Chapter 8 CHAPTER VII

Yesterday the month dedicated to Juno (Junius, June) by the Romans ended. Today we enter on July. In ancient Rome this latter month was called Quintiles (the fifth), because the year, which was then divided into only ten parts, began in March. When Numa Pompilius divided it into twelve months this name of Quintiles was preserved, as well as those that followed --Sexteles, September, October, November, December--although these designations did not accord with the newly arranged order of the months. At last, after atime the month Quintiles, in which Julius Caesar was born, was called Julius, whence we have July . Thus this name, placed in the calendar, is becoming the imperishable record of a great man; it is an immortal epitaphon Times highway, engraved by the admiration of man.

How many similar inscriptions are there! Seas, continents, mountains, stars, and monuments, have all in succession served the same purpose! We have turned the whole world into a Golden Book, like that in which the state of Venice used to enroll its illustrious names and its great deeds. It seems that mankind feels a necessity for honoring itself in its electones, and that it raises itself in its own eyes by choosing heroes from among its own race. The human family love to preserve the memory; a great ancestor, or of abenefactor. In fact, the talents granted to a single individual do not benefit themselves alone, but are gifts to the world; everyone shares them, forever suffers or benefits by his actions. Genius is a lighthouse, meant to give light from afar; the man who bears it is but the rock upon which this lighthouse is built.

I love to dwell upon these thoughts; they explain to me in what consists of our admiration for glory. When glory has benefited men, that admiration is gratitude; when it is only remarkable in itself, it is the pride of race; the most shining examples ofhumanity. Who knows whether we do not obey the same instinct in submitting to the hand of power? Apart from the requirements of a graduation of ranks, or the consequences of a conquest, the magnitude delight to surround their chiefs with privileges--whether it be that their vanity makes them thus aggrandize one of their own creations, or whether they try to conceal the humiliation of subjection by exaggerating the importance of those whorule them. They wish to honor themselves through their master; they elevate him on their shoulders as on a pedestal; ahalo of light, in order that some of it may be reflected upon themselves.

It is still the fable of the dog who contents himself with the chain and collar, so that they are of gold. This servile vanity is not less natural or less common than the vanity of dominion. Whoever feels himself incapable of command, at least desires to obey a powerful chief. Serfs have been known to consider themselves dishonored when they became the property of a mere count en after having a prince, and Saint-Simon mentions a valet who would only wait upon marquises. July 7th, seven oclock PM--I have just now been up the Boulevards; it was the opera night, and there was a crowd of carriages in the Rue Lepelletier. The foot-passengers who were stopped at a crossing recognized the persons in some of these as we went by, and mentioned their names; they were those of celebrated or powerful men, the successful ones of the day.

Near me there was a man looking on with hollow cheeks and eager eyes, whose thin black coat was threadbare. He followed with envious looks these possessors of the privileges of power or of fame, and I read on hislips, which curled with a bitter smile, all that passed in his mind. "Look at them, the lucky fellows!" thought he; "all the pleasures of wealth, all the enjoyments of pride, are theirs. Their names are renowned, all their wishes fulfilled; they are the sovereigns of the world, either by their intellect or their power; and while I, poor and unknown, toil painfully along the road below, they wing their way over the mountain-tops gilded by the broad sunshine of prosperity."

I have come home in deep thought. Is it true that there are these inequalities, I do not say in the fortunes, but in the happiness of men? Do genius and authority really wear life as a crown, while the greaterpart of mankind receive it as a yoke? Is the difference of rank but adifferent use of mens dispositions and talents, or a real inequality in their destinies? A solemn question, as it regards the verification of Gods inpartiality. July 8th, noon.--I went this morning to call upon a friend from the sameprovince as myself, who is the first usher-in-waiting to one of our ministers. I took him some letters from his family, left for him by atraveller just come from Brittany. He wished me to stay.

"To-day," said he, "the Minister gives no audience: he takes a day of rest with his family. His younger sisters are arrived; he will take them this morning to St. Cloud, and in the evening he has invited his friends to a private ball. I shall be dismissed directly for the rest of today. We can dine together; read the news while you are waiting for me." I sat down at a table covered with newspapers, all of which I looked overby turns. Most of them contained severe criticisms on the last political acts of the minister; some of them added suspicions as to the honor of the minister himself.

