Reason for selection: When I wrote this novel, I was exactly eighteen years old. Compared with my fourteen-year-old self, I gained a lot and lost a lot at the same time.So I wrote about these two girls. In fact, whether Beijie or Moezi, they are all me. Later, this novel won many awards. A writer friend who has won many awards once said to me: Rao Xueman, this novel has influenced my writing all my life. At that time we were all young and young, and now we are all passing through. Fortunately, there are texts to testify that we are still young. The first time Moeko and I met was because she played a small conspiracy, and I, who was always smart, fell into her conspiracy very illogically.

It's very simple. That time she wrote a long letter like a torrential rain, stating to me all the reasons why she no longer wants to live in this world.At the end of the letter, I skillfully added this sentence: My only wish now is to see you before I die. I am an eighteen-year-old girl, a sophomore in high school.A little different from others is that I prefer to write novels.When I was 14 years old, I wrote my first novel "In Time of Youth" and won an award. Since then, writing has become the best way for me to entrust my dreams and relieve my loneliness. But ever since my name was crowned with the title of "Young Writer", I started to feel bored and bored.In my mind, writers all have a broad forehead of wisdom, and wisdom that has gone through vicissitudes of life in their clear eyes. I know that I don’t have these, and I am afraid that others will call me that, and feel flustered like a thief.

Moeko's letter was written without these things, just telling her own story, and her feelings were handled properly and reasonably.It's just that it was not written in the letter: My only wish now is to see you before I die. I went to my appointment without any doubts. I recognized Moeko by my keen intuition from a long distance away.A very tall girl with colorful butterflies dancing in a large floral dress, with crooked eyes, and a cunning and coquettish expression unique to a fourteen-year-old girl. Kill me and I don't believe that such a girl would commit suicide. Seeing me, she ran over from there, grabbed my arm and screamed affectionately and exaggeratedly: "I knew you would definitely come, wow! I can't believe it, I can't believe it..."

I realized that I was being cheated, and said angrily, "I'm not a big star who makes you dizzy from time to time, so there's no need to go to such lengths." "I don't have any sense of humor at all. It's not like your novel." She criticized me vaguely. Seeing me silently staring at her, she let go of my hand, lowered her head to wrong him and said, "I like you." I wrote novels, but my classmates said that you never answered the letters I wrote to you." "It's not right for you to lie, don't do this in the future." Mengzi is bright and vivid, very much like me before. I fell in love with her in an instant, and I couldn't help but play the role of my sister.

"I know." She kept nodding, like a little boy who has done something wrong and sincerely repented.After a while, she became active again, and asked me in a hurry: "Sister Li, tell me what happened between the ages of fourteen and eighteen. Is it as beautiful as in your novels?" I didn't know how to answer for a while, so I just took the initiative to shake her hand.Slowly said: "I'm afraid you have to experience it yourself." Mengzi's hands were dry and soft, and as soon as he held them, he knew they were spoiled hands. She was very dissatisfied with my answer, flattened her lips but then giggled again immediately.I asked her what she was laughing at, and she put her hand on my head and said, "Didn't you notice? I am much taller than you." After speaking, she laughed again, youthful and innocent as hell.

I chatted with Moeko for a long time that day. She is a talkative girl but she is not boring at all.The topics are also very fresh, such as her Chinese teacher wearing a wig that doesn't look good at all, and the neighbor Ah San raises a dog and makes a fortune and doesn't look at people seriously.Later, she insisted on sending me downstairs to my house. I ran to the balcony to say goodbye to her. She narrowed her eyes and waved to me. Her young face and beautiful flower skirt were bathed in the golden sunset. So Moeko and I became friends, a sophomore in high school and a sophomore in junior high school.She looked for the brilliance and arrogance that eighteen years old should have in me, and I recalled the innocence and warmth of fourteen years old from her.Friendships that complement each other make us very happy.

