Chapter 11 Chapter 6 The Temple of the Bull 2

8 She didn't know how long it took to reach the center of the maze, because time soon lost its meaning to her.She knew it wouldn't be for a long time because the baby's cries continued.Rosie was actually pretty close to it, but the cries were intermittent.Twice she heard the dull, monotonous pawing of the bull, and she stopped, clasped her hands on her chest, and waited for him to appear. Whenever the road signs were used up, she always picked up each seed for the next use, so as not to find the way back.When she finally came to an intersection, she saw a green flash directly ahead and walked in.

She came to the end of the passage and stood at the entrance, where a room with a flagstone floor appeared.She glanced over quickly, dazed by a cavernous black hole on the roof.She looked down again, noticing the piles of cow dung scattered in every corner, and quickly shifted her attention to the center of the room.On a rug lay the plump, curly-haired baby.Her eyes were swollen from crying, and her cheeks were filled with tears, but she soon calmed down, at least temporarily.Her feet were exposed, and it looked like she had tried to see her toes.Now and then she let out a tearful sob or gasp.The sound touched Rosie's heart, as if the baby knew vaguely that she had been abandoned.

Give me back my baby. whose child?Who is she?Who brought her here? She decided not to care about their answers anymore, at least not yet.She had lain here too long, sweet and lonely in the center of the maze, trying to comfort herself by looking at her toes exposed to the cold green light. This light is not good for her, Rosie thought bewilderedly, as she hurried to the center of the maze, it must be some kind of ray, she thought. The baby turned its head, saw Rosie, and held out its hand to her.Rossi's heart was completely conquered by this gesture.She wrapped the child's chest and stomach with a sheet and picked her up.The baby, who appeared to be three months old, put her arms around Rosie's neck and leaned her head on Rosie's shoulder.She began to cry again, but very faintly.

"It's all right," Rosie said, patting the little one's back tenderly.She could smell the baby's skin, warmer and sweeter than any perfume.She rubbed her nose against the hair that grew on her delicate little head. "It's all right, Caroline, everything's fine, we're leaving that horrible old devil..." She heard the pawing and kicking behind her, getting closer, and she shut her mouth, praying that the bull didn't hear her hate-filled voice, that Vinlinnis' kicks would turn quickly and take another path, as soon as possible. leave them.This time her prayers were not answered.The kicking sound was approaching, getting louder and louder, and finally stopped.She heard the heavy breathing of a gigantic beast, like the rapid panting of a dumpy man who has just climbed the stairs.

Rosie gradually felt a familiar, stiff feeling, and she turned to face Erinnis.Wen Linnis is here. The bull could smell me and charged at me.That's what the woman in the red pleated skirt told her... and she told her something else.It was me it was looking for, but it would kill us both.Did Erinnis smell her? "Rosie didn't think so. She was thinking that the bull's job was to protect the baby, and it was attracted here by the cry of the baby just like Rosie. Anyway, the bull has come, this is a bull that Rosie has seen The ugliest beast in the world. It had just rushed out of the tunnel, and its shape was not very clear. Rosie seemed to see it standing there with its head down motionless.The deep clefts in the bull's huge front hooves made it look like the claws of a large bird, cutting non-stop on the stone floor.It was at least four feet taller than Rosie at the shoulders, and she guessed it must have weighed at least two tons.Its lowered head is flat, like a hammer, shining like silk.The bull's horn is short and stubby, less than a foot long, but it is pointed and thick.It wasn't hard for Rosie to imagine it crushing her neck and stomach effortlessly... grabbing her by the back if she ran away.She couldn't imagine what it would be like to die like this; not even after living with Norman for all those years.

The bull looked up, and she saw that it did have one eye, a blue, transparent thing, huge and strange, just above its snout.It lowered its head, stretched out its claw-like front hooves, and began to scratch the floor non-stop.She knew one thing: it was going to attack. The baby let out a deafening cry that almost pierced Rosie's eardrum, and she jumped up. "Shh, baby, don't be afraid, don't be afraid." But the fear had come--a fear of immeasurable magnitude.The bull intends to rip out her guts and decorate these gleaming walls with them.She thought that if they were placed on a green wall, they would look black.She had no place to hide, not even a post, and even if she ran away, the blind cow could hear her running on the stone road, and before she had run half way, he had her When it was broken in two, it would hold her tightly with its horns, throw her against the wall, jump again, and then step on her until she was crushed to death, even babies.

