Chapter 6 The dancers are all buried at the foot of the mountain

It was an autumn morning, and when she opened the curtains, she seemed to see mountains.Light brown, flat top, not too many weeds, like a man's broad forehead.She remembered that they used to run on the top of the mountain when they were young, and their gentle footsteps seemed to be gently smoothing the wrinkles on the forehead of a vicissitudes of life.The days are so soothing, they are like elves who can move mountains and valleys, fold a white cloud to make wings, and they can fly.She seemed to see the boy standing in the morning breeze again, holding a bouquet of slightly yellowed calla lilies in his hand, his eyes were slightly squinted because of the strong sunlight, and his expression was a little tired.She asked him, did you come to bless me too?He shook his head.And then she saw him insert the flower upside down into the soil, the dangling stalk and stained white petals reminded her of that suicidal bird they'd seen, plunged headlong into the soil, never looking back The gesture made them bring it up as a martyr over and over again.

She sat up anxiously.Is it a dream?But she clearly felt that he was coming.He was still wearing the same pair of old deerskin boots, the half length was not too short, and could touch the calves. He was too thin, or because the shoes belonged to his father, in short, his legs were wrapped in dense coarse trousers Tucked into the boot shaft, it is still a little wobbly.He was still wearing his brown hunting jacket, double-breasted, and around his neck was a crimson jacquard square scarf with a little fringe.He bowed his head deeply, burying his chin in the kerchief.When he raised his head slowly, the gaze in his deep eyes was like a bat that flew out suddenly, and caught her in his mouth.Then he held out a hand to her, as a courtesy, as an invitation.This should be how many times she has longed for it.But she took a few steps back, shook her head in horror, and said to him: Why are you still here?please go.I am getting married.

marry?He asked blankly, as if talking about something that had nothing to do with them. Yes, I am getting married. No, how can you get married, you are going to follow me. It's impossible, again and again.It's not six years ago and everything will never be the same again. As she was talking, she suddenly heard someone knocking on the door.She ran to open the door, and turned her head to him with some difficulty and said: Goodbye, next time.She walked to the door, calming herself a little—she knew that Ciji hadn't left, she was surrounded by his smell, the smell of the dirt on his wet boots and the sap from the calla lily stem on his fingers.The smell of peach bubble gum he's chewing, the smell of his dad's cologne he's smothered on his handkerchief.

Oh, again, she murmured in a low voice, but she had already opened the door. Outside the door is Lanny.Lanny was holding the huge paper bags in both hands, panting violently, she got in as soon as the door opened, and threw the two big paper bags on the sofa. "Oh, Xiao Xi, did you just wake up? Haven't you dressed yet? We have to leave at ten o'clock, hurry up, it's too late!" Lan Ni walked in front of her and looked at her.Then she called out again: "Oh, Xiao Xi, didn't you go to bed early yesterday? Your dark circles are so serious! My God, I can't even cover them!"

When Lan Ni said this, she seemed to have made a big mistake, and she smiled embarrassedly. Suddenly, she felt her soft lips sticking to her earlobe, and whispered softly: "I don't think so. In my opinion, the dark circles under your eyes are just one of the most charming parts of you." She heard the voice of the second time, her face was a little hot, - the second time has never said such a thing, so moving words.She was about to fall heavily into it, but she panicked in her heart, and turned her head quickly to see that behind her were the window sill filled with dazzling sunlight and the pink ornamental cactus placed on the window sill.That's all.She took a breath, turned around and ran to the bathroom, and closed the door:

"Ciji, let's go. Don't make trouble again." She begged to the mirror.She didn't dare to look at him, because she didn't see him for too long, like a person who has been away from the sun for a long time, and the sun hurts his eyes suddenly.But she couldn't help but look at him.She could see him now, like a dream.He was standing right behind her, half a head taller than her, and the body folded behind her was like a piece of wet paper, draped softly on her back.So close, she smelled him again, which gave her the illusion that the six years she had left each time was nothing more than a long winter, and she had been waiting in the cave quietly until this familiar The smell came back again like a bouncing spring.