Of course, later I told Lin Mu about Mengzi, about the acquaintance due to deception.Lin Mu couldn't stop laughing when he heard this, and said mockingly: "You still believe it, don't you know that nine out of ten girls who call suicide are just bluffing? Trying to shock the whole world to cry for her!" Lin Mu is not only extreme but also old-fashioned, I am too lazy to argue with him.She didn't even bother to give him a blank stare. Speaking of Lin Mu, I always feel that there is a long story.We are neighbors.We have been classmates since elementary school.When I was young, I was a very difficult girl. When I was in the second grade, I fought with two boys because of a trivial matter in full view. One was scratched by me, and the other was even worse. I pushed her into the front of the classroom. Xi Xi gutter.The worse person is Lin Mu.After he got up, he didn't file a complaint, and he didn't take any retaliatory actions afterwards. It was just that until he graduated from elementary school, he always kept a tense face when he saw me, as silent as an enemy.

After entering junior high school, Lin Mu grew taller all of a sudden, became tall and straight, and his personality became much more lively.When I first showed my prowess in writing, Lin Mu's expertise in mathematics gradually became apparent, and he participated in several mathematics-related competitions and happily won the first prize.But he couldn't learn English well, not to mention bad pronunciation, and his grammar was always confused.Once, an English teacher was asked to do a very simple multiple-choice question about on top of and on the top of. This stupid donkey didn't know the answer after thinking for a long time, and finally wrote a math question on it. The empty set symbol "?" made the whole class reel from laughter.He and I are just the opposite. No matter how I change ABC, I can’t beat me, but I’m always lame in mathematics. If I can get sixty points in the exam, I’m considered to be doing well.

So Lin Mu and I naturally formed a "mutual aid group" to study together. There were 7 boys and one girl, and there was a lot of gossip at first.People also wrote words like "××love××shameless" on the wall.But we are all "thick-skinned" people. After a few years, the rumors and slanders have been exhausted and disappeared, but our friendship has survived and become very relaxed and comfortable. Since Lin Mu forgot about the incident in the second grade of elementary school, she often said that I was a good girl, lively, cheerful and helpful, but I should not write novels.Lin Mu also looked down on my novels at all, thinking that they were "fake things to deceive people when you are full and have nothing to do".As for my dear readers, he called them even more mercilessly "blind lot."

Moeko always appears in front of me when I don't expect it.When she knocked on the door on Zhou Wei, Lin Mu was teaching me to do those messy math test papers, which made me dizzy.Mengzi descended from the sky like a rescuer, and brought a large bag of delicious beef jerky.This time I was very happy and had a reason not to study, but Lin Mu seemed to be even happier. It seems that teaching me mathematics is not a very happy thing. I told Mengzi to sit down, and Lin Mu stood up and said goodbye with great interest. As soon as he walked to the door, he suddenly turned around and asked Mengzi, "You—the one who is going to commit suicide?" Once, there was a "crack".

Mengzi gave him a hard look, then turned to scold me: "Big mouth!" Lin Mu left contentedly.I invited Moezi into my hut, sat face to face, each had a cup of tea, and munched on the prison beef jerky. "Is he Lin Mu?" Mengzi asked. "you recognize?" "What's your relationship?" Moeko seemed to be interrogating a prisoner. "Classmates, neighbors." I answered honestly. "That's all?" "That's all." Moezi didn't believe it, and asked me, "Why don't you be his girlfriend?" "Why should I be his girlfriend?" I couldn't help but laugh. "He's very handsome," Mengzi pretended to be fascinated. "I saw him on TV. He answered almost all the interesting math problems." Yeah?Why didn't I know that Lin Mu was so famous. "I came to you because I encountered some troubles." Mengzi sat up straight and got to the point. "Falling in love?" I asked intentionally. "You are so old-fashioned." She laughed at me, and then told me that the thing is like this, she has a best friend named Tomoko, and she has always regarded her as her closest friend.One day Tomoko suddenly proposed to exchange diaries with her. "I was very happy at first," Moeko said. "I wanted to know what a girl my age was thinking, whether she was the same as me. Tomoko was someone I trusted, so I agreed." Find yourself being lied to.The diary that Tomoko gave her in exchange