Chapter 363 Chapter 363 Finale (V)

It turns out that one night's snow can make the world so white, like a net of a goddess, covering the earth, bathing the city in it, wrapped in silver, cold, but with a warm visual impact, washing away A heavy and complex soul. Wanqing's heart lightened slightly, just like her life, always looking forward to a bright day, can it be as spotless and tidy as the morning after the snowy night? Wan Qing let out a hot breath, and there was a solemn calm in her eyes, that kind of tranquility, with a kind of loneliness that forgets everything. Life, death, love, hate, at this moment, it seems to have been cleansed, the sky is still cold, but Wan Qing is still on the way to the funeral home.

It is impossible for her not to take a look at a person who died for herself. She still admires death. For Mo Lingtian, for a person who is no longer there, that's all she can do. Going out, Wan Qing stopped by the snow-covered green mailbox at the corner of the community, looked at it for a long time, and made sure that the seam that was not covered by snow should still be usable, and then took out an A4 paper box from her bag. Kraft paper bag, stuffed in. No matter how slow it is, the post office can deliver this letter to Qiao Jinfan within a month, right? Feeling a little pain in his heart, after confirming that he was doing something that had nothing to do with Qiao Jinfan, he clenched his fingers tightly, letting his bones and joints turn pale, and took the steps to leave.

The originally festive New Year will never be festive at the entrance of the funeral parlor. It is snowy, the traffic is a bit inconvenient, the car is a bit jammed, and the taxi driver stops not far away in the evening. Youdao's tall figure is so familiar and almost blurred eyes. Qiao Jinfan, did he already understand her desire to leave and let her go far away? How can someone who loves so much and refuses to let go be so relieved? Based on Wan Qing's understanding of Qiao Jinfan, he will probably do it, but thinking of him enduring the pain and respecting her decision, Wan Qing's heart can't help but ache.

Qiao Jinfan, I'm sorry, please allow me to be selfish, otherwise, I don't know how to face you. "Master, let's go to the airport!" If Qiao Jinfan did not accept her departure, she would not appear in the funeral parlor now, but someone who was looking for her everywhere. Qiao Jinfan must be tired, Qiao Jinfan must have worked hard too, enduring his own pain and comforting her, this feeling, What kind of grievance and depression will it be? This kind of love is too hard. Sure enough, there are no familiar people at the airport, and there is a huge crowd, where to go, which city to go?

She chose to live with the situation and chose the flight that was about to leave soon. The surrounding figures are in a hurry, Wan Qing is in a daze quietly, these two days she is often in a daze, only when she is in a daze, her mind is blank, she is not afraid of pain or injury. The plane going south, soaring over the city, although it can't bid farewell to the past, but at least it can let her live alone with peace of mind. Yes, to live, to give up the so-called love and happiness, to live, just because she is not willing to die. There are still things she misses in this world, Qiao Jinfan, can you live happily without me, right?Just like when Jing Ai left you, there is always a kind of parting, you have to cut off the leading edge.

Close your eyes, think about nothing, sleep in the seaside city, get out of the cabin, and realize that not all places in the world are winter, there is never cold here, but only loneliness is left. The slightly lost but relaxed heart seemed to stretch a lot when the sea water roared over. No matter it was heavy or painful, she had to accept this little life in her stomach. "Plump body, keep up with nutrition, and maintain a happy mood!" After the doctor finished the examination, Wan Qing couldn't help reminding her, looking at the small shadow cast, pursed her lips, nodded and walked away.

Child, how should she maintain a happy mood and accept this child? Wan Qing wanted to laugh, but couldn't, but because she parted her lips, there were tears in her eyes. She likes children and wants to have a child of her own. In the end, this child almost pushes her into the abyss. But so far, she would rather come to the abyss to walk at night, but she is not willing to lose it. She has no courage to take away the remaining power of this life, because she still has a hope in her heart, hoping that it will belong to her and Qiao Jinfan's child. Wan Qing lived in the hotel for two days, and couldn't go on being so empty and bored, so she went to a local company to apply for a job. The manager heard that Wan Qing was pregnant, and her face was not very good-looking.

