Chapter 17 Sixteen, Yumeng

In the evening, after KC picked us up, it began to rain lightly. We each stayed in the hotel for a while, and KC came to knock on the door and said that the hotel had arranged a bonfire party by the river for us, but now we can’t do it. Yes, but I’m leaving tomorrow, so I’m going to have a good time today, so I invite the two of us to watch the local dance performance in the tavern, and then have a drink and leave without regret. Holding an umbrella, we walked through the rainy and misty fields and villages with KC, and arrived at the tavern. The tavern is actually a semi-open air, just a big grass shed built in the middle of a large open space, outside the grass shed is a cloud of rain and fog , in the big thatched shed, with colored lights hung and candles lit, this lonely tavern poked in the middle of the lawn was dressed up happily and brightly lit as much as possible.

After the tourists sat down in twos and threes, the thatched shed became very popular. Because of the rain, many activities were forced to be cancelled. Tourists from nearby villages probably gathered here. The performance started. The local boys danced hard on the small stage with bare feet and drums. After the group dance and solo dance, it was a human-animal dance. The boy danced with the peacock—the peacock Of course it was dressed up by humans. After the dance, there was a fire-breathing show, and after the fire-breathing, there was a stick dance. After more than an hour of performance, the boys' faces were covered with sweat, but the effort was not diminished at all. The boys We danced hard, and we couldn't help watching seriously. We drank while watching, and cheered loudly. At the end, the boys caught the tourists up one by one, formed a circle, and began to dance to the sound of the drums. Wang Can and I They were all pushed up by KC. I was a little embarrassed, but Wang Can was very relaxed. He jumped and added movements designed by himself. , everyone tried to follow the rhythm and turned in circles.

The stage is too small, the grass shed is too low, the lights are too dim, when I stomp my feet, the dust on the floor rises up, it is such a stage, but I dance and dance louder and louder, following the rhythm and the crowd Laughed out, everyone was laughing, someone accidentally stepped on the foot of the person in front, someone jumped while holding a wine bottle, more and more people came to the stage, the drums became faster and faster, when they turned around, I saw Outside the hut, the rain and night are mixed together, silently lurking in this wild grassland, but the joy in the hut, the horsepower is very powerful.

I have always felt that "the bigger the heart, the bigger the stage" is a ridiculous saying, the bigger the heart, the smaller the stage you allow to be on, in your eyes, it is too small to fit your body, and it is untenable. Probably because of drinking, I became more optimistic. I said to myself, even after returning to Beijing, the stage for me to work hard is still so big, and there is still no applause. I will be coaxed off the stage at any time, but I will think When I think about it now, when I think about me dancing on such a crude stage, I smile very happily. I can occasionally be Cheng Tianshuang.

After the whole performance, everyone returned to the stage, exhausted from dancing, gulping down beer, and I was no exception. Wang Can was carrying a beer, and got together with the group of dancing little boys, toasting in turn, clapping Shoulders, like a brother who has already worshiped the handle, I just smoothed my breath when KC came over, sat down beside me, and clinked glasses with me. "Cheng." KC raised his head and looked at me intently, with a deep expression and watery eyes, "Cheng, you are leaving tomorrow." I nodded: "Yes." "Will you come again?" KC asked this sentence like reciting poetry.

I was stunned: "Should, I probably won't come again..." After hearing this, KC had a particularly heartbroken expression on his face, and his eyes were instantly filled with sadness. "Cheng, will I not see you after that?" I can't understand the situation at the moment, is KC going to confess to me?It shouldn't be, I don't look so cute, and I haven't laid the foundation for this kind of relationship in the past two days. But when I thought of the deep affection and romance of Nepalese men, I was afraid that I, who already had a layer of horny on my heart, would hurt him with my careless answer, so I said cautiously: "Objectively speaking, it should be, but I will remember your……"

KC nodded darkly: "Understood, I will remember you too." There was an embarrassing silence, when I wanted to run away, KC turned around, sat down at the next table, and clinked glasses with a blonde girl with big breasts and fat buttocks at the next table: "Mary, I will never see you again, Right?" I watched the same heartbreak, the same sadness, KC performed it again with the blonde girl, and it turned out that the last parting confession was KC's performance after drinking. I drank two more glasses while laughing, and gradually my whole body relaxed, and the laughter and noise around me became far and near.

