Chapter 7 Section 5

Ms. Orange said that she attracted the attention of the world, but I would not be so innocent as to fully believe her words.I knew twenty years ago that I had no such luck.I am afraid of standing in front of people.It is more in my nature to live an ordinary life as one of the multitude. Ah Chun is very timid - I don't know how many times my parents have said to me, especially my father, who has always hated me.When my father was young, he came out to explore and finally opened a small design firm. Probably because of this, he asked his son to be as energetic as he was.Whenever I was bullied by neighbor kids and ran home, he would yell at me.

I can't remember when, once my father insisted on letting me climb a big tree near my home.I don't know how to climb trees, but I still managed to climb up because I was afraid of being punished.When I climbed down to a thick branch, my father said, "You jump down from there." I didn't dare to jump, so I lay down on the branch and cried.My father opened his arms and said, "I'll catch you, jump!" I just kept crying.At this time, the mother ran over and said, "Why do you let the child do such a dangerous thing? Don't you know that he can't do it?" The father still opened his arms in silence. After a long while, he lowered his hands and turned to go home.As usual, I cried and wondered why my father did this.

When I was in high school, I started painting at home, and my father’s face became even uglier, saying that young men have more things to do outside, and even said that it’s not a big deal to do two bad things—usually parents don’t talk to their children like this Say. At this time, the mother always said "No, Ah Chun is very timid..." and added "seriousness and kindness are the advantages of this child".Father became more and more unhappy. I was a senior in high school when my father died.Subarachnoid hemorrhage.The doctor said that he worked so hard that he probably died of so-called karoshi.Father is really hardworking.I had wanted to go to the Academy of Fine Arts, but at this point I had to change my plans.My father left a little inheritance, and my mother said that she could go out to work to support me, but I couldn't be so worthless.

Being able to go to school and earn a salary—attracted by such good conditions, I took the entrance exam for the systematic vocational school in the factory where I am now.Besides painting, I am also interested in machinery. The academic system of the school is four years like that of the university.So far so good.However, my mother's heart attack left me at a loss.One day, I came home from school and found her collapsed in the kitchen.I know that no one can protect myself in the future.I cried silently for days. "Don't embarrass yourself, just live like yourself." My mother often said that when she was alive.She understands me.I also live like my mother said, ordinary and unknown, which is more suitable for me.

One night, Dr. Tang Yuan walked into the room with Assistant Ruosheng.Unlike previous inspections, the doctor carried a large folder under his armpit.I'm a little nervous. "how are you today?" "good." "Yeah." The doctor nodded, and sat down on a chair beside the bed, "I'll give you a test today, the purpose is to confirm how much your brain function has recovered." "I feel recovered a lot." "Well, after listening to Xiaoju's report, I know that your health is good. However, brain damage will manifest in completely unimaginable ways, and we have to be extra careful." The doctor opened the folder on his lap, "First Ask for your name, then your age and where you live. You'll probably say, isn't that obvious, but remembering yourself matters."

"I wouldn't say that. My name is Naruse Junichi, I'm twenty-four years old and I live in..." I answered fluently. The doctor asked about family and experience again.When I mentioned my parents, Miss Tachibana, standing behind the doctor, lowered her eyes.She is a kind woman. "You said you once wanted to be a painter?" "Yes, now I also like to draw." "Oh, now?" The Doctor seemed interested. "I basically paint on the weekends." I probably still have the canvas I started painting spread out in my room right now. "What do you draw?"

"I paint everything, but recently I mainly paint portraits." The model is always the same. "Yeah." The doctor straightened up a little, licked his lips, "Now, do you still want to draw?" "Yes." I replied without thinking. He then asked a few more questions, and finally gave me a written intelligence test, which measured my ability to calculate and remember.I feel that my intelligence seems to be the same as before the accident. "Thanks for your hard work, let's stop here today." The doctor put my answer into the folder, stood up, and then looked down at me as if he remembered something, "Xiaoju told me that you want to send a letter to a friend It is approved."

"Thank you." I nodded on the bed. "Your friend is called..." The doctor took out a small piece of paper from the pocket of his white coat, "Yamura Hui——it's a girl." "Yes." I felt a fever on my face. "No wonder. In fact, since you were brought here, there seems to be a girl who runs to the information desk every morning to inquire. Maybe it's her." "Probably." Let me put the ugly words first, "The doctor looked at me more seriously than before, "At this stage, we must keep all the materials about your actions, so the letter you wrote must also be sent to the other party with a copy. "

"Let me publish the letter?" I was taken aback and raised my voice. "It will not be made public." The doctor said affirmatively, "It will only be kept temporarily as our information, and will not be shown to anyone. It will be destroyed in front of you when it is not needed." I stared dumbfounded at the faces of the doctor and the two assistants in turn, neither of them showed any intention of changing their minds. "I can't help it." I shrugged, "Can you send her the original of the letter? Sending a copy is really..." Tang Yuan and Ruosheng looked at each other, and finally nodded at me: "Okay, let's make a step too."

They both walked out.After a while, Ruosheng came back alone, holding a disposable camera in his hand, as if he wanted to use it to take pictures of me. "It's rare to take a photo." He lent me the electric razor.I can't thank you enough.If I were unshaven, I wouldn't be able to concentrate on anything. After shaving, Ruosheng took a few random photos for me and asked me to choose the one I was satisfied with.Which one is pretty much the same.Seeing that I don't look like a patient in the photo, I feel relieved. "Is it your girlfriend?" he asked before leaving.