Although it is one-eyed and blind, its sense of smell is fine. Rossi's eyes were wide open, observing what was happening in front of him, almost hypnotized by the sound of the bull's hooves scratching the ground.The screeching and kicking finally stopped. She looked down at the damp pajamas crumpled up in her hands, where a stone was wrapped. Its sense of smell is fine. She got down on one knee, squinted one eye, and took aim at the bull, holding the baby tightly with her right hand and opening her pajama bag with her left.The cloth she wrapped the stone in was crimson because it was soaked with the blood of "Wendy Yarrow."But the heavy rain had already washed away much of the blood, and the color of the pajamas had turned into light pink, only the corners of the clothes still showed a bright rose red.

Rosie held the stone in her left hand, feeling its weight.While the bull's front legs were bent, she quietly aimed the stone at him and threw the cloth-wrapped stone along the floor to the bull's left side.Its head thumped in that direction, its nostrils gleaming, and it rushed towards the bloody thing it could hear and smell. Rosie stood up quickly and put the rest of her pajamas next to the baby's sheets.She still held the packet containing the last three seeds in her hand, but Rosie felt nothing.All she knew was to run at full speed, out of the passage, and Vinlinnis was attacking the stone behind her.She was running at full speed in slow motion, and now it all feels like a dream, because only in dreams, especially in nightmares, that's how people run when the devil is two steps away from you.Running in nightmares often turns into slow motion.

Rosie heard the sound of the beast kicking and hitting the ground approaching again, and she rushed into a narrow passage, and the sound was approaching again quickly, holding the crying baby tightly to her breast with one hand , all the way screaming and running for their lives in a hurry.But the bull was much faster than she was, and he passed her... fading away from the other passage on the right.Wen Linnis realized that the rock was a trick in time and came back to catch her, but it took the wrong intersection. Rosie hurried on, panting heavily, dry mouth, feeling her heart beat faster in her temples, throat, and eyeballs.She had no idea where she was, which direction she was running, and now everything depended on the seeds used as road signs.Even if she misses a grain, it could keep her lingering here for hours, until she's finally spotted and run over by a bull.

She came to a fork in the road and searched for a long time, but found no seeds.But she saw a glistening smear of bull-piss splatter, and it made her think horribly, had the seeds been put there at all?She can't remember.One less means nothing.But she didn't remember that she hadn't let it go, and it was possible that the seed she had planted was carried away by the bull stepping on the hoof of the bull as it swaggered across the intersection. The passage was twenty yards long and led to another fork.She rushed in and told herself not to panic if she couldn't find the seeds, just take a few steps back to the three-way intersection, and she could try another intersection without any effort.If she can keep her sanity, she should.

She saw the seed, its sharp point pointing unmistakably to the right of the fork, and she couldn't help whimpering.She kissed the baby on the cheek and saw that she was asleep again. 9 Rosie held Caroline and turned down a passage to the right, shaking her by the arm as she went.She had never experienced such an overwhelming sense of fear.Although she would always remember to put a seed as a road sign at every turning point, but she actually forgot at this fork in the road! When Rossi came to the last turn, he saw the steps ahead.She couldn't help panting heavily, weeping with joy, and hurried out of the passage, and after climbing five or six steps, she turned around and looked back.From here, she could see the labyrinth winding its way to the end of the darkness, with many left turns, right turns, forks, and dead ends. Far to the right, she could still hear Erinnis galloping.It ran farther and farther.They were safe, and Rosie's shoulders relaxed in relief. Suddenly, the