friends. We used to be, we are now, and we will always be in the future, so you don't need my permission to do anything you want." My tone became serious, and it also became serious: "But, you I only met A Tuo for one night, don't you think your problem came too early?" "I'm afraid it's too late to ask, and I won't be able to wait for your answer." Baijia put on a smiling face: "I want to know more about Tuo, I want to be with Tuo, and I want to be with Tuo without destroying the friendship between you and me, and between you and Tuo." I nodded briskly and said she was thinking too much. I wanted to ask Baijia, what is it about A Tuo that she has a lot of love for, especially A Tuo who lives in my story.But I immediately dismissed such thoughts. A Tuo is a good person, of course I understand his kindness better than anyone else, but I don't want that kindness to cross the boundary of that friendship.Other than that, of course I hope he finds someone great because he's a great friend in my life. As for Baijia, although we have only known each other for more than three months, I can see that in the next four years of college, we will be the best and most intimate friends.She would ask politely that she wanted to be with Tuo, and she was definitely not proud.She does have the conditions to make her wishes come true with whomever she wants to be with.different from me. On the way back to Zhuxuan together, Baijia resumed her usual relaxed tone and chatted with A Tuo and Zeyu. Baijia said that Zeyu is like a dazzling diamond, which seems to be everyone's dream. However, the reason why such a diamond is brilliant is that it is carved by the eyes of many connoisseurs. She also said that although A Tuo is simple and unpretentious, he is not a jade stone waiting to be discovered at the bottom of the river, but a towering giant tree. Those who look down for treasures will never see him in their lifetime unless they raise their heads properly. Diamonds need to be polished to shine, but A Tuo can be great on his own, this is the first time she has met such a boy. I can't quite understand the metaphor of Baijia, maybe it's because I have never been a gem or a giant tree. But there is one thing I understand without a metaphor. "Baijia, although you are very sure, I also believe in your vision, but I hope you can get in touch with A Tuo more before making a decision, because A Tuo's experience of falling out of love last time was very painful." The higher you climb, the more painful the fall, you are so beautiful and smart, if A Tuo is with you, it is like attacking Mount Everest in one breath, and if you fall, you will be smashed to pieces.” "Don't worry, I've known him a hundred times in your stories." Baijia's footsteps are very light, bouncing up and down, as if she is already with A Tuo. But I felt that my steps were a little heavy. It wasn't until I climbed into bed and closed my eyes that night that I had a rough idea of ​​why my resistance came from. A Tuo and I have known each other for a year and a half. During this period, A Tuo was depressed and lost in love, while I was secretly in unrequited love. Both of them registered zero points in the column of love.It is also because of this that the relationship between A Tuo and I can be so natural, without disturbing each other's boyfriend and girlfriend, avoiding suspicion, and saving unnecessary reporting. But if Baijia and A Tuo are together, I'm afraid there will be a distance that must be kept between me and A Tuo.But I can't stop A Tuo's good fate, and I have no right to question Baijia's choice. Just let it be. <45> After Christmas, Baijia asked me for A Tuo's phone