When I was woken up by Malatang's phone call, I was having a dream. In my dream, I was twenty-eight years old, and I was still a flower on the branch of cardamom. It was so tender that water would drip out when I twisted it. I stood by the playground and watched him play basketball. The basketball missed and flew to my feet.He came running towards me with big strides. White jersey, bronze complexion. The beads of sweat on the tip of my hair flew into the air drop by drop as I ran. Under the golden sunlight, each drop turned into colorful gemstones. I was so dazzled by the light that I couldn't breathe.He stretched out his hands to me, instead of picking up the basketball, he hugged me.His head slowly bent down, such a handsome face slowly enlarged in front of my eyes, my blood surged up, my heart beat faster, I was about to faint from suffocation, and my body was trembling with happiness..."I love you, love you Looking at you is like a mouse loving rice..."

I don't hear, I don't hear, it's like the deaf can't hear!I tried my best to hypnotize him mentally, but he obviously didn't cooperate and his figure disappeared. It's only 0.1cm, 0.1cm! I closed my eyes and exhausted my anger for a long time before I took out my phone angrily. Before I could "hello", Malatang had already preemptively said: "What are you doing? You haven't answered the phone for so long? I thought you fell into the toilet! Come out quickly and go shopping with me." Apart from my parents in this world, she is the only person who dares to yell at me like this without worrying about her life.

"I just woke up, wait for me to take a shower, see you at the old place in forty-five minutes." After hanging up the phone, he staggered into the bathroom and flushed under the shower head for a few minutes before he was fully awake.Thinking about the scene in the dream, I couldn't help but raised my neck and let out a long wail. "what!" For so many years, I have often had spring dreams, but my wolfish desire has never succeeded, it is always either this accident or that accident.At the beginning, I fainted every time when he just hugged me, and then I woke up from the dream. Later, I stopped fainting. When he was about to kiss me, I subconsciously closed my eyes, but the eyes just Close it, and the dream will wake up.

Next time, I must take the initiative to "offer my lips" when he just hugged me.I can't dominate real life, can't I even dominate my own dreams?I still don't believe in this evil! While wiping the shower gel, he shook his head and sang to the shower head. Singing in the bathroom, it is easy to highlight the singing voice, and it will always make people's self-confidence extremely inflated. I often think about how a talent like mine hasn't been discovered yet?If I accidentally participated in "Super Girl", the name of corn and jelly would have to be changed to steamed buns.

My name is Su Man. If I have a fan, it would be appropriate to call me Mantou. I just finished wiping the shower gel on my body, "I love you, I love you, just like a mouse loves rice" rang again. Malatang!You are so inhuman!I ignored it and continued to take a shower, the bell stopped for a while, then rang again, and when the bell rang for the fifth time, in my head, there was already a symphony orchestra playing, "I hate you, I hate you, just like mice hate big cat".After taking a quick shower, I wrapped my hands in a towel and ran outside.On the tiled floor, the slipper slipped and I almost fell. If I really fell, I was afraid that I would have to report to the hospital. I was so anxious that when I picked up the phone, the first sentence was: "You are in a hurry to reincarnate! Wash yourself!" You can't even take a bath, go to your mother."

Malatang has a strong temper, loves to swear, and opens and closes his mouth "fuck!" At first, I was not used to it, so I suggested to her tactfully that you are also considered a literary youth, and your speech should be elegant and written.Malatang blinked his eyes and said cheerfully, "Okay!" I was just moved by the fact that I was able to turn the prodigal son back, when she dumped me again: "You, his mother, are so hypocritical!" I reacted for a while, and I could only imitate Master Xing's tone and say "it's really written"! Since then, I have completely surrendered to Malatang.Those who are close to Zhu are red, and those who are close to ink are black. After a long time, in line with the principle of reciprocity, I will swear at her, even if it is a special way of emotional communication between me and Malatang!

"What did you say? What did you say? Say it again, come back and say it in front of me and your dad..." A rich mezzo-soprano completely frightened me into a stupor for three seconds, and I didn't react until three seconds later. I quickly moved the phone far away, but my ears were already numb.After the lion's roar on the phone roared for a full three minutes, I rubbed Famu's ears and carefully said good things.But my mother didn't eat my sugar-coated cannonballs at all, so I could only continue to listen to the teachings. I thought that this scolding would definitely last until the phone ran out of power, so I gently put the phone on the table and just sneaked to get dressed. I didn't want my mother to stop suddenly, I was shocked, wouldn't it be so fairy?

