Chapter 4 The fourth time, there is no trace, the antelope hangs its horns and forgets the machine, and the crane combs its feathers
There was a sound of boots at the door, and the man walked in.Wei Xiaobao looked out from under the table, saw that the boots were not big, the person who came was probably a boy about his own age, he immediately felt relieved, put the biscuit in his mouth, but he didn't dare to chew it, he just soaked the biscuit with his saliva until it was softened swallowed.
Only the sound of chewing could be heard coming from the table, the boy was eating the pastries, Wei Xiaobao thought to himself: "He is also a stealer, if I yell and rush out, this kid will run away in fright, I can chew A pause." Then he thought: "I was so stupid just now, I should have just poured a few plates of snacks into my bag and left. This is not the Lichun Courtyard, is there something missing, and I must be responsible for it?"
Suddenly there was a bang bang sound, the boy was beating on something, Wei Xiaobao became curious, and looked around, he saw the boy was about fourteen or fifteen years old, wearing bunt, stretching out his fist to hit a cloth bag hanging from the beam.He hit for a while, and then went to hit the leather man by the wall.The boy punched the leather man in the chest, then stretched out his arms, hugged the leather man's waist, and pushed him to the ground. .Wei Xiaobao laughed, got out from under the table, and said: "The leather man is dead, what's the fun? I'll play with you."
When the boy saw him appearing suddenly, his face was wrapped in a white cloth again, he was slightly startled, but when he heard him say that he came to play with him, his face brightened and he said, "Okay, you come up!"
Wei Xiaobao rushed over and twisted the boy's arms.The boy turned to one side and hooked his right hand, Wei Xiaobao couldn't stand upright and immediately fell down.The boy said: "Bah, you can't wrestle." Wei Xiaobao said: "Who said you can't?" He jumped up and hugged his left leg.The boy stretched out his hand to grab the back of his heart, Wei Xiaobao made a flash, and the boy caught nothing.Wei Xiaobao remembered the way Mao Shiba fought seven big men in the tavern, suddenly he punched the boy with his left hand, hit the boy's jaw, with a bang, it hit right on the spot.
The boy was taken aback, with anger in his eyes.Wei Xiaobao smiled and said: "Bah, you don't know how to wrestle!" The boy didn't say a word, his left hand was dangling, Wei Xiaobao leaned to avoid it, the boy's elbow came out and hit him in the waist.Wei Xiaobao yelled, and squatted down in pain.The boy put his hands under the armpit behind his back, clasped his fingers together, clasped the back of his neck, and lowered his upper body lower and lower.Wei Xiaobao kicked back with his right foot.The boy pushed with both hands, sent Wei Xiaobao's body out, and with a slap, he fell like a shit.
Wei Xiaobao was furious, rolled over, hugged the boy's legs with all his strength, and dragged them hard, the boy couldn't stand upright, fell down, right on Wei Xiaobao's body.The boy was taller than Wei Xiaobao, he immediately used his elbow to force the back of Wei Xiaobao's neck.Wei Xiaobao couldn't breathe well, he stretched out his feet desperately, turned over a few times, and finally fell onto the top, pressing against the boy.It's just that the other person couldn't hold down the opponent with his small body, so the boy rolled up and pressed him down again.
Wei Xiaobao was extremely slippery, let go of the boy's legs, got behind him, and kicked his ass vigorously.The boy grabbed his right leg with his backhand and pulled it hard, Wei Xiaobao fell on his back.The boy jumped up and grabbed his head and neck, shouting: "Surrender or not?"
Wei Xiaobao hooked his left foot and wiped the boy's waist a few times, the boy was ticklish, he smiled and loosened his grip.Taking the opportunity, Wei Xiaobao jumped up and hugged his head and neck.The boy used a wrestling technique, grabbed Wei Xiaobao by the collar, and threw him heavily to the ground.Wei Xiaobao became dizzy for a while, unable to move.The boy laughed loudly and said, "Are you convinced?"
Wei Xiaobao jumped up suddenly, and hit the opponent's lower abdomen with a head hammer.The boy snorted and took a few steps back.Wei Xiaobao charged forward, the boy's body was slightly tilted, his feet hooked and swept across.Wei Xiaobao fell down and hugged his thigh fiercely.The two fell at the same time.For a while the boy was on top, and for a while Wei Xiaobao was on top, and after seventeen or eighteen rolls, the two finally twisted each other, panting, suddenly, the two of them laughed at the same time, both felt that the scuffle was very amusing , slowly let go of his hand.
The boy stretched out his hand and tore off the white cloth from Wei Xiaobao's face, and said with a smile, "Why cover your head?"
Wei Xiaobao was taken aback, and wanted to stretch out his hand to snatch it away, but thought that since the other party had seen his true face, it would be useless to cover up, so he smiled and said: "Cover your face, so that you won't be recognized when you come in to steal food." The boy stood up and said with a smile: "Okay, so you come here to steal food from time to time." Wei Xiaobao said: "Not necessarily from time to time." After speaking, he also stood up, seeing the boy with handsome features and dignified expression, he was very fond of him. Have a good impression.
The boy asked: "What's your name?" Wei Xiaobao said: "My name is Xiao Guizi, what about you?" The boy hesitated for a moment, then said: "My name... is Xiaoxuanzi. Which father-in-law do you work for?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Mr. Hai and I." Xiao Xuanzi nodded, then wiped the sweat from his forehead with Wei Xiaobao's white cloth, picked up a piece of dessert and ate it.Wei Xiaobao refused to admit defeat, thinking that you are daring to steal food, I am no less courageous than you, so he immediately picked up a piece of thousand-layer cake, and put it into his mouth without restraint.
Xiao Xuanzi smiled, and said: "You haven't learned wrestling, but your hands and feet are quite nimble, I can't hold you down, and if you fight for a few more rounds, you will lose." Wei Xiaobao said: "That's not necessarily true, we Let's try fighting again." Xiao Xuanzi said, "Very good!" The two started wrestling again.
Xiaoxuanzi seems to know some wrestling skills, and he is older and stronger than Wei Xiaobao, but Wei Xiaobao has experienced many battles in the wells of Yangzhou City. He has fought countless times with big hooligans and small rascals. Xiaoxuanzi is rich.Finally, he remembered Mao Shiba's lesson, and the scuffle with Xiao Xuanzi was just a game, not a desperate one. Famous stunts such as twisting fingers, pulling braids, biting throat, catching eyes, pulling ears, pinching scrotum, etc. Didn't work.In this way, it would be difficult to win, after several rounds of scuffling, Wei Xiaobao finally got him on his back and couldn't turn over anymore.Xiao Xuanzi smiled and said: "Surrender or not?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I will not surrender even if I die." Xiao Xuanzi laughed and jumped up.
Wei Xiaobao rushed forward and wanted to fight again.Xiao Xuanzi shook his hand and smiled, "I won't fight today, come back tomorrow. But you are not my opponent, so it's useless to fight again." Unconvinced, Wei Xiaobao took out an ingot of silver, about two or three, and said, "Fight again tomorrow, But if you want to gamble, you can also take three taels of silver." Xiao Xuanzi was stunned, and said: "Okay, let's hit the lottery. I will bring the silver tomorrow, and we will fight here again at noon." Wei Xiaobao said: "Dead date See you or leave, once the man says a word,...the horse is hard to chase." He can't remember the "si" of "four horses are hard to chase", so he has to mention it casually.Little Xuanzi laughed loudly, and said: "That's right, once the man has spoken,...the horse is hard to follow." Saying this, he left the house.
Wei Xiaobao grabbed a large handful of snacks, put them in his arms, and went out of the house, remembering that Mao Shiba made a contract to compete in martial arts, even though he was in prison, he had to escape to attend the contract, even though he was seriously injured, he still swore to keep his promise, at the foot of Desheng Mountain Waiting for the two masters, this kind of spirit is really admirable.He heard Mr. Shu's stories about heroes, and he heard a lot of them, and he always fantasized that he was also a great hero, and since he made an appointment for a martial arts competition, why not?Thinking that tomorrow is coming, I have to go back to Mr. Hai tonight, so I followed the same path and slowly found the place where I just gambled.Previously, I walked to the right, so that I went farther and farther. This time, I turned to the left and walked through two corridors. I vaguely remembered seeing the flowers and trees in the garden. I searched all the way, and finally returned to Hai Laogong's residence.
When he walked to the door, he heard Old Man Hai coughing, and asked, "Eunuch, are you better?" Old Man Hai said in a deep voice, "Okay, you bastard! Come in!" Wei Xiaobao went into the room, only to see Mr. Hai sitting on the chair, the collapsed table had been replaced with another one.Hai Laogong asked: "How much did you win?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I won more than ten taels of silver, but...but..." Hai Laogong said: "But what?" Wei Xiaobao said: "But I lent it to Lao Wu." Actually He won more than twenty taels, and besides lending it to Old Wu, he still had eight or nine taels left over. He was afraid that Mr. Hai would ask him to hand it over, and he would inevitably make inaccurate reports. Hai Laogong's face darkened, and he said: "What's the use of lending to Old Wu? He doesn't go to the study. Why don't you lend it to the Wen brothers?" Wei Xiaobao didn't know the reason, and said: "The Wen brothers didn't ask I'll borrow it." Hai Laogong said: "I didn't borrow it from you, wouldn't you think of a way to lend it to him? Have you forgotten what I told you?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I...I killed this kid last night, I was so scared that I forgot everything. I want to lend it to Brother Wen, yes, yes, your old man has indeed ordered it." Mr. Hai snorted, and said: "Kill a lot of people. What's the big deal? But you're young, so it's no wonder you haven't killed anyone. You haven't forgotten that book?" Wei Xiaobao said: "That book... ...Book...I...I..." Mr. Hai snorted again, and said: "Really forget everything?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Elder-in-law, I...I have a headache, I'm afraid...it's terrible, you Coughing like this again, I'm really worried, what... everything is confused." Hai Laogong said: "Okay, come here!" Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes!" and walked a few steps closer.Mr. Hai said: "I'll say it again, if you don't remember again, I'll kill you." Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes, yes." He thought: "Just say it again, and I won't forget it in a hundred years." Mr. Hai said: "Go and win the money from Wen's brothers. If they lose, lend them the money. The more you borrow, the better. After a few days, you will ask them to take you to the upper study. They owe you money." You don't dare to refuse your money, if you push back, you say I will settle the score with Wu Laogong, the head of the study. If the brothers of the Wen family don't pay the money, they will take advantage of the emperor's absence..." Wei Xiaobao said: "The emperor?" Hailao Gongdao: "What?" Wei Xiaobao said: "No...it's nothing." Mr. Hai said: "They will ask you what you are doing in the study, and you just say that people look forward to high places and look forward to seeing the emperor, so you can work in the study. Wen Wen My brother will not let you see the emperor, and when he takes you there, the emperor will definitely not be in the study, so you have to try to steal a book." Hearing him mentioning the emperor one after another, Wei Xiaobao thought: "Could this be the imperial palace? Isn't it a big brothel in Beijing? Oh, hey, yes, yes, if it weren't for the imperial palace, how could there be such a grandeur? They are eunuchs who serve the emperor." Although Wei Xiaobao had heard about the emperor, empress, prince, princess, court ladies, and eunuchs, he only knew that the emperor must wear dragon robes, and he didn't know what the rest of them looked like.He had watched a lot of white operas in Yangzhou, but the eunuchs on the stage were completely different from Mr. Hai and Old Wu in their costumes. A nice sentence.He spends a day with Mr. Hai, and gambles with Old Wu and Wen's brothers for a long time, but he doesn't know that they are eunuchs. Now he heard Mr. Hai say this, and then he gradually realized, and thought: "Ah, in this way, Haven't I become a little eunuch?" Hai Laogong sternly said: "Do you understand?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes, yes, I understand, I want to go to the Emperor... the Emperor's study." Hai Laogong said: "What are you doing in the Emperor's study? Are you going to play?" Wei Xiaobao said: "To steal a book." Hai Laogong said: "Steal what book?" Wei Xiaobao said: "This... this... what book... I... I can't remember." Hai Laogong said: " Let me say it again, remember it well. It is a Buddhist scripture called "Forty-Two Chapters". What's it called?" Wei Xiaobao said happily, "It's called the Forty-Two Chapters." Mr. Hai heard the joy in his words, and asked, "What's the fun?" Wei Xiaobao said, "As soon as you mention it, I will I remember, so happy." It turned out that he heard Mr. Hai said that he wanted him to go to the upper study room to "steal books". "Stealing" is not difficult, but "books" are difficult for people.He can't read a load of watermelon-sized characters, and he can't tell what book it is, but he can't do it even if he kills his head, until he hears that the title of the book is "Forty-two Chapters".I couldn't help being elated, I don't know what the "Zhang Jing" is, but I know the three characters "forty-two", and I know three of the five characters, I can't help being very proud. Hai Laogong said again: "Stealing books in the upper study room, your hands and feet must be clean and neat. If people see you, you will lose a hundred lives." Wei Xiaobao said: "I understand this, stealing things for others I caught it, is there still a good show to sing?" With an idea, he said: "But I will never invite your father-in-law out." Mr. Hai sighed: "It doesn't matter whether you recruit me or not." Coughed for a while , said: "You did a good job today, and you actually won money. Didn't they become suspicious?" Wei Xiaobao smiled and said: "Hehe, no, how could it be?" Wanting to praise himself, he finally restrained himself.Hai Laogong said: "Don't be lazy, if you have nothing to do, practice more." Wei Xiaobao agreed, and walked into the room, he saw bowls and chopsticks, four dishes and one soup on the table, no one had touched it, he hurriedly said: "Eunuch, you don't want to eat? I'll pack it for you." Hai Laogong said: "No Hungry, don’t eat, you can eat it yourself.” Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, he didn't have time to pack the rice, so he picked up a piece of braised pork and ate it. Although the dish was already cold and he swallowed it, it was indescribably delicious. He thought: "I don't know who brought these meals. Don't worry about such trivial things Ask more, keep your eyes open, and you will know slowly.” Then he thought: “If this is really the imperial palace, then Old Wu, Brother Wen, and that little Xuanzi are all eunuchs. How do you look like the empress? You have to see it clearly. Back in Yangzhou, hehe, I’m so arrogant when I say this. I don’t know if Brother Mao can escape from the palace? I didn’t hear them talking about taking money while gambling Most of the people living here escaped." After the meal, fearing that Mr. Hai would become suspicious, he took six dice and tossed them in the bowl endlessly. After tossing for a while, he felt his eyelids getting heavy. He hadn't slept all night last night, and he was so tired now. Very soon, he fell asleep soon.