Wan Qing didn't care because she didn't count on the success of her first company. But after the afternoon, Wan Qing's complexion was gloomy due to vomiting, and the company's employment notice had already come down, which made her slightly suspicious, but she suppressed the doubt. "The report is very beautiful, and our boss likes it, so we made an exception to admit it~" The telephone supervisor over there directly expressed his welcome. After changing his attitude in the morning, Wan Qing still had confidence in her job and accepted the job gladly. At first, there was still sore pain deep in my heart. As time went by, I gradually suppressed my longing for Qiao Jinfan. I no longer miss having a warm embrace around me when I wake up. Instead, after busy day after day, He stroked his slightly raised belly.

The pain points that I was unwilling to touch before have gradually become acceptable as the number of visits to the hospital increases. "Nutrition must keep up, or you will be born like bean sprouts, and your starting point will be lower than other children!" The doctor looked at Wan Qing's thin appearance, and reminded her jokingly, Wan Qing nodded with a smile, it wasn't that she ate less, but that she really couldn't get fat, there was nothing she could do about it. "Every day, you should communicate with your children more, listen to music, and tell stories to them. People like you who have strong data and information in their brains will definitely be good at science and engineering in the future, but they have no interest. Don't keep a straight face all day long. Pregnant women must be happy physically and mentally, enjoy life, and it is best to find a man to accompany you!"

A female colleague in the company who just gave birth was immersed in the joy of being a mother. She read a lot of mother's scriptures all day long, and she showed absolute seniority to Wan Qing, a pregnant woman who was about to give birth. At first, Wan Qing didn't listen very much, because even if she listened, even if she worked hard, it would be difficult for her to feel happy. But as the child grew up, after being kicked by the child occasionally one day, she began to listen to music seriously, do yoga for pregnant women, and then read short stories, and even read some small jokes on the Internet.

