Chapter 39 Thirty-eight, another possibility

"It's impossible to hide it anymore, Mr. S!" I stood at the door of the room, looking down at Mr. S. "Ah? What did you say? Suddenly..." Mr. S's voice was obviously shaken and uneasy. "It was you who killed the kitten and puppy, right? Mr. S?" "Didn't I say it wasn't me! I said it many times—" "I have evidence!" I brought the map data paper and the composition manuscript paper in front of Mr. S. "Do you have this map at home, too? We distributed one to all the students during the commemoration of entrance."

"Well, ahhh. Yes." "Mr. S, you marked the places where you killed kittens and puppies with fire marks on this map. When you made the marks, there was a manuscript paper under it. That manuscript paper is for us to take home and use Came here for an essay assignment.—So. Those X-shaped traces left on the first page of the essay are not secret marks at all. They are just imprinted on the bottom when you draw marks on the map. Is that so? Mr. S?" Mr. S giggled in the bottle. "I thought you found something. This is it. How stupid!" "How stupid?" How stupid? — Mr. S imitated my tone full of mockery, and suddenly laughed loudly.

"I said, Husband, is there something wrong with you? I don't know anything at all, so I'm just guessing!" I was silent, just looked at Mr. S quietly. "Okay, okay, I'll just tell you about the X-shaped mark. It's annoying to make you say so much! Like you said, that's when I marked it on the map and found the kitten The place where the puppy's body was left was imprinted below." "really--" "But wait a minute! Mr. Dao, you are always in such a hurry that you are prone to make mistakes!" Mr. S smiled. "The truth is this. That day, I spread out the manuscript paper at home and wanted to start dealing with Chinese homework. I thought, 'I must write well!' But I couldn't write well. There was no idea in my mind. You know about composition, you can’t just write if you want to, so I wanted to change my mind. At that time, I suddenly remembered that I found the corpse of a kitten and a dog nearby recently. Those poor little animals Where on earth was the body found—I don’t know why, but this incident came to my mind. So I took out the map and put it on the manuscript paper. I was thinking about the places where the bodies of cats and dogs were found. One side drew an X-shaped mark on it. So the pencil marks were printed on the manuscript paper below. That's it."

This explanation is as I expected. "It's strange that you can remember the places where the bodies were found so clearly. Isn't it abnormal? I'm afraid you can only remember so clearly if you did it yourself?" So Mr. S replied: "Ah, I forgot. ——I was a little confused when I wanted to draw an X-shaped mark on the location where the body was found, so I read the newspaper. Isn't there a map in the newspaper? There's a circular mark on it. That's what I looked at, and then I marked it on the map we sent out. I was so confused, I forgot to tell you that. It does sound a little weird without it."

"It turned out to be like that. It was drawn according to the marks in the newspaper..." I lowered my head and sighed. "That's right. The morning paper is the marked map published on July 12th, and the date we handed in our homework was exactly one week before Mr. S died, that is, on July 13th. After handing in the homework It’s not surprising to write an essay the night before.” "That's right! By the way, or I forgot. At that time, I read the newspaper that morning. I just looked at the map in that newspaper, and then drew on the map we sent where the body was found."

After being silent for a while, I confirmed that Mr. S seemed to have nothing to add, so I opened my mouth slowly. "It can't be like that." I pointed out Mr. S's failure. "The newspaper published the map not on July 12th, but on July 16th—that is, the third day after we handed in the composition. So Mr. S, you said that you found the corpse according to the map in the newspaper It is impossible to draw a mark or something. Moreover, we handed in the homework on the 13th, and the eighth corpse had not been found at that time. But eight X-shaped marks were printed on the manuscript paper. S Jun, how do you explain this? Why do you know in advance where the next body will be found?" I paused, and after a long silence, Mr. S finally spoke. "You lied to me."

I suddenly felt a pain in my chest.However, it's not that I've become weak in that moment. Mr. S seems to be blaming me for covering up. "Yes. I lied to you. But you wouldn't be telling me the truth if you didn't!" "You still don't believe me." There was another pain in the chest.To hide it, I raised my face and said loudly, "Of course I can't trust you. Because until now: you've told me too many lies. You told me the night you first appeared in this room. , The kittens and puppies were all killed by Mr. Iwamura. Then after I saw your mother yesterday, you said that you definitely did not do the kittens and puppies. Are all these lies? Isn’t it all nonsense? "I raised my voice.

"Aren't you lying to me? Mr. S!" Downstairs, Mei Xiang hummed happily.I was extremely irritable and stared straight at Mr. S, without blinking, and never took my eyes off Mr. S for a second.If I didn't, I'm afraid I'd lose confidence in myself.I felt such uneasiness fill my heart. "I didn't lie to you. Teacher Iwamura told me that he killed those kittens and puppies. This is true. I didn't do it at all. This is also true." "I won't believe those words anymore!" "Then let me ask you. Why did I break the legs of those kittens and puppies? Why did I stuff soap into their mouths? Mr. Dao, how do you explain this?"