"I was so busy scolding you that I forgot the business." I felt a chill all of a sudden, mom's business? "Manman! Your Aunt Chen has a good friend's son who just came back from abroad. He is handsome, talented, and has a successful career..." I muttered in a low voice: "Does such an awesome person still need a blind date?" Mom asked loudly, "What did you say?" I immediately said: "Nothing, you continue." "I heard from your Aunt Chen that because he has been concentrating on his career, he has never had a girlfriend. He is not too young now. The other party's parents are very worried. After finally waiting for him to return to China, he immediately asked someone to introduce his son to someone. You Chen Auntie made an appointment for you to meet at a cafe near the South Gate of Tsinghua University."

My mother became more and more humble, and her tone became more and more gentle, but I felt that her voice was like silk from the sky, wrapping me in a chill. "Mom, there are not one hundred blind dates, but ninety-nine! Last time, I met a rascal who called home every night..." "Where have you been reading for so many years? You are young, and you can't bear a little bit of setbacks. When you encounter failure, you can't think of running away, but climb over it! Wherever you fell, get up from there. !" Well!My mother has put all her energy into doing publicity work in state-owned enterprises.

Soft, hard, neither soft nor hard, carrots and sticks are used alternately. In the end, my mother expressed in a trembling voice that if I don’t go on a blind date today, I will be the most unfilial daughter in all ages. It was me who was angry. My little shoulders should be able to bear the infamy of being an unfilial daughter, but thinking of the delicious dishes cooked by my mother, I had to surrender.My mother sent me Aunt Chen's mobile phone number by text message, and I hung up the phone, but called me again and told me to dress up properly. With a gentle voice and a ferocious expression on my face, I said: "Mom, don't worry, I will definitely 'dress up' myself."