Gradually, I no longer feel alone, gradually there is warmth in the absolute abyss, and gradually let myself live in peace. During this period, neither the Xia family nor the Jing family had looked for her. Wan Qing was a little thankful that Qiao Jinfan must have explained to them, but she didn't dare to think about how he was doing now, and she didn't want to think about it. She believed that Qiao Jinfan was a strong person, just like when Jing Ai left him. When they met, she really couldn't see where he was hurt, even indifferent and ruthless. Qiao Jinfan at that time was so charming. Wan Qing raised the corners of her lips slightly, a little yearning, how nice it would be to go back to the first encounter. The helpless thing in life is that when you look back on the past, you only leave regrets, unable to change it, so you have to accept it silently. "Hehe, my God, did you see that the boss who had dinner with the boss at noon is so handsome, he is no different from the Prince Charming on TV, my god, I am so fascinated!" Colleague Miao Ran, the child can crawl, she is still so noisy and enthusiastic, even if she just had a nasty phone call with her husband, she can still go crazy with other men with red eyes. Hehe, such a woman is so cute, Wan Qing shook her head, seeing her like that, she couldn't help but sigh, why can't she be lively anymore. The child kicked her again, walking more and more slowly. Sunny was basking in the sun, wearing loose clothes, and threw himself on the sun lounger, letting the sun bathe his exposed calves, and the breeze opened his legs. Under the corner of the clothes, there is a gradually round and bulging belly. When I fell asleep in a daze, I always felt that there were hands and eyes beside me. That's right, Qiao Jinfan didn't say goodbye, didn't say anything, just accepted her departure so calmly, she sometimes even naively wondered if he would suddenly come to find her one day. This summer, it was as calm as a windless sea, and in a blink of an eye, with her gradually swollen belly, Wan Qing didn't have the time to think about it. When she was free, she went to the beach and went home to sleep. Although the salary of this job is not high, it is enough for Wan Qing to live on. After setting the expected date of delivery with the doctor, Wan Qing contacted the housekeeping company to take care of herself when she was about to give birth. The weather in November suddenly dropped in temperature, and Wan Qing had already asked for leave to rest, preparing for a few days of labor. One day, she went to the mall to buy children's clothes. She didn't know whether the child was a boy or a girl, so she bought a few sets each. The picture of buying clothes with Qiao Jinfan once appeared in her mind, and she forcibly suppressed it, holding the clothes by her side It was no longer Qiao Jinfan who carried the bag, but Yuesao. "Miss Xia, you should have a good rest at home these few days. You will be admitted to the hospital in two days ahead of time. Sometimes you are not afraid of ten thousand for giving birth, just in case. It's better to be more prepared!" This confinement wife is capable and kind-hearted, and her salary is not high, but she takes care of her in every possible way, and she also gives advice on places that Wan Qing is not familiar with. "Well, I see, let's go in two days in advance!" After Wan Qing accepted this suggestion, Yuesao laughed again: "Actually, a normal birth may not be the best. If it's too painful, a caesarean section is fine!" Wan Qing checked a lot of questions about whether it is better to have a natural delivery or a caesarean section, and most of the answers said that it is better to have a normal delivery, so she decided to give birth naturally. As time went by, the baby had already integrated into her breath, unconsciously, Want the best for him/her. "I see, thank you, that's very kind of you!" Wan Qing smiled and thanked the confinement sister-in-law. From the first day she came in, the confinement sister-in-law was attentive and considerate, reminding her from time to time that there was no mother nagging, but she absolutely took care of her sincerely. "Hehe, me, it's because it was too hard for the girl to give birth to a child in the past, so I always remember it, so I am more careful. Several wives said that they will ask me to come over next time they have a child!" The confinement wife is smiling, a woman in her forties, walks quickly and works quickly, Wan Qing should be really thankful that she has found such a good helper. "When Ms. Xia is born again in the future, remember to call me. If you can't do anything else, I like to see the little pitiful face of that child when he was born. The feeling, watching it, makes my heart melt~" Wan Qing unconsciously smiled wryly, this confinement sister-in-law really knows how to joke, and she still thinks that she will call her the next time she has