"These are not important right now. Just explain yourself slowly later." I absolutely refused to take my eyes off Mr. S.For the first time in my life, I treated a person with such an attitude. Mr. S seemed to be speechless, just cowering in the nest. "You killed those kittens and puppies. Do you admit it or not?" After waiting for a long time, Mr. S finally answered. "No, I don't admit it. However, it can't be said that absolutely nothing was done." I frowned, still staring at Mr. S. "I don't remember clearly. Those memories when I was still a person are forgotten bit by bit."

"Now it seems that I have lost the memory of the nine years I have lived." Mr. S said with infinite nostalgia. "Are you panicking again?" "I really didn't lie. I really don't remember. I can't help it. I can't figure out what's going on. The memory of being a human has faded a little bit shortly after my reincarnation. It's only now that I realize , I always feel illusory when I think about it, but now I know about reincarnation." "lie!" "Why is it a lie? Daofu, do you understand? You have never died. Why don't you die once, Daofu? Try it once and you will understand what I said. Yes, that's all right, just die once How about it? Dao Fujun? How about dying once? Is it okay? Is it okay to die once?"

——Is it okay to die once—— I felt the pent-up anger burst out like fireworks.His vision suddenly became pale, and the depths of his throat were constantly burning.I understand that this kind of feeling is definitely not the first time.The anger towards Mr. S that has been accumulating in different forms bursts out like fireworks in my heart, just like the damp fireworks last night, bursting out little by little.Approaching the moment of the final eruption.I've just been kidding myself about this.Just kept pretending not to know. I took a deep breath. "Mr. Daofu, what are you going to do? Do you want to get angry with me? Or do you want to kill me like yesterday?" "I didn't want to kill you. I don't remember doing it." "No! Mr. Dao, you just want to kill me. You must have thought so when you put the bridal spider in my bottle. There are things around you that you don't understand, and you don't know what to do, so I just wanted to kill me, and I was afraid to continue to be involved in this matter. If I didn't exist, there would be no need to expose Iwamura-sensei. The matter of the cat and dog being tortured and killed——the matter of the mother-in-law is the same ——As long as the key I no longer exists, all these problems will be solved. And you, Mr. Taoist, have no way to pursue the truth, so you have to stop. So you—” "I'm going to get to the bottom of it. Mr. S's matter, the cat and dog's matter, and the mother-in-law's matter. I absolutely want to get to the bottom of it!" "Then get along well with me! Trust me! There is nothing else What other good way to continue." Neither of us spoke for a full minute, just staring at each other like this.The sound of a plane taking off could be heard in the distance, as well as Meixiang's singing. "Let's go ahead and have a look." Mr. S said abruptly.It seemed as if he let out a sigh of relief and put aside all his emotions. "How?" In order not to be restrained by him, I carefully chose the language of my answer. "Start again. Forget everything I said to you now. Throw away all doubts about me, and start everything from scratch. This way, you will definitely find other possibilities. Mr. Daofu, by then you have never Another possibility that has not been noticed is sure to arise." "Another possibility?" "Yes, that is to say, if the murderer who killed the kitten and puppies is neither Iwamura-sensei nor me, then there must be some strange person appearing. Daofu-san, after listening to me, first treat Iwamura-sensei as The murderer. But after talking with my mother at my house, I think the murderer should be me. Now, you forget all this. Come, you see, what will happen if this happens?" what will happen? "There is another person, right? The person who is related to many things." That person. "Can't figure it out yet? Well, I'll give you a hint. This hint is the same as last time, good luck." Good luck. "Thought it out. The day you found my dead body. And the morning of the school assembly. How was Dae-gil?" "That day. Daji...will pounce on me...it's never been like that before..." "What about the morning of the school assembly?" "Yeah... Daji is still jumping over..." "Who are you rushing towards?" "Grandpa..." "That's right! You finally understand. Then the next question. What's the reason why Daji jumped at you?" "That's because I saw the dead cat's body before I went to your house, and it was very close. I smell like a dead cat..." I can't stop thinking about it.Daji reacted to the smell of animal rotting on me that day.So the reason why it jumped at the old man was also because the old man also had the smell of rotting animals? Mr. S's mother said that when she was worried that the old man's work clothes would be soiled—"It's okay. I haven't washed it for a few days anyway..."—that's what the old man said at the time.Could it be that Daji reacted like that because of the smell of rotting animals on his grandfather? if it is like this-- "Yes, that's right." Mr. S said slowly. "The one who killed those poor kittens and puppies was that kind-hearted old man." Everything that followed was like a dream.My body has been separated from my will, moving around at will.I left Mr. S there, left the room by myself, went down the stairs, and passed through the hallway. "Brother, are you going out?" I heard Meixiang's voice coming from behind, but I still walked out of the house. 