was fake. No wonder there is no meaning at all, no excitement.And her real diary is very beautiful and high-end, it can also be locked, and has been quietly hidden in her schoolbag... "I've never been deceived like this before," Moezi said sadly, like the panic of being robbed of everything. "Sister Li, I want revenge, you tell me how to do it." "Moezi," I sat next to her and lovingly hugged her shoulders, "but you can only handle this matter with tolerance." "Why?" She raised her head and looked at me with wide eyes in bewilderment. "Listen to me, the matter is over, it cannot be redeemed by "revenge". I believe Sophon's nature is not bad, and your tolerance will make her feel guilty sooner or later." "Really?" she wondered. "Yes." I said, "Just remember the lesson from this time. Later, you will find that many things are not as perfect as you imagined. There is always a price to pay for growth. Maintaining a tolerant love is more important than anything else." .” "I'll give it a try." Moeko forced him to say.When parting, she asked me solemnly: "Sister Li, what is the "price" you mentioned, and will it always make people unhappy?" "Silly girl," I tousled her short disheveled hair, "don't worry about it, growth is a kind of happiness after all." She seemed to believe what I said, turned her worries into joy and went downstairs humming a song.Listening to Mengzi's brisk footsteps and thinking about what I just said to her, I don't even know whether I should teach her that way or not.In fact, I am only an eighteen-year-old girl, and like Mengzi, I also look forward to someone relying on someone to guide my life, but everyone thinks that I am very mature, including my parents, and they cannot see the work Behind me also has a face that is often panicked. Maybe, maybe Lin Mu knew. I remember that it was an early summer morning, and the thin morning mist shrouded it like a veil.Lin Mu and I were walking on the way to school.The wind is very soft, there are no vehicles passing by on the road, and there is only a faint fragrance of dampness in the air. It is really a very peaceful and wonderful summer morning.I felt very relaxed, and opened my arms to face the sky as I walked, like a lyrical heroine in a long TV series. Lin Xiu suddenly asked me nonchalantly: "Bei Jie, are you eighteen years old?" "Yes." I said. "Do you know you're famous?" "Know." "Are you tired?" He suddenly asked these three words in an unprecedented tone, which shocked me a lot. "Why do you ask this?" I smiled and avoided the topic, but my heart throbbed hard. In fact, I really wanted to say that Lin Mu was tired, I was really tired, but I couldn't say it, and I didn't know why I just can't say it. Maybe, I'm just afraid to let others know that I need to understand too. It's a pity that Lin Mu is not the prince charming I imagined, we are completely different and have nothing to do with each other, otherwise I would have an arm that can cry at will.Fortunately, Lin Mu is not the Prince Charming I imagined. A person with rich emotions like me can easily fall into misunderstandings and get lost. At the end of the day, I'm proud and grateful to have this friendship, everything is pure as crystal. The summer vacation came very quickly, and the exams were over in one fell swoop.Because the school building is undergoing a major renovation, the summer tutoring that Lei could not get rid of before has also been cancelled.I got letters from several magazines asking me to go to their summer camps and stuff, but I wasn't in the mood.The mediocre final exam results, the hidden gloomy eyes of my parents, and the upcoming third year of high school often made me feel at a loss when I thought about it.I was originally an elegant and free-spirited girl, who really possessed enough vanity that an eighteen-year-old girl should have. Countless readers wrote to praise me for my clear mind and unstained worldliness, so I can write light and transparent words.But I’m just an ordinary person after all. Recently, I’ve always thought vulgarly that if I don’t pass the college entrance examination, everything will be over. I want to go to college, the Chinese Department of Fudan University, and I want to die. So I threw myself into mathematics throughout the holiday, and often spent half a day on a topic that I couldn't figure out. Lin Mu said that I worked hard like a "red-eyed gambler", a very old-fashioned adjective, but said Makes me sad. "Beijie," he said, "you worry about gains and losses, so you are mentally exhausted. Don't you still tell others in the novel that youth is fair and everything can't be rushed?" Lin Mu remember the words in my novel?How come I don't even remember myself? "Yes," I said, "I want to see Mengzi." Mengyu makes me feel relaxed and happy, but after