number, excitedly asked A Tuo to go for a walk, and suddenly said that he just bought two movie tickets, and a friend broke the appointment and asked A Tuo to accompany him to watch, all of a sudden Said that he bought a large jigsaw puzzle with 1,000 to 3,000 pieces, but he didn’t know where to start, and asked A Tuo if he could complete it with him. Of course, A Tuo said yes, as long as he is not working part-time, it will be fine. Finally, on the floor of A Tuo's room, there was a large jigsaw puzzle that was under construction for a long time. Baijia smiled and told me that she is not such a proactive person, she is just reviewing the tricks that the boys used to pursue her. And my life is the same as before, working part-time, going to clubs, writing novels, simple and busy. According to Zeyu, the National Taiwan University Institute of Economics and Engineering had the earliest exams in mid-January, so Zeyu went less and less to coffee shops and spent more and more time in clubs preparing for graduate exams. Sometimes I saw him carrying a sleeping bag and a coffee pot to the club to stay up all night, obviously it was the final stage of giving it a go. Even if there were others discussing and debating the preparations for the club’s cold training plan, he was not distracted and said a word. Also because he was concentrating on preparing for the exam, although I was only one hand away from him, the number of passing notes was much less. Sometimes I saw him drink up the coffee pot, and I would automatically help him to the end of the corridor. Hot water, and simply make him another cup of coffee. At least in the Wuping space of the small community, there is no other existence beside Zeyu, and enjoying his concentration and tranquility alone also makes me feel a touch of happiness. ************* The last day of 2001 to 2002 is Monday. I have been wondering whether Zeyu will go to the club to study that day. If so, we can count down the New Year's Eve together. If not, we should have a plan for the first New Year's Eve after college. And A Tuo's invitation call came on Sunday night, when I just returned from home to the dormitory, still holding the sun cakes that my mother brought from my mother's house, and put the hard hat and scarf on the table. The dormitory phone rang, and Baijia answered it and handed it to me. "I just went back to the dormitory, huh, do you want to eat sun cakes? Save two real ones that my mother brought from Taichung for you?" I asked, squatting down to take off my shoes, and noticed that Baijia was secretly watching me. "Okay, I like eating very much. By the way, I want to ask if you are free tomorrow night, let's count the seconds together?" A Tuo asked straightforwardly. "I...I don't know yet, Zeyu doesn't know if she will stay in the club to study, and..." I looked at Baijia, she was pretending to concentrate on surfing the Internet, but her password Entered incorrectly three times in a row. "Then why don't you ask Zeyu, if he doesn't know how to go to clubs, you can come to Brother Bao and me? Brother Bao said that it is most appropriate to watch disaster movies during the New Year's Eve. Also, Brother Bao's new woman I will also come together, do you want to meet my sister-in-law? I heard that my sister-in-law is very virtuous and does not match Brother Bao at all. I think it should be quite fun. After watching the movie, we can also go to find Tietou. Tietou has been sleeping late recently. ....." A-Tuo talked endlessly, which made my heart itch, so I really wanted to agree to him just like that. But when I saw Baijia biting her lower lip, I couldn't bear it. "No, I want to try my