Chapter 4 Chapter two

It had been a long time since the parting, and Qiu Qingzhi never dared to turn on the radio.That night, he drove through Prince Edward Road in Kowloon.As the moonlight gradually darkened, he resolutely turned on the radio in the car.Xia Xinju's deep and affectionate voice floated in the air.Was that the voice he used to be so familiar with? Missing, suddenly flooded. A girl said on the show that she would spend her whole life waiting for her married boyfriend. Xia Xinju said: "You are just thinking that he will choose you in the end; if you don't have the hope of getting married, how can you spend your whole life waiting for you?"

The girl said: "Waiting is a dedication to love, and there is no need for results." Qiu Qingzhi smiled faintly.Men don't wait.A man will live his life with nostalgia for a lost relationship while also loving other women.Waiting is a woman's specialty. However, Qiu Qingzhi had a time of waiting. When the four of them lived together in the old house on Prince Edward Road, for a period of time, he had to be on duty all night.The time to get off work is just about the same as that of Xia Xinju who was doing an all-night show at that time.The twilight in the morning often made the pleasant walk between them.He ran into her twice on his way home.Later, he began to long to meet her on that road.If he couldn't see the land when he came home that morning, he would even deliberately slow down, or simply drink a cup of coffee at the small shop by the roadside, procrastinating for a little time, hoping to see her go home.Every time, when she met him there, she laughed and said:

"Why did I meet you again? What a coincidence!" What she thought was a coincidence was nothing more than his waiting. On the small road home, facing the morning dew, two people who just got off work, forgetting their physical fatigue, chatted about their favorite music.Sometimes, Qiu Qingzhi even just quietly listened to Xia Xinju's words.Her voice was soft and affectionate, like a clear stream, flowing through his body, touching all his senses, and singing in his ears.He knew that one day, she would become the most popular voice in Hong Kong.When she was frustrated by personnel disputes at work, Qiu Qingzhi always comforted her like this.

The seasons change, he and Xia Xinju have walked through many dawns side by side on that road.Every time, he felt that the road was too short and the time was too short. Back home, they each went to their own rooms.Many times, Sun Huaizhen would smile and ask: "Why do you always meet by chance?" At that moment, Xia Xinju was sleeping beside Meng Chengxi. That period of time with her was pleasant and ambiguous, and also a little guilty.If he hadn't been waiting, but had just been lucky enough to meet her, he might not have felt guilty.However, the encounter with a sense of guilt is the sweetest.

Since there are sweet times, there are also lost times.Qiu Qingzhi told himself that he just liked to chat with her.He and she will never have that possibility, not from the very beginning. It was an evening in autumn, and there were only him and Xia Xinju at home.In the room, he suddenly heard a song coming out of the turntable, which was Dan Fogelberg's "Longer".Isn't that a beloved vinyl record he lost many years ago?He comes out of the room.Xia Xinju sat in front of the old record player next to the platform.She hugged her knees and rocked, the twilight of the setting sun turning her face a bright orange.

"Do you have this record too?" Qiu Qingzhi asked. She nodded: "Do you have it too?" "I've lost that one and can't find it anymore. Do you like this song too?" She smiled and said, "Who doesn't like it?" He looked at her, and for a moment, Qiu Qingzhi was filled with sad regret.He tried his best to hide this regret deeply so that she would not find out.He often teased himself that his slight misery was nothing more than manly affection.How could he destroy two relationships because of his own selfishness?Besides, Xia Xinju might not have fallen in love with him.

Alas, one day he couldn't help laughing at how stupid his own greatness was. That night, Qiu Qingzhi returned home and found that Sun Huaizhen had disappeared.His two shirts were washed and put on the bed, but she took all her own things.At that moment, he subconsciously rushed into Meng Chengxi and Xia Xinju's room. Only Xia Xinju's shoes were placed on the ground.There was a sky blue envelope on the pillow, it was for Xia Xinju, it was in Sun Huaizhen's handwriting.Sun Huaizhen and Meng Chengxi left together. Qiu Qingzhi sat in the dark living room, angry and sad.He always thought that his feelings for Xia Xinju were unjustified and sinful.Meng Chengxi and Sun Huaizhen had an affair behind his back.This shameless man actually abducted his girlfriend.Why did he think of it now?

