Chapter 5 Chapter 3 Tired myself to death

Heizi heard the shrew Wang Xiuhua's scream again.Her voice pierced Heizi's heart sharply.He didn't know why Wang Xiuhua made such an ugly scream.As soon as he heard Wang Xiuhua's scream, Heizi thought that Li Laifu would suffer again.In order to confirm this idea, Heizi walked out of the house.His mother asked him, "Heizi, where are you going?" Heizi said, "Go for a walk." His mother said, "If you don't study hard at home, why are you running around?" go.Mother said: "Don't run too far, go home early." Heizi agreed with a "hey".

Sure enough, another war broke out in Li Laifu's family. Li Laifu sat on the bench with a desolate expression, and Wang Xiuhua pointed to his forehead with a blower, "You are a pig, stupid pig, you can't do such a simple thing well, what can you do, you might as well die never mind." Wang Xiuhua is a well-known shrew, and everyone in the village is afraid of her. The honest Li Laifu seems to have been bullied by Wang Xiuhua from birth. , If it were me, I would have killed that mother-in-law Wang Xiuhua a long time ago." But no one seemed to dare to say such things in front of Wang Xiuhua.

Li Laifu stood up silently amidst Wang Xiuhua's scolding, and walked towards the door. Wang Xiuhua pointed at his back and shouted: "If you have the ability, go out and don't come back!" Li Laifu's body trembled. He walked towards the door in a strange way. Wang Xiuhua was so angry that she suddenly caught up and beat Li Laifu's head vigorously with a blower.Li Laifu wailed, and ran away with his head in his arms.A few spectators hid in the corners and covered their mouths to laugh. They didn't dare to laugh out loud, they were afraid that Wang Xiuhua's anger would be transferred to them.

Wang Xiuhua saw Li Laifu run away, so she went home cursing. Heizi knew that Li Laifu was the most unremarkable man in Quliu Village. Li Laifu came into Heizi's field of vision this autumn.Before this, Heizi had no deep impression on him. Li Laifu's thin body was extremely weak. The blue veins and blood vessels on his long neck are exposed, and the thick Adam's apple is always sliding up and down, as if full of huge appetite. His bloodshot eyes were deeply sunken, like two black holes, with faint flames floating in the black holes. Heizi watched him walk towards the embankment.

Li Laifu sat under a neem tree on the embankment. He looked at the big river with desolate eyes.He tugged at his withered, malnourished hair, as if trying to elevate himself to another level. It is autumn evening. The wind blows, rustling the leaves and dead grass. Li Laifu was fed up with the anger of his wife Wang Xiuhua and the eyes of the villagers. He couldn't forget that the secretary of the village brigade spit in his face and said viciously: "Useless things." It was an unforgettable contempt and a heavy blow to his soul. The little man's self-esteem that remained in his heart was ruthlessly destroyed by the brigade secretary.

He never thought that he would shrink before he was forty.The man's physical atrophy made him lose confidence in life. In the fantasy paradise, he hoped that he would regain his erection, but the repeated disappointments made him depressed.His wife, Wang Xiuhua, has already despised him for his incompetence every night. Li Laifu is terrified of his wife Wang Xiuhua's growing sexual desire.Wang Xiuhua was not satisfied, so she intensified the torture of her soul and body, swearing at each other and fighting violently.Li Laifu, who was already weak, could not resist at all. His greatest resistance was to be speechless or to escape. The more he was like this, the less Wang Xiuhua took him seriously.

That afternoon, Li Laifu fell into the abyss of despair. The boundless darkness surrounded him, and he had no ability to break out of the encirclement. That afternoon, Li Laifu was working in the fields with the commune members when he suddenly had a stomachache.He squatted in the corner of the field clutching his stomach, with cold sweat on his forehead. His soft groans and painful appearance won the sympathy of the production team leader.The production team leader said to him: "Laifu, go home and rest." Li Laifu went home clutching his stomach. As soon as he got home, he heard a sound in the bedroom that made his heart skip a beat.

