Chapter 69 Chapter 17 No one deserves to be overlooked

Zhang Mingrui returned to the study room alone, Sheng Huainan raised his head, and the two of them met their eyes and looked at each other expressionlessly for a long time.Zhang Mingrui glanced at Luo Zhi's vacant seat, didn't ask anything, lowered his head and continued to flip through the book, picked up a pen to draw on the calculation paper. Sheng Huainan didn't ask where Xu Riqing went. When Luo Zhi was sleeping just now, Sheng Huainan heard a rustling sound, and saw Xu Riqing on the opposite side slip a note to Zhang Mingrui, Zhang Mingrui unfolded it, glanced at it, crumpled it up, and nodded.

So the two walked out of the study room together. Xu Riqing's expression couldn't be more obvious - it's as obvious as Zhang Mingrui's teasing and concern for Luo Zhi.Sheng Huainan knew that these two people must have gone out for a showdown. Zhang Mingrui was always joking, honest and silly, but Sheng Huainan always knew that he was actually a sober and decisive boy.They all understand that when it is time to be cruel, they can only be cruel, even if it hurts face and leaves a crack.Otherwise, if it is dragged to the end, everyone can only hug their heads and complain together.

However, he himself, who also believes in simplicity, is clearly doing something extremely inconsequential now.He seems to be suffering from a kind of laziness, and he will only procrastinate stupidly, as if the truth is revealed by time, and he just needs to stand aside and watch.Luo Zhi wouldn't run away, and neither would Ye Zhanyan, since he couldn't judge, he just became a bystander, didn't ask any questions, and didn't say anything. It's just that it didn't take into account that when the truth comes to light, there is another synonym called vicissitudes. Farewell, His Majesty the Emperor.

In just a short moment of hesitation, time polished her hidden sharpness and pride so dazzlingly that it almost hurt him. The sun gradually dimmed, and the sun was once again covered by clouds. Sheng Huainan found that all the words in the book couldn't even make a sentence, and they turned upside down and couldn't make sense of it.The long passage I just recited now looks so strange. He raised his hand and gently touched his lips with his index finger. That kiss was lighter than his own touch. But it was so heavy that he felt a dull pain in his heart.There was a sentence stuck in his throat, and he couldn't say it until her back disappeared behind the glass door.

Please don't go. "Why are you in a daze?" Zhang Mingrui asked several times in a low voice before waking him up. He smiled embarrassingly, closed the light green Ma Zhe book in awe-inspiring manner, and asked Zhang Mingrui, "Has anyone in our hospital hanged Ma Zhe before?" "I haven't heard of it. Why, do you want to be recorded in history?" "Don't look, can't look in." "are you crazy?" "People are not crazy to waste youth." He put away his schoolbag, stood up and left, and when he passed by Zhang Mingrui, he heard a moderate voice, "Actually, sometimes you really deserve a beating."

He was stunned, wondering if the other party was teasing him for making up his mind to test Mazhe naked, but when he lowered his head and saw the serious side face of the other party, he immediately understood. "Each to each other." He wanted to smile, but found that his cheeks were also stiff. Take the elevator to the 11th floor of the Science Building, then go up the side stairs at the corner, and you will be able to climb to the highest rooftop in the school. He has always liked to stand on high places, high places that are empty and empty.I forgot where I heard a saying, "In this world, some people are born to attract attention, and some people are born to be unwilling to be lonely. If the person who is unwilling to be lonely by nature happens to have the fate that attracts attention, then it is naturally the best of both worlds."

Sheng Huainan knew that he was unwilling to be lonely. It’s just that his so-called not being lonely is not really loving the lively circle of friends—he just wants to stand on the highest place and watch the mediocre crowds of people coming and going below, which can give him a sense of fulfillment. And complete happiness - of course, must use the attitude of looking down. He is afraid of the so-called intimacy.It's not that he's worried about being abandoned by others for his flaws to be exposed -- rather, it's just that he sees the high expectations in the other's eyes before they get close.