"Cheng Tianshuang! Let's touch each other too!" When I looked back, Wang Can had already returned to our table, but with a peacock crown on his head, and several blue-green feathers dangling from side to side on the top of his head. I pointed to the top of his head: "You take this off first, it makes my eyes dizzy." Wang Can touched the top of his head and was taken aback for a moment, obviously forgetting when he put this thing on top. After Wang Can took off the peacock feathers, he moved closer to me: "Hey, Cheng Tianshuang, can you take my car tomorrow?"

I glanced at him: "I have a car, why take yours?" "You rented a car too? What kind of car?" "...It's also a convertible." I thought about my "car" and the panic sitting on the roof, and my tone hesitated. "You can go with me, I will pay for all the food and water on the way, how about it?" I glanced at Wang Can and decided not to speak until I figured out his way. "You can go with me, anyway, you are also a companion. On the way here, my translator and driver ignored me. I was so bored that I started counting the hairs on my legs, and I think those two buddies are old. They blackmailed me, stopped for dinner on the road, and they charged me ten dollars for a fried noodle! Your English is good, follow me on the road, you can save me some money, and you can be comfortable, win-win!"

I was a little tempted by the words: "It's fine, but I will share the fare with you equally, and I will pay you as much as I should, and I will not owe you." Wang Can patted me on the shoulder carelessly: "That's it! It's money or not. We've all seen crocodiles together. It hurts our feelings." Wang Can raised his glass, touched it with me, and took a big gulp. "Besides, if you go on the road with more than one person, you can have some fun..." Wang Can winked at me. After hearing this, the defensive net that I had just dismantled opened again with a "bass".