voice of "Wendy" came from my ear: Please don't mind me saying this, you have to bring this child back here.As good as you are, things aren't done yet. She certainly isn't done yet.There are still more than two hundred steps waiting for her, this time she is still holding the baby, and she is exhausted. Baby, don't rush, take your time.Reason is speaking.Do it right. Rosie began to climb the steps, looking back over and over again. Can bulls climb steps? The baby was getting heavier in her arms.She had vaguely seen the bright light above, and she narrowed her eyes.The bright light seemed to be playing tricks on her, and she didn't get any closer after walking for a long time. Her breathing became more and more rapid, and the blood vessels on her temples throbbed more violently.For the first time in two weeks, her kidneys really felt pain. She couldn't care less about that, and kept her eyes fixed on the bright lights.At last they began to expand, and finally became an exit at the top of the steps. When there were five steps away from the top floor, the muscles in her right leg suddenly began to convulse, and the muscles behind her knee twisted violently, almost affecting the right half of her buttocks. She massaged her legs and felt like is a rock.The corners of her mouth trembled in pain, and she moaned softly.She kept massaging her leg muscles, and it took a long time for her to completely relax.She waited a moment, wondering if she would do it again, then focused on her good leg and carefully climbed the last few steps.She stood on the top floor and looked around, feeling a little dizzy.At last she broke free from her terrible confinement. While she was still underground, those thick clouds had parted and the sky was filled with the hazy summer sun.Rosie turned her face covered with sweat and tears, the air was heavy and humid, but Rosie felt it was the sweetest air she had ever breathed in her life.She could still hear, somewhere in the distance, the thunder continuing to roar like a defeated bully resignedly trying to frighten an opponent.The thunder made her think of Erinys still running in the dark underground, looking for a woman who had violated its territory and stolen its dignity.Rosie thought with a slight smile on her face.It doesn't matter, you gay bastard, whore or not, she's already gone. 10 Rosie left the steps with slow steps.She sat on a road leading to a dead wood.mouth, and put the baby on your lap.She just wanted to take a good breath and let the hazy sun shine warmly on her back.When she raised her head again, she realized that she had just dozed off for a while. She stood up, touched her calf with strained muscles, and withdrew her hand in pain.She heard a flock of birds chirping, and it sounded like a big family arguing over Sunday lunch.Rosie changed a comfortable position for the child, she snorted contentedly, a small bubble was blown between her two lips, and she returned to tranquility.Rosie felt both ridiculous and jealous of her calm and confident sleeping posture. She walked along the path for a while, then turned her head to look at the only living tree with gleaming green leaves and purple-red fruits, and the "Classic Fable" subway station was not far ahead .The scenery here made her linger, she admired it fascinatedly, and silently remembered them in her heart. These scenes are real, she thought, if the objects I see are not real, how can they be so clear?And I know that I just dozed off for a while, how can people fall asleep in a dream?That is, how can you fall asleep after falling asleep? Reason says, forget about them.You'd better forget, at least for now. It might be right. Rossi set off again.A big tree fell in the middle of the road. She wanted to move it away, but after working for a long time, she realized that she could avoid the big tree and walk by. There was a sound of rushing water in her ears, and she walked to the creek, and found that the black water had become shallower, and those few stepping stones had turned into stones as big as floor tiles, and the creek had lost its charming charm. Charm, now it smells like a toilet. The birds began to argue again—yes, you did; no, I didn't; yes, you did.There are twenty or thirty large birds on the roof of the temple.She had never seen such a big bird before, and she didn't know where they came from and why they were here. The baby writhed restlessly in her sleep before she realized what she was doing.