This sleep lasted until evening, and then a rough eunuch brought food. Wei Xiaobao served Mr. Hai to eat a bowl of rice, and then helped him go to bed. He slept on the small bed, thinking: "Tomorrow, the most important thing is to compete with Xiao Xuanzi. We must win him." Close your eyes, think back Mao Shiba couldn't remember the way he fought the Manchurian warriors in the tavern, but he couldn't remember clearly, and he couldn't help feeling a little regretful: "Brother Mao wanted to teach me martial arts, but I refused to learn. If I learn along the way, little Xuanzi Even though he is stronger than me, how can he be my opponent? If he rides again tomorrow, he won't be able to turn over. It doesn't matter if he loses money. Such a big loss of face, I, the 'little white dragon' Wei Xiaobao, can't do it in the arena. Don't mess around." Suddenly I thought: "Manchurian warriors can't beat Brother Mao, and Brother Mao is no match for the old tortoise, why don't you trick the old tortoise to teach me some skills?" Immediately he said: "Elder-in-law, you want me to go to the study to get some books. There is a difficulty in the middle." Mr. Hai said: "What's the problem?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Today when I came back from gambling, I met a... little eunuch who blocked the way and asked me to give him the money. If I refused, he would fight with me. He said that I beat him, so he let me go. I fought with him for a long time, so... so I couldn't even come back to eat in time." Hai Laogong said: "You lost, didn't you?" Wei Xiaobao said: "He is tall He is strong and strong, much stronger than me. He said he wants to compete with me every day, and when I win against him, he will not come to pester me." Hai Laogong said: "What's the name of this little baby? Which room is it from? " Wei Xiaobao said: "His name is Xiaoxuanzi, but I don't know which room he is from." Hai Laogong said: "It must be that you won the money, and you are so arrogant and annoying, otherwise others would not find you." Wei Xiaobao said: "I am not convinced, if I fight against him tomorrow, I don't know if I can win. "Old Man Hai snorted, and said: "You're thinking of asking me to teach you martial arts again. I told you not to teach it, and if you don't teach it, it's useless for you to go around again." Wei Xiaobao was startled inwardly: "Old turtle is smart, don't fall for this." He said: "This little Xuanzi doesn't know martial arts, I want to beat him. I don't need to learn any martial arts, who wants you to teach me? Today I am clearly Riding on him, it’s just that he has great strength and turned over. Tomorrow I will try to lift him up, and this guy may not be able to turn over like a turtle.” He had already restrained himself this day and did not say a word of foul language, and finally couldn’t help but say said a word. Hai Laogong said: "If you think he can't turn over, that's easy." Wei Xiaobao said: "I don't think there is any difficulty, I will lift his shoulders firmly tomorrow." Hai Laogong said: "Hmph, what's the use of lifting his shoulders? Whether you can turn over depends entirely on the strength in your waist, and you have to put your knees against the acupuncture points in his back. Come here, and I'll show you." Wei Xiaobao jumped off the bed, walked to his bed, Mr. Hai felt a spot on his lower back, pressed lightly, Wei Xiaobao felt sore and weak all over.Hai Laogong said: "Do you remember?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes, I will try it tomorrow, I don't know if it will work or not?" Hai Laogong said angrily: "What will it work? It is a hundred-shot-and-one-shot-and-one-shot." He stretched out his hands and pressed lightly on both sides of his head and neck.Wei Xiaobao yelled "Ah", he felt his chest was suffocated and he couldn't breathe.Hai Laogong said: "If you use your strength to attack his two acupoints, he won't have the strength to fight you." Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, and said: "It's done, I will definitely beat him tomorrow." The word "quasi" was learned during daytime gambling.Going back to bed and falling asleep, thinking of the tomorrow when "Little White Dragon" Wei Xiaobao beat Xiao Xuanzi and shouted "Surrender", he was very proud.
The next day, Old Wu came to ask him to gamble.One of the Wen family brothers was named Wen Youdao and the other was named Wen Youfang. When it was the turn of the two brothers to be dealers, Wei Xiaobao resorted to tricks and won them over twenty taels of silver.The two brothers were unlucky, within half an hour, the fifty taels of money had been lost.Wei Xiaobao lent them twenty taels of silver, and when the betting stopped, the Wen family brothers lost the twenty taels of silver again. All Wei Xiaobao remembered was the martial arts contest with Xiao Xuanzi, once the game was over, he ran to that room.There were still many plates of snacks on the table, he took a few pieces to eat, he heard the sound of boots, he was afraid that it wasn't Xiaoxuanzi who came, he wanted to get under the table first, but he heard Xiaoxuanzi outside the door Shouted: "Xiao Guizi, Xiao Guizi!" Wei Xiaobao jumped to the door, and said with a smile: "Date, see you or leave." Xiao Xuanzi also laughed: "Haha, date, see you or leave." Walk into the room.Wei Xiaobao saw that his new clothes were very gorgeous, he couldn't help but feel jealous, thought: "I will tear your new clothes later, I will make you feel unimpressed!" With a loud cry, he rushed towards him. Xiao Xuanzi shouted: "Good time." He twisted his arms and swept his left foot across.Wei Xiaobao couldn't stand upright, swayed a few times, then fell down, pulling Xiaoxuanzi to the ground as well. Wei Xiaobao rolled over, turned over and pressed on Xiaoxuanzi's back, remembering what Hai Laogong taught, he reached out to grab the acupoints on his back, but he has never practiced the kung fu of hitting the acupoints, how can he easily grasp the acupoints?The part he held was slightly off, Xiao Xuanzi had already turned over, grabbed his left arm, and twisted it backwards forcefully.Wei Xiaobao exclaimed: "Ah, you are shameless, are you trying to bend someone's arm?" Xiao Xuanzi laughed and said, "Learning to wrestle is learning to bend someone's arm, why are you shameless?" He slammed into his lower back hard, hit his vest on his head, passed his right hand through his armpit, and threw it upwards vigorously.Xiao Xuanzi's body flew over his head, and fell to the ground with a slap. Xiao Xuanzi turned over and jumped up, said: "So you also know how to do the 'Antelope Hanging Horns'." Wei Xiaobao didn't know what the "Antelope Hanging Horns" technique was, so he won the move by mistake, very proud, and said: " What is this 'antelope hanging horn', I still have a lot of powerful tricks I haven't used yet." Xiao Xuanzi said happily: "That can't be better, let's do some tricks again." Wei Xiaobao thought to himself: "So you have learned martial arts, no wonder you can't beat you. But if you make a move, I will learn a move, at most I will give you a few more blows, I can always learn your tricks." Seeing Xiaoxuanzi again When he rushed over, he also rushed forward.Unexpectedly, Xiaoxuanzi's pounce was fake, when Wei Xiaobao pounced, he had already stopped his momentum, stepped aside, stretched out his hand to push him on the back.Wei Xiaobao rushed to nothing, he couldn't stop his feet already, he pushed him smoothly, and immediately fell down heavily with a bang. Xiao Xuanzi cheered loudly, jumped over and rode on his back, and shouted, "Surrender or not?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Don't surrender!" He wanted to straighten his waist and turn over, suddenly his waist felt numb, and the two acupoints on the back of his waist were pressed by Xiaoxuanzi's fingers, that was exactly the technique that Old Man Hai taught him last night, even though he Learned it, but let the opponent use it first.Wei Xiaobao struggled a few times, but still couldn't break free, so he could only shout: "Okay, let me down once!" Xiao Xuanzi laughed out loud and let him get up.Wei Xiaobao suddenly stretched out his foot and tripped, Xiao Xuanzi leaned over and wanted to fall, Wei Xiaobao punched him right in the middle.Xiaoxuanzi groaned in pain, bent down, Wei Xiaobao jumped up from behind, wrapping his arms around his head and neck.Xiao Xuanzi was dizzy for a while, and fell to the ground.Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, he clasped his hands tightly and asked, "Surrender or not?" Xiao Xuanzi snorted, and suddenly his ribs slammed backwards.Wei Xiaobao's chest and ribs were so painful that he wanted to break them, he yelled, and fell on his back.Xiao Xuanzi turned over and sat on his chest, this time he won again, but he was out of breath, and he was so tired that he couldn't catch his breath, he asked: "Admitted...Admitted...Are you acquiesced?" Wei Xiaobao said: " Don't...don't...convince, one hundred...one...ten thousand are not convinced. You just happened to win." Xiao Xuanzi said: "If you don't accept it, then...you get up and fight." Wei Xiaobao Putting his hands on the ground, he just wanted to bounce hard, but the opponent's vital parts of his chest were pinned down, and he couldn't use any strength. After a long stalemate, he had to surrender again. Xiao Xuanzi stood up, but felt his arms go limp.Wei Xiaobao tried his best to stand up, swaying his body, and said: "Tomorrow...tomorrow, I will fight again, and I must...have to ask you to surrender." Xiao Xuanzi laughed: "If you fight a hundred times again, you will... also ... is also a loser, you have the guts to fight again tomorrow." Wei Xiaobao said: "I'm afraid you don't have the guts, why don't I have the guts? Dead date, see or leave." Xiao Xuanzi said: "Okay, dead date, Be there or leave." The two got into a fight and didn't mention the money betting.Since Xiaoxuanzi didn't mention it, Wei Xiaobao happily pretended to forget, if he won, the silver would naturally be necessary.