12:15 p.m., August 4th. "Ah, no, no need. I'll call again." After explaining to the girl who answered the phone, Taizo hung up the phone, staring down at the black phone with empty eyes.Officers Yawei and Takeli were absent.In fact, it might be better to let them call. In any case, it was difficult to walk to the police station by myself, so I decided to call.But now, can I make up my mind to dial that number again?Can you show your courage? Cicadas are chirping.Taizo turned his face to the courtyard. Since getting married, he has been living in an apartment with his wife and daughter.Taizo bought this house more than 20 years ago.Choosing here is also a compromise.Because both his wife and daughter insisted that there must be a yard, but Taizo didn't think a yard was necessary.Therefore, the result of the discussion was to choose this house.Because there is an oak forest here, the yard doesn't look like the yard of an ordinary house, but like an open space in the corner of the forest.The wife and daughter also tentatively thought it was a yard, so they reluctantly accepted it.The year before last, after his wife passed away.Taizo thought about tearing down the yard.But due to financial reasons, I had to give up in the end. But Taizo still hated the yard.The fact that he had a yard in his own home disgusted him. Why is this so?His memory was awakened again. A rural town in Kyushu where I lived as a child.A rented home with such a small yard. On the day of my mother's funeral, there were many neighbors coming and going in the corridor seven who came to help.Suddenly that voice was heard.Sounds that your ears can't get used to. When Taizo heard that strange sound, the helpers were putting Taizo's mother into the coffin. --what-- Taizo, who was only nine years old at the time, was staring blankly on the porch looking at the yard.He stood up and looked over.In one corner of the yard, five or six women from the neighbors were gathering there.Among them were the mothers of Taizo's classmates, and the proprietress of the dry goods store that Taizao often went to.In the center of the group is the mother wrapped in white.The women were bending over, doing something desperately and unnaturally. ——Why, do such a thing—— Taizo stared at them, unable to believe his eyes.Did I read it wrong?He craned his neck and squinted his eyes, but he was sure he was right. --Why-- The women collaborated with each other, deadpan. "That voice..." They broke the mother's leg.Accompanied by a low, dull sound like being wrapped, they indifferently broke the mother's legs. --Mother-- Taizo was speechless for a moment. ——What kind of resentment is there—— At that moment, some scenes emerged in Tai Zao's mind, and it was the word "resentment" that reminded him. The still young mother was crushed to death.Doctors were also confused because there was no warning before death. After his father passed away, his mother raised Taizo alone without any relatives. Mother is really beautiful.That beautiful appearance makes Taizo, who is his son, very proud.The mother is extremely moving as a woman.All these facts and questions are always circling in Taizao's heart.Then, like foam rising from mud, an idea popped into Taizo's mind. --Could it be that-- Taizo shook his head, trying to deny this idea.However, it is impossible for the still young Taizo to dispel his own thoughts. —Could it be that they— The women who surround the mother now have husbands of their own.Could it be that.Are mothers and themselves dependent on their husbands for sustenance?And this was discovered by those wives?Then, they decided to punish their mothers for having an affair with their husbands, and conspired to poison her! Once you have this idea, you will find that many things in your daily life are consistent with it.Once my mother took Taizo on the street.A man stopped his mother, and the two whispered on the street.The man's ruthless face.Mother nodded hesitantly. For several days after that, my mother came home very late.After returning home, mother hardly looked into Taizo's eyes.Moreover, the mother seemed to have the smell of tobacco mixed with it. For the past month, Taizao always felt that something was wrong.The mother of the classmate still has the indifferent attitude of the proprietress of the dry goods store.By the way, just a few days before his mother died, the proprietress asked Taizo a very strange question, asking him if he had any food that he hated.Taizo replied that he didn't like boiled clams.After answering, Taizao was very puzzled, why did he ask such a question? —Ahhh—the food my mother ate for dinner the day before she passed away.The things that Taizo didn't eat were placed on the side of the dining table close to his mother as usual, so Taizo didn't pay too much attention to it.What kind of food would that be?Brown, small things.Isn't that boiled clams? ——Certainly can’t be wrong—— Taizo glanced at the corner of the yard, staring angrily at the women who were doing that thing with indifferent expressions. —They killed my mother and daughter— They are afraid that their mother will be reincarnated. As long as the legs are broken, the woman killed by them cannot be reincarnated.A woman noticed Taizo staring at him intently.That turned face was very familiar to Taizo.The woman with the sagging cheeks and the full lips.She is the policeman's wife.He is considered a leader among the women in the neighborhood, and always tells others what to do.She seemed to be in charge of the horrible thing they did just now.The policeman's wife