a baby, how can there be a next time, her Xia Wanqing's life has already ended because of this child. "Children of Sagittarius have a good personality and are straightforward~" Wan Qing couldn't help being amused by the confinement wife, this aunt knew even the constellations, Wan Qing couldn't help but stroked her belly, the child seemed to hear it, and kept kicking her with her little feet. At this time, I really wanted to have someone by her side to share this faint joy with her, but I couldn't help but suppressed it bitterly, and finally chose to turn over to sleep, fearing that thinking too much would affect the child's emotions. Even if a year has passed, even if the child is gradually accepted by her, even if life does not seem to be as bitter as she imagined, there seems to be a hole in her heart that has been unable to be filled. The day before she was going to go to the hospital, Wan Qing went shopping again, and saw a nice little dress on the Internet, so she couldn't help rushing over there. Wan Qing drank too much water in the morning and went to the bathroom. She was getting up when she heard the phone call from the woman next door. "I heard that Mr. Qiao has changed another girlfriend. The chairman is furious this time. The previous one is pregnant~" Wan Qing's mind was in a daze, Mr. Qiao, girlfriend, pregnancy and other words were like sharp knives digging into the heart, feeling unreal. That must not be the Qiao Jinfan she knew, just the same name and surname, Qiao Jinfan is not such a person. Wan Qing's heart skipped a beat, and she hurried out of the bathroom, but she could hear the woman behind her still talking non-stop. "What kind of life, a rich man, a cat who doesn't care and doesn't steal, is that a cat?" Because Wan Qing walked too fast, her emotions were stimulated, and her stomach started to hurt immediately, and when the confinement sister saw her, she was already sweating coldly on her forehead. "Call the hospital!" Wan Qing ordered the confinement wife, but her stomach ached so suddenly that she didn't have the strength to take another step. The confinement sister-in-law rushed to make a phone call. Wan Qing was in so much pain that she couldn't bear it, so she could only lean on the bench on the side, leaning lazily, but she was holding on to the pain, telling herself that it was okay, the baby was about to be born, and she Not afraid, but the feeling of pain made her a little hard to support. "Hehe, Mr. Qiao used to be an infatuated type. He was hurt by that woman, lost such a big man, and was abandoned, so he was half-hearted. I think he is very pitiful!" The woman's voice was high, she didn't feel like she was gossiping at all, when Wan Qing passed by, it hurt her heart, and her stomach hurt even more. Qiao Jinfan, did she hurt Qiao Jinfan?Was he angry at her leaving like this? Wan Qing was sweating coldly on her forehead, but she couldn't help but think wildly. Once Qiao Jinfan entered her mind, it was hard to push it away, especially at this moment, thinking that the child might not be his, and thinking of the shame he had endured, her heart ached beyond measure. The car from the hospital came soon, and the feeling of labor pain was intensifying, but the heart was torn apart. My child, because of this child, Qiao Jinfan would be humiliated more and embarrass Qiao Jinfan more. "Please relax!" While the doctor was trying to calm Wan Qing's emotions, she had a troubled heart and found it hard to calm down. She liked children, but she also carried a label of shame. She shouldn't hate innocent lives, but her complicated mood made it difficult for her to relax. Stomach hurts more and more. "If you don't relax like this, it will hurt very much. Relax, take a deep breath, don't think about anything, face it calmly~" The doctor became strict, and Wan Qing tried her best to regain her composure, but as the pain continued, Qiao Jinfan's tired face and tender and painful eyes echoed in her mind. In such a lonely year, I thought I would completely forget the pain, but at this moment, I was suddenly so scared, the child, will it be his? The reason why you are still looking forward to and looking forward to it is because you have hope in your heart? Distracted, she sweated too much as the pain intensified, and her physical strength gradually became weak, but there was no sign of the child being born. The labor pains went from morning to afternoon, and the frequency of labor pains increased. Wan Qing tried her best not to think about the child, but the child seemed to be at odds with her, tormenting her non-stop. "If it doesn't work, the mother-to-be needs to have a caesarean section, and the signature of the family is required!" The female doctor with a stern face, when she spoke like this, Wan Qing was already covered in sweat, and she was a little exhausted. When she heard these words, she felt a pain in her heart. It was up to her