Chapter 25 Chapter 24 This Love Can Be Reminisced

The wind is very cold, so cold that the heart is completely chilled. The withered and yellow leaves on the tree are falling in pieces with the wind. Just like that, Xiao Shishilang stood under the tree without making a sound, expression or movement. After an unknown amount of time, Feng Siniang finally let out a long sigh, and said with a wry smile: "I hurt you...why am I always doing wrong things and saying wrong things?" Xiao Shishilang didn't seem to hear what she was saying at all, but after a long time, he suddenly said: "This is none of your business at all."

Feng Siniang said: "But..." Xiao Shishilang interrupted her and said: "People who should go will always have to go sooner or later, so maybe it's better." Feng Siniang pondered, and said: "You mean, short-term pain is worse than long-term pain?" Xiao Shishilang said, "Yes." Feng Siniang said: "Of course, this is also a sentence. The person who said this must be very smart, but human emotions are not so simple." She smiled sadly, and continued slowly: "Some problems cannot be solved so easily." Xiao Shishilang closed his eyes, bowed his head and said, "So what if we don't solve it?"

Feng Siniang was silent for a long time, and said sadly: "Maybe you are right, if you don't solve it, you have to solve it, because this is something that no one can do anything about." Xiao Shishilang also remained silent for a long time, then suddenly raised his head and said, "Since it's been resolved, why should we bring it up again?" He took Feng Siniang's hand, said with a smile: "Come on, today I will make an exception and ask you to invite me for a drink, let's go drink." He laughed, and Feng Siniang also laughed. But in the smiles of the two of them, there is an indescribable pain and an indescribable loneliness...

"This feeling can be regarded as a memory, but it was already at a loss." Shen Bijun has read these two lines of poems a long time ago, but he has never been able to understand them.It was only now that she could understand that the loneliness and sorrow contained in it were too thick to melt away. No matter who encounters such a thing, there is nothing but heartbreak. Shen Bijun's tears have flowed down, and his heart is calling: "Xiao Shishilang, Xiao Shishilang, I didn't mean to do this, and I don't want to do this to you, but you are still young, and you still have a future. I can't drag you down any longer."

"Of course you will be very sad now, even very angry, but as time goes on, you will gradually forget about me." Forget, forget, forget... is it so easy to forget?so easy? Shen Bijun's heart was throbbing, she knew that she would never forget him. In the bottom of her heart, why doesn't she hope that he will never forget her—if she knows that he has really forgotten her, she would rather die, would rather chop herself into pieces, chop into mud, and burn to ashes . There are forests beside the road. Shen Bijun suddenly ran into the dry forest, threw himself under the tree, and burst into tears.

All she wanted was to cry and pass out, cry to death. Because she can no longer bear the pain of this heartbreak. She thought it was right to do so, and thought she could bear it, but she didn't expect the pain to be so intense and deep. After an unknown amount of time, she suddenly felt a gentle but firm hand caressing her hair. "Xiao Shishilang? Could it be that Xiao Shishilang is back?" If Xiao Shishilang really came, she decided to throw herself into his arms and never separate, even if she wanted her to abandon everything and escape to the ends of the earth, she would be willing.

She turned around. Her heart sank. The light in the woods was very dim, and the dim moonlight shone through the forest gap, illuminating a person's face, a handsome, delicate and gentle face. The person who came was Lian Chengbi. He is also much haggard, only those eyes are still as gentle and kind as before. He silently stared at Shen Bijun, with so much affection expressed in silence. Shen Bijun's throat was blocked, and so was his heart. After a long time, Lian Chengbi finally said: "Everyone at home is waiting, let's go back!" His voice was still so calm, as if he had forgotten everything, and it was as if these things never happened at all.

But how could Shen Bijun forget?Everything, every period of joy and pain, has been engraved into her bone marrow, engraved on her heart. All this she will never forget until she dies. "The spring silkworms don't run out of silk until they die, and the wax torch turns to ashes before it dries up." Shen Bijun's eyes suddenly became far away, and his heart also returned to the distance. She remembered that a long time ago, on the same autumn evening, they wandered into a dry forest, looking at the setting sun leaking from the dead branches, and lamenting the shortness of life. It's time to go back.

At that time, Lian Chengbi said to her: "Everyone in the family is waiting, let's go back!" The same sentence, almost even the tone of speech is exactly the same. That day, she followed him back immediately. But now, everything has changed, and her person has also changed. The time that has passed can never be restored by anyone. Shen Bijun sighed for a long time, and said quietly: "Go back? Where are you going back?" Lian Chengbi's smile was still so gentle, and she said softly, "Going home, of course I'm going home." Shen Bijun said sadly: "Home? I still have a home?"