such a long vacation, she never came to see me once. Could it be that the little girl grew up overnight? Need any more help and comfort?I don't like this feeling of being forgotten, and I feel extremely sad. "Your friend," Lin Mu hesitated, "I seem to have seen it somewhere." "Where?" "Blue Dream Bar. I've seen her in uniform talking to someone at the door from there." "You mean Moeko works as a waiter in a bar!" I was shocked and almost jumped up. "There's nothing wrong with working during the summer vacation. Isn't work-study program always advocated?" Lin Mu said slowly. No, I cannot accept it.Moezi can do whatever she wants, but she can't go to places where all kinds of teachings and nine streams gather. "Blue Dream" is a notoriously chaotic place.Moezi is like the shadow of my past, I love her, she is like my own sister, I will never allow her to walk through such a crowd with heavy makeup, absolutely not. I told Lin Mu that I was going to "Lanmeng", and he asked me if I needed to accompany him, and I said no, just go back and memorize a few more English words. "Mengzi has the right to make her own choice, don't force her too much." He warned me.I nodded and went out alone with an umbrella.At noon, there were few pedestrians on the street, the sun was very poisonous, and it shot on me alone, and my heart was full of disappointment with Mengzi. When I got to "Blue Dream", I stepped in without hesitation, and looked around for the fourteen-year-old girl who was wearing a black-and-white uniform like other waiters in the mist of tobacco and alcohol and the noise of music.It was probably due to the air conditioner installed inside, the sudden cold and sudden heat made my body feel very uncomfortable. "Hi!" Someone patted me on the shoulder heavily from behind, and turned to see that it was Moeko, shaking an empty tray in his hand, looking at me with evil eyebrows. "Follow me, don't come here again." I cut to the chase. "Why, Sister Li, is it because I haven't come to see you for a long time? You see, I have a job now, and I really can't get away." "Moeko!" I was angry. "Sit down over there. I'm treating guests today. Hurry up, Sister Li." As she spoke, she pulled me to a seat in a remote place and quickly brought me a glass of iced drink with an unknown name. . "I knew you would object; that's why I didn't dare to tell you, but the holidays are too boring, and I want to make money to buy a good dress to wear." Moezi hurriedly explained. "If you're bored, you can read books and practice calligraphy. If you want to wear a dress, I'll buy it for you. Don't make it, okay? I almost begged her." She laughed mercilessly: "Why do you talk like my mother, luckily my mother didn't know, otherwise she would have beaten me to death!" "You're only fourteen," I reminded her. "Hush—" she stopped me, "keep your voice down, don't let the boss hear. Everyone here thinks I'm seventeen." "Look at this place, it's full of smoke. If you have to do it, why not go to the "Pearl of the Orient" or "Art City", which are both elegant and decent." "Will people want me? Believe it or not, the waiters in those places all have college diplomas," she sneered, "Besides, the salary here is quite high." "Moeko, you worry me." I said. "Trust me, I'll keep myself clean," she swore to me. I know it's superfluous to say anything else, Lin Mu is right, Mengzi has the right to choose.I stood up helplessly to say goodbye, Mengzi escorted me outside the door, the strong sunlight blinded me, I heard her leaning against the door and whispering: "Sister Li, I'm thinking maybe our fourteen years old won't be completely Similarly, society is progressing, I hope you understand me." "I'll give it a try." I said, imitating her tone. l "Thank you very much. Come and see me when you have time." Moezi shook my hand. It was still those dry and soft hands, but when she was fourteen years old, she wanted to support her whole life. I was very moved. l The times are advancing, is Mozi implying that I have fallen behind?When I was weaving my beautiful literary dream in my ivory tower, have I missed or misunderstood many characters or things that are ever-changing? When I got home, I immediately dug out my fourteen-year-old diary to read. I was eager to recall what I was thinking at that time, but I knew that I would not be the same as Moeko. Even Moeko saw this. Although we are only four years apart. I found that my diary at that time was very well written, and the writing style was as beautiful as it is now. I searched all over the diary and I couldn’t find a little bit of gray.But I didn’t deliberately pursue anything other than longing to grow up. Under the wings of my parents, I hoped to be independent but lived a regular life. Compared with Mengzi, I was a timid and peaceful