Chapter 4 Chapter 2 Wang Haiyan (1)

Chapter 2 Wang Haiyan (1) I reached into the bookcase next to the desk for an English dictionary.I was just looking at the English multiple-choice question under my hand, and didn't pay much attention to the hand holding the dictionary—anyway, my bookcase, my dictionary, I know where it is. Those things are a nuisance--it's a good thing I'm no longer responsible for them.I was helping my deskmate to proofread her answers to extracurricular exercises, and she was always worried about her English level.I am so glad that I was the one who was admitted early.When a person no longer does the college entrance examination questions for the college entrance examination, those test questions seem less annoying.Where the hell is my old ODD?Mom must have been tidying up my bookcase again.She loves cleanliness, but she always helps more and more. I hope she won't touch my bookcase or anything in the future. I have to go and tell her tomorrow morning. After all, this is not what she manages in the department store. A few shelves—I'd love to talk about it now, but it's too late to wake her up.

what is this?Ah, it is the textbook of "New Concept English".Is this mine?When did I read this shit?This is book three.When did I read the third book?How did my mother put this useless old book in the dictionary? This is too outrageous.Oh, here, my name is still written here-what a childish word, why do I write so hard.Come to think of it, this should be when I was in the second year of junior high...Look, how careful I was in taking notes at that time...Oh, this is my favorite text, I remember it, it was very energetic, and it was a mess The scene of the book - this is the lesson, lesson 33, "A Day to Remember", "An Unforgettable Day" - let me look at it again, what does it say? “We have all experienced days when everything go wrong A day may begin well enough, but suddenly everythingse ems to get out of control.” “We have all experienced days when everything go wrong A day may begin well enough, but suddenly everythingse ems to get out of control.” Everything seems to be out of control."

Suddenly everything seems out of hand.Everything seems out of hand.Strange things these are--why should I have to read this passage in this old book today?Yes, this was my day -- today -- and suddenly everything seemed out of hand. I went to the broadcasting room to wait for Qin Yu.I agreed with him and told him to meet me there at noon.I sat there, waiting for him to knock on the door.I like this feeling very much: I am sitting on a chair, alone, looking out of the window - there is a big tree with no name outside the window, the extended branches almost reach the window lattice of the broadcasting room, this tree is so beautiful - I watched and watched and waited for a man to knock on the door, then I stood up and opened it for him.I imagined him standing outside the door with a polite, resentful look--a look he was used to wearing on his face.Admittedly, he can seem a little girly at times, especially when he wears this politely aggrieved look.Unfortunately, I really like this look on his face, I think he is sending me a message through this look, that he needs my comfort and help.

Yes, I am happy to wait for him.But what a disappointment it would be if I waited and waited and he never came.I am quite a keeper of appointments myself. As far as I can remember, I have never missed an appointment. My watch is always set forward by five minutes.I think the first and foremost thing a person needs to do if he wants to be treated as an adult is to be on time for appointments.But, my God, Qin Yu is always like a child, he can't do all the basic things, and he doesn't allow others to say that he is wrong, and he doesn't allow others to forgive him for his mistakes, and he carries his aggrieved face all day long ——I sometimes really don't understand why I should be nice to him.

I can't believe he didn't come!If he keeps me waiting for an hour and finally comes, I promise I'll never ask him why he's late, because--well, I hate to think--he's here anyway, he's Come on, that's enough.But he didn't come!Is there anything so important that he can't even come here and tell me that he doesn't have time?Even if it's just an ordinary friend, not missing appointments is the minimum requirement. I sat in that stupid broken chair and waited for him.I'm mad as hell.I said to myself, how could he do this to me! He really did this to me.I guess I should stop avoiding the obvious.Since he was warned and punished by the school, his attitude towards me has become worse day by day.At first I thought it was because he was in a bad mood, but that was by no means the main reason.I wanted to shed tears many times, and I had a very ominous premonition, haunting me like a nightmare.No, I don't want to say, I don't want to say, I don't want to say a word about this premonition, can't bring it to life, have to suppress it.But why is he ignoring me?Why do you want to break the appointment?Does he really not know how much I miss him?Could he really not feel the efforts I made?Or is it because he is just like a child who wants to vent his anger on others when he is hurt?He probably forgot that in those days I tried my best to inquire about the situation, which annoyed the dean.He forgot, he disappeared, I waited and waited alone, and I still have to say to myself that it’s okay—it’s okay—how can it be okay?