Lian Chengbi said: "You have always had a family." Shen Bijun said: "But it's different now." Lian Chengbi said: "There is no difference, because the matter is already in the past, as long as you go back, nothing will change." Shen Bijun was silent for a long time, with a bleak smile on the corner of his mouth, he said slowly: "I understand now." Lian Chengbi said: "What do you understand?" Shen Bijun said lightly: "You don't want me, you just want me to go back." Lian Chengbi said: "How can you say..." Shen Bijun interrupted him, and said: "Because the reputation of the Lian family is supreme, it must not be tarnished by anything, and the daughter-in-law of the Lian family must not do anything to ruin the family style."

Lian Chengbi stopped talking. Shen Bijun said slowly: "So, I must go back, as long as I go back, I can forgive anything, but..." Her voice suddenly became agitated, and she continued: "Have you thought about it for me? I am also a human being, and I am not a decoration for your family." Lian Chengbi's expression was also very sad, and he sighed: "Do you...do you think I did something wrong?" Shen Bijun's head drooped, tears were already streaming down, and he said sadly: "You didn't do anything wrong, it was me who did it, I'm sorry for you." Lian Chengbi said softly: "Everyone will do wrong things, I have completely forgotten those things." Shen Bijun slowly shook his head and said, "You can forget, but I can't." Lian Chengbi said: "Why?" Shen Bijun remained silent for a long time again, as if he had suddenly made a big decision, and said word by word: "Because my heart has changed!" Lian Chengbi also seemed to have been whipped suddenly, and he couldn't even stand still. Shen Bijun bit his lip, and continued slowly: "I know telling the truth can sometimes hurt people, but no matter what, it's better than lying." Lian Chengbi held his hand tightly and said, "You...you...do you really love him?" Shen Bijun's lips were bleeding from the bite, and he nodded slowly. Lian Chengbi suddenly held her shoulder with his hand, and said sharply: "Tell me, what am I not as good as him?" His voice was also hoarse, and even his body was trembling with excitement. He has always thought that he can keep calm no matter what he encounters, because he knows that only "calm" is the way to solve things. Only now did he realize that he was wrong. After all, he is also a human being, a living person, and his blood is hot after all. Shen Bijun's shoulders seemed to have been crushed, but he reluctantly endured it, not letting any more tears flow. She gritted her teeth and said, "He may not be as good as you, not as good as you in everything, but he can sacrifice everything for me, even die for me, you...can you?" Lian Chengbi froze, slowly let go of his hands, and slowly stepped back. Shen Bijun's gaze was also avoiding him, and he said: "You also said before that if a woman's heart changes, it cannot be undone no matter what. If someone wants to undo it, the pain must be even greater." Lian Chengbi's bright eyes also became empty, staring blankly at her, and murmured: "Okay, you're fine..." He said this sentence over and over again, and he suddenly rushed over and slapped her hard on the face. Shen Bijun didn't move, as if he was completely numb, as if he had turned into a stone man, he just stared at him coldly, and said coldly: "You can hit me, even kill me, I won't Blame you, but you will never be able to make me change my mind..." Lian Chengbi turned around suddenly and ran out. Only then did Shen Bijun's eyes begin to look at him. Watching him go away and disappear, her tears flowed down again. "I'm sorry for you, sorry for you, but I have to do this because I have to. I'm definitely not such a cruel woman as you imagined." "I did this because I didn't want to hurt you." "I can only repay you with death, to repay you..." The earth only wished that it could tear its own heart, and people would also be torn, torn in half. she can't. Apart from death, she has no other solution, no choice! Night has come. Shen Bijun's tears seemed to have run out. She stood up suddenly, straightened her clothes, and walked forward. There is only one road for her, and this road leads directly to the "Doll Villa"! She seems to have seen that vicious smiling face, and she is smiling and saying to her: "I knew you would come back, because you have no other way to go!" Wine, not fast. Xiao Shishilang's heart seemed to be blocked by something, and he couldn't even flow the wine. Why is Feng Siniang not worried?Her thoughts may be more difficult to express than his. Moreover, this is a small stall, and the wine sold is sour, bitter, and spicy. Feng Siniang couldn't drink it at all. She is not stingy, but how can the bride carry money?In this small town, there was no place where she could pawn her jewels. Xiao Shishilang will always be on the verge of "empty money". Feng Siniang laughed suddenly, and said: "The two of us seem to have only to drink at the stall forever." Xiao Shishilang said blankly: "The stall is also very good." Although his people are here, his heart still stays far away. When he and Shen Bijun were together, although they would always live in