Wei Xiaobao returned to the house, and said to Mr. Hai: "Elder-in-law, your method doesn't work, it's too common." Mr. Hai snorted, and said, "It's worthless, and I lost again." Wei Xiaobao said: "If you use me Although your own method is not necessarily sure to win, it is not necessarily sure to lose. But your method is too pusty, and others know it too. What's so strange?" Mr. Hai wondered: "He also knows this method? Give it a try. Look." Wei Xiaobao thought to himself: "You are blind, let me show you, can you see?" Suddenly he thought: "I don't know if he is really blind or not, I have to try him." He bumped back and said: "He bumped like this, and only hit three thousand bones in my whole body, and every one of them hurts." Mr. Hai sighed, and said, "How can I see this bump? ?" Standing up tremblingly, he said, "Try to imitate him." Wei Xiaobao secretly rejoiced: "The old turtle is really blind." With the vest facing him, he thrust his elbows and slowly slammed back, saying : "He hit me like this with his elbow." When his elbow touched Hai Laogong's chest, he stopped exerting force. Mr. Hai hummed, and said: "This is an 'armpit hammer', that's nothing." Wei Xiaobao said, "There's more." He took Mr. Hai's left hand, put it on his right shoulder, and said, "He With a strong shake, I flew over his head." This move was actually his triumph of throwing Xiao Xuanzi down, and he deliberately turned it upside down to say that he wanted to test Mr. Hai.Hai Laogong said: "This is 'Antelope Hanging Horn'." Wei Xiaobao said: "So you already knew about it." Then he took his arm and turned it slowly.Hai Laogong said: "Well, this is the third hand in 'Double Plum'. What else?" Wei Xiaobao said: "It turns out that Xiaoxuanzi's tricks are well-known. I messed with him, and those tricks must have a few nice tricks. I rushed towards him, but this kid moved aside, but Push me on my back, and I will..." Mr. Hai didn't wait for him to finish, and asked: "Where did he push you?" Wei Xiaobao said: "When he pushed me, I fell to the ground, how can I still do it? Remember where to push it." Hai Laogong said: "Remember to see, is it pushed here?" He stretched out his hand to press the back of his left shoulder.Wei Xiaobao said: "No." Hai Laogong said: "Is it here?" He pressed the back of his right shoulder.Wei Xiaobao still said: "No." Mr. Hai even pressed six or seven parts, but Wei Xiaobao said no.Hai Laogong stretched out his palm and pressed under his right waist and ribs, and asked: "Is it here?" He said and pushed lightly.Wei Xiaobao staggered, fell a few steps, and immediately remembered the place where Xiao Xuanzi pushed him, and said loudly: "Yes, that's right, it's right here. Father-in-law, how do you know?" Mr. Hai didn't answer, but pondered for a while, and said: "I taught you the two methods, and you said he can do it, is this true?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Of course it is true. Not only will it press my lower back, but it will also lift my chest. I couldn't breathe immediately, so I had to surrender for a while. This is called..." Mr. Hai ignored his name, stretched out his hand, and said, "Where is he pressing on your chest?" Wei Xiaobao took his hand and pressed it on his chest, where Xiao Xuanzi restrained him just now, and said: " Here." Mr. Hai sighed, and said: "This is the 'Purple Palace Point', this child's master is a high-ranking person." Wei Xiaobao said: "That's nothing, a man can bend and stretch, and keep the green hills, so he doesn't have to worry about running out of firewood." (During the rush, he changed "not afraid of running out of firewood" into "not afraid of running out of firewood".) I... I, Wei... ...My little Guizi lost a battle today, so it's not too difficult to win him back tomorrow." Mr. Hai went back to the chair, flexed and stretched the five fingers of his right hand, stretched and bent, closed his eyes and meditated, after a while, he said: "He can 'little grasping hand', that's nothing, but his palm pushed On the 'Yishe point' on your right waist, this is the Wudang school's 'Mianzhang' technique. Later, he presses your 'Jinshuo point', and then presses your 'Zigong point', which is the Wudang school's acupuncture technique. It turns out that there is a Wudang master hidden in our palace. Well, very good, very good! How old do you think that little... Xiao Xuanzi is?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Much older than me." Hai Laogong said: "How old is older?" Wei Xiaobao said: "How old." Hai Laogong said angrily: "How old is what? How old is one or two years older, eight How old is nine years old? If he is eight or nine years older than you, what are you going to do with him?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Okay, let's say he is only a year or two older than me, but he is much taller than me." OK The opponent is old and tall, so it is not too embarrassing to lose, if it is not for Mr. Hai to teach martial arts, he will definitely not talk about the defeat in the competition. Hai Laogong pondered: "This kid is fourteen or fifteen years old, um, how long did it take you to fight him before you lost?" Wei Xiaobao said: "At least it took two or three hours." Hai Laogong's face sank, and he shouted: "Don't Bragging! How long is it?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Even if it's not an hour, it's more than half an hour." Mr. Hai snorted, and said: "I'll ask you, so you can tell me well. This man has learned martial arts. You haven't learned However, losing is not ashamed. In a fight, it doesn't matter if you lose ten times or eight times. Even if you lose a hundred times or two hundred times, you are still young, so what are you afraid of? As long as you win the last time, you can win the opponent again. I don’t dare to fight with you, that’s a hero.” Wei Xiaobao said: “Yes! In the past, Han Gaozu was defeated in every battle, but the last time he beat the King of Chu to hang himself in the Wujiang River...” Hai Laogong said: “What is the Wujiang River hanged? Wujiang slays himself." Wei Xiaobao said: "Whether you hang yourself or slay yourself, you lose and kill yourself." Hai Laogong said: "You always have something to say. Let me ask you, how many times did you lose in the fight with Xiaoxuanzi today?" Wei Xiaobao said: "It's only once or twice, two or three times." Hai Laogong said: "It's four times , isn’t it?” Wei Xiaobao said: “The ones who really lost were only two times, and the other two times he was foolish, so I don’t count myself as losers.” Hai Laogong said: "How often do you beat each time?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I can't count the time, sometimes it looks like defecating, sometimes it looks like urinating." Hai Laogong said: "Nonsense! What sometimes looks like defecating and sometimes looks like urinating?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Poop slowly, and it won't take long to pee." Mr. Hai smiled slightly, and said: "Although this boy's metaphor is vulgar, it makes sense." After thinking for a while, he said: "You have never learned martial arts, this little Xuanzi has to hang around you for a while before he knocks you down. This 'small grasping hand' kung fu is new, you don't have to be afraid. I will teach you the 'big grasping hand' all the way, you should remember it well, and fight him tomorrow." Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, and said: "He used Small grapplers, let's use the big grapplers to overwhelm the small ones, and we will surely win." Hai Laogong said: "That's not necessarily the case. The big and small grapplers have their own strengths, it depends on who can practice well. If he can practice well You, the small grappling hand is better than the big grappling hand. The big grappling hand has 18 moves in total, each of which has seven or eight changes, and you can’t remember them all at once, so learn one or two moves first and then talk about it.” Immediately stood up Come on, put on a posture, perform it again, and said: "This trick is called 'Crane Combing Ling'. You have practiced it first, and I will dismantle it." Wei Xiaobao remembered it after reading it once. After practicing it seven or eight times, he thought he was very proficient, and said, "You're good at it!" Hai Laogong sat on the chair, stretched out his left arm, and grabbed his shoulder, Wei Xiaobao stretched out his hand to block, but was a step slower, he had already grabbed his shoulder.Hai Laogong said: "What are you familiar with? Practice again." Wei Xiaobao practiced a few more times, and then split the trick with Mr. Hai.Hai Laogong stretched out his left arm, his posture and moves were still exactly the same as before.Wei Xiaobao had been prepared for a long time, he stretched out his hand to block as soon as he moved his hand, but he was still a little slow, and he still grabbed his shoulder.Old Man Hai snorted, and cursed: "Little idiot!" Wei Xiaobao cursed in his heart: "Old turtle!" Confused, I don't know why. Mr. Hai said: "If I catch you, you will practice for three more years, and you won't be able to avoid it. Let me tell you, you can't avoid it. If I grab your shoulder, you have to cut my wrist with your palm. Offense is defense." Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, and said: "So that's how it is, it's so easy! If you said it earlier, I would have done it long ago." After Hai Laogong grabbed it with his left hand, Wei Xiaobao sent out his right palm to cut his wrist, unexpectedly Hai Laogong didn't shrink back , the palm turned slightly, and with a slap, he slapped him hard.Wei Xiaobao was furious, and also slapped him. Hai Laogong flipped his left palm, grabbed his wrist, swung him out of the way, and said with a smile: "Little idiot, do you remember?" He fell down and hit the wall with his shoulder, fortunately Mr. Hai's shot was very light, otherwise his shoulder would have been broken. Wei Xiaobao was furious, the word "old turtle" just came to his mouth, he finally stopped it in time, and then he thought: "These two moves are very good, tomorrow I will compete with Xiaoxuanzi, so I will use the **** to make sure Xiaoxuanzi Xuanzi can't resist it." Immediately he got up, thought about these two tricks of Old Man Hai, kept them in mind, and then went to the audition again. After trying more than ten times, Mr. Hai's mysterious and inscrutable technique no longer felt too strange to his eyes, and he finally practiced to the point where he could no longer catch him, but he still couldn't avoid that slap. It's just that Mr. Hai didn't use as much force as he did the first time. A light swipe of his finger on his face was considered a slap. Although this slap didn't hurt, it always hit him every time.Wei Xiaobao didn't hit back, and Mr. Hai didn't catch him and throw him away. Wei Xiaobao was frustrated, and asked: "Grandpa, how can you avoid this attack?" Hai Laogong smiled slightly and said: "If I want to hit you, you won't be able to avoid it even if you practice for ten years, but Xiaoxuanzi I can't hit you either. Let's practice the second move." Standing up, he tried out the second move of the big grabbing hand "ape picking fruit", and dismantled it with him in the same way. Wei Xiaobao is very lazy by nature, originally he would never put his heart into learning kung fu, but he has a strong desire to be competitive, he only wants to learn a few clever moves, forcing Xiao Xuanzi to yell for surrender, so he puts his heart into learning moves.Mr. Hai was actually not bored either.From noon to evening that day, the two kept dismantling their techniques.Hai Laogong was sitting on the chair, his arms seemed to be able to expand and contract at will, as long as he moved casually, Wei Xiaobao got hit on his body, finally his strikes were very light, and he didn't use any force in every move.But even so, Wei Xiaobao slept on the bed that night, he felt pain all over his body from head to legs, during most of the day, he suffered at least four to five hundred blows.他躺在床上，只是暗骂：“老乌龟，打了老子这么多下。明日老子打赢了小玄子，老乌龟，你就向我磕三百个响头，老子也决不跟你学功夫了。”
次日上午，韦小宝赌完钱后，便去跟小玄子比武，眼见他又换了件新衣，心道：“你这小子，天天穿新衣，你上院子嫖姑娘吗？”妒意大盛，上手便撕他衣服，嗤的一声响，将他衣襟撕了一条大缝，这一来，可忘了新学的手法，给小玄子一拳打在腰里，痛得哇哇大叫。小玄子乘机伸指戳出，戳中他左腿。韦小宝左腿酸麻，跪了下来，给小玄子在后一推，立时伏倒。小玄子纵身骑在他背上，又制住了他“意舍穴”，韦小宝只得投降。 他站起身来，凝了凝神，待得小玄子扑将过来，便即使出那招“仙鹤梳翎”，去切对方手腕。小玄子急忙缩手，伸拳欲打，这一招已给韦小宝料到，一把抓住他手腕，扭了过来，跟着以左肘在他背心急撞，小玄子大叫一声，痛得无力反抗，这一回合却是韦小宝胜了。 两人比武以来，韦小宝首次得胜，心中喜悦不可言喻。他虽在扬州得胜山下杀过一名军官，在宫中又杀过小桂子，但两次均是使诈。他生平和人打架，除了欺侮八九岁的小孩子战无不胜之外，和大人打架，向来必输，偶然占一两次上风，也必是出到用口咬、撒泥沙等等卑鄙手段。至于在小饭店桌子底下用刀剁人脚板，其无甚光彩之处，也不待人言而后知。以真本事获胜，这一役实是生平第一次。他一得意，不免心浮气粗，第三回合却又输了。 第四回合上韦小宝留了神，使出那招“猿猴摘果”，和对方扭打良久，竟然僵持不下，到后来两人都没了力气，搂住了一团，不停喘气，只得罢斗。 小玄子甚喜，笑道：“你今天……今天的本事长进了，跟你比武有些味道，是谁……谁教你了？”韦小宝也气喘吁吁的道：“这本事我……我早就有的，不过前两天没使出来，明儿我还有更……更加厉害的手段，你敢不敢领教？”小玄子哈哈大笑，说道：“自然要领教的，可别是大叫投降的手段。”韦小宝道：“呸，明天定要你大叫投降。”
韦小宝回到屋中，得意洋洋的道：“公公，你的大擒拿手果然使得，我扭住了那小子的手腕，再用手肘在他背上这么一撞，这小子只好认输。” 海老公问道：“今日你和他打了几个回合？”韦小宝道：“打了四场，各赢两场。本来我可以赢足三场，第三场太不小心。”海老公道：“你说话七折八扣，倘若打了四场，你最多只赢一场。”韦小宝笑了笑，说道：“第一场我没赢。第二场却的的确确是我赢了，若有虚言，天诛地灭。第三场他不算输。第四场打得大家没了气力，约定明天再打过。”海老公道：“你老老实实说给我听，一招一式，细细比来。” 韦小宝记心虽好，但毕竟于武术所知太少，这四场一招一式如何打法，却说不完全，他只记得第三场取胜的那一招得意之作。可是海老公偏要细问他如何落败。韦小宝只想含糊其辞的混了过去，最后总是给逼问到了真相。小玄子用以取胜的招式，海老公一一举出，便如亲见一般，比之韦小宝还说得详尽十倍。他这么一提，韦小宝便记得果是如此。 韦小宝道：“公公，你定有千里眼，否则小玄子那些手法，你怎能知道得清清楚楚？” 海老公低头沉思，喃喃道：“果真是武当高手，果真是武当高手。”韦小宝又惊又喜，道：“你说小玄子这小子是武当派高手？我能跟这高手斗得不分上下，哈哈……”海老公呸的一声，道：“别臭美啦！谁说是他了？我是说教他拳脚的师父。”韦小宝道：“那么你是什么派的？咱们这一派武功天下无敌，自然比武当派厉害得多，那也不用说啦。”他还不知海老公是何门派，便先大肆吹嘘。 海老公道：“我是少林派。”韦小宝大喜，道：“那好极了，武当派的武功一遇上咱们少林派，那是落花流水，夹着尾巴便逃。”海老公哼的一声，说道：“我又没收你做弟子，你怎么能算少林派？”韦小宝讪讪的道：“我又不说我是少林派，我学的是少林派武功，那总不错罢？”海老公道：“小玄子使的既是武当派正宗擒拿手，咱们便须以少林派正宗擒拿手法对付，否则就敌他不过。”韦小宝道：“是啊，我打输了事小，连累了咱们少林派的威名，却大大的不值得了。”少林派的威名到底有多大，他全然不知，但如自己跟少林派拉扯上一些干系，总不会是蚀本生意。 海老公道：“昨天我传你这两手大擒拿手，本意只想打得那小子知难而退，不再纠缠不清，你便可以去上书房拿书。可是眼前局面有点儿不同了，这小子果是武当派嫡系，这一十八路大擒拿手，便须一招一式的从头教起。你会不会弓箭步？”韦小宝道：“弓箭步吗，那当然是弯弓射箭时的姿式了。”海老公脸一沉，说道：“要学功夫，便得虚心，不会的就说不会。学武的人，最忌自作聪明，自以为是。前腿屈膝，其形如弓，称为'弓足'；后腿斜挺，其形如箭，称为'箭足'，两者合称，就叫做'弓箭步'。”说着摆了个“弓箭步”的姿式。韦小宝依样照做，说道：“这有什么难哪？我一天摆他个百儿八十的。” 海老公道：“我不要你摆百儿八十的，就只要你摆一个。你这么摆着，我不叫站起来，你可不许动。”说着摸他双腿姿式，要他前腿更曲，后腿更直。 韦小宝道：“那也挺容易呀。”可是这么摆着姿式不动，不到半炷香时分，双腿已酸麻之极，叫道：“这可行了罢？”海老公道：“还差得远呢。”韦小宝道：“我练这怪模样，又管什么用？难道还能将小玄子打倒么？”海老公道：“这'弓箭步'练得稳了，人家就推你不倒，用处大着呢。”韦小宝强辩：“就算人家推倒了我，我翻个身便站起来了，又不吃亏。”海老公缓缓点头，不去理他。 韦小宝见他点头，便挺直身子，拍了拍酸麻的双腿。海老公喝道：“谁叫你站直了？快摆'弓箭步'！”韦小宝道：“我要拉尿！”海老公喝道：“不准！”韦小宝道：“我要拉屎！”海老公道：“不准！”韦小宝道：“这可当真要拉出来啦！”海老公叹了口气，只得任由他上茅房，松散双腿。 韦小宝人虽聪明，但要他循规蹈矩，一板一眼的练功，却说什么也不干。海老公倒也不再勉强，只传了他几下擒拿扭打的手法。拆解之时，须得弯腰转身、蹲倒伏低，海老公却不跟他来这一套，只是出声指点，伸手一摸，便知他姿式手法是否有误。
次日韦小宝又去和小玄子比武，自忖昨天四场比赛，输了两场，赢了一场，今日多学了许多功夫，自非四场全胜不可。哪知一动手，几招新手法用到小玄子身上之时，竟然并不管用，或是给他以特异手法化解了开去，一上来两场连输。韦小宝又惊又怒，在第三场中小心翼翼，才拗住了小玄子的左掌向后力扳，小玄子翻不过来，只得认输。 韦小宝得意洋洋，第四场便又输了，给小玄子骑在头颈之中，双腿挟住了头颈，险些窒息。他投降之后，站起身来，骂道：“他妈的，你……” 小玄子脸一沉，喝道：“你说什么？”神色间登时有股凛然之威。韦小宝一惊，寻思：“不对，这里是皇宫，可不能说粗话。茅大哥说，到了北京，不能露出破绽，我说他妈的粗话，便露出了他妈的破绽，拆穿了西洋镜。”忙道：“我说我这一招'他妈的'式打你不过，只好投降。”小玄子脸露笑容，问道：“你这招手法叫做'他妈的'？那是什么意思？” 韦小宝心道：“还好，还好！这小乌龟整天在皇宫之中，不懂外边骂人的言语。”便胡诌道：“这式'蹋马蹄'本来是学马失前蹄，蹋了下去，教你不防，我就翻上来压住你。哪知你不上当，这'蹋马蹄'式便用不出了。” 小玄子哈哈大笑，道：“什么蹋马蹄，就是蹋牛蹄也赢不了我。明天还敢不敢再打？”韦小宝道：“那还用说，自然要打。喂，小玄子，我问你一句话，你可得老老实实，不能瞒我。”小玄子道：“什么话？”韦小宝道：“教你功夫的师父，是武当派高手，是不是？”小玄子奇道：“咦，你怎么知道？”韦小宝道：“我从你的手法之中看了出来。”小玄子道：“你懂得我的功夫？那叫什么名堂？”韦小宝道：“那还有不知道的？这是武当派嫡传正宗的'小擒拿手'，在江湖上也算是第一流的武功了，只不过遇到我少林派嫡传正宗的'大擒拿手'，你终于差了一级。” 小玄子哈哈大笑，说道：“大吹牛皮，也不害羞！今天比武，是你赢了还是我赢了？”韦小宝道：“胜败兵家常事，不以输赢论英雄。”小玄子笑道：“不以成败论英雄。”韦小宝道：“输赢就是成败。”他曾听说书先生说过“不以成败论英雄”的话，只是“成败”二字太难，一时想不起来，却给小玄子说了出来，不由得微感佩服：“你也不过比我大得一两岁，知道的事倒多。”
他回到屋中，叹了口气，道：“公公，我在学功夫，人家也在学，不过人家的师父本事大，教的法子好。”他不说自己不成，却赖海老公教法不佳。 海老公道：“今天定是四场全输了！浑小子不怪自己不中用，却来埋怨旁人。”韦小宝道：“呸！那怎么会四场全输？多少也得赢他这么一两场、两三场。我今天问过了，人家的师父的的确确是武当派嫡传正宗。”海老公道：“他认了吗？”语调中显得颇为兴奋。韦小宝道：“我问他：'教你功夫的师父，是武当派的高手，是不是？'他说：'咦，你怎么知道？'那不是认了？” 海老公喃喃的道：“所料不错，果然是武当派的。”随即呆呆出神，似在思索一件疑难之事，过了良久，道：“咱们来学几招勾脚的法子。” 如此韦小宝每天向海老公学招，跟小玄子比武。学招之时，凡是遇上难些的，韦小宝便敷衍含糊过去。海老公却也由他，撇开了扎根基的功夫，只是教他躲闪、逃避，以及诸般取巧、占便宜的法门。可是与小玄子相斗之时，他招式增加，小玄子的招式也相应增加，打来打去，十次中仍有七八次是韦小宝输了。
这些日子中，每日上午，韦小宝总是去和老吴、平威、温有道、温有方等太监赌钱。起初几日他用白布蒙脸，后来渐渐越蒙越少。众人虽见他和小桂子相貌完全不同，但一来赌得兴起，小桂子以前到底是怎生模样，心中也模模糊糊；二来他不住借钱于人，人人都爱交他这个朋友；三来他逐日少蒙白布，旁人慢慢的习以为常，居然无人相询。赌罢局散，他便去和小玄子比武，午饭后学习武功。 擒拿法越来越难，韦小宝已懒得记忆，更懒得练习，好在海老公倒也不如何逼迫督促，只是顺其自然。 时日匆匆，韦小宝来到皇宫不觉已有两个月，他每日里有钱可赌，日子过得虽不逍遥自在，却也快乐。只可惜不能污言秽语，肆意谩骂，又不敢在宫内偷鸡摸狗，撒赖使泼，未免美中不足。有时也想到该当逃出宫去，但北京城中一人不识，想想有些胆怯，便在宫中一天又一天的耽了下来。韦小宝和小玄子两个月斗了下来，日日见面，交情越来越好。韦小宝输得惯了，反正“不以输赢论英雄”，赌场上得意武场上输，倒也不放在心上。他和小玄子两人都觉得，只消有一日不打架比武，便浑身不得劲。韦小宝的武功进展缓慢，小玄子却也平平，韦小宝虽然输多赢少，却也决不是只输不赢。 这两个月赌了下来，温氏兄弟已欠了韦小宝二百多两银子。这一日还没赌完，两兄弟互相使个眼色，温有道向韦小宝道：“桂兄弟，咱们有件事商量，借一步说话。”韦小宝道：“好，要银子使吗？拿去不妨。”温有方道：“多谢了！”两兄弟走出门去，韦小宝跟着出去，三人到了隔壁的厢房。 温有道说道：“桂兄弟，你年纪轻轻，为人慷慨大方，当真难得。”韦小宝给他这么一奉承，登时心花怒放，说道：“哪里，哪里！自己哥儿们，你借我的，我借你的，那打什么紧！有借有还，上等之人！”这两个月下来，他已学了一口京片子，虽然偶尔露出几句扬州土话，在旁人听来，却也已不觉得如何刺耳。 温有道说道：“我哥儿俩这两个月来手气不好，欠下你的银子着实不少，你兄弟虽然不在乎，我二人心中却十分不安。”温有方道：“现下银子越欠越多，你兄弟的手气更越来越旺，我哥儿却越来越霉，这样下去，也不知何年何月才能还你。这么一笔债背在身上，做人也没有味儿。”韦小宝笑道：“欠债不还，那是理所当然之事，两位以后提也休提。” 温有方叹了口气，道：“小兄弟的为人，那是没得说的了，老实不客气说，咱哥儿的债倘若是欠你小兄弟的，便欠一百年不还也不打紧，是不是？”韦小宝笑道：“正是，正是，便欠二百年、三百年却又如何？” 温有方道：“二三百年吗？大伙儿都没这个命了。”说到这里，转头向兄长望去。温有道点了点头。温有方续道：“可是咱哥儿知道，你小兄弟的那位主儿，却厉害得紧。”韦小宝道：“你说海老公？”温有方道：“可不是吗？你小兄弟不追，海老公总有一天不能放过咱兄弟。他老人家伸一根手指，温家老大、老二便吃不了要兜着走啦。因此咱们得想一个法子，怎生还这笔银子才好？” 韦小宝心道：“来了，来了，海老公这老乌龟果然是料事如神。这些日子来我只记着练拳，跟小玄子比武，可把去上书房偷书的事给忘了。我且不提，听他们有何话说。”当下嗯了一声，不置可否。 温有方道：“我们想来想去，只有一个法子，求你小兄弟大度包容，免了我们这笔债，别向海老公提起。以后咱哥儿赢了回来，自然如数奉还，不会拖欠分文。” 韦小宝心头暗骂：“你奶奶的，你两只臭乌龟当我韦小宝是大羊牯？凭你这两只王八蛋的本事，跟老子赌钱还有赢回来的日子？”当下面有难色，说道：“可是我已经向海公公说了。他老人家说，这笔银子嘛，还总是要还的，迟些日子倒不妨。” 温氏兄弟对望了一眼，神色甚是尴尬，他二人显然对海老公十分忌惮。温有道道：“那么小兄弟可不可帮这样一个忙？以后你赢了钱，拿去交给海老公，便说……便说是我们还你的。”韦小宝心中又在暗骂：“越说越不成话了，真当我是三岁小孩儿么？”说道：“这样虽然也不是不行，不过我……我可未免太吃亏了些。” 温氏兄弟听他口气松动，登时满面堆欢，一齐拱手，道：“承情，承情，多多帮忙。”温有方道：“小兄弟的好处，我哥儿俩今生今世，永不敢忘。”韦小宝道：“倘若这么办，我要二位大哥办一件事，不知成不成？”二人没口子的答应：“成，成，什么事都成。” 韦小宝道：“我在宫里这许多日子，可连皇上的脸也没有见过。你二位在上书房服侍皇上，我想请二位带我去见见皇上。” 温氏兄弟登时面面相觑，大有难色。温有道连连搔头。温有方说道：“唉，这个……这个……这个……”连说了七八个“这个”，再也接不下去。 韦小宝道：“我又不想对皇上奏什么事，只不过到上书房去耽上一会儿，能见到皇上的金面，那是咱们做奴才的福气，要是没福见到，也不能怪你二位啊。” 温有道忙道：“这个倒办得到。今日申牌时分，我到你那儿来，便带你去上书房。那个时候，皇上总是在书房里做诗写字，你多半能见到。别的时候皇上在殿上办事，那便不易见着了。”说着斜头向温有方霎了霎眼睛。 韦小宝瞧在眼里，心中又是“臭乌龟、贱王八”的乱骂一阵，寻思：“这两只臭乌龟听说我要见皇帝，脸色就难看得很。他们说申牌时分皇帝一定在上书房，其实是一定不在上书房。他们不敢让我见皇帝，我几时又想见了？他奶奶的，皇帝倘若问我什么话，老子又怎回答得出？一露出马脚，那还不满门抄斩？说不定连老子的妈也要从扬州给拉来杀头。海老乌龟教我武功，也不知教得对不对，为什么打来打去，总是打不过小玄子？我去把那部不知是《三十二章经》还是《四十二章经》从上书房偷了出来，给了海老乌龟，他心里一喜欢，说不定便有真功夫教我了。”当下便向温氏兄弟拱手道谢，道：“咱们做奴才的，连万岁爷的金面也见不着，死了定给阎王老子大骂乌龟王八蛋。” 他去和小玄子比武之后，回到屋里，只和海老公说些比武的情形，温氏兄弟答允带他去上书房之事却一句不提，心想待我将那部经书偷来，好教海老乌龟大大惊喜一场。
未牌过后，温氏兄弟果然到来。温有方轻轻吹了声口哨，韦小宝便溜了出去。温氏兄弟打个手势，也不说话，向西便行。韦小宝跟在后面，有了上次的经历，他一路上留心穿廊过户时房舍的形状，以免回来时迷失道路。 从他住屋去上书房，比之去赌钱的所在更远，几乎走了一盏茶时分。温有道才轻声道：“上书房到了，一切小心些！”韦小宝道：“我理会得。” 两人带着他绕到后院，从旁边一扇小门中挨身而进，再穿过两座小小的花园，走进一间大房间中。 但见房中一排排都是书架，架上都摆满了书，也不知有几千几万本。韦小宝倒抽了口凉气，暗叫：“辣块妈妈不开花，开花养了小娃娃！他奶奶的，皇帝屋里摆了这许多书，整天见的都是书，朝也书（输），晚也书（输），还能赌钱么？海老公要的这几本书，我可到哪里找去？”他生长市井，一生之中从来没见过书房是什么样子，只道房中放得七八本书，就是书房了。从七八本书中，检一本写有“三十二”或“四十二”几个字的书，想必不难，此刻眼前突然出现了千卷万卷书籍，登时眼花缭乱，不由得手足无措，便想转身逃走。 温有道低声道：“再过一会，皇上便进书房来了，坐在这张桌边读书写字。” 韦小宝见那张紫檀木的书桌极大，桌面金镶玉嵌，心想：“桌上镶的黄金白玉，一定不是假货，挖了下来拿去珠宝店，倒有不少银子好卖。”见桌上摊着一本书，左首放着的砚台笔筒也都雕刻精致。椅子上披了锦缎，绣着一条金龙。韦小宝见了这等气派，心中不禁怦怦乱跳，寻思：“他奶奶的，这乌龟皇帝倒会享福！”书桌右首是一只青铜古鼎，烧着檀香，鼎盖的兽头口中袅袅吐出一缕缕青烟。 温有道道：“你躲在书架后面，悄悄见一见皇上，那就是了。皇上读书写字的时候，不许旁人出声，你可不得咳嗽打喷嚏。否则皇上一怒，说不定便叫侍卫将你拖出去斩首。”韦小宝道：“我自然知道，不能咳嗽打喷嚏，更加不得放响屁。”温有道脸一沉，道：“小兄弟，上书房不比别的地方，可不能说不恭不敬的胡话。”韦小宝伸了伸舌头，不敢说了。 只见他两兄弟一个拿起拂尘，一个拿了抹布，到处拂扫抹拭。书房中本就清洁异常，一尘不染，但他二人还是细心收拾。温氏兄弟抹了灰尘后，各人从一只柜子中取出一块雪白的白布，再在各处揩抹，揩抹一会，拿起白布来瞧瞧，看白布上有无黑迹，真比抹镜子还要细心，直抹了大半天，这才歇手。 温有道说道：“小兄弟，皇上这会儿还不来书房，今天是不来啦。耽会侍卫大人便要来巡查，见到你这张生面孔，定要查究，大伙儿可吃罪不起。”韦小宝道：“你们先去，我再等一会就走。”温氏兄弟齐声道：“那不成！”温有道说道：“宫里的规矩，你也不是不知道，皇上所到的地方，该当由谁侍候，半分也乱不得。宫里太监宫女几千人，倘若哪一个想见皇上，便自行走到皇上跟前，那还成体统吗？”温有方道：“好兄弟，不是咱哥儿不肯帮忙，咱二人能够进上书房，每天也只有这半个时辰，打扫揩抹过后，立刻便须出去。不瞒你说，别说你不能在上书房里多耽，便是咱哥儿俩，过了时不出去，给侍卫大人们查到了，那也是重则抄家杀头