child with a magnificent corolla.According to my current judgment, I still don't know whether it is me, Moeko, or both of us. The third year of high school finally came unstoppably. The night before school started, I announced to my parents that I planned not to write or read any extracurricular books this year, and I had to work hard.My parents were very appreciative and very happy. I knew that was what they had always wanted to say to me. It would be more reassuring for them to let me say it first. When I got to the class, I found that many people actually had the same mentality as me, with a mentality of fighting to the death.It seems that only Lin Mu is the most relaxed. Apart from seeing him holding an English book to read, he didn't work hard. At noon, I also found that he often went to the laser hall on the street to watch videos or listen to concerts. "Humbleness makes people progress, and arrogance makes people fall behind." I said to him once, "Don't run counter to reality." "It's nothing to me, isn't it the same as before, why do you make yourself so nervous." He didn't understand. Of course, Lin Mu is different from me. He is very good at mathematics. Except for English, he is not bad in other subjects. His grades have been in the top position since he was a child.And I never cared about my grades, and it didn't matter if I was close to it. Am I not as radiant and admired by others?I'm very annoyed that I didn't understand the importance and necessity of grades until now. It is my only pass to the outside world. I really envy Lin Mu. Mengzi, who was in the third grade of junior high school, grew taller again. On Tuesday afternoon, she rode a bicycle from her school to our school to find me.At that time, school was over, and I pestered the geography teacher in the classroom to ask the old man who couldn't figure out the airflow and wind direction.The geography teacher explained to me patiently. He is a teacher who likes students to ask questions. He often says that students who have no questions "suck".For the first time I stayed away from the word "sucks" in front of him.He seemed very happy, and when he left with the handout in his arms, he encouraged me excitedly: "Student Li Beijie, work hard, you must have a bright future!" I put on a grateful smile and sent him off. At this moment, Mengzi rushed in like a whirlwind: "I can't wait for you at the school gate for a long time. Fortunately, Lin Mu told me that you are in the classroom." "Where's Lin Mu?" "Playing basketball on the playground." "Sister Li," Mengzi walked up to my desk, "Look, there are so many!" As she said that, she took out a large handful of colorful banknotes from her pocket and put them on my desk.Money worship is very strong. "I earned it all myself!" She gasped and said to me. I was very moved by Mengzi's expression at that moment, but I still hit her: "What's the matter, I really haven't seen the world before." "Actually, you are also jealous of me, right?" She leaned in front of me, "How about it, can I invite you to watch a movie?" "I'm afraid not," I apologized. "I have a lot to do." "You're such a disappointment." She said angrily. "Saturday, perhaps?" "Maybe I won't be in this mood until that day. You are my respected friend, and I want to share happiness with you." She was stubborn. "I've already shared it, really, Moezi." I coaxed her, "We are connected, we don't have to watch movies." "You're such a disappointment," she repeated. Lin Mu came in sweating profusely, and after asking why, he "volunteered" to accompany Mengzi to the cinema.In the end, they really left me and left.Lin Mu was riding a bicycle, with Moezi riding behind him, ostentatiously driving across the city out of my sight. Moeko must be disappointed, but that's the only way to go.I have always been a person who abides by principles, and I clearly understand when to do and when not to do. I admire myself very much. However, I didn't realize that the stress I brought to myself during those days was enough to crush an elephant. The third year of high school is indeed the most special year in the ten-year cold window. Every ordinary student has a unique emotional story in this year. Witnessing every detail around me, I feel that I have never been so excited .On the eve of the midterm exam, inexplicable dreary fears and worries sneaked into my heart from time to time, so I gave up my "principle" and had no choice but to escape back to my novel.Using a pen to copy or transform my life makes me feel very safe, everything is safe and sound, I forget that I am walking in the third year of high school, walking in a vast rain and fog, either turning the clouds to see the sun or stepping into the mud. Lin Mu asked me if I was writing some novel again, I covered it up