Just as I had finished reading, a secretary came for them to take them to his master. He was then about to read these accusations, to suffer silently the abuse of all those tongues which were holding him up to indignation or toscorn! Like the Roman victor in his triumph, he had to endure the insults of him who followed his car, relating to the crowd his follies, his ignorance, or his vices. But, among the arrows shot at him from every side, would no one be found poisoned? Would not one reach some spot in his heart where the wound would be incurable? What is the worth of a life exposed to the attacks of envious hated or furious conviction? The Christians yielded only the fragments of their flesh to the beasts of the amphitheatres; the man inpower gives up his peace, his affections, his honor, to the cruel bites of the pen.

While I was musing upon these dangers of greatness, the usher entered hastily. Important news had been received: the minister is just summoned to the council; he will not be able to take his sisters to St. Cloud. I saw, through the windows, the young ladies, who were waiting at the door, sadly go upstairs again, while their brother went off to the council. The carriage, which should have gone filled with so much family happiness, is just out of sight, carrying only the cares of a statesman in it. The usher came back discontented and disappointed. The more or less of liberty which he is allowed to enjoy, is his barometer of the political atmosphere. If he gets leave, all goes well; His opinion on public affairs is but acalculation of his own interest. My friend is almost a statesman.

I had some conversation with him, and he told me several curious particulars of public life. The new minister has old friends whose opinions he opposes, though hestill retains his personal regard for them. Though separated from themby the colors he fights under, they remain united by old associations; but the exigencies of party forbid him to meet them. continued, it would awaken suspicion; people would imagine that some dishonorable bargain was going on; his friends would be held to be traitors desirable to sell themselves, and he the corrupt minister prepared to buy them. years standing, and to sacrifice attachments which had become a second nature.