But she couldn't allow herself to think so.She turned on the water, leaned over and began to wash her face.She tried to drown out his voice with the sound of water, but he was still saying: "I said that if you marry someone else, I will definitely come to the wedding to make trouble, remember?" He spoke in a very relaxed tone, but these icy words were like little snowflakes in the cold winter, slipping into the air one after another. It disappeared from her body.How could she forget these words, these are the only love words left by him, like her bible, she has been reviewing them over and over again, day and night.She didn't look up, but buried her face in the warm water in her palm:

"It doesn't count, every time, you broke the oath first, if you are still alive, I will definitely not break it." "It makes no difference, honey, I'll pick you up, come with me." "Oh, no, next time, please, this time is not right anymore. I have already promised others. Everything has been entrusted." After she finished speaking, she hurriedly wiped off the water on her face with a towel.She grabbed the flask of lotion by the sink again and poured it into her palm.He suddenly poked his head over from behind her, leaned down and smelled the white yogurt-like cosmetics in her palm, and said with a little disappointment:

"The last thing you used to like is this goo, you like to keep your face fresh all the time." "Every time, I was only eighteen years old at that time." When he said this, she became a little sad, mechanically spread the lotion on her face, and then opened a small pink box next to the lotion, she Start to paint light makeup on yourself.She didn't turn off the water, and subconsciously hoped that the sound of water would drown out her conversation with Ciji, although in fact, she knew that no one could hear their conversation. "Every time," she finally couldn't help asking, "Where have you been all these years. Are you in heaven?"

"I'm on my way, on my way to confess and cleanse myself. I'm on my way back to pick you up." "Is it cold and lonely?" She was drawing her eyebrows, but her hands were already trembling. "Well, there are some. But it's not as terrible as they said. It's just that my clothes are always wet, and because there is no sunlight, I can't dry them anyway." When she heard him say this, her heart ached.In fact, she had always played a very maternal role in their love, probably because she was a year older than him.When she recalled the past, she often imagined him as a rabbit, a cat, so she could hold him in her arms and pet him over and over again.It took her six years to forget the feeling of stroking his hair and neck, and she finally got used to keeping her hands firmly in her jeans pockets when she misses him so much, not letting them hang out to look for him, to look for that Gentle touch.