When he walked to the door, he heard Old Man Hai coughing, and asked, "Eunuch, are you better?" Old Man Hai said in a deep voice, "Okay, you bastard! Come in!" Wei Xiaobao went into the room, only to see Mr. Hai sitting on the chair, the collapsed table had been replaced with another one.Hai Laogong asked: "How much did you win?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I won more than ten taels of silver, but...but..." Hai Laogong said: "But what?" Wei Xiaobao said: "But I lent it to Lao Wu." Actually He won more than twenty taels, and besides lending it to Old Wu, he still had eight or nine taels left over. He was afraid that Mr. Hai would ask him to hand it over, and he would inevitably make inaccurate reports. Hai Laogong's face darkened, and he said: "What's the use of lending to Old Wu? He doesn't go to the study. Why don't you lend it to the Wen brothers?" Wei Xiaobao didn't know the reason, and said: "The Wen brothers didn't ask I'll borrow it." Hai Laogong said: "I didn't borrow it from you, wouldn't you think of a way to lend it to him? Have you forgotten what I told you?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I...I killed this kid last night, I was so scared that I forgot everything. I want to lend it to Brother Wen, yes, yes, your old man has indeed ordered it." Mr. Hai snorted, and said: "Kill a lot of people. What's the big deal? But you're young, so it's no wonder you haven't killed anyone. You haven't forgotten that book?" Wei Xiaobao said: "That book... ...Book...I...I..." Mr. Hai snorted again, and said: "Really forget everything?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Elder-in-law, I...I have a headache, I'm afraid...it's terrible, you Coughing like this again, I'm really worried, what... everything is confused." Hai Laogong said: "Okay, come here!" Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes!" and walked a few steps closer.Mr. Hai said: "I'll say it again, if you don't remember again, I'll kill you." Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes, yes." He thought: "Just say it again, and I won't forget it in a hundred years." Mr. Hai said: "Go and win the money from Wen's brothers. If they lose, lend them the money. The more you borrow, the better. After a few days, you will ask them to take you to the upper study. They owe you money." You don't dare to refuse your money, if you push back, you say I will settle the score with Wu Laogong, the head of the study. If the brothers of the Wen family don't pay the money, they will take advantage of the emperor's absence..." Wei Xiaobao said: "The emperor?" Hailao Gongdao: "What?" Wei Xiaobao said: "No...it's nothing." Mr. Hai said: "They will ask you what you are doing in the study, and you just say that people look forward to high places and look forward to seeing the emperor, so you can work in the study. Wen Wen My brother will not let you see the emperor, and when he takes you there, the emperor will definitely not be in the study, so you have to try to steal a book." Hearing him mentioning the emperor one after another, Wei Xiaobao thought: "Could this be the imperial palace? Isn't it a big brothel in Beijing? Oh, hey, yes, yes, if it weren't for the imperial palace, how could there be such a grandeur? They are eunuchs who serve the emperor." Although Wei Xiaobao had heard about the emperor, empress, prince, princess, court ladies, and eunuchs, he only knew that the emperor must wear dragon robes, and he didn't know what the rest of them looked like.He had watched a lot of white operas in Yangzhou, but the eunuchs on the stage were completely different from Mr. Hai and Old Wu in their costumes. A nice sentence.He spends a day with Mr. Hai, and gambles with Old Wu and Wen's brothers for a long time, but he doesn't know that they are eunuchs. Now he heard Mr. Hai say this, and then he gradually realized, and thought: "Ah, in this way, Haven't I become a little eunuch?" Hai Laogong sternly said: "Do you understand?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes, yes, I understand, I want to go to the Emperor... the Emperor's study." Hai Laogong said: "What are you doing in the Emperor's study? Are you going to play?" Wei Xiaobao said: "To steal a book." Hai Laogong said: "Steal what book?" Wei Xiaobao said: "This... this... what book... I... I can't remember." Hai Laogong said: " Let me say it again, remember it well. It is a Buddhist scripture called "Forty-Two Chapters". What's it called?" Wei Xiaobao said happily, "It's called the Forty-Two Chapters." Mr. Hai heard the joy in his words, and asked, "What's the fun?" Wei Xiaobao said, "As soon as you mention it, I will I remember, so happy." It turned out that he heard Mr. Hai said that he wanted him to go to the upper study room to "steal books". "Stealing" is not difficult, but "books" are difficult for people.He can't read a load of watermelon-sized characters, and he can't tell what book it is, but he can't do it even if he kills his head, until he hears that the title of the book is "Forty-two Chapters".I couldn't help being elated, I don't know what the "Zhang Jing" is, but I know the three characters "forty-two", and I know three of the five characters, I can't help being very proud. Hai Laogong said again: "Stealing books in the upper study room, your hands and feet must be clean and neat. If people see you, you will lose a hundred lives." Wei Xiaobao said: "I understand this, stealing things for others I caught it, is there still a good show to sing?" With an idea, he said: "But I will never invite your father-in-law out." Mr. Hai sighed: "It doesn't matter whether you recruit me or not." Coughed for a while , said: "You did a good job today, and you actually won money. Didn't they become suspicious?" Wei Xiaobao smiled and said: "Hehe, no, how could it be?" Wanting to praise himself, he finally restrained himself.Hai Laogong said: "Don't be lazy, if you have nothing to do, practice more." Wei Xiaobao agreed, and walked into the room, he saw bowls and chopsticks, four dishes and one soup on the table, no one had touched it, he hurriedly said: "Eunuch, you don't want to eat? I'll pack it for you." Hai Laogong said: "No Hungry, don’t eat, you can eat it yourself.” Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, he didn't have time to pack the rice, so he picked up a piece of braised pork and ate it. Although the dish was already cold and he swallowed it, it was indescribably delicious. He thought: "I don't know who brought these meals. Don't worry about such trivial things Ask more, keep your eyes open, and you will know slowly.” Then he thought: “If this is really the imperial palace, then Old Wu, Brother Wen, and that little Xuanzi are all eunuchs. How do you look like the empress? You have to see it clearly. Back in Yangzhou, hehe, I’m so arrogant when I say this. I don’t know if Brother Mao can escape from the palace? I didn’t hear them talking about taking money while gambling Most of the people living here escaped." After the meal, fearing that Mr. Hai would become suspicious, he took six dice and tossed them in the bowl endlessly. After tossing for a while, he felt his eyelids getting heavy. He hadn't slept all night last night, and he was so tired now. Very soon, he fell asleep soon.
This sleep lasted until evening, and then a rough eunuch brought food. Wei Xiaobao served Mr. Hai to eat a bowl of rice, and then helped him go to bed. He slept on the small bed, thinking: "Tomorrow, the most important thing is to compete with Xiao Xuanzi. We must win him." Close your eyes, think back Mao Shiba couldn't remember the way he fought the Manchurian warriors in the tavern, but he couldn't remember clearly, and he couldn't help feeling a little regretful: "Brother Mao wanted to teach me martial arts, but I refused to learn. If I learn along the way, little Xuanzi Even though he is stronger than me, how can he be my opponent? If he rides again tomorrow, he won't be able to turn over. It doesn't matter if he loses money. Such a big loss of face, I, the 'little white dragon' Wei Xiaobao, can't do it in the arena. Don't mess around." Suddenly I thought: "Manchurian warriors can't beat Brother Mao, and Brother Mao is no match for the old tortoise, why don't you trick the old tortoise to teach me some skills?" Immediately he said: "Elder-in-law, you want me to go to the study to get some books. There is a difficulty in the middle." Mr. Hai said: "What's the problem?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Today when I came back from gambling, I met a... little eunuch who blocked the way and asked me to give him the money. If I refused, he would fight with me. He said that I beat him, so he let me go. I fought with him for a long time, so... so I couldn't even come back to eat in time." Hai Laogong said: "You lost, didn't you?" Wei Xiaobao said: "He is tall He is strong and strong, much stronger than me. He said he wants to compete with me every day, and when I win against him, he will not come to pester me." Hai Laogong said: "What's the name of this little baby? Which room is it from? " Wei Xiaobao said: "His name is Xiaoxuanzi, but I don't know which room he is from." Hai Laogong said: "It must be that you won the money, and you are so arrogant and annoying, otherwise others would not find you." Wei Xiaobao said: "I am not convinced, if I fight against him tomorrow, I don't know if I can win. "Old Man Hai snorted, and said: "You're thinking of asking me to teach you martial arts again. I told you not to teach it, and if you don't teach it, it's useless for you to go around again." Wei Xiaobao was startled inwardly: "Old turtle is smart, don't fall for this." He said: "This little Xuanzi doesn't know martial arts, I want to beat him. I don't need to learn any martial arts, who wants you to teach me? Today I am clearly Riding on him, it’s just that he has great strength and turned over. Tomorrow I will try to lift him up, and this guy may not be able to turn over like a turtle.” He had already restrained himself this day and did not say a word of foul language, and finally couldn’t help but say said a word. Hai Laogong said: "If you think he can't turn over, that's easy." Wei Xiaobao said: "I don't think there is any difficulty, I will lift his shoulders firmly tomorrow." Hai Laogong said: "Hmph, what's the use of lifting his shoulders? Whether you can turn over depends entirely on the strength in your waist, and you have to put your knees against the acupuncture points in his back. Come here, and I'll show you." Wei Xiaobao jumped off the bed, walked to his bed, Mr. Hai felt a spot on his lower back, pressed lightly, Wei Xiaobao felt sore and weak all over.Hai Laogong said: "Do you remember?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Yes, I will try it tomorrow, I don't know if it will work or not?" Hai Laogong said angrily: "What will it work? It is a hundred-shot-and-one-shot-and-one-shot." He stretched out his hands and pressed lightly on both sides of his head and neck.Wei Xiaobao yelled "Ah", he felt his chest was suffocated and he couldn't breathe.Hai Laogong said: "If you use your strength to attack his two acupoints, he won't have the strength to fight you." Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, and said: "It's done, I will definitely beat him tomorrow." The word "quasi" was learned during daytime gambling.Going back to bed and falling asleep, thinking of the tomorrow when "Little White Dragon" Wei Xiaobao beat Xiao Xuanzi and shouted "Surrender", he was very proud.