Sometimes, however, the minister still gives way to his old feelings; here receives or visits his friends privately; he shuts himself up with them, and talks of the times when they could be open friends. blot friendship against policy; but sooner or later the newspapers will be informed of it, and will denounce him to the country as an object of distrust. For whether hated to be honest or dishonest, it never shrinks from any accusation. Sometimes it even proceeds to crime. The usher assured that several warnings had been given the minister which had made him fear the vengeance of an assassin, and that he no longer ventured out on foot. Then, from one thing to another, I learned what temptations came in tomislead or overcome his judgment; how he found himself fatally led into obliquities which he could not but deplore. Misled by passion, over-persuaded by entreaties, or compelled for reputations sake, He has many times held the balance with an unsteady hand. How sad the condition of him who is in authority! Not only are the miseries of power imposed upon him, but its vices also, which, not content with torturing, succeeded incorrupting him. We prolonged our conversation till it was interrupted by the ministers return. He threw himself out of the carriage with a handful of papers, and with an anxious manner went into his own room. An instant afterward his bell was heard; notices to all those invited for the evening; the ball would not take place; they spoke mysteriously of bad news transmitted by the telegraph, and in such circumstances an entertainment would seem to insult the public sorrow. I took leave of my friend, and here I am at home. What I have just seen is an answer to my doubts the other day. Now I know with what pangs menpay for their dignities; This explains to me the reason why Charles V aspired to the repose of the cloister. And yet I have only glanced at some of the sufferings attached to power. What shall I say of the falls in which its possessors are precipitated from the heights of heaven to the very depths of the earth? of that path of pain along which they must forever bear the burden of their responsibility? of their lives, and leaves them so little liberty? The partisans of despotism adhere with reason to forms and ceremonies. If men wish to give unlimited power to their fellow-man, they must keephim separated from ordinary humanity; they must surround him with acontinual worship, and, by a constant ceremonial, keep up for him the superhuman part they have granted him. remain absolute, except on condition of being treated as idols. But, after all, these idols are men, and, if the exclusive life they mustlead is an insult to the dignity of others, it is also a torment against themselves. Everyone knows the law of the Spanish court, which used to regulate, hour by hour , the actions of the king and queen; "so that," says Voltaire, "by reading it one can tell all that the sovereigns of Spain have done, or will do, from Philip II to the day of judgment." It was by this law that Philip III, when sick, was obliged to endure such an excess of heat that he died in consequence, because the Duke of Uzeda, who alone had the right to put out the fire in the royal chamber, happened to be absent. When the wife of Charles II was run away with on a spirited horse, she was about to perish before anyone dared to save her, because etiquette for bade them to touch the queen. Two young officers endangered their lives for her by stopping the horse. The prayers and tears of her whom they had just snatched from death were necessary to obtain pardon for their crime. Every one knows the anecdote related by Madame Campan ofMarie Antoinette, wife of Louis XVI. One day, being at her toilet, when the chemise was about to be presented to her by one of the assistants, lady of very ancient family entered and claimed the honor, as she had theright by etiquette; but, at the moment she was about to fulfill her duty, a lady of higher rank appeared, and in her turn took the garment she was about to offer to the queen; when a third lady of still higher title camein her turn, and was followed by a fourth, who was no other than the kings sister. The chemise was in this manner passed from hand to hand, with ceremoni es, courtesies, and compliments, before it came to the queen, who, half naked and quite ashamed, was shivering with cold for the great honor of etiquette. 12th, seven oclock, PM--On coming home this evening, I saw, standing at the door of a house, an old man, whose appearance and features reminded me of my father. There was the same beautiful smile, the same deep and penetrating eye, the same noble bearing of the head, and the same careless attitude. I began living over again the first years of my life, and recalling tomyself the conversations of that guide whom God in his mercy had givenme, and whom in his severity he had too soon withdrawn. When my father spoke, it was not only to bring our two minds together by an interchange of thought, but his words always contained instruction. Not that he endeavored to make me feel it so: my father feared everything that had the appearance of a lesson. He used to say that virtue could make herself devoted friends, but she did not take pupils: therefore he was not desirable to teach goodness; himself with sowing these seeds of it, certain that experience would make them grow. How often has good grain fallen thus into a corner of the heart, and, when it has been long forgotten, all at once put forth the blade and come into ear! It is a treasure laid aside in a time of ignorance, and we do not know its value till we find ourselves in need of it. Among the stories with which he enlivened our walks or our evenings, there is one which now returns to my memory, doubtless because the time is come to derive its lesson from it. My father, who was apprenticed at the age of twelve to one of those trading collectors who call themselves naturalists, because they put allcreation under glasses that they may sell it by retail, had always led alife of poverty and labor. Obliged to rise before day break, by turnsshop-boy, clerk, and laborer, he was made to bear alone all the work of atrade of which his master reaped all the profits. In truth, this latter had a peculiar talent for making the most of the labor of other people. Though unfit himself for the execution of any kind of work, no one knew better how to sell it. His words were a net, in which people found themselves taken before they were aware. And since he was devoted to himself alone, and looked on the producer as His enemy, and the buyer asprey, he used them both with that obstinate perseverance which avarice teaches. My father was a slave all the week, and could call himself his own only on Sunday. The master naturalist, who used to spend the day at the house of an old female relative, then gave him his liberty on condition that hedined out, and at his own expense. But my father used secretly to take with him a crust of bread, which he hid in his botanizing-box, and, leaving Paris as soon as it was day, he would wander far into the valley of Montmorency, the wood of Meudon, or among the winds of the Marne. Excited by the fresh air, the penetrating perfume of the growing vegetation, or the fragrance of the honeysuckles, he would walk on untilhunger or fatigue made itself felt. Then he would sit under a hedge, orby the side of a stream, and would make a rustic feast, by turns