whispered something to the women around her, and immediately, all eyes turned to Taizo.Expressionless, indifferent eyes. Taizo stood up slowly.I wanted to say something, but I couldn't say a word.With trembling legs, and with his back to the yard, Taizao ran back home quickly, passed through the hall and the porch, pulled the straw sandals and ran out of the house, muttering something silently in the back of his throat, and ran out frantically. —They killed my mother— Taizo ran desperately, shouting in his heart. —Mum was killed by them— That day, Taizao spent alone in the mountains curled up with his knees in his arms.I didn't watch my mother's funeral, nor did I listen to monks chanting scriptures.The mother's body was buried in a cemetery at one end of the village.At night, Taizo staggered back home, the house was empty, only the dark and damp tatami mat greeted Taizo. Three days later, the policeman's wife was killed.He was said to have been hit in the head by a stone and died on a deserted roadside, his face covered in blood.The murderer is never known. --Could it be that-- After hearing about this incident, Taizo rushed to the cemetery where his mother was buried.It was a place in the mountains where the sun could not be seen, and it would be creepy just to look at it. Among the rows of tombstones, only the one engraved with the mother's ring was lying on the ground, and the black soil was piled up in a mess.When I got closer, I saw that the tomb was empty.At the bottom of the tomb, the lid of the coffin was half lifted, and the situation inside could be vaguely seen.No matter how you look at it, it seems that there is no remains in there. ——Mom has been reincarnated—— The smell of earth rises. ——Mom was reincarnated, and then killed the woman—— Taizo felt extremely terrified of his mother's attachment.The fact that the dead are reincarnated easily paints a horrific color on the nine years Taizo lived with his mother.The once gentle mother's face instantly became terrifying. A mother crawling out of the dirt little by little. A mother who walks the streets looking for someone to hate. The mother who stretched out her rotten hands to hold the stone. The mother who lifted the stone and threw it down. A week later, Taizo was taken away by his father's former friends—a couple living in Tokyo. What happened in remote areas in those days did not spread quickly.What happened to that place afterwards, or whether nothing happened at all, Taizao knows nothing about it.But this intensifies the fear of his mother in the heart of Taizo, who lives in Tokyo.Living in a strange place, Taizao always felt inexplicable panic and timidity.This stems from the fear of the dead, but also from the fear of the mother. Of course, as time went by, Taizo gradually became like the people around him.Began to think that reincarnation of the dead does not exist at all.But the strong impression of his childhood memories kept him from accepting this idea.On the contrary, that kind of terror took root deeply in Taizao's heart as a latent emotion.Later, even if Taizo had a family of his own, it was still the same.Even though time has worn away life and the body is getting older, nothing has changed.Taizo never mentioned it to anyone, so that kind of terror was like an invisible hand firmly grasping Taizo's heart. "despite this……" Even so, that kind of terror has not completely dominated Taizo, it is just like an ulcer in the abdominal cavity, using the occasional pain to make Taizo uncomfortable, that's all, it will never be forgotten anyway, so I am so worried It's okay to live on—Taizao has always thought so.But-- There was a moment when the feeling became more tangible. It was originally hidden deep in my heart, but at that moment it suddenly turned into a black hand, reaching out to shake Taizao desperately. "The accident..." That summer night a year ago. "If it wasn't for that..." In a dark alley.Lying on the asphalt road, the little girl whose head was bleeding, looked up at Taizao with wandering eyes. —I will never forgive— —I will never forgive— —I will never forgive— The little girl repeated the same sentence over and over again mechanically.Taizo stood by the side all the time, staring blankly at the little girl's pale cheeks. Finally, in front of Taizao's eyes, the little girl exhausted her last bit of strength.The voice died away, and the lips did not move. ——I didn’t do it—— --not me-- Taizo muttered to the little girl who had died of anger.The little girl was motionless, her limbs were slightly opened, and slowly stiffened. - have to call an ambulance - Taizo came to his senses and hurried to call an ambulance.At that moment, the scene he saw when he was young inadvertently appeared in Taizo's mind. --Mother-- Fallen tombstone.Messy black mud.The dark tomb.An empty coffin.Mother climbed out.Holding a huge stone, the rotting body kept walking.Search.Look for the person who has a grudge in his heart.The one who killed himself. --not me-- Taizo turned around slowly. --Mistaken-- He looked at the little girl lying on the side of the road.A slender leg exposed under the skirt was resting on a stone beside the road. When he came back to his senses, Taizo had already raised his right foot high, and stepped heavily on the little girl's soft knee.Just at that moment.Taizo heard that same voice.The voice of nothingness that sounded in the yard back then. --not me-- The broken, sideways little girl's leg slipped from the stone onto the asphalt.The other leg was still resting on the rock. --not me-- Taizo stared at the other knee, and raised his foot high again.