disasters or misfortunes, they also had happy and sweet moments. It's just that now all the joy and sweetness have turned into pain, and thinking of these things, he only suffers deeper. Feng Siniang quickly poured down a glass of wine, and said with a bitter face: "Some people say that no matter how bad the wine is, as long as you drink it quickly, you won't feel it after drinking it, but this wine seems to be an exception. .” Xiao Shishilang said lightly: "In my opinion, only wine that can make people intoxicated is good wine." He just wanted to get drunk quickly, but his mind was sober. Because "pain" can keep people awake, even if you are drunk, the pain in your heart still cannot be relieved. Feng Siniang stared at him, she had used many methods to divert his mind, think about other things, and stop thinking about Shen Bijun. Now she knew it was impossible. No matter what she said, there was only one person in his mind. Feng Siniang finally sighed, and said: "I think, she must have her own reasons for treating you like this, and there must be other reasons. I don't think she looks like such a cruel woman." Xiao Shishilang said slowly: "There are no truly cruel women in the world, only women who change their hearts." The voice was so far away, as if it didn't come from his mouth at all. Feng Siniang said: "I don't think she is that kind of woman, but..." Xiao Shishilang suddenly interrupted her, and said, "Do you know who has the highest martial arts among the people who are still alive?" Feng Siniang naturally didn't know why he suddenly asked this question, she pondered for a while before replying: "As far as I know, it's Xiaoyaohou." Xiao Shishilang said: "I know you recognize him." Feng Siniang said: "Yes." Xiao Shishilang said: "What kind of person is he?" Feng Siniang said: "I haven't seen him before." Xiao Shishilang was also stunned, and said: "Not only do you recognize him, as far as I know, he even gave you two very good swords." Feng Siniang said: "But I haven't seen anyone from him." Xiao Shishilang smiled wryly, "You've confused me again." Feng Siniang also smiled, and said: "Every time I go to see him, I talk to him through the curtain; once, I couldn't help rushing into the curtain to see his true face." Xiao Shishilang said, "Didn't you see it?" Feng Siniang sighed, and said: "I think I've moved fast enough, I know that once I rush into the curtain, he's gone." Xiao Shishilang said coldly: "It turns out that he is not your friend, and he doesn't want to see you at all." Feng Siniang smiled, and seemed very proud, said: "Because he is my friend, that's why he doesn't want to see me." Xiao Shishilang said, "What's this talking about?" Feng Siniang said: "Because there are only two kinds of people in this world who can see his true face." Xiao Shishilang said, "Which two kinds?" Feng Siniang said: "One is the person he wants to kill... the person he wants to kill will definitely not live long." Xiao Shishilang was silent for a while, and said, "Is there another kind?" Feng Siniang said: "There is another kind of woman - the woman he likes. As long as the woman he likes, none of them can escape his grasp. Sooner or later, he will always get his hands." Xiao Shishilang's complexion changed, he poured a glass of wine down his throat, and said with a sneer, "So, he didn't like you." Feng Siniang's face also changed, she seemed to be on the verge of getting angry, but she immediately smiled and said: "Even if he doesn't like me, anyway, no matter what you say today, I won't be angry." She didn't let Xiao Shishilang speak, and then said: "There are many legends about him in the Jianghu. Some people say that he is blind, numb and ugly, so he dare not see people, and some people say that he looks like the King of Chu. It's very similar, a big man with a big waist and a beard." Xiao Shishilang said: "No one has ever said that he is good-looking?" Feng Siniang said with a smile: "If he is really good-looking, why wouldn't he dare to meet people?" Xiao Shishilang said leisurely: "Maybe it's because he was born very short, for fear that others would look down on him." Feng Siniang's eyes widened, she stared at Xiao Shishilang and said, "Have you seen him?" Xiao Shishilang didn't answer this question, but asked instead: "Do you want to go outside the pass again?" Feng Siniang said: "Yes." Xiao Shishilang said: "Did you see him outside the pass this time?" Feng Siniang said: "No, I heard that he has entered the customs." Xiao Shishilang pondered, and said: "Is his martial arts really unfathomable?" Feng Siniang sighed, and said: "Don't talk about anything else, just talk about the lightness kung fu, no one can match it." Xiao Shishilang suddenly smiled and said, "Could it be that I am not even his opponent?" Feng Siniang stared at him, and said slowly: "It's hard to say!" Xiao Shishilang said: "What's hard to say?" Feng Siniang said: "Your martial arts may not be as good as his, but I always feel that you have strength that others will never learn, and never match." She smiled, and continued: "Maybe it's just because you will work hard, but if a person really dares to work hard, others will be in awe of you." Xiao Shishilang stared