The next day, Old Wu came to ask him to gamble.One of the Wen family brothers was named Wen Youdao and the other was named Wen Youfang. When it was the turn of the two brothers to be dealers, Wei Xiaobao resorted to tricks and won them over twenty taels of silver.The two brothers were unlucky, within half an hour, the fifty taels of money had been lost.Wei Xiaobao lent them twenty taels of silver, and when the betting stopped, the Wen family brothers lost the twenty taels of silver again. All Wei Xiaobao remembered was the martial arts contest with Xiao Xuanzi, once the game was over, he ran to that room.There were still many plates of snacks on the table, he took a few pieces to eat, he heard the sound of boots, he was afraid that it wasn't Xiaoxuanzi who came, he wanted to get under the table first, but he heard Xiaoxuanzi outside the door Shouted: "Xiao Guizi, Xiao Guizi!" Wei Xiaobao jumped to the door, and said with a smile: "Date, see you or leave." Xiao Xuanzi also laughed: "Haha, date, see you or leave." Walk into the room.Wei Xiaobao saw that his new clothes were very gorgeous, he couldn't help but feel jealous, thought: "I will tear your new clothes later, I will make you feel unimpressed!" With a loud cry, he rushed towards him. Xiao Xuanzi shouted: "Good time." He twisted his arms and swept his left foot across.Wei Xiaobao couldn't stand upright, swayed a few times, then fell down, pulling Xiaoxuanzi to the ground as well. Wei Xiaobao rolled over, turned over and pressed on Xiaoxuanzi's back, remembering what Hai Laogong taught, he reached out to grab the acupoints on his back, but he has never practiced the kung fu of hitting the acupoints, how can he easily grasp the acupoints?The part he held was slightly off, Xiao Xuanzi had already turned over, grabbed his left arm, and twisted it backwards forcefully.Wei Xiaobao exclaimed: "Ah, you are shameless, are you trying to bend someone's arm?" Xiao Xuanzi laughed and said, "Learning to wrestle is learning to bend someone's arm, why are you shameless?" He slammed into his lower back hard, hit his vest on his head, passed his right hand through his armpit, and threw it upwards vigorously.Xiao Xuanzi's body flew over his head, and fell to the ground with a slap. Xiao Xuanzi turned over and jumped up, said: "So you also know how to do the 'Antelope Hanging Horns'." Wei Xiaobao didn't know what the "Antelope Hanging Horns" technique was, so he won the move by mistake, very proud, and said: " What is this 'antelope hanging horn', I still have a lot of powerful tricks I haven't used yet." Xiao Xuanzi said happily: "That can't be better, let's do some tricks again." Wei Xiaobao thought to himself: "So you have learned martial arts, no wonder you can't beat you. But if you make a move, I will learn a move, at most I will give you a few more blows, I can always learn your tricks." Seeing Xiaoxuanzi again When he rushed over, he also rushed forward.Unexpectedly, Xiaoxuanzi's pounce was fake, when Wei Xiaobao pounced, he had already stopped his momentum, stepped aside, stretched out his hand to push him on the back.Wei Xiaobao rushed to nothing, he couldn't stop his feet already, he pushed him smoothly, and immediately fell down heavily with a bang. Xiao Xuanzi cheered loudly, jumped over and rode on his back, and shouted, "Surrender or not?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Don't surrender!" He wanted to straighten his waist and turn over, suddenly his waist felt numb, and the two acupoints on the back of his waist were pressed by Xiaoxuanzi's fingers, that was exactly the technique that Old Man Hai taught him last night, even though he Learned it, but let the opponent use it first.Wei Xiaobao struggled a few times, but still couldn't break free, so he could only shout: "Okay, let me down once!" Xiao Xuanzi laughed out loud and let him get up.Wei Xiaobao suddenly stretched out his foot and tripped, Xiao Xuanzi leaned over and wanted to fall, Wei Xiaobao punched him right in the middle.Xiaoxuanzi groaned in pain, bent down, Wei Xiaobao jumped up from behind, wrapping his arms around his head and neck.Xiao Xuanzi was dizzy for a while, and fell to the ground.Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, he clasped his hands tightly and asked, "Surrender or not?" Xiao Xuanzi snorted, and suddenly his ribs slammed backwards.Wei Xiaobao's chest and ribs were so painful that he wanted to break them, he yelled, and fell on his back.Xiao Xuanzi turned over and sat on his chest, this time he won again, but he was out of breath, and he was so tired that he couldn't catch his breath, he asked: "Admitted...Admitted...Are you acquiesced?" Wei Xiaobao said: " Don't...don't...convince, one hundred...one...ten thousand are not convinced. You just happened to win." Xiao Xuanzi said: "If you don't accept it, then...you get up and fight." Wei Xiaobao Putting his hands on the ground, he just wanted to bounce hard, but the opponent's vital parts of his chest were pinned down, and he couldn't use any strength. After a long stalemate, he had to surrender again. Xiao Xuanzi stood up, but felt his arms go limp.Wei Xiaobao tried his best to stand up, swaying his body, and said: "Tomorrow...tomorrow, I will fight again, and I must...have to ask you to surrender." Xiao Xuanzi laughed: "If you fight a hundred times again, you will... also ... is also a loser, you have the guts to fight again tomorrow." Wei Xiaobao said: "I'm afraid you don't have the guts, why don't I have the guts? Dead date, see or leave." Xiao Xuanzi said: "Okay, dead date, Be there or leave." The two got into a fight and didn't mention the money betting.Since Xiaoxuanzi didn't mention it, Wei Xiaobao happily pretended to forget, if he won, the silver would naturally be necessary.
Wei Xiaobao returned to the house, and said to Mr. Hai: "Elder-in-law, your method doesn't work, it's too common." Mr. Hai snorted, and said, "It's worthless, and I lost again." Wei Xiaobao said: "If you use me Although your own method is not necessarily sure to win, it is not necessarily sure to lose. But your method is too pusty, and others know it too. What's so strange?" Mr. Hai wondered: "He also knows this method? Give it a try. Look." Wei Xiaobao thought to himself: "You are blind, let me show you, can you see?" Suddenly he thought: "I don't know if he is really blind or not, I have to try him." He bumped back and said: "He bumped like this, and only hit three thousand bones in my whole body, and every one of them hurts." Mr. Hai sighed, and said, "How can I see this bump? ?" Standing up tremblingly, he said, "Try to imitate him." Wei Xiaobao secretly rejoiced: "The old turtle is really blind." With the vest facing him, he thrust his elbows and slowly slammed back, saying : "He hit me like this with his elbow." When his elbow touched Hai Laogong's chest, he stopped exerting force. Mr. Hai hummed, and said: "This is an 'armpit hammer', that's nothing." Wei Xiaobao said, "There's more." He took Mr. Hai's left hand, put it on his right shoulder, and said, "He With a strong shake, I flew over his head." This move was actually his triumph of throwing Xiao Xuanzi down, and he deliberately turned it upside down to say that he wanted to test Mr. Hai.Hai Laogong said: "This is 'Antelope Hanging Horn'." Wei Xiaobao said: "So you already knew about it." Then he took his arm and turned it slowly.Hai Laogong said: "Well, this is the third hand in 'Double Plum'. What else?" Wei Xiaobao said: "It turns out that Xiaoxuanzi's tricks are well-known. I messed with him, and those tricks must have a few nice tricks. I rushed towards him, but this kid moved aside, but Push me on my back, and I will..." Mr. Hai didn't wait for him to finish, and asked: "Where did he push you?" Wei Xiaobao said: "When he pushed me, I fell to the ground, how can I still do it? Remember where to push it." Hai Laogong said: "Remember to see, is it pushed here?" He stretched out his hand to press the back of his left shoulder.Wei Xiaobao said: "No." Hai Laogong said: "Is it here?" He pressed the back of his right shoulder.Wei Xiaobao still said: "No." Mr. Hai even pressed six or seven parts, but Wei Xiaobao said no.Hai Laogong stretched out his palm and pressed under his right waist and ribs, and asked: "Is it here?" He said and pushed lightly.Wei Xiaobao staggered, fell a few steps, and immediately remembered the place where Xiao Xuanzi pushed him, and said loudly: "Yes, that's right, it's right here. Father-in-law, how do you know?" Mr. Hai didn't answer, but pondered for a while, and said: "I taught you the two methods, and you said he can do it, is this true?