When I returned to the classroom, the whole class was buried in their homework. As soon as I entered the door, everyone raised their heads and focused their eyes on me.I always feel that there is a kind of helpless sorrow and jealousy in their eyes.Still, they're still really nice to me, just like they used to be.It's just that no matter who, when he is sweating profusely there, he sees that another person has already enjoyed the benefits with ease, of course he is a little uncomfortable. My deskmate hasn't come yet.Her home is very close to the school, and she does her homework at noon every day, and she doesn't come until class time; she loves home too much, and thinks that everything is done at home most efficiently.I often tell her that a person should develop the ability to isolate himself from the outside world, so that he can reach his best state on any occasion and at any time.The way she looked at me was obviously unbelievable.

I sat down in my seat, took out my Walkman, plugged in my earphones, and listened to music.I'm listening to Mindy Ke's "Love Me" album.I really like her singing next to my ear: "Your fingers, your eyes, your Adam's apple, your mouth..." This lyrics is matched with her elegant and soft voice, there is nothing better.I still have a romance novel to read for entertainment, the author's method is very bad, but it is very funny.Anyway, I have to find something to do now, otherwise I will keep guessing why Qin Yu didn't come and why Qin Yu didn't come like I did in the broadcasting room just now.As I watched the novel, I couldn't control myself and laughed out loud, but they all stared at me like King Kong gods.

I was tragically kicked out of the classroom by their partners, who said I "disturbed the morale of the army". After waiting for Qin Yu to fail, nothing went well today.First, I was coaxed to the aisle by them as mentioned above, and then when I was standing by the railing of the aisle reading that clumsy romance novel, the book somehow fell into a puddle of stagnant water downstairs, and then when school was over I found that the bicycle had been moved to another place, and it took me a long time to find it. At this moment, I couldn't find the Oxford double-interpretation dictionary I used to-look, I only have this useless "New Concept English" in my hand. ", when I read it in the second grade of junior high school, I should have known how a person's day can suddenly become messy.I guess I shouldn't be angry or anything because I'm not the only one who has a "day to remember" and it happens all over the world.

Let me look in my dictionary again.My dictionary is quite old, the first edition was in 1984, and the words "internal communication" were still printed on the back.I don't know where it came from, but as soon as I find it in the house it's mine.I really like dictionaries—especially the larger dictionaries—they have hard hardcover covers, and each page is very thin and thin dictionary paper, smooth and resilient, with all the words They are all in small size, and the pages are overwhelming. There is absolutely no prevarication, exaggeration, or flashy. A dictionary is the most solid and substantial kind of book.I like to sit in the library the most, and spread out one big dictionary book after another luxuriously, so that I can occupy a piece of my territory-in fact, I often don’t really need so many dictionaries to do my work. For reference, it’s just that I hope to use dictionaries to build a high wall and temporarily isolate me from the outside world—being in a dictionary is like being in an atmosphere.I often carry my dictionary to and fro on campus; my dictionary is really used, not a decoration, but it is undeniable that with the dictionary by my side, I seem to have a blessing, walking, I can speak more confidently and calmly.I prefer the old dictionaries, such as my 1984 Oxford Double Solution. It has a dark green cover, with the word "Oxford" in gold stamping. Each letter has a calming force. The thicker and more refined cover of kraft paper is elegant, simple, bookish, and not ostentatious at all, unlike the newly released dictionaries whose covers are full of red, green and green geometric figures, lacking the atmosphere of a long history.

Alas, I used to think that the person I like must be like a dictionary, rich, thick, elegant and bookish. From him, I feel blessed, I feel that I can jump higher, see farther, and do more. More confidence in everything.I have this idea, it is definitely not a matter of a day or two, before meeting Qin Yu, I have always stubbornly adhered to this precious ideal.But that was before meeting Qin Yu.It has been nearly two years since I met Qin Yu, and I spent the two years with him in a daze, almost forgetting this ideal. It is my own pleasure to forget it.However, now it is Qin Yu who reminds me to remember it again.Who am I to blame?