into the distance, and murmured: "You are wrong, I have never really worked hard before." Feng Siniang said sweetly: "I didn't ask you to really work hard, I just said you have this energy." Xiao Shishilang said with a smile: "You are wrong again, if the time really comes, I will really work hard." Although he was smiling, there was not even a hint of a smile in his eyes. Feng Siniang's complexion suddenly changed again, she stared at Xiao Shishilang's face, and asked: "Why do you suddenly ask me these things?" Xiao Shishilang said lightly: "Nothing." Although he looked calm on the surface, there was a murderous look in his brows. This did not escape Feng Siniang's eyes. She immediately asked again: "Do you want to find him desperately?" Feng Siniang seemed unwilling to leave his face, and said word by word: "That's because you want to die!" She quickly continued: "Maybe you think that only 'death' can solve your pain, don't you?" The muscles on Xiao Shishilang's face suddenly tightened. He finally couldn't control himself anymore, he stood up abruptly and said, "I've had enough wine, thank you." Feng Siniang immediately grabbed his hand and said loudly: "You must not leave!" Xiao Shishilang said coldly: "When I want to leave, no one will be able to keep me." Suddenly someone said: "But I must keep you." His voice was gentle and calm, but with an indescribable indifference. In the voice, a person slowly came out from the darkness, with a pale face, bright eyes, very serene steps, and a very gentle attitude, he looked like a scholar.It's just that there is a sword hanging by his waist, a long sword! The scabbard was pitch black, and shone with a chilling light under the dim light. Feng Siniang lost her voice: "Is it Young Master Lian?" Lian Chengbi said slowly: "That's right, it's the next person, maybe only the next person in this world can keep Xiao Shishilang." Xiao Shishilang's expression also changed, and he couldn't help but said, "You really want to keep me?" Lian Chengbi smiled lightly, and said: "That's just because I'm not in a good mood, and I really want to ask you to have a drink with me." His pupils seemed to have shrunk, he stared at Xiao Shishilang, and said slowly: "I have such a mood today, it is all thanks to your Excellency, even if you want to force your Excellency to stay for a glass of wine, you shouldn't refuse, right? ?” Xiao Shishilang was also staring at him for a long time, and finally sat down slowly. Feng Siniang breathed a sigh of relief, and said sweetly, "Young Master Lian, please sit down." The lights seemed to be dimmer. Lian Chengbi's face, under this light, looked like a dead person. His gaze has not left Xiao Shishilang's eyes until now.He seemed to want to see what was going on in Xiao Shishilang's mind from Xiao Shishilang's eyes. But Xiao Shishilang's eyes were empty, and he couldn't see anything. The wine seller had been watching them all the time—especially Feng Siniang, he had sold wine all his life, and this was the first time he had seen a female customer like Feng Siniang. He is not a gentleman, he only hopes that the three of them will get drunk as soon as possible, preferably unconscious, then at least he can touch Feng Siniang's hand secretly - it would be better to touch it elsewhere. but now…… He found that since this gentle young man came, the two of them seemed to have an indescribable uncomfortable feeling. He didn't know that this was murderous intent, he only knew that as soon as he walked over, his palms would sweat, and even his heartbeat seemed to stop. Feng Siniang was pouring the wine, and said with a smile: "This wine is really not good, I don't know if you can drink it." Lian Chengbi raised his glass and said lightly: "As long as it is wine that can make people drunk, it is good wine, please." This sentence is almost exactly the same as what Xiao Shishilang said just now. Shen Bijun never dreamed that Lian Chengbi would say the same thing as Xiao Shishilang, because they are two extremely different people. This is probably because they are basically the same.It's just that the acquired environment made them two completely different people. Or maybe it's because they're thinking of the same person and have the same feelings. Feng Siniang also had a lot of emotions in her heart, and suddenly thought of Yang Kaitai. She never felt that she was sorry for him, because she had never loved him. Since he wanted to be affectionate, no matter what kind of crime he suffered, he would do it on his own, and he could not blame others. But now, she suddenly understood his sorrow, and suddenly understood how painful it is for a person's love to be rejected and scorned. She suddenly felt a little sour and stuffy in her heart. She slowly raised her glass and drank it quickly. Lian Chengbi's wine glass was full again, and he raised his glass to Xiao Shishilang again, saying, "I'll toast you too, please." He also seemed to be desperately trying to get himself drunk, and seemed to have no choice but to experience pain that he could not forget, as if the only way to numb himself was with wine. What is he for? Feng Siniang couldn't help but asked tentatively: "Perhaps even Young Master doesn't