Chapter 10 Chapter 9 Where is the direction of making money?

Spring Festival is coming. Today is the twenty-eighth day of the twelfth lunar month, and I returned to "home". I'm in a corner with nowhere to go.Before Zhou Yuan and I formally discussed whether the marriage would survive, I had no other choice but to choose to go back "home". I haven't seen Zhou Yuan for a long time. When she saw me, she had a complicated expression. I once told Zhou Yuan that I would take the insurance premium with me when I went home, and I broke my promise.Zhou Yuan didn't mention the insurance premium, nor did her mother-in-law. I don't mention it either.what?I couldn't come up with any money.

According to the custom, many relatives will come to the mother-in-law's house on the first day of the new year, including Zhou Yuan's two cousins-in-law and one cousin-in-law. My father-in-law has three brothers and sisters, but their descendants are all daughters. Except for me, the husbands of their sisters are all good. Because of preparing meals for the first grade of junior high school, New Year's Eve was very busy. Zhou Yuan and her parents were in and out of the kitchen.I wanted to help out a few times, but my father-in-law signaled for me to rest by myself. I felt like an extra piece of furniture that didn't quite fit anywhere, so I was in the living room with my son watching TV—like a guest.

My mother-in-law suggested asking Zhou Yuan to buy me a set of clothes, saying that it was already Chinese New Year, and my clothes were still so old, and that the new year was a new look, just to make a good start. I am sensitive to the fact that there will be guests tomorrow, and my old clothes will kill the scenery. I admit that I am very sensitive. Since my situation has declined, I have become very sensitive. I often regard other people's kindness as a donkey's liver and lungs. This is probably a common problem of the downtrodden. Zhou Yuan gave me 300 yuan and asked me to buy it myself.

I took the money and took my son's hand into the street, imagining the lively scene tomorrow. I can dress like a dog, but if someone asks about my career, how should I answer? Everyone has a career, but I am the most obvious shadow under the sun. The street is full of lanterns and colorful lights, which is a festive scene, but I am feeling desolate. At a stall selling fireworks and firecrackers, my son refused to leave, so I bought him 120 yuan worth of fireworks. Without buying clothes, I took my son's little hand and went home.When I entered the door, I held the phone to my ear and pretended to be talking loudly.

I returned the rest of the money to Zhou Yuan, saying that I had an important friend who came from Shanghai and wanted to talk to me about starting a business partnership, so I had to leave immediately. My father-in-law and mother-in-law didn't make a sound. They must know that I don't want to see those relatives-thanks to them for not exposing my lies. Zhou Yuan stuffed the remaining more than one hundred yuan into my hand again, and I turned and went out. The sound of my son's crying came from the crack of the door, and I sighed softly. I spent the few days during the Spring Festival in my younger brother’s rented house, and my younger brother went back to his hometown.Before my brother left, I told him not to tell his parents about our predicament.

There is rice, noodles, and oil in the house.On the rickety writing desk beside the bed, there is also a cobbled together computer without a case, which my younger brother usually uses to watch TV. During the day, I basically lie on the bed and watch TV. When I’m hungry, I order some noodles to eat; at night, I wander the streets alone, watching the gorgeous fireworks on the street.Occasionally, I would imagine my son setting off fireworks.The son is timid, probably Zhou Yuan is playing it, and the son is just clapping and laughing beside him, right? This Spring Festival, how many people are like me?

What lingers in my mind is my thinking about the future. I didn't think about how to get rich, I was thinking about how to survive. The Chinese New Year is only a few days away, and if I want to survive, I will eventually have to get out of my brother's rented house. I was thinking, is it really fate that I have gotten to where I am today?No, it must be that I am not doing well enough. Or, I made a mistake at a critical moment. I think the watershed in my life was when I went to that technical secondary school, which made me unable to look back. Before I went to technical secondary school, I was an authentic farmer, working at sunrise and resting at sunset.Flat, lifeless, but very real.Even if I didn't do well, no one said anything, since I'm a rural person anyway, so it doesn't matter if I do well or not.

After reading, everything changed. As a rule, after reading the book, you should be able to get along well. To use an idiom, it is called climbing up the stairs. If you don't climb up the stairs, you have to bear the strange eyes of others: He has read so many books, why is he confused like this? I remember that before, I joked with my colleagues: "I have a way out, and I can still go home and farm." It was a joke, because I knew I couldn't go back.If I go back to farming after studying, it must be big news, I can't stand it, my family can't stand it. So, once someone thinks you're doing well, you have to do well.

In many cases, people really don't live for themselves.