"Looking for fun, son? What kind of fun are you looking for?" I asked Wang Can with my eyes wide open. Wang Can laughed, his face flushed red from drinking, and he showed a row of white teeth: "Don't think so dirty!" I relaxed for a while, and put the net back. With Wang Can's IQ, what I'm looking for probably won't be the "fun" I understand. "But you... don't think so simply." I turned around and stared at Wang Can: "What do you mean?" "Look, we two, a man, a woman, a road, there are all kinds of possibilities! Anyway, you just follow me, let's have fun, and you can brag to your friends when you go back, saying How wonderful it is to catch a happy little Kai on the road and compose a hymn of life together!" Wang Can imagined it to his heart's content, but every word he said seemed to hit me in the face. "When we get to Pokhara, if we get along well, we can hang out together for another day. You follow me, follow me Canye, I tell you, I will keep you as happy as if you were bitten by a magpie every day. It's cool. In fact, I have been on this journey , I found that you live a very tired life, you are very twisted, you can't get used to anything, you brag to yourself every day, this is not good, you should take a bath for your soul, I! I can help you take this bath... ..." My anger had already rushed to the top of my head, but I still tried my best to hold it back and asked, "You mean, we can have an affair?" "Don't put it so vulgarly! We are in Nepal now, not Gongti Sanlituner! It's not called Yanyu here, it's a spiritual encounter. You see, we're going back to China in two days. It's fate anyway, what do you think? " I stared at Wang Can coldly, and Wang Can was still laughing stupidly. "Besides, I think I'm very suitable for you. If you talk to me more, I can help you correct the bullshit you're bragging about. I've been to many places you talked about, buddy. Sister, it's not what you said Like, you take a lesson with me, it will help you go back and brag better, right?" "Then I have to thank you." I squeezed out a few words through my teeth, and my anger was enough to ignite the alcohol in the glass. "Hi!" Wang Can waved his hand, "You're welcome!" I was so angry that my kidneys would burst, I picked up the big black umbrella hanging by the table, and slashed at Wang Can head-on, shouting as I slashed, "Who! He! Mom! Follow! You! You! You! Already!" The umbrella was about to fall on Wang Can's head. Wang Can reacted very quickly this time. He even dragged the chair back and grabbed the tip of the umbrella with his right hand. "Fuck! Isn't it illegal to beat someone when you come to Nepal? It's addictive!" The umbrella was held tightly by Wang Can, and the two of us held onto one end of the umbrella and were deadlocked. "What's the matter with you?" Wang Can desperately tried to pull the umbrella over. I was trembling with anger: "I really should check how big a crime it is to kill a person in Nepal, so people like you should be kept here, and there will be fewer scourges in Beijing." "As for what? It's in Nepal. I really want to take you to play. You think I can see you in Beijing? You take yourself too seriously!" When I was so angry that I couldn't control it, I touched the switch button on the umbrella, and without thinking about it, I pressed it hard. The old-fashioned big black umbrella opened with a "bang" and hit Wang Can's face. Wang Can was pushed by the umbrella, and he and the chair fell to the ground. The cups on the table were swept down with a splash, and the guests around looked at us one after another, but there was only a second of silence around us, and everyone continued to chat as usual. Wang Can was lying on the ground in a daze, I stood up, squatted on top of his head, stepped on the back of the chair, and looked at his face. "Who are we who take ourselves too seriously? Is it you? Why do you think I can have fun with you? I have the word 'good hookup' written on my face? I look like a joke The kind of person who eats? Yes, I am poor, I am a pariah, I earn less than you spend a day in a year, and I am looked down upon when I come out to play! When we crowded the public, you were driving a sports car When we were saving down payment, you put money in sacks to show off your wealth online, we swallowed your anger and greeted people with a smile for a small position, you worshiped Buddha and donated temples everywhere, looking for the meaning of life, and listening to your fucking inner voice, Do you think I am special? Do you think my back is bent? That is because when I straighten my waist, I have to hit the ceiling! Why is our ceiling so low? Because there is no money, no money to pile it up, So where did my money go? Where did the chance to straighten my back go? It was all fucking taken away by people like you! You took it away, and now you have to get away from it Looking for fun on me? Yes, in this society, whoever has money is entitled to be an asshole. A dog who gets into the position of the richest man can make people walk on all fours, but Wang Can, you should too. Wake up, you don’t have to worry about food and clothing, you live a bright day, have you ever thought about where the money comes from? People like us are forced to donate it to you! To put it bluntly, you people like you have to call us Mom! We have been supporting you so that you can't wean you! Do you still want to have fun with me?" Wang Can looked at me motionlessly. Although I was in a rage, I vented out the long string of words word by word without stumbling. With a stiff face, Wang Can pushed my hand pointing at him away, got up from the ground in embarrassment, and wanted to leave, but after taking two steps, he turned around and came back. "Cheng Tianshuang, you really think too much. In my eyes, you are just a woman. I never thought about how poor you are and what you do. I just think you are very interesting and want to talk to you more. I know what kind of person I am, I don't have the time to put gold on myself, and I didn't expect that we are both human, but if there is a team behind you, and you can fight against me with class conflicts, then we will be How about this, then pretend you don’t know each other, okay? Just pretend I just farted, okay? Have fun? I can’t afford class conflicts. You have self-respect and self-love, but the society is sorry for you, and the society has always insulted you. I can't compare to integrity, I'll go, okay?" Wang Can took two more steps, but he still couldn't hold back his anger. He turned back and said, "People like us? Do you know who I am? I kill everyone with a stick... It's easy for us to get money, right? My father spent his life drinking with an official a few years ago, and when he returned home, he vomited green and then red. The green was bile, and the red was blood. He had gastric lavage for three days..." "Isn't it just for the money? Isn't it just to earn a few more millions and lose your