Thirty minutes later, I took a taxi and headed for the south gate of Tsinghua University.When the driver saw me for the first time, his face turned pale. I am very satisfied with my appearance. Just humming a little tune and getting into the taxi, Mala Tang's call immediately came after me, and I moved the phone away a certain distance with the foresight.The string of loud curses made the hand of the driver next to him tremble a few times.Originally, I planned to wait until she got tired of cursing before explaining, but in order to save my own life, I cut off Malatang's cursing: "My mother forced me to go on a blind date. If I don't go, she will cut off my mother and daughter from me." relation." Malatang fell silent. As an older leftover woman, she was persecuted by her mother no less than me more times than me. However, she has a more intense personality and rarely surrenders, so the mother and daughter have a lot of trouble , only 0.1cm away from turning against each other. After a while, she said lazily, "Then you go! I'll go shopping by myself." "No! I'll just sit down for a while, um..." I glanced at the watch on the car, "Go wash your hair, or make a facial mask. I'll see you in fifty minutes." Malatang laughed knowingly: "You are very different today, aren't you?" "Very gothic, very fantasy, very Hitchcock." The way I am now, even if my mother stands in front of me, she won't recognize who I am. "Okay, I'll do my nails first, see you at the beauty salon. If you want to let me go, I'll take your head off!" "Yes Yes Yes!" My blind date touched Malatang's resentment towards her miserable world. After finishing the business, she still refused to hang up the phone: "You said that my mother, from middle school to university, to my work, has always taught me to put my studies first. Heavy, don't think about it, study hard, and make progress every day! Talk to the little boy more, she can interrogate for an hour, the skirt should not be too short, the clothes should not be too see-through, no small suspenders are allowed, no navel-baring clothes are allowed, I wish I could "Men don't get close" engraved on my face, why did she suddenly change her style once I turned twenty-five years old, instead of asking me how my work was, she just asked me if I knew any boys who had opportunities for development. People pursued me, and I answered no too much, and she said that I was too hippie in clothes, and I was not girly. Fuck! She thought it was so easy to attract bees and butterflies? She didn't teach me or allow me in the first 25 years Learn, how could I? In ancient times, a prostitute had to be trained by a bustard for a few years before taking up a job..." The driver's hand started to jump again. For my safety, I could only whine and hang up the phone. Fifteen minutes later, Aunt Chen and I met in the cafe. Aunt Chen saw me, her complexion changed very much like Monet's oil painting, the colors were colorful and blurred.I sat down very calmly. Before I ordered coffee, I put the ashtray on my right hand side. The cigarettes and lighter in my handbag were all ready. As soon as that seaweed classmate came out, my performance began. Five minutes later, thirty seconds before the appointed time, Haicao still hadn't arrived. I looked at my watch and thought, he doesn't seem to be active either!If he is late, I can leave with confidence.Just thinking about it, Aunt Chen said excitedly: "It's here, it's here!" I reached into my bag to feel for a cigarette, and at the same time followed Aunt Chen's eyes and looked out of the glass window.For an instant, as if being hit by a witch's magic wand, all my movements stopped.The world inside the window has become a black and white stop-motion silent film, but outside the glass window, the sun is shining brightly and cherry blossoms are flying. His figure is still slender and straight, and his eyebrows are as handsome as in my dream. He is slowly walking through the sunshine and seven years of time, walking towards me, the cherry blossoms are flying behind him, and my heart is falling. There was lightning and thunder in my head, but my facial expression was numb, like a marionette, being poked and moved by Aunt Chen. How he introduced himself, how I shook hands with him, how he sat across from me, how I sent Aunt Chen away, I don't know at all, all I know is this person I have been secretly in love with for eleven years, this person I chase The person who watched him go to high school and college, this person who I thought had disappeared from my life forever, this person who I would never think about during the day but dreamed of countless times at night, unexpectedly appeared before my eyes again . I spent ten minutes doubting the authenticity of this matter, seriously doubting that it was still my erotic dream, and finally pinched my thigh hard to confirm that I was indeed not dreaming. It took me another ten minutes to digest the reality of this matter, and I kept yelling "stop", "stop", "stop" to the roar in my head! When my head finally stopped roaring, I spent another ten minutes in ecstasy, but I didn't dare to show it. I could only put my hands on my hips in my heart, looked up to the sky and laughed, hahaha, he also came on a blind date!Single, single! Come on I'm a pineapple, dill dill dill dill, come on I'm a piece of mango, guoguoguo... I haven't finished dancing the fruit hula, and I see my reflection on the coffee spoon ...Ah~ Shocking!moving!Terrible!Human world! I was so filled with unbelievable resentment that I wished I could strangle myself on the spot. I stared at the little me in the little coffee spoon in a daze.He was speechless and choked with tears. "I love you like a mouse loves rice." The phone in my bag started to ring, I pressed it off without saying a word, and continued to stir the coffee, the phone rang again, I pressed it off again immediately, the phone rang again, I pressed it off again, groping furtively for the shutdown button, he said: "If you are in a hurry, you can leave early, and I will talk to Aunt Chen." "I don't!" My tone was too eager, my posture was too eager, which made him startled for a moment. I wanted to explain, but my tongue seemed to be tied up, and I couldn't say anything.Could it be telling him that although you don't have the slightest impression of me, I have been secretly in love with you for eleven years, so when I see you, I get nervous, I can't speak, and my limbs don't listen to my head. "I love you, I love you, just like a mouse loves rice." This drool song is compared with the low piano sound in the coffee shop, coupled with my outfit, so that all the eyes that glance at me are like a calculus Topics are generally unpredictable. He still had a gentle expression on his face, looking at me indifferently. Under his gaze, I couldn't find any reason to press the phone again, so I could only slowly turn the phone out of the handbag. The momentary change of mood made me understand the death row prisoner who was going to the execution ground. "Please, God, let Malatang's temperament suddenly change drastically!" I answered the phone while praying silently in my