Chapter 109 Chapter 5 Reunion for Farewell

In November 1987, family visits in mainland China were allowed. Six years later, I finally went back.During those few years, almost all the "outsiders" went back.The fiery family visit literature has gradually cooled down from the crying passion of reunion and embrace, and even the narrative of disillusionment began to appear.Across the Taiwan Strait, what the drifter thinks of day and night is the mountains and rivers of his homeland and his young relatives and friends. Even his parents should still be middle-aged. After 40 years, when they return, what they see is the skeleton of a beautiful dream.The returnees are old and still heartbroken, so I dare not go back even more. Not only do I have no relatives to visit, but I am also afraid of destroying the treasured memories because of disillusionment, and I am timid to be close to my hometown.

In May 1993, I read the news that Lu Qiaozhen was in the terminal stage of lung cancer in the alumni newsletter "Luojia" of Wuhan University. If I was shocked by an electric shock, I immediately decided to go to Shanghai to see her one last time.Qiaozhen was the first friend who wrote to me from mainland China after the mail was sent.The friendship between her and me is also my best youth memory, embedded in the confluence of the three rivers in Leshan, Sichuan.How can I be so heartless.I didn't go to see her sooner, but it was too late... A date to go to Shanghai has been set.I first talked with her husband, Senior Xu Xinguang, and made an appointment, and I found out over the phone.Yu Jun, who has been living in Shanghai, died of a heart attack a year ago.If I married him back then, my status as the fifth class of black would definitely be his bad luck.Old friends from Leshan, Yao Guanzu, Su Yuxi, and Peng Yande all passed away successively.The only person I could see in Shanghai was Qiaozhen, and Qiaozhen was on her deathbed.

At that time, the Shanghai airport was still quite chaotic, and I did not find the alumni of Wuhan University who picked me up for nearly fifty years.I'm afraid they don't even know each other.I almost got into a fake taxi led by a woman. Fortunately, I felt something wrong when I got to the car. I went back to the lobby to find the police and summoned a real taxi. I arrived at the Hilton Hotel where I was supposed to put down my luggage. Xu Xuechang took it to the Postal Hospital.Qiaozhen was helped to sit up, her brows and eyes were still bright, she said: "I know you are coming, I have been waiting."

She took out a piece of paper from under the pillow, and solemnly recited Du Fu's poem "Gift to the Eight Priests of the Guards" like a welcome speech: "Life does not meet each other, but moves like participating in business. Tonight and night, we will share this candlelight How long will she be young, her temples will be gray, and she will be half a ghost, exclaiming in her heart... She persisted in reading weakly, until "tomorrow is separated by mountains, and the world is boundless. "I leaned over her bedside, tears couldn't stop. She gasped intermittently and said goodbye to the next fifty years. Her youthful dreams have been shattered by reality. "You have been in Taiwan for these years. You can study hard and teach well. , really makes me envious. "She advised me to cherish everything I had and live a good life. When I walked out of the hospital in a daze, I knew that this reunion was a farewell. When I returned to Taiwan, I received the news of her death. She was sixty-nine years old that year.

I didn’t have a good impression of Shanghai, and I was not in the mood to stay this trip. I came out of the hospital and drove slowly on the busiest street in the past. Thinking about half a century ago when I was wearing the clothes of the Anti-Japanese War and they were out of place, I couldn’t help laughing feeling.The old people and the past are all gone. At this time, I have seen many important cities in the world, seen all kinds of glory, and the most important thing is that I have read many books that I should read, and I have done some things that I should do.If the vanity of Shanghai had attracted me to stay, I would have been fighting to death as a black five. Even if I survived, I would have to spend my whole life denying my true self.