Chapter 15 13

The mountain. The cathedral. The stone steps. Music. Looking down. The windows, apertures. Rows of seated people. The altars, lights, singing. Egg-shaped apertures like seats opening onto the void. in the seat. Thomas slipping in the seat. Toward the void. Brace foot against edge. Lean back hooking shoulder around opening. Out strolling on the grounds. Flowers blue with a border of white. The Dead Father strolling. Julie strolling. Edmund strolling. The music, a Kyrie. The edge. The fall. Stone steps. Mandrills staring. Photographers and cooks. Thomas sitting in the sloping seat. Slipping toward the edge. Braces foot against the outer wall, which trembles. around inner wall and grasps with left hand. Out strolling. Julie speaking to the Dead Father. The Dead Father smiling. People sitting on stone benches. .Acolytes.R ings with amethysts. The edge. Looking over the edge. Sheer walls. Clouds. Thomas slipping in the seat. Braces right foot against outer wall. A quilt or blanket slipping toward the edge. Shoulder hooked around inner wall. alcove shaped like an egg. Quilt slipping toward the edge. Singing. The mountain. A set of stone steps. The cathedral. Bronze doors intricately worked with scenes. Row of grenadiers in shakos. , curving. Rug or quilt of blue and red slipping toward the edge. In the walls of the cathedral. Windows over the edge. Dies irae, dies illa. The Dead Father sitting in the cathedral gardens. Julie sitting at his feet. The Dead Fathers head thrown back against the wall. Julie sketching. Edmund standing near the edge. Edmund eating. People climbing the stone steps in pairs. Standing near the edge. Bronze doors opening. the red canopy.following, through the doors. Curving white-painted brick but a stone is loose, several. Pressure against the right edge, which trembles. Grasping the inner edge. Trying to wedge shoulder against the rear wall but the rug is sliding toward the edge. Erotic and religious experience. Thomas strolling about the gardens. The Dead Fathers head thrown back against walls of the cathedral. Julie sketching.

It is possible to fall here, Julie said. I feel it, said Thomas. Very possible to fall, she said, I get a falling feeling. Are you frightened, beloved? Thomas asked. He stuck his sword in the ground and put his arms around her. Arms around me, she said, that is what I like. Always arms to put around you, always and everywhere, said Thomas. Move up more under my breasts so that the bottoms of the breasts can rest upon the tops of the arms, said Julie. Not in front of me, said the Dead Father. The tops of the brown arms, said Julie. The whites of the bottoms of the breasts, said Thomas.

They disengaged. Is that horseman still following? Emma asked. Still following, Thomas said. Still. Julie moved to Emma. Then your bed was taken away from you. Yes. A certain butcherliness not inappropriate. Will you let him see it? Hard to tell. Dominant tempo of our national life. Throws you into no-go situations. Tricycle a bit in the evenings, now. Spent his time wetting the bottoms of women. Youth comes to the fore, youth has its hour of glory. Like a photograph of a photograph. Probably we should have spoken up before this. Gray day, gray day. I was ill, endless series of unpleasant dreams.

Be grateful if you could find the time to see me. The terrible temptation which was assailing me will now be understood. Where the buffalo roam. I had rubbed myself thoroughly with oil and I carried a large flask of whiskey. Have to be a little bit tougher. Thought I heard a dog barking. In wild places far from the heart. Tiny silvered hairs that I had thought mine alone. A lady always does. Told them how Lenin had appeared to her in a dream. Thats your opinion. Two dozen white roses accompanied by his card. I read about it in the Corriere della Sera. Its been so long, been so long.

Free to leave at any moment. Where can a body get a baiser around here? Attending, departing, arriving, ignoring. Hoping this will reach you at a favorable moment. Fish scales, wastepaper. Inching by dying by. Not sad or serious. It was the damnedest thing. What? It was the damnedest thing. What? Old Danish saying. What? Repetition is reality. I read about it. In Politikken. The care that a bystander is obliged to exert for an accessible encounter extends past civil inattention to the question of how and when he can present himself for official participation. I read about it. In a book.

Yes. Ervings. Yes. Slit your nose for you. Your many kindnesses and especially favor. Eats his kids they say. One way to look at it. Thought I heard a hog barking. Joyous and without joy. The bourgeois press told stories. Faces? Yes faces. What? Faces. Something about faces. Always been very interested in faces. Im not into that. Forever and ever and ever and ever. Also possible to be a damned fool. Im not into that. Don't blame you I was raised in the faith. What? I was raised in the faith. What? Been so long, so long. Attending, departing.

Hes a drunk. Which one? All of them. Must be a reason for that. Have you tried any of the others? Follow a track by night. What? Steer by the stars. Extremely interested in this position. Make his ear glow. Fill his brain full of frisks. Must be a reason for that. Her charms had made it possible for her to gain a close insight. Glad to hear it. This idiot had led a thoroughly disorderly life. Sorry to hear that. Covered with butter. Chocolate butter? Yes chocolate butter. Its the urge to confess. Ive heard about it. Its sunset across the bay. Its pencil shavings in the wind.

Tried to get a handle on it. Give you a shot in the kisser. I can take care of myself. No you cant. Therell always be another chance tomorrow. No there wont. Want to get better but seem to be getting worse. Thats your opinion. Constant memory in the making. That's one way of looking at it. The whole thing hinges. Ive heard that. So as not to have to defecate while being accessible to others for talk. I can understand that. Now let us briefly review the kinds of. Been waiting all day. She was vulgar. She was? Very vulgar. She is? Yes very vulgar. Vulgar to a fault.

Really? One of the most vulgar. Most consistently vulgar. Im surprised. I didnt know. The vulgarest. Vulgarity everywhere. Happy to have been able to spend this time with you. So fucking vulgar you wouldn't believe it. Its red sails in the sunset. Its moons over Miami. I didn't really mean that really. I was wrong I realize that now wrong. Were you raised in the faith? No. You werent raised in the faith? Yes I mean I was but I busted out. Vulgarity everywhere. The wink is a classic device for establishing. Thats true. I thanked the large black woman and withdrawn.

Holding on tight. Thats right. Holding on tight. Years not unmarked by hideous strains. I remember. Wild and free and. Pray to St. Jude. And Ganesha. I really didn't mean that really. Were you raised in the faith? I was raised partly in and partly out of the faith. How did that feel? Foul. It felt foul? Yes foul. Foul foul foul. Being raised in the faith felt foul? Thats what I said you hard of hearing or something? I think foreplay is the most interesting part. Yes foreplay is the most interesting part. Some people like consumption. Ive heard that. But in my opinion foreplay is the most interesting part. Its more interesting.

Haven't thought much about it really I studied English. Some people like to get it the hell over with. Yes Ive heard that. Most of it is interesting if you are interested in it. Ive heard that. You must have studied anatomy. In extenso.