It's not about being afraid of your imperfections being discovered.Just don't want them to be disappointed. Does this nuance barely qualify as kindness?Sheng Huainan doesn't often think wildly, but once his thoughts go off the rails, he can run wild and never get back. The iron gate of the roof is half-closed. He suddenly had a little vague expectation. Is... is Luo Zhi here? He brought Luo Zhi here before.The only time they played together that could be called a date was Houhai Xidan Wangfujing. He couldn't remember exactly which places he walked through. The only thing he could remember clearly was the many things she said along the way.The stories she tells, the confusion she confides, the arrogance and pride she hides, the gentle expectation and shyness when she bows her head.

Before sending her back to the dormitory, he had a whim and said, there is a place I often go to, do you want to take a look together? This rooftop seems to be his secret base.When I was in high school, there was a library in the school that was closed all the year round. In fact, there was a way to climb up to the low roof from the outside. Sometimes he would climb up to enjoy the wind after escaping evening self-study. No one knew about it, including Ye Zhanyan. In fact, she already liked Luo Zhi very much—it was the kind of liking that made people want to express everything about themselves and share all their secrets.

In other words, I just expect her to praise me, it's really nice here. It was also that day that he vaguely said that he especially liked to stand on a high place and look at the people below, even if he was on flat ground, he also liked to watch from a distance without expression.Luo Zhi leaned against the bustling and splendid night view of the business district, cast her eyes on the sporadic and distant lights on the north side of the school, and after a long time said slowly, "Me too, but I was forced to do so before." forced? Uncomfortable in the crowd, do not get along.Maybe it's because I had too few friends when I was young, so I didn't know how to blend in. I had fewer and fewer friends, so I stopped embarrassingly trying to please the central figures in those groups. Later, I played alone and became more and more marginalized.But just like looking at others from a high place, I actively choose to climb up, and then slowly transform from a lonely and rejected outsider to a different person standing above the crowd, so that I can be blatantly lonely, Extraordinarily lonely, no need to be pitied by others, and even feel satisfied.To put it bluntly, in fact, it is nothing more than forming a habit, and then giving these simple states a special meaning for the sake of looking good, it seems to be really extraordinary.