The bedroom door was plugged backwards. He heard the man's heavy breathing like a cow. He heard the woman's panting and moans of joy. Li Laifu's hot blood rushed to his forehead.With all his strength, he kicked open the bedroom door.After kicking open the door, he saw two naked bodies, one was the branch secretary of the brigade, and the other was his pretty wife Wang Xiuhua. He opened his mouth. He stood there dumbfounded, struck by a colossal catastrophe. Poor Li Laifu regretted kicking the door open. If he hadn't seen this shameful scene, he might not have suffered so much.

The men and women on the bed found the astonished Li Laifu. There was a brief silence, as if the air had frozen at that moment. The deadlock was quickly broken. Wang Xiuhua sneered, holding on to the branch secretary. The branch secretary pushed her away and scolded: "Slut!" The branch secretary got out of bed and put on his clothes slowly.After putting on his clothes, he walked out the door, and stopped in front of Li Laifu who was standing still. The branch secretary spat in his face, "Useless stuff!" Li Laifu sat under the tree at dusk, watching the sky gradually darken.His heart also gradually died.

When he returned to the village with heavy steps, he found a solemn Heizi standing at the gate of the boatman's house. Heizi looked at him with very confused eyes. Li Laifu thought about death.He designed and implemented his own death plan more than once.He absolutely didn't want to live anymore, there was nothing in this world worthy of his nostalgia, and even his own son spoke ill of him, showing no emotion at all.How to die is a very urgent and huge problem for him. He wanted to starve himself to death.He didn't eat or drink and didn't attract the attention of other members of the family at all, but the feeling of being hungry was too uncomfortable.He went on a hunger strike until the third night and couldn't hold on anymore.He came to the sweet potato field of the production team, dug out the sweet potatoes, and devoured them without washing them, like a hungry wild dog.