"I'm sorry," she said, "I should have stayed with you." She felt so sorry that she even wanted to turn around and hug him.She doesn't know if the soul can be hugged, and she doesn't know if the soul needs warmth.Her heart has already softened, what a helpless thing this is.However, the corner of her eyes suddenly glanced at her wrist, as if she had been hit hard, she suddenly shook her body to separate herself from him: "Xi, I tried to go with you six years ago. After that, I promised them that I would live a good life." It was a day not long after his death when she sat on the balcony and slit her wrist with a daffodil knife.It didn't hurt. When she closed her eyes, she even thought that the warm feeling on her wrist was that he was holding her hand.He never held her hand, even though they had been with each other throughout childhood and adolescence.He just likes to walk in front of her alone, like a bouncing shepherd boy leading his little sheep across the vast grassland.She remembered that they traveled like this when they were fourteen, to the countryside.He still walked in front of her, not turning back, and not accommodating her pace.Then she tripped over a tangled root and fell to the ground.Hearing the sound, he turned around and looked around, then stopped and waited for her in place.He saw her stand up, and he started walking again.She was so distressed at his indifference that she sobbed softly.He asked her what was wrong, and she said aggrievedly: Why can't you take my hand and walk away?You never held my hand.After thinking about it again and again, he never seriously thought about this question, and he really didn't bother to think about whether he was going to take her hand.So he thought about it, and then he said very seriously: I don't think it's necessary, because I know you're always with me and with me.She asked, what if I were separated from you one day?After thinking about it again and again, I shook my head and said: You won't.She said, what if I marry someone else?After thinking about it again and again, I said: I still think you will marry someone else instead of following me, but if you have to, I will make a big fuss about your wedding.Her eyes brightened immediately, she raised her head, indulged in those beautiful illusions, and asked: Really?Will you go to my rescue, yell stop at the moment of salute, and take my hand and rush out of the auditorium?She almost thinks of the wedding as an adventure, and time and time again appears as a Zorro-like hero at the right time.Nodding again and again, yes. That was the only time, every time he told her that he would hold her hand and take her away.She has been meticulously collecting her dowry, keeping these two sentences in her heart. Since she was 14 years old, her puberty has just begun.This was such a long and gentle dream and wish, but it stopped when she was just an adult. It is the turn of spring and summer when the times die, and they like to sit under the vines in the yard and eat strawberries in that season.Every time I always love to read aloud with a book of poems.He was so engrossed in watching it that he didn't even notice that the strawberry juice got on his clothes.she Like those quiet afternoons, they sat in front of a white plastic table, deeply attracted by the poetry collection every time, without raising their heads, they just slowly stretched out their slender white fingers to reach the strawberries on the table, and brought them to their mouths .She likes to look at him like this from the side.She thinks that time is the best poet, although time has not done anything specifically.Every time I look at Elliott, I like it so much that he screams when he looks at it: "Oh, listen to this passage: 'Yes, I myself saw Sybyl of Gumi hanging in a cage. When the children asked her, What do you want, Sybyl, she replied, I want to die. 'Ah, what a great sentence." She listened to him quietly, then nodded with a slight smile.She doesn't know much about poetry, and those sentences are decisive and paranoid, but she feels that as long as he likes it, it must be good.But every time, shortly after reciting Eliot's, he killed himself.He used a long scarf, white and limp, and if it hadn't been for his death, the scarf would have seemed such an innocent thing.He died suddenly and silently, and he didn't even give any notice to her, the person who had been living by his side for more than ten years.It was a Tuesday and he didn't come to school.She called his house in the afternoon, only the servants were there, and said they had all gone to the hospital, and accidents happened again and again.She rushed to the hospital, and by the time she arrived he was not breathing.The nurse was pushing his stretcher down the hospital corridor.The sunlight came in from the window at the end of the corridor, chasing and shining on the white sheet covering him, as if if he missed this moment, he would never be able to shine on him again.It took her a lot of effort to walk over, stretched out her hand, and opened the sheet. He was lying there, looking very small.He looked like a golden baby in the June noon sun.She can still smell his unique fragrance, and there is no rotten smell at all, which is great.she thinks. "Xiao Xi, are you alright? It's going to be too late!" Lan Ni yelled outside, and started knocking on the bathroom door.She then took another deep look in the mirror, and like a lamp, she extinguished his face.Then opened the door. Laney handed her the white lace tulle gown.She was about to go in and change when there was another knock on the door.Lanny went to open the door for her, and she stood there in a daze.It's Roger.She watched him approach her.Roger always smiled when he looked at her, as if he didn't care about the day, the weather, or his mood. As long as he was facing her, Roger always had such a tolerant smile.But in her opinion, this kind of intemperate laughter is somewhat deceitful to children.That's right, he treated her like a child, held her in his arms, and took good care of her like a rare flower.It was a kindness worth reciprocating, so she finally