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Of course it is true. Not only will it press my lower back, but it will also lift my chest. I couldn't breathe immediately, so I had to surrender for a while. This is called..." Mr. Hai ignored his name, stretched out his hand, and said, "Where is he pressing on your chest?" Wei Xiaobao took his hand and pressed it on his chest, where Xiao Xuanzi restrained him just now, and said: " Here." Mr. Hai sighed, and said: "This is the 'Purple Palace Point', this child's master is a high-ranking person." Wei Xiaobao said: "That's nothing, a man can bend and stretch, and keep the green hills, so he doesn't have to worry about running out of firewood." (During the rush, he changed "not afraid of running out of firewood" into "not afraid of running out of firewood".) I... I, Wei... ...My little Guizi lost a battle today, so it's not too difficult to win him back tomorrow." Mr. Hai went back to the chair, flexed and stretched the five fingers of his right hand, stretched and bent, closed his eyes and meditated, after a while, he said: "He can 'little grasping hand', that's nothing, but his palm pushed On the 'Yishe point' on your right waist, this is the Wudang school's 'Mianzhang' technique. Later, he presses your 'Jinshuo point', and then presses your 'Zigong point', which is the Wudang school's acupuncture technique. It turns out that there is a Wudang master hidden in our palace. Well, very good, very good! How old do you think that little... Xiao Xuanzi is?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Much older than me." Hai Laogong said: "How old is older?" Wei Xiaobao said: "How old." Hai Laogong said angrily: "How old is what? How old is one or two years older, eight How old is nine years old? If he is eight or nine years older than you, what are you going to do with him?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Okay, let's say he is only a year or two older than me, but he is much taller than me." OK The opponent is old and tall, so it is not too embarrassing to lose, if it is not for Mr. Hai to teach martial arts, he will definitely not talk about the defeat in the competition. Hai Laogong pondered: "This kid is fourteen or fifteen years old, um, how long did it take you to fight him before you lost?" Wei Xiaobao said: "At least it took two or three hours." Hai Laogong's face sank, and he shouted: "Don't Bragging! How long is it?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Even if it's not an hour, it's more than half an hour." Mr. Hai snorted, and said: "I'll ask you, so you can tell me well. This man has learned martial arts. You haven't learned However, losing is not ashamed. In a fight, it doesn't matter if you lose ten times or eight times. Even if you lose a hundred times or two hundred times, you are still young, so what are you afraid of? As long as you win the last time, you can win the opponent again. I don’t dare to fight with you, that’s a hero.” Wei Xiaobao said: “Yes! In the past, Han Gaozu was defeated in every battle, but the last time he beat the King of Chu to hang himself in the Wujiang River...” Hai Laogong said: “What is the Wujiang River hanged? Wujiang slays himself." Wei Xiaobao said: "Whether you hang yourself or slay yourself, you lose and kill yourself." Hai Laogong said: "You always have something to say. Let me ask you, how many times did you lose in the fight with Xiaoxuanzi today?" Wei Xiaobao said: "It's only once or twice, two or three times." Hai Laogong said: "It's four times , isn’t it?” Wei Xiaobao said: “The ones who really lost were only two times, and the other two times he was foolish, so I don’t count myself as losers.” Hai Laogong said: "How often do you beat each time?" Wei Xiaobao said: "I can't count the time, sometimes it looks like defecating, sometimes it looks like urinating." Hai Laogong said: "Nonsense! What sometimes looks like defecating and sometimes looks like urinating?" Wei Xiaobao said: "Poop slowly, and it won't take long to pee." Mr. Hai smiled slightly, and said: "Although this boy's metaphor is vulgar, it makes sense." After thinking for a while, he said: "You have never learned martial arts, this little Xuanzi has to hang around you for a while before he knocks you down. This 'small grasping hand' kung fu is new, you don't have to be afraid. I will teach you the 'big grasping hand' all the way, you should remember it well, and fight him tomorrow." Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, and said: "He used Small grapplers, let's use the big grapplers to overwhelm the small ones, and we will surely win." Hai Laogong said: "That's not necessarily the case. The big and small grapplers have their own strengths, it depends on who can practice well. If he can practice well You, the small grappling hand is better than the big grappling hand. The big grappling hand has 18 moves in total, each of which has seven or eight changes, and you can’t remember them all at once, so learn one or two moves first and then talk about it.” Immediately stood up Come on, put on a posture, perform it again, and said: "This trick is called 'Crane Combing Ling'. You have practiced it first, and I will dismantle it." Wei Xiaobao remembered it after reading it once. After practicing it seven or eight times, he thought he was very proficient, and said, "You're good at it!" Hai Laogong sat on the chair, stretched out his left arm, and grabbed his shoulder, Wei Xiaobao stretched out his hand to block, but was a step slower, he had already grabbed his shoulder.Hai Laogong said: "What are you familiar with? Practice again." Wei Xiaobao practiced a few more times, and then split the trick with Mr. Hai.Hai Laogong stretched out his left arm, his posture and moves were still exactly the same as before.Wei Xiaobao had been prepared for a long time, he stretched out his hand to block as soon as he moved his hand, but he was still a little slow, and he still grabbed his shoulder.Old Man Hai snorted, and cursed: "Little idiot!" Wei Xiaobao cursed in his heart: "Old turtle!" Confused, I don't know why. Mr. Hai said: "If I catch you, you will practice for three more years, and you won't be able to avoid it. Let me tell you, you can't avoid it. If I grab your shoulder, you have to cut my wrist with your palm. Offense is defense." Wei Xiaobao was overjoyed, and said: "So that's how it is, it's so easy! If you said it earlier, I would have done it long ago." After Hai Laogong grabbed it with his left hand, Wei Xiaobao sent out his right palm to cut his wrist, unexpectedly Hai Laogong didn't shrink back , the palm turned slightly, and with a slap, he slapped him hard.Wei Xiaobao was furious, and also slapped him. Hai Laogong flipped his left palm, grabbed his wrist, swung him out of the way, and said with a smile: "Little idiot, do you remember?" He fell down and hit the wall with his shoulder, fortunately Mr. Hai's shot was very light, otherwise his shoulder would have been broken. Wei Xiaobao was furious, the word "old turtle" just came to his mouth, he finally stopped it in time, and then he thought: "These two moves are very good, tomorrow I will compete with Xiaoxuanzi, so I will use the **** to make sure Xiaoxuanzi Xuanzi can't resist it." Immediately he got up, thought about these two tricks of Old Man Hai, kept them in mind, and then went to the audition again. After trying more than ten times, Mr. Hai's mysterious and inscrutable technique no longer felt too strange to his eyes, and he finally practiced to the point where he could no longer catch him, but he still couldn't avoid that slap. It's just that Mr. Hai didn't use as much force as he did the first time. A light swipe of his finger on his face was considered a slap. Although this slap didn't hurt, it always hit him every time.Wei Xiaobao didn't hit back, and Mr. Hai didn't catch him and throw him away. Wei Xiaobao was frustrated, and asked: "Grandpa, how can you avoid this attack?" Hai Laogong smiled slightly and said: "If I want to hit you, you won't be able to avoid it even if you practice for ten years, but Xiaoxuanzi I can't hit you either. Let's practice the second move." Standing up, he tried out the second move of the big grabbing hand "ape picking fruit", and dismantled it with him in the same way. Wei Xiaobao is very lazy by nature, originally he would never put his heart into learning kung fu, but he has a strong desire to be competitive, he only wants to learn a few clever moves, forcing Xiao Xuanzi to yell for surrender, so he puts his heart into learning moves.Mr. Hai was actually not bored either.From noon to evening that day, the two kept dismantling their techniques.Hai Laogong was sitting on the chair, his arms seemed to be able to expand and contract at will, as long as he moved casually, Wei Xiaobao got hit on his body, finally his strikes were very light, and he didn't use any force in every move.But even so, Wei Xiaobao slept on the bed that night, he felt pain all over his body from head to legs, during most of the day, he suffered at least four to five hundred blows.他躺在床上，只是暗骂：“老乌龟，打了老子这么多下。明日老子打赢了小玄子，老乌龟，你就向我磕三百个响头，老子也决不跟你学功夫了。”