He wants to solve his own life with pesticides. With a bottle of "Dimethoate" in his arms, he came to the woods on the mountain.He thought that tonight, no matter what, he would let himself die.He unscrewed the cap of the glass bottle containing dimethoate, and an unpleasant smell rushed to his nostrils.His brow furrowed.He suddenly thought of a rotten fish floating on the water that was poisoned by pesticides... He threw the bottle of dimethoate in the forest and walked out of the forest alone. He thought of hanging. He has seen hanged people sticking out their tongues long and rolling their eyes abruptly. That kind of appearance is extremely ugly, and if you die, you want to die beautifully. Originally, it would be shameful and wretched to walk around in this world once. He can't Choose to hang. ... He finally set himself a glorious path to death, and walked towards death step by step.At this time, in fact, his heart was as hard as iron. Heizi woke up early in the autumn morning, feeling the coolness, the boatman had gone to the ferry, and his mother released the chickens and ducks from the bamboo cages in the yard, and then fed them. He walked up the embankment. He would go to the embankment to recite the text every morning, because the embankment was very quiet and the air was very fresh.In the fresh, dewy air, the gates of his memory stood wide open. He discovered the man Li Laifu. Li Laifu filled the dustpan with soil from a piece of wasteland. After filling the soil, he walked towards the embankment with difficulty carrying the heavy load of soil.Every step he took, he had to put in a lot of effort, because the dustpan was too full of dirt.Heizi couldn't believe that Li Laifu, who was so emaciated that he couldn't even walk steadily, had so much strength.In fact, Li Laifu, who was carrying the weight, was wasting his own life.He built the soil on the embankment.He seemed to be a machine picking dirt, running back and forth silently.Li Laifu's behavior surprised Heizi. In this autumn, Heizi often saw Li Laifu constantly carrying the soil, and the embankment was gradually strengthened and raised during Li Laifu's transportation. As soon as the production team finished work, Li Laifu went to build the embankment. Even in the long autumn night, he didn't stop moving the soil, and he could work until dawn.That autumn, Li Laifu had forgotten about day and night.When Heizi saw Li Laifu every autumn morning, Li Laifu had already been working all night. Li Laifu slowly withered in Heizi's eyes. Li Laifu's actions quickly attracted the attention of the villagers in Quliu Village.People thought that Li Laifu was crazy. He built the river embankment silently by himself without any centimeters or any benefits. Working in vain like this must be due to an inflammation of the brain. Some villagers said to Li Laifu: "Laifu, if you have nothing to do, it would be nice to hug your wife at home. You can use as much strength as you have." Frost fell on Laifu's face, he lowered his head, and said nothing. Undoubtedly, the words of the villagers were a knife that pierced deeply into his heart.He thought, just wait and see, when I die, you should shut your beaks, just wait and see! Li Laifu's wife, Wang Xiuhua, was visibly angry at his actions.But Li Laifu was indifferent to her beating and scolding.Wang Xiuhua was also at a loss what to do, so he had no choice but to let him go.In her eyes, this man was completely useless, so she showed great disregard for his existence.During the long nights when Li Laifu worked hard to build embankments, she could find any man to go home and sleep, and do whatever she wanted.He and she went their separate ways in the way of life. Dramatically, a reporter came to the village that day.The white-faced man wearing glasses with deep myopia expressed great interest in Li Laifu. He used the old-fashioned Seagull camera to keep taking pictures of Li Laifu picking soil to build embankments. After taking the photo, he chased after Li Laifu and asked questions non-stop, with a pen and a notebook in his hand ready to record at any time.Li Laifu showed extreme indifference to this man in another world with a shiny parted hair. The reporter followed him for several days, but he didn't say a word to the reporter.The reporter who seemed to have discovered a treasure had no choice but to leave Quliu Village regretfully with a few rolls of film. The image of the reporter broke into Heizi's mind. On the night after the reporter left, amidst the heavy grunting of the dumb uncle, Heizi dreamed that he had grown wings and flew into the distance under the sun. When Li Laifu was carrying the soil up the embankment, he fell to the ground, his chest tightened all of a sudden, the pain was like a knife, and he suddenly spit out a mouthful of salty blood. His tongue licked his lips, the smell of blood made him feel that death was approaching, and finally a smile no one could see appeared on his face, for him, it should be a very happy smile.He believes that he will soon say goodbye to all suffering and go to a pure world, although that world is unknown.He got up and picked up the dirt again. Heizi was in awe of that frosty morning. Frost brought cold to sunspot. Even so, he still came to the embankment to read, reading is happy, he knows that he wants to leave Quliu Village to make himself stand out and live a good life, reading is the only way out.Those charming dreamy wings can only grow through diligent reading. He felt very strange. He looked between the wasteland and the river embankment, but he didn't find Li Laifu who was picking up the soil.Throughout the autumn, he had become accustomed to the figure of Li Laifu struggling to pick up soil, just like a routine scene in his narrow life circle, but now that it suddenly disappeared, his heart became empty. On that frosty and cold morning, the sound of Heizi's reading was interrupted naturally again and again.He couldn't see Li Laifu, so there was an obstacle in reading.He didn't know why Li Laifu's disappearance would make him lose his mind. He had never spoken to Li Laifu, and their communication was a kind of spiritual communication.He sympathized with Li Laifu very much. In his subconscious mind, Li Laifu's suffering was not his own.It was difficult for him to find a way to express the consciousness deep in his heart, so the disappearance of Li Laifu prompted him to walk towards that wasteland. In the grass of that piece of wasteland, Li Laifu was lying on his back, his body was covered with a thin layer of frost, which made his face look pink and white. As soon as Heizi saw Li Laifu, his heart suddenly recovered.But when he approached Li Laifu, he saw that the blades of grass around him were covered with blood.At that time, Li Laifu's body was already stiff.Heizi looked at Li Laifu's peaceful corpse, tears streaming down his face, and he ran towards the ferry, crying. He shouted to the punter: "Li Laifu is dead!" Yes, Li Laifu finally exhausted himself to death. The boatman called the dumb uncle and carried Li Laifu's body back to the village.Wang Xiuhua's sharp crying sounded loud and clear in Quliu Village.People noticed that Li Laifu suddenly had a bright smile like a flower on his face. A sad and beautiful song sounded in Heizi's heart, and that song remained in his bone marrow. Soon, a corner of the provincial newspaper published a photo of the honest and honest Li Laifu walking on the path leading to the embankment like an old ox carrying dirt.The first person to see that photo should be the secretary of the brigade. He looked at the photo and pondered for a long time.No one knows what is in his heart.Li Laifu walked on the path with difficulty carrying the last load of soil, then spat out a few mouthfuls of blood, and staggered down in the grass on the river bank.The scene was mercilessly ignored.Strangely, the grass where he vomited blood dried up later, and no grass grew for several years.