- She hugged her closer to her chest, still looking at the big bird.They take off at the same time, flapping wings as huge as sheets on a clothesline.They didn't seem to like her looking at them like that.Most flew to the dead branch of the fallen tree, and a few continued to circle the hazy sky like a doom in a western movie. Where do they come from?What exactly do you want to do? More and more questions that Rossi couldn't answer.She put them aside and stepped across the stream on the stones.As she approached the temple, she vaguely saw a path running along its side.Although Rosie was still naked and thorny bushes grew on both sides of the path, she still hugged Caroline and walked decisively up the path.She explored cautiously, dodging left and right to prevent her body from being pierced.Despite this, the right leg was punctured and some blood flowed. She came to a corner of the temple, looked up at the roof, and found that there were some changes in the building, but she couldn't tell what the changes were.Seeing that the woman in red was still standing beside the stone pillar, she took six or seven steps in the direction where she was standing, and turned her head to observe the building again with her whole body and mind. This time she noticed the change immediately, and she sighed in surprise.The Bull Temple now looks dull and unreal...it's flat.It reminded Rosie of a poem she read in high school about a painting of the sea with a boat in it.She felt that the building had become very strange, that it had no sense of perspective, like a poor oil painting by a mediocre painter. "Woman! You woman!" She turned her head and saw "Wendy" questioning her impatiently. "Hurry up and get that baby here! You're not touristy!" Rosie ignored her.She risked her life to bring this baby back, and she wasn't going to follow her orders.She opened the quilt and saw that the little baby was a girl just like herself, and a girl with nothing on.They have only two similarities.There were no teeth scars on the child's body, and as far as Rossi observed, there wasn't even a single birthmark on the sweet little body.She used a finger to stroke it from top to bottom, from knees to stomach to shoulders, it was completely white and flawless. Yes, there is no time for nothing.Rosie, since you've gone through fire and water for her, since you've saved her from the dark bull and everything else that God knows will happen, are you really going to give her to these two women?Neither of them is very healthy. The woman on the top of the mountain still has some mental problems, which is a serious mental illness.Are you going to hand over your child to them? "She's right," said the brown woman.Rosie turned away from the voice. "Wendy Yarrow" stood looking at Rosie knowingly. "Yes," she said, as if Rosie had raised her doubts aloud, and nodded at her again, "I know what you're thinking, let me tell you. She's definitely crazy, but Her madness has not been passed on to her child, and she knows it. She cannot keep this child, and neither can you." Rosie glanced up the hill, and all she could see was the woman in the red dress standing beside the foal, waiting for the outcome of the matter. "What's her name? The child's mother? Is it called—" "It doesn't matter," the brown-skinned woman in red interrupted hurriedly, as if she didn't want Rosie to say it. "It doesn't matter what her name is. What matters is her mental state. She suffered After all those disasters and misfortunes, he became an impatient man. We'd better go now and stop talking nonsense." Rossi said: "I've decided to call my baby Caroline. Norman said I could call her that. He didn't care what she was called." She began to cry. "That sounds like a good name. Don't you cry, let's go." She put a hand on Rosie's shoulder, and they began to climb to the top of the hill.The hill grass caresses Rosie's legs, knees and bare feet tenderly. "Woman, can you listen to my advice?" Rosie looked at her strangely. "I know it's hard to take advice when you're in pain, but please consider that I'm entitled to it: I was born into a slave family, I grew up in chains, and a lady paid a ransom to save me Come out, she's not a goddess. That's her." She pointed to the one who stood there silently watching and waiting for them. "She drank the water of youth, and she gave it to me, and now we are together, though I don't know her well, but when I look in the mirror, I can't find a wrinkle in my own face. I buried my child , children's children, and children's grandchildren, until the fifth generation. I have seen one war after another, rising and falling like waves, washing away footprints and breaking down castles built of sand; I see to the streets of cities where countless corpses were burned, and thousands of heads were hung from pillars; and I have seen wise leaders murdered and stupid ones take their place. I lived till Nowadays." She sighed deeply. "I'm alive to this day, and if there's anything worth suggesting, it's this one. Do you want to hear it? Answer quickly, I don't want her to hear it. We'd better get closer." "Yes, I want to hear it, please tell me," Rossi said. "It's better to be ruthless about the events of the past, not to see them as a heavy blow, but as a necessity for survival. Remember, even if it is not for your life, for the sake of the gods, please Never look at her!" The woman in red emphasized her tone, and quietly finished the last sentence.In less than a minute, Rosie was in front of the blond woman again.She stared blankly at the hem of Rose Maid's rose-red skirt, and it wasn't until Caroline struggled in her arms, stretching out her thin arms indignantly, that she realized that she had just hugged her. too tight.When the child woke up, she raised her head and looked at Rosie with interest in her bright eyes.Her pupils were a hazy blue like a clear summer sky. "You did a great job," the sweet husky voice told her, "thank you. Please leave her to me." Rose Maddow stretched out her hands, bringing over a large black shadow.Rosie saw what she didn't want to see: a moss-thick, gray-green sludge between the woman's fingers, and Rosie pulled the baby away without a second thought.This time the baby struggled harder, and let out a short cry or two now and then. A brown arm rests on Rosie's shoulder. "I told you, it's okay, she won't hurt her. I'll take care of her with all my might until our trip is over. It won't be too long, she'll finally hand over the baby to... oh, later You don't have to worry. The baby is hers for a while. Please leave it to her now." This was one of the toughest predicaments Rosie had ever encountered in her life.She stretched out her hands to hold the baby, and when the hands with long black shadows took the baby, she gave a feeble snort of satisfaction.The baby looked up at the face Rosie had to avoid... and she smiled. "Excellent. Excellent," the sweet, husky voice murmured.There was something in the voice that was very similar to Norman's sneer, and it made Rosie want to scream. "It's getting dark, darling, isn't it? It's annoying, babies don't like dark, oh, mother knows." The baby was held up in colorful hands next to the rose red classic tutu.The child raised his head and smiled, resting his head on his mother's chest and closing his eyes again. "Rosie?" said the woman in the tutu, who seemed to be in a psychotic state, looking at her thoughtfully, with the voice of a despot tyrant giving orders to an imaginary army. "Here I am," Rosie answered in an almost whispering voice. "Really Rosie? Rosie himself?" "I think . . . yes. "Do you remember what I told you before you went down the mountain?" "Yes," Rosie said, "I remember it very well." She wished she didn't remember anything. "So what did I tell you?" Rose Maddow demanded aggressively. "What did I say, Rosie herself?" "You say, 'I repay.'" "Yes, I reciprocate. It's very dark underground, you must feel uncomfortable?" She thought carefully. "Uncomfortable, but that's not the worst. I think the worst was the creek, I tried to drink from there." "Are there many things in your life that you want to forget?" "Yes, I think so." "Including your husband?" She nodded. The woman held the sleeping child and leaned her to her breast with an unnatural confidence in her voice that made Rosie shudder. "You should divorce him." Rosie