and he said why? I am too busy studying. "You liar," he said, "Do you know that every time you want to write something, you will hesitate for a long time with a special expression on your face. In this regard, you should not indulge yourself too much. If you have time, it is better to go to the scene like a cute child." Take it easy on the movie." "You mean I'm not easy?" "It's not easy, it's heavy." Lin Mu looked at me, "I'm still used to the old Bei Jie, a fierce and vicious little lunatic who sometimes cries and laughs." "At that time, I didn't need to take the college entrance examination, but now I want to take the college entrance examination." I defended feebly. Lin Mu laughed, and he could actually laugh.But after a while he said sincerely: "Life is not a novel, Beijie. Don't think that you will repeat those same stories and be the same tragic protagonist. You are very talented, take it easy and have a bright future." Another promising future!God knows what will happen if I really fail the ranking, what my parents will think, what Mengzi Lin Mu will think, what those other people will think, and what I will think myself. Just after the midterm exam, I received a letter from Moeko's trustee, like a telegram, telling me to go to her house no matter what.Then attach a note with the address.I guessed that it might be her birthday, and maybe the guests were full of wine and wine, so I went to the gift shop to wrap a gift and hide it in my schoolbag just in case. As soon as I walked to the door of her house, I knew that I was just being sentimental. The door opened, and Moeko sat alone on the carpet in the center of the room, waiting for me.Seeing me appear, I handed over a very contrived smile. I bent over to change my shoes, amazed that Mengzi has such a magnificent home, but there is some empty loneliness. Mengzi came to hug me from behind, and said in a melancholy voice, "Sister Li, I think I'm in love." The phone jumped up at this time, and Moeko let me go to answer it.I closed the door for her, and heard her talking over there, her voice was terribly loud, and it took me a long time to hang up. "The 'I'm afraid' phone?" I asked her. "No, my parents. They went to Shanghai and left me alone at home." "What do your parents do?" "" Do business. "Mengzi shrugged, unwilling to say more. Looking around, I realized that Moeko is actually a little princess who can get whatever she wants.Thinking of her being pitiful in the bar, he said that everything was just for a good dress, and thinking of her crying to me about her backache and having to soak her arms in cold water for ten minutes every day when she came home, I couldn't believe it. Moeko is just a little girl. "Sister Li," Mengzi said with some difficulty, "I was talking about Lin Mu just now." "Lin Mu?!" How could it be possible?He and Moezi just met two or three times and added a movie. "I think it must be love, I've been thinking about it day and night." She had a bitter face, unable to hide her panic. How could this Lin Mu be reasonable!When I go back, I have to settle accounts with him. "He is very knowledgeable and handsome," Mengzi continued, "The most important thing is that he is a little childish. I like a man who is a little childish." The more she said the more outrageous, I stopped her from talking. "Okay," I said. "I will explain it to Lin Mu for you." "It's none of his business, it's my own wishful thinking, please keep it a secret for me, okay?" Mengzi said softly.I have known her for so long, and I have never seen her so gentle. She is not at all like the Mengzi who was tricked into reading the diary. She even forgot the vigor of the excitement and lost her direction completely. My heart breaks, and then my heart aches. But I don't know what to do, I've never felt so incompetent.I can't even try to persuade her, because once I persuade her, I will fall into the cliché. Mengzi is no longer a little girl, so I can't perfunctory her. "I don't think I'm necessarily that stupid." Moeko rested her head on my shoulder, and her voice was as soft as a whisper.Then we just sat there in silence without saying anything.When the wall clock strikes six, the setting sun slowly sinks from the window.A faint reddish dances in the room, just like our different thoughts.I feel that Moezi's tears come and go, a strong and precocious girl is completing a difficult but necessary mental journey alone.I have imagined countless loves but I have never really loved, and I have never found anyone who I can care about day and night.The warmth transmitted from Mengzi made me vaguely feel that many of my ideas in the past were wrong. Young infatuation does not necessarily have to be crazy, obsessive, childish and ignorant. Mengzi and their generation are different from us Only