to decide who would sign for her, and she still did not give up. She still wants to have a normal delivery, something that is good for the child. "I'll try harder, give it a try~" Panting heavily, Wan Qing tried hard to calm herself down, took a deep breath and tried her best, but no matter how hard she tried, it seemed that she was a little bit short. Wan Qing wanted to cry in pain, but she endured it. Feeling a little numb to the pain, a little fuzzy in consciousness, Wan Qing gradually felt like falling asleep. "C-section!" The female doctor seemed to have gone out just now, and she had already helped Wan Qing make a decision. Wan Qing nodded, she had to give up her hard work, closed her eyes, felt the pain from the injection of the needle into her body, Wan Qing couldn't help clenching her fists tightly, cold sweat broke out on her forehead, a gentle hand helped her wipe off the sweat , and a big hand opened her fist, and the feeling of clasping fingers was so familiar that she suddenly wanted to open her eyes and see who was coming. Qiao Jinfan~ Is that him? With her snow-white uniform and her mouth covered by a mask, Wan Qing didn't have the strength to look up, but she was so shocked by this discovery deep in her heart that she forgot the pain. Qiao Jinfan, have you always been there? Qiao Jinfan, you won't hurt yourself because of her leaving, right? Qiao Jinfan, never left her, right? The effect of anesthesia made Wan Qing gradually feel no pain, and because of the tightness of her hand, she gradually forgot the fear of giving birth, but the anxiety deep in her heart was quietly drifting away. Child, will it be theirs, it will be! Wan Qing's heart broke at the sound of the child's crying, she didn't have time to think more, just because she saw the child's small face, she burst into tears. Exhausted, she dared not share the joy with those around her after seeing the child, but slowly closed her eyes with pain. When she opened her eyes again, it was already another day, and when the nurse came in holding the crying child, Wan Qing seemed to forget the pain in her body, and stretched out her hand to hug the child. "Baby is cute, it's a girl, three kilograms, it's a little chubby girl!" The nurse's voice was sweet, and Wan Qing's soft little life couldn't move her eyes away. She was a daughter, the one Qiao Jinfan once said he wanted. There were tears in his eyes, but the corners of his mouth were curled up. The little guy with his eyes closed, his fists were clenched tightly. He was fat and cute, but he was crying so much that it made her worry. "The baby is hungry, feed it quickly, the name Xia Lan is really not bad!" As the nurse enthusiastically reminded her, Wan Qing was immediately enlightened, and while breastfeeding the baby, she couldn't help but think of those hands during the delivery, that person, Qiao Jinfan! Has he come and gone? My heart throbbed slightly, I refused to think about it, but fixed my eyes on the child who no longer cried because of breastfeeding. In the past, Qiao Jinfan said that if it was a girl named Qiao Xialan, but now, the name she gave the child was Xia Lan without the word Qiao. After Xia Lan gave birth, Wan Qing never saw Qiao Jinfan again, or it was just a hallucination. Fifteen days after Xia Lan was born, Wan Qing carried the baby out of the hospital. The doctors in the hospital were all attentive and thoughtful, and they sent her to the door of the house. One month after Xia Lan was born, Wan Qing received a psychic and clear jade pendant. It was small and exquisite, and the material was good. The sun was shining at noon that day, Xia Lan opened her grape-like eyes to welcome the gazes of her uncles and aunts. One hundred days after Xia Lan was born, the confinement sister-in-law took Wan Qing to take pictures of the baby for a hundred days. On that day, the photographers in the photography studio were sweating profusely, fearing that any of the shots they took would not be good enough. Five months later, Xia Lan, spring came, the little guy sat in the cradle dishonestly, wanting to grab everything, Wan Qing had no choice but to cut off her long hair. When Xia Lan was eight months old, after Wan Qing came back from outside, she opened her mouth and called her mother. When Xia Lan was eight months and one day old, when Wan Qing was feeding, she called out to her father loudly. Wan Qing was stunned. Dad, who taught her? Wan Qing looked at Sister Ying, Yuesao, who smiled lovingly, as if she didn't realize it at all, she took Xia Lan's little hand and said: "Lanlan is so smart, she can learn it as soon as she learns it. Dad must be very happy to hear that!" Wan Qing looked at Sister Ying, and had to be serious this time, expressing her anger at this middle-aged aunt who had become an important reliance in her life. "Sister Ying, you weren't invited by the housekeeping company, were you?" Sister Ying looked at Wan