was dumbfounded and speechless. "Men are born with words," Rose Maddow gushed. "Some men are gentle and cultivated, but others are not. If we have the misfortune to meet a man who is not gentle and cultivated, a scoundrel, shall we Don't we feel cheated? Don't we sit in rocking chairs next to our beds and lament our fate? Can we be mad at a truck? No, because a truck is on wheels and it pulls the whole world, be mad at it The qi can only be crushed by it in the end. Scoundrels and brutes must be punished, and we must have faith in this, because there is still a difference between brutes." Bill is not an animal, Luo Bai thought.She knew she would never dare to speak out in front of this woman.It's not hard to imagine how easily she would grab her and slit her throat. "Brutals will bite each other in any situation," said Rose Maddow. "They look down and wobble and charge. That's their way, you understand?" Rosie suddenly felt that she did know what the woman was talking about, and it frightened her.She raised her finger to touch her lips, feeling it was chapped and hot. "There will be no fighting, because they don't know each other. They—" "Beasts bite each other," Rose Meadow repeated, and held something out in front of her.It took her a long time to realize that it was a gold armband she wore on her right elbow. "I...I can't..." "Take it," snapped the woman in the short skirt suddenly impatiently, "Take it, take it! Stop nagging! For God's sake, stop your nagging at once, you stupid lamb! " Rosie picked up the armband with trembling hands.It was still cold to the touch, despite being pressed against the blond woman's flesh.If she insists on me wearing it, I really don't know what to do.thought Rossi.But Rose Maddow didn't force her to wear it.She simply held out her colorful hands and pointed to the olive trees.The easel under the tree was gone, and the oil painting had returned to its normal size.The picture has undoubtedly changed, the room on Ivy Avenue can still be seen from above, but the woman standing at the door in the picture is gone, the room is very dark, and a few blond hairs and a shoulder are exposed under the blanket on the bed. That's me, Rosie thought oddly.I am sleeping and dreaming this dream. "Go on," Rose Maddow said, stroking the back of her head.Rosie took a step closer to the frame, mostly to get rid of even the slightest caress of that cold, repulsive hand.Suddenly she realized she could hear the muffled sound of traffic, her feet and knees buried in the grass, and crickets bouncing around. "Keep going, real little Rosie, thank you for saving my baby," "Our boy," Rosie finished, feeling a wave of panic.A man who could correct this woman was probably a psycho himself. But the woman in the rose red classical skirt was not only not angry, but happy.She replied, "Yes, yes, our boy, if you like. Now go on. Remember what must be remembered, and forget what must be forgotten. Get out of my protection After the circle, you can only rely on yourself to protect yourself." Don't tell me, Rosie thought.You can rest assured that I will never come to you. Her train of thought was interrupted.She saw a woman in the oil painting come to her bed and take off the blanket from where her shoulders were exposed. This is no longer the original picture. It becomes a window again. "Keep going." The woman in red said softly, "You did the right thing, get out of here before she can feel something." As Rosie approaches the frame, Rose Maddow's voice comes from behind her, neither sweet nor hoarse this time, but a murderous voice yelling, "Remember, I will pay you back!" Rosie was so frightened by the sudden cry that she closed her eyes. Suddenly, Rosie concluded that the woman in the classical skirt had forgotten everything she had done for her and was ready to kill her.She tripped over something, probably the frame of a painting, and she felt like she was falling.She felt as if an acrobat was doing somersaults in her stomach, and then darkness came over her eyes and ears.In the darkness, she vaguely heard some terrible sounds getting closer in the distance. Maybe it was just the sound of trains passing in the underground tunnel of the Central Station, or the roar of thunder, or maybe it was the bull Wen Linnis in the underground labyrinth. With its head lowered and its stubby horns raised high, it made a roar as it ran blindly. For a while, perhaps, Rosie lost all consciousness. 