life? People like you, don't you live for money?" Wang Can choked, and let out a sigh of relief: "Okay, people like us want money but don't want to die. As long as the money is in our hands, the heartbeat will not stop, okay? But I can't figure it out, and you look down on money. , and look down on people like us, so what are you trying to live in such a twisted life now? You even changed the name given by your parents, and you made up a dummy for yourself, why go to Toss Kanna picks truffles, you are basking in the sun on a small island, don’t you pretend that you don’t have to worry about eating and drinking, then who are you playing? Are you playing someone like me?” Wang Can looked at me coldly, the alcohol gradually dissipated, the world around me was quiet for a few seconds, I could only see drunk tourists hugging and persuading each other in the straw hut, everyone was very happy. Confidentially, even if the world stood still for me for a moment and let me say those words in the most vicious language, what I attacked was not Wang Can alone, but a large group of imaginary enemies with blurred faces standing behind him. , I hated them for a long time, so long that I forgot where my original hatred originated. Outside the world where Wang Can and I are hostile to each other, the thatched shed is still full of colorful lights, singing and laughing, horses running and dancing. "I changed my name because I couldn't be Cheng Tianshuang. My parents wanted to name me Tianjiao at first, but they were afraid that this name would put too much pressure on me. But then I found out that even the simple wish of Tianshuang was replaced by me." My parents can't realize it, you may not know what Yumeng means, these two words, it is me now, I have always known what I am." I left the thatched hut first, the rain is still falling, the clothes will not be soaked, but become damp little by little, the light behind me is getting farther and farther away from me, in that light, Cheng Tianshuang once briefly appeared on the stage , but soon, it was dampened by the raindrops of reality, and the shadow gradually turned yellow, became brittle, and then shattered. When I walked across the lawn alone, the rain gradually stopped, but I don't know if it was fog or tears, but my face was still wet. Footsteps sounded behind him, and KC chased after him. "I'll take you back." KC and I walked side by side in silence, and KC didn't make a sound, just holding a flashlight to help me illuminate the path under my feet. We walked across the lawn and walked along the embankment to the hotel, surrounded by silence. On the river, there were animal calls from time to time, and I couldn't help asking KC what animal was calling. KC walked to the river and shone the flashlight into the distance. The light beam passed straight through the mist and illuminated a small area of ​​the river. On the river, a group of ducks called and slowly swam along the water. All the energy in my body seemed to have been consumed in the tavern just now. I squatted down on the embankment tiredly, silently watching the duck disappear from sight. "Why the ducks go home so late (why the ducks go home so late)?" I asked KC casually. KC thought for a while, and squatted down beside me, "For the food." He said. For the food. Because of this answer from KC, I wiped the fog from my eyes and stood up again. I changed my name to "Cheng Yumeng" two years ago. In fact, at that time, "Cheng Tianshuang" was already dying. At that time, I was working as an advertisement copywriter in a small company. Creative planning of restaurants. The owner of that restaurant told me as soon as he came up: "Our restaurant needs to play the cultural card, from the logo to the decoration, the name of the private room, and the introduction of the dishes, all need to have a sense of historical precipitation. Now I have an idea. The famous book is used, have you read it?" I honestly shook my head. "Oh, people of your generation don't have any background. You can't do it. You go back and take a good look, and then we can talk about it." I went back and hugged and knelt for a month, and finally figured it out. When I chatted with the boss again, I found that he might not have read it, but just flipped through it. It took another month to come up with ideas. I drafted four versions of the plan, no matter how small the details were, I didn’t let go of them. During that time, all the nightmares I dreamed were all kinds of strange beasts. The boss listened to me chatting twice, At first I was very satisfied and let me let it go, but then he got busy and left this matter to his daughter. His daughter is about my age. The first time I showed her the idea was in a pet grooming shop. While she was watching her teddy dog ​​grooming, she listened to me explain the plan to her. "So old-fashioned, who would like it?" "Your father wants to use this creative point..." "I don't think so. I should use something more interesting. You should think about it... Hey, if I want to dye the fur of our family Coco, what color should I dye? Light blue or pink yellow? " "Light blue?" His daughter nodded: "Okay, then I will choose pink and yellow." I had a stalemate with his daughter for a long time, until the boss came back from a business trip. In the last meeting, the boss just glanced at the sixth version of the plan I made. : "I've thought about it recently, I'm afraid it's not appropriate to make a theme... Have you read time travel novels?" I shook my head honestly again. "I haven't seen this one, but my daughter gave me a good suggestion, saying that this theme should be made into a time-traveling style, which should be good. For example, the lobby is modern, and the corridor is a shuttle. Hey, once you enter the private room, you will go back to the Tang Dynasty! It should be interesting, you go back and find some time-travel novels to read, and we can talk after reading it." Later, I did not follow up on the case of this restaurant. The company felt that I was not capable enough and sent other colleagues there. Yumeng is a kind of monster in the movie. It has a human shape, but it has a pair of very short wings. It can fly, but it can't fly very far. Yumeng lives in the country of Yumin, near the mountains. They stand on the side of the mountains all day long. Trying to fly farther and farther with wings, but always falling down, always failing miserably. It's not me. After returning to the hotel, I was wearing damp clothes, sitting motionless by the bed, looking in the opposite mirror, as Cheng Yumeng, I knew the hypocrisy and affectation of this name, but I fell in love with it at first sight, For so many years, when I left the planned route, when I lowered the bottom line again and again, when I put on a show just to make others look up to me, when I became the kind of person I looked down upon when I was young, I needed someone to shout I said: Hey, Cheng Yumeng.