know, she..." She didn't know what to say, Lian Chengbi interrupted her, and said flatly: "I know everything." Feng Siniang said: "You know? Know someone is looking for you?" Lian Chengbi smiled bitterly, and said, "She doesn't need to look for me, because I've been following her." Feng Siniang said: "Have you met her?" Lian Chengbi turned his eyes to the darkness in the distance, and said slowly: "I have seen it." Feng Siniang was obviously very surprised, and said: "Then what about her?" Lian Chengbi said sadly: "Let's go, let's go... Those who should go, will always have to go sooner or later..." This sentence is exactly the same as what Xiao Shishilang said. Feng Siniang was even more surprised: "Did she leave him too?" "She obviously wants to go back, why did she leave again?" "Since she is determined to leave him, why is she so unfeeling and cruel to Xiao Shishilang?" Feng Siniang is also a woman herself, but she still can't understand a woman's heart. Sometimes she doesn't even understand herself. But Xiao Shishilang seemed to have suddenly understood, and his whole body seemed to suddenly become cold - from his heart, his stomach, to the soles of his feet. But his eyes were burning like flames. He knew that she was more painful, more contradictory, and could no longer be avoided or resolved. She can only die. Death is a kind of relief. However, she will never die in vain, her death must have a price, because she is not an ordinary woman, and before she dies, she will wash away the humiliation and hatred with blood. Xiao Shishilang clenched his fists tightly, because he already understood her intentions, he only hated himself why he didn't think of it, why he didn't stop her. He can't wait to chase after her immediately, and exchange his life for hers. But not yet, he had to do it alone. He can no longer owe others. Lian Chengbi's eyes had turned back from afar, and he was staring at him, and said slowly: "I always thought you were a poor person, but now, I realize that you are much luckier than me." Xiao Shishilang said, "Lucky?" Lian Chengbi smiled again, and said, "Because I now know that I never got her completely." He smiled sourly, but with an indescribable sense of ridicule, and he didn't know if it was a mockery of life, others, or himself? Xiao Shishilang was silent for a while, and said word by word: "I only know that she has never done anything sorry to you." Lian Chengbi glared at him, suddenly looked up to the sky and laughed loudly, and said with a big smile: "What are you sorry for? What are you sorry for? There is no 'absolute' thing in this world, so why do people bother to pursue it?" Xiao Shishilang said sharply, "You don't believe me?" Lian Chengbi suddenly stopped laughing, condensed the wine in the glass, and murmured: "Now I don't believe in anything, the only thing I believe in is wine, because wine is much more reliable than anything else, at least it can make me drunk. " He drank a glass quickly and sang loudly: "Feng Siniang, Eleven Lang, you are about to drink, don't stop drinking. Today I have to drink three hundred cups. I hope I won't wake up after being drunk. All the sages will be lonely." , only the drinker leaves his name..." If you can't drink alcohol alone, if someone asks you to fight for it, you will immediately drink fast. Lian Chengbi fell down on the table, still holding the wine glass tightly in his hand, and murmured: "Drink, drink, don't you dare to drink?" Feng Siniang was also very drunk, and said loudly: "Okay, drink, no matter how much you drink today, I will accompany you." The more drunk she got, the more pitiful she felt for Lian Chengbi. The sudden depression of a calm and strong person is the most sympathetic.Because the more sudden the change, the more intense the feelings of others. It wasn't until this moment that Feng Siniang knew that Lian Chengbi was also a person with emotions. Xiao Shishilang also seemed to be drunk. When I was about to get drunk, it was also the time when I got drunk the fastest. Lian Chengbi murmured: "Xiao Shishilang, I should have killed you..." He stood up suddenly, drew his sword, and stared at Xiao Shishilang. But he couldn't even stand firmly, swung his sword hard, and fell down. Feng Siniang rushed over, trying to help him, but fell down herself, and said loudly: "He is my friend, you can't kill him." Lian Chengbi giggled and said, "I should have killed him, but he was already drunk, so he still can't, can't..." The two of you said one sentence, and I said one sentence, as if they were talking very vigorously, but except for themselves, no one could understand what they were saying. Then, suddenly, they stopped talking. After a while, Xiao Shishilang stood up slowly.Under the dim light, he bowed his head and stared at Lian Chengbi for a long time. He looked like a wounded beast, with sword wounds and pain all over his body, and he knew that his death was not far away. Liancheng Bitu shouted again in his drunkenness: "You're sorry for me, you're sorry for me..." Xiao Shishilang gritted his teeth and murmured: "Don't worry, I will definitely find her back. I only hope that you can treat her well, and that you can live happier lives than before..."