Chapter 23 twenty one.Twilight in the church

In the evening, Duan Xiaomu returned to the small room behind the church with crutches.She will pass by the solemn church, the gate is like a giant with broad shoulders, tolerantly welcoming everyone.There are always white doves on the roof of the slope of the church. They look at all the people who come here to pray seriously. They may not understand the faith, and they are wondering why these people gather together so piously.At six o'clock, the bell embedded in the top of the church will ring.The pigeons who had just been touched by faith were startled, and they flew away in a "flutter".When Duan Xiaomu looked up at the sky, he always felt that maybe tomorrow they would become believers.This girl is always full of hope in the world for nothing.The hope that turned out always continued her fragile life again and again.

At night Duan Xiaomu had two dreams alternately. The first dream was like this: She was standing at the door of the church with the door open and the wind blowing.She leaned against the door, looking at Xiao Jie who was kneeling in the middle of the church.That's right, it was Xiaojiezi, and with a sad and repentant expression that he had never shown, he silently admitted the mistakes he made in the past.She was standing by the door, and she ran over quickly after he finished the ceremony, and put on the cross that was still attached to her collarbone just now.They knelt and hugged each other. The dark church was still unlit in the dark, but they hugged each other and could clearly see each other's eyes.This is a spring dream that Duan Xiaomu can't get rid of on many winter mornings.Sitting on the edge of the bed in a daze, she heard the church bell ringing in the morning, piercing her bright balloon-like dream.She was very cold, and she knew very well that Xiaojiezi had never been here.

The second dream was related to the swing deep in the kindergarten.She was brought into the kindergarten by some mist, and she saw Du Wanwan sitting on the swing and swinging slowly.When Du Wanwan saw Duan Xiaomu coming, she jumped off the swing and ran towards Duan Xiaomu.Duan Xiaomu hooked Du Wanwan's little finger that was as soft as plasticine, and led her to run and run. In her dream, she was a girl with nimble legs and feet that walked like flying.They ran towards a distant hillside.She said there was a large cherry grove there, and she wanted to take Du Wanwan to see it.They finally came to the front of the cherry grove before dark.There is a piece of vitality that has nothing to do with the seasons, and it is bright day and night like a fairyland.They held each other's hands, thinking, what kind of happiness will be waiting for them in front of them?After Duan Xiaomu woke up, she immediately felt that the dream disappeared into the distance like a kite with a broken string. In fact, Du Wanwan had never returned to Licheng, and Duan Xiaomu had never seen such a cherry grove.

But no matter what, Duan Xiaomu is willing to believe that these two dreams carry good omens.She felt that one day, the sun would illuminate her little house, and that evening, not only the pigeons but also all other creatures learned the faith and heard the gospel, and they gathered here together.And she will rush to the gate to meet Xiaojiezi and Du Wanwan who are coming. However, the real situation is that every day she coughed continuously in the cold room, and her chest was solidified into a hard mass like dried lime.And it was getting dry, and she felt like her chest was going to burst.These days, she is very eager to hear Du Wanwan's distant voice in her ears, she misses her so much.But her ears were also numb and hard like lime, and no sound was clear anymore, even the loud church bell.Of course, these made her more and more aware that she was constantly being haunted by terrible illnesses. Although there was always hope, she still felt that her body was getting lighter and lighter, and she would be uprooted like a slender grass. farther and farther away from this world.

Duan Xiaomu returned to Xigendao Street on a snowy evening.There were messy footprints on the thick snow, and it was even more ridiculous when she looked back at her own footprints. One footprint was accompanied by two small circular marks.This is her unique footprint. When she was waiting for Xiao Jiezi at the intersection where Xiao Jiezi used to wait for her, she thought, even if she couldn't meet Xiao Jiezi, she hoped that he could see her leaving behind when he walked here. The footprints left by him, knowing that she had come here to wait for him.It was dark again, and the snow began to fall again.She stood at the base of the wall shaded by a tree, motionless, the snow had repainted her eyebrows, hair, and the original indigo clothes all over her body.Now she is a little white person, a little white person with no complaints or regrets.

She waited for him when the street lights were on.No, it should be said, not him, but them.Beside him was a girl in a long orange tweed skirt.Her hair is the khaki color of a Japanese girl in the latest fashion pictorial, and the purple eye shadow on her eyes dances like sleepless fireflies in the night. She seems to be a clockwork doll with spotlights all over her body, and her shapely steps keep pushing her body. Shine forward, and forward.Of course she was a healthy girl with sound hands and feet, and she and Xiao Jiezi were trotting forward at the moment, and their footsteps sounded very harmonious.Xiaojiezi's face was illuminated by the firefly girl, and he was looking at the girl beside him with a tenderness that Duan Xiaomu had never seen in more than ten years.After they had all run away, the little white man who was covered with snow came out from behind the tree, and she softly called to Xiaojiezi's back as he went away:

"Little Jiezi." She called his name so softly that she didn't intend for anyone to hear her.Circles of white gas flew out of her mouth along with his name. This is my love, she thought. The black footprints are very clear in the dim street light and against the white snow.Looking from a distance, Duan Xiaomu saw that her footprints had been completely covered by theirs who just ran past.No one could know that she had been here and waited for him that night.Her white love has also been swallowed by the air, who has seen it? After Duan Xiaomu's right arm recovered, she did not immediately devote herself to her beloved embroidery work.During this period of time, she was a little confused. She was always asking herself, what is the use of earning a lot of money? ——Of course, she needs to earn some money. She can’t always accept other people’s charity in the church. Of course Duan Xiaomu knows this, but her monthly expenses are not too much. She only needs to do a simple job Can earn enough.She had given up on everything about her surgery.She didn't want to hurt Du Wanwan again just to save her own life.So she doesn't have to think about the money for the surgery now.Originally, she worked hard to make money and wished to let Granny Li live a good life, but now Granny Li has been taken care of by God, and she can't help her anymore.I only wish to reunite with her in heaven sooner.In fact, in Duan Xiaomu's subconscious mind, there was another purpose for her continuous processing of skirts in those days - she knew that Xiao Jiezi needed money, very much, and at any time.She understands very well that only when she is rich can Xiaojiezi come to her, and she can see Xiaojiezi.This made her have a good impression of money for a long time in the past. She felt that money could enable her to meet her loved ones, and money could bring happiness to her loved ones.And how much she cared about his happiness.

But now, Xiao Jiezi doesn't know that she lives in the church, maybe he doesn't need her money anymore.She doesn't like money that much anymore.This was the most decadent time in Duan Xiaomu's life. She went to self-study classes as usual, attended classes or was in a daze. After class, she would be delayed for more than an hour on the way home. It was actually a very short distance, but she liked to take a detour to After walking around Xigendao Street, I walked along the short wall to the familiar intersection, and then came back the same way.She could see a lot of children playing, they looked just like she remembered when she was a child, boys were always naughty and full of bad things.Girls are always obedient and always like to stick to boys.One day, walking past a group of children playing, she suddenly heard someone call:

"Pin!" The voice did not come towards Duan Xiaomu, it should be a boy calling his companion. She immediately turned to face the lively group of children and asked loudly: "Who's 'Pin?'" Her voice was so mournful that it startled the children.A little boy with a bald head and rolled trouser legs puffed out his belly, and shouted at Duan Xiaomu: "Kidnap, don't meddle in your own business!" Duan Xiaomu pounded hard on the snow twice with his crutches before he could stand still.She begged: "You guys tell me who's 'Pin'? I just want to have a word with her."

The children didn't speak for a while, and suddenly a little girl took a step forward and answered Duan Xiaomu: "Sister, my name is 'Pin', what do you want from me?" Duan Xiaomu looked at the little girl again, she was wearing a baggy coat like a bag, her body was very thin, and her two small arms were limp The ground rests on both sides of her body. Although she is short, her neck is extremely long, and her head is also very big. She also has a fluffy child's hair, but the top of her head is pressed flat, which is indeed somewhat similar to the shape of a pin. Duan Xiaomu smiled at the girl.She felt very kind, this little girl must be very much like her childhood.she asked her:

"I like your name very much. Who named you that?" The children looked at each other.Of course they knew that "Pin" was a nickname with sarcasm, but why did it sound nice to the crippled girl in front of them?The little girl herself was also a little flattered. Of course, she didn't accept this nickname readily, and she secretly felt inferior to this nickname.But now that she was told that it was good to hear, she was really a little excited.Before she could answer Duan Xiaomu's question, a boy with a particularly long face and a pair of protruding ears answered first: "Brother Xiaojiezi took it for her." Duan Xiaomu trembled, she walked up to the little girl, and gently stroked her head with her hand: "Does Brother Xiaojiezi often play with you?" The little girl shook her head: "No, he is very busy, but he is very powerful, he is our leader. He taught us many things, such as climbing walls, stealing..." "Shut up! Don't talk so much with strangers." The bald-headed little boy quickly stopped "Pin" from finishing his sentence. Duan Xiaomu knew that Xiao Jiezi was teaching these children to do bad things, so he still acted like that.She shook her head and frowned, but she still couldn't hate her in her heart.She stopped talking to the children, just touched Pin's face, then turned and walked away on crutches.The children behind were still shouting: "Look at her walking, how fun it is!" Duan Xiaomu suddenly felt a little warmth on the way back to the church from Xigendao Street.She thought that Xiao Jiezi must have named the little girl "pin" to commemorate her.If he remembered this nickname, he should remember Duan Xiaomu. "Well, he always remembers me." When Duan Xiaomu thought of this, he smiled in the snow.