Qing's unattractive face, but her forehead was full of wrinkles when she smiled. She hugged Xia Lan and said with a smile: "Miss Xia, you are a rich man. If someone is so painful, you should cherish it. No matter what mistakes the child's father made, which child doesn't want to have parents?" Wan Qing's eyes turned red, and all the anger was gone. She didn't know how Qiao Jinfan explained to Sister Ying, and she didn't know how he moved so many people. She only knew that he was always there, always. "Mom~" Xia Lan's childish call and her chubby little hands made Wan Qing unable to keep a straight face, she quickly wiped away her tears, and looked at her daughter who was getting more and more beautiful. Although she was still very young, Xia Lan was definitely a beautiful baby. When she looked at Wan Qing with dark eyes, she forgot all her troubles and pains. Holding Xia Lan in her arms, Wan Qing controlled her emotions and shook her arms, not letting herself think too much. "Mr. Qiao looks at the picture of the child every day, and you make him wait like this every day?" Sister Ying added another sentence, but Wan Qing was like getting an electric shock, Qiao Jinfan never gave up, Qiao Jinfan was always by her side, Qiao Jinfan condoned her selfishness and willfulness. This night, after Xia Lan fell asleep, Wan Qing couldn't stop crying. When Xia Lan was one year old, she was already a beautiful doll, and Miao Ran, who gave birth to a son, was so envious. "I said, when your daughter grows up, marry my son. Look at this little girl, she's even prettier than a child star. No matter how you look at it, you want to take a bite!" Wan Qing was amused by Miao Ran, but Miao Ran asked mysteriously: "By the way, for such a beautiful baby, the father must be very handsome, right?" Miao Ran's curious appearance was extremely gossip. Ever since Xia Lan got drunk at the full moon, all the colleagues in the company had completely different attitudes towards her. In fact, the past two years have been very pleasant, without the bitterness and pressure, especially After having Xia Lan, I feel much more comfortable in my heart. It's just that when I dream back occasionally, I always think of Qiao Jinfan, his constant garrison, and my own willfulness and selfishness. Wan Qing occasionally looked at Xia Lan in a daze, the little guy looked like someone, it was hard to explain, he had a forehead like hers, but his mouth and eyes looked like someone, Wan Qing couldn't tell. This inexplicable feeling was like sand pouring out of her heart. The aching pain made it difficult for her to relax. She could only love her child and think about nothing. When Xia Lan was one and a half years old, in Xia Tian, ​​she was already able to trot with trembling body, and often followed Wan Qing to bask in the sun. When Xia Lan was two years old, it was the end of autumn, and she did not receive any gifts or souvenirs that day. Wan Qing thought that Qiao Jinfan had finally given up. On that day, Sister Ying also offered to resign. Suddenly, the invisible warmth made Wan Qing feel uneasy, Qiao Jinfan, is she finally going to lose it completely? At the beginning, her heart was ashamed, and she gradually became self-deceiving attachment. Qiao Jinfan did not leave when she was most desperate and hardest, but after she gradually adapted to the new life, did she leave completely? When it was close to twelve o'clock, the doorbell rang suddenly. Wan Qing was a little vigilant, but a little expectant. The person standing outside the door made her stunned! "Xiaojiao?" When Wan Qing saw Qiao Huangjiao, she was a little surprised and a little scared, but Qiao Huangjiao's face was filled with tension and anger. "Sister-in-law, are you really planning to ignore my brother? Don't you even care whether he is alive or dead?" Qiao Huangjiao's words were so serious that Wan Qing's face turned pale from fright, and she said in a trembling voice: "What's up with him?" Qiao Huangjiao looked at Wan Qing's worried and nervous face, but lost a sentence in a hurry: "Because of overwork and drinking, I went skiing with a boss in Tokyo. Because I accelerated in a dangerous area, I fell to my brain. I fell into a coma in the hospital. The doctor said that he might become a vegetative state~" Before Qiao Huangjiao could finish speaking, Wan Qing's eyes were already filled with tears, she held Qiao Huangjiao tightly and said: "Take me to see him!" Qiao Huangjiao looked at Wan Qing's nervous look, and when she turned around, a sly smile appeared on the corner of her mouth. Wan Qing turned around in a hurry, holding her sleeping daughter in her arms, took some salutes and was about to follow. "Bring all your documents, otherwise you won't be able to leave the country!" Qiao Huangjiao reminded Wan Qing, but her eyes were fixed on the face of the sleeping little Xia Lan, her eyes were fixed on the face, and there was a smile in her eyes.