My sister turned over on the bed and said something in a daze, which sounded like a person's name.Hee, isn't that her boyfriend's name?She is really a member of the most fashionable and beautiful tribe in the city when she washes up every morning before going out, but she has the most smelly habits in private. You see, she jumps on the sofa to pick her hair after eating dinner. I really feel sorry for the large and exquisite Arabian-style nightgown she wears, and sleep talking, drooling, and poor sleeping appearance. My sister, my roommate, understands she. My sister has been compared to me since I was a child.She is five years older than me, and always gives me clothes that I can't fit.What I remember most clearly is that during the three years she was in high school, she became more and more beautiful every day, making me look thinner and shriveled when I was eleven or twelve years old; during this period of time, the five-year difference between girls was the difference between adults and children, and I Only by looking at her can I be called a youth, and at that time, although I was younger than her, I was like a yellow-faced woman.At that time, there were more gatherings of her friends. Now that I think about it, maybe for the convenience of explaining to my parents, she often took me to parties and outings.The self at that time was really ridiculous. I was so absorbed in my studies, my head was still curled up here and there after I cut a piece of noodles in clear soup, my whole face was almost buried in my hair, and I didn’t understand anything psychologically. In the Shanghai dialect, you come and go, and you come and go, and you are a "muzhimujue"; after another year or two, my sister went to college, and I gradually thought about her little secret-true Yes, I still remember that among my sister's friends, there was a very handsome boy who spoke to people with a high-spirited look, with an unapproachable expression, but he had a different attitude towards my sister... I figured this out, She thought she had something to do with her sister, so she complacently went to interrogate her, but she laughed it off and said, "These tricks of children are only thought of by you as an endless aftertaste." My sister is such a casual person.Go to elementary school and middle school casually, take a college entrance examination casually, study a few homeworks casually, find a job casually, and fall in love a few times casually.The older she gets, the more casual she gets.However, with her casual behavior, her achievements are often astonishing-she always gets first-class results in the exams she randomly chooses; , located in those office buildings in Xujiahui; the boyfriends she made casually were all dismissed casually by her, and when she asked her what was wrong with them, she said casually: There is nothing wrong with them, it's just that it's been a long time and I feel bored.There is only one thing, I am really worried that she is too casual now, when she gets older, she will panic and have to marry someone casually, have a child casually, and get divorced casually after two years—then Not so good.But if this is a bad idea, it's better not to think about it. I am different from my sister.I envy her casual style of coming and going, but I can't do it.Because she is big, she is good, she compared me when I was a child, I had to stand out on my own, let my parents know me, know that I am also smart, and I am also excellent.I have been on the field, trying to fight, and fighting is my state of existence.I am able to have such grades and be able to go directly to the Department of Journalism of F University. This is not just for me.I should be happy--I am.However, when I found that my sister got what I had worked so hard for, it was as simple as picking up a coin on the side of the road, and I found that I was still inferior to her. Well, anyway, I was very successful.I really should be happy.What I fought for, I got. Oh no.Qin Yu, Qin Yu is an exception - he came, I didn't make any deliberate fight, now he is walking away, I want to reach out to grab him, I tried, but it didn't work, fighting didn't work for him.If it doesn't work, I have to fight, otherwise, what should I do?I don't necessarily have to sit in a chair and watch him go, do I? My sister turned over again and faced me. I saw her reach out and rub her eyes. Then, she looked at me with her eyes closed, and said mushyly: "Aren't you sleeping yet? What are you thinking about?" "I wonder why you slept so dead." "Me? I have nothing on my mind." She said slyly, "If you have nothing on your mind, you can sleep." "I just have something to do. I have passed the college entrance examination, so what else can I worry about?" She laughed and said, "Do you think I was born this big? What's on my mind about college? In society and history, the most important role is people - hasn't your teacher taught you that people are the most important thing!" Sister, this person, talking about society and history while sleepy, is really ridiculous.However, she kept saying what she said, so I just ignored her. Seeing that I didn't speak, she smiled again: "You children's tricks, I can go compile a dictionary." "You go and make it up, it can only be used as straw paper. Old sister, how long have you not touched a book?" It's true, I haven't seen my sister read since she started working last year. "Me? I read every month." She argued with a smile on her face. Alas, this is really playing the piano against the cow.Her color-filled fashion magazines were hardly books.To be honest, relying on those magazines, she has never been out of date from literature to music, but that is just material for talking about mountains, and the real stuff is absolutely nothing. She probably knew what I was going to say, so she beat me and said, "There are some things you don't understand. You, next time you have to study hard with me. You are going to college