During the days when the four lived together, Sun Huaizhen and Meng Chengxi were in charge of cooking.Both of them like to cook?Sun Huaizhen's dishes are delicious.When she is in a good mood, she will cook her best stewed duck with red wine and chestnuts.The aroma of red wine often filled the room, and they had eaten the spirit of many ducks. Every time, Qiu Qingzhi and Xia Xinju could only wash the dishes.Neither of them can cook, they can only eat.When washing dishes, he likes to use the pot with a handle as a guitar, and the pot without a handle as her drum.While they were washing the dishes, the other two chatted in the living room.He heard Meng Chengxi and Sun Huaizhen talking happily.Sometimes, he gets a little bit jealous, what are they talking about?They seemed so speculative.Now he understands that the two people in the kitchen were deceived.The two people outside the kitchen were already flirting.Qiu Qingzhi thought that his jealousy was petty, didn't he also have a little ambiguous affection for Xia Xinju?So he also guessed Meng Chengxi like this.It turned out that his feeling was not wrong.

Sun Huaizhen left without a sound.She hadn't gotten up that morning when he left for work.He patted her arm and she fell asleep with his back.Maybe, at that time, she was not asleep, she just couldn't look at him again.When the affection changes, everything becomes the past.Even with a farewell smile, she couldn't pay anymore. Qiu Qingzhi remembered.During the days when they lived together, he and Meng Chengxi often went to the nearby court to play basketball.Every time they play, they talk about a lot of things.He told Meng Chengxi that his first girlfriend was his college classmate.

"Are we meeting again?" Meng Chengxi asked. "I haven't seen her for a long time, I don't know what she has become now." "Will you see her again?" "When luck is low, maybe we will see her again." Qiu Qingzhi joked. Meng Chengxi's basketball is very good, and he is not weak.What he enjoyed more was the time the two men spent together.Sometimes, it happens that there is a match on the field, they will sit in the audience and linger, and Sun Huaizhen and Xia Xinju will come to catch them and go home for dinner.The two men were dragged home by two women nagging, like a naughty boy caught by his mother, and there was no way to escape.