She mumbled a lot before waking up, squinted her eyes and smiled embarrassedly, and said, "What about you? You shouldn't be an outsider who was rejected, right? You have the right to choose." The last sentence was said with such certainty, as if he had known him for many years and understood him deeply. Sheng Huainan's eyes were blank, and he was silent for a long time. The girl next to him hurriedly apologized, saying that he was presumptuous.But she didn't know that when he bowed his head to say sorry, it was the time when he suddenly wanted to hug her - he raised his hand halfway. When she faced him, she was sometimes extra cautious.Her cautiousness and his own hesitant pride often combined to kill the chance of a hug. The six complete works of Gibran that were going to be given to her in the schoolbag hurt his shoulders. He shook his head and said with a smile, let's go, we are going back. Memories flooded out, Sheng Huainan's index finger touching the doorknob was cold. is it you? When I listened intently, someone was talking. "Don't talk about it, there is an exam tomorrow, so study hard, I don't want to discuss this issue." "I'm not in the mood to review, you should speak clearly today." "There's nothing to say. You still don't understand. It's because you can't see your eyebrows high and your eyes low that you stalk her so hard. You haven't finished yet, have you?!" I can't help but laugh. He was a little dumbfounded, it turned out to be a showdown of three people.He listened for a while, and one of the boys who obviously had the upper hand was arrogant, while the other insisted on the word "past". What's more interesting is that the girl caught in the middle refused to give a quick and clear sentence. In conclusion, keeping saying ambiguous words to appease both parties has made the quarrel more and more rigid. He walked down the stairs slowly, smiled wryly, and his thoughts suddenly returned to two years ago. At that moment, Ye Zhanyan was sitting on a high stand, watching them condescendingly.A boy in Class 6 whose face he could no longer remember was full of tears, and he yelled like Ma Jingtao, the roaring leader in Qiong Yao's drama, and he couldn't remember the content of the yelling.He turned his head to look at Ye Zhanyan. Although Ye Zhanyan didn't smile, the corners of his mouth were still raised suspiciously, his eyes were slightly narrowed, dangerous and seductive, and there was also a trace of suppressed publicity and joy—he didn't know what that expression meant, but he fascinated. However, recalling the scene of being jealous now, Sheng Huainan couldn't help laughing out embarrassingly, it was so clichéd and naive, but at that time he actually suppressed the boring emotion in his heart seriously, and said seriously to the roaring boy, please don't Harassing Zhanyan, I am her boyfriend. He couldn't remember how it ended up. In short, the elegance and calmness he deliberately maintained seemed to fall into the endless entanglement of the other party's inarticulate speech.In the end, he stood there exhausted, and Ye Zhanyan came down from the stands at some point and hugged him from behind—he still clearly remembered her cool embrace, and a very soft sentence, "Are you really Do you love me?" It turns out that love requires a qualification certificate.People need various forms to prove themselves, and all kinds of tossing and tossing that would be foolish when they calm down later are an important process in the emotions at that time.It seems that without the barrier of the fire-breathing dragon, the love between the knight and the princess would not be complete. It's nice to be young.Sheng Huainan's smile deepened. In his ears, the debate behind the door became a merry farce of children's self-righteousness. He had just gone down two floors when suddenly a boy rushed down from above and passed him in the stairwell, followed by a girl chasing him down, and finally a boy followed by calling the girl's name.Sheng Huainan wondered, why should he have such a bad expression—after all, the tearful and angry boy who led the battle still chose to take the stairs instead of jumping straight down—as long as he was alive, it was no big deal. no big deal. It's just that in life, some people may never come back. He turned back, climbed up the stairs, and pushed open the door to the roof again. The desolate winter wind in Beijing messed up his hair, and he looked out, the city was covered with a gray cement coat, and the gray-black residual snow made it look even more miserable. Today, there are very few pedestrians on the road below. No one ever deserved to let him look down. He should have known. The door behind him creaked.Sheng Huainan's heart seemed to be clenched by an invisible hand, and he turned his head abruptly. A slightly chubby figure in a purple down jacket, with a few sparse bangs on her forehead, couldn't hide her stunned expression. It's Zheng Wenrui. Sheng Huainan calmed down, smiled and said to her, "It's you. Long time no see." Indeed long time no see. The last time I saw her was more than a month ago, during the last autumn rain in Beijing. Luo Zhi's body hidden under the pink hellokitty raincoat trembled slightly, her white lips moved, and she said to him, but Dad can no longer buy me a raincoat.Dad is dead. The rain curtain blocked her view. Sheng Huainan stood in the rain for a long time. He lowered his umbrella and listened quietly to the sound of raindrops hitting the umbrella cloth. In the end, Luo Zhi looked at him with a look full of sadness, and he suddenly felt a kind of fear, obviously she was the one who was tempted, but in the end it seemed that everything about him was spread out in the damp and cold air, and he couldn't hide it. The heartache at that moment made him suddenly have an impulse to call her out immediately, and he would ask her clearly.He turned on his phone, but saw two unread messages. He didn't know when they came in, but he didn't read them. Just then footsteps were heard.When he raised his eyes, he saw Zheng Wenrui. He didn't know when she appeared behind him, just standing in the heavy rain with a red umbrella, tears all over his face. "I sent you a text message, why didn't you reply?" Her voice was a little shrill. He hurriedly looked down at his phone, and it turned out that the two messages belonged to her. "Where are you? Are you not caught in the rain?" "Where are you, are you not caught in the rain?"