次日上午，韦小宝赌完钱后，便去跟小玄子比武，眼见他又换了件新衣，心道：“你这小子，天天穿新衣，你上院子嫖姑娘吗？”妒意大盛，上手便撕他衣服，嗤的一声响，将他衣襟撕了一条大缝，这一来，可忘了新学的手法，给小玄子一拳打在腰里，痛得哇哇大叫。小玄子乘机伸指戳出，戳中他左腿。韦小宝左腿酸麻，跪了下来，给小玄子在后一推，立时伏倒。小玄子纵身骑在他背上，又制住了他“意舍穴”，韦小宝只得投降。 他站起身来，凝了凝神，待得小玄子扑将过来，便即使出那招“仙鹤梳翎”，去切对方手腕。小玄子急忙缩手，伸拳欲打，这一招已给韦小宝料到，一把抓住他手腕，扭了过来，跟着以左肘在他背心急撞，小玄子大叫一声，痛得无力反抗，这一回合却是韦小宝胜了。 两人比武以来，韦小宝首次得胜，心中喜悦不可言喻。他虽在扬州得胜山下杀过一名军官，在宫中又杀过小桂子，但两次均是使诈。他生平和人打架，除了欺侮八九岁的小孩子战无不胜之外，和大人打架，向来必输，偶然占一两次上风，也必是出到用口咬、撒泥沙等等卑鄙手段。至于在小饭店桌子底下用刀剁人脚板，其无甚光彩之处，也不待人言而后知。以真本事获胜，这一役实是生平第一次。他一得意，不免心浮气粗，第三回合却又输了。 第四回合上韦小宝留了神，使出那招“猿猴摘果”，和对方扭打良久，竟然僵持不下，到后来两人都没了力气，搂住了一团，不停喘气，只得罢斗。 小玄子甚喜，笑道：“你今天……今天的本事长进了，跟你比武有些味道，是谁……谁教你了？”韦小宝也气喘吁吁的道：“这本事我……我早就有的，不过前两天没使出来，明儿我还有更……更加厉害的手段，你敢不敢领教？”小玄子哈哈大笑，说道：“自然要领教的，可别是大叫投降的手段。”韦小宝道：“呸，明天定要你大叫投降。”
韦小宝回到屋中，得意洋洋的道：“公公，你的大擒拿手果然使得，我扭住了那小子的手腕，再用手肘在他背上这么一撞，这小子只好认输。” 海老公问道：“今日你和他打了几个回合？”韦小宝道：“打了四场，各赢两场。本来我可以赢足三场，第三场太不小心。”海老公道：“你说话七折八扣，倘若打了四场，你最多只赢一场。”韦小宝笑了笑，说道：“第一场我没赢。第二场却的的确确是我赢了，若有虚言，天诛地灭。第三场他不算输。第四场打得大家没了气力，约定明天再打过。”海老公道：“你老老实实说给我听，一招一式，细细比来。” 韦小宝记心虽好，但毕竟于武术所知太少，这四场一招一式如何打法，却说不完全，他只记得第三场取胜的那一招得意之作。可是海老公偏要细问他如何落败。韦小宝只想含糊其辞的混了过去，最后总是给逼问到了真相。小玄子用以取胜的招式，海老公一一举出，便如亲见一般，比之韦小宝还说得详尽十倍。他这么一提，韦小宝便记得果是如此。 韦小宝道：“公公，你定有千里眼，否则小玄子那些手法，你怎能知道得清清楚楚？” 海老公低头沉思，喃喃道：“果真是武当高手，果真是武当高手。”韦小宝又惊又喜，道：“你说小玄子这小子是武当派高手？我能跟这高手斗得不分上下，哈哈……”海老公呸的一声，道：“别臭美啦！谁说是他了？我是说教他拳脚的师父。”韦小宝道：“那么你是什么派的？咱们这一派武功天下无敌，自然比武当派厉害得多，那也不用说啦。”他还不知海老公是何门派，便先大肆吹嘘。 海老公道：“我是少林派。”韦小宝大喜，道：“那好极了，武当派的武功一遇上咱们少林派，那是落花流水，夹着尾巴便逃。”海老公哼的一声，说道：“我又没收你做弟子，你怎么能算少林派？”韦小宝讪讪的道：“我又不说我是少林派，我学的是少林派武功，那总不错罢？”海老公道：“小玄子使的既是武当派正宗擒拿手，咱们便须以少林派正宗擒拿手法对付，否则就敌他不过。”韦小宝道：“是啊，我打输了事小，连累了咱们少林派的威名，却大大的不值得了。”少林派的威名到底有多大，他全然不知，但如自己跟少林派拉扯上一些干系，总不会是蚀本生意。 海老公道：“昨天我传你这两手大擒拿手，本意只想打得那小子知难而退，不再纠缠不清，你便可以去上书房拿书。可是眼前局面有点儿不同了，这小子果是武当派嫡系，这一十八路大擒拿手，便须一招一式的从头教起。你会不会弓箭步？”韦小宝道：“弓箭步吗，那当然是弯弓射箭时的姿式了。”海老公脸一沉，说道：“要学功夫，便得虚心，不会的就说不会。学武的人，最忌自作聪明，自以为是。前腿屈膝，其形如弓，称为'弓足'；后腿斜挺，其形如箭，称为'箭足'，两者合称，就叫做'弓箭步'。”说着摆了个“弓箭步”的姿式。韦小宝依样照做，说道：“这有什么难哪？我一天摆他个百儿八十的。” 海老公道：“我不要你摆百儿八十的，就只要你摆一个。你这么摆着，我不叫站起来，你可不许动。”说着摸他双腿姿式，要他前腿更曲，后腿更直。 韦小宝道：“那也挺容易呀。”可是这么摆着姿式不动，不到半炷香时分，双腿已酸麻之极，叫道：“这可行了罢？”海老公道：“还差得远呢。”韦小宝道：“我练这怪模样，又管什么用？难道还能将小玄子打倒么？”海老公道：“这'弓箭步'练得稳了，人家就推你不倒，用处大着呢。”韦小宝强辩：“就算人家推倒了我，我翻个身便站起来了，又不吃亏。”海老公缓缓点头，不去理他。 韦小宝见他点头，便挺直身子，拍了拍酸麻的双腿。海老公喝道：“谁叫你站直了？快摆'弓箭步'！”韦小宝道：“我要拉尿！”海老公喝道：“不准！”韦小宝道：“我要拉屎！”海老公道：“不准！”韦小宝道：“这可当真要拉出来啦！”海老公叹了口气，只得任由他上茅房，松散双腿。 韦小宝人虽聪明，但要他循规蹈矩，一板一眼的练功，却说什么也不干。海老公倒也不再勉强，只传了他几下擒拿扭打的手法。拆解之时，须得弯腰转身、蹲倒伏低，海老公却不跟他来这一套，只是出声指点，伸手一摸，便知他姿式手法是否有误。
次日韦小宝又去和小玄子比武，自忖昨天四场比赛，输了两场，赢了一场，今日多学了许多功夫，自非四场全胜不可。哪知一动手，几招新手法用到小玄子身上之时，竟然并不管用，或是给他以特异手法化解了开去，一上来两场连输。韦小宝又惊又怒，在第三场中小心翼翼，才拗住了小玄子的左掌向后力扳，小玄子翻不过来，只得认输。 韦小宝得意洋洋，第四场便又输了，给小玄子骑在头颈之中，双腿挟住了头颈，险些窒息。他投降之后，站起身来，骂道：“他妈的，你……” 小玄子脸一沉，喝道：“你说什么？”神色间登时有股凛然之威。韦小宝一惊，寻思：“不对，这里是皇宫，可不能说粗话。茅大哥说，到了北京，不能露出破绽，我说他妈的粗话，便露出了他妈的破绽，拆穿了西洋镜。”忙道：“我说我这一招'他妈的'式打你不过，只好投降。”小玄子脸露笑容，问道：“你这招手法叫做'他妈的'？那是什么意思？” 韦小宝心道：“还好，还好！这小乌龟整天在皇宫之中，不懂外边骂人的言语。”便胡诌道：“这式'蹋马蹄'本来是学马失前蹄，蹋了下去，教你不防，我就翻上来压住你。哪知你不上当，这'蹋马蹄'式便用不出了。” 小玄子哈哈大笑，道：“什么蹋马蹄，就是蹋牛蹄也赢不了我。明天还敢不敢再打？”韦小宝道：“那还用说，自然要打。喂，小玄子，我问你一句话，你可得老老实实，不能瞒我。”小玄子道：“什么话？”韦小宝道：“教你功夫的师父，是武当派高手，是不是？”小玄子奇道：“咦，你怎么知道？”韦小宝道：“我从你的手法之中看了出来。”小玄子道：“你懂得我的功夫？那叫什么名堂？”韦小宝道：“那还有不知道的？这是武当派嫡传正宗的'小擒拿手'，在江湖上也算是第一流的武功了，只不过遇到我少林派嫡传正宗的'大擒拿手'，你终于差了一级。” 小玄子哈哈大笑，说道：“大吹牛皮，也不害羞！今天比武，是你赢了还是我赢了？”韦小宝道：“胜败兵家常事，不以输赢论英雄。”小玄子笑道：“不以成败论英雄。”韦小宝道：“输赢就是成败。”他曾听说书先生说过“不以成败论英雄”的话，只是“成败”二字太难，一时想不起来，却给小玄子说了出来，不由得微感佩服：“你也不过比我大得一两岁，知道的事倒多。”
他回到屋中，叹了口气，道：“公公，我在学功夫，人家也在学，不过人家的师父本事大，教的法子好。”他不说自己不成，却赖海老公教法不佳。 海老公道：“今天定是四场全输了！浑小子不怪自己不中用，却来埋怨旁人。”韦小宝道：“呸！那怎么会四场全输？多少也得赢他这么一两场、两三场。我今天问过了，人家的师父的的确确是武当派嫡传正宗。”海老公道：“他认了吗？”语调中显得颇为兴奋。韦小宝道：“我问他：'教你功夫的师父，是武当派的高手，是不是？'他说：'咦，你怎么知道？'那不是认了？” 海老公喃喃的道：“所料不错，果然是武当派的。”随即呆呆出神，似在思索一件疑难之事，过了良久，道：“咱们来学几招勾脚的法子。” 如此韦小宝每天向海老公学招，跟小玄子比武。学招之时，凡是遇上难些的，韦小宝便敷衍含糊过去。海老公却也由他，撇开了扎根基的功夫，只是教他躲闪、逃避，以及诸般取巧、占便宜的法门。可是与小玄子相斗之时，他招式增加，小玄子的招式也相应增加，打来打去，十次中仍有七八次是韦小宝输了。
这些日子中，每日上午，韦小宝总是去和老吴、平威、温有道、温有方等太监赌钱。起初几日他用白布蒙脸，后来渐渐越蒙越少。众人虽见他和小桂子相貌完全不同，但一来赌得兴起，小桂子以前到底是怎生模样，心中也模模糊糊；二来他不住借钱于人，人人都爱交他这个朋友；三来他逐日少蒙白布，旁人慢慢的习以为常，居然无人相询。赌罢局散，他便去和小玄子比武，午饭后学习武功。 擒拿法越来越难，韦小宝已懒得记忆，更懒得练习，好在海老公倒也不如何逼迫督促，只是顺其自然。 时日匆匆，韦小宝来到皇宫不觉已有两个月，他每日里有钱可赌，日子过得虽不逍遥自在，却也快乐。只可惜不能污言秽语，肆意谩骂，又不敢在宫内偷鸡摸狗，撒赖使泼，未免美中不足。有时也想到该当逃出宫去，但北京城中一人不识，想想有些胆怯，便在宫中一天又一天的耽了下来。韦小宝和小玄子两个月斗了下来，日日见面，交情越来越好。韦小宝输得惯了，反正“不以输赢论英雄”，赌场上得意武场上输，倒也不放在心上。他和小玄子两人都觉得，只消有一日不打架比武，便浑身不得劲。韦小宝的武功进展缓慢，小玄子却也平平，韦小宝虽然输多赢少，却也决不是只输不赢。 这两个月赌了下来，温氏兄弟已欠了韦小宝二百多两银子。这一日还没赌完，两兄弟互相使个眼色，温有道向韦小宝道：“桂兄弟，咱们有件事商量，借一步说话。”韦小宝道：“好，要银子使吗？拿去不妨。”温有方道：“多谢了！”两兄弟走出门去，韦小宝跟着出去，三人到了隔壁的厢房。 温有道说道：“桂兄弟，你年纪轻轻，为人慷慨大方，当真难得。”韦小宝给他这么一奉承，登时心花怒放，说道：“哪里，哪里！自己哥儿们，你借我的，我借你的，那打什么紧！有借有还，上等之人！”这两个月下来，他已学了一口京片子，虽然偶尔露出几句扬州土话，在旁人听来，却也已不觉得如何刺耳。 温有道说道：“我哥儿俩这两个月来手气不好，欠下你的银子着实不少，你兄弟虽然不在乎，我二人心中却十分不安。”温有方道：“现下银子越欠越多，你兄弟的手气更越来越旺，我哥儿却越来越霉，这样下去，也不知何年何月才能还你。这么一笔债背在身上，做人也没有味儿。”韦小宝笑道：“欠债不还，那是理所当然之事，两位以后提也休提。” 温有方叹了口气，道：“小兄弟的为人，那是没得说的了，老实不客气说，咱哥儿的债倘若是欠你小兄弟的，便欠一百年不还也不打紧，是不是？”韦小宝笑道：“正是，正是，便欠二百年、三百年却又如何？” 温有方道：“二三百年吗？大伙儿都没这个命了。”说到这里，转头向兄长望去。温有道点了点头。温有方续道：“可是咱哥儿知道，你小兄弟的那位主儿，却厉害得紧。”韦小宝道：“你说海老公？”温有方道：“可不是吗？你小兄弟不追，海老公总有一天不能放过咱兄弟。他老人家伸一根手指，温家老大、老二便吃不了要兜着走啦。因此咱们得想一个法子，怎生还这笔银子才好？” 韦小宝心道：“来了，来了，海老公这老乌龟果然是料事如神。这些日子来我只记着练拳，跟小玄子比武，可把去上书房偷书的事给忘了。我且不提，听他们有何话说。”当下嗯了一声，不置可否。 温有方道：“我们想来想去，只有一个法子，求你小兄弟大度包容，免了我们这笔债，别向海老公提起。以后咱哥儿赢了回来，自然如数奉还，不会拖欠分文。” 韦小宝心头暗骂：“你奶奶的，你两只臭乌龟当我韦小宝是大羊牯？凭你这两只王八蛋的本事，跟老子赌钱还有赢回来的日子？”当下面有难色，说道：“可是我已经向海公公说了。他老人家说，这笔银子嘛，还总是要还的，迟些日子倒不妨。” 温氏兄弟对望了一眼，神色甚是尴尬，他二人显然对海老公十分忌惮。温有道道：“那么小兄弟可不可帮这样一个忙？以后你赢了钱，拿去交给海老公，便说……便说是我们还你的。”韦小宝心中又在暗骂：“越说越不成话了，真当我是三岁小孩儿么？”说道：“这样虽然也不是不行，不过我……我可未免太吃亏了些。” 温氏兄弟听他口气松动，登时满面堆欢，一齐拱手，道：“承情，承情，多多帮忙。”温有方道：“小兄弟的好处，我哥儿俩今生今世，永不敢忘。”韦小宝道：“倘若这么办，我要二位大哥办一件事，不知成不成？”二人没口子的答应：“成，成，什么事都成。” 韦小宝道：“我在宫里这许多日子，可连皇上的脸也没有见过。你二位在上书房服侍皇上，我想请二位带我去见见皇上。” 温氏兄弟登时面面相觑，大有难色。温有道连连搔头。温有方说道：“唉，这个……这个……这个……”连说了七八个“这个”，再也接不下去。 韦小宝道：“我又不想对皇上奏什么事，只不过到上书房去耽上一会儿，能见到皇上的金面，那是咱们做奴才的福气，要是没福见到，也不能怪你二位啊。” 温有道忙道：“这个倒办得到。今日申牌时分，我到你那儿来，便带你去上书房。那个时候，皇上总是在书房里做诗写字，你多半能见到。别的时候皇上在殿上办事，那便不易见着了。”说着斜头向温有方霎了霎眼睛。 韦小宝瞧在眼里，心中又是“臭乌龟、贱王八”的乱骂一阵，寻思：“这两只臭乌龟听说我要见皇帝，脸色就难看得很。他们说申牌时分皇帝一定在上书房，其实是一定不在上书房。他们不敢让我见皇帝，我几时又想见了？他奶奶的，皇帝倘若问我什么话，老子又怎回答得出？一露出马脚，那还不满门抄斩？说不定连老子的妈也要从扬州给拉来杀头。海老乌龟教我武功，也不知教得对不对，为什么打来打去，总是打不过小玄子？我去把那部不知是《三十二章经》还是《四十二章经》从上书房偷了出来，给了海老乌龟，他心里一喜欢，说不定便有真功夫教我了。”当下便向温氏兄弟拱手道谢，道：“咱们做奴才的，连万岁爷的金面也见不着，死了定给阎王老子大骂乌龟王八蛋。” 他去和小玄子比武之后，回到屋里，只和海老公说些比武的情形，温氏兄弟答允带他去上书房之事却一句不提，心想待我将那部经书偷来，好教海老乌龟大大惊喜一场。
未牌过后，温氏兄弟果然到来。温有方轻轻吹了声口哨，韦小宝便溜了出去。温氏兄弟打个手势，也不说话，向西便行。韦小宝跟在后面，有了上次的经历，他一路上留心穿廊过户时房舍的形状，以免回来时迷失道路。 从他住屋去上书房，比之去赌钱的所在更远，几乎走了一盏茶时分。温有道才轻声道：“上书房到了，一切小心些！”韦小宝道：“我理会得。” 两人带着他绕到后院，从旁边一扇小门中挨身而进，再穿过两座小小的花园，走进一间大房间中。 但见房中一排排都是书架，架上都摆满了书，也不知有几千几万本。韦小宝倒抽了口凉气，暗叫：“辣块妈妈不开花，开花养了小娃娃！他奶奶的，皇帝屋里摆了这许多书，整天见的都是书，朝也书（输），晚也书（输），还能赌钱么？海老公要的这几本书，我可到哪里找去？”他生长市井，一生之中从来没见过书房是什么样子，只道房中放得七八本书，就是书房了。从七八本书中，检一本写有“三十二”或“四十二”几个字的书，想必不难，此刻眼前突然出现了千卷万卷书籍，登时眼花缭乱，不由得手足无措，便想转身逃走。 温有道低声道：“再过一会，皇上便进书房来了，坐在这张桌边读书写字。” 韦小宝见那张紫檀木的书桌极大，桌面金镶玉嵌，心想：“桌上镶的黄金白玉，一定不是假货，挖了下来拿去珠宝店，倒有不少银子好卖。”见桌上摊着一本书，左首放着的砚台笔筒也都雕刻精致。椅子上披了锦缎，绣着一条金龙。韦小宝见了这等气派，心中不禁怦怦乱跳，寻思：“他奶奶的，这乌龟皇帝倒会享福！”书桌右首是一只青铜古鼎，烧着檀香，鼎盖的兽头口中袅袅吐出一缕缕青烟。 温有道道：“你躲在书架后面，悄悄见一见皇上，那就是了。皇上读书写字的时候，不许旁人出声，你可不得咳嗽打喷嚏。否则皇上一怒，说不定便叫侍卫将你拖出去斩首。”韦小宝道：“我自然知道，不能咳嗽打喷嚏，更加不得放响屁。”温有道脸一沉，道：“小兄弟，上书房不比别的地方，可不能说不恭不敬的胡话。”韦小宝伸了伸舌头，不敢说了。 只见他两兄弟一个拿起拂尘，一个拿了抹布，到处拂扫抹拭。书房中本就清洁异常，一尘不染，但他二人还是细心收拾。温氏兄弟抹了灰尘后，各人从一只柜子中取出一块雪白的白布，再在各处揩抹，揩抹一会，拿起白布来瞧瞧，看白布上有无黑迹，真比抹镜子还要细心，直抹了大半天，这才歇手。 温有道说道：“小兄弟，皇上这会儿还不来书房，今天是不来啦。耽会侍卫大人便要来巡查，见到你这张生面孔，定要查究，大伙儿可吃罪不起。”韦小宝道：“你们先去，我再等一会就走。”温氏兄弟齐声道：“那不成！”温有道说道：“宫里的规矩，你也不是不知道，皇上所到的地方，该当由谁侍候，半分也乱不得。宫里太监宫女几千人，倘若哪一个想见皇上，便自行走到皇上跟前，那还成体统吗？”温有方道：“好兄弟，不是咱哥儿不肯帮忙，咱二人能够进上书房，每天也只有这半个时辰，打扫揩抹过后，立刻便须出去。不瞒你说，别说你不能在上书房里多耽，便是咱哥儿俩，过了时不出去，给侍卫大人们查到了，那也是重则抄家杀头