on watercresses, wood strawberries, and blackberries picked from the hedges; he would gather a few plants, read a few pages of Florian, then ingreatest vogue, of Gessner, who was just translated, or of Jean Jacques, of whom he possessed three old volumes. The day was thus passed alternately in activity and rest, in pursuit and meditation, until the declining sun warned him to take again the road to Paris, where he would arrive, his feet torn and dusty, but his mind invigorated for a wholeweek. One day, as he was going toward the wood of Viroflay, he met, close to it, a stranger who was occupied in botanizing and in sorting the plants she had just gathered. He was an elderly man with an honest face; rather deep-set under his eyebrows, had a somewhatuneasy and timid expression. He was dressed in a brown cloth coat, agray waistcoat, black breeches, and worsted stockings, and held an ivory-headed cane under his arm. a small retired tradesman who was living on his means, and rather below the golden mean of Horace. My father, who had great respect for age, civilly raised his hat to himas he passed. In doing so, a plant he held fell from his hand; the stranger stooped to take it up, and recognized it. "It is a Deutaria heptaphyllos," said he; "I have not yet seen any of them in these woods; did you find it near here, sir?" My father replied that it was to be found in abundance on the top of the hill, toward Sevres, as well as the great Laserpitium. "That, too!" repeated the old man more briskly. "Ah! I shall go and look for them; I have gathered them formerly on the hillside of Robaila." My father proposed to take him. The stranger accepted his proposal with thanks, and hastened to collect together the plants he had gathered; but all of a sudden he appeared seized with a scraple. hill, and led in the direction of the castle of the Dames Royales at Bellevue; that bygoing to the top he would consequently turn out of his road, and that it was not right he should take this trouble for a stranger. My father insisted upon it with his habitual good-nature; but, the moreeagerness he showed, the more obstinately the old man refused; it evenseemed to my father that his good intention at last excited hissuspicion. to the stranger, whom he saluted, and he soon lost sight of him. Many hours passed by, and he thought no more of the meeting. He had reached the copses of Chaville, where, stretched on the ground in a mossyglade, he read once more the last volume of Emile. The delight of reading it had so completely absorbed him that he had ceased to see or hear anything around him. With his cheeks flushed and his eyes moist, he repeated aloud a passage which had particularly affected him. An exclamation uttered close by him awoke him from his ecstasy; he raised his head, and perceived the tradesman-looking person he had met before on the crossroad at Viroflay. He was loaded with plants, the collection of which seemed to have put himinto high good-humor. "A thousand thanks, sir," said he to my father. "I have found all that you told me of, and I am indebted to you for a charming walk." My father respectfully rose, and made a civil reply. The stranger had grown quite familiar, and even asked if his young "brother botanist" didn't think of returning to Paris. My father replied in the affirmative, and opened his tin box to put his book back in it. The stranger asked him with a smile if he might without impertinence ask the name of it. My father answered that it was Rousseaus Emile. The stranger immediately became grave. They walked for some time side by side, my father expressing, with the warmth of a heart still throbbing with emotion, all that this work hadmade him feel; his companion remaining cold and silent. The former extolled the glory of the great Genevese writer, whose genius had madehim a citizen of the world; he expatiated on this privilege of greatthinkers, who reigned in spite of time and space, and gathered together people of willing subjects out of all nations; but the stranger suddenly interrupted him: "And how do you know," said he, mildly, "whether Jean Jacques would notexchange the reputation which you seem to envy for the life of one of the wood-cutters whose chimneys smoke we see? What has fame brought himexcept persecution? The unknown friends whom his books may have made for him content themselves with blessing him in their hearts, while the declared enemies that they have drawn upon him pursue him with violence and calumny! His pride has been flattered by success: how many times hasit been wounded by And satire? be assured that human pride is like the Sybarite who was prevented from sleeping by a crease in a roseleaf. The activity of a vigorous mind, by which the world profits, almost always turns against him who possesses it. He expects more from it as he growsolder; ideal he pursues continually disgusts him with the actual; he is like a man who, with a too-refined sight, considers spots and blemishes in the most beautiful face. I will not speak of stronger temptations and of deeper r downfalls. Genius, you have said, is a kingdom; but what virtuous man is not afraid of being a king? He who feels only his greatpowers, is--with the weaknesses and passions of our nature--preparing for great failures. Believe me , sir, the unhappy man who wrote this book is no object of admiration or of envy; but, if you have a feeling heart, pity him!" My father, astonished at the excitement with which his companion pronounced these last words, did not know what to answer. Just then they reached the paved road which led from Meudon Castle to that of Versailles; a carriage was passing. The ladies who were in it perceived the old man, uttered an exclamation of surprise, and leaning out of the window repeated: "There is Jean Jacques--there is Rousseau!" Then the carriage disappeared in the distance. My father remained motionless, confounded, and amazed, his eyes wide open, and his hands clasped. Rousseau, who had shuddered on hearing his name spoken, turned toward him: "You see," said he, with the bitter misanthropy which his later misfortunes had produced in him, "Jean Jacques cannot even hide himself: he is an object of curiosity to some, of malignity to others, and to all he is a public thing, at which they point the finger. It would signifyless if he had only to submit to the impertinence of the idle; man has had the misfortune to make himself a name, he becomes public property. Every one rakes into his life, relates his most trivial actions, and insults his feelings; he becomes like those walls, which every passer-by may deface with some abusive writing. Perhaps you will say that I have myself encouraged this curiosity by publishing my Confessions. But the world forced me to it. They looked into my housethrough the blinds, and they slandered me; I have opened the doors and windows, so that they should at least know me such as I am. Adieu, sir. Whenever you wish to know the worth of fame, remember that you have seen Rousseau." Nine oclock.--Ah! now I understand my fathers story! It contains the answer to one of the questions I asked myself a week ago. Yes, I now feel that fame and power are gifts that are dearly bought; soul, both are oftenest, as Madame de Stael says, but undeuil eclatant de bonheur! Tis better to be lowly born, And range with humble livers in content, Than to be perkd up in a glistering grief, And wear a golden sorrow. [Henry VIII., Act II., Scene 3.]