decided to marry him. He walked towards her, but this short distance of less than ten meters was so long.She heard voices coming in again and again: "Is that him? Are you going to marry him?" "Yes." she replied. "Impossible, he is not at all the same as the man you want. Oh, are you crazy? Come with me. How can you marry him?" The voice was very loud, almost loud screaming, which made her extremely uneasy, but in front of her was Roger's face approaching her, Roger's face was still calm and smiling. "But he is, and he's going to be my husband," she said firmly. "You won't like him, what a rough man he looks, like a big hollow stake, he won't understand your heart, he won't appreciate your specialness, he won't know what's so good about you ..." "No, he loves me, he loves me so much." "Well, even so, do you love him? Oh dear, ask yourself, do you really love him?" His voice was about to break her. "I still decided to come and see you," before she recovered, Roger had already walked in front of her, took her hand with a smile, and put it between his, "I know that according to the ceremony, I should I'm waiting for you in the auditorium, but I always want to see you earlier, so I finally couldn't bear to come and see you first. ——Ah, your complexion is not very good, what's wrong with you?" "Well, no, maybe I was a little excited and nervous last night, so I couldn't fall asleep." She said hastily. "Well, it seems to me that you needn't be nervous at all. It's all set," he said.Looking at his face, she suddenly felt how innocent he was.She withdrew her hand, clutched the gown, and said to Roger: "I'm going in to change into a dress." "Yes, put it on and let me see it. I really want to see it." She said to the man. Seeps into every muscle and every nerve of the face.However, she felt that once she turned her head, she immediately forgot his face. She carried the dress into her bedroom.As soon as she closed the door, she said again and again: "It's a very funny wedding, get over it and follow me." "No." She shook her head. "He looks like a big, clumsy bear. He must have no rhythm or literature, and he will never give you what you want." "But again and again, those are no longer important to me. After you leave, those are no longer important to me. I can stop reading books or listening to music, as if I am completely cut off from the previous world." She said bitterly. She fell into a kind of utter silence after his death.It was as if someone came up without anyone noticing and covered her ears and eyes. From then on, in a completely blind world, she asked herself, what would she do? If he left, what would she do next? do what.She went to his house.She went into his room.She even flipped through his diary.She wondered why he suddenly decided to die.It's a mystery to all.Because there was no sign before, not even a trace of unusualness.He suffered no blows and encountered insurmountable difficulties.Instead, he won his school's photography award for several outlandish photography.Although he didn't care about the silver-plated watch as a prize, his photo was washed out and hung in the corridor of their grade.He still squinted as he passed, she noticed.But otherwise there was nothing unusual about life. But the seventeen-year-old suddenly killed himself with a scarf.After looking carefully at his room, she was sure that he found the scarf from under the box. It belonged to him when he was about fifteen years old. She remembered that he hadn't worn it for two winters.But he turned it out from under the box and entrusted it with a heavy responsibility. She had gone through the whole room many times, but she still didn't know what touched him and made him suddenly decide to die.However, to her great disappointment, there was no mention of her in his diary.It can be said that his diary is very boring, just recording the books he read, the movies he watched every day, or the animals and plants he saw on his way to school.He is particularly interested in the description of the appearance of animals and plants.Usually half a page can be written for an ordinary ant hole.On a day dated to the end of May, Eliot's was transcribed in the diary for the second time.He didn't finish copying.She suddenly remembered that he read aloud to her that day, and when he came to school early the next morning, he looked very tired.In this regard, he told her that I didn't even have the strength to continue copying.He died a few days later. In fact, she was only faintly disappointed after reading the diary again and again, but she was not very surprised.Because Ciji is such a weird person, he likes talking to himself rather than chatting with others, and he likes shutting himself up in a room rather than traveling.He was often quite indifferent to matters of general concern, but he showed a perfect interest in trifles that were of little value.He has never had any friends except her.Even his parents, though very saddened by his death, were not overly surprised.Since he was a child, they took him to see a psychiatrist many times, first because he still didn't speak when he was 4 years old, but in fact he didn't have this ability, but he just didn't have this interest.That is to say, in his opinion, dialogue communication is no fun at all, so he would rather keep silent.The adults used many methods, forcing him to seduce him, and he finally spoke, his voice was very small and tired.Later they took him to the doctor again because he didn't want to go out.He didn't even want to step out of his room.He had no interest in what it was like outside.After he learned how to read, he fell in love with reading, so he liked to lock himself up and read all kinds of strange books.The doctor took a long time again—in fact, it was not so much that the doctor's treatment worked as that he finally couldn't bear the doctor to disturb him every day, and he finally walked out of the house.The last time he went to see a doctor before he died was because he used scissors to cut his nails but always cut his fingers. At first everyone thought it was because of his carelessness, but then gradually found