luck, and I don't even know how to take the C language computer-based test that we have planned recently. If it happens that Zeyu is staying in the club, I can ask him for advice." I said, I hope Tuo stop seducing me, because I really want to see Brother Bao's woman. "C language? It should be quite simple. If you don't mind, I can teach you." A Tuo said, and I could see him scratching his head. "I want to teach Ze Yu." I said firmly. "That's it, okay, I'll ask Brother Bao when he will bring a woman home next time, and I'll ask you out then." A Tuo smiled and said in a nonchalant tone. "Well then, I'm going to take a shower. I'll remember to leave some sun cakes for you, if you don't eat them secretly." I also smiled, but I regretted that I missed it. It should be fun New Year's Eve activities. "Bye, come, say goodbye to Sister Siying?" A Tuo didn't know what to say, and then I heard an energetic bark.It turned out to be carrots. I hung up the phone, pretended everything was normal, picked up the washbasin and took a shower. After taking a shower, Baijia just hung up the phone, made a victory sign to me, and smiled brightly. "Thank you for turning down A Tuo's appointment just now, I knew you were the kindest!" Bai Jiale was like a child, and said again: "I called A Tuo to count the seconds, and he agreed, do you feel that Where is the best place to count the seconds? Tuo would like it better?" I wiped my wet hair and said I didn't know, but I wondered why A Tuo didn't say that he would take Baijia to Brother Bao's house? "Do you think going to Baoshan Suspension Bridge late at night to count the seconds is not romantic? Will it add points?" Baijia asked with a very happy tone. "Why don't you go directly to the hotel and get a room," Nian Cheng said lying on the upper bunk.Baijia gave her a white look. "In our tribe, New Year's Eve is a critical moment to fight the evil spirits in the mountains. Men must be fully armed, while women are ready to cast spells in the net to imprison the captured evil spirits..." Si Ting said no Stop, maybe her name is just to remind her to think about when to stop. "What do you think, Siying? You know A Tuo better." Baijia paced back and forth, biting her fingers. I was drying my hair with a hair dryer, and it was slightly above my shoulders. "Anyway, A Tuo will definitely come up with a plan, so you don't have to worry." I smiled, I don't know if I should say about A Tuo's original idea, but Brother Bao is not familiar with Baijia, so he may not want to spend New Year's Eve with Baijia . "If you really don't have a plan, hee, then it's not bad to continue doing the puzzle in his room. Anyway, it will take a long time, and you can play with the carrot belly at the same time." Baijia said to herself. "Baijia, do you really like A Tuo? You seem to have frequent appointments this week." Si Ting couldn't help asking. "Well, I like it very much. Fortunately, my good sister Siying gave it to me." Baijia jumped up and down and kissed me lightly on the cheek. "Please..." I smiled wryly, and prayed in my heart that I would not be alone in the club classroom tomorrow night. <46> On the last night of 2001, at ten o'clock, I put away the last soup plate in the coffee shop. There were only four people left in the shop, me, Albus, the proprietress, and the weird middle-aged man I mentioned who drank his wheatgrass Blue Mountain coffee without saying a word. Albus sealed the can of coffee beans, and I wiped the table. Both of them looked at the proprietress and the distraught middle-aged man. They sat at the small round table in front of the counter, and they were all silent. The man has been coming to