heart.The moment the phone was connected, a string of clear and bright curses wafted out, and I could almost see the specific staff notes dancing hula gleefully on our coffee table, and each expression was exactly the same as that of Satan. He is a well-cultivated person. After so many years, he has cultivated a bit of a bearing that has experienced the world. In order to take care of my feelings, his expression has always been calm. He is holding a coffee cup and looking out the window, as if he is admiring the scenery. . A well-dressed man and a colorful garbage dump-like woman are reflected in the glass window. All the guests can't help but look at us, and the waiter has been watching us curiously.Suddenly, disheartened, I jumped up in bewilderment and said, "Sorry, I have to go on a date with a friend." He stood up politely and said politely and strangely, "Goodbye." I escaped from the cafe amid the scolding of Malatang, and the moment I opened the taxi door, I yelled at her: "If you don't shut up, I'll take out your intestines and wrap them around your neck. Circle, strangle you!" At that moment, the driver, the master, must have thought of refusing to board, but I had already sat in the car, and angrily took out a hundred-yuan bill, "Go..." I was stunned, and shouted at the phone, "Where are you going?" As soon as she moved her mobile phone in the direction of the driver, Malatang immediately obediently reported the address of her beauty salon.The taxi flew out with a "swish", and Malatang asked cautiously, "What's the matter? Have you met a bum again? Don't get angry, let's go back and deal with him slowly, so that he will never dare to show his face in the capital again." I said with a playful smile: "No! I met a handsome guy, he has a straight body." "Have you moved your heart?" "Yeah! My saliva is drooling three thousand feet." "You want to throw someone down? Has he done it?" "I think about it, but people look down on me, and I would rather die than follow!" Malatang laughed loudly: "When you go to a nightclub at night, you can choose from fat, thin, thin, and I will pay for it." "I want Feng Shaofeng's face, Wu Yanzu's figure, Zhong Hanliang's eyes, Jia Nailiang's gentleness..." The two of us were laughing like grandma wolf on the mobile phone, and the driver's car was bouncing around, but I didn't bother to worry about my own life anymore. I smiled heartlessly, who am I?The new generation of Bone Essence has long been tempered by this cruel society into a resounding copper pea that cannot be steamed, cooked, smashed, or chewed.However, why do I think about his strange and alienated tone over and over again in my heart?Why is my laugh so loud and my heart so empty? Since we met, he hasn't said much, but I just sat there by myself, playing Six Chapters of a Floating Life with a silent appearance and a wild heart.The meeting this time is so much like my relationship for so many years. I have traveled thousands of mountains and rivers, and my face is full of dust, but he still stands smiling under the magnolia tree, spotless. After a day of shopping with Malatang, I went to eat Malatang and drank some wine.After drinking and eating, the two waved goodbye. As soon as I entered the house and turned on the computer, I saw Malatang's QQ avatar jumping. "Are you home yet?" My acquaintance with Malatang is very interesting. When we were young and beautiful girls, we met on the Internet. After chatting for a long time, we talked more and more about everything.Her real name is very literary, called Xu Lianshuang, but her online name is very tough - "I want to be a shrew", I was in the period of inferiority and self-pity, and when I saw such a tough online name, I immediately added her .She speaks very sharply, and often hits the nail on the head, making people feel hot and spicy. I called her Mala Tang, and she also agreed to this title by default.After chatting for more than a year, on a night that was not too dark and windy for a month, we agreed to meet at a place.The beautiful woman in the red windbreaker shivered with me in the cold wind for more than ten minutes. I didn't dare to make any assumptions or associations between her and Malatang. Later, it was she who saw me keep calling the phone, Hesitantly came over to me and asked me if it was "the most beautiful time", and explained to me that she was Malatang, and that she just lost her phone on the bus, so we met in victory. I drank a few sips of fruit juice, calmed down, and then typed on the keyboard slowly. "Well, just walked in." "what's going on?" I knew that my laughter couldn't cover up Mala Tang's laser eyes, and I stared at the screen in a daze, not knowing where to start. "What happened during the blind date?" She forced her to ask. "What is the probability that a person will meet the person he had a crush on on a blind date?" "Secret love? First love? Only love?" "All count!" Malatang sent me a surprised expression: "Ever? Not ever?" I was stung by her words, my heart convulsed, and my hands curled up. She sent me a hug emoji and a cup of steaming tea. My emotion lasted only 0.1 second, and the true color of the vicious queen was exposed again. "There are two possibilities for him to go on a blind date. One is that he wants to find a girlfriend, and the other is that he is forced by his parents just like you. No matter what the reason is, it proves that he is single now. The man is not married, and the woman is not married. Put away your sister Lin's begonia weeping blood sample. His mother's! If my old lady can have such a good thing, I will die from laughing, are you still melancholy? I want to strangle you!" After finishing speaking, she sent a message A picture of me being swung up and flattened wildly, with blood splattered, and finally, hanging me on a tree and hanging me to death. I responded with a violent image of me riding a horse and picking her on knife point. "The other party may be an iceberg." "You are burning with desire, even the coldest iceberg can melt!" "I might have to wade through the flames." "You are burning with lust, why are you afraid of a sea of ​​fire?" "I have spent many years forgetting him. Once the ashes are revived, I am afraid that I will..." There was no response on the screen, so I took out my phone and called my mother: "Mom, it's me." Just as I was obliquely instructing my mother to get his contact information from Aunt Chen, a string of bright red bold characters jumped onto the dialog box: "Didn't you already have an idea? Still pretending to be tender with my mother? You're going to die!" !" Although I am a little fox, my mother is an old fox who has become a spirit. I am still covering up here, still holding a pipa to half-hide my face!Mom has completely and thoroughly comprehended my central idea.After so many blind dates, the first time I showed interest, my mother laughed happily: "Okay! Manman, your dad and I will support you with all our strength. You can rest assured and go forward, we will definitely win!" Where and where?I didn't want to occupy the bunker, so I didn't dare to talk nonsense with my mother, so I quickly hung up the phone.