that every time he picked up the scissors to cut his nails with all his heart Every now and then, I would cut off my fingers and watch the blood gushing out but I didn't seem to feel it. "Don't you feel any pain?" the doctor asked him with a very headache.In the end, the doctor determined that he was a person with underdeveloped nerves and very slow reflexes, which made him not panic about the endless bleeding, on the contrary, he had an attitude of appreciation. It is not difficult to explain why he chose to commit suicide. "Suicide is not a very embarrassing thing for him," the doctor analyzed, "because he doesn't feel any special pain." In the short life time and time again, maybe she was the only one who cherished him like this, and it was she who missed him like this after his death.She appreciates and tolerates his eccentricity, and she pays unceasing care to him like a rare little dinosaur. Although he seldom gives her anything in return, she can still feel that she is the most precious. people close to him.And in her subconscious mind, Ciji is a person who does great things.She always felt that such a weird person like Cici, who was arranged by God to come to the world, must have an extraordinary mission.He was going to be a great artist, she was sure of that.She remembered that the autobiographies of those lonely and weird artists she had read had their same temperament every time, and this temperament passed her by like a spring flowing down from the deepest mountain stream.She believes that God has given her mission to protect and watch over the spring well.So during this growth, she has been doing things for him. She helps him with school homework, helps him choose the clothes and shoes and socks he wears every day, prepares stationery and school bags for him, and even decides his meals for him. Food to eat.Because times are not interested in these things, she feels that these are the burdens of becoming a great artist for times.So she obliged to take over all these jobs.She allowed him enough time to sleep, walk, read and think.This is the most important thing for an artist. This is how she grew up step by step with Ciji, so she was very used to being a monster in the eyes of others. She defended him and had full confidence in his talent as always. However, the fact is that Cici did nothing, except often recited some paranoid poems aloud or said a few strange and elusive words out of nowhere.She finds these valuable.She is proud to be a great artist's assistant.But the last time gave her a heavy blow.He killed himself, he fled first before he was an artist.Of course she can't bear such pain, because the time is not only her whole love, but even her whole career.She has been managing her relationship with Ciji like building a tall building and taking care of her. Now she's a pauper sitting in the middle of the crumbling ruins. When she figured this out one summer afternoon, she cut her own wrist with a daffodil-root knife, imagining that she could understand every thought, every moment of death The feeling of walking, it's a consistency of pace, she thought, and I don't hurt, every time it doesn't hurt, I don't hurt.She told herself so. The blood on her wrist was like a flaming alcohol lamp, but she felt that he had grabbed him.She thought that he was finally willing to grab her hand and take her away. This kind of walking might be a permanent death, but she didn't care. She wanted to leave and die, so she just followed him. Now that she had put on her gown, she stood before Roger again. "It's so beautiful, my bride!" Roger exclaimed.She felt a little tired, after such a long time, she was still not used to the compliments from the man in front of her, she had been with Ciji for so many years, she had hardly received any compliment from Ciji, but that was her habit and Willingly.Now in her ridiculous gown like a doll tied in tulle, after this day she will forever lose her freedom, her divine right to be the assistant of the great artist. She sighed softly.She could feel that time was standing behind her, stepping on her white gauze dragging on the floor, which was her cumbersome tail, and he was trying to help her get rid of it.But she was no longer flustered, and no longer worried that Roger and the others would notice her abnormality. Roger took her hand and hugged her.She wondered if he had noticed that he was as stiff as a cold roasted corn.Fortunately, he was in a hurry to go to the auditorium to see if everything was ready, so he left immediately. She seized Lanny's hand at once, and said in a trembling pleading voice: "Lanny, I'm a little scared. I don't know if I'll ever get married." "What nonsense are you talking about?" Lanny was puzzled. "Oh, Lanny, you don't know, he's here." She tried to lower her voice, although she knew that she would definitely hear it again and again. "Who?" "each time." Lan Ni froze for a moment, then looked at her solemnly, giving her all the attention in an instant, as if she was looking at a terminally ill patient.She said slowly: "Xiao Xi, after so many years, I thought you were completely healed. But at the critical moment, you still couldn't get rid of his entanglement with you..." At this time, she no longer had the calmness and composure she had just now, and she didn't even have the basic standing posture. She hugged her shoulders with both hands, as if feeling the severe cold, and then said while trembling: "It's not entanglement, he just came to take me away. He's not wrong either, we used to agree..." "Xiao Xi!" Lan Ni shouted loudly, interrupting her very roughly, "You have to get all thoughts about him out of your mind, and you can't be entangled by these dirty things anymore! You have to remember , you left the nursing home a long time ago, you are a normal girl now, and today you are getting married!" She nodded vigorously, and just about to speak, she heard it said in her ear again and again: "Don't talk to her anymore, she won't understand us. No one will understand us. Baby, let's go on the road?" The voice of the second time is so soft, sticking to her like sticking sugar