four or five years old, but his thinking seems to have advanced for half a century.Thinking about these things, I suddenly realized that such a dusk would never happen again in my life, and my future is still very long, as the song says, "There is a winding and long path leading to the distance of mist", Taogu is blurred and uncertain. Compared with the college entrance examination, it is just a low wall that can be stepped over. Human beings are so strange, no matter how many admonitions and best examples, you may not be able to learn something.But you yourself can teach yourself how to grow up in a moment.The girl grows into a flower, beautiful and charming, kind-hearted, but strong like a tree standing before the storm. At eight o'clock, Moeko and I had a very rich and delicious dinner.I can hardly do anything except washing rice and vegetables.Moezi is an excellent cook, with quick hands and feet, and her sweet and sour pork ribs almost made me swallow my tongue. Across a pot of steaming soup, Moezi asked me, "Will you laugh at me?" "How come, I will forget about it." "You mean it's as simple as a wild goose crossing the cold lake?" "Goose crossing the cold pool?" "Yes, the wind blows and thins the bamboo, and the bamboo leaves no sound when the wind passes by; the geese cross the cold pool, but the geese leave without leaving a shadow. Is it really possible to look at some unhappy things so naturally? I hope I can quickly Digest it," she said. "What does Moeko want to do in the future?" I asked. "Teacher." She replied unexpectedly, "I want to be a good teacher and be a good friend to my students. I will teach them knowledge and solve their problems so that they can stay young forever." I am ashamed of myself. I used to think that I was Mengzi's good sister, and I was so proud that I could tell others what to do, but I never thought that the little girl would teach me more, more, and much more. Moezi sent me to the bus stop, and before I got on the bus, I took out the gift in my schoolbag and handed it to her: "I thought it was your birthday, so I prepared this, but it seems to be useful, Moeko, do you know? You've grown up." "Sister Li—." She was very excited, and hesitated to speak after receiving the gift. I patted her, turned around and jumped onto the stopped bus.The car puffed away, leaving Mozi's figure under the street lamp far away from my sight. I wanted to cry, but there were no tears.Moezi must have a good future, so good that we can't imagine it.I don't have to worry about her anymore, really, never. After getting off the bus, I found Lin Mu waiting for me at the station with a notebook in his hand. He greeted me happily, "I came back so late, your parents are very worried and asked me to pick you up." "No need," I shook my schoolbag, "I'm not a child." "You are," Lin Mu said seriously, "Actually, we all still are." I didn't say anything, just walked silently. "Did you fail the midterm exam?" He asked behind my back.Then he said: "Bei Jie, I always thought that you should step out of your novels. The most practical thing is to have one foot in the novel and one foot in life. What do you think?" I stand still.The autumn is thick and the night is fading. Many things that I have been avoiding flashed in Lin Mu's eyes.I really trust my sixth sense, it is absolutely accurate.Lin Mu does have an unknown secret, and that secret is inextricably linked to me. "What do you think?" He asked gently again. I nod.Ah, it doesn't matter, I know Lin Mu won't say it, at least he won't say it now.Lin Mu understands me as he understands himself. He is a good boy, and his tight-lipped rationality adds countless splendors to our youth. When I went upstairs, I opened the door and went in. Lin Muxiu was looking for his key profoundly. I closed the door and opened it again, stuck my head out and called him, "Hello, Lin Mu." "What?" He turned around. "Do you know what Yandu Hantan is?" He looked puzzled. I smiled and closed the door, Lin Mu will know, he will definitely understand when the sun rises day after day.There are so many things waiting for us to do that we cannot always indulge in one kind of glory or lose in one kind of pain.If all kinds of good or bad things can be left without leaving traces, let it be as peaceful and beautiful as a clear pool where flying geese have passed, and let a cheerful and carefree mood accompany us to live a brand new life. Suddenly, I suddenly remembered a sentence I once said to Mengzi: In the final analysis, growth is a kind of happiness. I wasn't sure before, but now I know I didn't lie to Moezi. As for whether there will be many ups and downs or undeniable sadness tomorrow. Who cares? The geese are crossing the cold pool. We have the confidence to control our own life in happiness.