How nostalgic were those days? One night, he and Meng Chengxi had a little argument while playing basketball.He pushed Meng Chengxi, and Meng Chengxi bumped him hard with his shoulder. He staggered back a few steps, unwilling to take the basketball back from Meng Chengxi's hand, but Meng Chengxi deliberately threw the basketball far away. of. "What do you mean?" Qiu Qingzhi said angrily. "No more." Meng Chengxi turned around and left. After walking a few steps, Meng Chengxi suddenly picked up the basketball and walked back, saying guiltily: "Sorry." It was he who pushed Meng Chengxi first, and everyone was at fault.Meng Chengxi apologized to him, but he was a little embarrassed. Now he understands.Meng Chengxi's "I'm sorry" was not for knocking him down, but for Sun Huaizhen. When Xia Xinju came back, she opened the envelope, the letter was written by Sun Huaizhen.She wrote that she could no longer remember why she fell in love with him.There are many reasons for falling in love with Meng Chengxi. How cruel she was that she couldn't even remember his love. She left a letter to Xia Xinju, but she didn't leave a single word to him.Maybe, she didn't feel sorry for him at all. Then, Xia Xinju sat on the table and began to cry, and Qiu Qingzhi also cried.The two betrayed people complained to each other, but in the end they hugged each other and cried bitterly.Now, only the two of them are left in the house. One night, Qiu Qingzhi slumped on the sofa and listened to a song, which was "Longer".Everlasting, how can there be such a long vow?Xia Xinju who was sitting on the other side suddenly climbed onto him.She put her arms around him and kissed him madly. He took off her pants.They make love wordlessly.Apart from panting voices, there are no whispers or lyrical words.They even closed their eyes, unwilling to see the embarrassing self in each other's eyes.What is sex?The tenderness he had longed for was just a desperate whine.He can only use wilder movements to cover up his fragility.He didn't want to have sex, but he couldn't refuse her call.Which man can refuse a tearful woman rubbing his crotch with her body?It was not love that drove her to him, but vengeance.They use each other's bodies to take revenge on the two who betrayed them.Sex is a moment of redemption.In that moment, desperate flesh becomes desirable. Time and time again, they comfort each other in the most authentic way and sympathize with each other.After a lot of wordless sex, they started whispering and they started opening their eyes to see each other's poor bodies.In the end, the two people who stayed in the house depended on each other and comforted each other.They suddenly became inseparable. Didn't he remember the time when he waited early in the morning and then walked together?A moment of sexual pleasure, after an unknown number of years, suddenly turned into a long lingering.He loves to suck her tits, listening to her humming in his ears, it is the sound of nature in the world.He began to fear that this woman who stayed behind for revenge would leave him one day. In ordinary life, he tried his best to cling to her like a sucker, preventing her from leaving him.Does he love her?He no longer knows.He had never liked someone with such complicated feelings. Does Xia Xinju love him?He dared not ask for evidence.After those two people left, they became two lonely people.Xia Xinju never introduced him to her friends and family, he just met her sister.She always made him feel that Meng Chengxi was the only one waiting in her heart. One day, Qiu Qingzhi received a letter from Japan.The letter was written by Sun Huaizhen. At this moment, Qiu Qingzhi knew that he no longer hated Sun Huaizhen.When he and Sun Huaizhen met, everyone was so young, everyone might be looking for it.Who can know the future?They just met at a certain period of time in their lives, like a smear of oil paint left on a canvas, it is just one of the colors in a canvas. When Xia Xinju came back, Qiu Qingzhi hurriedly hid the letter. "What did you put away?" Xia Xinju asked. "Oh, nothing." He lied. "Do you have a vacation?" "Do you want to travel?" "Well, we've never traveled together before." He said happily, "Okay, where do you want to go?" "Tokyo." He was startled: "Tokyo?" "Don't you like Tokyo?" "no no." "I've never been to Tokyo!" "Then let's go to Tokyo!" "Great!" she said excitedly. Why is it Tokyo?Some kind of coincidence, or unexplained telepathy? Qiu Qingzhi deliberately booked a hotel in Ikebukuro instead of staying in Shinjuku.However, if you go to Tokyo, it is impossible not to go to Shinjuku.Fortunately, during the three days in Tokyo, they did not meet Meng Chengxi and Sun Huaizhen. One night before leaving, they were tired from shopping in Shinjuku and walked into a Starbucks.When Xia Xinju was still hesitating which kind of coffee to drink, the waiters in the store gathered together tacitly and shouted: "Last Order!" It turned out to be eleven fifteen in the evening.This is presumably a coffee shop tradition. "You can still have a drink, what do you want to drink?" He asked Xia Xinju. Xia Xinju's face suddenly turned pale, and she said, "Don't drink." After returning from Tokyo, she has become very silent. The moment that Qiu Qingzhi had foreseen finally arrived. One night they were having dinner at an Italian restaurant.Xia Xinju told