too. What do you think you understand?" said Finished, turned over and fell asleep again. What do I understand?I just don't get it, how could that pompous boy in her high school be a "trick"?Why is Qin Yu a "trick" again?How to use color pictures?What can I learn from her? I didn't learn anything from her.I was alone when I was young, and I wasn’t sure what was ahead, but I had to move forward, and some things had to be experienced by myself, even if I got hurt or had to shed a lot of tears, it’s always the safest to entrust myself to myself .What can others teach me?I don't know, and I don't want to know, because what others say is in vain, and you have to taste the warmth of a glass of water to understand.When I reason with others, I am also irresponsible.But I have to be responsible for myself.I am such a stubborn person, my parents always scold me for this, but I am already like this, people should always do what they want. The math teacher emphasized one more important thing in front of the blackboard.When she emphasizes the main points, she often uses chalk to circle, draw, and point the key points on the blackboard. She probably exerts all her strength in her hands, and the chalk is cut and broken until it is too short to be broken. So far—it’s always like this, making the so-called main point so that no one can see clearly, only circles and bars, her vicious look seems to be an enemy of the previous life with chalk, and an enemy of this generation with the main point. Fortunately, I don't have to listen to her anymore.Alas, one thing, you can't find it boring until you don't have to do it.In the past, I was really interested in mathematics. They all said that if I couldn't solve a problem, it was worse than dying my own mother.Now that I'm done, I'm afraid I won't need to touch mathematics from now on, so I suddenly find that mathematics is boring, tasteless, and meaningless.I just want to laugh when I see x, y, z because I think the days of them haunting me are gone forever.I am not prejudiced against mathematics, in fact, all homework is like this.I added liberal arts, but physics and biochemistry have long been lost. In addition to mathematics, there are also Chinese, English, and politics.The language is not bad, but the language of the current exam is mechanical, cumbersome, and you have to write such a technical composition, the fun of the writing is completely gone; English, it’s better, it’s finally usable, the optional questions I am It's boring to do; as for politics, do I need to talk about it? Why do I still have to come to school?Nothing else, mainly because the head teacher asked me to come.Besides, what are you asking me to do at home every day?Do you eat, drink, and grow fat?When I come to school, I am relatively free. Whenever I have something to do, I can leave when I ask for a vacation. When I go to school, I am also free, reading romance novels and listening to songs. Life is boring and comfortable.There are also a few people at the same level who were admitted early like me, and they live this kind of life every day. Compared with the "hard-fated people" with black eyes and red noses whose biological clocks are completely disrupted, we are so happy that we have nothing to say.Another reason for me to come to school is that I want to accompany Qin Yu.He was in a bad mood after being punished, which is understandable, I think, he needs my help most at such a time. He's been giving me this message for a long time: he needs my help; lately it's been a little stronger.I still remember very clearly that the day I saw him for the first time, he looked so helpless, standing helplessly in front of me. It was the first day of the second year of high school. I went to the concierge at noon to get the money order from the newspaper office, and happened to meet the old man at the concierge distributing letters.I saw a letter fall on the ground and picked it up.The envelope of this letter is very delicate - snow-white paper, with a printed stripe on the left edge, the stripe is outlined with hot stamping, and the back of the envelope is embossed with a printed trademark, giving it an embossed feel.I secretly praised it in my heart, and paid attention to who I sent the letter to with such a beautiful envelope—it was a freshman named Qin Yu in the first year of high school.I have always preferred the Qin surname, but I never thought that the two surnames "Qin" and "Yu" could form such a musical name when put together.Seeing that the class in the first year of high school was downstairs from our class, I put the letter in the dictionary I carried with me, intending to send it to him on the way. Standing at the door of that class, I looked in.Is that person named Qin Yu here?If so, which one?I called: "Which one is Qin Yu?" Which one is Qin Yu?Qin Yu!This is the first time for me to pronounce his name. For some reason, I suddenly thought of the poem "Sunrise in the east and rain in the west"-Qin Yu, it sounds like "Sunny Rain", what a delicate name! I called out many times before a boy stood up and walked towards me in the back row of the classroom.I'm not sure if he's the person on the envelope, but I really like the name Qin Yu, and I keep pronouncing it.That's how I saw Qin Yu.He stood in front of me with a polite and aggrieved expression, and kept silent as if angry. I asked him many times before he admitted that he was Qin Yu.I don't like his unhappy expression!So, from the very beginning, I had the feeling that he needed help, and that was me. The deskmate shook my hand and kept reminding: "It's your turn, it's your turn!" What's it to me?How come to me?I was just thinking about Qin Yu.Didn't the teacher stop calling me all the time?I looked up at Mathematics Teacher Zhang, and she was also looking at me.Eyes wide open, she seemed to think of something in an instant, and she didn't know if she was talking to herself or saying to us: "Oh, forgot. Not you."