11 Like a dreamless embryo lying in a sac of placental fluid, she swayed silently and unconsciously until seven o'clock in the morning.The small alarm clock imitating Big Ben next to the bed made endless noise, which woke her up from her sleep.Rosie sat up straight, waving her hands in the air like chicken paws, and continued to yell dream words that she had forgotten the meaning of and that she couldn't understand: "Don't make me see you! Don't make me see you! Don't Push me! Don't push me!" At this time, she saw the cream-colored walls and the cute little sofa that gave people a sense of illusory luxury, and the bright sunlight poured into the room from the window, and they finally brought her back to reality.Whoever she's been with in her dreams, wherever she's been, and now she's Rosie McClendon again, the single woman recording audiobooks for a living.She spent many years with a bad man, but eventually left him and met a good man.She lived in a small room at the end of the second floor at 897 Ivy Avenue, with a window overlooking Bryant Park.Oh, and one more thing, she's a single woman who's never going to eat a foot-long hot dog again in her life, especially the kind with pickles in it.They seemed to disagree with her.She couldn't remember what dreams she had. Remember what you must remember, and forget what you must forget. But she remembers how it all started: She entered the world of the picture, like Alice in Wonderland. Rosie sat perfectly still for a moment, pulling herself firmly back into the world of the real Rosie, reaching for the blaring alarm clock.Instead of pressing the alarm switch, she threw it to the ground.It lay there, still buzzing with excitement and senselessness. "Hire some disabled people. It's fun to watch them," she said hoarsely. She leaned forward, picked up the alarm clock, and out of the corner of her eye, she saw the blond woman again.She was amazed that she felt nothing like the docile Rosie Daniels.She was holding the alarm clock, looking for the button of the alarm watch with her thumb, and suddenly remembered something, she looked at her right arm, there was nothing extra on it. She stopped the alarm clock, sat up straight, pushed away the blanket and sheets, and saw that she was naked and naked. "Where's my pajamas?" she called to the empty room.She felt that she had never made such a stupid sound... It was naturally a puzzling thing: sleeping in pajamas and waking up naked.Fourteen years of marriage to Norman hadn't taught her to live with such oddities.She put the alarm clock on the bedside table, stretched her legs under the bed— "Wow!" she yelled because of the pain in her buttocks and calves, "Wow, wow, wow!" Sitting on the edge of the bed, she moved her right leg first, then her left leg tremblingly. Both legs hurt badly, especially her right leg.It was as if she had completed all the work plans for the old grandfather yesterday, pushing the stone mill and stepping on the pedal machine all day, even though her only exercise that day was a walk with Bill, which was just a leisurely street walk. It suddenly occurred to her that the sound was like a train rumbling by in the underground tunnel of Central Station. what sound? For a moment she almost caught hold of it, but it floated away again.She stood up carefully, stood by the bed for a while, and stumbled towards the bathroom.She felt that her right leg would tense as long as she exerted force, and her kidneys also ached.In the name of God, what's going on here? She remembered reading somewhere that people sometimes run in their sleep.Maybe she was also running in the dream?Perhaps there had been some terrible chaos erupting in that dream she could no longer remember, and she had to run so hard to get out of them?She stopped at the door of the bathroom and looked back at the bedroom again.The sheets were crumpled, but not knotted or crumpled as she'd expected. Rosie saw one thing she didn't like that reminded her of the terrible past, and that was blood.There are thin lines, not like drops of nosebleeds or marks left by split lips... unless