the store for several weeks, ordering the same drink: "The Boss's Special". If I remember correctly, the last time he drank ginseng ginger coffee, the last time he drank pineapple iced drops, and tonight he tasted Wulin's unique glutinous rice ball coffee. But he is good, although he always looks like shit, but he is absolutely bottomless, and he doesn't say a word. I said that the proprietress respects the guests very much, and the guests don’t speak, so the proprietress will let him play tarot fortune-telling and the rice carving that she just fell in love with.Because of this, the two sat together silently for many days, and sometimes they sat still until closing time, and the proprietress signaled me and Albus to go first with her eyes, and she would lock the door after he had sat enough. "Would they sit until New Year's Eve?" I asked Albus with my lips. "Who knows what they're doing, maybe they've met each other a long time ago." Albus didn't have the heart to lip talk to me, so he said it directly. Later, we left first, leaving the host and guest who lost the game whoever spoke first to continue fighting in the store. 「等一下去哪跨年？跟阿拓吧？」阿不思将门带上时抛下一句。 「没啊，我要等泽于看看，他今天没来店里，说不定早就在社团教室用功了。」我问：「妳呢？要跟弯弯去蕾丝边吧参加跨年派对么？」 「嗯。」阿不思点了一根烟，酷酷走了。 ************* 还在学校的大家都已经集中在浩然图书馆前的广场参加跨年晚会，即将来到2002年的社团活动中心理所当然很冷清，只有楼下独自练习的小喇叭声陪着我。 真是好的不灵坏的灵。 电磁炉上的水滚了，我倒进冷冻汤圆，阖上无聊的经济学课本，打开收音机听广播无聊的读秒倒数，越发觉得自己可怜，尤其是窗外爆出一阵「新年快乐」的疯狂庆贺声。众人欢天喜地时的孤独，最是寂寞。 「新年快乐，李思萤。」我举起热开水，看着窗户玻璃上反射的自己。 到了深夜一点，我收拾好东西走出社团教室，搓着冷冰冰的手搭电梯。 「不晓得阿拓跟百佳现在在做什么？在拼拼图么？还是阿去暴哥那？」 我看着手机上一大堆新年快乐的简讯，当然也包括百佳的。 手机里的简讯十个中有八个内容重复的转载，好像没有一心一意的独特对待。 阿拓却没捎来信息，想必正忙着。 The elevator door opened and the first floor arrived. 我才刚刚步出活动中心，眼睛都亮了。 泽于背着睡袋，将停在环校道路旁的车子门关上。 「嗨，学妹。」泽于看见我站在活动中心门口，向我挥挥手。 「学长新年快乐。」我挥挥手，心里开心极了。 「对喔，我差点忘了，新年快乐！」泽于走向我，表情略微失望：「不过，妳要走了？」 「嗯，一个人在上面好无聊。」我承认，我的脑筋动的不够快，没及时想出去又往返的好理由。 「想睡了吗？」泽于问，走向大门旁的电梯，按下。 I shake my head.这倒是真的，就算回到宿舍第一件事也是写小说。 「这样的话，可以陪我说说话吗？」泽于苦笑，电梯门打开。 我张大眼睛，想从他的苦笑中看出里面含藏的意义。 他很疲倦，有些黑眼圈，眼中也有些红血丝。 看来有一层厚厚的心事堆栈在他的疲倦背后。 「拜托啰，别让我新的一年第一个愿望就落空了。」泽于走进电梯。 <47> 我当然又回到了辩论社社窝。 虽然迟了一个多小时，但对爱情来说，永远一点都不嫌晚。 泽于去长廊尽头冲泡面，问我饿不饿，我迟疑了一下，不知道要不要把我吃了汤圆的事情说出来，但他误以为是少女的矜持，于是提出我意想不到的邀请。 「我记得柜子里还有筷子，我们一起吃一碗吧，反正我也不是说很饿。」泽于将阿Q桶面放在和式桌上，露出好好吃的表情。 我心里傻了一下，但双手却毫不考虑打开柜子，拿出一双免洗筷，坐下。 「怎么没有跟女朋友跨年？要可怜兮兮到社窝里嗑泡面。」我问，双手捧着热热的泡面桶子取暖。 「分手了，所以嗑泡面庆祝一下。」泽于苦哈哈地说。 我心里再度傻了一下，但外表不动声色，只是看着他。 「妳好像已经习惯我一直换女朋友了？可是我自己却从来没习惯过。」 泽于自嘲，将泡面盖打开，热气将他的眼镜镜片雾花了。 「我没习惯过啊，只是替你觉得习惯罢了。这次还是不想说分手的理由吗？」我吐吐舌头。 「妳想听吗？失恋的男人可是啰哩啰唆的不得了，跟老妈子一样。我之所以连续换了两次宿舍，就是因为连续遇到失恋的室友，烦都烦死了。」泽于将眼镜摘下，夹起面。 「说吧，不过我要收费，我小时候的志向可是心理辅导师。」我笑笑，骗人的。 「吃啊，如果不嫌弃的话，我用半碗泡面抵心理谘商的费用怎样？」泽于将面桶递过来，在那一瞬间我们的距离突然变得很近。 泽于说，他在感情上一直有很严重的不安全感。 这令我很意外，这么帅又有车开，还随时搭配金城武的笑容，这样的男孩应该将不安全感留给身边的女孩，而不是自己。 他说，他明白自己看起来是个很nice的人，所以更想表现出自己的好，因为他听过太多金玉其外败絮其中之类的质疑。这令家庭环境良好的他一直耿耿于怀。 小学的时候，他邀请同班同学到家里作客，结果第二天「杨泽于家里很有钱」这句话就取代了他的个性跟成绩，变成他唯一的注册商标，大家礼遇他，他就越觉得不自在，想跟大家打成一片的欲望变成他成长过程的最大目的。 泽于希望周遭的人喜欢他，真心真意地喜欢跟他在一起，这样的希冀放在男女交往上演变成一种严格的自我要求：「讨人喜欢」。 泽于每跟一个女孩在一起，都希望能在最短的时间内让对方认同自己、不被讨厌，于是不敢在对方面前表露自己真正的喜好。 比如逛街，如果对方一步都没踏进过书店，他便不会提起「要不要一块进去挑本书看」这样的要求，但如果对方曾在皮包店驻足许久，下次他便会直接牵着对方进最好的皮包店绕绕。 又比如喝咖啡，泽于都点双份对方喜欢的种类，只有在一个人的时候才能够很自然表现自己，来上一杯香味缤纷的肯亚。 「如果不喜欢这样的自己，改掉这种习惯不就好了吗？」 「我自己也知道这很不正常，但我想无可救药的意思就是根治不了吧。」 这样的他爱得很辛苦，尽管每次恋情的一开始都让他雀跃不已。 爱上对方喜欢的事物并不是件容易的事，但他总能够以最宽容的心去接受，但将自己伪装久了，会越不敢表露原来的自己，因为对方已经深深爱上另一个伪装过的他。 跟他在一起最久的梅蓁学姊，两人都拥有相同的喜好：「辩论赛」，于是泽于曾将她当作生命历程中不可多得的伴侣，但梅蓁整天将「对方辩友」挂在嘴巴上，泽于也听到烦了，他发觉尽管双方有共同的喜好，但喜好进入生命的深浅仍决定了在一起的感觉，会不会腻，能不能持久。 每次交往到了泽于不能忍受自己伪装的极限时，他就会提出分手，分得让对方错愕不已，有一次还被甩了两个巴掌。 「那这次呢？我记得她是个肢体语言很丰富的女孩子，能言善道的。」我不只记得，还每个礼拜至少见她一次。 「嗯，她是世新口语传播系的，也在一些剧团参加表演，为了她，我还去看剧团演出，还演过一棵布景树。」泽于的筷子跟我的筷子在泡面桶里轻轻触碰。 「那为什么会分手呢？因为你不喜欢演树？其实你喜欢演石头？」我笑道。 我们都笑了起来，最后的一口面，他还让给了我。 2002年的初晨，很高兴我选择了待在社窝，而寂寞并没有选择了我。 没有人陪我跨年倒数，但心上人跟我共享了同一碗热腾腾的面。 还有他藏在心底的恋爱秘密。