He asked in a very natural way, and I replied nonchalantly, "Ah, that's right." After a while, Ms. Orange brought a postcard and a signature pen, and said that I had written it tonight and put it next to the bed, and that I could give it to Ah Hui when she came next time. Convinced that the sound of her footsteps had faded away, I reached for my card and pen.As long as I can get in touch with A Hui.Ah Hui must be very worried about me, and she might be as happy as a child when she receives my letter——I feel my heart pounding when I think of her. The first time I met Megumi Yemura was two years ago, when she happened to work as a clerk in a painting shop I frequented.She is not a beautiful woman, but she has an aura that warms the air around her.I had the urge to talk to her without the clerk-customer relationship, but I'd never dated a girl before, and I couldn't even ask her out to a cafe.All I could do was stick to the store for as long as possible, picking up as many odds and ends—the more I bought, the longer I would spend facing her at the register. It was she who spoke first and asked me what I was painting.I was so excited that I hurriedly talked about the flowers that I had just started painting.I don't know if I have described the artistic conception of the painting. After hearing this, she said that she really wanted to see the painting. "Then I bring it next time?" For me, it took a lot of determination to say it. "Really? I'm looking forward to it." Ah Hui put her hands together in front of her chest. When I got home that day, the underarms of my shirt were soaked with sweat.I was overjoyed to be close to her. The next day, I excitedly came to the painting supplies store with the painting.The moment I pushed open the glass door, I noticed the situation in the store——Ah Hui was talking to a young man who looked like a student. His expression was not the kind that a store clerk would treat a customer. It was more affectionate than when he faced me the day before. I didn't go in, I went straight home, threw the painting aside and fell asleep.I hated my stupidity—she wasn't particularly affectionate with me, but with everyone, and if I did take the painting, she would be embarrassed even if she didn't say anything. I had the same experience before, when someone was a little more affectionate to me, I became dizzy and had the illusion that the other party was interested in me.Whenever I realized it was nothing more than affection or a social gesture, I hated myself and felt hurt. I didn't go to that store for a long time after that, for some reason, I was afraid of running into Ah Hui. I ran into her again later, not in the store but on the bus.I noticed her right away, thinking that she might not remember me, so I didn't say hello, but she pushed through the crowd and walked over. "I haven't seen you recently, are you busy?" Ah Hui asked. As for me, just seeing her and remembering myself, my mind went blank. "Ah, no..." I was incoherent. She went on to say, "Have you finished drawing the flowers yet?" what!I cried out in my heart. "Didn't you say you would bring it last time? I've been waiting for it. You didn't come, so I think it's probably not finished yet..." I stared into her eyes and thought, she really is a good girl, she didn't just say that casually.I am ashamed of myself for not trusting her kindness. Hearing me say that the painting was finished, she seemed to want to see it right away.As soon as I gritted my teeth, I asked her to come and see her at home, and she was very happy: "Wow, is it okay?" As if in a dream, Ye Cunhui came to see my paintings at home and was full of praise.I would love to hug her tightly, but it's just not possible.I sat at the farthest position from her and looked at her, satisfied as if I got a unique work of art. From then on, every time I finished a painting, I would show it to Ah Hui.There is no proud work, but I am very happy to see her observe and comment carefully. "You really like drawing flowers and animals." Ah Hui said once.That's all I showed her.I said that I actually wanted to paint portraits. "Paint people?" "Yes. But no models." I looked at her expectantly. She must have understood what I was hoping for.She wrinkled her freckled nose and asked with a smile, "Is it okay not to be pretty?" "It's better not to be pretty." Hearing what I said, she bit her lower lip and gave me a gentle look: "You say that, it's hard for me to be a candidate." From the next day.She came to my place after work and made me a model.Although painting is the purpose, the time spent together with her is even more precious to me.We open up to each other.She said that she left her parents and came to Tokyo alone. She used to dream of being a designer, but she gave up when she found out that she had no talent, but she didn't want to live on her parents, so she just worked to support herself. "You gave up your designer dream at such a young age." Hearing what I said, Ah Hui laughed so lonely. "I was young but I didn't have any new ideas at all, so I gave up." "Designers don't rely entirely on new ideas, do they?" "It's okay, you don't need to comfort me. I have long understood that I am below average in every aspect. It is not eye-catching, and there is no special merit." "You caught my attention, and it was a pleasure talking to you." I wanted to talk about her good points, but realized that my words were a confession of some kind, and I couldn't help but blush. She also said a little shyly: "Thank you, I like your kindness." My face turned even redder. I tried my best to reproduce the charm of her in my own eyes on the canvas.How to truly and beautifully describe the freckles that symbolize her charm is particularly difficult. Her condition was not to paint nudes, which I have always followed.About a month after my first visit, she took off her underwear in front of me for the first time after I confessed my love.I don't even have experience with kissing, let alone sex, but I think I can do anything with her.We fell in love in a room full of paint supplies. Ah Hui's body appeared in my mind.Her long legs are her pride. When I came back to my senses, blood had begun to flow between my legs.Haven't taken the doctor's test on sexual ability yet, it seems unnecessary.I picked up the signature pen, thought about it, and wrote the first line on the postcard: "Qianlue, I'm fine."