him that she wanted to move back to live with her sister. "If we don't separate, we may never be able to separate again. One day in the future, we will blame each other." Xia Xinju smiled melancholy. Qiu Qingzhi didn't ask her to stay.Maybe she was right, if she continued, one day, she would blame him.In her heart, he was only the second choice.They just walked together helplessly. He was silent, and he couldn't even say anything to persuade him. From a long time ago, he loved Xia Xinju.Even if she's just using him for revenge, he's still hopelessly in love with her.He grew more and more afraid of losing her.Once, when they finished making love, he cooked a bowl of Yangchun noodles for her to eat.This is the first time he cooks for her.She sat on the bed, crying while eating noodles. "Don't be so nice to me." She said bitterly to him. Why did she say this to him?Why can't he be nice to her?Is it because she is not in love with him? No matter how hard he tried, what she was looking for in him was nothing more than a comfort.When the time comes, she will still leave.He suddenly became depressed.Perhaps, in her heart, he was just using her to take revenge.She made him feel that she would use all her strength to deny this love.He is passive and has no choice.It turns out that when you love someone, even suffering is a kind of happiness. "Didn't we go to Starbucks that night in Shinjuku?" Xia Xinju said. "yes." "Do you remember they shouted last order together?" "Ok." "These two words suddenly woke me up. Are you and I going to continue like this? Is this our last order? I don't want this." She said bitterly. He thought that the biggest danger they faced in Shinjuku was meeting Meng Chengxi and Sun Huaizhen; he didn't expect that there were some things that he couldn't escape or predict. On the day of parting, Qiu Qingzhi accompanied Xia Xinju and waited for the bus by the side of the road.When the car came, he saw tears in Xia Xinju's eyes.He wanted to hear her voice one last time, but she didn't say anything, and he didn't know what to say.It's too late to tell her not to go now. Xia Xinju forgot to take away an album on the turntable, which was "Longer" by Dan Fogelberg.After the two relationships ended, what he got was a piece of "Forever and Forever". Sometimes fate likes to play tricks on him. After Xia Xinju left, he also left the house. For a long time, Qiu Qingzhi didn't dare to turn on the radio.Especially on lonely nights, when he was alone at home or in the car, he was very afraid of hearing Xia Xinju's voice; he was afraid that he would be unable to restrain himself from picking up the phone to find her. However, that night, he went to an assembly of an old classmate.That classmate lived in Prince Edward Road, so he once again walked through the place he used to walk every day.He missed her whispering in his ears, he turned on the radio, and heard her familiar voice circulating in the car.His vision was right, she was now one of the hottest voices in Hong Kong, hosting a nightly prime-time show. Does she have someone she loves now? What does this have to do with him?Her voice has become a memory. Then one day, when he was about to leave work, Qiu Qingzhi suddenly received a call from Xia Xinju.She had just come back from Japan and was at the airport, asking him if she could meet.What reason does he have to refuse? Around the restaurant at the airport, Qiu Qingzhi saw Xia Xinju again.It's been a long time, and he just mustered up the courage to listen to her voice again not long ago, but he didn't expect that she was sitting in front of him now, touching all his senses again. Xia Xinju told him that she saw Sun Huaizhen and Meng Chengxi working part-time at a soup noodle shop in Shinjuku, and their life might not be very good. "I know," he said. "You know?" she was surprised. "Huaizhen wrote me a letter. That's when I knew they were in Japan, where they worked and studied." "Why didn't you tell me?" she asked. "I'm afraid that you will go to Meng Chengxi, I'm afraid that I will lose you." He finally said. She looked at him for a long time, her lips trembling. She never took her eyes off him, and he lowered his eyelids to look at his bewildered hands. Why did he say it? He looked at her and smiled apologetically. Xia Xinju lowered her head, then raised it again.Did his confession shock her too much?Was she blaming him for hiding the news, or was she flashbacks on him? In the past, every morning against the dew, Qiu Qingzhi stood in the small shop by the road and waited for her while drinking coffee.When he saw Xia Xinju coming back, he pretended to meet her by chance, and then walked with her on that path.Those ambiguous and pleasant times later transformed into two bodies that comfort each other. Those interdependent days were not indulgences, but discoveries.He was so terrified of losing her that he had to use moment after moment of tenderness to prolong what was understood to be a period of sadness indulging in vengeance.One day, he suddenly realized that it was not a moment; it was a long lingering.From their acquaintance to their separation, they have not given up yet. Forever and ever, what a desolate longing? After many wordless sex, he fell in love with her. He thought that the joy of sex was the only salvation, but it turned out that the only real salvation is love.