they were broken by too much movement when turning over in a dream.Second thought is that she visits the Cardinal (Rosie's mother insists she call her monthly period by that), but it's not quite the time yet. Is it your craving, woman?Is your moon full? "What?" she asked the empty house. "What moon?" Once again she was missing something.When almost caught, let it float away.She looked down at herself, and at least one secret was lifted.From the looks of it, she scratched herself.His calf, from which there was no doubt that the blood had trickled onto the sheet. Did I instinctively scratch myself when I fell asleep?Could it be— This time the idea lasted a little longer, maybe it wasn't an idea at all, but an imagination.She saw a naked woman—herself—walking cautiously along the side of the road, which was overgrown with thorns.As she turned on the shower and stretched out a hand to test the water temperature, she found herself wondering if someone who had vivid dreams could actually bleed in their dreams, like those who bleed from their hands and feet on Good Friday. same as people. Do you mean you were insulted? I didn't say anything because I don't know anything, she answered herself.多么可信！她几乎相信自己的话是真的。一个熟睡者的皮肤上会自然而然地出现一道抓痕，同这个人在梦中同一时刻做出的动作完全相称。这道抓痕并不是不可能产生的；而完全不可能的是，一个睡着的人只因为梦见自己赤身裸体，她的睡衣因此便从身上消失了。 脱掉你身上穿的那件东西。 我不可能那么做！除了睡衣以外，我没有穿任何东西！ 幽灵般的声音。她听出其中一个声音是她自己，而另一个呢？ It doesn't matter.真的没有关系。她在睡梦中脱掉了睡衣，就是这么回事。也许是一段清醒后的幕间插曲，她在黑暗中跑过，踩着白色踏脚石跨过了黑色溪流，后来她就脱掉了睡衣，只要她找一找，一定会在床底下发现它皱皱巴巴地揉成了一团。 “对极了，除非是我把它吃掉了。或者是——” 她把试水温的手缩了回来，好奇地看着它。手指尖上有褪了色的玫瑰红污迹，指甲盖上也有一点儿。她慢慢地把手举到面前，内心深处有一个声音回答了这个问题，这一次不是理智的声音，毫不夸张地说，这声音把她吓了一大跳。不要把摸过种子的手放在嘴里！don't want!千万不要！ “什么种子？”罗西恐怖地问道。她闻了闻手指，只有魔鬼般的芳香，一股使她想起烤肉和烤糖饼的味道。“什么种子？昨天晚上发生了什么事情？是不是——”她停住了。她知道自己想说什么。但是她不喜欢听见那个问题像一宗没有完成的工作那样在空中盘旋。事情还会继续下去吗？ 她回到喷头下面，调整好水温，直到不至于热得受不了为止。她用香皂特别小心地擦洗着手指，连指甲下面也看不见一丝那种玫瑰红了。接着她又洗了头发，一边洗一边唱起歌来。过了五分钟，她走出浴室，让身体晾干，开始有一种真正是肉体的感觉，不再感到像电话线和玻璃渣一样麻木和僵硬了。她的声音也接近正常了。 她开始穿牛仔裤和体恤衫，想起拉比·利弗茨约她吃午餐，又换上了一件新买的裙子。她坐在镜子前，开始辫发辫。这是一件花费时间的工作，因为她的背后和肩膀以及大臂仍然感到十分僵硬。热水使这种情况改变了许多，但没有彻底恢复正常。 是的，这个婴儿个头很大。she thought.她那么专心地辫着她的发辫，以至于不知道自己都想了些什么。即将辫好时，她从镜子里面看到身后有什么东西扩大了她的视野。 “哦，我的上帝！”罗西无力地喊了一声，她站起身，拖着毫无知觉的双腿走过房间。 在正常的情况下，这幅画面上的金发女子总是站在山顶上，发辫搭在两只肩肿骨之间，左手高举，可是现在她把左手放在了眼皮上，用它遮挡着阳光，画面上作为雷雨前兆的云层已经消失。穿玫瑰红短裙的女郎头顶上是七月潮湿的天空，罗西几乎没有注意到，空中还有几只黑鸟在盘旋。 天很蓝，因为风暴已经过去，她想。当我在……哦……当我在别的什么地方的时候。 她关于“别的什么地方”的记忆只留下了黑暗和可怕的印象。这已经足够了；她不想再回忆起更多的东西，她想也许她已经不想给这幅画配镜框了，她改变了主意，决定明天不让比尔看到它了，甚至连提都不再提这件事。他如果看到雷雨前的阴暗天空变成了晴空万里的艳阳天，事情便糟了。但是如果他看不到任何变化，情形则会更糟，那就意味着她自己神经不正常了。 她拣起了没有玻璃的画框。在通往客厅的大门右侧有一个小壁柜，里面放着她离开诺曼时穿的一件低帮帆布运动鞋和一件新买的廉价合成纤维汗衫。她不得不将油画放在地上，以便打开柜门，她本来可以夹在胳膊底下，这样便可以腾出一只手来，可是她不愿意那样做。当她再一次拣起画的时候，她大吃一惊，定睛看着画面。太阳躲起来了，几只黑马在神庙的上空盘旋，一幅全新的景色。但是除了这些，是不是还有些别的东西？还有其他什么变化吗？她这样想，她认为其所以自己没有看出其中的变化，是因为画面中并不是增加了什么，而是减少了什么。有什么东西消失了。又有某样东西—— 我不想知道，罗西毫不犹豫地对自己说。我甚至都不愿意考虑这件事。 但是她很为自己这种方式担心，因为她已经开始把这幅画当做自己好运的象征，一种吉祥物。有件事是毫无疑问的：正是由于罗丝·麦德这幅画对她的激励，她才顺利通过了第一天的录音工作，打消了恐惧感。所以对于这幅画她不愿意产生任何不愉快的想法，也不想对它产生害怕的感觉——但是她已经在害怕了。毕竟这幅油画上的天气从来没有发生过变化，她不知道应该怎样处理它。但是她知道它将在什么地方度过今天和即将来临的周末：就在壁柜里面，和她的旧鞋做伴。 她把它放进壁柜，让它靠在墙上，克制住让它面对墙壁的欲望，然后关上了柜门。做完这一切之后，她穿上自己那件惟一的短外套，挎上皮包，离开了房间。当她通过阴暗而漫长的走廊往楼梯口走时，有一个声音在她内心深处说：我会报答你。她停在楼梯口，浑身上下剧烈地颤抖起来，皮包差点儿掉在地上，有一会儿工夫她感到右腿疼得厉害，它一定是发生过严重的痉挛。过了一会儿，疼痛总算过去了，她迅速地冲到了楼下。我不再想这件事，她一边往汽车站走，一边想。如果我不愿意想的话，谁也不能强迫我想。我几乎可以肯定，我不愿意再想这件事了。我只愿意想着比尔。比尔和他的摩托车。 12 她的脑海里一直在想着比尔，并在这种状态下匆忙开始了录制《谋杀未来》的工作。午餐时也没有闲暇考虑油画中的那个女人。利弗茨先生带她去了一家叫做德拉·非米纳的意大利小餐馆。那是一家罗西所见到过的最舒适的餐馆，当她吃西瓜时，他向她提出了一种叫做“更加牢固的商业约定”的建议，他建议她在一份合同上签名，这份合同上说，每周付给她八百美元，或以二十周为期限，或以十二本书为期限，由她选择其中一种。这并不是罗达所说的那种可以得到一千元酬金的合同，但是拉比还许诺让她加入某个代理机构，只要她愿意，就可以参加尽可能多的广播节目。 罗西，到今年年底你就能挣到两万二千元了。还有，假如你真的需要这份工作的话……为什么要匆忙决定呢？罗西对自己说。 她问他她能不能利用周末考虑一下此事，利弗茨先生告诉她当然可以。当他在科恩大厦向她告别时，她看见罗达和科特坐在电梯口的长凳上吃惊地偷偷窥视着她。利弗茨先生向她伸出手来，她也伸出了手，以为他要握手。没想到她的手被他用双手握住，弯下腰吻了一下。从来没有人吻过她的手，虽然她在许多电影中看见过，她的身子颤抖了一下。 只有当她坐进了录音棚，看着科特在另一间房间里绕带时，她的思维才回到了油画上。它现在已经被她安全地（罗西，但愿如此）藏进了壁柜里，突然她知道它发生了哪些变化，油画里到底缺少了什么东西：是那只臂环。那个女人原来戴在右肘上，今天早上她从手臂到肩膀任何饰物也没有戴。 13 罗西当天晚上回到房间之后跪在地上，用目光在没有整理的床上搜寻着。她看见了那只臂环，它在床边的黑暗处发出微弱的亮光。在罗西看来它就像是女神的订婚戒指。臂环旁边还有些别的东西：一块小小的蓝色布条。她毕竟找到了一块丢失的睡衣。那上面溅上了一些玫瑰红的东西。看上去像是血迹，但罗西知道那不是，它们是从某种绝对不能品尝的果实中榨出的汁水。她今天早晨洗澡时从指甲缝里抠出了类似的污迹。 臂环沉极了，至少有一磅重，也许两磅。如果它是用某种看上去很相似的材料制成的话，它应该值多少钱呢？一万二千元？或一万五千元？真不坏！想一想吧，它来自一幅她用一文不值的订婚戒指换来的油画。但她仍然不愿摸它，她把它放在床头柜上的台灯旁。 她把蓝色小包拿在手里翻来覆去地看了一会儿，背靠在床头上，双腿交叉着，十足像个中学生。她打开小包的一角，里面露出了三粒种子，那是三粒像石榴籽一样小的种子，当罗西带着绝望和无端的恐惧观察着它们时，几个无情的字眼像银铃般响彻了她的脑海：我要报答你。