Chapter 19 Chapter Nineteen

As mentioned earlier: in the entire galaxy, the earthlings are the only race that regards cricket (or cricket) as a fitness activity.Therefore, others do not want to care about the earthlings.However, this is only for our galaxy, and especially only for our dimension.In the higher-dimensional world, people like to play a game called "Bad Boy Extreme Cricket"-this is an extra-dimensional translation of the original name after billions of years. "To put it bluntly, it's a nasty game," (as said)—"Of course, if anyone ever goes to a higher dimension, he'll find that it's full of nasty savages, and those people really deserve to die. ——It would be great if someone can come up with the technology to launch missiles into high-dimensional worlds.”

And that's why, if anyone wants to walk down the street and be pickpocketed, he's hired.Especially if he's willing to walk the streets in the afternoon when ordinary employees rarely show up. The history of The Guide is one of idealism, struggle, desperation, passion, success, failure, and extraordinarily long lunch breaks. The original source of the Guide, along with most of its financial records, has been lost in the mists of time. See below for more novel theories about their tracks. One veteran editor, Herring Flumi, often appears in some inspirational stories. It is said that Herring Flumi founded the Guide, established it with fundamental principles of honesty and idealism, and then went bankrupt.

Over the years, he has experienced abject poverty and introspection, living off friends, being alone in a dark room, nervous disorders, overthinking, and dramatic weight changes.By chance, he got acquainted with people from Wudunsheng Luncheon Retreat. (Those claim that since lunch is the center of the day in earthly life, and that earthly life is approximately equal to one's spiritual life, lunch should: a.regarded as the center of the spiritual life of man, and b.Enjoy it in a great restaurant. ) So he revised the Guide, setting new ground rules for it—integrity, idealism, and a place to leave them both.As a result, the "Guide" ushered in its first great commercial success.

He began to make the most of the lunch break he enjoyed as editor-in-chief, which has had a profound impact on the history of the Guide.This means that most of the actual work will be done by passers-by.These are people who just walk into an empty office, see something to do, and do it. Soon, the "Guide" was taken over by the Giant Dodo Publishing House of Ursa Minor β star, so it has a strong economic foundation, so that its fourth editor-in-chief, Rig Leary, Jr., enjoys an incomparably long and incredible lunch time.Even though the editor-in-chief in recent years even had lunchtime sponsors, compared with him, he is nothing more than a green onion.

Rigg didn't actually step down as editor-in-chief—he just left the office one morning and never returned.More than a century later, many of The Guide's staff are still convinced that he just went to buy a ham croissant and will be back soon to resume his afternoon's work. Strictly speaking, the subsequent editor-in-chiefs are acting editor-in-chiefs.Rigg's desk is still the same as when he left, with a small sign on it: Rigg Leary, Jr., missing.Estimated to have eaten. Some reactionary rhetoric with sinister intentions suggested that Rigg was actually dead, as a result of the Guide's first multiple bookkeeping experiment.Little is known about it—less, some say, than people think.It was a strange and boring coincidence that every planet on which the Guide's treasury was built was destroyed by war or natural disaster not long afterward.Not only that, but those who notice—let alone care—of this fact will be wiped out.

An equally interesting and equally irrelevant fact: on the planet Earth, just two days before it was destroyed for the construction of a hyperspace tunnel, people there witnessed a large number of UFOs.Not just over St. Jones's Forest Lord's Cricket Ground in London, but also over Glastonbury in Somerset. [① Somerset County: a county in southwestern England. ——Translator's Note] [② Glastonbury: It is a small town located in the southwest of England. It was originally a small island surrounded by rivers in prehistoric times, and it has been surrounded by various mysterious legends since ancient times. ——Translator's Note]

Glastonbury has conjured up many myths since ancient times, about ancient kings, witchcraft, wizards who heal warts meeting on the path and so on.Today, it has been chosen as the newest treasury location for the Guide.After ten years, those financial records were finally transferred to an enchanted hill outside the city, and the Vogons arrived a few hours later. The above-mentioned incidents are unbelievably weird, but they are still slightly inferior to the bad boy extreme cricket of the high-dimensional world.The rules of the full version of this game are simply too complicated.There was only one time when they were fully included in the book, and that book had gravitationally collapsed and turned into a black hole.

The condensed version rules are as follows: Rule #1: At least three extra legs.You don't need them, but it makes everyone laugh. Rule Two: Find a good bad boy extreme cricketer and clone him a few times.This can save a lot of effort in selection and training. Rule Three: Put your team and the enemy team on an open field and build high walls around it. Here's why: While the sport is entertaining, if spectators don't get to see the action, they imagine it to be more exciting than it actually is.Rather than making people watch a boring game, it is far better to make them believe that they missed the most exciting moment in the history of sports.

Rule Four: Throw all kinds of suitable sporting equipment over the wall to the athletes, anything - cricket bats, basic cube sticks, tennis cannons, skis, whatever is suitable for swinging. Rule 5: Athletes are now allowed to scurry and hit as much as they can with what is in their hands, and if anyone hits (another athlete), they should run away immediately and apologize from a safe distance. Apologies should be concise, sincere, and as clear as possible. Rule Six: The first team to win wins. Interestingly, the higher the enthusiasm of high-dimensional beings for this kind of sport, the more difficult it is to actually carry out this kind of sport—most of the participating teams are in a state of war because of the problem of interpretation of the rules.That's pretty good.Because a tough war is far less traumatic than a protracted bout of bad boy extreme cricket.