Chapter 11 Chapter nine

When an airlock was found to open and close automatically without any reason, a computer began to automatically alarm continuously. In fact, no reason could be found, the reason was probably out to lunch. A hole appears in the Milky Way.It lasted only one second, to be precise, and was only an inch wide, but the distance between the two ends of the hole was millions of light-years. When it closes, many paper hats and party balloons fall out of it, drifting slowly across the universe.And a team of seven 3-foot market analysts fell out, dead, partly from suffocation, partly from astonishment.

239,000 soft-fried eggs also fell out in a wobbly heap on the Pugril continent in the famine-stricken Pancell system. The entire tribe of Pugril had died of starvation, save for the last surviving man, who also died of cholesterol poisoning a few weeks later. The hole lasted only a fraction of a second, but it affected time before and after in an almost improbable way.At some point in the distant past, it affected a random arrangement of atoms floating through the void of space, causing them to combine in some rather peculiar ways.These combinations quickly learned to reproduce themselves (which is part of what makes them special), and went on to cause enormous trouble for all the planets they passed through.This is the origin of life in the universe.

Five violent opposing vortices swirled the jets and conjured up a sidewalk. Ford Prefect and Arthur.Dent lay on the sidewalk, gasping for breath, like a half-dead fish. "Isn't this going to work?" panted Ford, groping the sidewalk for a comfortable hold. "I told you I'd figure it out." "Oh, of course," said Arthur, "of course." "My wishful thinking," said Ford, "is to find a passing ship and let it pick us up." The real universe frighteningly disappears.All kinds of phantoms flashed quietly, as agile as goats.The original light burst out bursts, like sticking pieces of jelly to the space.Time dilates, matter contracts.The largest prime numbers quietly tucked into corners, hidden forever.

"Oh, come on, don't you brag," said Arthur, "the chances of that happening are very slim." "Don't argue, it's done anyway," said Ford. "What ship are we on?" Arthur asked. "I don't know," said Ford, "I haven't opened my eyes yet." "Neither have I," said Arthur. The universe jumps, freezes, trembles, and expands in unexpected directions. Arthur and Ford opened their eyes and looked around in amazement. "My God," said Arthur, "it looks like the coast in the South End of England."

"Damn it, I'm actually relieved to say that," Ford said. "why?" "Because I think I must be going crazy." "Maybe you are. Maybe you just thought I said so." Ford pondered the question. "Well, did you say that?" he asked. "I suppose so," replied Arthur. "Then maybe we're both going crazy." "Yes," said Arthur, "we're going to go crazy, all this stuff makes it look like South Point." "Well, do you think this is the South Point?" "Oh yes." "me too."

"So we must have gone crazy." "the weather is nice today." "Yes," said a passing lunatic. "Who is he?" Arthur asked. "Who - is this guy with five heads and a shit mouth?" "yes." "I don't know. Just someone." "Oh." They sat on the sidewalk, watching with a kind of uneasiness the very large children jumping in the sand, watching the wild horses sweeping the sky with the wind and thunder. "Look," Arthur coughed lightly, "if this is the south corner, there are some weird things..."

"You mean the sea is motionless like a rock, and these buildings are swaying back and forth?" Ford said. "Yes, I actually think it's weird," he continued.At this moment, with a loud noise, Southend split into 6 pieces of equal size, all of which were dancing and spinning in a lewd and wanton manner, dazzling, "It seems that something is getting more and more Strange." There was the wild howling of brass pipes and strings in the wind, steaming baked bagels popping out of the middle of the road for 10p each, and schools of frightened fish appearing in the sky.These sights make Arthur and Ford decide to flee.

They rush through walls of sound, mountains of ancient thoughts and canyons of background music, when suddenly they hear a girl's voice. The voice sounded fairly clear, but it was just saying the same thing over and over again: "2 to the 00,000th power is falling to 1." That's all there is to it. Ford stopped, trying to find the source of the sound by a beam of light, but couldn't see anything he could really believe. "What's that sound?" cried Arthur. "I don't know," cried Ford, "I don't know. Sounds like a calculation of probabilities."

"Probability? What do you mean?" "Probability. You know, like 2 to 1, 3 to 1, 5 to 4 or something. The voice said 2 to the 100,000th power is to 1. You know, the probability is too small." A giant vat containing a million gallons of custard dumped over their heads without warning. "And what does that mean?" cried Arthur. "What, custard?" "No, I'm talking about the impossibly small probability calculation 1" "I don't know, I don't know anything. I think we're on a ship." "The only thing I can guess," said Arthur, "is that it's not first class."

The space-time dimension begins to experience a convex expansion.Huge and ugly bumps. "Ah, ah, ah..." Arthur yelled, because he felt his body softening and bending in some abnormal direction, "the southern corner seems to be melting... the stars form a swirl... like a dust storm... ...my feet are sliding into the vortex...and my left arm is about to go in." A horrible thought came to him, "Damn," he said, "how do I operate my digital watch now?" He despaired He turned his gaze to Ford. "Ford," he exclaimed, "you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."

At this time, the voice came again. "2 to the 75,000th power is decreasing to 1." "Hey, who are you?" Ford squeaked. "Where are you? What the hell is going on here, and is there a way to stop it?" "Please relax," the voice said sweetly, like a stewardess in a twin-engine plane with only one wing left and the other on fire, "you're safe." "It doesn't matter!" Ford exasperated. "What matters is that I'm a safe penguin now, and my mate will lose his limbs soon!" "Well, I've got them back," said Arthur. "2 to the 50,000th power is decreasing to 1," the voice said again. "Obviously," said Arthur, "it's a bit long for my liking, but..." "Isn't there anything," said Ford in an angry bird cry, "do you think we ought to be told?" The voice cleared its throat.A huge icing cake floats away into the distance. "Welcome," said the voice, "to the Heart of Gold ship." The voice continued: "Please do not panic because of anything you see or hear. You may have some uncomfortable reactions at first, because you have just been rescued from death, and the probability of survival in that situation is only 2 to the 276,000 to 1 -- probably much less, we're cruising at 2 to the 25,000 to 1 ratio right now, and that ratio is going down. Once we've established what the normal level is, it's very Will be back to normal soon. Thank you. 2 to the 20,000th power is going down to 1." The sound stopped abruptly. Ford and Arthur in a small bedroom glowing pink. Ford felt a surge of ecstasy. "Arthur!" he said, "this is amazing! We were rescued by a ship driven by infinite improbability! Incredible! I've heard rumors like this before! But all rumors have been officially denied, Now they're definitely done! They've achieved improbability drive! Arthur, is this... Arthur? What happened?" Arthur was leaning against the hatch to the bedroom, trying to close it, but couldn't.A mass of slender little hands, their fingers stained with ink, squeezed their way in through the crack of the door; tiny voices chattered frantically outside. Arthur looked up. "Ford!" he said, "there's a million monkeys out there who want to come in and talk to us about their play Hamlet."