on the eardrum. After listening to the words again and again, she stopped arguing with Lanny.She became silent and looked out of the window.The sun is shining and it is a fine day. The room was quiet for a while.She and Lanny stood in the middle of the room, and Lanny stared at her face and grabbed her hand, as if afraid that she would be taken away suddenly.After a long time, Lanny said slowly and softly: "Good Xiao Xi, Cici is dead. He was a weirdo, he didn't belong to this world, so he left and went to a place that suits him. But you, Xiao Xi, now you love your man so much, you can't Thinking about those messy things, all you have to do is sink your heart and put your hands in Roger's hands, he will give you a happy and safe life, understand?" She raised her head to look at Lanny's face, her eyes were actually blurred, as if she was behind a glass window full of water and breath, and she couldn't see anything clearly.She couldn't see Lanny's face at all, the world was like a thick fog maker, constantly brewing big clouds of fog from afar, and she was already surrounded.But she didn't dare to say it, and she felt that there was no need to say it again, because she seemed to feel that the times had completely untied the silk yarns wrapped around her: "You don't have any restraints on you anymore, you can run with confidence, you see, is this good?" Facing Lanny's face, she nodded slightly. The horn outside the door has already sounded, and the car to pick them up is coming.Lan Ni carried her into the car, she walked a little recklessly, Lan Ni called out several times: "Be careful of the skirt dragging behind you!" She was a little flustered when she sat down in the car, looking around bewilderedly.Then she immediately heard the voice again and again: "My dear, don't be afraid, I'm here, I'm in the car." She immediately became at ease, and whispered: "I've never been in a car with you, but you know what—" "What?" asked again. "I've always fantasized that when you become an outstanding artist in the future, we will buy a spacious car, um—it should be one and a half times as spacious as this one, and you can take me far away with it." she said intoxicated. "Hehe," Cici laughed, "Honey, just follow me on foot, we have been holding hands and running to the horizon, isn't it good?" "Well, it's also good. It's fine to follow you." She said. Makeup artists apply heavy make-up to her backstage in the auditorium.The make-up artist said while applying rouge to her: "Your face is very red and hot now, do you feel it?" At this moment, what she felt was that the time was holding her face with both hands, looking at her eyebrows, she was caught by the eyes of the time It was very warm. "You seem to have two pupils in your eyes." The makeup artist was surprised and murmured. Many people surrounded her, helping her with this and that.She just sat there with a smile on her face.Said again and again: "Wait a little longer, it's time soon, and we're about to hit the road." "Where to go?" "High and far." "Is it a distant mountain?" She asked, she thought, no wonder why Cici was wearing a hunting jacket and her feet were still muddy. "almost." "What is there on the mountain?" She asked with infinite longing, a little bit reluctant.She has never acted like a spoiled child every time, and this feeling of spoiledness is so beautiful, she seems to have become a fairy who has ascended to the clouds. "What do you want?" Asked twice. "Well, a dance floor surrounded by calla lilies and daffodils. We can dance in the middle. Well, there's also a lace bed where we can sleep when we're tired from dancing." "Yes, there are, calla lilies, daffodils, dance floors and beds." When the music in the auditorium started, she was a little bit at a loss.She knew she was being led ahead, in the eyes of many, many people.But she couldn't see anything, there was only a thick fog in front of her eyes.Then she exclaimed: "each time!" "I'm here, darling. We'll be on our way in a minute," she heard him say, and nodded in relief.She could no longer see what she was facing, Roger's face.Roger was wearing a black suit with small flowers in his breast pocket, and he was smiling more happily than ever.Lanny was helping her to walk towards Roger.She asked: "Xi, are we on a boat? I feel like we're crossing a river." "Yes, we will reach the other side soon." "Yeah." She smiled so brightly that all the guests at the wedding were bathed in such joy. Roger took out the ring to put on her.Laney thrust a ring into the palm of her hand too.They want to exchange, heralding the entrustment of life.But she just felt that she was holding a rope in her hand, and she was looking around for the other side.Because she couldn't see it, she called out anxiously: "each time?" "Well, baby, listen, now you throw out this fiber rope, we will go ashore, and then we can run all the way to the foot of the mountain." Ciji ordered. "OK, all right." Everyone at the wedding saw that the beautiful bride suddenly threw the ring up high with a smile on her face, stretched a hand behind her back and pulled the veil off her head, and then she ran towards the door of the auditorium go.Like a fawn, she was so gay that she never stopped, leaving only the stunned bridegroom and staring guests behind. She saw the main road, leading to the foot of the mountain.She will dance with her lover on the mountain and sleep on the same pillow. "Time." She called his name.One of her hands tightly grasped that of the times.They are like a big net starting towards happiness. It happened to be ten o'clock at noon when she rushed out of the auditorium door.As she stood in the bright sun and she ran towards their hillside, and the speeding truck passed her, she heard the time say: "Close your eyes, can you smell the scent of the earth on the hillside?" She was very obedient, she closed her eyes. The sun was so strong that day that the truck driver dozed off as if seeing a ghost when he passed by, and the large bundle of calla lilies in the trunk rolled up sickly with yellow edges, like a piece of paper. Zhang covered his face and cried bitterly.